Beneath The Billionaire 541i2j

Beneath The Billionaire

By Jessie Knight

Text Copyright©2021 by Jessie Knight All Rights Reserved

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or otherwise, without the express written consent of the author, except in the case of brief quotations for the purpose of book reviews.

This book is a work of fiction. All names, character, locations, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination. Any semblance to actual persons or situations is entirely coincidental.

Table of Contents Chapter 1 Valentin Chapter 2 Anna Chapter 3 Anna Chapter 4 Valentin Chapter 5 Anna Chapter 6 Anna Chapter 7 Anna Chapter 8 Valentin Chapter 9 Anna Chapter 10

Anna Chapter 11 Anna Chapter 12 Anna Chapter 13 Anna Chapter 14 Anna Chapter 15 Anna Chapter 16 Anna Chapter 17 Anna Chapter 18 Anna Chapter 19 Valentin Chapter 20 Anna

Chapter 21 Valentin Chapter 22 Anna Chapter 23 Valentin Chapter 24 Anna Chapter 25 Anna Chapter 26 Valentin Chapter 27 Anna Chapter 28 Valentin Chapter 29 Anna Chapter 30 Anna Chapter 31

Valentin Chapter 32 Anna Chapter 33 Anna Chapter 34 Anna Chapter 35 Valentin Chapter 36 Valentin 3 years later

Chapter 1

Valentin So, the day Mother Nature decides to unleash her fury with an early spring blizzard is the day I meet HER. But I’m getting ahead of myself. It’s been a hell of a winter, and I haven’t been socializing that much with anyone other than the crew that works for my company and my household manager, Señora Madora. Señora Madora is a lovely woman, and a self-proclaimed psychic. Think Teresa Caputo with a Spanish accent. And around the same time last year, she predicted that in a year I would meet the love of my life and some other things, which are too embarrassingly strange to even think about. Señora Madora was very specific, said the woman I’d meet would be blond, blue eyed, and young. The young part is completely not my type BTW; I’ve never dated a woman younger than myself, too much drama for my tastes. Part of me knows that Señora Madora told me those things trying to push me to get back on the horse again. But I find myself standing here, fueling my truck and I get this hair prickling, electric tingling kind of thing go down my spine, and when I look up, I see a real-life Goddess. The first thing I notice is the attitude, second, she’s wearing combat boots and with her hair whipping about her face, she looks like a force of nature to be reckoned with. She’s not from around here. That much I can tell by the NC license plate. Doesn’t have snow tires on her jeep, and we’re about to get a blizzard. What the hell is she doing out here in this weather? She looks completely out of place, and that’s an understatement. Why is this girl not dressed for the weather? No sign of skiis, and all’s she’s wearing is a hoodie and ripped jeans. Her hair is crazy long and straight and blows all over the fucking place as she steps out of her jeep. She tucks her hoodie to her, and I catch a glimpse of her curves beneath the shapeless fabric. I do love curves on a woman. She walks in my direction, as I silently will her to look at me. At that moment, she does, and time comes to a standstill.

Our eyes lock for a moment, and a blush races across her face. She drops eye lock, grabs the fuel nozzle, and jams it into the side of her car. I study her vehicle, reminded of Señora Madora’s predictions that the woman would be from the south. My eyes return to her, and I catch her staring at me. She stills for a moment, despite the wind aggressively whipping her long hair across her face. It’s an expressive face, one with vivid blue angelic eyes, sensuous pouty lips, and flaxen hair. She wraps one arm about her middle, trying to stem off the cold with her barely there hoodie that keeps falling off one shoulder. I am sorely tempted to offer her my jacket, but I know she wouldn’t take it, I can tell by her demeanor. Her phone jangles again and before I can say a word to her, she takes off at a clip towards the convenience store, a scowl plastered across her expressive face. I follow, intent on discovering her name and story. Would I be doing this if Señora Madora had not made any predictions? Yes. Why? Her damned bold attitude. Her aliveness. The combat boots and the curves. So many things. Lucky for me she doesn’t know who’s coming for her.

Chapter 2

Anna The air is a frigid 28 degrees Fahrenheit and the wind blustery, as I pull into a gas station in Newport, Vermont, a couple miles south of the Canadian border. I should have gotten my winter jacket out of the back of my jeep before I stepped out, but I left balmy North Carolina at 70 degrees and the brief stops I made along the way didn’t require it. If there was any sleepiness in me before, that is completely dissipated by the blast of wind that hits me square in the face. Technically, we just ed the vernal equinox, but it doesn’t look like spring has sprung here, nor does it look imminent. More like, winter has not yet departed. Not that I mind, since I want to try my hand at skiing, for the first time ever. It would have made sense for me to have checked the weather before I left home, but sometimes my impulsive side takes over the decision-making process, and I was in a hurry to get up here. Pulling my hoodie tighter to me, I walk around my jeep to the fuel pump, catching a glimpse of an extremely tall, broad shouldered man across from me. The wind takes this moment to catch my hair and viciously rend it across my face, as my eyes lock with the sensuous, molten gaze of the most strikingly handsome man I have ever laid eyes on. God have mercy on my soul. I catch my breath and glance down at my borrowed boots, making sure I don’t trip over the concrete island between us. Player or taken, logic brain informs me. Logic or not, he is sinfully fine, all chiseled cheeks and stubbly jawline, and well dressed for the weather, a sign of intelligence. Drives an expensive truck, that’s an indication of someone who works hard. Other hard things come to mind, playing hard, there’s that. Nope. Player or taken. Logic brain is frequently a killjoy. Maybe I was imagining that he was staring at me. Ignoring the phone jangling in my pocket, I reach for the handle of the fuel hose and insert it into my jeep’s tank, distractedly not realizing that I should have swiped my card first. Logic is overruled by instinct, and my gaze impulsively flicks to Mr. Handsome, as I wait

for the fuel to dispense. I get a jolt, as I realize he’s staring, his dark, shrewd eyes clearly fixed in my direction. Stupidly, my heart does a flip flop, my cheeks reddening under his scrutiny, as the ferocious wind takes my hair and relentlessly whips it across my face. I drop gaze to my oversized, black steel-toes, my heart beginning to hammer in my chest, like a gazelle under the watchful gaze of a ravenous lion. I want to look at him again, but my phone keeps ringing. For the second time, I hit the side button, and it stops the noise. I risk another look at him. His attention is on placing the fuel nozzle back in its slot, but it immediately comes back to me, and my heart jumps again. That was deliberate. He wants to catch me looking at him. He stares at me in a more pointed way this time, as if to say, make sure you know that I caught you looking at me. Time comes to a standstill for a moment as I get sucked into those eyes. Dark demon like eyes that don’t miss anything in their environment. There’s an essence about him that exudes power and confidence, and potentially perilous aggression, giving me the impression that if there was something before him that he wanted, he would take it. He doesn’t break his gaze with me and neither does he smile flirtatiously or anything, just stares at me with hunger in his eyes. Studies me like a predator would, and that thought, for some reason, sends a curious thrill down my spine. My phone goes off for the third time, and I realize that the pump is not accepting my credit card for whatever reason. Reluctantly, I break eye lock with the handsome stranger and begin to walk towards the convenience shop, sliding my finger across my phone to accept the incoming call. “Mom, I told you already. I’ll be fine.” Do not. I repeat, do not, send someone to check on me.” My exasperation rises as my mother’s insistent voice broadcasts though my cell phone. Crossing the service station at a snappy pace, I try to ignore the bitterly cold wind swirling around me. My mother is a perpetual ‘fixer’ and sensing that I might be in over my head in this northern clime far from home and about to experience my first ever, real life blizzard, she’s been calling around the area to

see if any of Nana’s old friends can offer me assistance. “Anna, darling, I already asked, the Bennett’s will stop by the cabin to check in with you. I don’t think Nana’s cabin is equipped for a blizzard. You will be out in the middle of nowhere by yourself, what if you lose power? Nana didn’t have a generator as far as I’m aware.” “Mom! There’s a fireplace. Now, stop worrying, I can handle it all myself. I have to go.” It was a 16-hour drive from North Carolina to Vermont, and I’m counting down the stops before I can reach my newly inherited log cabin. Beat and annoyed, I head inside to pay, hoping that my credit card doesn’t give me any more trouble. It is. “I’m sorry, you’re going to have to pay in cash.” The service attendant, sporting pink frosted hair tips, a lip piercing and cracking a large wad of gum looks at me expectantly. She doesn’t look a bit sorry for this at all. I quickly begin to rummage through my purse. “I don’t understand why my card won’t work here.” The attendant shrugs her shoulders. My face heats, as a giant line begins to form behind me. I suppose everyone wants a fill up before the blizzard hits full force. I really should have gotten more cash out of the bank before I drove up here. “All I have is a five.” It’s not going to get me up and down the mountain. “Is there an ATM around here?” She cracks her gum and looks at my five. “The nearest ATM is that way about 5 blocks. I’m not sure if the ATM is working right now. Do you want five dollars in gas?” I sigh and brush my hair off my face. “Yes. Sure.” “Here.” The handsome dude, that I was eyeing moments ago at the pump, steps forward and lays a fifty-dollar bill on the counter. Blood rushes to my face. My eyes search upwards towards the face of a-godcome-to-earth, who has just offered to help me out. Oh. Wow. He does smile.

His laugh lined eyes search mine with such kindness, that momentarily I’m speechless, my irritation dropping away like mist parting before the morning sun. “Long way from home?” He smiles at me, and my heart skips a beat. Obviously, he’s been listening in on the conversation and my southern drawl. My pulse ramps, and my face continues to heat against my will. “I am, but you don’t have to do this. I’m sure there’s an ATM around here somewhere.” “Don’t worry about it, I insist.” His deep voice emanates a rugged sexiness and has the trace of what sounds like a Russian accent. I hesitate. People continue to stare, and my cheeks indicate that an inferno has been ignited at the surface of my skin. I hate it when I blush like this in front of a bunch of people. “Thank you so much.” My voice sounds higher than normal, as I thank him. “My pleasure.” A wave of lightheadedness es over me at the masculine rumble of his voice. The blush stays with me until I get back into my jeep. It isn’t till I get there, that I realize I have completely lost my manners. I should have asked him his name and offered to pay him back, but I’d been too flustered to even think of it. Hands shaking slightly, I insert the key in the ignition, sit back and exhale. The mystery man leaves the store, holding the door open for an attractive woman in a designer coat and boots. Self-consciously, I run a hand though my hair and look down at my paint splattered skinny jeans, wool socks, and engineer treads that I borrowed from my friend’s brother that are about 3 sizes too big. No wonder that man took pity on me, I look like hell. I guess that was why he was staring at me. I’ve only slept for about a half an hour in the last 18 hours. Not that it matters anyway, I didn’t ask him his name, and by the looks of it, he probably has a wife or a girlfriend. My gaze stays on him and the pretty lady. The pair are in deep conversation, and then the woman touches the sleeve of his coat in an affectionate gesture. I look away, not wanting to be caught staring at them. What am I thinking

anyway? I’m here for a vacation. There isn’t time to begin a relationship. But something stirs inside me, something I haven’t felt in a long time. Pushing aside thoughts of the generous mystery man, I grudgingly turn back to business at hand. I need to call the credit card company and find a bank, in addition to all the other things I need to get before I head up to Nana’s cabin. Shifting my car into gear, I pull out of the gas station and onto the main road, watching the mystery man and lady in my rearview mirror. The snow, which had merely been flurries at the station is beginning to fall harder, and I turn on my wipers so I can see. It starts to lay on the road, as I meander around the city of Newport, looking for the closest bank with an ATM. An hour later, I finish with banking and shopping for supplies. A forty-fiveminute drive to my cabin lies ahead, and I turn the dial on the radio searching for an update on the weather. I find one. “Looks like we’re gonna get a big one folks. The National Weather Service is calling for record snowfalls, as much as 48 inches. Don’t go out if you don’t have to and keep warm. Stay with us for updates.” My phone buzzes. I’m expecting it to be my Mom, and I answer without looking at the incoming number, so that I can keep my eyes on the road. “Mom.” My tone is sharp. She needs to relax and stop bugging me. A sweet-sounding voice is on the other end of the line. “No, I’m afraid not dear. This is Emma Bennett. Is this Anna Anderson?” “Yes, this is Anna.” “Anna, I’m an old friend of your Grandmother’s. Your mother just called me to say that you will be in the area for a while, and my husband Harold and I were wondering if you would like to stay with us for a few days until the snow is cleared out. Your Grandmother’s cabin is quite a way out from town, and they don’t always plow the roads up there on the mountain. I know your mother is very worried about you, she said you have never been up north during the winter season. She rambles on, seeming to anticipate my thoughts. “And I know it’s officially spring, but up here, it can act like winter until May.” I know she means well, but my irritation rises at the mention of my meddling

mother. “I appreciate your invite Mrs. Bennett, but I’ll be fine. I have the fireplace if the power goes out.” “I thought as much. I can see that you take after your Grandmother. She was very independent too. I just want to warn you that if we get the 4 feet of snow that the weatherman is predicting that you may be stuck on the side of that mountain for days my dear.” “Please don’t worry about me. I have everything I need, and I’m alright with being alone. This is a vacation for me.” Emma pauses. “Okay dear. But just to humor an old lady, would it be alright if we sent a friend of the family by to check on you this afternoon?” It’s more of a statement than a question, I realize as Emma continues. “His name is Valentin Tsarev. We call him ‘the Tsar.’ It’s our nickname for him.” Mrs. Bennett chuckles, and I silently raise my eyebrows at the nickname. “It would make us feel so much better, if we knew you were safe during the storm.” “I don’t want to make anyone go out of their way for me Mrs. Bennett. I can assure you, I’ll be fine, really.” “Oh, it’s not out of his way at all, dear. He lives right up the road from you. He has a logging business on the mountain. You see? It’s no trouble at all,” she says cheerfully. “We already talked to him about you.” I try to leave the rising annoyance out of my voice. After all, Mrs. Bennett is simply being neighborly. But all I want right now is a hot shower and a nap. “I see. It’s not necessary, but if you insist. What time will he be stopping by?” “Later this afternoon dear.” “Thank you for calling Mrs. Bennett.” “You’re quite welcome. Please come and visit us after the storm has ed, we’d love to meet you.” “Of course, I look forward to meeting you.” I hang up and consider calling my mother to tell her to stop interfering, but instead, I allow my attention to drift to

the sight of the thick, gently falling snowflakes and the beauty of the snowcovered Green Mountains in the distance. When at last my jeep begins its long trek up the road that leads to Nana’s cabin, I inhale. The view is breathtaking. Enormous snow-covered pines line the path, and as I rumble down the road, a pond comes into view. I pull into the driveway of a cozy looking log cabin, cut the engine, and open my door to a big gust of wind. Tramping through the snow, I head for the cabin. My heart jumps in anticipation, I place the key in the lock and open the solid wooden door. A rustic wooden table with two chairs sits in the middle of a tidy little kitchen, and a few copper pots hang from the ceiling. There’s a cast iron griddle on the stove, and the sink is old fashioned, but I note with relief that is has a faucet with running water. There’s a small fridge and some dusty blue Wedgewood teacups on the corner shelf nearby. Anxious to see the rest of the house, I carry my large duffel bag into the tiny bedroom off the kitchen. The bedroom consists of a double bed, an antique trunk at the foot of the bed, a hand painted dresser in red, and a small army green nightstand on which stands a single dried rose in a crystal bud vase. I throw my duffel on the bed and place a large stack of reading material on top of the dusty nightstand. From the look of things, I’m going to have to give this place a solid cleaning before I settle in. The bathroom has an old-fashioned toilet, a claw footed tub, over which is a sky light, and a white porcelain sink with an oval mirror. The nicest room is the moderate sized living room with a large stone fireplace and hearth. A gigantic picture window allows me to take in the spectacular view of the mountains in the distance and the pond and snow-covered trees that sit below the level of the cabin. The walls are a warm cedar and contrast to the grey skies and snow, which continues to fall. I hug myself and feel a twinge of excitement shoot through me despite the long journey to get here. It’s perfect. No Wi-Fi, no cell service. Peace. I tie my unruly hair into a ponytail, crank the heat to warm the cabin, turn on my portable radio and set to work. First on the agenda is the bathroom, which I speedily scour while fantasizing about the long hot soak I’m taking after I finish with the rest of the house. Moving onto the living room, I peel the sheets off the

furniture, revealing a worn leather sofa and 2 tufted leather club chairs. The coffee table is made of natural polished wood on which sits some old National Geographic magazines and a faded ivory candle on a wooden plank. I pause at the fireplace mantel, looking at the cluster of family pictures. I smile as I look at the picture of Nana and Pop on their wedding day, an awful one of myself in second grade, sporting a toothless, crooked smile, my Mom and Stepdad on a cruise, and Uncle Jack in his Navy uniform. I reach for a picture of Nana in Peru. She lost Pop when she was 40, and after that she traveled a lot. I always ired her for being an adventurer. I hold her picture to my heart. “I miss you Nana.” As I speak, a shaft of sunlight breaks through the storm clouds and hits me in the face. I hold the picture and look at her face again, memories streaming in with the sun. “Live life on your own Anna.” Nana’s words come back to me. “I am Nana. At least. I’m trying too.” The sun disappears and the room darkens with the storm. I turn up the volume on the radio. Singing along to the music helps me work a little faster, and after I mop the wide planked wood flooring, I do a little dance in front of the picture window. “You never close your eyes anymore, when you kiss my lips.” My can of dusting polish becomes my microphone. Because, who cares? No one is here to see me look like a fool. A surge of happiness shoots through me. The place is starting to look spotless, and it’s so cozy. I love it! Tonight, I’m doing nothing but sitting by the fire and reading and relaxing. That’s my plan anyway.

Chapter 3

Anna While waiting for the tub to fill, I strip off my ratty jeans and t-shirt and throw a handful of salt crystals into the tub. A cloud of steam arises from the bath, and I sink gratefully into the tub, enjoying the steamy heat against my skin. My muscles start to unknot themselves, and I lie back and close my eyes, daydreaming. At last. It’s so peaceful here. Not a sound, except for the swish of the wind blowing through the pines outside the log walls, and the indiscernible sound of snow gently falling on the tin roof. Lifting my feet to the edge of the tub, I scoot my body forward, and allow the hot water to soak into my scalp. Snowflakes drift over the skylight and I get lost in a stare, mesmerized by the beauty. Thoughts idling, I wonder how my business partner is making out. I trust Tim, he’s a capable person, and lucky. Tim and his wife have the perfect little family, in love with each other and their new baby. Not to be left out of the thought parade, my inner cynic injects her own thought. Dream on Anna. What Tim and Mia have belongs in a fairy tale. After my last breakup, well, so much for fairy tales. Amid my reverie, I’m lifted from delicious solitude by a loud knock at the kitchen door. OMG. I forgot that Mrs. Bennett’s friend was going to stop by. Crap. It’s gotta be ‘the Tsar.’ I’d love to disregard it, as the timing can’t be more inconvenient. But if I ignore it, he’ll probably speak with the Bennett’s, who’ll speak with my mother and then who knows what will happen? Knowing my mother, she’ll call the police. Not to mention, it’s obvious I’m here because my jeep is parked outside, and since I already told Mrs. Bennett that it’s okay for the man to stop by, I better get up. Otherwise, I risk being rude to my new neighbors. “Awesome timing.” I mutter. The knocking becomes a pounding. “I’m coming.” I yell, wondering if the man can even hear me through the thick walls. The last thing I want to do is get out of this steamy bath. My dirty clothes lie mangled on the floor, and I make the hasty decision against throwing them back on, maybe it will give him a strong hint that I’m otherwise occupied.

My mother’s voice resounds in my head, “Now Anna, , good southern girls always dress for company, no matter who it is.” Screw that. I’m on vacation. And I’m lacking sleep, and clearly, manners. I hastily throw my bath towel around me, stride to the door, and fling it open, expecting a much older man than the one that stands before me wielding an enormous bouquet of flowers and eyeing me with a bemused expression. My heart literally skips a beat. I grip the door handle for assistance, feeling like the impulsive idiot that I sometimes am. Here before me is the ruggedly handsome dude from the gas station who I had some serious eye lock with and who generously paid for my fuel. Momentarily confused, I clutch my towel for , as my body, traitor that it is, sends a blush traveling over every inch of my skin. The name Emma Bennett gave me had sounded Russian, and this man has a Russian accent. Therefore, it is highly likely that ‘the Tsar’ is standing before me. Without thinking, I cheekily cock an eyebrow at him and blurt out, “You’re the Bennett’s friend, ‘the Tsar’ I presume?” He gives me a sexy smile, “Obviously, you’ve spoken with Emma.” “She warned me,” I smile, oblivious to the cold and feeling like my annoyance has dissipated at the sound of his deep, accented voice. “And you’re my new neighbor, Ms. Anna Andersen. I did not realize this earlier, or I would have introduced myself at the gas station.” “Yes. Please call me Anna. Thank you again. That was exceedingly kind of you. I’ll pay you back.” He glances at my towel, an apologetic expression on his face. “Not necessary. But I’ve come at an inconvenient time. I would have called, but Emma said you don’t have a phone installed. I’ll stop by later.” Whoa. He’s assertive. He isn’t asking. The memory of the eye lock experience at the gas station returns, he struck me as a man not afraid to go after what he wants. But now he’s all charming and such. Hmmm.

“It’s not necessary, really. I’m fine. I’m sorry to have wasted your time. The Bennett’s are worried for nothing.” His dark eyes assess me with a frankness that makes me feel naked. He’s looking at me like I’m an unnatural specimen that doesn’t belong out here in this seeming wilderness, as though I need protection from myself. “I’ll stop by later Anna.” The low rumble of his masculine voice and the forcefulness of his demeanor sends a tingling sensation straight to my belly. “These are for you. Welcome to the neighborhood.” He hands me an exotic bouquet of multicolored blooms. I reach for the bouquet, making a grab for my towel, as it slides dangerously towards my backside. Another blush rushes across my cheeks as our fingers graze each other. “Thank you, these are beautiful, but I don’t know if I’ll be here later.” “You’re welcome. I’ll see you around 4 Anna. If you’re still here that is. I have a proposal for you.” He calls over his shoulder to me as he heads for his truck. I shut the door against the swirling snow, plop the flowers onto the kitchen table and watch his truck drive down the road. A strange mixture of feelings swirl through my body. Who is this man? Insistent, forceful. Handsome as hell. Not like anyone I’ve ever met in the south. Probably married, engaged or with someone. The woman dressed to the nines at the gas station seemed friendly with him. I assure myself that the only reason he’s returning is to satisfy the Bennett’s that I’m okay. The proposal means he is probably going to try and convince me to stay with the Bennett’s during the storm. But that’s my luck. My friend Rachel claims it’s because I have a tainted view of men. Of course, we did do some intense staring at the gas station, but… Scenes from what seem like a lifetime ago flash before my gaze. Jason, my former boyfriend, turning in shock as I enter his apartment. Him naked, mounting a girl from behind on the sofa near the door. The sofa we’d made out on. The shock wave that came over me with the realization that he was fucking someone else on the day that I was ready to have sex with him for the first time. Wearing nothing but the sexiest set of black lingerie under my trench coat and a

pair of stilettos, I ran out of the apartment, hearing Jason’s rueful voice calling my name. All the planning to make it the best ever. I’d wanted everything to be perfect for our first time. I wanted to surprise him. Well, it sure as hell did. It was humiliating. From that point on, I’d barely looked at guys, but it made me driven enough to start my own business with one of my best friends and depressed enough to lose the extra forty pounds I’d been carrying around since my parent’s divorce. Returning to the present, I stare at the flowers. They’re gorgeous. When is the last time I received flowers like this from a man? Never, honestly. Not like this. They’re so artfully arranged, I’m sure they come from a flower shop. Leaning over the arrangement, I pluck out the attached note. Dear Anna, Please accept this welcome to Vermont. Your Grandmother was a wonderful neighbor, and she is missed by all in these parts. Do not hesitate to ask if there is any assistance you might need. Best Regards, Valentin Tsarev I gape at the note, wondering about the man I’ve just met. He is a gentleman. Older than me, the laugh lines around his eyes betray that fact. But, for an older man, he is quite nice to behold. I remind myself that a man like this is most likely not single. Not that I care. I’ve sworn off the male gender. For my own good, of course. The staring incident? Maybe he thought I looked like hell because, I did. Who doesn’t after being cooped up in a car for 16 hours? I return to the tub. The water is still hot, but I top it off with more until all I can see is a haze of steam. Closing my eyes, I review the shock I felt when I opened the door. I’d been expecting a rough old, grizzled mountain man, not the bold figure that stood before me with the piercing eyes and commanding features. He is amazing to behold, more so because he seems like a genuinely kind person. I remind myself that I saw him talking with a beautiful woman. Not only that, his reason for returning is benign, likely due to the Bennett’s via my mother’s request.

My logical self tells me to stop fantasizing and that the best course of action is to make sure that I’m not here when he returns. There isn’t going to be anymore pestering about me being able to stay in this lovely little cabin while the storm rides itself out. End of story. And I’m not going to allow myself to feel a crazed attraction for him, despite the staring between us. He’s overtly bold and pushy. And kind, my better side speaks up, and then the devil side wins out. Forget it, it whispers. I lather myself up, wash my hair, and shave off the stubble. Stepping out, I leave a trail of water droplets across the floor and towel off in front of the fire. It’s so refreshing to be clean. I sit naked on the fur rug and enjoy the warmth of the fire on my bare back. The snow falls thickly out of a slate gray sky, intensely beautiful. Once I’m warm and dry, I cream my legs and slip into my favorite old jeans, a black T shirt, hoodie, and a pair of fuzzy socks. Glad for the engineer boots I borrowed, I throw on my jacket and head to the shed for more wood. It takes me about an hour to stack enough wood next to the fireplace to feel satisfied that I won’t be needing anymore for several days. Then, I bring the shovel into the kitchen, thinking it might be handy if the snow piles up near the door. My tasks finished, I check my cell for the time, noting the no service icon. 3:33 PM. Time to head out before the Tsar gets back. Rummaging around, I find tape and an envelope, and set about writing a thank you note to the Tsar with $50 included. I tape it to the inside door of the kitchen, grab my jacket and winter things, and head for my Jeep. I’ll take a drive, find a place to pull over, and hike. Oddly enough, I can hear my friend Rachel’s voice making a clucking sound in my head. Rachel would not approve, she’d bug me to take a chance, but I’m not taking a chance on someone that most certainly has a special someone, especially when I’m only here for a few weeks. It’s extraordinarily gorgeous, the thickly frosted pines and deeply drifted snow make it look like an enchanted forest. Quite a change from the southern climate I’m used to in North Carolina. We rarely get snow that far south. This is something I always wanted to see when I was a kid. I direct my Jeep down the snow-covered dirt road that runs past the cabin. After a short drive, I find an overlook, pull off the road and park my Jeep. The wind is picking up, and it bites at my cheeks, as I get out of the shelter of my vehicle and

head down the road. Snow lies thickly on the road surface, only visible in a few bare patches where the wind has sliced it away. Determinedly, I trudge along, pausing to take pictures of the winter wonderland before me. A logging truck rumbles past, and the driver waves and nods at me like he knows me. After 30 minutes of walking, a sign looms ahead of me. Tsarev Logging Company, Inc. Surprised, I make a hasty U turn towards my Jeep. I’ve been trying to avoid the man, not run into him! As I turn, the wind catches at my face, taking my breath away. Somehow, the walk back towards my Jeep feels much colder than the walk away from it. A red Chevy pickup es me, followed by two cars. Probably workers, I think, maybe leaving early because of the storm. Five minutes later, a black F-450 pulls alongside. My pulse begins to race, I recognize the truck. The window lowers, and the Tsar’s handsome face appears, looking amused. Does he think I’m here to check him out? “Enjoying the weather Anna?” Brows lift, dark eyes absorb me, head to foot. For some stupid reason, the second I look at him, I trip on a chunk of ice, twisting my ankle in the process, and fall headlong into the road. Pain flashes through my ankle, as I lie sprawled out like a roadkill. Are you kidding me right now? Why in God’s name did I have to fall in front of a man that looks at me like that? The Tsar stops his truck, jumps out and swiftly moves to my side. I pull myself to a sitting position, feeling incredibly awkward and stupid. It’s these damned oversized boots. That and the feeling that I’m going to faint every time I have an encounter with this man. “Anna, are you alright?” He touches my arm gently. My face flushes crimson, and it isn’t the cold. “I’m OK, I just twisted my ankle.” “I’m going to lift you up. Put your arm around my neck.” I follow his instructions, expecting him to lift me to my feet, but he doesn’t bother with that option. His steely arms lift me and carry me to his truck.

Not that I’m a stick by any stretch of the imagination, but he moves with me as though I weigh next to nothing. Heart rate accelerating, I catch the heady, masculine scent of his cologne. Somehow, I’ve died and gone to heaven. He’s all man, from the hard sinews of his arms to the muscular frame of his body, that I can’t help but feel, despite the winter coats between us. He places me on the seat. “I’m going to drive you home and look at it.” “If you could please just drop me off at my Jeep, it’s down the road from here.” “I’ll have one of my men drive it home for you. I’ll call now. Here give me your keys.” “I can drive myself. It’s not far.” “No worries. We’re your neighbors, let us give you a hand.” I hand my keys to him, wondering if he is going to insist that I stay with the Bennett’s. Of course, he is. In the past four hours, he has been there to give me money, a neighborly greeting, and a lift in his truck. I look out of my element here, and I know it. I spend most of the ride back to the cabin wondering if the Tsar thinks I’m a complete idiot. The very thing I tried to avoid has happened. He pulls into the driveway. My Jeep follows, driven by one of his men, and another follows in a pickup. This is unbelievably embarrassing. Expecting to hobble into the house on my own, I get ready to slide out of the truck, my cheeks flaming scarlet from all the attention. The Tsar is quicker, and he scoops me off the seat into his arms, and heads for the kitchen door. I thank the men that have returned my Jeep, feeling my face heat into what I am sure looks a four-alarm inferno, when the Tsar refuses to put me down. He insists on carrying me inside and gives me a surprised look when I tell him that door is unlocked. “You shouldn’t leave your house unlocked.” He chastises me, as he sets me on the kitchen chair, pulling the other one under my bad ankle. “Even though it is rather desolate around here, there have still been the occasional break-ins. It’s not safe for a woman alone.” He looks into my eyes, searching to see if I am taking him seriously.

“I really do know how to take care of myself, Valentin.” I give him an exasperated sigh, preparing for him to suggest that I stay elsewhere during the storm. He laughs, and then says with a twinkle in his eye, “Is that why you fell in front of my truck, because you were taking care of yourself?” “Thanks for that. I was having a clumsy moment. Alright, laugh. Yes, it was funny.” “I’m teasing you.” He pulls up a chair and gently takes my foot in his strong, capable looking hands. “I think we should take a look at your ankle.” He pulls off my boot and sock and looks from my boot to my foot, giving me a knowing smile. “Your boyfriend’s?” My cheeks flush at the question. “No. I borrowed them from my friend’s brother. He has big feet.” “Compared to yours, yes. Good God woman. No wonder you tripped.” He chuckles as he probes my ankle gently with his fingers. I can’t help but notice how large his hands are. “Ow! That’s the spot.” “You’re lucky, I think it is not sprained, just badly bruised. Do you have ice or frozen peas?” “No.” I look at him ruefully. “I wasn’t expecting to need it.” “Ziploc bags?” “Yeah.” I point to the cupboard. The Tsar grabs one, heads outside and fills it with snow and places the snow filled baggie on my ankle. “That should help with the swelling.” “Thank you, neighbor,” I give him a cautious smile, amazed at how kind he is, but waiting for his ‘proposal’. It’s coming, I know it is. He’s a considerate man, he’d probably offer to drive me to the Bennett’s and pick me up if I asked. “My pleasure.” He gives me a warm look that sends tingles up my spine.

“And you wanted to ask me something?” He gives me an apologetic look. “Anna, I think you should stay with the Bennett’s until the storm is over. That way I will know you are safe.” There it is. I pegged it. “Absolutely not, I am perfectly fine here on my own.” “It’s not uncommon for the power to go out on this mountain during snowstorms, and you’ll be left without heat. “ “I thought of that. But I brought enough wood in for the fireplace to last at least two days.” “Anna, the power could be out for a week. And you will not be able to bathe either.” The corners of his eyes crinkle with his smile, and I feel sure he is ing me standing at the door in a towel. “Valentin, I appreciate your concern, but I am fine here by myself. Seriously.” “If I can’t convince you to stay with the Bennett’s would you at least agree to coming with me to dine at my home tonight?” My heart feels like it’s going to leap out of my chest. “You can meet Señora Madora and have one good meal before you are forced to cook over your fireplace for a week. She is the best cook on this side of the mountain.” My heart does a dive at the mention of Señora, but judging by the look on his face, he isn’t going to take ‘no’ for an answer. “What time?” “I’ll bring you there now. It will save you straining your ankle further.” I’m amazed, I’ve never met such a determined man. He’s obviously used to getting his way. “You like to get your way, don’t you?” “I do. I am known as ‘the Tsar’ by my friends for a reason.” I see the gleam in his eye when he says this, and I laugh despite myself. “Mrs.

Bennett mentioned that. You are a wicked Tsar?” I cock an eyebrow at him. “Sometimes, but only when necessary.” His dark eyes, momentarily serious, examine my lighter ones, sending an electric jolt down my spine. It reminds me of the predatory look he gave me at the gas station. He turns away, his attention focused out the window. “We should go, it’s starting to get dark, and I told Señora Madora we would be back for dinner.” “You told her I was coming?” “I felt confident that I could persuade you, and I was reasonably sure that you would not agree to stay at the Bennett’s. Emma told me that you are very much like your grandmother, an independent woman.” My mouth drops open. Firstly, I thought him arrogant, but he sounded complimentary of my Nana, and that gives me a warm, liquid feeling inside my heart. He is full of surprises. “I’m going to carry you to my truck. Don’t try to fight me.” He gives me a wary look that contains a little smile. A little fluttering sensation kicks around in my belly. He is entirely charming and forceful, and he knows it. “Put your arm around my shoulders,” he commands. My heart rate accelerates, as I place my arm around his neck and his arms encircle me. His scent and the strength of his body are intoxicating to my senses. The temptation to run my fingers over the dark stubble of his jawline hits me full force, commanding other parts of my body to respond at the pleasurable images that are running through my brain. With a sigh, I give myself into his steely hold and allow myself to be carried to his truck. He places me on the seat, and I discreetly watch him as he walks around and slides into the driver seat. “Thank you for everything Valentin.” “You’re welcome Anna.” A thrill runs through my entire body as he looks into

my eyes. The truck rumbles to life under his touch, and we head up the hill to his home. The snow swirls around the truck, enclosing us into what feels like a cave inside the cab. On the drive to his home, I finally gather enough courage to ask, “Is Señora Madora your wife?” “Heavens no!” That brings a laugh from him, though I notice that for a split second, pain seems to on his face at the word ‘wife’. “Señora Madora runs the household. You’ll like her Anna, she’s got a heart of gold, and she knows how to cook.” “She’s your maid?” “I don’t think of her that way. She is like family, like a mother figure to me and my men. It works out well.” A barely discernible Tsarev Logging sign appears out of nowhere on the left. It’s getting hard to see anything at a distance. A road turns off to the left just past the sign. We continue our ascent. Ten minutes later, he turns the wheel to the left and follows a long road to his house. How he’s able to see anything, I’m unsure. To my eyes, the road and the landscape are one continuous blur of white. The mansion is a massive log and stone, three story structure. Double doors stand at the entrance, and wide paned glass windows cover the house. Cypress trees in iron planters stand on either side of the doorway. A smaller but elegant house stands off to the left. Immense maples and pine trees ring the properties. The front door opens, and I see an older, beautiful, dark skinned woman standing there, beaming, and waving. Señora Madora. Valentin opens the enger door and scoops me up into his arms before I can protest. The feel of his warm strong arms, his hard body pressed into mine, and the scent of him inebriate my senses. I warn myself to stop, there is not going to be anything between us, there can’t be for many reasons. But my body has a will of its own, my pulse races and the light headedness returns. The snow swirls around us as we make our way to the house, Valentin shouting to the Señora for an ice pack. She disappears into the house, leaving the door wide open for us to enter.

As he crosses the threshold with me, his eyes meet mine and with a devilish smirk, he says the exact thing that has just crossed my mind, “This is like a man with his bride, eh?” I allow my eyes to connect with his momentarily, and then I drop them, feeling the heat of an entire body blush wash over me, as tingles of electric energy spark from my navel to my thighs. He must know the effect he has on me; my heart is thumping like it’s going to burst out of my chest. Fortunately, I am rescued by Señora, who bustles into the Hall with a concerned look on her face. “Everything is ok?” She asks with a heavy Spanish accent. I open my mouth to respond, but the Tsar is quicker. “She hurt her ankle, I’m going to give her a chair in the sitting room until dinner is ready.” He talks, as he strides into the sitting room, and deposits me on the leather sofa that sits opposite of a stone fireplace. He gently lifts my sore ankle onto the leather Ottoman and takes the ice pack from Señora. Placing it on my ankle, he introduces me to the woman. “Anna, this is Señora Madora. Señora Madora, this is Anna.” A look es between them that I cannot read, and then Señora bends down to shake my hand, looking incredibly pleased. “My Tsar has brought home an Angel.” He replies to Señora Madora, though, his dark eyes burn into mine, “This one’s a fallen Angel, Señora Madora, she fell right in front of my truck.” Another body blush comes over me, and I force myself to break my eye lock with Valentin to look at Señora Madora, “That’s kind of you to say. Thank you for having me. I’m sorry to trouble you.” “It is no problem.” Señora waves her hands. “He never brings home a woman. I always tell him, ‘I love to cook. Bring someone home’. But he never does.” She rolls her eyes and looks upwards. “Thank God, finally, my prayers have been answered.” “Señora, when will dinner be ready?” Valentin interrupts her rant. It makes me wonder if he is slightly embarrassed, though he shows no signs of flushing. “A half an hour or so. Do you like salmon?” She asks me.

“I love anything that I don’t have to cook myself.” Señora looks from me to the Tsar, “I like her.” I smile and Señora swishes out of the room, singing a little Spanish song to herself. “Would you like a drink before dinner?” Valentin offers. “I have a very good pinot grigio.” “That sounds good. Yes, I’d love one.” Valentin leaves, and I scan the richly furnished room. An oil painting of a sailing ship in a stormy sea hangs over the fireplace. Two model ships stand on either side of the mantle, as well as a large piece of coral and some giant seashells. Leather club chairs flank the fireplace, and a rug made of what could be alpaca fur gives a warm field to the sitting area. The walls are a rich red color, and the stone of the fireplace spans the entire wall. A fire burns cheerfully in the grate. My brain takes in the luxurious surroundings and the man responsible for them. I it to myself that I am surprised by the intensity of my attraction to this man, especially because I have had a cynical streak about most men since my last breakup. Thoughts war inside me. What if Valentin has ulterior motives? Of course, he does. He was flirting with me. If he weren’t attracted to me, he wouldn’t have made the comment he did when he carried me over the threshold. I must be careful. He’s a man used to getting what he wants. I get that vibe from him. Some sass part of my brain chirps in with, and what do you want Anna? Good question.

Chapter 4

Valentin Fragrant smells emanate from the kitchen. I reach for the bottle of wine on the granite countertop and a couple of glasses. Señora Madora is prepping the salads, but looks over at me, and gives me a smile that speaks volumes. “I know you want to say something Señora Madora.” “She’s here. And she’s beautiful just like I told you she’d be. But the outside is the facade. It’s the inside, the fire in her, that you will fall for.” I shake my head and give her a half smile. I’m not about to tell her that I feel the heat of attraction with Anna, but I know she knows. “You don’t believe me, but you will. She gives you a baby.” There’s a stubborn look on her face. I know she wants to believe that for me because she loves me. “You’re too much Señora Madora. You know that’s impossible for me.” A stabbing pain grips my heart from the mere thought, but I push it away. Facts are facts. “Things are not impossible in the Spirit world, Valentin. Trust me, I know these things.” She turns her back to me and begins singing a song in Spanish. Thankfully, my guest is too far away to hear this snippet of conversation I’ve just had with Señora Madora. I love my caretaker, but she’s a handful and then some. She’s either half-cracked or she does have a relationship with the Spirit world. I suspect it may be a little of both. “Señora.” She turns, dark eyes twinkling. “Yes, Valentin?” “God help you and your spirit friends should you decide to tell Ms. Andersen anything that you’ve said to me.” “Don’t worry Valentin. There is no need to say anything to Anna. The person that needed to hear it, is you. Because you are a blockheaded man, too caught up in your own head and not willing to trust again. That is why I had to give you the

messages from Spirit. It is because you are stubborn. And you needed hope. I know of the pain you hide.” Shaking my head at her, I place the wine and glasses with some cocktail napkins on a tray. She may have a point, I’ve been told by family that I’m stubborn, but the finest medical doctors in the country told me I will never be a father, and that is that. The description and timing of Anna is right on, though, it could have been a lucky guess. I’m not privy to the inner workings of Señora’s mind. “It wasn’t a lucky guess, Valentin.” “Stop reading my mind Señora.” She laughs when I narrow my eyebrows at her. “Promise you won’t say anything to her.” “I promise nothing. I have my own free will. But there’s nothing I could do to change the future. It is fated for you both in this regard.” “We make our own fate Señora Madora.” “Choose to believe what you will.” Her lips curve into a little smile, as she continues to prepare our meal. I walk the hallway towards the sitting room, aware that the storm winds are intensifying. How is it that Señora Madora was right about a woman from ‘way down south’ as she had told me a year ago? Said she’d soon come into my life during a snowstorm and basically upend it. Said this woman would be my new neighbor, a beautiful blond, blue eyed young woman. If I’m honest with myself, I must it it’s weird that she got some things right. But Anna has yet to upend my life, and I’m just doing an old friend a favor. At least that’s what I’ve been telling myself. Emma Bennett called me and told me that Anna’s mother was very worried. Said she needed me to help her, and I intend to honor my friend’s wishes. I’ll make sure Anna is protected from the storm. Our dinner needs to last long enough for her to realize that she’s snowed in and must ride out the storm at my mansion. A

harmless thing to do to keep her safe. Unfortunately for Anna, she may have just walked into the wolf’s lair. Anna is studying the oil painting above the mantel when I return. Despite the fact, that she’s attracted to me, she seems guarded. Perhaps she’s in a relationship. I hand her a glass of wine and take a seat in one of the club chairs nearby. “Thanks.” Anna sips at the wine. “This is delicious.” “I’m glad you like it, it’s one of my favorites.” “Is it Italian?” “Yes. It’s from a vineyard of one of my friends.” “Nice. You have an international flair? Your name is Russian, your cook is Spanish, and your wine Italian.” “I like domestic products as well, Anna.” I wait to see her reaction. She seems nervous and cautious but doesn’t miss my innuendo. Anna blushes, her gaze moving to her wine glass and then back to my lips before returning to fix boldly onto mine. I allow my gaze to drift across her sensuous, soft, plump lips, red as her fiery cheeks, before I return to her luminous eyes, framed with black lashes. My cock twitches. What a combination, blushing and bold at the same time. I like what I see. There’s a defiance in her eyes, a liveliness. I rest my jaw on the edge of my fingertips and continue to study her. She unzips her hoodie, allowing me to see what I already know, that she’s flushed everywhere. “I like your oil painting.” “Thank you. That’s my father’s ship. He was a sea captain.” “Really? That’s interesting. Who is the artist?” “My mother.” “Wow. She’s amazing.”

“She was.” At that moment, Señora Madora appears and announces that dinner is ready. “I thought you might want to eat in here by the fireplace, so I have prepared your food on two trays. Would that be acceptable?” She asks us in her cheerful, accented voice. “Excellent idea, Señora. I’ll help you.” My gaze brushes Anna’s before I exit the room. Our eyes tango together, as she brushes a silky lock of flaxen hair off her face. She’s into me. That’s a good thing, because when this meal is over, she might want to hate me. Señora Madora appears to be on cloud nine. I need to nip her enthusiasm in the bud before she blurts out one of her ‘predictions’ to Anna. “Don’t say anything to Anna.” Señora Madora remains her cheerful self. “I know what you’re planning. I have prepared a room for her on the first floor.” She picks up a tray. “How did you? Never mind.” I pick up the other tray of food. Work was so busy that I hadn’t gotten a chance to ask her. “You could say ‘thank you’.” The woman is impossible. It’s probably why I love her so much. She’s also been right in her ‘predictions’ before, and I can’t help but wonder about the one she made about Anna. “Thank you Señora Madora. Help me out, I don’t think she’ll be very happy with me when she realizes that I’m not going to return her home tonight.” “She won’t be happy initially. But you’ll find a way around that.” Señora Madora gives me a mysterious smile.

Chapter 5

Anna All the wine sipping has left me with a nice buzz, no doubt from an empty stomach. The pair returns carrying two trays laden with food. There are grilled salmon filets, stuffed with rice, baby asparagus coated in butter, a green salad splashed with oil and vinegar, a crusty hunk of French bread, and small bowls of raspberries. “This looks incredible, Señora Madora. Thank you so much.” “You’re quite welcome, Anna.” Senora looks pleased. “Thank you, Senora,” adds the Tsar. She leaves us to our feast, and I dive into the meal with relish. The Tsar is true to his word about Senora being an excellent cook. This is one of the best meals I’ve ever eaten. He watches me with amusement. “I take it you’re not regretting coming here for dinner?” I laugh, “No regrets at all. I haven’t had a meal like this in ages.” “You don’t like to cook?” “I don’t know.” The wine loosens my tongue, I polish off my glass, and he pours me another. “Thanks.” I pause to take a sip, then continue, “I’ve been fairly busy since college. A friend of mine and I started a coffee shop after graduation. We started small, catering to mostly college kids, doing all the work ourselves in the beginning. It took working all hours and a couple years to break even, but we’ve finally been able to hire other people so we can have more of a life. Valentin looks at me with what appears to be iration. It gives me a warm happy glow inside. “You’re a businesswoman.” “Yes, I didn’t want a regular job, answering to a boss and all that. I wanted something different. Plus, I thought if the business did well, I would have time for art. I like to paint, and I’m hoping to be able to buy a fixer upper soon and

spend time on that. So, to answer your question, I’m not sure if I like to cook or not. I just haven’t had the time for it. I can make a mean southern biscuits and gravy. Other than that, pretty much it’s been peanut butter and hot dogs and spaghetti. Cheap and easy.” “And your business partner, he’s your boyfriend?” His fingertips align under his jaw, his molten stare making me feel like I could melt into him. There’s something magnetic about him, hypnotizing even. He’s solidly present and easily the most handsome man I’ve ever laid eyes on; I can’t help but feel attracted to him. The vein in my neck starts to pulse under his scrutiny. “No. He’s one of my best friends, we grew up on the same street. He has a wife and a new baby, that’s how I was able to take a leave of absence to come up here. He took six weeks off to help his wife with the baby, and he wanted to offer me the same.” “I’m fortunate that you have chosen this place to take a vacation.” He locks me into his gaze, the warmth of the corners of his eyes betraying a secret mirth that hides behind them. My heart begins to hammer in my chest, as unbidden thoughts of him and me… God, what am I thinking? Anna get a grip. “A woman as beautiful as you, surely must have a lover?” A shot of heat moves directly under my navel. What a bold question. My heart pounds and my cheeks bloom cherry pink. He’s smooth, much smoother than any guy I’ve ever dated in the South. But he’s probably like the rest. Despite the wine, I find that my cynical view of men remains intact. I’m not going to be a convenient one-night stand for this man. I don’t care that I have what seems like an animal attraction for him. Or that he looks at me like I’m dessert. Since Jason, I’ve remained guarded. Now here I am, two years later, more confident as a woman, but still unsure about the opposite sex. Damn shame too because you could be missing out on what’s right in front of you. My mind has a way of interjecting these thoughts, but it makes me pause for a second, and realize that I’ve kind of been stuck in the past, and maybe it’s time to move on. His eyes are like liquid pools drawing me to him. “I’m single. And incredibly happy about it.” Well, maybe that was a harmless

lie. I was happy, but now that I am experiencing this thing here with him? Whoa. I can’t believe what I’m thinking. I better nix the wine sipping. “I see.” What? He can read my mind? His gaze is intense. Yep, somehow, he knows. The old part of me that hates myself for dating Jason is still here, still feeling shame, even though he is the one that cheated. I change the subject, “How long have you lived up here? It’s such a beautiful place.” “It is beautiful. I’m not considered a ‘true Vermonter’, but I love it here. I’ve lived here for about ten years, before this I was in New York City with my family of origin.” “Where is your family now?” “My parents are deceased, they emigrated from Russia, so my aunts and uncles still live over there. Two of my brothers live on the East Coast, and one moved back to Russia. He lives near my grandmother. I have five nephews, no nieces yet. My wife died young; we had no children.” A shadow crosses his face. “I’m so sorry.” We sit in silence for a moment. I feel like I’ve touched on some sensitive subjects and feel bad for bringing it up, obviously, it’s still painful. Thankfully, Senora appears and breaks the silence. Cheerfully, she asks if we are ready for dessert. “I am so stuffed,” I protest. “And I should be heading home, if you don’t mind taking me.” I look over at the Tsar. “Señora Madora, I’ll take some please.” Senora leaves, and I stand up. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m sure the roads are getting slippery, and I don’t want you to get stuck out in the storm on my .” “The roads are slippery, Anna, too much so to head out.”

I look at him in disbelief. “I’ve got to go, you said you would take me back.” “I know what I said, but you would not have come with me otherwise, and I promised the Bennett’s I would look after you. Besides, you’re hurt.” “I’m not a child that needs looking after,” My tone is sharp, as I move towards my coat and hat. “Thank you for your hospitality, but please take me home now.” I shoot him a venomous look and make a hobbled break for the door. “Anna, please. Consider what you’re doing. You’re putting your life at risk. Señora Madora has prepared a room for you. It even has an extra-large tub for your bathing needs.” “You’re unbelievable.” A buzzing sensation begins to traverse the length of my spine. He planned this all along, and I’ve fallen for it. “I’ve never been told that, but I take it as a compliment.” Señora Madora enters with a tray of two desserts and coffees and flashes me an apologetic look. “Thank you, Senora, for a delicious meal. You’ve triumphed once again.” “You’re welcome.” Not wanting to seem like an ingrate, I add my thanks. The Tsar stands up and moves to the door. “Anna would you like Señora Madora to help you prepare for bed tonight?” “No, thank you I’m fine, and I would like to go home now.” “Anna, that is impossible with the weather. I’m sorry, but northern Vermont’s climate can be harsh. Mother Nature does not always do things our way. Tonight, she is forcing you to stay here with us.” My face flushes. He tricked me. Señora Madora turns towards me. “Please Anna. Stay. Don’t worry about anything. It is safe here. Nothing to worry about. There is a generator if we lose

power, and we will take care of you until your ankle is better.” “Thank you Señora Madora, you’re very kind.” “My pleasure.” She turns towards the Tsar. “Will you be needing anything else Valentin?” “Not tonight Senora.” “I’m going to retire. Goodnight Anna. I hope you will cook with me and my kitchen sometime.” “Goodnight, Señora Madora. Thank you for everything.” “You’re most welcome, Anna.” She gives the Tsar a secretive look and walks out of the room carrying the dinner trays. I begin to head towards the door. Valentin moves more quickly and takes a position directly in front of the door. “If you’re not willing to give me a ride, I’ll walk.” “That would not be wise with your injury. Please, see reason Anna.” “I appreciate your concern, but I can take care of myself.” I continue to move towards him, expecting him to step aside. He does not. “Thank you for having me in your lovely home for dinner.” “My pleasure.” His deep-set eyes search mine. I reach my hand towards him. He meets my handshake with a firm grip but does not move. The corners of his mouth are upturned in a smile, but the edges of his eyes do not crinkle. It is a battle of wills, and I can tell by his expression that he doesn’t intend to back down. “I’m going to go now.” “I’ll show you to your room.”

“I told you, I’m leaving.” By now, any man I’ve ever met would have given in to my demands, but not this man. “You can’t keep me here.” “I can, and I will Anna. You have no experience with these mountains.” “You said you would bring me home. You lied.” My heart thuds in my chest, and a vein in my temple pulses. He isn’t like any southern gentleman I’ve ever encountered. “It was necessary to make you believe that because you were incredibly determined to return to your home. I would have taken you to the Bennett’s earlier, but you refused that offer, and left me with no other choice. Hours have ed, Anna, the snow has piled up. It could be dangerous to drive in.” “You have 4-wheel drive.” “You are staying here Anna.” “Do you have another vehicle I could borrow?” “I do, but I’m not lending it to you.” My face glows red hot. “You can’t make me stay.” I glare up at him. “I’m making you stay.” “And if I walk out of the house?” “I’ll stop you.” He laughs at the expression that arises on my face at his response. Something akin to stubborn rage rises within me, at being told what to do. But there is no way I can physically overcome him; he’s a sizable man, built like a Mack truck. “You’re at a size disadvantage Anna.” “I’ll call the police on you.” “Friends of mine but go ahead.” He gestures to the phone. “They will tell you to stay put.”

An alternative plan is already formulating in my mind. I decide to pretend to play his game. “Fine, I’ll stay. Lead the way.” “I am glad you listened to reason Anna. Would you like dessert first?” He offers. “No, thanks.” My tone is curt. “As you wish.” The phone rings, and he moves to answer it. “Excuse me one moment Anna.” Perfect timing. His truck keys are conveniently within my grasp on the end table next to the chair he’s been sitting on. With a quick glance at the Tsar, I stealthily nab them and place them in my pocket, while he is preoccupied by the phone. He’s not going to dictate what I can and can’t do. I’ll wait till he retires for bed, and then I’ll take his truck. He has another vehicle. Probably more than one, judging by the size of the garage. It’s huge, just like his massive ego. Valentin gets off the phone, walks to where I’m seated, and offers his arm. “I thought a room on the ground floor would be acceptable, considering your leg.” “You’re too kind.” We make our way down the long hall, past elegant wall sconces protruding from stone walls. It reminds me of a medieval Castle, and I’m walking beside my prison guard. We reach the appointed room. He switches the light on for me and shows me the connecting bathroom. He’s right about the tub, it’s wide and deep, and has jets for a Whirlpool bath. If I weren’t so mad right now, I would probably be excited about it. The room itself is very spacious, the bed canopied, draped in a cream-colored material, and high enough to require a step. The spread matches and appears to be filled with down. At the bottom of the bed is a tufted bench, and on either side of the bed are mahogany nightstands with matching lamps. There is a phone on the stand closest to me. “Do you need anything, Anna?” I look up at him. He is more than a full head taller than I am and looks like he either chops wood or frequents the gym, maybe both.

“I’m fine.” There’s nothing more that I want than to show him that he will not control me, ever. I don’t care how sexy he is. “If you need anything in the night, you can call me or Señora Madora. Dial 1 for me, Senora is 3.” “What room is Senora in?” “She lives in the guest house.” “Oh.” “I’m sorry that you are disappointed in the outcome of this evening.” “I wouldn’t be if you hadn’t lied.” “The lesser of two evils.” “You’re incredibly arrogant.” He shrugs his shoulders, as if he could care less that I see him for who he really is underneath the strikingly handsome exterior. “I like a woman with fire.” An amused expression crosses his face. “Do the Bennett’s know about you?” “I told them you would be staying with me. I didn’t want them to worry. I believe they felt responsible for you.” “People around here do not need to be responsible for me.” “We are a small community. We look out for each other.”

Chapter 6

Anna He walks out of the room, closing the door behind him. I lean against it, listening to the sound of his footsteps as they retreat down the hall. After 10 minutes , I shut the lights out, and open the door with care. There’s not a sound. I move slowly, stopping to listen every few steps, wondering where his room is located. The sound of voices emanates from the sitting room, indicating he’s on the phone. Perfect. Ducking down, I creep to the front door, keys clutched to my chest. The double wide door is locked, and it makes a clicking sound, as I cautiously unlatch it. Opening the door slowly, I am unprepared for the gust of wind that meets me. The door leaps out of my hands like a demon in a rage, and slams with a loud ‘thunk’ into the house. I know I have only seconds. Racing towards the truck, limping slightly, I trip in my haste, and quickly get back up. “Anna!” He’s behind me now, shouting to me. Fumbling with the keys, I hit the unlock button for the door, and slip into the driver’s seat. It isn’t fast enough. The Tsar catches the door as I’m trying to shut it. I struggle against him, trying to remove his arm from the door. “Anna,” he says sharply. “Let me go!” I’m in a blind fury, kicking, and punching at him with all my might. The keys fall to the enger side floor. Straining to reach them, I kick at the Tsar with my good foot, trying to keep him out of the truck. Seeing what I’m after, he enters the truck, pinning me beneath him on the leather bench. His arms are longer, and he takes the keys, his body imprisoning mine beneath him. He holds my arms down, as I try desperately to free myself. Finally, I give up for the moment, sweating and panting. He looks down at me, a ruthless look on his face, “You’re a little vixen aren’t you? Trying to steal my truck.” “You lied to me.”

“A harmless lie for your own safety.” “Get off me.” “Not until you promise to stay here.” “I won’t promise.” “Then you will be sleeping in my room, and I’ll make sure that you say.” “You can’t do that.” “Watch me.” Keeping ahold of my hands, he moves them to a position behind my back and moves our bodies together to a sitting position. I try to fight him with my arms and legs, but he overpowers me. He slides me with him off the seat, holding me tightly. Keeping my arms behind my back, he forces his torso between my legs as his feet hit the ground. I find myself straddling him. His large hands cover mine, and he moves to push my bottom towards his body into a tight fit, so tight that I can’t help but feel his bulging cock press into my belly. Unable to release my hands from his grip, the most movement I can muster is a slight wriggling motion which only serves to send little pulses of pleasure to the juncture of my thighs, as I bump against his erection. “Let me go.” I pant, trying to catch my breath, my body at war between conflicting desires within me. My need to control and my sexual attraction for this beast of a man. The wind swirls around us, and I taste the cold wetness of the heavily falling snow on the cleft above my top lip, as I lick it away with my tongue. He watches me with amusement, as I stare at him with undisclosed rage. Never in my life have I met someone as ruthless as this man, baring my way from returning to my home away from home. Our breath comes out in cold puffs, mingling together within the heavily falling snow. He inhales deeply as he watches me, the depths of his eyes searching mine for a connection. He wants me, and it terrifies me. I have never felt an intensity of attraction like this before, maybe because he is a man, and I’ve only dated boys.

“I’m not staying here.” I say with all the coldness I can muster. His eyes harden. “The time for games is over, Anna.” In one swift motion, he catches me at the waist and swings me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, slamming the truck door and making his way to the house through the whirling snow. “Let me down this instant.” I pound at his back and kick my feet. The Tsar appears to be unfazed, wrapping his arms around my legs to ensure that I can no longer kick him. He carries me inside, my hollering dimmed to the outside world once the thick doors swing shut. We proceed at a fast clip up the grand, circular, wrought iron staircase. Three floors later, we emerge into a spacious suite. He locks the door and throws me down on the King-sized bed. “Do you realize that people have died here?” He stares down at me ruthlessly. I suppose it is some protective male instinct, but there is something else in those deep dark eyes. My body goes limp, but my tongue wins out, “You can’t hold me here against my will, you’re not an actual Tsar, even though you’re acting like one.” “I can hold you against your will for your own safety Anna. Think of your family. Would your parents want you alone in a cabin in the middle of nowhere with no electricity and possibly no running water? If the power goes out, the water pipes in your little cabin can freeze. Last time we had a blizzard like this, the roads were not cleared for a week. Not to mention, people have gotten lost wandering from shelter in whiteout conditions and died a few feet from their homes. I already know that you would not listen to me if I told you that you cannot go wandering around outside in conditions like this. Just think of today. What if you had hurt yourself, and I wasn’t there?” My cheeks burn, and I glare at him without speaking for a moment. I hadn’t thought of the pipes freezing in the cabin, but I don’t want to it to him that he could be right. The Tsar, and he really is like a wicked Tsar, I decide, heads over to the door and switches on the lamps that are on either side of the bed. I blink, as my eyes

adjust to the light, and survey the suite. Enormous wooden posts spiral to a high ceiling, rising off each corner of the King size bed. There is a bank of skylights across the ceiling and one wall consists of floor to ceiling windows. A sitting area is adjacent to the bedroom, which consists of a marble gas fireplace, above which hangs a wide flat screen TV. A tufted camel colored Ottoman, and a rectangular sectional, along with palm trees in pots make up the rest of the room. Another sitting area is arranged near the bed. Beyond that is a hallway, down which I assume is a bathroom and a closet. Valentin drags a piece of the sectional over in front of the door. The Ottoman contains thick blankets, and he pulls those out. Next, he comes over to the bed and removes one of the pillows. I move over as he gets near me, and glance at his face. Jaw clenched, his mouth set in a hard line, he gives me a searing glance that speaks volumes. I return the favor. After setting the pillow and blankets down on his makeshift bed, he gets on the phone that is hanging near the door. “The bathroom is down the hall on the left,” he says to me, as he dials. “I’ll sleep on the sectional; you can have my bed.” Despite my fury, a tingling sensation shoots from my navel to the juncture of my thighs at the thought of sleeping in his bed. I head down the hall, ears straining to overhear his conversation. Lights automatically turn on when I enter the bathroom. It’s palatial, I’ve never seen anything like it. There are two sinks with Onyx countertops, the floor tiled in what looks like old world Italian marble. There is a shower to the right with numerous jets, surrounded on two sides by clear glass. On the left is a huge jacuzzi tub with a step to climb up to it and on the far right behind the shower is a toilet and bidet. Palm fans line one shower wall so as to give privacy to the toilets. There are two skylights, and in front of the tub is a picture window that looks down the mountain. Pausing at the door, I hone in on his phone conversation. “Señora Madora. This is Valentin. Yes, she did agree to say. I just wanted to tell you to stay home tomorrow, I’ll cook for Anna and myself. I called Rick, he’ll put the word through to the men.” Shutting the door quietly, I place a hand on either side of the sink and release a deep breath, feeling shaky, as my adrenaline wears off. Conflicting feelings war

for my attention. Embarrassment, fear, and desire. Embarrassment that Valentin is probably right about me staying in his home. Fear of being alone with him in this huge house. Fear of myself and what we might start together. And desire that I cannot crush away with a simple wish. My thoughts go to the struggle outside, and the feeling of his body pressed into mine. It felt incredibly good, heightened even, with the undercurrent of rage. And I want the feeling back. Washing my hands and face, I glance in the mirror, and check my appearance. My eyes are glittering strangely, and my hair is an unholy mess. Running shaky fingers through it, I try to straighten the tangles. Unsure of which emotion is going to win out, I eventually emerge and head back down the hall, noticing that the Tsar is sitting at his desk typing on a laptop, and appears to be lost in thought. Not looking back, I him, and walk straight to the door, attempting to push the sectional away, as I pull on the handle. It might take an hour to walk back to the cabin, but I can’t stay. Not like this. I’m not going to be forced to be his prisoner. “Anna, don’t do that.” His voice is low and dangerous sounding. He’s moved very silently behind me, placing his large masculine hand over my smaller feminine one that is currently clutching the nob. “You can’t keep me here Valentin.” “I’m not going to let you leave Anna.” “It’s not your choice.” “It is my choice. I choose to keep you here for your own safety.” I look around at him furiously, the anger building. “I won’t be kept a prisoner.” I swing towards him, fist raised. He grabs my wrist and pins it behind my waist along with the other one, prying it off the doorknob. Every struggle I make against him causes him to tighten his grip on me until I can no longer move. Locked within his embrace, I feel the heat of his body against mine. Valentin looks down at me, his eyes heated with lusty appreciation at the sight of

my breasts, exposed and heaving over my shirt from the struggle between us. The tension between us is palpable. We’ve gone too far, and everything is about to come undone. I glare at him. Part of me wants to hate him, part of me wants him to bring those sensual lips down over mine with enough force to make me forget every negative thing I’ve ever thought about men. “I’m going to fuck you.” My pulse accelerates through the roof at his words, raw and primal. My mind wars within me. I can’t do this. Nice girls don’t do this. “And I’m going to make you forget him.” His dark eyes scorch my lighter ones. How did he know? Is it that obvious that I’ve been burned and had my heart broken? I wanted to do it the ‘right’ way, but that hasn’t worked for me so far. What about my code? Love first, then sex after established trust. This man is practically a stranger, he’s forceful. He tricked me into staying with him for the duration of the storm. That had to take some mental planning on his part. He is skilled and cunning. I fight for control. “That woman you were talking with at the gas station, who is she?” “My wife’s doctor. No worries Anna. I’m single. You’re single. We’re adults here. I haven’t been with anyone since my wife died. I’ve been tested for aids and other STD’s, and I’m clean. Anything else you want to know?” “Don’t you want to know about me?” “You need control. It’s obvious. You have all the signs of someone who’s been burned. But don’t punish me for his mistakes.” Emotions roil about in my brain. I want to go back to my cabin and think it through. There isn’t enough time to have relationship. It will never work. This will be about sex and desire and there’s nothing wrong with that, but I want more. However, I am 24 and still a virgin and no guarantee of happily ever after with anyone. Life doesn’t come with a guarantee that you’ll meet Mr. Right. Though, I guess he could be my Mr. Right Now.

“Anna.” He grips my chin with his fingers, forcing me to look into his eyes. “I want you.” There’s a tenderness in his voice, a vulnerability in him that I had not sensed before, a part of him that has gone through pain. And in this split second, I decide. “I want you too.” His lips close over mine, and a feeling of tremendous relief washes over me. It’s decided. He releases my hands, and I place them on his stubbly chiseled jaw. Lips warm and sensual, he caresses mine with an ease that feels like we’ve known each other forever. His hands move down my back to my bottom, pulling my ass cheeks towards his hips and the large bulge in front of his pants. His hardness turns me on, as does his forcefulness. His kisses are soft, caressing at first and then, more and more demanding. I release the tightness held in my body and allow my hands to roam freely over his body, feeling his shoulder blades, and back, and traveling down to his ass cheeks. His buttocks are tight and muscular, just like the rest of him. “Anna.” He whispers my name, his voice deep and sensual. A boldness, I did not know I possessed, takes over me. I unzip his jeans, reaching in to touch his cock, reveling in the silky-smooth surface of the bulbous tip beneath my fingers. He sighs with pleasure. We undress each other, drinking in the sight of each other’s bodies, moving together. His lips move to my ears and then down my neck, between my breasts. I grab tufts of his hair, as his tongue explores my body. His fingers go to my shirt, and he helps lift it over my head and fling it to the floor. His finger slips under the satin of my bra straps, and he tugs it off my shoulders until my breasts are exposed to his touch. A pang of self-consciousness shoots through me, as my nakedness reveals the stretch marks I’d gotten as a teen, when I put on all the weight from the stress of my parents’ divorce. “You’re beautiful.” The Tsar looks at my breasts with iration, his mouth

moving down to cover my nipple. I grab his hair, feeling waves of pleasure as he sucks at my breasts, his fingers moving over the ridge of my jeans to fondle my pussy lips and clit. I push my crotch into his fingers, as I hold his head in my arms. His tongue travels from my breasts to my navel and down to the top snap of my jeans. Releasing one of my hands, he unzips my pants, reaching in to fondle my velvet as he returns his mouth to my nipple. I rock into him, running my fingers through his hair and releasing a sigh of pleasure. In the back of my mind, I wonder, how this can be happening? My rage is being channeled into lust. It’s obvious he’s experienced; his fingers capably bring me to the boiling point. “I want you inside me.” I pant, breathlessly giving into the mounting pressure between my thighs. He releases my other hand and pulls my jeans and panties off. Removing his polo shirt and jeans reveal his well-muscled frame and swollen cock. He picks me up and takes me to his bed. I spread my legs, feeling my own breasts as I do so, and sigh, waiting for him to grab a condom. He doesn’t bother. Can I trust him? I want to. “I have an IUD.” “Good, because I don’t want anything between us. And when I shoot my cum, I want to know that part of me is going to stay inside you.” I shiver, feeling desire rocket through my body. The Tsar mounts me, sliding his long, heavy cock between my slick pussy lips. It’s a snug fit, and I cry out, as he pushes in deeply. There is momentarily a sharp pain and then sweetness. He kisses me fiercely, stroking me over and over as he does so, sending waves of pleasure between my legs. I have never felt anything like this in the world. It’s unreal. How can I be letting this stranger fuck me like a wild animal? This is my first time with a man. I’ve just met him. We are connected bodily at the deepest level. It isn’t supposed to be like this, but I find I can’t stop myself. His desire for me is intoxicatingly intense. His cock pushes deep inside me, as his mouth devours mine.

The bed creaks with the force of our movements, the headboard banging against the wall with every hard thrust he gives me, adding to the feeling that we’re doing something naughty. I claw his back and pant, spreading my legs wider, knees bent, back arched, allowing his cock to enter deeper, as it pushes and strokes and demands. He pauses, looking into my eyes, “Anna do you want this?” “What? Yes, obviously,” There’s a hint of indignation in my reply. He laughs and rolls me over on to him. There is a sensation of colossal pressure inside me, as I mount him. I control the thrusts, riding him like a horse. The Tsar looks up at me, an expression of immense pleasure written across his face. “Anna?” His dark eyes caress my own. “I am the happiest man on earth right now.” I laugh, feeling caught up in the moment, with the frenzy of lust and desire, the sound of the storm winds rolling over the house in the background. I feel safe with him. He cups my breasts, pinching on my nipples with his thumb. Smiling up at me, he grabs my buttocks, forcing me deeper into him. I cry out with pleasure, feeling the intensity of the throbbing build, until it bursts like a dam under pressure, and I climax, feeling it spread through my body, down to my toes. Never feeling so alive as at this moment. I collapse on top of him, heart pounding. I lie on him, breathing while he caresses me, running his fingers down my back, over my bottom, and the top of my legs. When I catch my breath, he kisses me, rolling me over onto my back, penetrating my mouth, as he strokes the space between my pussy lips. The wave starts to build again as his movements become faster. He pounds into me, making my clit return to an aching throb that demands release. Arching my back, my muscles contract as I lock into the final throes of ecstasy. A cry escapes my throat, as I cum. “Anna,” his deep voice speaks my name with a depth of emotion that sounds like an animalistic release of pain and pleasure all rolled into one. Fleetingly, it s somewhere in the recesses of my gray matter, that I am his first since the death of his wife.

He cums, the force of his cock sending his seed deep inside me. Hands on his chest, the pounding of his heart reverberates through my fingers. “Anna,” he breathes my name, kissing me, caressing my hair. And then he looks at me, studying my features and running a finger lightly over my lips. “You’re so beautiful Anna. But your inner fire is what I like about you.” He pulls me over on to him, and I rest my head on his chest, anchored to his heartbeat, feeling the strength of his chest muscles rippling beneath me. We stay in this state for a while, peacefully, listening to the sound of the wind as it gusts around the house. A trickle of fluid runs down the inside of my leg. I sit up, feeling a little exposed and vulnerable, “I need a shower.” Valentin sits up with me, pulling a strand of hair back from my face. “I’m coming with you.” I stand, noticing the blood, crimson red on my leg and the white sheets. He notices it too. “Your period?” “No, it’s not my period. This is my first time,” I explain, expecting to be embarrassed, but I’m not at all. I feel triumphant. Like I finally know what it’s like to be with a man, and it’s incredible. “Tonight was your first time with a man?” He repeats it slowly, looking at me in amazement. I blush and grab the top sheet off the bed, wrapping it around me like a toga. He comes over to me and wraps his strong arms around me, lifting my chin and looking into my eyes. “You seemed,” he hesitates, “the way you moved, like you had experience.” “I guess I’m a natural, plus, I’m well acquainted with a vibe.” I laugh, and he s me. We head into the shower together. Hot steam clouds the glass walls, and drips down the tiles. Taking a bar of soap, the Tsar rubs it all over my body, beginning with my breasts, lathering it up and making it slippery. He moves it over the stretch marks on my abdomen, and I cringe inwardly, feeling self-conscious. I

want to be proud of myself, accept myself as I am, but I fear ridicule. He notices. “Every part of you is beautiful Anna.” He places the bar of soap in my hand, places his hand over mine, and traces it over his abdomen and around to his back. Faint pink scars make stripes down his bronzed skin. His vulnerability is evident under the soap. Gently, I guide it over his scars, wondering if he will confide in me. “My father.” “I’m sorry.” He shrugs, momentarily shading his eyes from mine. Obviously, it’s a painful subject. He leans down to me and grazes my lips with his. “I’d rather think about you.”

Chapter 7

Anna In my dream, the Tsar is chasing me through the snow. I run, but he gains on me. He catches me, as I reach his truck. Eyes dark and ruthless, he enters and shuts the door, his fingers moving to undress me and pull down my pants. His large hands squeeze my breasts, and he shoves his cock inside me, fucking me hard and fast, the truck rocking under the force of his thrusts. I’m turned on by his forcefulness, but I fight him, and he pins my arms. “You can’t escape me Anna.” Legs spread for him, desire rises in my body as he strokes my pussy lips and clit, till I am flushed and panting. His words are raw, primal, “I’m going to make you have my baby.” I awake to the sound of myself crying out, as I’m about to reach orgasm, sweating, aware of the swollenness of my pussy lips, the ache building between my thighs. The feeling of wanting to be fucked, feeling like I want to have his baby, remain. An unusual fantasy for me, but undeniably there. The Tsar stirs beside me. Outside, the wind howls around the house, as the storm releases its wrath. “Anna, what’s wrong?” His low, masculine voice is protective, reassuring. “Did you have a bad dream?” I hesitate, not wanting to explain my dream to him. “No. Not a bad one.” Valentin stares down at me in the darkness. The tension coiled inside my naked body waits to be released. I lie still, feeling the electricity of attraction for this man run wildly through my body. He must feel it too, because he mounts me, places his lips on mine and slides his tongue inside my mouth. Arching my back, I accept his cock inside me, as deep as it can go. The Tsar humps me, his masculine grunts intermingling with my cries of pleasure. It is frenzied, horny fucking, so loud that even the wind can’t drown it out, so hard, I think the bed might break. The animalistic desire for him and for his baby run so deep inside me, that I’m afraid I’ll yell it out.

Instead, I keep it inside, feeling the throbbing ache build to such an intensity that it explodes, sending out waves of bliss from the point between my thighs to every cell in my body. He comes immediately after, shooting his cum deep inside me as he yells my name. “Oh my god, Anna, you siren temptress.” Laughter bubbles out of me, this is amazing bliss. He wants me. I want him. And some deep biological drive inside me wants a baby with him. This thought isn’t anywhere near rational, I know that. This is not my usual way of living. And I must it to myself that I’m not sure why I’m being like this, other than the fact that maybe I know we only have a couple of weeks together at most and then we’ll be in our own worlds and separate states. I look up at him in the darkness, thinking about my dream, wondering what it is about this man that is making me act in this way. Thinking that this is not my usual way of making decisions. Usually, I’m controlled, thinking through things. Head on his chest, I settle next to him, unable to sleep for a while, thinking about the consequences of my actions. A thousand thoughts crowd my mind, I’ve thrown out my own rule book with this man. How am I going to deal with the feelings he elicits in me? I’m terrified and excited, all rolled into one. Wrapping an arm around him, I sigh, feeling his arm reach around my body to move me closer to him. The worries will have to wait, for now, I will revel in the night.

Chapter 8

Valentin Silently, I stand at the window, watching her sleep. Silken hair frames her face, dark lashes fan against pink cheeks. She has the face of an Angel, though her demeanor doesn’t show that she knows it herself. She hides her vulnerability with toughness, but last night, she let me in a little bit. Last night. My God what a night. I’ve never had sex like I had with this young woman. It is unbelievable that she gave me her innocence. It’s a first for me too, in more ways than one. The first time since my wife died that I’ve been with a woman. And the first time that I’ve ever been with a woman younger than myself. I’ve always dated experienced, older women. Never had a fondness for young women, too much drama and immaturity for my taste. But Anna is different. She has no idea the feelings she arouses in me. I think back to the first sight I had of her at the gas station. She caught my eye, there was something about her. A vulnerability. A diamond in the rough, with those huge boots and messy hair. But the vulnerability is the thing that drew me to her, made me want to protect her. I wanted to meet her then, but my wife’s oncologist was there, and I had not been able to go after her at the store. She’d slipped by me once, though, so I took a picture of her jeep and license plate and was planning on finding a way to get the scoop on her. And then my luck! My God, what kind of luck is this? Señora Madora calls it fate, but whatever it is, I’m grateful. And a little bit concerned. She said she liked being single. She doesn’t live close by. She’s very independent. And the worst thing is, even if I can somehow convince her to be in a relationship, how will it turn out if she finds out I can’t give her a biological child? That it’s my fault that my wife couldn’t conceive. What then? My brother and I built a billion-dollar business from sweat equity and utilizing the best minds we could find to work with us, but I’ve done that with finding the best doctors in the world, and they couldn’t help me and Marina have a baby. And most woman want to have a baby at some point in their lives. Señora Madora ’s ‘predictions’ have screwed with my head. There’s some part of me that wants to believe that Senora’s is right, even though it sounds crazy as fuck. I don’t think I should be that naïve, maybe it’s my dick talking, but I can’t help but ire Anna’s pluck. She started her own business. She came up to this

wild place and did it without anyone being with her. I can’t help but like that about her. And, my cock loves her too, because damn…she must have done a lot of practicing with that vibe because she knows how to fucking move. Sexy as hell. My cock gets hard just thinking about it. She opens her eyes, blinks as if to clear her vision, and brushes strands of messy hair off her face. Her gaze moves in my direction, eyes widening, cheeks turning rosy at the sight of my half naked body. “Good morning, Anna.” “Good morning.” “Wild night last night.” Her cheeks blush a deeper shade of red. “You still think I’m the wicked Tsar for keeping you here with me?” She cocks an eyebrow at me. “Yes, I do.” I walk over to her, pull her into my arms and give her a minty kiss. “I hope you’ll forgive me.” Of course, I would do it all over again. “As long as you don’t play games with me.” A shadow crosses her face, and I wonder what happened to her that has caused her to be jaded in love. “I have no intention of doing anything to harm you.” She puts a hand on each side of my face, fingers gently grazing the dark stubble on my jaw and searches my eyes for the truth. “I’m going to be honest with you Valentin.” “Please do.” “I had a religious upbringing, even went to a religious school,” she shakes her head and shades her eyes from mine, “I don’t do one-night stands. I don’t know what came over me last night.” Her beautiful dark rimmed, blue eyes return to mine. “If you hadn’t forced me to stay here, this would not have happened.” Her expression is troubled.

“We can’t undo the fact that we made love, and it was beautiful.” “I don’t want to undo it, but I’m not sure where to go from here.” I wouldn’t have made a fortune if I didn’t know where I wanted to go. And right now, I know exactly where I want to go. Straight to Heaven with this Angel gracing my bedroom. But, as much as I want her again, I’m going to have to give her some space, she’s young, she just went against her own code, and she’s trapped with me for the rest of the storm. I think it’s freaking her out a little, obviously she’s used to being in control. But unfortunately for her, she’s entered my lair, and I’m not going to tell her this, but I plan on seducing her every chance I can get. I know she’s massively attracted to me; she’d wouldn’t have acted the way she did last night unless she was. I’ll give her the space she needs. Releasing her from my arms, I take a step back. “We can talk later; you probably need a coffee. Am I right?” Hugging her arms to her chest, she nods with relief. “That’d be great. Thanks.” “Stay here.” Smiling, I throw her the TV remote, “Watch TV, I’ll get you a coffee and make you breakfast.” “Are you as good as Señora Madora?” She teases me. “That hurts,” I put my hands over my heart area. “Patience, and you’ll see what I can do.” I give her a wink. She switches on the flat screen, but I can tell that she’s watching me, as I walk into the kitchen area. I’ve already retrieved the leftovers from last night’s dinner from the downstairs kitchen, and I rummage around through the cupboards and fridge, piling the cookware and supplies on the counter. In the other room, Anna flips through the channels till she finds a weather update. … the governor has declared a state of emergency … everyone should remain off the roads, and seek shelter unless otherwise advised… snow should taper off by this evening… we may even break a record, folks… Good, that will give me time with her. Once the skillet heats, I crack some eggs and toss some crumbled salmon bits

from last night’s dinner into the melted butter. Anna appears to be lost in thought as she idly channel surfs, a slight frown marring her beautiful brows. There’s a lot of worry going on behind the scenes of that lovely face. I call out to her from the kitchen, “Cream and sugar?” “A lot of both please.” I walk to her with an earthen colored mug filled with steaming coffee. “Thank you, kind Sir,” She smiles at me. “You’re quite welcome, me lady.” I give her a little bow and a flourish, and it makes her laugh. “I like this hotel.” She gives me a broad smile, easing the frown that formerly covered her forehead. “We aim to please at this establishment.” She leans back against the pillows, savoring the coffee, and glances down the mountainside into the storm. As I walk back to the kitchen, the slight worry lines return to her forehead. With a little effort, I intend to erase those lines and show her a good time. The salmon hash is about finished, and I give it a couple of final scrapes before I pile it onto 2 plates. I can’t help but the last time I did this for Marina, her final days were heart wrenching. Still is, when I allow myself to think about it. As I carry the plates out to Anna, I make myself focus on this moment with her. It’s all I have right now, I don’t think I realized how much I’ve been missing this. Just being together. It makes me happy to see Anna dig in with relish. Sex does give an appetite. “Valentin. This is incredible. How did you learn to cook like this? I thought you were going to fix fruit loops or something.” “Fruit loops?” I laugh. She laughs with me. “I had no idea you had a whole kitchen up here. This is so

good.” “Thanks. I’ve had some practice.” A brief pain stabs at my heart, as I days spent up here trying to figure out a meal that would help Marina be able to eat without getting sick. “I had a kitchen put in up here. I used to cook for my wife sometimes. She wanted to be home at the end.” Eyes widening, her expression is immediately sorrowful. It’s a common reaction, it’s hard for people to know what to say when you’ve lost the person closest to you in the world. “I’m very sorry. That must have been so difficult.” “It was.” I give her a half smile. It’s been two years, and I’m doing better than I was, but sometimes it’s still tough. Even though my wife and I had a troubled relationship, my love for her ran deep. With a rueful expression, she gently touches my arm, her fingertips soft against my skin. Not saying a word, except with her expressive eyes, looking deeply into mine as though she understands what it’s like to feel the pain of losing somebody.

Chapter 9

Anna We finish breakfast, and I head off to the bathroom to brush my teeth, thinking it would be nice to have my own clothes and a hairbrush. I throw my clothes on from the day before and head back to the kitchen. The Tsar is washing dishes when I come in and gives me a playful snap on the butt with a towel. “Our honeymoon is over Anna, you’re dressed.” I flush red, not knowing what to say. My feelings are conflicted. We hardly know each other, and I don’t want to be viewed as loose, sleeping with him because it’s convenient. Sex, heck yes. I want it with him, but don’t I have to be careful? He’s lost his wife, and lives in this gigantic mansion by himself, he’s probably kind of lonely. I have a business in North Carolina. He has a business here. When my vacation is over, I will be 18 hours away from him. I know the mature thing to do is take a step back, detach. My Southern Baptist upbringing looms in the back of my mind, my mother’s voice in the back of my head, “Nice girls don’t fool around.” Mom gave me the pep talk before I left for college, knowing that dorm life and frat parties can get crazy. Deep down I know that I’m somewhat old-fashioned. But no guy has ever come along that stirs me as much as the man standing before me. These thoughts run through my head, along with images of our wild night together. I need to get away and ruminate on this. Changing the subject, I look out the window, “I think I’m going to go outside and walk around in the snow; it looks beautiful. We don’t get snow like this in the South, I feel like I’ve been missing out.” “I’ll come with you.” “Afraid I’ll leave?” “Yes.” We both laugh. I look out the floor to ceiling windows, down the mountainside into the storm, as

I wait for Valentin to dress. It’s a winter wonderland. Everything is covered in whiteness, the snow unabated in its rapid descent from the sky. Whirling in a circle, I stick out my tongue, catching the big white flakes as they come down. The Tsar watches me, smiling. “You look like a kid that has never seen snow.” “I haven’t, not like this. This is amazing. I love it, it’s like magic.” “It is magic.” His eyes caress mine, giving me the impression that he is talking about more than the snow. I return the gaze, while discreetly gathering a ball of snow in my mittened hands. “Gathering your weapons, I see.” The Tsar gathers his own and starts towards me. I shriek and laugh, running in the opposite direction. He laughs at me, and then playfully shoots a snowball at my butt. It’s a direct hit, smacking right across my bottom. The hard, icy wetness penetrates my jeans and panties straight through to the sensitive skin of my buttocks and leaves my skin cold and wet. “Unbelievable!” I yell at him, shooting back at him and narrowly missing his head. We go back and forth like two kids, until we’re covered, though I realize that I’ve gotten the worst of it. Out of breath, I drop down on the snow-covered lawn, spread my arms and legs and flail like mad. “I’ve always wanted to do this, but we never got enough snow.” Valentin stands over me and gazes down, the corners of his dark eyes crinkling in amusement. “You just go with the flow, don’t you?” “Sometimes. Yeah.” I laugh, I’d temporarily forgotten my worried thoughts about him, and it feels good to be here in this moment and be wild and free. A snowy wonder world is all around us, and it’s amazing. Valentin drops to the ground beside me, and I wonder what thoughts he’s having because I catch a momentary expression of what looks like pain on his face. “Are you alright?” He removes his glove, reaching his long fingers towards my cold cheek, the

warm pads of his fingers gently brushing my frozen skin. There’s a vulnerability in his expression, and I wonder if he’s thinking of the wife he lost. Midnight rimmed black eyes search my face. “More than alright. Come on, I want to show you something.” We end up at the back of the mansion. He shows me the pool, sauna and hot tub which are covered with a thick layer of snow. Valentin begins to clear the tub as I watch. “Let’s get in.” His dark eyes melt into my insides. The searing heat of his desire, ramping through me like a fireball hitting me square in the heart. “I don’t have a swimsuit.” “That’s alright, your birthday suit is perfect.” The Tsar raises his brows and winks. A jolt of energy rushes to the region between my thighs. “What about Señora Madora?” “What about her?” “What if she comes along and sees us?” “I don’t think she’ll be going outside today, but if she does, I’m sure she will not be bothered by the fact that 2 adults are naked in hot tub.” Two seconds is all it takes, to convince me that it’s a great idea. Getting into a steaming tub at the edge of what looks like an enchanted forest out of some ancient fairy tale, snow heavily falling around us, is not something I’ve ever thought about, and now that I find myself here, it seems a remarkable thing and I better try it. Pushing away niggling thoughts of being a loose woman and possibly hurting both of us when I return to the South for my business, I simply look into his sensuous eyes and say, “OK.” “Go,” He points to the door of the sauna. “Take off your clothes and get warm. I’ll carry you to the tub, so you don’t have to get your feet cold.” The Tsar grins at me, obviously confident in his ability to seduce me. He opens the cedar door,

and I enter and sit on the warm wooden seat. Thoughts of being in the confined space of the hot tub alone and naked with the Tsar, amid the falling snow, with a view of the white shrouded woods makes my heart expand and my pussy lips swell. If I let him, he’ll fuck me again and again, and I it to myself that I want him too, just as badly. Maybe I’m making up for the colossal rejection by my last boyfriend, maybe my biological clock is ticking or because it’s approaching the middle of the month for me, I don’t know. I do know that if I remain in his house, I’m going to be driven in that direction. The attraction between us is overwhelming and potent. The part of myself that I think of as a good southern Baptist girl is dropping away, now that I’m in the untamed hoary North, and the emerging part of myself is raw and primal and wants to be screwed in an animalistic fashion by a man that can’t keep his hands off me. I slowly peel off the outer layers of my clothing and leave them on the bench. The Tsar must have cranked up the heat because my body warms all over to the point of being about to sweat. There’s a knock on the door. “Yeeeeesssss.” I draw out the ‘yes’ in a playful fashion. “Who is it?” “It’s the big bad Wolf.” “I don’t know if I can let you in.” A gust of wind and snow showers my half naked body as soon as I crack the door open. “Unfortunately for you, you cracked open the door, and now the Wolf has the advantage.” He leans his shovel on the outside, steps into the heated space, and drops his clothes. There’s no helping me, the man is magnificent from head to toe. His eyes heat as they take me in and my gaze drops to his sensuous lips, and then down to his pecs, his muscular bod and back up to his eyes. They say that the eyes are the window of the soul, and if that’s true, this soul before me wants me, and only me. I’ve never had a man look at me the way this one is right now. Jesus, how did I get so lucky? He doesn’t move, he waits, watching me, melting my insides like marshmallows in a cup of hot chocolate.

My heart hammers in my chest, I want him to kiss me, hard and fast, like there’s no tomorrow. He steps towards me and grips me at the waist, bringing those soft, sensuous, full lips over mine, gently at first. His hands move down my back, dip to the inside of my panties, and come to rest on my bare ass cheeks. His cock, tip soft and firm, presses into my belly. He wants me, the desire flows like a wave, engulfing me in its force. He wastes no time. His firm hands massage my skin, creating tingling warmth all over my body. With one smooth motion, he lifts me into his arms, and carries me into the frigid air. The wind and flying snow take my breath away. “God. It’s so cold.” I laugh and kick my feet, noting the bruise on my ankle. If I hadn’t borrowed the boots from Rachel’s brother Jack, I probably wouldn’t be having this experience. Ah, the wonderful strangeness of life. Momentarily, I wish for the warmth of the sauna, but once he lifts me into the hot tub, it’s clear to me that it was worth briefly exposing my naked flesh to the wind driven snow. I sink into the depths, feeling the cold at my face and the bubbly, frothy heat enveloping my bare skin. The sight before my eyes is like something out of a picture book, simply breathtaking, pines covered in clumps of dense snow, the entire woods transformed by the transcendent beauty of the falling snow. The Tsar is behind me, his cock long and erect, stalking me like a Wolf hunting its prey. ***** Valentin Anna leans over the edge of the hot tub, transfixed by the forest scene before her eyes. I’m also in a catatonic state, simply from watching her. My cock remains uncomfortably stiff, and the desire to ram myself between her thighs, until she cries out with bliss, is overwhelming. The enchantment of last night is still with us, and I don’t want to end it by

moving in on her too fast. Is she turning her back on me because I’m rushing her? Part of me feels that I should tell her that I can’t have kids. To be fair, just in case. But she isn’t ready for that yet. It would scare her away from me, and I want her to come closer. I’m already imagining a future with Anna. One that involves fucking her day and night. One that involves putting my mother’s heirloom sapphire ring on her finger. This isn’t like my old self, the one before Marina. Marina’s death inevitably changed me. Life is short, and it must be grabbed onto as quickly as possible before it escapes. Just like I want to grab onto Anna and never let her escape me. Maybe she doesn’t want kids. Some women don’t, I push the thought away. Anna will probably want her own kids someday, that is the likely truth, but sometimes I lie to myself to keep going. And right now, she gives me hope, hope that I can set aside grief for a while and enjoy life. This girl that came out of nowhere is working magic on my heart and soul. I want to live again, I need to live again. Images of her pinned beneath me in my truck flash across my mind’s eye. The nerve of this woman, the fire in her. She’s a looker, but her blazing spirit is what I’m drawn to. But damn, the combination, and that butt. I look at the curve of her hips and move towards her, my cock erect and ready, and allow myself to slide between her legs from the rear. Her body tenses up momentarily, and I observe her scanning the environment, as though she’s looking for someone. “She’s not going to appear out here. Relax Anna, Señora Madora’s never been a fan of winter walks in the woods, and there aren’t any houses around for miles.” Anna releases a sigh and sinks back into me and my stiff rod. The snow continues to fall around us, blanketing the woods and our heads as I slide past the swollen lips and slowly insert myself into the constrictive space of her pussy. A powerful surge of lust overtakes me, and I push her to the side of the tub. Both of us grip the sides, as I bang her from behind, my fingers working her swollen clit. Her moans are soft at first but become louder as the intensity of my penetrations increase. Steam rises around us, and water sloshes over the sides with the force of my thrusting, her luscious ass cheeks jiggling with every motion. Seeing her

move and hearing her cry with pleasure make me horny as hell. I want to slow down, but the beast inside me takes over, driving into her with force, as my cum shoots into her tight pussy. A deep, guttural expletive erupts from my throat, the accumulation of pain filled lonely nights, the satiation of a hunger that has gnawed at me since I lost Marina. I hold her tightly, allowing my body to slowly release from hers. She turns towards me, and I melt into the storm of the ocean blue eyes. They cast a spell on me, drawing me into her, making me want more and more of her. “I need to cum.” Her words are not accusatory, but direct and exact. I marvel at her grace. She takes my hand and guides it to the swollen nub between her thighs. My fingers move to stroke it, my other hand moving two fingers into the velvet slit between the plump pink lips. “Hmm.” Her sighs direct me, and she helps guide my fingers the way she wants it. Obviously, she has some self-practice because for someone who claims to be a virgin, she certainly knows her own body and what she likes. Her hips kick into my fingers with an ever-quickening pace, until she grabs me about my neck and moves her body over mine. Gripping and clawing my hair and back, she rides my fingers, creating waves of water that slosh over the sides of the tub, her muscles clamping down on my fingers, until she reaches her climax. “I’m coming. Oh. Oh. OH!” The nervous inhibition she exhibited earlier is gone, her cries echoing dimly off the surrounding woods, muted by the snow. “Oh my God.” With her head thrown back, Anna looks like some otherworldly goddess. How did I get so lucky? And how am I going to keep this goddess in my realm?

Chapter 10

Anna “You know,” I say, picking up my damp clothes strewn on the bathroom floor, “I have absolutely nothing to wear.” “It’s not a problem for me.” Valentin gives me a deviant smile. I shoot him a quirky eyebrow raise. “I need to go home and get my clothes, it’s too cold to go without. I could walk.” “Not going to happen prisoner.” He bares his teeth at me playfully and whips my butt with a towel. “I was going to give you something of mine to wear, but I think I’ve decided that I’d rather see you walk around naked.” “Ha. Such a comedian. I’ll find something.” I walk into his closet, and he follows. “You’ll swim in my jeans, but you could wear one of my shirts as a dress.” He gives me one of his white dress shirts and a polo sweater. The scent of freshly laundered clothing clings to me like a hug, and thankfully his shirt hangs right above my knees. He digs out a pair of wool ski socks, which on me, come to above my knees. “You’re cute.” “Thanks.” I glance in the floor to ceiling mirror. “And you were afraid you would have nothing to wear to the ball, Cinderella.” Valentin comes up behind me, wraps his arms around my waist, and we study our reflection. “We look good together, a pair of opposites don’t you think?” We study the pair in the mirror. We are a pair of opposites. The Tsar with his dark hair and eyes and rugged complexion, me with pale skin and light eyes and hair. He’s a head taller and broad shouldered, making me look diminutive against him. I marvel at him, wondering how this happened so quickly and how it will turn out for us. His company is immensely enjoyable, and he certainly isn’t hard on the eyes either.

We fix grilled cheese and tomato soup and sit at the table talking and looking out at the storm. It seems to be abating to some extent. “When do you think the roads will be clear?” I ask. “Tomorrow or the next day, depending. Don’t worry Anna, I’m going to keep you here as long as possible.” His eyes lock onto mine. “I’m not worried, though, unfortunately, my parents probably are.” “You could call them from here.” “Maybe after I eat.” A tinge of discomfort pings in my brain. My mother has a sixth sense for things like this, she might sense something is different in my voice. “Do you have any siblings?” “No, I’m an only child. That’s how I came to inherit my grandmother’s cabin. She had a boy and a girl. My mother is her daughter. Her son, my uncle Frank, died young of a freak accident. He never had children, so I was the only grandchild on my mother’s side. My mother was left with her house, and she left me the cabin. We didn’t know that she had this place up here until after she died. It’s strange that we didn’t know, but then again, she did travel for extensive periods of time. When I talked to the Bennett’s on the phone it sounded like they knew my grandmother well, so I assume she must have come here many times.” “Your grandmother was a self-determined woman.” “She was. She and my mom had many conflicts over it. My mom liked to know where she was, especially as she got older, but my grandmother might take off at the drop of a hat to some parts unknown. One time, my mom got a call from her in the middle of the night. Scared her half to death, turns out my grandmother had up and decided to head to Brazil. She was tired of winter and took off. I think she had had a few when she called, but she knew how to live. She was a very vital woman, my grandmother.” “You loved her very much, I can tell.” “I did, still do. We got along well. I’m actually more like my grandmother than my mother.”

“I can see that you take after her. I used to see her walking down the road from her place a lot, she always seemed like she had a lot of energy, like you.” “You talked with my Nana?” “Yeah, she was a live wire. No doubt about it, gave me wildflowers too, more than once.” “She did?” A warm glow comes over me, mixing with the sharp pang of missing her. Tears prick the corner of my eyes. “Yeah, she did.” “That makes me miss her so much. God.” He reaches for my fingers and gently holds them. “I’m sorry. It’s hard, I know.” “You talked to her?” “Oh yeah. She and Emma used to walk together and the two of them.” He shakes his head. I laugh. “They flirted with you?” “Of course.” I laugh again. “Yeah, Nana did notice men, especially after Pop died. She liked younger men; said they had more vitality.” He laughs. “I never realized that I would be with her granddaughter one day.” The phone rings. “Excuse me Anna, I should answer this. It’s probably my brother.” “Yeah, go ahead.” Warm thoughts of my Nana surround me like a warm blanket. It’s a good feeling to connect with someone that my Nana knew and certainly must have liked. If she gave him flowers, she must have liked him, but Nana got along with everyone, she was just that way. Valentin answers the phone and walks into the next room, speaking in what sounds like Russian. Busying myself with the dishes, I survey the kitchen. It’s

exactly right for a bachelor, I decide, but it makes me think of his wife that died, and I wonder what happened to her to die so young? I also wonder why he doesn’t keep pictures of her around. Valentin returns, smiling. “That was my brother.” He explains. “He was wondering how I was making out with the storm. Last time we had a storm like this one of my backup generators went down. Anyhow, I want you to meet him. He’s coming up for the party I hold for my employees and their families. It’s an annual event to welcome spring, and I’m hoping you will agree to be my date. You can meet everyone at once.” “Sounds like fun. I’ll put it on my remarkably busy social calendar.” I smile, thinking it would be interesting to meet his brother. I wonder if they are very much alike. “Where is your brother coming from?” “He lives in Manhattan. It’s a bit of a drive, so they’ll stay overnight.” “He has kids?” “Two boys. I hope you like them. Antonin’s wife is a bit particular, but you’ll be OK with her.” I squint my eyes at him. “What do you mean by that?” “You’ll see.” “OK. Sure. What does your brother do?” “Still runs the tech company we started together. He bought out my share when I wanted to retire to a quieter place where I could stay out of trouble.” He shoots me a rueful look. “I was trying to save my marriage at that point, and we needed a quieter place and I needed to work less. But my brother loves the city, and he’s particularly good at what he does. He works extremely hard, but he is a family man. I think my father being gone so much, made us realize the importance of that.” “Do you want to call your parents?”

“I guess I better.” I give him a sheepish smile. “My mother will probably have something to say about me being alone in the middle of nowhere in a blizzard.” “Would you like me to get on and vouch for your whereabouts last evening?” He teases me. “I could tell her you were not alone.” “Heavens, no!” I give him a playful punch on the arm. “My mother would have a conniption if she ever found out I spent the night with a man I had just met.” “Old-fashioned?” “Very. There’s no need to worry her, maybe I shouldn’t call.” I mull it over in my mind. “If she talked to the Bennett’s, then she knows I’m here.” “They don’t know at this point, but it is usually best to stick as close to the truth as possible.” “I’ve talked myself out of it. She’ll ask me 50 questions, and I’m not ready for that.” He moves towards me, laugh lines crinkling around his eyes as he gazes into mine. Reaching a hand towards me, he pulls me into an embrace and kisses the top of my head, “What are you ready for beautiful?” “Let’s get in bed and watch the snow.” The Tsar’s dark eyes glow at the suggestion, but I’m ready for rest. I’m not yet caught up from the drive north, and we’ve had sex three times in less than 24 hours. I’m tired and a little sore. We get in bed together, watching the snow, snuggling, my head on his chest. We fall asleep like that till late afternoon. When I wake up, the light is starting to dim, but I notice that the snow has stopped. There is just a loud howling grayness left, and white everywhere. The room seems cold, and I think it’s due to the lack of my clothing, but the Tsar notices it too. “I need to go check the generators.” He gets up and dresses, pulling on work boots and a winter jacket. “I think you better put on something warmer Anna. Hopefully, I’ll be back soon. If you’re hungry there’s food in the downstairs kitchen. There isn’t much up here. Not even peanut butter.” He winks

at me, gives me a lingering kiss, and heads out the door. “Explore the house if you like.” He says over shoulder. I yawn, stretch, and get out of bed in search of warmer clothing. I find some pajama bottoms with a drawstring hanging in his closet and pull them as tight as possible. They sag, but it’s warmth. I put on my down jacket and boots and sit on the edge of the bed trying to decide what to do next. I wonder what tonight will be like, and how tomorrow will be, alone in my little cabin.

Chapter 11

Anna Valentin left his watch on his nightstand, and I pick it up, iring it. It’s a man’s leather hardware watch trimmed with silver. The symbols are Russian, but I can still read the time. Eleven minutes after four. I place it back on the nightstand, noticing that there’s a paper sticking out of the top drawer. I open it, intending to push it back in. As I do, I notice a photo sitting on top of the paper. With careful fingers, I retrieve the photo and study the woman in the picture, immediately realizing that this must be his wife. The woman is beautiful, dark hair and eyes, honey colored skin and a heart shaped face. The Tsar has not spoken very much about his wife or why they’d not been able to conceive. He’d mentioned his wife’s oncologist, but I felt uncomfortable asking questions about her death. It’s painful to him, I’m certain of it, hence, the reason for keeping photos of her hidden. My conscience nags at me, telling me to be the strong one. I can’t go any further in this relationship. We are worlds apart, and in three weeks it won’t matter, I’ll be back at work in sunny North Carolina, and he will be here, in the wildlands of Vermont. How in the world am I going to do this? He’s like a drug, intoxicating to my senses, burning his way through me so that I no longer look at the world in the same way. Ruminating over this gets me nowhere, my mind remains split in two over it. I decide to distract myself and explore his house. My feet take me to the enormous spiral staircase and the second floor, which I’ve not yet seen. The 2nd floor consists of a giant game room and bedrooms and private bathrooms. I walk through some of them, noting their sense of luxuriousness, wondering if the Tsar and his wife were intending to have a large family or if they liked to entertain a lot. I continue to the first floor. There is a library and an immense sunroom, ‘his’ and ‘hers’ bathrooms, an enormous kitchen, a bar, plus the bedroom that was offered to me on the first night, and the sitting room. The most interesting of the rooms is a grand looking formal dining room that faces the front of the house. The table is enormous and elegant with rich, tapestried, gold Parsons chairs for seating. The walls are red,

and I walk over to study the artwork. There are Russian folk scenes painted onto the walls, beautifully done in vivid colors. I stay here the longest, my eye taking in every detail, wondering what the stories are behind the paintings. I haven’t finished going through the house when I hear the Tsar calling to me from the kitchen. “Honey, I’m home.” “In here,” I call out. He walks in, a broad smile lighting his face when he sees me. “I see you’ve been looking around.” “I have been, these paintings are stunning. I’d love to hear the stories behind them sometime. Your house is gorgeous. I toured a bit while you were out.” “Thank you. I’m glad you had a chance to look around.” He comes over to me and pulls me to him, his fingers caressing my hair. He runs one set of fingers over my cheekbones in a lazy fashion, as he gazes into my face, his eyes like warm, deep, liquid pools. A tingling sensation courses through my body, all the way down to my toes. The Tsar pulls me tighter to him. “I missed you.” He is seductive, no doubt about it. My body melts against his, even though, I have concerns about how things will end between us. “How did it go?” “A line went down from the wind, and the main breaker tripped, but I have backup generators and that will help. I had to clear out the generators, snow is piling up fast and blocking the intakes. The power company won’t be able to get up here until the roads are cleared. But we should be OK tonight.” “That’s great.” “What about Señora Madora?” “She never lost power, but her house also has a backup generator, and I cleared it out just in case.” “Good.”

“You’re lucky that I made you stay.” “And you got lucky.” He laughs. “True. But, you seem like you are enjoying yourself as well.” “I am.” “You hungry yet?” “Starved.” “Let’s see what Señora Madora has stashed away.” We walk into the kitchen and rummage through the fridge. I spot a package of organic turkey hot dogs. “Hey, we could roast weenies over the fire in the sitting room. Perfect.” The Tsar gives me a raised eyebrow look. I laugh, “What’s that look for?” “You want weenies for dinner?” “What’s wrong with that?” I ask, still laughing. “OK, Anna, for you. I think see Señora Madora got those for my nephews, but if that makes you happy.” “It does.” In the end, besides the hotdogs, we find some Bratwurst and potatoes, which we wrap in foil for roasting in the fire. The Tsar pulls out another tray, mixing measured amounts of ginger beer, lime juice and vodka, and pours it into ice filled copper cups. He mixes them up at the bar, and we take our stash into the sitting room. The Tsar sets about building a fire in the fireplace. “We need roasting sticks. Do you have any Valentin?”

“Outside under the grill. I can get them in a minute once the fire gets going.” “I can get them. I’ll be back.” I pop up and head down the hall. The lamps cast an eerie glow, especially since the rest of the house is dark. I stride quickly, wondering if I should tell the Tsar I will be sleeping down here tonight. Coming to the double wide doors, I unlock them and head out into the biting cold evening air. The full moon is already rising, and the greyness of the early afternoon is gone. The sky is a beautiful deep blue color, permeated by the red of the sunset in the West. The grill is covered in a deep mound of snow, and I dust it off and find the tools. I pick two and head back inside. The fire is burning cheerily when I return, and I find the Tsar standing with his back to the fire talking animatedly to someone on the phone. He ends the call when he sees me enter. “My youngest brother,” he offers by way of explanation. “He wants to stay here for a while. He’s unemployed again. If I don’t give him a limit he will stay indefinitely.” The Tsar shrugs his shoulders, “someday he will grow up. But, enough about him.” He hands me a drink. “Cheers.” We clink glasses, and I take a delicious sip of the spicy concoction. I decide on a brat filled with apples and Vermont cheddar, and begin roasting it over the fire as I sip on my drink. It’s a peaceful atmosphere, with the fire burning in the grate, the potatoes in foil, the meat on wire forks roasting over the hot coals, and the lights turned low. The spicy drink warms my veins. I down it, and request another. “Anna likes Russian vodka? Yes?” he smiles at me appreciatively and pours me another. My brat takes a while to roast, and by the time it’s sizzling and brown and popping open, I’ve polished off another drink. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m nervous about what I want to talk about or what, but at least it takes the edge off. We sit in silence, for a while, looking into the fire and each thinking our separate thoughts. On my third drink, the Tsar raises eyebrows at me but says nothing. “I’m ready for a fairy tale,” I request. “Please tell me a Russian fairy tale, Valentin.” I position myself face down across the sofa, my ankles crossing in the air above me, resting my head on my hands.

“I don’t know if I know of any,” the Tsar says to me in his deep accented voice. “Make one up.” “For you, I’ll try.” I close my eyes and marvel at the sound of his voice, low and sensual. He begins. “Once upon a time, Anna, there lived a Tsar. He was one of the first Tsars of Russia and very little has ever been told about him. He was wild as a youth, untamed you might say. He sought after fame and fortune hither and yon, and he obtained it. But he was not liked very much by those around him. You see he was a selfish man and cared little for anyone other than himself. He left his kingdom in the hands of others and would venture to parts unknown for long periods of time. One day, on one of his ventures, he was walking in the woods alone. It was a very peaceful day and warm. The sun shone through the forest, lighting up the branches of trees and little blades of grass here and there. He didn’t pay much attention to these little, lovely things. He was thinking of the woman he wanted as his new Tsarina. You see, the one he was with was a very unhappy woman and nagged him constantly. He had every mind to drown her and take another. As he was thinking these thoughts, a big black crow swooped down in front of him, interrupting his thoughts. It was the largest crow he had ever seen and unusual for it had not black eyes as normal crows do, but pale blue ones like ice. They were eyes that could pierce your soul. So struck was the Tsar by this unusual bird, that he stopped in his tracks and stood stock still, simply observing it. After several moments, the bird spoke to him. ‘I have looked into your very soul’ it said, ‘and I see only blackness, but for one thing. I can see that you love your sister who was born without arms and is considered unmarriageable by the men of your kingdom. This is the one good thing in your heart. That alone will keep you from death on this day, but I warn you, your journey to change your heart will be treacherous, and you may well die.’ ‘Who sends you, asked the Tsar?’

‘The one who made us both,’ answered the crow. And he flew off, leaving the bewildered young Tsar to his thoughts. In time, he returned home and was every bit as wild, but for one thing. He began to love his Tsarina. She looked different when he returned to his castle, and he asked her why she was so different. She told him that she had been visited by a strange raven with ice blue eyes, and the raven had entrusted her with a secret and eternal life, but to obtain that, she must face one trial. Her trial became clear within one month. She was sent a wasting disease, and it left her deformed and ugly. But strangely enough, to the Tsar, she became more beautiful. There was something about her spirit that had changed. She became lovely in her innermost being. No longer the nagging, selfish wife. The raven visited her one last time and told her that she would soon die, but that she would be given eternal life and not to fear, for she had faced her trial. As the raven spoke, so it came to , within a year to the day, the Tsarina was dead. The Tsar mourned her for a time. And he began to change his selfish ways, but very slowly. He still ventured off, he still sought the favor of many women. But the Tsarina’s life and death had its effect on him. He began to see beauty differently. He began to take an interest in his kingdom, instead of leaving it frequently with others. On one of his adventures, he returned to the woods where he had first been visited by the raven and saw him for a second time. The raven looked into his soul again and told him he had changed, but that he had trials yet to face that would change him more and that would help his kingdom and his people. The Tsar missed his Tsarina, and he asked the raven if he would restore her life. ‘No.’ The raven answered him. ‘But there will be another. And this one will teach you the true meaning of love.’ Then the raven flew off before the Tsar could ask him her name. Feeling restless and unsatisfied, the Tsar went in search of this Tsarina that the raven spoke of, but he was at a loss. He met beautiful ladies, but for one reason or another these did not prove to be the Tsarina that the raven spoke of. Finally, giving up hope that he would find her, he returned to his castle and his duties as Tsar. Many years went by and the Tsar was aging and without an heir. Then one day as he was walking through his gardens, he came upon the

caretaker there. He was an old, wrinkled peasant man. The Tsar complimented him on the magnificent job he had done with the gardens and told him he would like to reward him for his work. ‘I will give you anything you desire,’ said the Tsar. The peasant man was grateful and had one request- that his only daughter be found a husband since he and his wife were aging, and they did not want her to be left alone in the world. Thinking that this might be a difficult thing indeed, especially if the daughter was as ugly as the caretaker, the Tsar nevertheless agreed. ‘Bring her by tomorrow,’ said the Tsar, ‘I will take a look at her and see what I can do.’ ‘I cannot bring her out in the sun, answered the caretaker, for her skin is very delicate and she may scorch her skin. The old caretaker looked at him directly, ‘If you cannot find her a husband, will you marry her yourself?’ The Tsar agreed, wanting to keep to his promise to the old man. The next day, the Tsar gathered his noblemen together and asked them if anyone of them would be up to the challenge of marrying the caretaker’s daughter. The Tsar promised them gold and land if any would be so brave as to marry this girl they had never laid eyes on. The nobles spoke among themselves. ‘I have heard she is quite ugly,’ said one. ‘Hideous’, said another, ‘that is why she must be kept hidden. ‘Is there no one here,’ said the Tsar, ‘who is brave enough to face this girl?’ ‘Imperator,’ said the oldest of the noblemen. ‘We believe this girl may have a deformity, she may not even be able to bear children. We respectfully decline your offer.’ The Tsar sent them away and considered the situation. He had given his word. He sent for the caretaker. When the wizened man appeared, the Tsar said to him, ‘I have a man to marry your daughter. You may bring her to the castle.’ ‘Honorable Tsar,’ said the caretaker, ‘I have one request. Her skin has never seen the harsh light of the sun. May I bring her under cover of darkness?’ ‘As you wish,’ said the Tsar. ‘And have her dressed in her wedding gown. The ceremony will be tomorrow evening.’ He said this, seeing there should be no reason for delay, and it would greatly alleviate the old man’s fears.

The next night the man and his wife arrived with their daughter under cover of darkness. The girl was covered from head to foot in white, and she was veiled so that the Tsar could not see her face. She stood before the Tsar trembling. They bowed before the Tsar, and the caretaker stepped forward. ‘Imperator, this is our only daughter, Annushka. May we ask who her bridegroom is?’ The Tsar stepped forward. ‘I am the bridegroom.’ The wife’s mouth dropped open in shock, and they hastily gave their thanks to the Tsar for taking care of their only daughter. Annushka stood before the Tsar, still shaking and silent beneath her veils. Clapping his hands, the Tsar commanded that the wedding ceremony begin. And so he wed Annushka, not knowing what strange fate may await him at her unveiling. As soon as the small wedding feast was over, she said goodbye to her parents and was taken with a servant to the wedding chamber where she awaited the Tsar. When all was ready, the Tsar entered, dismissing the servants. The Tsarina had her back to him, as he approached the bed. Thinking her shy, he moved carefully behind her and spoke gently to her. ‘Annushka, you have nothing to fear, I am your husband now.’ She turned slowly to him, still veiled. ‘Imperator,’ she beseeched him, ‘I have entered into this marriage to make my parents happy. They have been so kind to me and have always taken care of me from the time they had discovered me alone as a babe wandering through the woods. One thing I would ask you.’ ‘What is that Annushka?’ ‘That you love me, even if I am hideous to you.’ The Tsar swallowed hard. ‘I will.’ ‘Thank you for your kindness. You may unveil me now,’ she spoke with the air of a Tsarina, even though she was of poor origin. Slowly the Tsar lifted her veil and stood in shock as he looked into her face. Standing before him was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her skin was very pale and it radiated light. Her eyes were as blue as sapphires and her lips were as red as blood.

His blood went hot and cold. ‘You are not mortal,’ he guessed. ‘You have spoken correctly,’ answered the Tsarina. ‘You are a goddess sent to test me.’ ‘I am of both worlds, sent by the raven. For you have ed your final test. I am the Tsarina you have been waiting for.’ He went to her, and kissed her blood red lips, setting fire to his mouth and his blood. The Tsarina conceived that very night, and she bore him a son 9 months later. They loved each other very deeply and had many children and lived in peace for many years to come. And that is the end.” I turn over to face him, “That was an interesting story.” “I’m glad you liked it. I just made it up. In truth, I don’t know any Russian fairy tales. Our home life, as children, was not a golden one.” “I’m sorry.” I hesitate, wondering if I should ask about his father and about the scars on his back. “What were your parents like?” The Tsar shades his eyes from me and stands to pour himself another drink. He takes a straight shot of vodka and turns so that I can only see the side of his face. “My father was not there much, he was a lover of the bottle when he was home, which wasn’t often. He and my mother would fight.” He turns towards me, his face in shadow. “My mother made many sacrifices for us. I suppose my father loved us in his own way, but when he drank, he was not a happy man.” I stand up and move towards him, placing my hand on top of his larger one. “He hurt you.” “He went after Vladik, he was the smallest. I tried to protect him, but it was not always possible.” “I’m so sorry for what you went through. That must have been awful.” He says nothing more but accepts my protective embrace. I hold him with the

realization that it is the only thing I can do. No words would be adequate to undo the pain of his past. ***** Valentin Deep feelings stir inside me. I run my fingers through her silky hair and breathe in the scent of her, she might be independent, but her heart is comionate. I wonder what she would think if she knew the truth, that in one of my father’s rages, he had damaged my future ability to have babies. An ugly truth that makes me deeply sad and angry. I sit down on the ottoman in front of the fireplace, taking her hands and pulling her to me. I study her face, caressing her jaw line with my fingertips. She doesn’t know how beautiful I find her. I want to show her, grab ahold of this time with her so that when she leaves, I have these memories to hold onto. It’s too much to believe that she would want a future with me. But that’s all we have now. And I’m not going to waste it, thinking about what ifs. Unwanted feelings war inside me. Pain over the losses in my life, anger over the probable outcome of this encounter. Anna is different from most women I’ve met. Sweet, but tough, surprisingly independent, but not a player. I’ve never been one to run from a challenge, and I’m not going to now. Marina’s death showed me the incredible brevity of life, and I’m not going to waste the rest of mine dicking around with one-night stands and brief encounters. I’m going to show her how I feel and that’s going to scare her, I know that much. Looking deeply into her lovely eyes, I go for broke. “Anna, do you believe in love at first sight?” My words scare her. Her eyes go wide, searching mine for the truth. Trying to judge if I’m going to be there for her or if I’m using her for the moment. “I don’t know.” She casts her eyes downward, and then back up to meet my study gaze. Looking deeply into her eyes, I say to her, “Anna, I don’t want to scare you away from me by telling you this. I know you are a free-spirited woman, I like that about you. But I am falling for you. I hope you believe me when I say this Anna. I have never met a woman like you.”

***** Anna Liquid warmth spreads through my body as he speaks. His eyes convey truthfulness, and I feel weak with the weight of his words. This is unexpected. I hesitate, wondering what to say. Finally, the words stumble out awkwardly, “I have feelings for you too. I, I guess I’m not very good at speaking them. But we just met, and I’m not sure we should rush. I mean you live here, and I have my business in the South. What if it’s the storm? What if all this hadn’t happened? We were angry with each other last night, and I have read,” I pause, feeling embarrassed at this revelation, “that anger and ion are very closely related in the brain. What if we’re making a mistake? We don’t know each other that well.” As the words roll off my tongue, I wonder if I’m making a mistake by not allowing myself to it to him that I’m falling for him to, and I’m not sure I want to. “We’re not angry with each other right now, and you are sitting in a very intimate position with me Anna.” I blush. “That’s true.” “You itted to me that last night was your first night with a man, that you don’t normally do that sort of thing. But you made love with me again and again. So, I am guessing you must have some kind of feelings for me running through this mysterious mind of yours.” He smiles at me. “I do. I have feelings for you, but…” I stop. He stands up, holding me to him. I grip his shoulders, feeling the tautness of his muscles beneath his shirt. His physical strength turns me on. No one’s ever held me in this way, looked at me like this. He wants an intensity of union with me that I feel to my depths. It seems to transcend our physicality. I pull back and stare into his eyes. His pupils are wide enough to make his eyes look black. They suck me into him, incredibly enticing and demonic, all at the same time. It’s obvious that he has every intent to go upstairs with me, and I fight within myself to keep to my earlier decision. “I’m going to sleep down here.” The Tsar looks at me squarely, “As you wish.”

“I can walk Valentin.” “Humor me. I like to carry you around.” He heads for the room at the end of the long hall, gripping my ass cheeks with his hands. I grasp his biceps, marveling at his physical strength, and turned on by it. We reach the door, and he slides me down the length of his body to a standing position, his erect member digging into my belly. We stand, lips locked in a sensuous dance, his hand sliding down my back and coming to rest on the curve of my hips. My body is on fire, my clit beginning to throb. Reluctantly, I pull back, “We should go to bed.” “We should,” he agrees, walking me backwards towards the bed. “I mean, I’m going to bed.” “I’ll tuck you in.” We make out all the way to the bed, until I lie down on top of the comforter, sinking into its squishy softness. He leans over, his tongue crossing the barrier of my lips and mounts me, his weight pushing me into the duvet. His forceful kisses send waves of desire through every nerve cell in my body. And it responds with a mind of its own, like I can’t get enough of him. His erect cock presses into my groin, begging to be released from the confining space of his jeans. I’m fighting within myself to slow down, even as my body is screaming at me to let go and let nature take its course. His sensuous mouth comes down hard on mine. Kissing my lips, chin, ears, neck, and making a plunging descent to my cleavage. The rock hardness of his body on top of mine, gives way to intoxication, my back arches to meet his hips. Hips that push into the space between my thighs, making me ache and swell with lust for him. Buttons pop off, as he rips my shirt open with a quick vigorous thrust of his fingers, exposing my breasts. Enclosing a nipple with his lips and tongue, he sucks each twin as his fingers begin a slow stroking motion over the lips between my thighs.

He removes his clothes, his muscular body shining in the moonlight, revealing his rock-hard cock, protruding from his hips, like a sword ready to enter its sheath. He looks wild, savage. Knees spread, my pussy aching and swollen, my mind races. Somehow, he’s discovered some hidden part of me that I’m unaware of, some primal force within me that I cannot suppress. This ancient force takes over and takes control. It is rough and desirous and doesn’t give a flying fuck what anyone thinks about this situation. It knows, it directs, and I obey it. My logic side fights my primal side for control. I want this between us, I want him, and I’m terrified of this, whatever this is. I blurt out without thinking, despite how far we’ve already gone. “We should stop.” My body flushes, feeling his withdrawal as he steps away from me towards the window, as though I burned him with my words. “You want me to walk away from you right now?” The Tsar asks me, his eyes diabolical in the darkened room. ***** Valentin It takes every ounce of self-control I have in my body to stop myself. Somehow, her words finally in some tiny part of my brain. She said she wanted to stop. Somehow, I need to gather my clothes up and tear out of this room before I do something, we both regret. I want to take her so bad that it hurts. I hold the sides of my head with my hands and walk towards the window. “Anna, you’re killing me. You said you wanted to stop. I want to give you what you want. I’ll stop.” My rebellious cock doesn’t get the memo, it remains standing at attention. “Valentin, I saw the picture of your wife in your drawer. You’re hiding the pain of your loss; I don’t want to lead you on. I won’t be here in three weeks, and I don’t know what will happen with us. I don’t want to hurt you or me.” “This right here hurts, Anna. Getting it going and then stopping hurts. There’s no guarantee in life, only the moment. I know it well, but I’m not going to push on you to give in to me. I want to, but I won’t.” I turn towards her. Her thighs are spread, her body looking like a ripe fruit,

waiting to be plucked and devoured. “Valentin.” She exhales, and then whispers, “You’re right. I don’t want to stop either. Come back.” I move back to the bed and gently pull off her panties. She doesn’t attempt to argue or resist, she wants me, and I know it. She’s scared. I know that too. Our attraction is intense. “You’re scared.” She nods her head, her eyes like wide liquid pools in the moonlight. I lower myself towards her slowly, inserting my cock into the tight space of Anna’s pink velvet pussy. It’s slick with invitation. I push the fullness of myself into the narrow slit between her thighs, making her moan with pleasure. “Oh.” I begin with slow deliberate thrusts. She looks up at me, a determined, intense look written across her face. “Valentin.” She whispers my name. I slow my pace. I hope to heaven she hasn’t changed her mind. “Anna?” “I need you to give it to me hard.” “My god, woman.” I watch as she deliberately sends her tongue around the edge of her lips. I don’t need any extra encouragement, I fuck her hard, covering her mouth with mine, and making her frenzied with desire. Legs spread wide for me, toes in the air, her hips rock with my thrusts. The headboard slams the wall, and she moans with abandon at every push of my engorged prong. When she can no longer take anymore, she rolls on top of me and directs the thrust, until she skims the surface of bliss and finally plunges into an explosion of pleasure that makes her cry out. I reverse our positions and resume hammering, simultaneously unleashing my own climactic force, driving my hard cock between her legs, sending my ejaculate deep inside her. I collapse on top of

her, breathing heavily. Heart pounding, I whisper in her ear. “Anna, I love you.” “I love you too.” she says it. On some level perhaps, it’s true. On another level, we both know it hasn’t been tested by life. I hope we aren’t lying to each other. We lie together till we fall asleep, the comforter around both of us in a tight cocoon, shutting out the worries of the world. Every time she stirs, I awake, hard and aroused. Bed creaking, I mount her again and again.

Chapter 12

Anna The next morning dawns bright and clear, I wake to the sunlight streaming through the French doors and the feel of Valentin behind me, holding me in a tight embrace. My pussy is sore, a reminder of the all-night lovemaking sessions. My intentions to be a ‘good girl’ are shot to hell. “Good morning Tsarina.” “Good morning.” I turn over to look at him. “Do you still respect me?” I say, part in jest, part serious. “Anna,” he pauses to give me an exasperated look. “Yes.” I laugh as he grabs me and tickles me. “Anna this is not a complicated thing. I love you, you love me. That is the bottom line.” I stare at him, wondering at myself, wondering at him. Can we really love each other in such a short space of time? Is this simply overpowering lust that we have between us? And am I afraid to own this part of myself? Yeah, I am. Good girls don’t act this way, unless we’re in love, right? But, I’m not sure, I’m so good anymore. He grips my face in his hands, his kindly eyes becoming serious, “Who hurt you so bad that you don’t want to let me in?” I turn away from him. “Anna please tell me. I will knock his block off.” It makes me laugh again, and I turn back towards him. “I would have liked to do that myself at the time.” “What did he do to you?” I look up at the ceiling. The Tsar wraps his arms around me and waits. “He was my first boyfriend. I didn’t have a boyfriend until I went to college. My parents divorced when I was beginning high school, and I gained a lot of weight. I didn’t feel attractive, and I was shy back then, so I kept to myself. I still had the weight in college, but I met some great friends and they accepted me for me, you know? It helped me get out of my shell. And then I met a great guy, or at least I

thought he was.” The Tsar interrupts with a low guttural enunciation that sounds like a growl. I turn towards him and laugh. “I don’t like the sounds of him already. But keep going, I want to know. I want to know everything about you.” “His name is Jason, and he asked me out, and I thought we got along really well. I think it was partly because I didn’t want to it there were any problems. We went to a Bible college, and there are strict rules there about dating, but after a year I decided that I was ready to, you know, give it up.” I rush on, the memories still hurting a little. “The day I was going to surprise him at his apartment, I found him there with another girl. And that was pretty much it.” “He wasn’t just making out?” “Nope. I got the full frontal and side view. But that helped me get over him quickly. Like then and there quick, you know?” The Tsar runs his hands possessively over my body. “I’m sorry that you went through that Anna. The bastard didn’t see the Angel he had right in front of him.” He pulls me to him, and I lie sprawled on top of him, my head resting on his chest. His body is warm and comforting. I allow him to hold me, pushing away the bad memories. “Bible college?” “Yes.” I smile. “My mom pushed it on me, she wanted me to meet a nice guy in college. And I went along with it. But I transferred schools after that, and I did my own thing. It was my wake-up call, you could say.” “Selfishly, I’m glad you didn’t meet Mr. Right in college.” “Me too.” I’m quiet, enjoying the feel of his body beneath mine, until I hear the clicking sound of the middle doors in the Hall being unlocked, and then, a woman singing in Spanish.

“Oh my God, Señora Madora! Quick, hide!” I duck under the covers, not wanting Señora Madora to see us together in this state. He erupts in laughter, calling jauntily, “Good morning Señora Madora!” “Good morning Valentin!” She says cheerfully, in her heavily accented voice. She breaks into song once more, as she continues down the hall. I pop my head out from beneath the covers, “Oh my god.” He’s laughing at me. I jab him in the ribs. “Do you think she saw me?” “Anna, this is your room ?” He’s still laughing. It makes me laugh too, “That was so embarrassing. She’s going to think I’m a slut.” I run my hands through my hair. “Did you know she was coming over now?” “Anna, relax. Señora Madora is a very discreet woman. She knows the ways of the world, don’t be worried, I’m sure she’ll say nothing. At the very least, I don’t think she’ll call your parents about it,” he teases. I punch his arm, and he wraps me in a tight hold, pinning me to the bed. “You are a spirited one, aren’t you?” At this moment, we both hear Señora Madora ’s voice approaching our room. I duck back under the covers. “Breakfast in 20 minutes, is that acceptable?” she asks the Tsar. “Very good Señora Madora,” he answers. “Good morning Anna,” she calls over her shoulder in her singsong voice, as she heads back down the Hall. I blush a deep red, popping out once again. “She saw me.” We’re still laughing about it, as we head upstairs to get dressed. I find my clothes hanging where I left them, after the previous day’s romp in the snow, dry and stiff. Looking out the window, I notice that far down the mountain I can see plows moving about, clearing the roads. Today I will go home.

The morning es quickly. Valentin needs to take care of some business concerns, and I linger over coffee in the kitchen with Señora Madora. “How long have you lived here Señora Madora?” “About five years.” “Where are you from?” “Texas. I answered a business ad in a magazine. I was looking to get far away from my ex-husband.” She makes a swirling motion in the air over her head, indicating he was crazy. “My sons are in the military and live all over the globe, and I needed a place of my own. This is ideal, I have my own place, and Valentin, he is a good man. He takes care of his employees.” Señora Madora stops and looks at me. “He’s your first?” I blush, taken aback by the question. “Excuse me?” “It’s okay Anna. I see things.” She gently lays her hand across mine, looking at me intently. “The gift of seeing runs in my family. I saw you Anna, before you came here.” “You saw me?” I ask, incredulous. “Sometimes I see things when I look at people, it runs in my head like a vision. It is nothing to fear, everyone has a little ability. Some more than others.” “You’re saying you can see the future?” “Sometimes. I knew before Valentin’s wife went to the doctor that she would get very sick and die. I didn’t tell them, there is no point in worrying someone.” “What was wrong with her?” “She had cancer of the breast. It came on suddenly. Six months later, she was dead.” “That’s sad, she was so young.” “Yes. Very.”

“What was she like?” “She was a difficult woman when I first met her. Not happy. She wanted a child, as did he. She was going through fertility treatments, and he had the surgeries, but it wasn’t working, and she was quite upset about it.” “I guess that would be hard to deal with if you wanted a child and you couldn’t have one.” “It was, especially for her. She was a proud woman, incredibly beautiful too, Marina was. But she mellowed after the cancer. It changed her, it changed him too. He loved her better after the illness. I think he grew up then. When I first came to this household, they would argue a lot, he would leave, drink with his guys, not come home. He ignored her a lot, would throw himself into his business.” “How sad to work things out and then to lose each other.” “That is the way of life. Learning our lessons. He was heartbroken when she died. He kept to himself after that, I think he blames himself at times for her death. You, Anna, are the first woman he has brought home since Marina’s death.” “Why did he have surgery?” “He didn’t tell you?” “No.” Señora Madora turns away and busies herself with things in the kitchen. I think she’s going to ignore my question, and by now I’m interested. At that moment, a chill sweeps through my body. Señora Madora looks at me sharply. “Are you chilled Anna? I can make you some tea.” She reaches into the cupboard and pulls out a packet of decaffeinated herbal tea. “This is the kind Marina used to drink when she was trying to get pregnant. She got it from a homoeopathic doctor. He said it would help her.” “No, thanks Señora Madora. I’m a coffee drinker.”

She comes over to me. “Anna,” she hesitates, about to go on. I have the most curious feeling that she is going to say something about my future when the Tsar comes in from the cold, greets us in his deep voice, and kisses me on the cheek. ***** Valentin Señora Madora looks like she just swallowed a canary. I shake my head in her direction. What in God’s name is the woman telling Anna? I don’t need her saying anything that’s going to drive a wedge between us. Señora Madora predicted a baby for the two of us, and she has no trouble telling people about her visions. I must get Anna out of here before Señora Madora says anything. The prediction can’t possibly be true, but as I glance at Anna, I allow the image to slide through my mind’s eye. Anna, swollen belly, carrying my baby. Just the thought makes me horny as hell, and then the truth of the situation comes back to me. I shoot blanks, and the truth fucking hurts. “Anna, want to go for a walk in the snow before we drive to your place to get your things? The roads will be clear soon, but I know how you like to play in the snow,” I smile at her. “Yeah, sounds good.” She hops up and places her mug in the sink. “Thank you for breakfast and the conversation Señora Madora.” “You’re welcome, Anna.” Señora Madora gives me a serious look, “Don’t let her get chilled.” I give her a silencing look that means, not another word. “I’ll take care of her Señora Madora.” I wink at Anna. We head out into the cold, the air is crisp, but the sun is shining, reflecting almost blindingly off the snow. We head for the cleared path at the edge of the woods. I grab her hand and hold on tightly. “What did she say to you Anna?”

She gives me an odd look. “Nothing, just girl talk. Why?” “She offered you Marina’s pregnancy tea.” “Yeah. It’s OK. I didn’t drink it; besides, we’re protected.” “You have no idea.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” She pauses and looks me directly in the eye. “Oh. Wait. I get it. Don’t worry. I won’t touch Marina’s stuff.” She holds up her free hand. I face her. “No. It’s not that.” She touches my arm. “I understand why you would keep her things around. It reminds you of her, you loved her, and I get that. Believe me, I do. Losing my Nana isn’t the same as losing your wife, but I understand why you want to have things of hers. It’s normal.” She shrugs. I stare at her, amazed. Anna is remarkably kind. I wasn’t expecting this at all. “I’m not going to drink the tea. Don’t worry.” “I shouldn’t have left you alone with Señora Madora.” “She didn’t mean to offend you. I’m sure. Don’t worry. If she offers me something of your wife’s, I’ll say no. OK?” “That’s not it, Anna.” “OK?” She looks at me, puzzled. “What is it?” “Don’t be weirded out with what I have to tell you.” She scrunches her brows together. “I’ll try.” “Señora Madora means well, but she did this thing for me when Marina was trying to get pregnant. Did a ritual to a Saint or something, and she’s convinced it will work.” “What are you saying?”

“That’s why she was offering you the tea.” “Oh.” Anna raises her eyebrows. “So, you’re not offended that it was your wife’s tea?” “No. I was just worried about what she discussed with you.” “I don’t believe in stuff like that. But don’t worry, I’m not much of a tea drinker anyway. It’s coffee for me.” “Did she tell you anything else?” “Not really. I like her, she seems like a good person.” “OK.” I look at the ground, relieved for the moment. It appears as if Señora Madora hasn’t spoken of her future knowings. That’s good. “Wait a second, that is weird. Why would she offer me that tea?” I shake my head, barely containing the broad smile that comes to my face. “I don’t know.” But I do know, and I don’t want to tell her.

Chapter 13

Anna My driveway is clear, but the path to the kitchen is covered in three feet of snow. Valentin helps me clear a path to the house and the woodshed and uncover my Jeep. When we clear enough of the white stuff away, we lean on our shovels and look out at the frosted pines lining the drive. “I have to take care of business this afternoon, but I was thinking Anna, that I could take some time off, and we could do something fun together like ski or take a ride on my snowmobile. Interested?” “Yeah, I love to. I’ve never been skiing or snowmobiling before. I want to go sledding too, not much opportunity in the South.” My smile is broad, I love to try new things. “I want you to know Anna, that you’re always welcome in my home.” “Thank you. And thanks for having me over for days. Even though,” I add, one eyebrow cocked, “you basically kidnapped me and forced me to stay.” “Don’t give me any ideas,” he moves towards me and takes me in his arms. “I want you to stay with me while you’re here.” “I think I should stay here.” “I hope I can change your mind.” He leans down to my level and kisses my lips gently. My senses thrum at his touch, at his enticing, after shaved, masculine scent. His erect cock pushes against my belly. For an older man, he’s got it going on that’s for sure. “You’re hard.” “Can’t help it.” “Yeah, I know. I’m still feeling it from last night. I’m sore.” His hands grip my waist, but reluctantly, he pulls back at my words. It gives me a rush, knowing that he’s got all this pent-up sexual need that he keeps in check because of me and my needs. I chalk that up to age and wisdom, something that

was always in short supply with other men that I dated. I experience the loss of his lips and his body as soon as he pulls away. It doesn’t seem to matter that I’m sore. My body responds to his, it’s undeniable. “I better head for work.” “OK.” “It’s hard to leave you.” “Eat here tonight. I’ll make you something. Six?” “I’ll be here.” The Tsar lifts me off the ground, giving me a tight squeeze and a hard kiss on the mouth. I wave at him, watching his truck as it heads down the road. It’s time to take care of some things, like calling my parents and the Bennett’s. I head into the nearby town to get cell reception and buy a few items for dinner. Once on Main Street, I dial my mother’s number, she answers on the first ring. “Mom?” “Anna! I thought that might be you. I was so worried about you.” “I was fine Mom.” “I heard you stayed with a friend of the Bennett’s.” “How did you? Never mind. Yes, I stayed with a friend of theirs, he lives above me on the mountain with his live-in housekeeper. They are the nice neighborly sort.” “I’m glad for that, they told me that he has his own generator, but I was so worried about you dear. What if you’d stayed in Nana’s cabin and the power had gone out?” “Mom, I would have been fine, I have lots of wood to burn.” “Anna, one day you will have a child, and you will understand.”

I roll my eyes. “How’s Dad?” “He’s golfing. He’s been worried about you too, honey. Anna I’m so glad you called. I miss you.” “I miss you too.” I hang up and head to LeJardin, a local convenience store at the base of the mountain. The store has some quaint features, like homemade jellies, handmade items of quilts, mugs, and jewelry, as well as ski rentals and ads for Jay Peak. I peruse it all, finally picking up a package of chicken, some flour, Crisco, baking soda, and stand in front of the drink case scanning the wine. Halfway through my search, I begin to have the feeling that I’m being watched. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a tall male figure with blonde hair. Thinking I’m in his way, I look at him to excuse myself. He’s staring at me. “I’m sorry, am I in your way?” I say to the young man before me. He’s very handsome, but there’s something in his eyes that makes me uncomfortable. “Not at all. I was just iring the view from here.” His deep voice contains the trace of a Russian accent. I nod slightly, taken aback by his forwardness, and go back to studying the wine bottles, feeling the scrutiny of his eyes perusing my body. “Are you new in town?” He asks me. “I think I detect a southern accent.” He smiles broadly at me, not seeming to care that I’m not appearing to be interested in his attention or conversation. “Just visiting.” I grab a bottle of wine, trying to make a quick escape, but he steps directly in front of me, blocking my way. “I am Vladik.” He extends his hand towards mine. “I’m in a hurry.” I ignore his hand and step around him. “Excuse me.” “If you need someone to show you around town, let me know Anna.” I hesitate at the mention of my name. How does he know my name? It can’t be, I don’t want it to be.

“I would be glad to show you a few things.” I pay for my items and hurry out the door before he can head me off again. I hope it’s not who I think it is. But his accent is similar to Valentin’s. I think to the conversation we had about his younger brother. He said he wouldn’t be here till Thursday or Friday, hadn’t he? I wonder about it on the drive back up the mountain and then push it out of my mind. After unloading the groceries, I set to work on preparing the biscuits and gravy and put them in the fridge to cook later. A search of the cupboard reveals more dusty Wedgewood plates, I wash them and set them out to dry. Finally, it’s time for lunch, and I sit down with jars of peanut butter and honey and make myself a sandwich. The house is so quiet. There are several tasks to be done. I turn on the radio and listen to some rock while I strip the bed and place fresh sheets and a comforter. There’s a trunk at the foot of the bed and out of curiosity, I open it, pleasantly surprised by what I see. On the top, addressed to me, is a note. My Dearest Anna, If you are reading this, then I am no longer with you on this earth. But if we do live on, which I suspect we do, then I am sure I will be hovering about you from time to time. I am so glad that you are my Granddaughter. I knew from the start that you were special. The first time I held you in my arms, you smiled at me. Little rosebud mouth, beautiful blue eyes. Yes, you were beautiful even as a baby. And now you are quite grown up and beautiful on the inside and out. I watched you grow up, and I knew that we shared a special bond. Your artistic side is similar to mine, Anna. I hope you foster that side in you because it is a great gift to the world. I am gratefully happy to have seen you develop your talents. This trunk contains a few of my journals, some of my art, and a few souvenirs from around the world that hold special meaning for me. I want you to have these things because I knew you of all people would appreciate them. I have a feeling that this place is the right thing for you Anna. I always needed a place to get away and think, and hopefully it will be the same for you. I am very proud of you for starting your own business and giving it your all. You are a motivated and determined woman, and those qualities have served you well.

Sometimes though, we all need to take time to just think and be. My love, enjoy. Know that I always have loved you so very much, and I always will. Love, Nana XOXOXOXOXOXOX Tears well up in my eyes. I sit for a while, thinking of memories with Nana. The good times, many good times. I tuck the note into my travel bag and return to the trunk. There are more journals, trinkets from various parts of the world, an old doll in period dress, and a wallet, which upon inspection, reveals coins and bills of different nationalities. I want to take a closer look at the journals, but it’s getting late in the day. Time to take a bath and get ready for dinner. I strip down while the tub fills, throw a handful of salt crystals into the tub and sink inside. The water is heavenly, I lean my head against the lip of the tub, thoughts drifting to the experiences of the past two days, beginning with our first encounter. What a surprising turn of events. What if it hadn’t snowed? What if I had just accepted the room instead of trying to steal his truck? I pause, thinking about the consequences of that. Him running after me in the snow, carrying me up to his room like some barbarian warrior. That was hot, to me, anyway. I sink my head under the water, overwhelmed with thoughts of the future. Valentin has put a monkey wrench in my ideas. I’d not been expecting to meet anyone, especially not here. And now what? Realistically, how can this work? I’m in over my head, and nothing has prepared me for this. How is it that I feel so much emotion for someone I just met? Dating in college was different, it wasn’t even close to the feelings I have at this moment, but then again, they were college boys. The Tsar is a man, an incredible man. A man that knows what he wants. That’s sexy. But what now? I can’t undo the bliss of the past two days, and I want more. It isn’t smart, I know that. At base level, I know I’m having a giant rush of biological neurochemicals designed to get us together. But, how can something like this last? After shaving my legs, I get out and towel off, heading into the bedroom to find clean clothes. Slathering on some scented body lotion, I think about what to wear tonight. There isn’t much of a choice. It’s mostly jeans and tees and two

nice tops. My black strappy tank shows too much cleavage, so I settle on a gray cotton tee shirt and jeans and a white fur lined hoodie. The fake fur feels soft against my skin, and a happy feeling rolls through me, pushing away fearful thoughts of what the future will bring. The time I have with Valentin is limited, I might as well enjoy it. By 4:00 PM, I get the fire started and sit down on the sofa to read. It’s the same as before, I can’t concentrate on the words, I’m too excited for this evening and can hardly wait to see Valentin again. Hopping up, I walk into the kitchen and snap on the radio, dancing around as I set the table. The task is quickly done, and I carry the radio into the living room and dance in front of the fire. Right outside my picture window, the sun sinks lower in the sky. It’s nearly five, time to put the food in the oven. I turn the knob on the old gas stove and let it Preheat, heading for the bathroom to brush my teeth as the oven warms up. Glancing in the mirror, I notice that my eyes look larger than normal. Nerves. I brush my teeth twice, apply some cherry lip gloss, and run my fingers through my hair. Heading back to the kitchen, I pop the chicken and biscuits in the oven, noticing that it doesn’t even feel warm when I open the door. Great. I check the back of the stove, it’s plugged in. Something isn’t working. I reach my hand in and feel around. No heat. I try the burners and can’t get them to light either. There is no microwave, so that is out. Just then, there’s a knock at the door. Valentin. A rush of happiness speeds through my brain at the sight of him. He leans down, embraces me, and tastes my lips. The warmth of his mouth contrasts with the biting cold of his jacket. I inhale the scent of his aftershave, as I run my fingers through his luxuriant hair. “You taste good.” “It’s cherry lip gloss.” “I like it. I like this too,” he says, fingering my fake fur hood. “you look like a snow bunny.” I laugh. “I have something to tell you.” I say looking up at him. “What?”

“I think the oven is broken. I made southern chicken and biscuits, but I have no way to bake it.” Valentin walks over to the oven, checking to see if it’s plugged in. “I checked that.” He opens the oven door. “Did you light the pilot?” “What’s that?” “Down here.” He shows me, pulling out a lighter and igniting the flame. “Now it’ll heat up for you.” He takes me in his arms. “You just need me to light your fire, Anna.” “Had a feeling you were going to say that.” “That was bad wasn’t it?” “Gah, yes. That was a terrible line. But I know you had to say it anyway.” I grin at him. I stick the food in the oven, and we retire to the leather sofa to sip our wine and watch the flames dance in the fireplace. “I talked to my Mom today.” “How is she?” “They’re doing well. They knew I stayed with you. So that relieved their worries.” “News travels fast. The Bennett’s must have called them.” “It does, I told her you had a live-in housekeeper.” “But not that she has a separate house?” “It might seem strange. Though, they probably think you are an older man. Like a Grandfather or something.”

“Would your parents have a problem with you dating an older man?” He looks directly into my eyes. “I don’t know. I’ve never dated anyone older. And I haven’t really dated at all since college, though my mom tries to hook me up now and then.” “Why is that?” “I just haven’t had the time really. The business took a lot to start. It was a lot of hours, and I come from a relatively small place so there aren’t that many people to date. A lot of guys are either married or if they’re not they don’t want to get married anytime soon. They just want to play around and be boys. Guys that are on their second time around, really are just out for a good time or have too much baggage.” I consider what I just said. “No offense to you. I’m just speaking of the guys in the south.” “And you would want to get married?” “I would eventually. It’s not something you can really plan around because it’s partly a matter of meeting the right person at the right time.” “What about children?” “I would like to have kids, and definitely more than one. Being an only child has its advantages, but it was lonely at times, and I always wanted a sister that I could talk to and hang out with. One of my good friends from back home comes from a family of 6, and I loved going over to her house because it was so lively. There was always something going on. The siblings had their fights, but they loved each other and would do anything for each other. What about you? You come from a big family, at least compared to today’s standards of 2.2 children.” “In my younger, wilder days, I didn’t think I wanted children. My father was away a lot, and when he was home, he favored my oldest brother, Antonine. He is the one residing in New York, we started the tech company together. Antonine’s the responsible oldest brother, more like a father than my biological father. My mother had to work extremely hard to us, especially after we moved to the US. My father left her for another woman-the sea, adventure…” he trails off for a moment, thinking. I can see there is pain there that he’s trying to hide.

“In my 20s, I very much did not want children, and then when I did, it was not to be.” He shrugs his shoulders. “But I have hopes for the future, and you…” He is interrupted by a loud pounding on the kitchen door. I look at him, startled. “I’m not expecting anyone.” We both head to the kitchen. Red and blue lights flash outside. The Tsar opens the door to a uniformed police officer. “Jerry?” “Valentin, you’ve had a break in at your home. We tried calling your cell, but there was no answer. Señora Madora informed us that you would be here.” He nods in my direction. “The suspect claims he is a family member. We need you to identify him.” Valentin turns to me. “Let me straighten this out quickly, I’ll come back as soon as I can. I’m sorry.” He leans over and kisses me. “It’s fine, if you can’t get back, I understand.” “Make sure you lock up, Anna.” ***** Valentin An hour later, I return, apologetic. “I’m sorry for the delay Anna.” My cock stiffens at the sight of her in her fur lined hoodie, soft, cuddly, and a mix of enticing fruity scents. I take her in my arms and hold her tightly. “What happened?” “My brother broke in through the back door, and the alarm system triggered the call to the police.” “Why’d he break in?” “He tried to call my cell, but I switched it off since I was here, and it seems that he couldn’t wait, so he decided to break in. He wasn’t supposed to be here until Thursday.” My irritation rises.

“This is your younger brother?” “Yes, Vladik. The irresponsible one. You’ll meet him.” “I think I did kind of meet him already.” She says slowly. “At LeJardin. He was…” She stops. I can’t contain the scowl that comes to my face. My brother is fast and loose with women, basically, on the constant lookout for his next hookup. “What did he say to you Anna?” “Nothing much. Somehow, he knew who I was because he called me by name, but I was in a hurry, and I didn’t know he was your brother…” She trails off. I can see that she’s trying to minimize the encounter with my brother, and I’m pissed. My younger brother is going to get a few choice words from me when I see him. Anna cuts into my dark thoughts. “Why don’t we eat? It might be kind of crispy by now, but I’m starving.” She fixes our plates, pours me another glass of wine, and we sit quietly at first, devouring the chicken and biscuits. “Anna, this is very good.” “You’re lying, but thank you. It got a little dried out.” It was a little dry, but it’s good, the fact that she invited me and cooked for me, means that her barriers are coming down a bit. After dinner we sit by the fire, snuggled together, feet up on the wooden coffee table. “You were telling me about your siblings when you left,” She smiles up at me. “And now I know a little more, like your youngest brother is impatient.” “That’s probably a family trait. Like right now, I’m impatient kiss you.” Thoughts of my brother interacting with Anna cause a jealous surge in my veins. It makes my blood boil, I want to possess her, drive my cock into her so deep, that she screams my name. Just the thought makes my cock stiffen uncomfortably. It takes great effort to slow down and touch her gently when what I want to do is take her with forcefulness.

My fingers intertwine with her silky blond hair, I brush it back from her face and lift her chin upwards, studying her features. She leans towards me, and we kiss, as I caress her hair, inhaling the freshly shampooed, rose washed scent of her. She parts her lips for me, and I move my tongue between the soft velvety surfaces. I pull her onto my lap, my bulging cock lodging between the juncture of her thighs. Her tight jeans hug the curves of her ass, and I grip each globe with an appreciative squeeze. I’m impatient to be with her, and she gives me every indication that she is impatient to be fucked, despite her previous words to the contrary. She cups my face with her hands and runs her fingers through my hair, pulling back to study my face. “You’re a beautiful man, and I don’t mean just on the outside. I like the fact that you care take care of your family.” “That means a lot. Thanks.” Her words give me a warm feeling and add to the surging, lust filled drive raging on my insides. Taking that as my cue, I pick her up and proceed towards the fur rug that lies before the fireplace. I lay her on the rug and begin to unbutton my shirt. There are no curtains to cover the window, and anyone can look in and see us, but it doesn’t matter, I could care less. I want to claim this woman as my own, and if anyone sees, they will know that this woman is mine. There’s a negative voice in my head that tells me I will never have her permanently, that she views me as a vacation hookup, nothing more, especially if she finds out my secret. Anna gives me a wide-eyed look. There’s no sign that she’s having second thoughts, like she had last night. She wants me and that makes me immensely happy. I stare at her for a moment. A mere three days ago we hadn’t known of each other’s existence. How can I feel this way? How can she? It is as if this moment is timeless, and we’ve loved each other forever. “Contemplating the secrets of the universe?” Anna grins at me. It makes me laugh. “I’m just thinking that I’m happy I met you.”

“Me too.” Kneeling between her thighs, I unzip her hoodie, and push her T shirt and bra up so I can take in the view of her luscious breasts, nipples taut and firm on top of the enormous globes they sit on. I unzip her jeans and reach in to fondle her pussy through her panties and suck at her breasts. She warms to my touch and I slide my tongue down over her belly to her pussy lips and clit, savoring the taste of her, until she’s panting and swollen, hips thrusting against my tongue and face, ready for my entrance. I rip off her jeans and panties and throw them onto the leather sofa. She spreads her knees, allowing me to drive my cock past the swollen pink outer lips that mark the entrance to her slick, constricting pussy. “Oh. OH! Anna moans as I enter her, and it drives me wild. It takes everything in me not to cum immediately. To prevent myself from coming, I withdraw slightly. Her hips rise to meet mine, and our lips lock and hold. Our movements become frenzied, and we flip positions. Her tits bounce above me, driving me mad, glowing from reflected firelight as she rides me with furious hip thrusts, grinding her swollen clit against my public bone until her ass cheeks contract and her strokes flurry into a crescendo of thrusts as she comes undone. My swollen shaft can’t take anymore, buried in her so deep, her pussy contracting around me so tightly that I shoot my cum deep inside her as she climaxes. She collapses onto me, heart pounding, breathing hard. I cannot imagine a greater Heaven than this one. The next thought that surfaces in my brain is one I don’t want to acknowledge. That this is going to be absolute hell when she leaves me for her southern home.

Chapter 14

Anna The sun is streaming through the window when I awake, and briefly, I wonder where I am. Realization floods my memory, and my thoughts return to last night. I’m sore and tired, but in a good way. The bed is empty, and momentarily, I miss the feeling of Valentin’s arms around me. In the south, helping start and run the business gave me little time to think about even experiencing something like this, and now, I’m beginning to think that I don’t want to live without it ever again. The coffee pot is making the reassuring sounds of its brewing cycle. Tripping over my boots, I stumble to my clothes and hurriedly get dressed, throwing on clothes from the day before. There’s a bite in the air that I don’t feeling before now, like the heat isn’t working. “Good morning Anna.” The Tsar’s rich voice drifts up to me from the basement. “Good morning Valentin. What are you doing down there?” “I’m checking the oil. And it looks as though you have run out. Unfortunately for you and your plans stay here.” He says, as he mounts the stairs. “Did you monkey with it?” My brows lift. “Anna,” he laughs, “do you really think me capable of plotting anything like that?” “Yes.” I cock one eyebrow at him, and we both laugh. “I can’t believe you just said that.” He raises his greasy hands and comes towards me, “Come here darling.” I shriek and jump out of his way, laughing as I move towards the coffee pot. Quick as lightning, Valentin smacks the seat of my jeans, leaving a greasy handprint on my backside. “What have you done? Oh, you’ve started a war. I haven’t had my morning coffee, and you’re throwing it down already.”

“Now what will Señora Madora say when she does the laundry?” He puts on a falsetto female voice with a fake Spanish accent. “That hussy southern girl has a man print on the seat of her jeans, she must have been having dirty sex again.” The look on his face is one of great enjoyment. “You really suck!” I march out of the house and return with a packed snowball which I throw towards his head. “I’m going to wipe that smirk off your face!” It narrowly misses and hits the cabinet with force. “Whoa! She’s got an arm on her.” The Tsar taunts me. “But unfortunately for you, I have speed. Just wait till I get my hands on you.” He wriggles his greasy hands and bounds towards me. I shriek and flee the room, heading for the bathroom, but he gets to me before I reach safety. He grabs me at the waist, pulls me back towards him and places his hands on my thighs, wiping the grease off onto my legs and moving his hand upwards between my legs. “What will Señora Madora say now, Anna? You will have her blushing, no doubt.” “You are despicable!” I whip around, a little mad, as I look down at my jeans. “Look what you did! You’ve ruined them.” “Don’t be a sour puss. That is what young ladies get when they don’t think to check their oil when they’re staying in a very cold climate that they are not used to.” He gives me a reproving look with raised eyebrows. “I’ll order more. It can’t be that big of a deal.” “Anna, do you know the wait time for getting oil around here?” He looks down at me with a hint of a smile around his mouth. “No, I don’t. And stop looking at me like I’m an airhead. I was busy with work and didn’t even think about it before I came up here.” He crosses his arms. “Never called you that. But you know, it doesn’t hurt to listen to the people around that care about you.” I wave my arm at him in a dismissive gesture. This adventure to the North is not anything like what I had been expecting. “You look like such a disciplinarian right now.”

“Why? Because I want to spank you?” “You wouldn’t.” “I want to.” “You like a little kink, don’t you?” I shake my head and move to the coffee maker. I pour myself a full mug, adding a lot of cream and sugar. Taking the roll of paper towels, I tear off a bunch and place them on the wooden chair before taking a seat. Valentin remains there, arms crossed. “Stop looking at me like that. It’s too early in the morning. You’re the one that deserves a spanking. You’ve ruined my jeans. It’s a good thing these aren’t my favorite.” “Señora Madora can get those stains out. Don’t be worried Anna.” “I’m more worried about what she will think of me as a person.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Why do you care what she thinks?” “I don’t know. I know I shouldn’t. Bad habit, I guess. When I didn’t fit in with the popular crowd in high school, I started caring too much about what other people think. I got teased for my weight, and I hated it. I’ve gotten away from it, but there are still areas in my life where I haven’t moved past that immature notion.” I glance at him to catch his reaction. He regards me with kindness. “It seems like that experience hurt you a lot.” My brows knot. “I’m telling you too much. It’s early.” I don’t want to go back to the memories of that era. He grabs his half empty mug of coffee and pulls up a chair. “Anna, I want to know you. Don’t be sorry. I just hate to see someone scorn their natural desires because of what other people think. Señora Madora is not someone you need to worry about. She was expecting you anyway, at least that’s what she told me.” “Do you believe in that?”

“Sometimes.” I catch a slight look of discomfort in his expression, and I wonder what Señora Madora said to him. Maybe she was trying to help push him back into the dating game. “I don’t believe in it. I think we make our lives what we want them to be. I don’t think fate controls us.” ***** Valentin Her light eyes regard me boldly. She’s so strong, so opinionated. Maybe Anna’s right, maybe it is all up to us. After all, Señora Madora told me that I’d meet the woman of my dreams, and she’d have my baby. That sounds like a dream I want to believe in, while at the same time knowing it’s impossible. “Did I offend you?” “No. Not at all. Señora Madora is right about some things. I have an open mind.” “She might just be a keen observer of human behavior and maybe that is how she makes her predictions.” “True.” I say no more. I don’t want to scare Anna away from me by my words or those of Señora Madora. Señora has been right about some things, though. She did predict Anna, down to her physical appearance and the year of our meeting. But then again, I suppose Señora Madora could have made a lucky guess or two. “What aren’t you telling me Valentin?” Now would be a good time for me to tell her the truth about the situation, but I’m not ready. I stand up, drain my mug, and stretch. “I think we should take care of your oil status.” “Yeah, right.” Her eyes hold a quizzical gleam, she wants to know what I’m hiding, but doesn’t press me further. “I better head for an area with cell service and call around.”

I reach into my jeans pocket and pull out my cell. “Lucky for me, mine works here. Want me to call for you, Anna? I could call the company I use, but then you’d owe me.” I lift my brows, wanting to get a rise out of her. “You already owe me for grea my jeans.” “I’m seeing you on the leather seat of my truck, naked.” I give her a salacious smirk and hit the number for the oil company. By the time she returns to the kitchen after changing into a clean pair of jeans, I’d finished making the calls. “Good news and bad news Anna. Bad news is that they cannot come until tomorrow, good news is that you can stay with me until then.” “They can’t come till tomorrow?” “You’re lucky to get that Anna. The storm has set them back on other oil deliveries.” “Crap. Well, maybe I can find another company to deliver.” “Already called for you. That’s the earliest you’re going to get.” “Thanks for calling for me.” “Let’s go to breakfast, and then we can plan what we’re going to do.” An hour later, we sit chatting in a cozy little diner, eating bacon and eggs and toast, and drinking coffee. Anna is on her third cup. “You really do like your coffee.” “I do, I got addicted to it in college, and I liked it so much I made it part of my business plan. You working later this morning?” “I have to go in this afternoon, but I was planning on spending the morning with you. I have a place I want to show you. There are some beautiful views of Lake Memphremagog nearby.” “Great, let’s do it.”

“We can drive near the shore on the way home. I know some back roads.” Hand in hand, we walk out of the diner to my truck. There’s a large pile of snow on the enger side, so she gets it on mine. She’s about to slide over, but I grab her waist and pull her close. “Don’t be afraid, I won’t bite.” Images of her fighting me on this seat on our first night flash through my brain. That was so hot, my shaft aches and stands at attention at the memory. She laughs, and I kiss her cheek. The sound of her laughter gives me a great feeling of warmth inside. It’s a sign that she enjoys my company, and I’m so grateful for this moment. It feels like I’ve been in a deep freeze for a long time and now I’m starting to thaw out. We drive off, wandering around the back roads near the Lake Memphremagog. It’s beautiful with the snowcapped mountains rising in the distance and the pines frosted in snow. I pull off after a while, parking on an overlook. We sit, radio on, engine running for the heat, and take in the view. “It’s so incredibly beautiful here.” “It is.” I can’t agree more, though, my gaze isn’t on the scenery, it’s on Anna. “Do you think you could live in a climate like the Anna? Or does it disagree with your hot southern blood?” It’s a bold question, but if we’re going to have a relationship, I need to know. Anna looks out across the Lake. “I don’t know Valentin. This place has amazing beauty, but the drawback is that my family, my business and my home is in the South.” She glances at me for understanding. “When I was a kid, I wanted the four seasons and snow.” She’s silent for a couple moments, and I wonder if she’s thinking that realistically we don’t have a chance. My heart constricts at her next words. “I want to go sled riding while I’m up here. Do you want to go sometime?” She’s deliberately changing the subject. A sigh escapes me. I didn’t realize that I had been holding my breath while she answered. Clearly, she isn’t ready to think about it. “Valentin?” Her question snaps me out of my dark thoughts.

“Yes. Absolutely. We could go at either one of our places, there is plenty of incline. Snowmobiling is another outdoor option for you. Ever been Anna?” “Never, but I think I’d like it.” “Come over to my house for dinner tonight. You can meet my brother, and we can take the snowmobiles out after dinner.” A concerned look flits across her face at the mention of meeting my brother, and my insides clench. Vladik must have said something to bother her. I won’t stand for him getting in the way of my new relationship, especially after the way Vladik interfered with me and Marina. “I’d love to try it.” “You’ll have to dress very warm. Do you have ski pants and long Johns?” “Ski pants yes. Long johns?” She gives me a quizzical look. “Thermal underwear.” “Oh. Nope. I don’t have that.” “I’ll see if Señora Madora can find you a pair. My nephews often leave things here, so there’s got to be something hiding in the closet. And Anna, I think you should stay over. The temperature is supposed to drop tonight, it could be very chilly in your cabin without heat, even though you have the fireplace,” I add, expecting her stubborn rebuttal. “Don’t forget to bring your things. You might want to stay a few days.” It’s noon when we pull into Anna’s driveway, and I give her a lingering kiss at the door before saying goodbye. She still hasn’t given me a definite answer on staying over. It frustrates me, but there is nothing I can do to rush her along. I need to be patient with her. Unfortunately, it has never been one of my virtues.

Chapter 15

Anna The cabin is quite chilly without a source of heat, and I’m in no mood to build a fire. There’s not much to do here, so I decide to pack my bag, and go shopping for a sled and a formal looking dress for Valentin’s party. After grabbing a quick bite to eat, I jump into my Jeep and head for Newport. I’m in luck. There is a fairly good selection of party dresses at the consignment shop on Main Street, and I pick two to try on. Both are made of a satin like material, one is red, the other black. In the end, I go with the red, and pick out a pair of black velvet spiky heels to match. The sled is harder to find, and I visit several stores before I can find one, a toboggan with red slats and a pull rope. It’s 4:00 PM by the time I get back, and I want a bath before I head up the mountain for dinner. My thoughts drift to sexy times with the Tsar, as I slip my fingers under the tap, waiting for the water to warm. After two minutes, and icy cold fingers, I have the sudden realization that the water is not going to get warm anytime soon. “Drat.” Obviously, I’ve got a sex fueled brain fog going on, I grab my razor and other toiletries, throw them in a bag and head out the door. Señora Madora greets me enthusiastically. “Anna, I’m so glad you have come back to us. Valentin told me to expect you.” She glances at my bags, exclaiming, “And you’re going to stay. Wonderful. I heard that you have no heat. It’s a good decision.” “Thank you for having me Señora Madora.” “Absolutely. Here Anna, let me help you.” She offers. “Oh, I’m OK, really. Where should I leave these?” “Valentin said to put you in his room. Is that acceptable? Vladik has the room down here, and when Antonin arrives with his family, they will be on the 2nd floor.” My cheeks flush. I know there are other empty rooms in the house.

“It’s alright Anna,” Señora Madora says, reading the expression on my face. “I’m good at keeping my lips sealed.” She makes the zipping motion with her fingers across her lips. “I think,” she lowers her voice conspiratorially, “Valentin is falling for you, big time.” She winks. Her words make me smile and put me at ease. We walk together down the hall and stop at a door. “We can put your bags here, Anna.” She opens the door, revealing a small freight elevator. I place my bags on it, she pushes a button, and the bags disappear in a fluid upward motion. “Want to take the elevator to your room or walk?” “Walking is fine.” “For me too, better for us.” She winks. Once at the room, she unlocks the door for me, hands me the key, opens the door to the lift and pulls out my bags. Noticing the clear plastic covering the red satin dress, she comments. “That looks very sexy, I’m sure Valentin will like it.” Señora Madora helps me put my things away and heads for the door. “Dinner will be at seven, Anna, please make yourself at home, and,” she lowers her voice, “I would keep your door locked. There isn’t a woman alive that Vladik can’t charm.” Yeah well, not this one, but I keep my thoughts on Vladik to myself. Honestly, I don’t know why I’d need to keep my door locked because of him, unless he’s a real creeper. “Thank you Señora Madora. I’m just going to get a shower, and then I’ll be down.” “Very well Anna.” She leaves the room, singing a cheerful song in Spanish, and I close the door, wondering about her advice to keep the door locked. Does Señora Madora think that Vladik can charm the pants off me like his older brother? I lock the room door, gather my razor, and rose scented body wash, and head for the tub. Shaving first, I rinse the stumble down the drain, and then fill the tub with warm water. Relaxing back into the tub, I close my eyes and enjoy the luxurious warmth of the water. My thoughts drift to the Tsar. How peculiar to be in the tub of a man I’ve just met, and who has got my brain sucked into a tornado of love chemicals. Odd how I’m able to feel simultaneously high as a

kite on the sex, and terrified of making some bad choices with someone I don’t really know all that well. It appears that the logic part of my brain has taken a hike. It’s more pleasant to be intoxicated on dopamine than worry, but I wonder what tonight will bring, what Valentin’s family is like, and about the question he asked me when we were in his truck together. My thoughts are interrupted by a knock on the door. Eyelids fluttering open, I grip the sides of the tub. “Hello?” “Anna, it’s Valentin. May I come in?” “It’s open.” He enters, looking fresh in from the cold with ruddy cheeks. His larger-than-life presence makes my heart hammer and my cheeks flush. ***** Valentin The sight of Anna, pink skin, sitting in a cloud of steam, makes my heart jump. She is a sight for sore eyes, this one. “I was just about to get out.” “No hurry, I enjoy coming home to a naked woman in my tub.” My cock stirs to life, as I lean over the tub to kiss her. After toweling off her pink skin, Anna retrieves her scented body butter. I take it from her hand, wanting to touch her everywhere, and make love to her slowly, but it’s nearly time for dinner, and Anna is already sensitive about our budding relationship exhibited in front of Señora Madora, so I’ll settle for the touching. “Allow me to do that for you.” Anna hops on to my bed and watches my capable hands retrieving some of the lotion and massaging her feet. “That feels so amazing. You’re so good with their hands.” She releases a sigh and leans back into the pillows.

Her skin feels delightfully soft to my fingertips, and I allow them to traverse the length of her legs and to the surfaces beneath the towel, as I knead the lotion into her skin. “Flip,” I say to her, giving her a playful swat on the butt as she flips over, leaving her towel undone. Goddess in Heaven. Wow. I start at the top of her thighs, working my way up the curve of her bottom. I linger there, massaging her cheeks, making her exhale with pleasure. I continue to her lower back, all the way up between her shoulder blades. When I finish, she turns over towards me, a dreamy peaceful look in her eyes. “I’m so relaxed now, I feel like I’ve melted. Thank you, Valentin. That was incredible.” A half smile comes to my face. “It’s the least I can do to prepare you for my family.” I’m unsure of the dynamic there will be when Vladik arrives, and yesterday I got a call from my older brother’s wife who lives in Russia. Dmitri is drinking again, heavily, and his wife, Tatiana, is worried. I have no idea how I’m going to handle that situation yet. Dimitri is a stubborn man, a lot like our father. Her eyes open a little wider. “At least you have siblings. You’re lucky.” “True. But siblings come with their own special challenges.” “Are you referring to Vladik?” “Yes.” A growl escapes my throat, I don’t want to tell her about Dimitri yet. It’s too much, it might scare her off from my family, even though Dimitri lives in Russia. Anna laughs. “It can’t be that bad, can it?” “The stories I could tell you. “I roll my eyes towards the ceiling. “Tell me one.” “Has to wait. Señora Madora has prepared dinner, but I’m dying to tell you.” My tone is teasingly sarcastic. Anna playfully punches me on the arm. “Liar. You’re keeping things hidden for

me. I want to know.” I reach for her and pull her body to me. The feel of her is like the touch of an Angel and warmth floods my body. She’s so right for me, but if she finds out all my secrets, she might not think I’m right for her. And that worries me.

Chapter 16

Anna Hand in hand, we walk down to dinner. Señora Madora greets us, “Good evening Anna, good evening Valentin!” “Good evening Señora Madora,” The Tsar replies, I echo the sentiment. It is 7:00 PM, and Señora Madora has set the dining table. Candles are lit on the table, reflecting off the red walls and the paintings, giving the room a warm mystical glow. She serves us red wine, and we sit talking and enjoying the ambiance. At 7:15 Señora Madora asks the Tsar if he wants to wait until Vladik arrives to serve dinner. “He won’t be coming Señora Madora. I apologize, I should have told you sooner, but it slipped my mind. My thoughts were occupied elsewhere.” He looks at me, as he speaks the last part, and causes a blush to ripple over my cheeks. Señora Madora smiles knowingly and heads back to the kitchen. “What happened to your brother?” “Knowing Vladik, it is because he met a woman. I don’t think he will be home tonight.” “Are we still going to be able to ride after dinner?” “Absolutely. Here let me show you the beast.” He pulls his phone out and retrieves a video. “Beast?” “That’s what I call her.” I take the phone from his hand and watch the sleds race. “Wow. They look fast. Cool. Is that you and your brother?” “That’s Vladik. Yep. Anthony took it for us. A nice family friendly race.” I laugh. “It looks pretty competitive to me.”

“All in fun. You excited to feel the roar of a powerful engine between your thighs?” He flashes me a teasing smile, laugh lines crinkling, just as Señora Madora enters the room carrying a tray of food. I shoot him a look. “I hope everything is to your satisfaction. Is everything OK Anna?” She caught the look. “Of course. It looks wonderful Señora Madora. Thank you.” “Superb job as usual Senora. I was just mentioning to Anna what a formidable machine the sled is.” Señora Madora waves a hand at him and shakes her head. “Boys and their toys.” Valentin winks at me, and I laugh. “I offered to give Señora Madora a ride.” He gives me a devious expression, making sure that Señora Madora sees it. “But she refused.” “I’ve seen you operate it. That was enough for me.” Valentin laughs at her response. “One of these days.” “When the underworld freezes over.” She leaves us to a feast. There are salad greens mixed with shredded carrots and black olives, corn, mashed potatoes and gravy, and meatloaf. The meatloaf has a kick to it, but it’s a delicious meal, and I savor every bite. After dinner is over, Señora Madora returns. “Dessert?” “No thank you. I’m stuffed. Your cooking is excellent Señora Madora.” “I am so pleased you like the meal Anna.” “Senora, do we have any long Johns in the house?” “Long Johns?” she asks, wrinkling her forehead, looking puzzled. “Long underwear, for under the clothing.” “Oh, I see. No, I don’t think so, but I can look up stairs. We don’t have anything

for a woman,” she says, eyeing my figure. “I thought maybe Antonine’s boys may have left something.” “I’ll check.” She bustles off, returning 5 minutes later with what looks like a set of boys’ thermal cotton underwear. “I think this may be a little short.” She holds it up to me. “Thank you Señora Madora. That will work.” “Come Anna, we better head out before it gets too late.” “Be careful,” Señora Madora warns. “I’ll leave dessert on the counter in case you change your minds.” Once upstairs, I try on the long underwear. The bottoms are too short and very snug, hitting me mid-calf. The shirt is also tight, making me look more buxom than usual. “I don’t know about this,” I say, glancing down at my borrowed undergarments. Valentin looks over at me, laughing. “You look like a very sexy elf.” “Gee, thanks,” I laugh with him. We bundle up, don helmets, and head for the snowmobiles. “Knowing you, I’m sure you’d like to control this animal yourself, but tonight, ride with me and get a feel for it.” A surge of excitement races through me as I mount the snowmobile behind Valentin and clutch his waist. It’s a gorgeous evening. The man in the moon climbs the vast deep blue sky above us, reflecting his light off snow frosted Pines. We roar off into the fields, my pulse racing with exhilaration and the buzz of danger. I’ve never experienced anything like this in the South. The wind rushes past wildly as we speed through the night over the frigid white fields. It’s too loud to hold a conversation, but it’s thrilling to hold on to his solid muscular body as we race around at breakneck speed. After an hour of exploring and winding back and forth across the fields, Valentin heads the machine back to the barn. My body is chilled, but the rush of excitement from racing along kept

me from noticing it. “What do you think?” He asks me with a wide smile. “I love that. That was such a rush!” “I thought you would. We’ll have to do that again soon. I didn’t want you to get cold though.” “I’m not bad at all.” He takes my hands in his, squeezes them and kisses my forehead. “Let’s go in and warm up.” He makes hot chocolate while I retrieve a can of whip cream from the fridge. “I do this for people at my coffee shop,” I say, as I swirl the cream into the cocoa. Valentin watches me, bemused. An impulse comes over me, and I turn to him suddenly and spray whip cream towards his face. I laugh at his startled reaction when it hits his neck. He jumps, and a dollop of whipped cream hits the floor. I take off at a sprint, and he lunges at me like a lion taking down its prey, succeeding in catching me and grabbing the can out of my hand. A shriek of laughter erupts from my throat. “Payback’s a bitch.” He says, holding the whip cream in one hand and grabbing onto me with his other arm. He pushes himself against me, bringing his lips to my ear. “Drink your cocoa woman, because I have a plan for you, and this can of whip cream after you finish.” I laugh. Being with him just feels right. It’s perfect. Perfect because I didn’t bring any expectations into this. We go back to sitting with our cocoa, warily watching each other, grins on our faces. “What’s so funny?” I hold the spoon to my lips and blow. “You are Anna,” he says, pushing a strand of hair off my face, “I like you. You’re so full of life, so full of enthusiasm.” “Thanks. I like you too.”

We kiss, tasting of chocolate, and he pulls me onto his lap. I stroke the sides of his face, feeling the stubble of his beard and looking deeply into his eyes. It blows me away that I’m having this incredibly exciting time with a man I just met. It’s so unexpected, and completely wonderful. I haven’t felt this carefree in a long time. “I never expected this trip to turn out like this, I thought I was going to be by myself most of the time, holed up in my cabin,” I say, placing a hand gently on either side of his face. “I have just the thing for filling that hole in your cabin. Come upstairs, and I’ll show you.” He gives me a lusty smile. “Are you the big bad Wolf?” I’m laughing, as he carries me towards the stairs, until that is, we hear a key turning in the hallway lock. A very tall, blonde haired man steps through the door. The Tsar stops in his tracks and sets me on my feet. “Vladik.” “Valentin, up to a bit of fun looks like.” They shake hands and give each other a manly hug. “Anna, this is Vladik, Vladik, this is Anna.” I shake his hand, feeling slightly uncomfortable. “Anna and I have already met,” he says, taking my hand and kissing the back of it. I shiver involuntarily, hoping it won’t be noticeable. The Tsar notices, “Anna, why don’t you go and warm up in the shower. I need to speak with my brother.” “Sure.” I leave them, climbing the stairs and listening at the top, trying to discern what the conversation is about. I can’t get any closer without exposing myself, but I hear my name and Marina’s, and it sounds heated. I wait for more, but it never comes, the sound of the sitting room door closing indicates that they’ve taken the

conversation there. Disappointed, I enter the Tsar’s room, leaving a trail of clothes as I head for the shower. I wait for it to heat up, and step in. The water sprays over my skin, and I turn back and forth, warming up in its wet heat. Finally, I turn off the tap, speculating about what the Tsar and Vladik are discussing and what this night will bring. The light comes on automatically, as I enter the closet, and I hunt around for the duffel bag that Señora Madora tucked away for me. Lost in thought, I don’t hear the Tsar enter the room. Without warning, strong arms trap me from behind, and enclose me in a tight embrace, and I can’t stop the loud yell of surprise that escapes my lips. His deep voice speaks low in my ear, “You have made a very dangerous mistake, my little Tsarina, wandering into my lair, leading me to you with a trail of your clothes.” I struggle against the Tsar’s grasp, his muscular arms binding me to him. He lifts me, his long, thick cock swinging behind me, bumping against my thighs, moving closer to my pussy as he maneuvers us to the bed. He sucks at my neck, biting into me. It stings, and I cry out, fighting him in our love play. This is a new side to him, a rougher, more aggressive side, and I want this, want him. I’m his slut and for the moment, I don’t care. It’s excitement like I’ve never felt before. He holds my wrists together with one hand and sprays the length of my spine with the whip cream all the way down to my ass crack with the other. Squishy cream fills my backside, and he uses his tongue to lick the length of it. He finishes lapping the cream by rimming my asshole with his tongue. A loud cry escapes my lips, as he pushes his erect cock between my folds. His shaft is thick and long, and he inserts himself deeply. He reaches for a pillow to push between my thighs, using his fingers to stroke my swollen clit. His pelvis rubs against my backside, making loud slapping sounds that echo off the walls, the four posters of the bed moving to the rhythmic motions of his piston like thrusts. The headboard begins to bang on the wall as his thrusting motions increase, sending waves of pleasure into my body. It feels primal, erotic, his weight bearing down on me from behind, his groin making quick slapping sounds against my ass cheeks. Sexy moans roll off my

lips, as I throb with pleasure, the feeling spreading like a wave from between my legs. He cups my breasts hard, squeezing and stroking and grunting. “Ow, ow, ow.” I pant. “You need a good hard fuck my little Tsarina,” His voice is low, almost angry sounding with intensity. I find a spot on the pillow and rock my hips with his, causing me to throb and ache with desire. Feeling like I’m about to explode, I rock harder with him. He’s deep inside me, swollen to the point of bursting. I try to roll over, but the Tsar catches my arms, keeping me trapped beneath him. Ferociously, I struggle against him, my motions allowing us to up the intensity of this unspoken sex play. Climax threatens to explode between my legs, heat radiating between our bodies, as he strokes me from behind. “You need this Anna,” he says seductively in my ear, as he steadily fucks me from behind. He begins to stroke me harder from the rear, our sweat making him slide and slap against my bottom. “This is going to feel so good Anna. I’m going to cum now.” The Tsar comes forcefully, his ejaculate pulsing deep inside me, forcing me to my own pleasure. The pressure is too much for me to take and I cum at the tail end of his climax. Waves of ecstasy spread between my legs, reverberating through my body, sending me to another dimension. When I come down, I become aware of the tightness of the muscles in my buttocks, and the Tsar’s weight bearing down on my back. Breathing hard, he lies on top of me, his cock still between my legs. “I made you feel it, didn’t I Anna? You like danger, thrill.” He does excite me. And he’s right, I like being surprised by him, like his forcefulness, and I feel as though I have finally met my match in this man.

Maybe more than a match, he challenges me in a way I’ve never been challenged, and I can’t get enough. It’s like I’ve been starving for a fiery kind of ionate lust and love I didn’t know existed until this moment. I don’t want to be the good girl anymore or live safe. But there’s a problem, how am I going to deal with the end of this vacation? It’s not something I want to think about too deeply. At least not right this second. My inner cynic chirps its opinion. Yeah Anna, stay in denial. That’ll get you everywhere.

Chapter 17

Anna The next morning is overcast, and fresh snow begins to fall. Breakfast is a strange affair with Vladik being here, he seems moody. And the Tsar seems to have an undercurrent of anger about him. It’s probably due to his brother, and I wonder if that was why he was so forceful in bed last night. Señora Madora is as cheerful as ever, humming a little Spanish tune to herself as she bustles about the kitchen. “Anna, more coffee?” “Thank you Señora Madora,” I say, as she pours me another steaming cupful. “When is Antonin arriving today?” “He won’t be coming Anna,” the Tsar answers, “I checked the weather before you got up, we may be getting another 18 inches. I’m going to have to postpone the party until next week.” “Oh, that’s a shame.” “Not unusual, though.” He stands and kisses my cheek. “Anna, I need to take care of some things this morning. Your oil delivery should be around ten. Do you want me to meet you at your place?” “I’m fine.” “You sure?” “I can handle it Valentin.” There’s an edge in my voice, I suppose I’m still annoyed at myself for not thinking to check on my oil. He looks like he wants to say more, but he pauses and lets it slide. “I’ll catch up with you later Anna. Vladik, are you ready?” Vladik stands, and I watch them as they walk towards the hall. Both are broad shouldered, though the Tsar has at least an inch or two of height over his younger brother. Odd, how two brothers have such different coloring. While sipping my coffee, I make small talk with Señora Madora until I drain my

cup. Setting it in the sink, I thank Senora and head for the stairs, nearly running straight into Vladik, who is heading for the door. “Anna.” “Vladik, excuse me,” I say, trying to get past him. He catches my arm, “In a hurry again, Anna?” I wrench my arm from his grasp and try to move up the stairs. He lets me go but remains in front of me. My pulse rockets, as his eyes linger over my figure. “Anna, you should be careful in this house. My brother is charming, but he’s not always completely truthful.” “What are you talking about?” I snap. “Ask him why he denied his wife what she wanted.” “It’s none of my business. Whatever happened between them is finished.” “My brother is still the same man he used to be when he was married to Marina. Selfish, always thinking of his own interests. How old are you anyway? My brother looks like he is old enough to be your father.” “You’re rude.” An intense flush floods my entire body. I knew he was trouble as soon as I met him. “Struck a nerve, didn’t I? You’re making a big mistake Anna, being with a much older man. You could have someone younger.” He moves closer to me, lowering his voice, “If you need a better lover, I’m available. No strings attached.” His vivid blue eyes caress my body. My mouth opens in shock, and I take a step backwards, “That will never happen.” “If you change your mind, I’m right down the hall.” “Because you are Valentin’s brother, I’m going to pretend that this conversation never happened.”

“You secretly desire me.” His arrogance is unbelievable, “That couldn’t be farther from the truth. You’re so full of yourself.” “Don’t be afraid, Anna. I know how to make a woman happy, unlike my brother.” I hold my shaky hands up to ward off his words. “Enough.” “ what I said Anna. Down the hall,” he winks at me. I move to step around him and trip backwards on the stairs. Vladik catches me and holds me to him. Unnecessarily. “Take your hands off her.” The Tsar’s deep voice resonates down the stairway. “Relax.” She tripped. “I saved her from falling.” I catch my breath and glance from brother to brother. Obviously, there’s an underlying issue between them. Why I don’t know. I wrap my arms about myself in a gesture of self-comfort as Valentin descends the stairs. It makes me realize how much I don’t know about him or his family. Something is between them. There’s a feeling of it hanging in the air. And it’s massively uncomfortable. The two brothers face off, and for a moment, I’m unsure of what is about to unfold. Vladik keeps his gaze directly on his elder brother but makes no move to stand down. My sweaty palm finds a hand hold on the stair railing, and I watch as Valentin comes face to face with his brother. “You will keep your distance.” He addresses Vladik. “He’s marked you as his possession.” Vladik throws the comment towards me. My voice finally finds itself. “I’m not anyone’s property.” A deep red flush travels across my skin, and I grip the railing tighter for . “Jesus. Everyone’s triggered.” Vladik shakes his head, staying square with Valentin.

I interrupt their standoff. “It’s been fun guys. Really. But I’m taking off. I’m gonna get my stuff.” “Anna.” Valentin calls to me. Taking two steps up the stairs at a time, I quickly reach the third floor, nearly crashing into one of the palms. Throwing my clothing and toiletries into my duffel bag, I speedily pack, feeling my hands shake with adrenaline. Señora Madora had warned me. Maybe it’s their Russian blood. Maybe that was a racist thought. Maybe they’re just hot-blooded males. He follows me, and watches me pack, his frame filling the doorway. When I approach him, he won’t stand aside. By now I’m used to this behavior. “Let me by.” “I’m sorry I offended you.” “You didn’t. I’m not used to this male aggression thing though. It’s not necessary.” “With Vladik it is.” “Care to explain that?” Valentin runs a hand through his hair and exhales. “It’s complicated with him.” “Yeah. I can tell.” The look on his face speaks volumes. Whatever happened between them, I’m pretty sure it had to do with the Tsar’s wife, Marina. And by the limited span of time I’ve had with Vladik, it’s no surprise. He likes women, and he exudes self-confidence, probably in part to his roguish good looks. “I’m sorry Anna.” “Don’t worry about it. You need to head for work. We can talk later.” He doesn’t argue with me, and by that, I know that it’s a conversation that’s going to take some time to work through. We part on a troubled note. Outside, big chunky flakes shoot from the sky, leaving a frosted coating on my jeep. After clearing it off, I get in and turn on the radio. The music puts me in a

different frame of mind, clearing my worries. When I pull into my driveway, I feel better, but decide that after the oil arrives, I’m going to take a drive and listen to the radio. The oil delivery guy is late by an hour and in an obvious hurry. “How much do I owe you?” I ask, pulling out my checkbook. “No charge, it was taken care of,” he says, as he heads for his truck. “What?” I ask, confused. “Tsarev took care of it, settle with him.” He calls over his shoulder, as he climbs into his truck and roars off. I head back inside and rub my hands together. It’s super chilly from the heat being off for so long. I listen for the sound of the furnace. Nothing. “That’s weird.” Flicking on the light, I walk down into the musty smelling cellar. Obviously, something isn’t working right, but I haven’t a clue what to do about it. There’s no access to Wi-Fi to check YouTube. I circle the tank twice, find no cause to the problem, and release an exasperated sigh. I head back up the stairs and out the door. It’s too cold to stay, and I’m not in the mood to build a fire. Not having a phone when there are things needing fixing in this place is turning out to be a nuisance. There’s nothing left to do but head for civilization to get cell service and call around for help. I drive to Newport, find a diner, and go inside to get a bite to eat. While waiting for my food to arrive, I call the oil company that serviced my tank. The line is busy, so I leave a message. After completing that task, I look out the window into the falling snow. The sky is getting darker, and the snow falls heavily now. Beautiful and gloomy at the same time. I debate whether or not to call Rachel, but decide against it, since she’s at work. The things Vladik said earlier bother me. In truth, I don’t know Valentin that well. Was Vladik telling the truth about Marina, and if so, what was he talking about? Or was Vladik simply trying to make a move on me? An old woman with faded blue eyes and white hair approaches me, face beaming. “I just wanted to tell you, young lady, that you remind me of my granddaughter.”

I smile at her. “Really?” “Yes, you do. She lives so far away. I miss her terribly. I don’t mean to bother you.” “It’s no bother. I know what it’s like to miss someone a lot. I miss my Nana. She ed away last year.” The lady looks at me with sad eyes. “I’m sorry to hear that dear.” She pats my hand. “I’m sure she is looking down from heaven on you.” “Maybe she is.” “Of course, she is my dear.” I nod. “Have a good day, ma’am. I hope you get to see your granddaughter soon.” “You too, dear. And don’t worry about things too much. Love has a way of working things out. Why, when I was a young girl…” Amid her reverie, she is interrupted by a man who looks like he might be her husband. “Helen, there you are. I wondered where you got off to.” A tall, white haired gentleman approaches her, looking from me to Helen. “I’m sorry,” he says, addressing me, “she is forgetful at times.” He takes Helen by the arm and begins to gently lead her away. “Oh, don’t be sorry, we were having a nice conversation. Nice to meet you Helen,” I call after her. “Nice to meet you, Anna dear.” The couple walk off arm in arm, leaving me puzzling over whether I told Helen my name. I can’t doing so. Strange. But interesting. After leaving a generous tip for the waitress, I leave and walk a half a block down the street to the drugstore. Wandering the aisles, I find what I need, journals. I pick out a red leather-bound journal and scan the aisle for pens. Ten minutes later I check out, carrying my bag of pens, a journal, and a giant bag of Skittles. When I return to the cabin, hoping the heat somehow miraculously works, I am sorely disappointed to find that it’s colder than ever. There’s nothing left to do

but build a roaring fire, which I accomplish before settling down on my fake fur rug, with my back to the fire and my newly purchased journal. It feels good to write out my emotions. They emerge like a flood, releasing my hopes and fears. February 5, Dear Diary, Amazing how your life can change in such a short time. I came up here to Nana’s cabin, thinking it would be quiet and peaceful. I thought I would have time to think about my life, decide where I wanted to be in the future, but I haven’t had much time. I had to clean the place, settle in, and then a blizzard blew in. I thought I would read too, but I haven’t been able to concentrate lately. The day after I got here, a storm threatened and the Bennett’s wanted me to stay with them in town till it ed. I didn’t want to, I don’t mind being by myself, but because I said no to them, they ended up sending a friend of theirs to come check on me. I thought for sure he was going to be the grizzly Adams type, an old guy with a thick white beard. Man, was I wrong on that. This guy they sent over is nothing short of complete hawtness. I was very surprised when I opened my door. Dark hair, very tall, muscular build, and commanding. He tricked me into going to his mansion. He told me he would drive me home after I ate dinner at his house, so I agreed. After dinner, he refused to take me home! I was pissed. He is a very forceful type, and I don’t like being told what to do. I’m not sure what came over me, but I tried to take his truck. I guess because he lied to me and was so sure of himself that he knew better. He was furious at me for that and came after me. If the wind hadn’t blown the door out of my hands, I think I would have gotten away. I managed to get in the truck, but he grabbed onto me and I couldn’t escape. He’s very strong, and he ended up carrying me up to his room so I couldn’t leave! I tried to leave again, and he threw me on his bed and got on top of me. I had a feeling something was going to happen when he did that. I can’t explain it. Maybe because I never did it before. I don’t know. But I was mad, and I wanted him at the same time. I’ve never met anyone like him before. I wish I had Rachel here to talk to, but at the same time it would be embarrassing.

I feel so naïve. I’m just wondering what to do with this relationship. I hardly know him, but I keep doing it with him like I can’t stop. I tell myself to stop, that this can’t work out because we live so far apart, but then when I’m with him, I lose my resolve. And I wonder if his rude brother is right about him. What if this is just a fling to him? Valentin told me he was falling for me, but he lied to me about bringing me home, so what if he’s telling me that so I’ll keep sleeping with him? I don’t know. It felt like he meant it when he said it, but how can I tell for sure? I told him I loved him, but is it more lust than love? Yeah, probably. We live so far away from each other; I don’t even know how we could possibly make this work. I run my fingers through my hair and look out the window. Heavy snowfall gives the landscape a beautiful grey color. “Nana would probably just enjoy this for the moment. Mom would probably want me to act like a nice southern girl and keep two feet on the floor and my panties on.” I laugh to herself, “Oh god, how do I handle this?” Needing a distraction from my heady thoughts, I head for the bedroom and lift the trunk lid open. Grabbing the first journal I find, I open to a random page, dated July 1, 1956. Nana would have been just 17. I scan the entry. Just met the most exciting man of my life. A pilot for the Inland Baptist Mission in Africa. James T. Maxwell. He is a most determined man, and he has been to so many places already. Mother doesn’t want to hear of it, but I want to go back there. If only my parents would allow it. I can’t wait until I am 18! They want me to go to college first, but I am determined to travel, to see the world. And I want to see James again. The lushness of Africa is beyond belief. I will write more later. I speak at church tonight, and I need to get my speech ready… “Nana, at least you did your traveling, even if you didn’t get the guy.” A loud, familiar knock on my kitchen door abruptly jars me back to the present. I head for the door and look out. It’s the Tsar.

Chapter 18

Anna “Anna,” he says, moving towards me. “Valentin.” The fight on the inside of me is still going on. Is Valentin being completely truthful with me? What about Vladik’s words to me? An uneasy, strange feeling arises inside me. I’m unhappy about it, but what choice is there? I must be real with where our lives are going. I live in the south. It’s obvious that I’m not yet cut out to live up here, and I don’t know Valentin that well, except that he is over and above, a helpful neighbor and then some. His hands catch my arms. “What’s wrong?” His face shows concern. “The oil tank was filled by your guy, but the furnace won’t turn on. I’ve tried everything. I looked at it and hit the reset button a couple of times, but it didn’t do anything. I went to Newport and called the oil company that filled the tank, but they didn’t get back to me, and I couldn’t get ahold of anyone else to come out and look at it.” “Anna,” he gives me a chastising look, and my belly does a flip flop. He has this way of looking at me like he’s going to do something deviant to me and making me feel like I’m a complete airhead. “Why didn’t you call me?” “You’re a busy man, you run a company. Besides, I live by myself, and I have to deal with things on my own anyway.” “Your father doesn’t help you?” “That’s a sexist thing to say. It could be my mother that helps me with stuff like this you know.” “Ok.” He holds his hands up, as if to surrender. “I am well aware that you women are very capable of anything you set your minds to.” “That’s right. We are.” I point to the toolbox on the floor that I retrieved from the shed. I’m not going to tell him how much of a struggle it was for me to lift it either. A dismayed look crosses my face. The bottom line right now is that I need to ask for his help.

He looks down at me and crosses his arms. “Ok. So, you’re going to go fix it by yourself.” I nod, realizing how ridiculous I feel in this moment. My cheeks burn hot and I stare at the floor, mixed emotions roiling beneath my silent facade. I don’t want to need him or want him, especially because this is going to come to an end anyway. But, the cabin is freakin’ cold. I swallow my pride. “Could you please help me Valentin?” He rubs his chin thoughtfully. “Did you just ask for my help Anna?” “You heard me.” “I see. And if I help you, I suppose you’ll owe me something, according to your rules.” My light eyes flick back to his dark diabolic ones. “Yeah, I caught your attention. I have rules too. I want something from you after I finish schooling you in how to restart your furnace.” I toss him a defiant look, even though my body is already beginning to respond to his words. “What do you want?” “Patience. I’ll show you when we finish. But it’s going to start with this.” He reaches for me, causing an electric thrill to race through my body. His lips trace a fiery path across my own. With his hands, he cups the underside of my ass cheeks, and lifts and squeezes, till he has me off the floor, his pelvis jammed into mine. My arms automatically reach around his neck, as he presses me against the wall and leans into me with his hips. My pussy lips swell as they encounter his bulging sac, despite the layers of denim between us. “Think you can handle my offer?” “I’m pretty sure I can.” He releases me abruptly, and though I feel the loss of him acutely, I give no sign of it. “We better get started.” “What do you think is wrong?”

“There’s probably air in the line, maybe sludge from the bottom of the tank. It must be bled out before it is restarted. We need to get on it if you want to have heat.” We head down into the dank basement. Lit by a few bare bulbs, it’s the one thing about the cabin I don’t care for. “You’re going to get greasy.” Valentin grins at me, taking a piece of nylon tubing and a wrench out of his coat pocket. “What’s that for?” “I’m going to show you. Do you have a bucket, or an empty coffee can?” “I’ll be right back.” I run up the steps, empty the contents of my coffee can into a Ziploc bag and return. In short order, he shows me how to bleed the valve, attach a piece of nylon tubing and release the air bubbles. Oil suddenly shoots into the can. He lets it drain for several seconds and then tightens the bleeder valve. “Hopefully, this does the trick. Ready Anna? You can hit the reset button now.” Hitting the valve, I wait, listening for the hum of the furnace. Thankfully, it turns on. “Thank you, Valentin. That actually wasn’t too bad.” “You’re lucky, sometimes an empty tank can cause a clog from the sludge on the bottom. Just don’t let it run dry again.” He warns. “Well, now I know. And I owe you for the oil too. The guy said you took care of it.” He waves me off, “Don’t worry about it.” “I’m not worried. How much do I owe you?” “Nothing.” “Valentin. You must tell me.” He strides ahead of me, taking the heavy toolbox with him. He really infuriates me sometimes.

“It’s on me.” “This isn’t a date. I pay for my own stuff.” “Come with me and sit in my truck, and you can argue with me there where it’s warmer.”

Chapter 19

Valentin Anna follows me out to my truck. She needs me but doesn’t want to it it to herself. Her irritated rant with me about paying the oil bill only serves to turn me on. I want a good hard fuck with her. I want to make her see that we fit together so well, that she gives me a chance. My finger hits the remote start on my truck. “Valentin. Will you stop being so damned stubborn? You have to let me pay you back. Seriously, stop ignoring me, like you’re a cave man or something.” I turn on her. “You’re afraid.” She stops in her tracks. “What?” “You finally have a man that wants you, like no man ever has, and you’re afraid of what that might mean for you. You’re afraid that your sweet southern life is going to be upended.” “We have known each other for a very short time, it’s not like we can even think about something like that already.” “But you have, haven’t you?” That shuts her up for a moment. “And obviously so have you.” “Exactly. And I still say you’re afraid. It’s not every day that two people feel a chemistry like this. It’d be a shame to waste it.” She opens her mouth and then closes it. Yep. Nail on the head. Sparks come out of her eyes, just like the night she’d come to dinner and wouldn’t listen to me. “You can’t honestly think that I would move up here just to be near a primitive savage like you.” “Primitive savage?” “That’s what I said.”

I lunge towards her, grab her around the waist, lift her into my arms, and hoist her into my truck. She yelps with surprise. Once her butt is planted on the leather seat, I stand between her thighs and close my mouth over hers. “You’re so damned stubborn.” I nip her neck lightly with my teeth and suck. She pulls at my t-shirt, and tweaks my nipple with her teeth. “And you think you’re not?” She looks up at me, her light eyes containing all the challenge in the world. She’s sexy as hell, but her spirit is a spitfire, and I love it. I love this thing we have together. I get in the truck with her and waste no time in getting down to the business of lovemaking. My fingers adroitly unzip her jacket and move it off her shoulders. My cock uncomfortably hard as I look in awe at her breasts, the voluminous globes pushing up against the thin fabric of her white t-shirt and cotton bra. I stroke them and release a groan. Her nipples stand at attention, taut from the cold. I lift her t-shirt and pull the thin cotton bra downwards, exposing her breasts. It’s exquisite pleasure to feel her back arch beneath my hands, my mouth moving to cover first one nipple and then the other, making quick flicking motions over them with my tongue. Our breath mingles and rises in wisps around our faces, steaming up the windows of my truck. My fingers move to the space between her thighs, caressing her most sensitive parts, continuing as she cries out in pleasure. We lips, her fingers reaching down to touch the distended bulge behind my jeans. With deft finger movements, I stroke her pussy lips through the tightness of her jeans, until she’s nearly ready to cum. In a mad rush to connect our bodies, I push her jeans and thong to mid-thigh, while she releases my cock from the tight confines of my pants. I lift her to my lap, and she faces me, knees bent. Anna lowers herself onto me, her fingers encircling the swollen flesh of my cock, pushing her breasts into my face. I exhale with pleasure as my stiff cock slides into her swollen pink slit. My hands cup her bottom and her in vigorous thrusts over me, her pussy devouring my cock, jeans straining against her muscles. Every forward movement sends a burst of pleasure to the nerve endings in my cock.

Anna rides me, our exclamations of ecstasy commingling with the sound of flesh spanking flesh and the creak of the leather seat. The snow falls harder around us, cocooning the outside of our world in the silent swish of snow and wind. From a distance, if anyone had been watching, they would have seen the truck rock ever so slightly with the force of our movements. I inhale the fragrant scent of her body wash, noticing her lovely face, intense and maybe a little angry. Maybe she’s ing the night when she tried to escape me. Or maybe she’s mad at herself for wanting me, knowing that if she keeps fucking me, her life is going to be turned upside down. And that’s exactly how I want it. My hands grip her bottom with both hands as she rides me, my tongue gliding over her nipples. The muscles in her buttocks strain, her grip tightening on my shoulders as she crests the pleasure wave. I push her backwards slightly, this sex vixen is going to make me explode, and I want it to last. “Slow down a little, I can’t last at this pace.” Anna slows her pace for me, but the slick glide of flesh against flesh intoxicates me. “How’s this?” Anna does a slow tease with her hips. “You sex goddess. Anna I can’t last much longer.” “Neither can I.” She strokes me slowly until we’re both at the peak of climax. And then, slamming her hips into mine, she rocks into me hard, like she’s riding a horse at full gallop. “I’m cumming!” She throws her head backwards, arching her back, as I pull her ass cheeks into me. “I’m cumming too.” I groan, releasing my load, spurting my seed deep inside her. Her heart pounds beneath her skin, as she collapses onto me. “Oh my god, that was so fucking incredible.” My brows lift in a teasing manner, and Anna claps her hand over her mouth.

Laughter escapes me, her reaction is hilarious. This southern belle is letting her guard down with me, getting loose, and I love every second of it. “I can’t believe I just said that.” Anna laughs at herself, her cheeks pink from the blush of exertion. “You’re not offending me.” “I know.” Anna hesitates. “I’ve never felt so free with anyone. I knew sex would be good, but I didn’t know it would be this good. I’ve been so controlled all my life, I never realized I was holding myself back.” There’s a pang of something inside me at her words. I try to ward off my conscience, the part of me that keeps saying I’d better tell her the truth about myself, but it won’t stop. We just had the most perfect sex in the world, and I don’t want my pessimism ruining the moment, that little voice that reminds me that when things get really good, it means that everything is about to come crashing down. I place the fleshy part of my thumb on her bottom lip and rest my head on her heaving breasts. My cock is heading back to its resting state, and the logical part of my brain is telling me that when her vacation is over, she’ll be out of my life for good. I don’t want this to end. The smell of leather and sex, body wash and sweat permeates my truck, and I want to hold onto this moment with all my senses and never let it go. Anna gently caresses my head with her fingertips, remaining with me until I lift my head. When our eyes meet, I know I need to tell her the truth. “Are you alright?” Despite the fire she exhibited earlier, her expression is gentle. “I have things I need to tell you.” “Ok.” Concern fleetingly flashes across her face. “You going to tell me your deepest darkest secrets? You know, like have you ever killed anyone? Things of that nature.” Her attempt at humor falls flat. Our eyes meet and lock, neither of us laughing. I’ve worried her, and I’m worried myself. All the needs and wants I had with my departed wife flood in on me. My inability to give her a baby. Her cancer,

which I view as mostly my fault, and the fact that I got to live, while she didn’t. Slowly, she lifts herself off me, massaging the back of her thighs. Drawing attention to our physical needs and away from the emotional side. I made her uncomfortable. Normally, I’m bold, but this. Yeah, this is making me feel weak. “Want to come in?” She asks, pulling up her jeans. “Yes, I need to rinse off.” “You didn’t tell me your blackest secret yet.” She senses that I’m holding back. “I’m going to kill my brother.” Mouth dropping open in mock surprise, Anna whacks me in the chest, “What!” A teasing smile spreads across my face. “I’ll kill him if he comes between you and me.” “Why would you think something like that?” “I know my brother, Anna. Vladik has many sides to him as we all do. Just don’t trust him.” “Why do you let him stay with you if you don’t trust him?” “He is still family Anna. He is my younger brother.” “I can’t see him coming between us. I wish we lived closer, but I don’t want to think about that right now.” “How long are you here for Anna?” “Two more weeks.” “I thought you were staying 6 weeks? You said your business partner was off for 6 weeks.” “I took off 3. I’ll take more time off in the summer probably.” “We have very little time.”

“I don’t want to think about it,” she shakes her head, running fingers through her hair. “I’m trying to live in the moment. And,” she says, leaning towards me to nibble at my ear, “I’m having the best time of my life.” “As am I. Can you request an extension of your stay here?” “I already gave my word.” “I see.” Nodding, I look into her eyes, my heart heavy in my chest. Changing the subject from what is certainly depressing, she asks me if I’m ready to go in. We leave the truck, walking through the swirling snow to the cabin. The mood has changed though, it’s dark, like the clouds swirling overhead. My truth is looming over us, and the thought of her leaving for North Carolina is a lot more than I want to think about at the moment.

Chapter 20

Anna “Will you come with me to my home tonight Anna?” “I need to take care of things here, some of my Nana’s things.” I nod at him, hoping for understanding and yet not wanting to be apart from him. He takes my hands in his, strong large hands surrounding smaller feminine ones. “I want you to stay with me Anna, while you’re here. Think about it. Please.” He kisses my lips and gently embraces me, and then he’s gone. His truck sending clouds of powdery snow behind it. Hands on the windowsill, I watch until it’s out of sight, and then sink into the wooden chair at the table. Tears threaten to spill out of my eyes. How am I going to be able to leave him in 3 weeks if I can hardly stand one night apart from him? I think to myself, wondering if there is a solution or if the relationship is doomed by distance. Thinking back to the night in the library, I recall his words. I don’t want to scare you Anna. You are an independent woman. But I’m falling in love with you. Just words. What if he said things like that to get a woman in bed with him? He had lied about dinner on that first night. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer. He had planned all along that I would stay with him, not originally in the same room of course, but still… That wasn’t love at that point, it was lust. Good lust though, very good lust! My thoughts roil around in my brain till I decide to do something, anything. Pulling on my jacket, I head for my jeep, listening to the sound of the engine roaring to life, thinking of sex in his truck. God that was hot. Pushing it out of my mind, I head into the storm down the mountain, wondering where to go. Aimlessly I drive, listening to music. The radio’s full of static from the storm, and I can’t get good reception, so I shut it off. Entering the Main Street of Jardin, I recall the Bennett’s invitation and decide to pull over and give them a call.

Emma answers on the first ring, “Hello?” “Mrs. Bennett, its Anna Anderson. How are you?” “Anna! It’s wonderful to hear from you. Call me Emma dear. Where are you?” “I’m actually in town right now, and I was wondering if I might stop by for a short visit.” “That would be our pleasure Anna.” “Are you sure I’m not inconveniencing you?” “Not at all, Harold and I would love to meet you.” “Great, I’d love to meet you too. Can I get directions to your place?” “Certainly, Anna.” Three minutes later, I pull into the driveway of the Bennett’s. Emma comes out to greet me, smiling broadly. “Anna,” she says, reaching out to embrace me. “My goodness, we finally get to meet you. You’re every bit as lovely as your grandmother described you.” “Thank you. That’s so nice of you to say.” The mention of my grandmother makes me feel a twinge of sadness. I bend down to hug her, noticing how small and frail she seems. Emma’s hair is a silvery white and she has the most crinkly, lively turquoise eyes I’ve ever seen. “Come on in dear.” She leads me up the steps of her older style white colonial with black shutters. “Harold is napping, but he’ll be glad to meet you.” “Oh, don’t wake him on my .” “He needs to get up,” she says in a conspiratorial whisper. Harold is sound asleep, snoring with his head tilted back, mouth open, as I walk into the living room. The TV’s on full blast, and I wonder how they can stand the sound. A cane is propped up against the recliner between his feet.

“Harold!” Emma calls him loudly. Still sleeping, he snorts, waving a hand in front of his face like he’s swatting a fly. Walking over to him, Emma picks up his cane and gives him several pokes to the ribs. “Harold, we have a visitor!” This time she succeeds in waking him, and he looks from me to Emma in dazed wonderment. “Harold, dear, this is Anna, Margaret Collins’ granddaughter.” He takes the cane from Emma and shakily stands, extending his hand to me. “Glad to meet you Anna.” “Nice to meet you, Sir.” “Anna would you like a cup of tea or coffee?” “Coffee would be great if you have it.” I follow Emma into the kitchen. “How were the roads coming down the mountain?” “Okay. I probably shouldn’t stay too long though, just to make sure I can get back up.” “And how was your stay with the Tsar?” I flush thinking of my first night there. “It was fine. He and Señora Madora are very neighborly.” “I thought you’d like him. He’s not bad to look at either.” She gives me a knowing look. “He certainly attracts the attention of the ladies around here, but after his poor wife died, I don’t think he was interested in anyone else. Which is understandable.” “Yes, I heard about his wife. That is incredibly sad.” Emma pours me a cup of coffee. “Cream and sugar?” “Please.”

“Harold. Come out, your coffee is ready.” Harold appears with his cane, as I’m adding cream and sugar to my coffee. Emma produces a block of Vermont cheddar and a plate of freshly baked buns. “These smell heavenly Emma,” I say, sniffing the buns. Taking one, I pare it with a slice of cheese and take a bite. “These are delicious.” I smile at Emma. “Thank you, I’m glad I made them. I would have made dinner for you if I had known you were coming over.” “Oh, this is fine. Sorry for the short notice, I’ve just been held up since the storm, and then I ran out of oil.” Harold looks over at me. “Oil? Did you say oil?” “Yes sir, I ran out.” I make sure to enunciate my words loudly, since he seems to have trouble hearing. “Harold, turn up your hearing aid,” Emma shouts at him. “That’s not a good thing,” he looks at me from beneath his bushy eyebrows. “Did you get more oil yet?” “I did.” “Did it restart for you? Older furnaces usually need to be primed.” “The… I mean, Valentin, helped me with it.” I almost call him the Tsar, because in my mind the name fits his overbearing authoritative nature. Thankfully, I catch myself. Emma looks at me with a speculative gleam in her eye. “The Tsar is a very nice man.” Flushing, I drop my eyes and sip at my coffee, “He is.” “What do you think of the North, Anna?” “I love it up here. I can see why my grandmother had a cabin here. It’s beautiful, and I love the snow. How did the two of you meet my grandmother?”

“Harold was her realtor when she came looking for a place. Such an interesting lady, your grandmother. A world traveler.” “Yes, she did like to travel.” I pause, thinking about how I used to sit on my Nana’s lap, looking at souvenirs that she’d brought back from various places in the world. The strange objects she returned with never failed to fascinate. “Are the two of you original to this area?” “We are. Our families have lived here for many generations. But both of our children have moved out of state.” “Where do they live?” “Our son, Harold Jr. is in Florida and our daughter, Debbie lives in New Hampshire. Debbie isn’t that far of a drive, so we see her a couple of times a year, on holidays usually. Harold Jr., we see once or twice. He tries to convince us to move down near him, but I like having the 4 seasons, and Florida is so hot in the summer. What do you do Anna?” “I have my own coffee shop that I co own with a friend of mine.” “Isn’t that nice.” “I enjoy it. It was a lot of work to get started, but now that it’s established it’s going well.” “And how are your parents? Are they still working?” “No, they took early retirement. My Dad plays a lot of golf and my Mom does volunteer work at the hospital. They keep pretty busy.” “Do you live near your parents?” “About twenty minutes away by car.” “How nice.” “It is, I’m an only child, so I think they like having me around.” We chat for a while, until I drain my coffee cup and glance out the window. The snow is still

falling heavily, and it’s starting to get dark. I stand. “I think I should head out, since the snow is still coming down hard. Thank you for the coffee, it was really nice to meet you both.” Emma comes around the table to give me a hug. “Anna, it was so nice to meet you. Please visit us again if you have a chance.” “I will.” “Be careful driving Anna.” Harold rasps at me. “Will do.” “Do you have experience driving in the snow?” “Just from being here. I’ll be alright, I have 4-wheel drive.” “You could stay over Anna; it looks like the snow is starting to accumulate.” “Thanks for the offer, but I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.” Driving slowly and carefully, I head for the mountain. Town driving was fine because the roads had been plowed, but the mountain is a different story. It’s slippery, even though I have it in 4-wheel drive. Darkness is setting in, and the snow blasts onto my headlights and windshield. Finally reaching the cabin, I pull in and lock up. It’s dark now, eerie, and still, the snow swirling around me as I wade through the soft drifts to the door. Tracks from what look like deer in front of my back door. Unlocking it, I head into the darkened kitchen, promptly tripping over something in the dark. “Damn it.” I find the kitchen light and switch it on. Everything is as it should be, including the candy I left scattered across the table. All at once, the hair on the back of my neck stands up. Looking down, I realize what I tripped over. A pair of men’s gloves. Shaking, I back to the door. Strange, I can’t recall those being there when I left. Feeling spooked, I decide to head to my jeep and go to Valentin’s home. I turn

towards the door and scream. There at my door is a tall dark figure.

Chapter 21

Valentin I pull on my winter jacket and prepare to head out into the storm. I’d already been to Anna’s cabin earlier to recheck the operation of the furnace, but her jeep was gone and all attempts at calling her cell phone had been unsuccessful. The snow falls steadily. She’s used to independence, but I can’t help but feel a little pang of worry about her. The front door opens, and I turn to look, hoping that the person that enters is Anna. It isn’t. “Vladik.” “Valentin.” We size each other up. “Going to see your new love?” Vladik’s tone is slightly mocking. I give him a scowl. “You haven’t told her yet have you?” I remain silent, my mood quickly becoming dark. Vladik stares at me for a moment. “I don’t want to see you go through what you went through with Marina.” I hold my hand up, as if to ward off my brother, but no words come out. There’s just heaviness, like a two ton rhino is sitting on my chest. “Dude. You know I love you man, hell I owe you my life. You stayed and faced Dad, and we both know you didn’t have to.” Vladik pauses, his face serious. “But this girl is young. She’s gonna want to have her own kids. You know how it was with Marina.” My heart constricts. Yeah, how can I forget? Marina wanted a baby so bad, she’d been ready to ask one of my brothers to be a sperm donor. I the arguments, how unhappy she was, and finally I conceded to her wishes. I had an

operation. Two of them. Marina was still unable to conceive, and then she’d gotten the news that she had cancer. Memories of that awful moment haunt me. Marina was unhappy, and I was partly to blame for it, I had delayed in getting the operations. She had been angry and depressed. I wonder what would have happened if I had acted sooner. But that was in the past, and I couldn’t change it. I could only go forward. “I’m leaving.” I move to push past my younger brother. “You haven’t changed. You’re just using her, just like you used all the women before Marina. If she finds out, she won’t want to be with you. You know that.” The scowl returns to my face. “And you little brother. Living here with me again, jobless. You’re just like those women, interested in my money, and Marina? You know the truth of that. She wanted my money too. Anna doesn’t need my money, she makes her own.” I pause, glaring at him, tired of my past behaviors, tired of our family drama that we can’t seem to get past. “And you Vladik? New lady every other week.” “At least I don’t pretend that I’m serious when I’m not. That girl has eyes for you like she’s in love. That’s the dishonest thing.” I turn towards my younger brother. “You surprise me Vladik.” “Why?” “I didn’t know you were such a romantic.” Vladik rolls his eyes. “I don’t like to see women get hurt. I love women, all women. It’s not romantic, it’s honest.” I nod my head. “Your honesty is B.S. I think you’re afraid to have one woman because you don’t want to be close to any one person.” “I don’t want what you and Marina had that’s for sure. Fighting all the fucking time. What’s the point of that? You wouldn’t let her go Valentin. That’s why she died. You could have let her go, but you wouldn’t.”

“I’m not the same person.” I look my brother straight on. “And it’s none of your business what happens with Anna.” “I don’t want to see you get hurt. You’ve been holed up in this goddam mansion for two years. Maybe you should think about being with someone that wants to be around permanently.” “This girl is different.” “She has her own business in North Carolina. Open your eyes Valentin. She is not going to want to move up here and live in this huge mansion with you and then not be able to have kids. It’s like a death sentence.” “Thanks for the advice but coming from you and your history with women.” I shrug my shoulders. “Let’s just say, I’m not sure you’re the one to be giving me advice on love.” “I keep it real.” “You’re never with anyone long enough to be that real.” “Touché.” “I’m going out.” Vladik nods, shrugs his shoulders and heads down the hall, as I stride to the door. Vladik is right. Anna isn’t going to want to give up her business and live up here with me in this empty mansion, a place that I had helped build with my own hands. She’s young, free and when she finds out that I can’t have babies, she’ll probably end this thing we have together. I sit in my truck, engine running and put both hands over my face and rub my beard. With a heavy heart, I drive down the mountain towards Anna’s cabin and the unknown. Vladik’s right about so many things. But I can’t stop the growing feelings I have for Anna. I’m falling in love. Have already fallen. It’s too late to turn back from what I already know. I want Anna in my life, and I need to find out if she can ever feel the same about me. I could try another operation. That’s a possibility. Maybe there’s still hope. But I don’t want to let our lives ride on that. I can’t let things

turn out the way they had with Marina. I promise myself that I won’t. And I need to address the fact that she has her own business. She isn’t going to want to give it all up for me. What the hell am I going to do? Somehow, I’ll find a way. I pull into Anna’s driveway, relieved that her jeep is parked near the cabin. Pausing a moment, I run a hand through my hair and open the truck door. I need to tell her. I’ve been putting it off, but now I must get to it. There’s no point in waiting. If she doesn’t want to stick around after the news, at least she’ll know that I’m not trying to use her for sex. I’m about to knock, when I hear a scream. My pulse kicks it up a notch. “Anna, it’s me, open up.” Anna opens the door to me, her hands over her heart. “You just totally freaked me out.” “I’m sorry I scared you. Are you okay?” I look at her with concern. “I wasn’t expecting anyone at the door. I was just leaving.” “Anna, you shouldn’t be driving in conditions like this. Where were you anyway?” “How did you know I was anywhere?” “I stopped by.” I lean over and pick up the pair of gloves. “Those are yours?” “Yes, I left them. I wanted to make sure you were okay. I tried calling your cell phone, but it went straight to voice mail. I thought I would check your furnace while I was here. I didn’t think you’d mind. I don’t really like you being here by yourself.” Anna leans against a chair and starts to laugh. “This is funny. I knew those weren’t there when I left, and it freaked me out. Something didn’t feel right.” “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Why were you on the road anyway?”

“I went to visit the Bennett’s. I told them I would stop by at some point.” “Anna,” I take her in my arms, looking down into her eyes with a steely look of determination, “I want to lock you up somewhere for your own safety.” My voice hints at my frustration. “Valentin, I’m okay. I live on my own. I take care of myself every day, and see, here I am, I didn’t get stuck in the snow, I know how to use four-wheel drive, and I’m fine.” “Where are you going to go now?” “To your place.” “Really?” A sense of relief floods me. She wants to be with me, and I won’t have to worry about her. “Really. Because someone left their gloves here and made me think that someone was in my house and freaked me out. Maybe I’m going to have to lock you up so you quit causing me trouble.” She raises an eyebrow at me, giving me a smirk. I lean forward and brush her lips with mine. “I’ll stay here with you if you like. Since you were coming to see me.” I want to avoid my brother. It’s time to tell her the truth. “Okay. Sure. Stay here.” I take her hands in mine and notice they’re trembling. “I’m sorry I scared you Anna. I was concerned about you. I drove past your place on my way into town, and I didn’t see your jeep, and then I couldn’t get a hold of you on your cell. I care about you.” “My cell is dead now, but it doesn’t come in up here anyway.” She retrieves it from her pocket and places it on the counter, plugging it in as she speaks. “Want a drink or something? I need one. I’m still shaking.” Anna laughs at herself, as she reaches into the fridge and pulls out a bottle of white wine. Twenty minutes later, we sit in front of a roaring fire in the dark room, sipping wine. The wind howls around the house, as Anna snuggles into my arms,

watching the flames leap and dance in the grate. “You’re quiet.” Anna looks over at me. “Is everything alright?” I run a hand through my hair and hug her with my other arm. “I don’t know.” Anna sits her glass of wine on the coffee table and turns to look at me. I release a sigh and give her a serious glance. This is uncomfortable. “I feel that I need to be honest with you about something.” Anna faces me, her light eyes looking troubled. “Okay.” “I told you that my wife couldn’t conceive.” Anna nods her head. “I didn’t tell you why.” I take a deep breath. Will she want to end our relationship after I tell her that it’s my fault? This is uncomfortable and awkward, but I carry on anyway. “It isn’t Marina’s fault that she couldn’t conceive. It was mine.” Anna is silent and serious faced, clearly focused on what I’m saying. “I had an injury when I was a young teen, and it didn’t heal. I didn’t know it at the time, but I found out after I was married. Marina and I tried to conceive, but it wasn’t happening. We found out the cause, it was my previous injury. She convinced me to try an operation, and I had two, but they were unsuccessful.” I meet her gaze. “I shoot blanks.” Anna waits for me to finish speaking. Needing space from my uncomfortable emotions, I stand and walk to the window, looking out into the dim sky. “I never expected to rush into a relationship like this, and I don’t want to give you a false impression about myself. But I felt that you should know.” Anna gets up and walks towards me. She doesn’t speak any words; she simply wraps her arms around me and hugs me to her. A wave of emotion comes over me. I’m supposed to be her protector, and she’s protecting me. I feel it in her body. I grip her tightly, worried about what lies in

store for us. Worried that I might not have her in my life in the future. We remain in silence for several moments, the snow blowing giant drifts outside the cabin. “I’m so sorry Valentin.” She draws back and looks up at me, eyes misty. There’s empathy for me in her clear eyes. “I’m glad that you told me.” “I had to tell you Anna, because I want you in my life, and this is a big thing.” Waiting for her response is agony. “Valentin, I’d be a shallow person if I said I didn’t want to be with you because you can’t give me a baby.” The way she says it, makes me realize that she must have at least thought about the two of us having a baby together. I need to tell her the rest of it. This can’t turn out the way it had with Marina. “I didn’t tell you everything Anna.” We sit back down on the sofa and Anna takes my hand. “What is it?” “Marina wanted one of my brother’s to be a surrogate father, and I refused her.” She hesitates. “That’s understandable. For both of you.” I nod. “But I haven’t changed. I wouldn’t be okay with that. It would change things in our family. It would mean that…” “That Marina would have shared a very close bond with one of your brothers.” “Yes. To have one of my brothers be the father of my kid with my wife.” Anna puts a hand on my arm. “You don’t have to explain. I get that.” “You do?” “Yes.” “Vladik offered to be the surrogate.” “I see.”

“I don’t hate him for it. He said he wouldn’t interfere. He said I was selfish for denying her.” Anna responds by crawling into my lap and burying her face in my neck. I breathe in the scent of her strawberry scented hair, as she wraps her arms around my neck in a gesture of comfort. Her warmth lifts me out of the darkness of my thoughts. We stay like this for a long while. Thirty minutes later she’s asleep. Lifting her gently, I place her underneath the down comforter on her bed and kiss her cheek. Anna stirs and drifts back to sleep. I watch her sleep, the rise and fall of her chest, her hand making twitching motions as she dreams. I get in beside her and draw her to me. It takes me a while for me to get to sleep. Before I drift off, I determine inside myself that I’ll get another operation, more than one if need be. I want to be with Anna if she’ll have me. And if she does, I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make her happy. I’d made dumb, selfish mistakes with Marina, I’m not going to do that again. This time around, I’ll make it right.

Chapter 22

Anna The sound of the wind blowing around the cabin awakens me. It takes me a few seconds to realize where I am. My dream comes back to me, vivid and real. I’d been running through a field of tall grass towards a baby held by a familiar figure. As I approach, the figure walks towards me holding a baby girl. “Nana.” I call my grandmother’s name, looking in awe as my grandmother hands me the baby. The baby has blue eyes and blond curly hair. I receive the bundle from my grandmother and cuddle her. The dream fades. ing the conversation of the previous night, I push it away, wondering if Valentin is still here. In my memory of last night, there is a vague awareness of him crawling into bed beside me and holding me tightly as I slept, but after that I was out. It’s still snowing, but lightly. Footsteps sound on the hard wood floor, and the Tsar appears by the door with two steaming mugs of coffee. “Morning.” I smile up at him, pushing my bedhead mop of hair back from my face. “Morning.” He smiles back and sits down at the edge of the bed. “You were very tired last night.” Worry lines crowd his face. Everything feels heavy, unresolved. Is he afraid of losing me? Or is he thinking of his wife? I don’t want to waste my life thinking about what can’t be changed. He can’t have kids. Shitty deal, but it’s not his fault. I can still enjoy his company, enjoy this day, this beautiful wintry spring morning, instead of getting all worried over the future. There’s a lot to consider, but in a place deep inside me there’s the realization that I want this man in my life, one way or another. I’m just not sure yet how that will be possible. And yeah, not being able to have biological children with this man is not going to be an easy thing to deal with. I’m on the same page as him regarding ever asking his brothers to be surrogate fathers. I only know Vladik and can’t imagine having a baby with someone like him. The thought is repulsive. But Valentin’s wife had obviously been desperate

enough to want something like that. I need to be real with myself, and it that I don’t know what I’d be willing to do, if I feel the desperate need to have my own child. I already imagined having a baby with Valentin, so for sure, my biological inclination is humming along in the background. The thought of not being able to have a baby with him hurts, and I can only imagine what it must be like for him to deal with that crushing knowledge every day of his life. If I stay with him, we’d have to adopt. The thoughts ripple through my brain as I smile at him and gratefully sip the coffee. No point in dwelling on it. Today is a new day, and I decide that it’s going to be an awesome day. “Anna?” He looks at me with the kindest smile, the one that makes my heart melty inside. “Sorry, I was thinking. Yeah, I was tired last night. Must have been the workout I had yesterday in your truck and all the shoveling I did. How much snow did we get?” “About a foot. I think it’s tapering off, so the roads should be cleared soon up this way.” “Want to go snowboarding today once it clears?” “I would like to go skiing with you once it clears.” “Come on. You’ve never gone snowboarding, have you?” “I have. I prefer skis.” “That means you’re an old timer.” “Do you know what happens to sassy mouthed young women like you Anna?” “What?” I ask, the challenge in my eyes. “They get taken over the knee.” “You wouldn’t.” “I would.”

“I’m still drinking my coffee.” I peep at him over the rim of my cup, testing the challenge in his eyes. “I have a long memory.” A hint of a smile plays about his mouth. After a breakfast of cold cereal, we head into the snow, shoveling a path from the door to the vehicles and the shed. As we finish, we hear the gravely sound of a snowplow heading up the mountain. “Ready to ski?” “Snowboard.” We pile into his truck and head down the mountain. The roads are freshly plowed, the grey clouds roll away, and the sun appears, gleaming with intensity off the fields of snow. It’s going to be a great day for hitting the slopes. All thoughts of last night’s baby conversation leave me as I start to imagine snowboarding for the first time in my life. A whoosh of nervousness shoots through my belly. Jay Peak is a goodly drive, and as the Tsar’s truck climbs the long mountain road, my nervousness hits me full force. How am I going to learn this skill without making some falls? There are probably going to be some. My clammy hand reaches for Valentin’s sweater clad arm. “I’m nervous. You’re experienced, and I’m a complete novice. I won’t be able to keep up with you.” He chuckles. “It’s normal to be nervous. I think you’ll be okay as long as you have the right equipment.” I release a sigh. “Yep. I can do this.” I look up at the looming mountain. It’s huge. “I’ve always wanted to do this.” We leave the truck at the base of the mountain. Valentin carries his skis, and we head to the ski shop to get a rental board for me. Being a Saturday, it’s a bit of a line, but we joke around while we wait. Eventually, I’m sized up and given a board, boots, helmet, and goggles. There’s a large amount of fresh powder on the ground, which is fortunate for me, because as soon as we hit the bunny slopes, I take quite a few falls. It’s not as

easy as it looks, even more embarrassing for me, because little kids zip by me with no problem at all. Valentin is very patient, trying to explain to me how to lean back and get enough momentum in the powder to keep going. After an hour, I lie back into a snow drift and look up at Valentin. “Are you getting extremely bored?” “Not at all, I enjoy watching you. You’re very persistent.” “Liar. You’re right. This is a lot harder than it looks.” “Why don’t you try skis? It might be easier to learn. The snowplow is a bit simpler than learning to ride the edge of a board.” “You do know how to ride a board.” He nods and winks at me. The man is a mystery to me, but I have a feeling that he was trying to play his abilities down so we could be together. I’m disappointed that I can’t get it quickly, especially after watching kids sail by me like pros. But I take his advice. Valentin escorts me back to the ski shop and I exchange my board for some short skis, which I hope will allow me to at least go to the top of the mountain. We stop at the snack bar on the way, grabbing burgers, fries, and cokes, and find a little spot, amidst the throng of people to consume our meal. This place is paradise. The sun shines its liquid rays down the mountain, the tram whooshes by overhead, and loads of happy people mill about. I observe it all with great enjoyment. We polish off every morsel of food, and I’m ready to try again. Valentin gives me the basics. Heading back down the bunny slope, I hate to it it, but Valentin is right. The short skis are a heck of a lot easier to maneuver around with and control. After two runs on the bunny slope, which I figure must be excruciatingly boring for him, I announce that I’m ready to head to the top of the mountain. “We could take a chair up part way to start. You are just getting the hang of this.” “I want to go up in the tram. I’ve never been on one. I’m sure there is a great view at the top.” I say, flashing a wide smile at him.

“Alright, but leave it open to yourself to come back down on it if you’re scared.” He grins at me. “I’m not going to be scared.” I chuck his arm lightly, coming back at him, despite the jumpy feeling in the pit of my stomach. I am a bit scared and getting more so as we ascend the mountain in the swaying tram car. Valentin’s hand finds the small of my back, as I gaze down the slopes from our heightened position. My hands are clammy, and my stomach has the sensation of a million dancing butterflies. Why didn’t I take his advice and go part of the way up? The tram swings slightly on its cable as it climbs, rocking us gently. “Are these things perfectly safe?” I whisper, my eyes fixed on the ground far beneath us. “As far as I know.” He whispers. “Don’t look down. Look out at the view.” The peak of the mountain looms ahead of us, at almost 4000 feet above sea level. A tiny building sits atop the mountain, and the car rocks as it pulls into the dock. We wait patiently for people to disembark, but the jittery feeling in my stomach is getting worse. Why didn’t I listen? I ask myself. Skis over our shoulders, we clump onto the platform and into the building, looking through the large scenic glass windows. The view is astounding. “Are you alright? You look pale.” The Tsar puts a reassuring hand on my back. “I’m good.” “We can always take the car back down if you’re having second thoughts.” “No, I can do this. Besides, you’ve been on the bunny slopes with me for hours. I’m sure you’re bored stiff.” “No, Anna I’m not in the least. You’re naturally athletic, and I can see that you’re getting the hang of things. It just takes time. I enjoy being with you. Seeing your firsts.” His deep warm eyes connect with mine and I have a feeling that he is referring to our firsts together in the bedroom too. He smiles and gives my hand a firm squeeze.

“Good, because I’m having a great time, I just don’t want to slow you down. You’re probably used to ripping down the mountain at top speed.” We head outside and pull on our skis. “Anna, I’ll go first, and you follow. Snowplow. That will slow you down if you get going too fast. Ready?” I’m lying, I’m nervous as hell, my legs literally shaking in my boots, but I follow him, and I don’t fall because I’m traveling at a snail’s pace. The Tsar leads me down an intermediate trail marked the Vermonter. It’s a bit scary in some places, but I do a lot of snowplowing, watching as Valentin skillfully slaloms from side to side, skis parallel. He stops when the trail changes, backtracking across the mountain. “Anna, here’s your trail,” he points at the sign marked Angel’s Wiggle. “I hope it is. Show me how to slalom, I want to keep my skis closer together.” The Tsar shows me how to shift my weight, keeping my knees bent, and to weave from side to side across the trail. While he gives me the lesson, I notice people heading into the woods on narrow trails. “I want to try that,” I point towards a kid who disappears into the glades. “After you’ve done a few runs we will.” We finish on Raccoon Run, one of the easy slopes I practiced on earlier. Taking the chair back up, we make several more runs up and down the mountain, trying different trails, most of them marked easy or intermediate. Exhilaration begins to fill me, I’m starting to get the hang of it, and I’ve only fallen a few times. “I’m ready for the glades now,” I say to him, as we head up on the swaying chair lift. “Alright, let’s do it. Be careful Anna, some of the paths haven’t been cut yet and they can be hard to maneuver. If you get going too fast, make yourself fall. I don’t want to see you hit a tree.”

“I’ll do my best.” I’m still a bit shaky from adrenaline, but as our eyes search each other’s, he leans over and gently grazes my lip glossed lips with his firm ones. “I have no doubt of that, whatsoever.” He whispers, his hand deftly gliding up my leg towards the juncture of my thighs. A thrill of another kind shoots through me. We disembark and head for the glades. Valentin heads onto a narrow trail cut among the snow frosted pines. Following slowly behind, the calm awe of being in a snow-covered forest sweeps over me. Alone, we move in wide swaths between the trees. The trail begins shallowly, and I find it easy to follow, but soon it becomes steeper, and the jitters return. Valentin stops ahead of me, looking back up the steep hill to see if I’m okay. Gathering my courage, I shoot down at a quick pace. Too quick. Feeling out of control and unable to snowplow because of the narrowness of the powdered trail, I sit back, trying to fall. Instead of stopping, I keep going, taking a wild ride through the trees on my ass and my skis. “Anna!” Too late! Narrowly missing a tree, I tumble, losing a ski and coming to a rolling stop right at the Tsar’s feet. “Anna, are you alright?” I stand slowly, shaking off the snow. “All parts seem to be ed for. But my heart is pounding.” My laugh is oddly shaky. The sun is sinking low in the sky when we head into the sky lodge. Valentin brings us some food and drinks and we sit, side by side with a view of the mountainside. My extremities begin to thaw as I sip my hot tea. I’m elated, a whole new world has opened to me, and I’m sitting here next to the nicest, sexiest man I’ve ever met. “What do you think Anna?” His smile is wide. “Like it?” “I love it. Thank you so much for teaching me. I’m having so much fun, Valentin. I didn’t realize what I was missing out on with all these winter sports.

It’s incredible.” After a few more runs down the mountain, we decide to call it quits for the day. The sun is setting as Valentin pulls the truck onto the road. Dropping back into the leather seat, I watch as the red-orange glow from the sunset casts a wide line over the horizon and disappears. It’s on the ride home that the doubts start to creep in. The ones that say, better get out of this relationship before you get hurt. You’re going to want your own kids. You’ll never have that with this man. Your business is important, this relationship will never work. He won’t want to move to where you are. You’ll have to be away from your family and friends. I give Valentin a sideways glance. He gives me a little smile, and I give him one back, wondering if he feels as uneasy as I do.

Chapter 23

Valentin “Know what I could go for right now?” “A soak in the tub?” “Did you read my mind?” She looks sideways at me. “Are you like Señora Madora, reading things into the future?” “Señora Madora? What has she told you Anna?” “Nothing much.” Anna hedges. “In your case, I think you just know me well enough.” “In that case, I am seeing you stay with me tonight and taking a long hot bath in my Jacuzzi tub. How’s that for a prediction?” “Valentin.” She says, ignoring my prediction. “Yes Anna?” “Does Señora Madora think I’m a loose woman?” I look at her with mock seriousness. “Yes, she thinks you are a wild untamed hussy.” She punches my arm. “Hey! Watch it, I’m driving.” “Be serious.” “She likes you Anna. You have no worries there.” “I feel weird about it. I’m not used to this…” she pauses, “I come from a conservative family. Not Bible thumping or anything but…” she stops. “Want me to give you a separate bedroom? Would that make you feel better?” Her doubts about sex makes me wonder what’s going on inside her head. She’d

been so carefree all day, and now, she’s closing down on me. Is she having second thoughts about being with me? Is it because I told her I couldn’t give her biological kids at this point? Is she trying to spare my feelings about not being able to provide a biological kid that she’s reverting to talking about Señora Madora and how she comes from a conservative family? Anna has been acting like a nympho, no complaints from me, but I don’t think these feelings she’s having are solely about how she’s jumped off her family’s conservative bandwagon. Maybe I’m wrong. Anna laughs. “I don’t know. I don’t feel right about having a fling.” “Is that what this is to you Anna, a fling?” Unintentionally, my response has a hard edge to it. “I don’t know what to call it. I mean we live so far apart, and I’m not here for that long.” I’m silent for a moment. What does she want? Not me obviously, not tonight anyway. Pulling up to her house, I come around to open her door. Anna slides into my arms. “Anna, I want you to know something. What I feel for you doesn’t fall into the category of a fling.” Her light eyes look up into mine in the darkness. I sense doubt in her. And fear. There’s nothing to do but give her space. “I had an amazing day with you, Anna.” Her arms release me, and I exhale and let her go. “I’m going to head in. Thank you for everything. I had a great time with you today, Valentin.” She turns her face away from me, her hair making a wall over the side of her face, which makes me wonder how much of herself she hides from me. I walk beside her to her door. She turns to me but keeps her eyes on the ground. “Are you alright Anna?”

She looks up at me, her eyes catching moonlight and reflecting tears in the corners of her eyes. “Yeah. I have a lot on my mind, and I’m tired. I’m going in.” My heart feels like a sledgehammer is being taken to it, but I let her go. “Goodnight Valentin. Thanks again for a great time.” A flash of disappointment crosses my face. “You’re welcome. I had a very enjoyable day with you too.” I kiss the tips of her fingers. “Brunch tomorrow at my house and then sled riding?” “Sounds like fun. I bought a sled. I’m up for it.” “I’ll pick you up at 10.” “I can drive up.” “I’ll pick you up, it’s a date.” “Ok fine, you can pick me up, as long as you promise to bring me back.” She gives me a teasing smile. “I make no promises. Good night Anna.” I watch her move about her cabin as she turns the lights on, moving from room to room. It’s with a heavy heart that I put the truck in gear and rumble down the dirt road away from her. It takes everything in me not to go back. But I know I need to give her space, let her figure it out. When I get home, I’m going to find a way to get healed. Somehow it must be possible. It’s been over two years since Marina’s death, maybe there are treatments that have been developed during that time. At least the thought gives me hope. Vladik’s car and someone else’s is parked out front when I pull up to my home. Lights are on in the club room, and through the window, I make out Vladik and a female figure. Vladik has her in his arms.

It makes me think back to the first night Anna came to dinner, and it gives me heart pangs to think about it. I’m missing her something fierce. The woman is in my heart and there is no getting her out.

Chapter 24

Anna I stand at the window, watching as he heads off into the dusky evening, sending a flurry of powdered snow behind his truck. Too exhausted to cook, I raid the fridge, sitting down to a couple slices of bread and peanut butter and a glass of milk. Regretting my decision not to go with the Tsar, I decide to take a hot bath to get rid of the chill I’m feeling. Stripping off my clothing in the bedroom, I leave a large pile on the floor, walking stark naked and cold into the bathroom. Not caring that I haven’t gotten curtains for the window yet. Glum and moody, I turn on the tap and fill the tub with extra hot water. Steam rises from the tub in little curling wisps, and I stick a toe in gingerly, trying to adjust to the heat. Finally, I submerge myself, feeling the intensity of the heat penetrate my sore muscles and tired body. There are a few bruises scattered over my legs from falling. Scenes from the day flash through my mind. The Tsar’s patience with me, his kindness, his wanting me to be at his home. Why did dating have to be so difficult? “This figures,” I say aloud to myself, “I finally meet a guy I really like, and we live 800 miles apart.” Eventually, the water begins to cool, and I get out, toweling off and heading for the bedroom. My Nana’s journal sits at the foot of the bed. Donning warm pajamas, I pick up the journal, fix myself a mug of hot chocolate, and head for the fireplace. I load a few logs onto the grate, stuffing old newspaper underneath them. In moments, the print is ablaze, and the wood begins to burn. It’s a cheerful sight and lifts my spirits. Sitting on the rug in front of the fireplace, I sip the hot chocolate as I read, feeling the warmth of the fire spread over my back. September 14, 1956 My last year of school has begun. Charlene already knows what she’s going to do when she’s finished. Set up house with Jimmy. She confided in me today that she’s in the family way. Might be going out of state to live with her aunt for a while, at least until she gets married. Had a feeling that was coming. I’m not ready for that yet. Maybe after I get to

see the world and travel a bit. I babysat for the neighbors down the street the other night, and their two kids are brats. ‘Not for me,’ I said to myself after being there for ten minutes. I hope Charlene is happy. I guess Jimmy will do all right. He has a job at his Dad’s gas station, and she told me her parents are going to help them buy a house. She’s very keen on the whole thing. Maybe if I was engaged to James T. Maxwell I would feel differently. I might want to have a baby with him. (Hope Mother never reads this) He hasn’t written me back yet. I wonder if he thinks of me every day as I do of him. Time will tell. Shoot, gotta go. Mother is calling me to help with dinner. Will write later.

September 15, 1956 Asked Charlene to go hiking with me today, it was so warm out and beautiful. The sky was completely clear. She ed me up to spend time with Jimmy. I don’t see her as much anymore. I took my watercolors up to Falcon Hill. I tried painting the view. Didn’t come out like I wanted. Would like to go to art school, but Father reminds me that there aren’t very many opportunities around for artists. Mother would like to see me married off; she hints that college might be a good place to meet someone.

September 20, 1956 Took a walk to the cemetery and back. Looked at the gravesites. Mother thinks I am strange to spend so much time by myself, but I like coming here. It’s peaceful. Reminds me to grab life fully because we don’t live very long. I saw 2 graves of children as I was wandering around. How sad to have your life cut off so young.

September 23, 1956

Haven’t heard from James T. yet. I’m starting to think I never will. Father says he’s too old for me anyway and that there are other fish in the sea. As if that helps.

October 1, 1956 Met a new boy at school today. His name is John Collins. He is very tall and has dreamy looking eyes. I tried to sketch him in history class. He may have noticed me looking at him because he came up to me after class and introduced himself. I was kind of embarrassed because I thought he might have seen me, but he didn’t mention it. He seems very nice. Said his fathers’ job has them moving around a lot. Military family I would guess.

October 3, 1956 Mary Jones stole my sketch of John Collins out of my notebook and showed him. She is pure evil. I was so embarrassed, but he was very nice about it. Said I have talent. That put Mary in her place. Still, I don’t know what he must think of me for that.

October 4, 1956 John Collins asked to sit with me at lunch today. He is a very interesting person. He has lived in a lot of places around the world like Hawaii. How lucky for him! His Dad is a naval officer. I wish I could see exotic places like that. He said it was okay but moving around so much isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. I think I would have liked it.

October 5, 1956

John Collins asked me to the sock hop next Saturday. I said ‘yes’. Charlene says we look good together. I still don’t see her too much. I guess that’s normal, but it’s not the same anymore.

October 7, 1956 Charlene asked me to hike with her this afternoon. I was surprised. We climbed Falcon Hill and looked at the view and talked about life. She told me she’s tired a lot and sick. Her mother told her she was going to live with her aunt out of state till the marriage. She cried about it. Said it’s hard. I felt bad for her. I’m really going to miss my best friend. I asked her what it was like to do it for the first time. She said they did it in Jimmy’s car, and it wasn’t a planned thing, but it felt really good. I wonder when I will experience that.

October 19, 1956 John Collins asked me to the Halloween dance with him. Said, ‘yes.’

November 1, 1956 Charlene left today to stay with her aunt. I wish she didn’t have to go. Her mother wanted her to leave before she started to show. Senior year was supposed to be the best. It’s going to be lonely without her here to laugh with. And who’s going to play pranks on Mr. Michaelson with me? It won’t be the same. Sometimes growing up isn’t too fun. The Halloween dance was fun. I used to think John Collins was too serious, but he has a very fun side to him. We papered the town and soaped Mary Jones’

car. She deserved it after what she said about Charlene. What a snoot. Her dad almost caught us, but we ducked behind some cars. I think my dad knew what we were up to, but he didn’t say anything.

November 9, 1956 I got a job, working after school at Angelo’s Coffee Shop. It keeps me busy. I’m trying to save for my own car.

February 11, 1956 John Collins asked me to go steady with him. I said ‘yes’. Father told me he likes John. Said he’s got a good head on his shoulders.

February 14, 1956 John gave me a Valentine today. He wrote in it that he loves me. I made him a big heart cookie the size of a dinner plate. He said he liked it. It feels like we are getting more serious. I wish Charlene were here. Mother is uncomfortable talking about girl things. I think I love John too. He is very handsome. I just wonder how to tell for sure. He told me he’s going into the Navy. He wants to be a fighter pilot. It sounds exciting for a guy. He hints that he wants to marry me. The journal entries end here, and I close it slowly, placing it on the coffee table. It’s interesting to think of my Nana as a young girl, making decisions about her future, falling in love, having dreams of traveling. Things don’t change much; I think to myself. Everyone must make the big decisions about who to fall in love with and who to marry. After placing another log on the fire, I sit cross legged and stare into the flames. If there was a phone, I’d call Rachel and talk. Rachel’s a grounding force in my

life. But I don’t have a phone. I have myself. If Valentin and I are going to be together, who’s going to move? He can’t expect me to, I have a business. I can’t expect him to, he has a business. If we’re going to be together, one of us is going to have to compromise.

Chapter 25

Anna The Tsar picks me up the next morning at 10. Barely awake, I slide into his truck. “I don’t know if you can tell, but my brain has not yet begun to function properly.” “Haven’t had your coffee yet?” “No. I overslept. Skiing took a lot out of me yesterday.” Valentin isn’t very talkative, and I look over at him. “Are you mad at me for not inviting you stay over last night?” “No, I’m not mad, Anna. Impatient? Yes.” He gives me a grin. “Because I want to be with you every second I can. But we must give each other what we each need, and sometimes those needs don’t match.” “I feel bad. I didn’t want to hurt you.” “Don’t. I don’t need your guilt. I want you. When you’re ready.” “Okay.” I nod my head and gaze out the window. “Don’t be annoyed at me Anna.” I turn my head towards him. “Why?” “I invited Vladik and his lady friend to sled and snowmobile with us.” “That should be a testosterone fueled ride. I don’t know if I want to be on the back if you two are at the helm. I’ve seen you guys go at it.” I cross my arms over my chest. “You’ll like it.” “Ha. I don’t know about that.”

Vladik and his lady friend greet us at the front door with wide smiles. Tanya hugs me and then hugs Valentin. I give Vladik a discreet glare that means ‘don’t touch me’. He leaves me alone but gives me a wink. Twenty minutes later, after introductions are made with Vladik’s new friend, Tanya, we’re seated in the dining room digging into the brunch that Señora Madora prepared. It’s a feast. Omelets made with mushrooms, peppers and ham, French toast swirled with cinnamon sugar, crispy slices of bacon, and home fries, sliced oranges and strawberries, steaming coffee and cream cheese strudel. Silence descends over the table as we gorge ourselves with food. I observe the crew. Tanya looks like the female version of Vladik, tall, blond, and overtly confident. Though instead of a Russian accent, hers hails from New Jersey. I’m not surprised to learn that she specializes in Swedish massage and tantric yoga. Definitely Vladik’s type. Señora Madora bustles in, beaming at us for our appetites and offers more coffee. I’m the first to comment, “Señora Madora, this is excellent. Thank you so much.” The rest offer their appreciation, and she leaves us to linger over our coffee and conversation, humming a little Spanish tune to herself. “Ready for sledding?” The Tsar asks us. “Oh, I thought we were going to go snowmobiling,” Tanya says in a nasally tone, as she touches the arm of Valentin lightly and flirtatiously, her ample cleavage exposed, as she leans towards him. I can’t help but wish that Tanya would’ve left her tantra moves at home. Valentin ignores Tanya. “Anna? What do you want to do you? What’s first?” He moves his arm away from Tanya’s grasp and catches my eye. This must be what he felt when Vladik caught me on the stairs. Super annoyed. “Yeah, that’s alright. Señora Madora’s cooking has me so full, that I’m not sure I’m ready to navigate the hill climb after the ride down.” Vladik asserts his agreement, standing to help Tanya with her chair, winking at

me as Valentin moves away from the table. I look quickly away, still feeling like I’d like to slap Tanya for touching the Tsar. The Tsar helps me with my chair, and we move to the hall closet and pull on ski pants and jackets. A short time later, we pile onto the snowmobiles and head out into the blinding white glare of the snow, which reflects the sun like many faceted diamonds. Racing over the packed snow, I cling to the Tsar’s waist, feeling the exhilaration of blazing across the snow at top speed. The Tsar and his brother race side by side, whipping up a fine cloud of snow particles in their wake. Tanya waves to me, clearly enjoying herself. I wave back, wishing I could be alone with Valentin, feeling the spray of the snow whipping over my body. For the most part, it’s exactly as I’d predicted it, a 200-horse powered rivalry between the men. When they’ve finally gotten it out of their systems, we head back. I’m starting to get cold, and I’m glad for the chance to warm up. “That was so much fun, I haven’t done that in ages,” Tanya gushes at the Tsar. I glance over at the woman, feeling my blood pressure rise as Tanya put her arms around the Tsar and thanks him with a hug. Valentin is polite. That’s his nature. But this woman? I want to smack her. I catch myself as the nasty thoughts come. We’re not serious. It’s not like we’ve talked about being boyfriend and girlfriend or anything. He’s a good-looking man, desirable in every way, put together, a self-made man, and sexy vigorous. Of course, women are going to find him attractive. I take a deep breath, walk over to Valentin, and grab his hand. We head inside to warm up, as Vladik flashes me a look. He knows I’m pissed off, and he thinks it’s amusing. The thought burns me, and I look away from him, avoiding his gaze. It isn’t surprising that he offered to be the father of Marina’s child. He obviously likes all females all the time, whether or not he has a date. After cocktails and soaking in the warmth of the fireplace, we head back out into the whirling snow. Large pretty flakes are falling, and I catch a few on my tongue. Tanya sidles up to me, while the Tsar and Vladik head for the shed to retrieve the sleds.

“Nice set up here isn’t it?” She says, with a speculative gleam in her eye. “It is a nice place, beautiful view.” I walk faster, attempting to catch up with the guys. “I hear the Tsar’s wife, god rest her soul, tricked him into marrying her. “Of course, no could do that now.” She looks pointedly at me, as though checking to see if I know that Valentin can’t have his own offspring. I stop, looking at Tanya straight on. “Where did you hear something as horrible as that?” “Vladik told me. The family knew. She couldn’t keep something like that a secret for long. Oh, yeah, it’s true. She told him she was pregnant, so he’d marry her. Wouldn’t be the first time a woman tried that little tactic.” She removes her mitten so she can inspect her fingernail. “Darn it, I just had these done, and one is chipped already.” Looking back up at me, she continues, “Don’t look so shocked Anna, why if you didn’t have your sights set on him, I probably would make a play for the older brother myself. He’s a dream.” “You’re with Vladik aren’t you?” “We’re friends.” “This is becoming a weird conversation for me.” “I didn’t mean to offend you Anna, but you aren’t going to stay around, are you? And when you’re gone… All’s fair in love…” Tanya flashes her white teeth and continues. “Vladik told me that his brother is a very lonely man. He needs someone who is here for him.” “I’m not sure what you’re suggesting, but you’re here with Vladik, and I’m here with Valentin. Let’s leave it at that.” Feeling repulsed and irritated, I turn away and head for the shed. Obviously, Valentin and Marina went through a lot together, and there’s a lot I don’t know about the family dynamics. But I’m learning. The guys retrieve the two toboggans and head our way, a welcome interruption. “Let’s race!” Challenges Vladik.

We walk through a grove of trees to get to a clearing, arriving at the top of a long hill that heads down the mountain. Mounting the sleds, the girls sit in front of the guys and we’re off, swooping down the path that the snowmobiles cut into the snow. The packed snow makes for a fast ride, and we sail down the hill, Tanya screaming the entire way. I begin to wish that it will all be over soon. Tanya is getting on my nerves. Like. Seriously. The woman was challenging me. We aren’t mares competing for the prized stud! And telling me that Marina tricked the Tsar into marrying her. What does she think? I’m going to do that? Repulsive. It’s a tie. The sleds stop at a flat spot, near a forest of pine trees frosted with snow. The Tsar leans over, whispering in my ear, “You’re quiet, Anna. Is anything wrong?” I point in the direction of the copse of pines. There peeking out at us is a male fawn and a mother deer. Their ears flicker slightly, but they give no indication of being afraid of us humans. A large buck walks into view, and the three of them kick up their hooves and take off at a gallop through the snow. “How beautiful.” I turn towards the Tsar and smile. He smiles at the sight, and then his expression turns serious. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing. Got a lot on my mind. That’s all.” He studies my face, searching for the answer to his question. I’m not about to bring it up now, not with Vladik and Tanya around. We hear yelling and our attention moves up the hill. We watch as Vladik lifts a screaming Tanya in the air and throws her down into a snow drift. They’re laughing, carrying on like kids. “You seem subdued today,” the Tsar says to me. Before I can say anything, a snowball hits me square on the back. “Sorry Anna, I meant that for my brother,” Vladik yells out. Tanya’s already packing a snowball and launching it towards Vladik, even as I

reach down for my own snowball to retaliate. “I’ll get him for you Anna,” Tanya yells out, hitting Vladik squarely in the groin. Vladik releases a groan and collapses into the snow. “Oh. Vlady. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hit you there.” Tanya tries to suppress her laughter and stands over Vladik with a hand over her mouth. A flurry of snowballs is launched against Vladik at first, and then it’s everyone for themselves in a free for all. Laughing, we trudge up the snow-covered hill, ready to swoop down the hill again. After an hour of sledding, Tanya declares exhaustion, sinking into a pile of snow. Vladik flops down beside her. I look over at Valentin. He exchanges a glance with me, his expression seemingly unhappy. “I’m heading inside.” I declare and pick up the rope on my sled. Valentin walks silently beside me. Unavoidable trouble seems to be brewing between us.

Chapter 26

Valentin The four of us enter the house, stamping like horses, out of breath from playing in the snow. “This has been the best day,” Tanya declares. I observe Anna. She remains near the door, an annoyed expression on her face. She’s been different since last night, and I wonder what’s going through her head, she’d been fun loving up till this point. Turning in my direction, she raises an eyebrow and points outside towards my truck. “Can you give me a ride home now? I have to take care of some things.” Vladik interjects, “Anna don’t leave us, we can play air hockey. The Americans verses the Russians.” “I’ll take a rain check.” I pull my coat back on. “Sure.” I say, with a question mark in my expression. Tanya doesn’t appear to care, “Let her alone, she has stuff she needs to take care of.” Anna says her ‘goodbyes’ and waits for me to open the truck door for her. Neither one of us speaks much on the drive to Anna’s cabin. I park and walk her to the door. “Want to come inside?” “I would. I’d like to know what’s going on Anna. You’re not acting like yourself.” Unlocking the door, Anna steps over to the coffee maker and sets about preparing a strong brew. She looks as though she’s gathering her thoughts. I walk over to her and put a hand on her arm. My thoughts are wildly roaming. Is she leaving early for North Carolina? Is she having second thoughts as a couple and wants to get away? “What’s wrong Anna?”

She turns and looks at me straight on. “I don’t like your brother’s girlfriend or friend or whatever she is. Sorry to be so blunt, Valentin. She aggravates me.” She looks apologetic and kind of mad at the same time. I feel so much relief, that I release a laugh. “My God Anna, is that all it is? I thought you were going to say you were leaving early for North Carolina or something. What did she say to you? I saw her talking to you when we were getting the sleds. Did she offend you?” “She said some things. And she kept touching you whenever she had the chance. It was getting me extremely annoyed. I don’t want anyone touching my man. Not that we are boyfriend/ girlfriend or you’re my man because well, we haven’t really talked about it. I’m kind of like a loose girlfriend, which, in my mother’s circle of friends they call ‘sluts’.” Fire sparks in her eyes when she says, ‘my man’ and it sends a jolt of electricity straight to my groin. I’m her man. She called me her man. I have hope with her. “I want to be your man and you can be my loose girlfriend or slut.” I tease. She shoots me a look. “You’re not jealous of Tanya, are you?” I say, searching her eyes in a mischievous manner. “No, I’m not jealous, old man,” she snaps back. “That’s twice today that you’ve called me an old man.” I move closer to her, purposely threatening her with my size. I want to scare her, tease her, and possess her. “You’re a mouthy brat, and I have half a mind to spank your ass.” Anna takes a step back from me and grips the back of the chair for protection. I’ve taken her by surprise. “You wouldn’t.” I step closer, “I would. You need a spanking on your sassy little ass.” “I can assure you, I don’t.”

I move nearer, blocking her into the corner, and begin unbuttoning the front of my plaid flannel and removing my undershirt until I stand bare chested before her. She gives my muscular body a look of appreciation. “This is going to happen Anna.” Her cheeks flush, and her eyes go wide. She believes me. “You’ve been a naughty girl, Anna, sulking and pouting like a spoiled brat, making me take you home early because you don’t like my company, and calling me names on top of it. So now you’re going to see what the old man can do.” With a stern, authoritative stance, I let her know exactly what I’m going to do to her. I’m looking forward to laying down on her ass and giving her a good hard fuck afterwards. My hand shoots out and clamps down on her wrist. She shrieks and laughs. I peel her fingers off the wooden rungs, one by one, and take a seat on the chair. “Bend over my knee, woman.” Wrenching her arm suddenly, she tries to break free from my grip, knocking the can of Crisco off the counter in the struggle. She’s not successful. The can falls to the floor, popping the lid off and propelling a large glop of grease onto the floor. We both laugh at the mess. “You need to clean that up.” Anna orders me. I love our playful battle of wills. “Bend.” I order. “Look at the mess.” “Ignore the mess.” I make a quick grab for her, and Anna yelps and laughs, as I wrestle her over my lap and hold her in place with one hand, as my other cups her ass cheeks through the tight fabric of her skinny jeans. “I can’t believe you’re doing this.” “You’ve never had a hand laid on you, have you?”

“I was a very good girl.” “I don’t think you’re as good as you think you are. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be in this situation.” I raise my palm and let it come down with enough force to give her bottom a stinging sensation. “Ow.” Anna kicks her legs and laughs. God she’s hot. I give her a few spanks through her jeans, feeling my cock become unbearably hard. Her bottom is big and lush, and I want to fuck it. “Take off your jeans.” Anna struggles against me, still laughing and shrieking as we wrestle. I manage to unsnap and unzip her jeans and wrestle them to mid-thigh. Anna kicks her legs, but I have the size and strength advantage, and I use it. “You think I’m an old man?” I bring my palm down with a whooshing sound, making on her bare ass. Anna shrieks again. “OW!” Then laughs. “I can’t believe you. Ow! Oh Ow!” I laugh and give her enough smacks to get her tush nice and red. “I’m going to fuck your ass now.” “You wouldn’t.” “I would. Let’s get messy.” I grab the Crisco and Anna and haul her to her bed, pushing her onto the end of her mattress and using the lard to grease my cock and rim her asshole. Enough grease and I slide my cock into her ass with a smooth gliding motion. She inhales sharply. “Oh my god.” “Nice and tight isn’t it?” She lets me fuck her from behind, as my fingers play with her clit. I ride her firmly and slowly, trying to make it last as her pleasure builds. Anna takes over, using her fingers to stimulate her clit, as I push two fingers into her pussy, while I keep at the slow grind from behind. It’s hard for me to keep to a leisurely pace. Her red, bouncing ass has me so hard I’m going to blow any

second. It’s gripping me so tight. Her moans commingle with mine and send me to the edge of bliss. “I’m cumming.” Her voice emerges as a low satisfied moan. I wait to drive until she finishes and release my cum into her ass, gripping her waist with one hand and the sheets with my other. The pleasure immense, I sink into her.

Chapter 27

Anna Rolling to my side, I blink, yawning, ass sore from the day before. Glancing behind me, I realize that the Tsar must have gotten up. I sit up, dangle my feet, and slide off the bed onto the floor. The wood is cold beneath my bare feet and every walking movement I make is a reminder of the kink we shared. Pulling on jeans and a sweater, I walk into the kitchen, running my fingers through my hair. “My sweet golubchik. How are you this morning?” The Tsar gives me a wide smile and hands me a steaming mug of coffee. “Sore, thanks to you. And what the hell is a golubchik?” I give him a testy look. “It means ‘lovebird.’” He laughs at my displeasure. “I like it when you’re feisty. It brings out the dark side in me.” “I don’t think you need any help in that department.” He kisses my cheek. “Morning. Great ride last night.” I raise my eyebrows and give him a half smile through slatted eyes. “Yep. I feel it. I suppose you’re an expert.” “What do you mean?” “The spanking thing. I bet your parents spanked you a lot when you were a kid. You were in trouble a lot, weren’t you?” As soon as I say the words, I regret it. Of course, he was, he had the scars to prove it. “You think you have me all figured out, don’t you?” “No. I don’t. I’m sorry. I’m half awake. I shouldn’t have said that. It was insensitive of me.” His face moves from playful to serious at my words. “What we did last night was sex play. I would never hurt you. I hope you know that Anna.”

“I know it was play, and I liked it.” I look at him over the edge of my coffee mug. “Does that surprise you?” I cock an eyebrow at him. He meets my provocative look. “I like surprises, and you continually surprise me in good ways. I would be willing to bet though, that your parents never raised a hand to your pretty ass.” “You’d be right. Though I probably deserved it a few times.” I drain my mug and go for more. Adding cream and sugar to my coffee, I study his face, wanting to ask him about his first marriage. I want to know if Marina tricked him. And I want to know more about his fertility struggles. It’s weighing on the back of my mind. “What was your childhood like Anna? What was the worst thing you did as a kid?” “It was pretty white bread stuff, with the occasional neighborhood scandal. My best friend lived down the street, and I spent lot of time with her family. I liked all the action. Probably the worst sneaky thing I ever did was put a worm in Will Bonner’s sandwich after making me kiss him at school in plain sight of the whole schoolyard. I was so mad at being embarrassed in front of my classmates that I found a worm and snuck it into his peanut butter and jelly sandwich at lunch. He ate it, and after I told him, he spewed all over the cafeteria floor. He told on me, but our teacher didn’t believe him, and I got away with it. He never tried to kiss me again.” “I’ll make sure I never kiss you in public against your will.” I laugh. “Wise choice.” “Poor Will, just trying to get a kiss from the most beautiful girl in school, and you broke his heart no doubt.” “Will deserved it, and he’s fine. He went on to date the prom queen and is now married with 3 kids. I saw him a month ago. He stopped in for coffee at my shop.” “No lingering effects from the worm?”

“He asked me if his coffee was safe.” We laugh. “I want to know about you Valentin.” The words spill out of my mouth without much thought and sound way too serious for this early in the morning. But if I don’t ask him now, when? “Are you worried about me not being able to have kids?” “Yes.” I look at him directly. “Valentin, I’m sorry. I know this is painful for you to talk about. But it seems like it’s a really tough thing to deal with when the time comes.” I feel bad about causing him pain. I can tell by the look on his face that it’s an exceedingly difficult thing for him. He turns away from me and looks out the kitchen window. “It is.” He puts his hand on his neck and holds it there. “That must have been really shitty to learn, especially since Marina lied to you when you first got together.” He turns and looks at me sharply. The expression on his face conveys the truth. Tanya was right. Marina had tricked Valentin into marrying her. He crosses his arms. “Vladik told you this?” “Tanya. She said Vladik told her.” “That’s why you’ve been acting differently. Why didn’t you say anything before now?” I raise my brows in his direction. “We seem to have gotten sidetracked from any depth in our conversation. Or did you forget what you did to me yesterday? I should have said it straight away, but I didn’t. The time we have together is slipping away, and I realize that I should try to know the real you, not just the sexy parts.” He nods his head, a pained expression on his face. “It’s true. Marina lied. She wanted to be married, and I didn’t. After we married, she said she miscarried. But the truth came out, when we were told by the doctors, that the reason she couldn’t conceive was because of me. Marina was a lapsed Catholic girl, she

thought God was punishing her for lying. She blamed me too. Which of course was true, but not intentional.” “There’s a lot I don’t know about you.” “We have our lives in front of us. Though, I’m not sure you want to stay and find out.” “That’s not fair. It’s not just up to me to come to you. We live 800 miles apart. I have family and friends and a business. And…” I grip the chair rung for . “And I hate it that you make me want to leave all that to be with you. And it makes me feel crazy inside, and I’m having trouble being logical about it, because this thing between us isn’t logical.” “You mean to you it isn’t. Because you’ll never be able to have a child with me.” “Don’t be a stubborn ass. I was meaning that I’d have to give up a lot or you would. I’m talking distance logistics right now. And I can’t see you moving south to be with me.” “But at the deepest level it’s about having kids isn’t it? You said you love it here.” “It’s a shit thing, yes. And I don’t want to pretend that it might be okay with me because I don’t know. I’m not ready right now, but maybe my clock will start ticking and then… I don’t know.” I throw my hands in the air. Frustrated, uncertain, and hating it that underneath it all I want to go through the fire with him, because. Just because. There isn’t reason to my feelings. “You’re incredibly blunt.” “I happen to think that’s a good thing.” “It is. But I think it means that you don’t want to be with me. And hey, that’s alright. I get that. Anna, I would get another operation for you. I would try, but there’s no guarantees. And Marina hated it. Vladik is right. It’s not fair to you.” He turns away and faces the window again. I hate it that I’m hurting him with my words, but there isn’t much choice except to be real about our situation. “I want to be with you. I want to try to be with

you.” He turns and faces me. “If it’s that difficult for you don’t bother. You’re young. Have a nice life Anna.” He grabs his jacket off the back of the chair and makes for the door. Clearly, I hadn’t thought this conversation through. It’s not going well. And I hadn’t expected him to turn away from me so quickly. Where’s the fight? I sprint to the door and cut him off. As if I’m going to stop him. If he wants to leave, he easily can. I slap my hand on the door and bar his way. “Where the hell are you going?” “Are you trying to stop me?” “Yes. I’m waiting for your caveman to simmer down so we can talk though this.” “Anna I’m trying to protect you. I don’t want to hurt you, and I don’t want you to hate me. It’s why I’m letting you go. I shouldn’t have started things with you. I had this false hope, I guess. Señora Madora told me I’d meet someone, and she described you to a T. When I met you, I didn’t think, at least not with this.” He points to his head. “It was selfish and stupid of me. I should have told you about my situation, but things between us went a lot further and faster than I ever thought possible.” “Look. You don’t need to protect me. And I could never hate you. Don’t let me go Valentin.” “I need to think Anna. I have to go to work, and I need to think about this.” I move my hand away from the door and step aside. I watch as he heads into the frosty air. Bereft and alone, I watch as he drives off.

Chapter 28

Valentin I drive down the hill towards the factory in one of the worst moods of my life. Bad memories with my father, Vladik, and Marina plague my thoughts. I the spot where Anna tripped on the road and pull over. The skies are grey and gloomy, matching my mood. Why did I ever think that this would work out? She’s 24 for god’s sake. I’m 37. It’s a big gap. The sex? So hot though. And there’s Señora Madora’s predictions. Not that they matter now. I’d been stupid to believe them. Anna was right, Señora Madora was a keen observer, and maybe she’d ‘predicted’ things for my own good, to help me gain the motivation to go look for someone. Vladik is right. I must let Anna go. It isn’t fair to her. She has family, friends, a business. I can’t expect her to uproot everything and come live up here. Not to mention, I’m damaged goods. She needs the security of having kids, and I can’t give that to her. Amid my troubled thoughts, my cell rings. It’s Dimitri’s wife, Tatiana. “Valentin.” Her voice sounds like she’s been crying. “What’s wrong?” “It’s Dimitri. I need help with him. He won’t listen to me. He’s drinking heavily and sometimes he es out. Please, I don’t know what to do. Can you come over and see him? I know it’s a lot to ask, but think of your nephews, please.” I release a huge sigh. I can’t go to Russia right now. My own life is in chaos. And Dimitri is stubborn, it’s not like I’m going to be able to convince him to stop drinking. Basically, it’s up to Dimitri to do that for himself. “T. I know you’re having a hard time. I’m sorry, but I can’t come over right now. Let me call Antonin for you and see if he is able to go.” “Valentin. He has young kids. He won’t want to come over here. I have asked him before. You’re a single man, and I thought it would be easier for you to come. Please. I’m asking you.”

“T. You need to pack up the kids and leave him. Stay with your mother. He’s like our father. He’s never going to stop drinking unless he wants to, and he doesn’t want to.” This conversation has been had before, and it’s heart wrenching. She wants my help. She wants me to protect her from Dimitri, my own brother. The brother that’s so much like our father. I hate this. Hate this pattern, this destructive cycle that carries on through the generations. But I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t interfere with my brother’s marriage. Vladik had come between me and Marina, and I’m never going to be that person. The one that offers to be the savior. The one that drives the wedge through the marriage. Dimitri would hate me for it. I would hate myself for it. “You haven’t changed Valentin. You are still the hard-hearted man that you were when you were with Marina.” Tatiana hangs up abruptly, and I sit, forlorn and sad. This day has completely gone to shit, and there’s nothing I can do to change it. Text messages bing on my phone. I’m needed at the factory. I’m about to pull away when a familiar figure walks into view. Still wearing those damned oversized boots. I hit the power button on the window. She strolls directly to me, and my heart literally jumps in my chest. I don’t want to let her go. But I know I need to for her own sake. “I’m just waiting for you to trip.” “Yeah. You’re so funny.” She’s annoyed with me. “Why are you here Anna?” “You know why I’m effing here.” “Southern belle’s got an attitude.” “I’m not a southern belle for one thing. And I came for you. I let you take me in the ass. I deserve more than you running away. You’re scared Valentin. Maybe you’re scared of me rejecting you. But I’m not that shallow. This is not about

simply being able to produce offspring. If we want to be together, we need to get to know each other. We could start with that. You know?” She cocks an eyebrow at me. I’m reminded again that I’ve met my match in this woman. She has fire inside her, and I want to share that fire. I get out of my truck and slam the door. She doesn’t flinch. “You want to get to know me?” “That’s what I said, caveman.” I want to laugh. God she’s a sight and the attitude. “My family is screwed up.” “Everyone’s family is screwed up.” “Mine is more so than others.” She shrugs her shoulders. “My youngest brother will try to sleep with you.” “That is screwed up.” “My oldest brother is an alcoholic.” She crosses her arms in front of her chest, like a petite soldier standing guard. “My biological father is an alcoholic. I haven’t seen him in years. He hit on one of my friends at my sweet 16th birthday party, and I haven’t spoken to him since. I can’t help the hint of a smile that’s starting to crack the corners of my mouth. “That’s pretty bad.” “Yes. It was. He’s messed up. Someday, maybe he’ll get help. I can’t help it that he had me, any more than you can help the fact that you have the family you were given.” My hand reaches for the top edge of my truck bed.

“You’re afraid that I will reject you because you can’t give me kids, but if we don’t work out, it will be because we can’t work it out. It doesn’t just rest with your limitations. Relationships are about two people. We need to know if we’re compatible.” Her words somehow lift some of the bricks that were sitting on my chest. I meet her gaze. “I think we’re pretty compatible.” “Not just in bed.” “You have to start somewhere.” She grins. “Yeah. True.” “We like winter sports.” “You should kiss me.” “You’re bossy.” “You like to be in charge.” “I do. You should kiss me.” “Meet me halfway.” Our words come out at the same time. We take a step towards each other, our breath as clouds, mingling in the air around us.

Chapter 29

Anna It’s the morning of the Tsar’s party. A clear beautiful day exhibits itself, after days of grey skies and snow showers. The sun sparkles off the snowdrifts. I lean back onto the sofa, enjoying my morning coffee and thinking of the past two weeks. Things have happened so fast with the Tsar. Every day we’ve gone on a new adventure, playing around like kids, enjoying the time we’ve had together. Fighting. Making up. Sex. Oh my god sex. Incredible mind-blowing sex. I’m a sex addict, I think, smiling to myself. The Tsar has spent every night at my cabin. I want it and I’m not ashamed of my raging desires anymore. Ok, maybe a little. But he- sex- it’s like a drug. Tonight, will be fun. The red dress is hanging in his closet, tucked away behind some suits. I left it there in my haste to leave, the morning that Vladik had come on to me. At least he has a sex buddy now to distract him. I pause in my thoughts at the realization that I’m exactly that to Valentin. We haven’t made any hard and fast decisions about what we’re going to do with our relationship once I head back home. Pushing the uncomfortable thoughts away, I wonder how the party will be. Tonight, I told Valentin that I might stay over. But I’m going to drive myself to his mansion. Just in case. After all, Valentin had said Antonin was conservative, and what if he disapproves? Vladik certainly wouldn’t. But Antonin has young kids, maybe he and his wife will think I’m immoral, a loose woman. Sleeping with a man I’ve only known for 2 weeks might qualify for that judgement by some people. Actually less than 2 weeks. My mother certainly wouldn’t approve of such a quick romance. Wonder what Nana would think? She wouldn’t have judged. I decide. Stretching, I walk to the window and look down the mountain in the direction of the pond. Rushes poke through the snow, but the pond is obscured in snow drifts. A hawk circles lazily overhead or is that a vulture? It’s hard to tell. A knock sounds at the kitchen door. Puzzled as to whom it is, I head for the kitchen door, taking a glance through the window. A man in a brown uniform stands at the door.

“Hello?” “Hi. Are you Ms. Anna Anderson? “I am.” “This is for you.” He hands me a long box. “Thank you.” I take the box to the kitchen table and cut open the sides. Nestled in the box is a huge arrangement of white Dendrobium Orchids and a clear crystal vase. Looking for a card to explain, I search under the flowers. Nothing. Probably from the Tsar. Following the directions given for the flowers, I fill the sink and submerge them. After 15 minutes, I trim the stems and place them in the vase filled with hot water. They look beautiful sitting on the table, like a profusion of white snow flowers clustered above the crystal. There are chores to be done, laundry being first on the list. I stuff my wash bag full of dirty clothes, grab my jacket, and give a lingering glance at the flowers before heading out the door. So beautiful. On the drive to town, I review everything I need to get done before the party. While stopping at a convenience store, I purchase a few items, get directions to the Laundromat, and dial my parent’s home phone. There’s no answer and I leave a message for them. I exchange cash for coins, purchase some detergent and dump my clothing into 2 separate washers. I reach for my untouched vacation novel and sit down to read while I wait. After reading the same paragraph 3 times and not comprehending what I’m reading, I decide to look out the window and ruminate. As usual, my thoughts turn to the Tsar and our intense relationship, wondering what tonight will bring, wondering how it will be when I return to North Carolina. My thoughts are interrupted as my cell jangles its ring tone. The screen indicates the Tsar. “Hello Valentin.” I answer in a seductive voice.

He releases a wolf whistle. “Hello sex kitten.” I laugh. “What’s up?” “Wondering what you’re doing this morning?” “I’m sitting here at the Laundromat, washing my clothes and thinking of you.” “Mmm. What were you thinking about me?” “It’s a secret.” “What’s the secret? Is it a sexual fantasy?” “If I told you it wouldn’t be a secret.” The man unloading the washer next to mine winks at me. Blushing, I turn my back on him and attempt to lower my voice. “I’ll have to extract it later from you.” “How are you going to do that?” “I have my ways. I’m Russian ? Ruthless, cunning, and unable to be deterred when it comes to you. But I’ll give you a clue. It will involve handcuffs and my bed.” I laugh. It’s so easy to do when I’m with him. “Are you ready for tonight?” “There’s not much for me to do since it’s being catered. My brother Antonin should be here midafternoon. Can I pick you up you before then?” “I’ll drive up, and I’ll try to be there around 3. How’s that?” “Sounds good. I want you to stay over tonight Anna. You said you would think about it.” “I have conflicting thoughts on that subject, so we’ll see. Hey, by the way, did you have flowers sent to me this morning or is it my secret irer?” “Your secret and not so secret irer is me. I had the orchids sent, but there should have been a note.”

“I didn’t see a note, but thank you so much, Valentin. They’re really beautiful.” The buzzer on the washer alerts me. “Valentin, I have to go, my clothes just buzzed. See you soon.” “See you soon, Annushka.” My to do list not yet done, I hit Rachel’s number, while I transfer my clothes to the dryer. It rings once, before a chipper female voice answers the phone. “Hello stranger who hasn’t called me in almost 2 weeks.” “Rachel, I’m sorry. I was stuck in a blizzard, and my phone doesn’t get reception up at the cabin. How are you?” “I’m hard at work, and I have news for you. A new sales guy started work last Monday, and he’s super hot. You’ll have to meet him Anna, after I make my moves on him, of course.” I laugh. “Listen, Rach. I was wondering if you could do a quick favor for me.” “Now I know why you called.” “I was wondering if you could google something for me.” “You don’t have Wi-Fi up there?” “My cabin doesn’t even have a phone.” “It sounds very back woods up there.” “Rach. Pretty please?” “Alright Ms. Princess. What?” “I want to know what to bring as a gift for a Russian host.” “A Russian host? You mean a guy? Who is this guy Anna?” “Someone I met.” “I knew it. That’s why I haven’t heard from you. What’s he like? Is he hot?

Did you meet him on the ski slopes? Anna, I want details here. You’ve been holding out on me.” “He’s smoking, and I have to get ready for the party tonight, so I don’t have much time. Can you look for me please?” “I’m looking, I’m looking. There are a lot of listings here. Oh, here’s one. Russian men receive flowers too. That’s a new one. Oh, but don’t give an even number. Got that Anna? An even number means you are going to a funeral or someone has died. Where did you meet this suave Russian dude anyway?” “It’s a long story, and I don’t want to bore you with the details.” “Anna, you did it, didn’t you?” Rachel lowers her voice to a whisper. “What? No, god, you’re at work. I don’t want your coworkers hearing about my love life.” “Oh my god, Anna. My Anna is no longer a virgin!” Her voice rises to a crescendo of triumph. Rachel just announced to her entire office that I’m no longer a virgin. “Rachel, shut it.” A body blush descends over me and I swivel around to see if the man doing his laundry heard my friend. But what does it matter? Everyone in Rachel’s office probably heard. “Sorry, everyone is looking over now. It’s nothing to be ashamed of Anna. Your first sexual encounter.” Her voice holds a note of awe. “I want to know more.” “Rachel, so help me when I get back.” “When are you getting back anyway?” “Another week.” “Take pictures, I want to see this guy. He must be something for you to budge off your ‘I’m done with men’ attitude.” “Rachel. Can you focus here? Any more suggestions?”

“Well… here’s one. Give all the children…Are there children?” “A few, but not his.” “It says give the children an unwrapped gift, otherwise they can’t open it till later.” “Rachel, what do I get the guy?” “What is this guy’s name anyway?” “Rachel, you’re impossible. Valentin if you must know.” “Valentin. That’s different. Sounds like Valentine.” “Focus, please woman. It’s pronounced ‘teen’ not ‘tine’. I don’t have a lot of time. His last name is Tsarev. His friends call him ‘the Tsar’.” “I see. Very Interesting. So you’re dating a Russian mafia hit man.” “Rachel.” I laugh. “Please.” “Okay then, well, the other options I see are pickled herring, caviar, beets, potatoes and Russian vodka.” “Beets and potatoes?” “Uh oh, gotta go, supervisor is heading this way.” Rachel whispers into the phone. “I’m already in trouble for taking too much time for lunch. Call me when I’m not at work. I need details. Bye.” “Bye.” I say into the phone, hearing a man’s deep voice say Rachel’s name in a disapproving tone before the phone clicks to end the conversation. I shake my head. Rachel’s something else. Always a livewire. It will be so good to see her when I get back.

Chapter 30

Anna I look through my freshly laundered clothes carefully, wondering what to wear when I meet Antonin and his family. It’s not like I’d brought a lot of choices. I hadn’t brought dress to impress clothes, that’s for sure. Quickly, I dress, brush my hair out and apply some light makeup, tossing a few essentials into my duffel bag for tonight. Within a half an hour I’m ready and heading for my jeep, deciding to be early. My stomach is doing little flips now. Parked off to the side of the Tsar’s circular drive is a Mercedes-Benz Sprinter Limo. They’re here. I’d been hoping to arrive before they did. Vladik opens the door for me, his smile wide and flirtatious. “Greetings Anna.” “Vladik.” “I’m filling in for Señora Madora.” “You couldn’t fill those shoes.” “I’m hurt.” “Like I believe you.” “I will try to ignore your sour behavior and escort you to the second floor where the rest of this dysfunctional family has congregated.” He offers his arm to me. Ignoring his arm, I reply, “I’ll follow you up.” “Playing hard to get, Anna?” “Vladik, you act like a high school boy.” I say, rolling my eyes at him. “I can prove my manhood to you if you like.” “You’re disgusting. Are you forgetting you have a girlfriend?” “If you’re referring to Tanya, she isn’t my girlfriend.”

“Then maybe you should worry about spreading diseases.” “One would think you might worry about that yourself, seeing as your sleeping with my brother. He’s certainly seen his share of action.” “Stop talking.” We come to the top of the stairs and walk towards the arcade. By now, I’m feeling annoyed at the conversation with Vladik. I walk into the arcade and take in the scene. Antonin’s boys are absorbed in the excitement of the pinball games and the adults are seated at a table talking over drinks. Valentin immediately gets up and comes over to me, planting a kiss on my cheek. Antonin and his wife stand to greet me. The Tsar makes the introductions. “Anna this is my brother Antonin and his wife, Karin.” “Pleased to meet both of you,” I stick out my hand. They greet me with reserve, assessing me. Antonin is the first to speak, “Nice to meet you Anna, we have been hearing a lot about you from my brother.” His accent is slightly more pronounced than the Tsar’s, but there’s a strong similarity between the two men. Both are a similar height, dark haired, and have strong facial features, but Antonin looks older, is paler and sports a goatee. Karin looks younger, with short dark hair and deep brown eyes, an attractive woman with sculpted cheekbones, she could be a high fashion model. Both have a cosmopolitan look to them, dressed in what looks to be expensive designer clothes. I immediately feel out of my league. Antonin calls the children over. “Peter, James. Come here, there’s someone I want you to meet.” The children reluctantly step away from their games, but I notice that Antonin must be the strong disciplinarian type because they don’t complain about the interruption. “Anna, this is my eldest son, Peter and this is James.” Both boys have the dark

hair and eyes like their parents and politely shake my outstretched hand. “Nice to meet you.” I say to both boys, who are trying not to glance back at the games. They look to be about ten and twelve. The boys are dismissed and go back to their play. “Anna would you like a drink?” The Tsar offers. “No thank you, I’m fine.” Standing stiffly, I wonder if and when the awkwardness will wear off. Obviously, they’re much more sophisticated than me, and I wonder if they look down on my jeans and hoodie outfit. A loud, gushy voice breaks the awkward silence. “Vlady, you who, where are you?” I hadn’t thought I would be glad to hear that voice again, but I am. There’s a charming irreverence to it. Tanya is a hundred percent herself. Entering the room, she strides in like a pageant queen, full of confidence and heavily perfumed and made up, nails looking like Cardi B’s. Hair coiffed and sporting extra high heels, a short skirt, and a tight cashmere sweater, she heads excitedly for Vladik, giving him an air kiss with her mauve colored lips. Not waiting for an introduction, she zeroes in on Antonin and Karin. “I’m Tanya. You must be Antonin and this is?” She looks down at his wife. “Tanya, nice to meet you. This is my wife Karin.” Antonin looks at her curiously, like some new exotic creature he’s seeing for the first time at the zoo. “Boys.” He calls. Poor kids ripped away from their fun yet again. I my host gifts. Once the introductions are finished, I reach into my bag and pull out two boxes of maple sugar candy. Extending the candy, I see the shy smiles on their faces. “Just a little something for you both. I didn’t know what to get, but I know kids usually like candy.” “Thanks.” Peter doesn’t look terribly impressed. “Cool, maple leaves,” says James. “Boys,” warn their mother, “not until after dinner.” An annoyed expression

crosses her face. Tanya chuckles at the situation. “You can tell that Anna isn’t a mother.” I flush, feeling annoyed with myself for not thinking about it. “Since it’s a special occasion, I think we could allow them to have two pieces,” says Antonin. I smile at him, thankful that he’s nice about it. Reaching into my duffel, I pull out three bottles of quality Russian vodka, one by one, handing them to Antonin, Vladik, and the Tsar respectively. “I wasn’t sure what to get,” I say, feeling awkward as heck. “I tried looking online, and it was a tossup between the pickled beets and the vodka, so…I hope no one is offended, I wasn’t assuming that you’re into alcohol or drinking,” I pause, feeling the silence, “it could be re-gifted. And it’s for you both too.” I look at Karin and then glance at Tanya. Karin looked annoyed before, but now she looks really pissed. Why is she so ticked? I’m just trying to be nice. This is going to be more difficult than I’d imagined. There’s a pause as everyone looks at me, the Tsar smiling his approval. Suddenly Antonin breaks into a roar of laughter and turns to the Tsar, “I like her. Very nice, thank you.” Tanya nods at me, giving me an okay sign. “Nice.” Nudging Vladik, she whispers furiously under her breath, “Why didn’t tell me of your Russian custom?” I can’t help but hear him as he replies, “We never had this custom, but it could be a custom. I like it.” The afternoon speeds quickly by. The adults talk and watch the kids at the arcade with the adults ing in with some of the games. The competition among the adults contributes to a large amount of laughter, and I realize that despite my worries and Karin’s attitude, I’m enjoying myself. We play rounds of air hockey in teams, and I find the Tsar’s eyes on me often. He’s reveling in this moment. Family obviously brings him great happiness. It’s time to get ready for the party. Karin leads the boys away from the arcade,

telling them that it’s time to shower and dress for the occasion. The butterflies return full force, it’s almost time to meet the people from the Tsar’s business and their families. I mount the stairs leading to the third-floor suite, and Karin catches my eye, looking at me with an expression that resembles distaste. Maybe I don’t seem sophisticated enough for her, I think to myself. Or, maybe she thinks I’m a loose woman. The Tsar s me in his bedroom a few minutes later. “You’re staying over tonight, Annushka?” Approaching me, he draws me to him in a tight embrace. Not wanting to spoil the mood he’s in, I simply say, “We’ll see.” And change the subject. “How many people are coming tonight?” “Around 200.” “That’s a lot. I have to warn you, I’m not great at ing with names, especially when I’m nervous.” “Anna, these are nice people. They’ll like you, just be yourself. You have nothing to worry about.” He kisses the tips of my fingers, like he had the first night I was here in his room. “I can’t wait to see you in that dress.” Half an hour later, we’re both dressed, the Tsar in a black tux and white dress shirt and me in my long sleeveless, satin red dress that conforms to my curves. A slit up the back reveals a lot of leg and the backs of my black, high-heeled pumps. The Tsar whistles at me as I spin around for him. “You look ravishing.” He moves to hold me, running his hands over the glossy material and letting his hands come to rest on my ass cheeks. “I’m looking forward to removing this later on.” He tugs at the glossy straps of my dress. “You look very handsome, and you smell really good.” I say to him. He does. The tux with its broad cut shoulders, shows off his masculine form. I head for the bathroom to put on the finishing touches to my makeup, applying a glossy red lipstick, pouting, and blotting till it comes out alright. I’m not used to wearing such a strong color and notice that it brings out the blue of my eyes.

Adding a hint of blush and running a mascara wand over my eyelashes, I pause to assess myself. Excitement lights my face and makes my eyes look larger. I’m ready to face the crowd. It’ll be interesting to meet the people that the Tsar works with. Upon opening the door, I find myself face to face with the Tsar. He pauses, looking at me intently, as though for the first time, gently taking my hands. Softly, he whispers to me in Russian, “Ti takaya krasivaya.” I smile up at him, “I’m afraid I need an English translation for that.” “It means ‘you are so beautiful’.” “Thank you.” “Anna, the guests are arriving. Are you ready?” “Ready,” I say, taking his arm and heading down the long spiral staircase to the hall. Vladik is at the bottom, in conversation with a large, bearded man, but he glances up at me and gives me a long appreciative glance. The man he was speaking with turns as well, looking up at us. The Tsar moves to greet him and make the introductions. “Anna this is Rick Cadieux.” I shake his hand thinking that his gruff, burly appearance is exactly what I’d expected to see in the Tsar the first time I’d met him. “Pleased to meet your acquaintance Anna.” He calls to his wife, a lovely looking woman with silver hair, dressed in a black floor length gown. Shaking my hand, she greets me kindly. “I’m Doris. I’d introduce you to our kids, but we’ve already lost them to the arcade.” She points towards the second floor. “Perfectly understandable. It’s a lot of fun.” The introductions go on for a half an hour, as guests arrive with their families. I meet them all, a smile permanently affixed to my face. The Tsar’s crew and their families are a friendly bunch. When the introductions are made, the Tsar

invites them to the bar where there’s a spread of white bread and butter, caviar, stuffed mushrooms, pickled herring, and shots of vodka on an enormous silver tray of ice. Classical music plays in the background directed by a fun looking DJ dressed in a red tux. The Tsar takes my hand and leads me to the vodka. Picking up a chilled glass, he urges those around him to do the same, until everyone that wants one, has one. Fruit juice is offered to the kids and adults that don’t wish to drink. Black bow tied caterers circle with trays, ensuring that everyone is offered food and drink. He lifts his shot and gives a toast, “Thank you all for coming. I am incredibly happy to have my family and my friends under one roof, ed in celebration. I hope you enjoy tonight. And I give a special welcome to this beautiful woman by my side, Ms. Anna Anderson, a businesswoman and our new friend and neighbor, who hails from North Carolina. To all of you.” He raises his glass. Everyone else raises their glass in appreciation. More toasting from the Tsar’s employees and brothers follows. People mill about, the conversation quickly becoming louder and more raucous as more shots are downed. The meal is laid out buffet style, a sumptuous spread of thinly sliced, melt in your mouth beef, buttered lemon chicken, boiled and mashed potatoes, string beans with bacon, salad, and freshly baked rolls with butter. Ravenous, I dig into a plate of food, standing as I eat, catching snatches of shop talk from the Tsar and his employees. A comfortable buzz settles over me, and I decide to switch to fruit juice after two shots so that I don’t do or say anything stupid. Wandering into the hall, I head into the large bathroom marked with the figure of a woman. The door’s locked, so I head for the Tsar’s room on the third floor. Mounting the steps, I come to the second floor when I think I hear my name. Pausing, I listen. Out of sight, a conversation is being held about the Tsar. Recognizing Karin’s voice, I stand stock still and listen. “She’s just another one of his whores.” My body goes cold, but I remain, wondering what Karin and Antonin are saying. “She seems like a nice girl. Give her the benefit of the doubt.” “You’ve been asking me to do that for years now. I don’t like the boys being

exposed to these types of women. It’s not a good example for preteen boys.” “Karin, they’re my brothers.” “I don’t care. They need to grow up. Every time we come here there’s someone new. It’s ridiculous.” A flash of anger heats my skin at being judged a whore. This woman doesn’t even know me. “I want you to lay off the booze. No more tonight, please. You promised me.” The stair creaks underfoot, and I quickly climb the rest of the stairs not wanting to be caught eavesdropping. Opening the door to the suite, I go to the window and press my face to the glass, looking out into the dark night. A wave of homesickness washes over me, for the familiar, for the love of my parents and my friends that know me. I swallow, trying to ignore the uncomfortable lump in the back of my throat, as I try to keep the tears from coming. Here I am a stranger. Considered a whore by Valentin’s sister-in-law. Wow. That judgment stings. A fight is going on inside me about whether to stay the night. Yeah, I’d slept with Valentin on the first night I’d met him. Does that make me a whore because I’m having sex with him and staying the night when I’ve only known him for two weeks? Karin obviously thinks so. I look at my jeans and shirt on the closet floor, and my duffel bag on the bed. I could stay at my cabin tonight instead of in the Tsar’s bed. But what would that be for? It would be for appearance’s sake, not for Valentin and not for myself. I walk into the bathroom and glance in the mirror. I square my shoulders, determining inside me to become my own woman. When I decided to sleep with Valentin on the first night, I’d made my choice. I want him. Not just because he’s handsome, but because he’s strong enough to be a challenge, and he knows what he wants. He wants me, and I want him. Yes, I could have waited, and maybe it would have been wiser to wait, but then I would have missed out on the heated ion, lust, and the turning of that into the beginnings of love. I love Valentin. As I glance into my reflection in the mirror, I realize that I know it as an absolute certainty, that I love him and want

to be with him in the future. How the hell that’s going to happen, I’m not yet sure. Maybe we’d have to split our time between states, maybe I’d move up here and visit my parents on the weekends. Or maybe Valentin will move south and start another business. Now that I’ve met him, I can’t undo the brief amazing moments we’ve experienced together, and I want more of that with him. I must try to get over my feelings of shame around Karin and Antonin. It sucks that they probably don’t like me, but somehow, I’ll get over it. Thankfully, there are no further encounters with Karin and Antonin on the way back down the stairs. Reentering the kitchen and bar area, I observe the party in full swing, people engaged in lively conversation, loudly because of the music. There’s a warmth and fullness to this whole party that draws me in, but I feel a little to the outside because I don’t know them yet, and because of Valentin’s family. The Tsar catches my eye when I enter the room and breaks off his conversation to come over to me. “Anna,” he says, his face lighting up. “Where’d you go? I was looking for you.” “Bathroom run.” I smile at him, hiding my conflicted feelings, not wanting to kill the joy he has for his party. “Dessert is served, would you like some?” “Sure.” We head for the dessert, and I pick out a decadent slice of a triple tiered chocolate cake. “Mmm. This is delicious.” Rick approaches the Tsar. “Tsarev ready for a cigar? I managed to procure a few Cubans.” He pats his suit pocket with pleasure. The Tsar looks at me. “Oh, go ahead. Enjoy. I’m going to finish my cake.” He gives me a kiss on the cheek and heads out towards the rear of mansion. A nasally Jersey accent makes me turn. Tanya’s in conversation with one of the wives. They’re talking about the music. “Anna!” Tanya cries out. “There you are. Michelle and I were just going to request that we get a little rock and roll playing. This music they’ve got going on is for old people. It’s too stuffy. We

want to dance.” Michelle nods her head. I , she’s the pretty wife of Case Adkins, one of the younger men in the Tsar’s employ. A curly golden, brown-haired girl, she looks like she’s had a few and is ready to cut loose. Her gown is a trendy, deep purple silk that falls to the floor. “Anna, ask Valentin to change it.” “He just went outside for a smoke. Ask the DJ.” “Come on, let’s go,” says Tanya excitedly, pulling at my arm. Weaving our way through the crowd, we approach the DJ, boldly asking if he’ll play something else. People begin to look over at us, wondering what happened to the music. Never one for dullness, Tanya grabs a shot glass and offers up a toast, “Here’s to rock and roll peeps!” She exclaims, downing the vodka in a single gulp, just as I find a song. Elvis singing “Hound Dog.” “The King! I love Elvis! Anna!” She exclaims. “Let’s dance.” We move to a clear spot, and others began to us. A big group of women, a few men, and a whole lot of kids, do the mash, the twist, and all sorts of derivations, in time with the music. There’s a break in the music with a slow song and I sit down on the edge of a bar stool, moving my head in time with the music. Vladik s Tanya on the makeshift dance floor, and they move slowly to the music. They look good together. Feeling a hand on my shoulder, I turn and look up into the Tsar’s face. “Dance?” He offers me his hand and takes me in his arms. Moving in time to the music, I notice how well he moves, so strong, so graceful. “Having fun?” “I am. Are you?”

“I am, now that I’m holding you.” He leans towards me. “I want you to stay over tonight Anna.” Not wanting to have a confrontation over the issue, I change the subject. “Hope you don’t mind that we changed the music.” “Are you avoiding the subject?” The music switches to a fast song, but he won’t release me. “I want you to stay, Anna.” His eyes are serious, I can tell he’s not in the mood to take no for an answer. “People are starting to stare.” “Let them.” He places his hands on my waist, and possessively slides them over the silky material towards the fullness of my bottom. I grab his hands and move them back to my waist. “Valentin. Please. People are watching.” “Let them watch.” “Your sister-in-law.” “She’s jealous of what we have between us.” “Are you drunk?” “No.” “Glad to hear it. Stop acting like a savage and let me go.” He releases me. “Let’s talk later.” “Tell me yes.” That steely, ruthless look, the one I’d seen on the first night I was here, is on his face. “I’ll say yes to both of you.” Tanya comes up behind us and drapes her arm over the Tsar’s shoulder and mine and winks at me. Clearly, she’s drunk as a skunk. I roll my eyes and catch Karin’s stare of distaste at the 3 of us. “Oh. God.” I

move to get away from drunken Tanya, fun though she is. “Anna, wait.” Valentin calls after me, but Tanya steps in his way. I excuse myself and race towards the bathroom feeling my face flush with shame. The joy I’d felt in dancing drains from me. His family thinks I’m a slut. The look on Karin’s face said it. I enter the woman’s bathroom and splash cold water on my face. My buzz is gone. Reality’s giving me a good hard stare in the face. Karin follows me into the bathroom. We each stand at a sink, checking our appearance. Karin speaks first. “What is that out there? You two share him? Or trade with each other? You know, I don’t know how else to say this, but there are children here, including my children, and I don’t want them seeing this. I don’t want their uncle giving them all that as an example of how to be a man.” My face flushes a deep scarlet as I turn to face her, my heart pounding. “I don’t know what you think you saw, but if you think Tanya and I share Valentin, you must have a pretty scandalous imagination. And if you don’t want your boys to be near Valentin why bring them here? This is his home, not yours.” “You’re just like Marina. You have no idea what Valentin is like, you just want him for his money.” “I make my own money and have no need of his. But one thing I know, Valentin is a family man, and he cares for his brothers, and that in my book is the mark of a good man.” Karin gives me a furious look. “And I’ll still be here when your charm wears off. And it always does with those two. Your appeal will fade, and then he’ll find the next best thing.” Karin gives me a look of disdain and heads for the door, gloating over having the last word. With controlled fury, I give her an angry stare, muttering under my breath. “Don’t count on it, bitch.” Karin wheels around on me. “What did you call me?”

“You know what you are.” “You’re going to regret that. I’m his family. And you. You’re soon to be a nothing to him.” Karin huffs out of the bathroom, and I enter a stall and lean against the wall, feeling angry tears well up in my eyes. I rip a wad of toilet paper off the roll and dab them away, overcome with emotion. Maybe it’s hormones, my period’s due. That’s probably it. I just can’t believe I had this confrontation with Karin. I can’t believe she thinks we’re a threesome. The door opens and closes, and I exhale. Karin has left the bathroom. What a witch with a capital B. Normally I don’t worry about other people’s views on me, why am I so worried about Karin? It isn’t going to stop us from having sex. Karin is not the sex police. Despite the funny thought, I continue to feel the tears fall. I miss Rachel. Rachel would see the humor in this situation and make me laugh. The outer door to the bathroom opens and bangs shut. The lock makes a clicking sound. There’s giggling, intermingled with the lower voice of a man. Tanya and Vladik. Obviously drunk. Peeking through the crack in the stall, I see them, he has her pressed against the wall, and is pulling her sweater off her breasts. I dart back, hiding behind the wall. What the hell? My mind races. Should I yell or just pretend to be oblivious? Tanya’s gushing about how sexy Vladik is. Chancing another look, I peek out. Maybe they’ll just kiss and move away. Fat chance. He’s wasting no time. His pants drop to his knees, his bare ass pumping away as Tanya grips the wall. I squeeze my eyes shut and plug my ears. This family is so nuts. Trying not to hear, I crouch down against the back wall. The moaning gets louder and louder, followed by the sound of rhythmic thumping from the wall. The pace increases, he’s banging her hard. “Vlady,” she moans at him. The thumping hits a fevered pitch, and then subsides. It grows quiet, and I unplug my ears. Peeking out, I see them dressing. Hoping they won’t linger, but I hold my breath. Vladik buttons his shirt as he exits the bathroom, and I briefly hear Valentin’s voice and Karin’s as the door opens. Tanya heads for an adjacent stall. Damn!

The sound of Tanya retching begins. Quickly and quietly, I tip toe to the mirror, doing a check to make sure my mascara hasn’t run before I leave. It has. I look down to turn on the sink, wetting a paper towel. Glancing back up in the mirror, my heart jumps in shock. The Tsar stands behind me, staring at my face in the mirror with an unfathomable expression.

Chapter 31

Valentin “If you’re looking for Anna, she’s in the bathroom with your brother.” Karin points to the women’s room. “I just saw Vladik leave, buttoning his shirt. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but I think they were having sex in there. And maybe you don’t care. It’s none of my business, but I thought you’d want to know.” Karin gives me an apologetic look, but it makes no difference. My blood is already boiling. If Vladik has so much as touched her, I’ll kill him. I stride to the women’s room and barge in. Anna is at the sink fixing her makeup. I walk over to her and stand behind her, my dark eyes piercing a hole through her. “What the hell was my brother doing in here, Anna? I want the truth. Goddamn it. Did you and he…?” She whirls around, facing me angrily, her face burning red. “Is that what you think of me? That I’m some goddamn whore? I guess you don’t know me half as well as you think you do, if you honestly think I would fuck your brother.” Tears stream down her cheeks, and she pushes them away angrily. “I’m not going to stay here and listen to this. Goodbye Valentin.” The toilet flushes. Anna rushes for the door and is stopped short by Antonin. “Valentin.” The expression on his face conveys something terrible, and at first, I think it’s because of us fighting in the bathroom. I prop a hand on the wall, trying to gain some sense of self control, realizing that I’ve been acting like a complete idiot. “I know. We’re loud. It’s upsetting the guests.” “No, man. It’s Dimitri. He was in an accident. Tatiana just called. I could hardly understand her. But one of the boys was in the car with him. They’re not doing well Valentin. I’m flying out now. I don’t know if they will live.” His face contorts with emotion. The blood drains from my face. It’s my fault. It’s my fucking fault. I could have done more, and I didn’t. And now maybe it’s too late. “We have to go Valentin. There’s a flight out of Montreal. We must go now.

Grab a bag. There’s no time.” “Anna.” I plead with her. “Come with me.” “She can’t. I already got a flight for the 3 of us. That’s all I could get on short notice.” Antonin looks apologetic. “I’m coming.” My feet carry me towards Anna. I want to take her in my arms, but I can tell that she’s had enough of me. She looks drained and sad. “I’m sorry Anna. I need go. I didn’t want it to be this way.” She holds up a hand. “Just go.” I try to touch her, but she brushes me away, and I can’t blame her. I’ve just acted like a complete asshole, and I have no one to blame but myself. “I want to see you when I get back.” She looks at me, her face a sad mess, and I wonder if she will even allow me to see her after all this. “Valentin. Let’s go. Goodbye Anna. It was nice to meet you.” Antonin looks apologetic. The three of us leave the bathroom amidst stares of guests, and I break for the stairs. “Anna. Come upstairs. Talk while I pack.” “No. Just go. Your brother is waiting for you.” Anna turns away from me, and I have no choice but to lunge for the stairs and grab my bag. Señora Madora is in my room, finishing my packing. Anna’s duffel bag is on the bed, but she isn’t coming up to be with me. It’s like a sign. A sign that this is the end. And there’s no one to blame but myself. Señora Madora is like a mother to me, gentle and calming. “I’m sorry about your brother. It’s not your fault. that Valentin. Dimitri made his own choices.” I nod at her and peck her cheek. “It’s Anna I’m worried about. I think she hates me. I was a dick to her.” Señora Madora shakes her head. “I’ve seen how she looks at you. She’s the one,

you know. I told you all this, but you don’t believe.” She points at my head. “You’re stubborn up here. Now go.” I run down the stairs, make hasty apologies to my confused guests, and look for Anna in the crowd. She’s nowhere to be found. “Valentin.” Antonin stands waiting at the door. “We have to go now. I don’t want to miss our flight.” I have no choice but to go. Antonin and Vladik get in the truck with me. I strap into the driver’s seat and roar off into the dark night, my heart feeling like it’s been ripped in two.

Chapter 32

Anna I grab my coat and trot to my jeep, shivering in the cold. Halfway there, I realize that my jeep keys are in my duffel bag in the Tsar’s bedroom, and wheel back around towards the house. Valentin is saying goodbyes to his guests, and while his back is turned, I head for the staircase. The Tsar’s bedroom is dark and empty feeling. I stand here for a moment and look around, wondering if I’ll ever step foot in this place again. The place where I’ve experienced the most exquisite ion of my life with the most exciting man I’ve ever met. I’ve no idea. Tonight, he’d been a dick. Mindlessly, I drive home, sitting in shock in the driveway, until the cold pours in around me, making me head inside the cabin in a hurry. These heels are starting to kill me. I wrench them off my feet and fling them towards the doorway. They hit the floor with a resounding thud. The beautiful tub with the lovely skylight view does nothing to ease my anger. Why did Valentin not believe me? How could he think I would ever do something like that to him? But he’d warned me that his family was screwed up. He’d told me the truth about Marina, so little wonder that trust was an issue for him. The emotion of the evening rips through me like a tidal wave. I wasn’t accepted into the family, at least not by Antonin’s wife. And if I’m honest with myself, this quickie relationship probably wouldn’t be accepted by my mother either, though, she’d never treat anyone like Karin treated me, like less than the dirt on her shoe. At least my mother will never know. I realize, as I towel off, that my Nana wasn’t conventional either, and I take after her, and it’s ok not to be. I must create the life that’s right for me. There’s nothing left to do but pack for North Carolina. Every place in this cabin is filled with memories of the Tsar, and I’m not up for staying and reliving it all without him. I pack my bags, throw sheets over the furniture, and collapse in an exhausted heap on the bed. The sun streaming across my face wakens me, and I blink, dazed. Somehow, I make it to the kitchen and fix myself coffee. The memories of the previous

evening ramble through my brain, but I have no desire to relive the bad moments with the Tsar and his family. At least I’m not hungover. That would’ve made everything worse. A car rumbles into the driveway. It’s a bit early on a Saturday morning for visitors. A woman emerges wearing a scarf and sunglasses and a long red wool overcoat, she approaches the door. I open it before she can knock. “Señora Madora.” I say, surprised. “Anna, may I come in?” “Of course. Any word on Dimitri and his son?” Señora Madora grips my hand in a gesture of kindness. “Nothing new that I can tell you, but Valentin called and left a message for you.” She glances around the kitchen at the various bags and boxes. “You are leaving?” “Yes. I’m heading back to North Carolina this morning.” “Their flight left, and he won’t be able to get a call through for at least 24 hours.” She hands me a slip of paper with the airline and flight times. It won’t arrive in St. Petersburg until 2:30 pm Sunday afternoon. “Thank you Señora Madora. I appreciate you coming over. I don’t have your cooking skills, but I’d be happy to serve you cereal and coffee.” “I’m okay. You’re in the middle of leaving.” Señora Madora squeezes my hand, “Take care of yourself Anna. Drive safely. I hope to see you again soon.” She gives me a concerned look. It seems as though Señora Madora wants to say more, but she refrains, and I’m not in the mood to talk about the party. The door closes, and I return to the coffee pot for a refill, thinking about the Tsar’s brother and his son. It’s horrible. Suddenly Karin’s bitchy remarks and the Tsar’s jealous tirade don’t seem to matter so much anymore, not with the lives of a child and his father hanging in the balance. Packing up my things, I load them into the jeep, making sure I turn the furnace down but not off, and giving everything a final check. Emptying nearly all the water from the crystal vase, I wrap a towel around it and pack the white orchids

onto the enger front floor. After completing my tasks, I get into my jeep and head down the mountain The snow sparkles a blinding radiance, and I reach for my sunglasses to reduce the glare. I drive in silence, not wanting to bother with the radio, feeling a great sense of sadness and loss. It will be strange to return home and have everything go back to normal. Only it won’t be normal, for as mad as I felt last night, my feelings for the Tsar run deep.

Chapter 33

Anna Bone weary, I arrive at my apartment building at 2 a.m. the next day. Unloading the essentials, I kick off my boots, jump in the shower and get into fresh pjs. It’s strange to be in my own bed, but the feeling doesn’t last for long, I’m soon fast asleep. The sound of rain hitting the windowpane welcomes me to a disoriented awakening. It takes a few seconds for it to where I am. There’s the familiar, giant painting of a field of red poppies I did last fall hanging on the opposite wall. And my antique dresser and bed, made of cherry wood, a soft white rug on the floor, assorted plants filling the wide sill of the bay window all make me feel at home. Unfortunately, there’s another feeling overriding that. The Tsar, our unresolved issues. Plain and simple, I miss him. How can one person worm their way into your heart in a few short weeks? I ponder it, wondering if we have a future together. And I miss the snow. It’s a bit of a culture shock to find myself back here. There’s no snow and spring is well on its way. It’s noon. Normally energetic, I slowly get out of bed, head into the kitchen, and turn on my coffee maker, an expensive stainless-steel item my parents gave me as a housewarming gift. It makes individual cups, keeping the beans and water in separate holding areas. There’s a racket as it grinds the beans. While I wait for the coffee to brew, I check my phone, dismayed when I realize the battery’s dead. Rummaging in my bag, I find the charger and plug it in, checking for messages. There are three. My mother left a message Friday that I’d missed and Saturday, asking me to call her back. This morning the message is from Valentin. It’s short and somewhat garbled. “Anna this is Valentin. I am hoping you get this message. We have just landed in St. Petersburg and will be heading directly to the hospital to see my brother. I am sorry about last night. It is not how I wanted things to end. I will try to …” The rest of the message is too filled with static to be understandable. I close my phone and boot up my laptop. The screen lights up, and I google the time difference between Durham and St. Petersburg. Eight hours. It would be 8:15 p.m. over there. Despite my qualms, I dial the Tsar’s number, hoping I’m not

calling him at a bad time. It rings and rings, no answer, and no voicemail option with which to leave a message. I try my parents’ number. My mom answers and is ecstatic to learn I’m back, promptly inviting me to dinner. Next, I text Rachel and get an enthusiastic response. I dress and head for Rachel’s apartment. She greets me with an enthusiastic hug. “Anna!” She exclaims. “Rachel.” I’m more subdued but give her a hug and a smile. “Come on in, girlfriend. I want all the juicy details!” We sit at her kitchen table, talking over some type of green smoothie concoction that Rachel blended. I take a sip and give Rachel a thumb’s up sign. “Sooo. Anna. I want to know all about your trip.” “You should see it up North. It’s so beautiful. And still winter there.” “And the guy-what does he do and where did you meet him?” “He owns his own logging company, and I met him kind of by accident really. He lives on the mountain above me. The Bennett’s were friends of Nana and they asked him to check on me, they were worried about me being alone in the blizzard.” “And he did huh?” Rachel teases me. “He did. I was definitely surprised when I answered the door in my towel.” Rachel laughs and claps her hands together, “Oh my god, just like the movies. And what does this Tsar look like?” “He’s a head taller than me, dark hair, handsome, a Russian immigrant, so he has a slight accent.” Rachel looks at me with a smile. “Accents are very sexy.” She raises her eyebrows at me. “You did it with this mountain man didn’t you?”

I blush. “You did. I was right.” Rachel laughs, pleased. “Was it good?” “Rachel, stop.” “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” “I’m not.” “You’re in love, aren’t you?” “Why would you say that?” “I can tell by the way your face lights up when you talk about him. Are you going to see him again?” A fleeting expression of sadness crosses my face. “I don’t know. The last time I saw him, we had a fight and then his brother that lives in Russia was in a serious car accident with his two boys and he left, so we didn’t get to straighten it out. I was going to stay 3 weeks, but after the fight and then after the news I decided to come home.” I explain the weird situation with Vladik and Karin’s comments. “My word Anna, you were in an entire soap opera while you were gone. All I can say is that the sister-in-law sounds like a snob. She is probably insecure. You can’t let her determine your relationship.” “True. But this relationship is doomed anyhow. We live too far apart to date; 16 hours is a heck of a drive. And we both have our own businesses. It’s not like we can just pull up our roots and leave that easily.” “If it’s love, you’ll work something out Anna.” “We had less than 2 weeks though. I don’t know. It’s such a short time.” “My grandparents dated 1 week and got hitched, and they’ve been married for 50 years.” “Are you serious? I didn’t know that.”

“She was underage, so they faked her age and went across state lines to get married. Awesome if you ask me. It means they had ion for each other. Unlike today, people are so cautious, afraid to take the next step.” “I’m surprised Rachel, you sound like a romantic.” “I’m a closet romantic. The problem is finding a guy around here that is like that too.” “I hear you.” “How old is this guy anyway?” “37.” “Divorced?” “Widowed. Sad story, his wife died of breast cancer.” “That is sad. It seems like it’s becoming more and more common. I think there are just too many chemicals floating around.” “Probably.” “Did you tell your parents yet?” “No. I’m going over there next. I’m not sure what I’m going to say. Anyway, enough about me. How is the new office guy?” “Gay. I should have known Anna.” We both laugh.

Chapter 34

Anna The week drags slowly for me. Trying to get through to Valentin proves unsuccessful. He’s probably terribly busy with his family. He hasn’t attempted to call me again or if he has, it isn’t coming through. I’ve tried to think positively about the situation, but I feel the void of him. I miss him intensely. It’s strange to be back at work, almost like the past 2 weeks never happened. Tim inquires of my trip, but I only give him a brief overview. I don’t want to say anything about the Tsar, it feels too personal. Worry hangs in the back of my mind. Tuesday is my first day back, and I’m already a day late. Unusual for me, since my period comes like clockwork every 28 days. And I’m tired. Chalking it up to stress, I push it out of my mind. By Friday evening, I decide to buy a pregnancy test if my period doesn’t arrive by tomorrow morning. Saturday morning comes and no signs of my period. I check my phone, still no message from Valentin. I attempt to call him, but it rings and rings and never goes to voicemail. I tell myself I’m crazy for even thinking it’s possible to be pregnant. Logically speaking, it makes no sense. But I need to rule it out anyway. I drive to the local drugstore. After reassuring myself that I don’t recognize any of the cars in the parking lot, I walk in, filling a basket with odds and ends to disguise the fact that I’m buying a pregnancy test. With butterflies in my stomach, I walk down the aisle with the tests. God, why does there have to be so many choices? After careful consideration, I hide them under the rest of the items in my basket and make a beeline for the . “Anna!” I whirl around, my heart skipping a beat. Tim’s wife, Mia, greets me with a big smile. Their baby girl, Chloe, sits on Mia’s hip looking adorable in a little hat with kitty ears. A bright red flush travels from the top of my head all the way to my feet. This is uncomfortable. “Mia, nice to see you. Chloe looks so cute. How are you?”

“Thanks. I’m good. Just out for a diaper run. What about you?” “You know. Tissues. Little things.” “How was your trip to Vermont?” My face flushes a deeper shade of crimson at the question, and I move my hand protectively over the items in my basket. We make small talk, and finally, Mia heads to the back of the store for diapers. With clammy hands, I unload my items, hoping that Mia doesn’t end up behind me in line, and wondering if the cashier notices that I’m not wearing a wedding ring. Hearing a cry directly behind me, I glance back out of the corner of my eye. Damn. Mia is right behind me. As if it will help the situation, I silently plead to the cashier to hurry it up. Obviously, the cashier isn’t clueing in on my thoughts. She picks up the pregnancy test, and slowly looks it over for the price. I break out in a sweat. I give Mia a nervous smile. Mia gives me a curious glance, bouncing the baby, to get her to stop crying. “Do you know the price on this item?” The cashier brandishes the test. “It’s probably under the sticker.” Someone covered the bar code with a sticker. I kick myself for not paying closer attention to this fact. With cheeks flaming red, I mumble that I hadn’t noticed the price, as I attempt to uncover it with my fingernail. The cashier picks up the phone, announcing that she needs a price check for the Clear Blue Easy Digital Pregnancy Test. If Mia hasn’t figured out what the box is by now, she certainly will, after the lady gets off the phone, including the price. The baby’s still crying when I leave the store, after giving Mia a quick goodbye. An hour later, I grip the edge of the tub as I review the results of the test. Heart pounding, I look at the little window, and read the result. My heart stops. Pregnant.

The word spelled loud and clear. I leave the test on the sink counter and go into my room and collapse on my bed in shock. The Tsar said he was sterile. I was using an IUD, how is this possible? Even Rachel won’t believe this one. Maybe it’s wrong, maybe it’s a false positive. I’ll try tomorrow morning. My thoughts are in chaos for the rest of the day. I sleep restlessly, and the next morning I pad into the bathroom and perform the same procedure with a different test. I sit on the edge of the tub. There’s no waiting, the result is the same. Pregnant. OMG. My heart skips a beat. What are the odds of this happening? I lie on my bed, put an arm over my forehead, and look up at the ceiling. He isn’t sterile. My IUD failed. I’d done my monthly check before I left for Vermont, it was intact. Well, this is unexpected. First, I was worried that we wouldn’t be able to have biological kids together if we ended up as a couple, now I’m worrying about having a baby and not being prepared and everyone knowing what I’ve done. The hardest thing about it is going to be telling everyone. They’ll know I rushed into a relationship. They’ll know I had sex, basically a one-night stand followed by a series of sexual encounters with a person I barely know, a man who I’ve fantasized spending the rest of my life with, despite the fact that there isn’t logic to my impulsive decision making. It just feels right. Amid my cascading thoughts, I laugh at myself. The worrying needs to stop. This event happens every day in the world, I’m nothing special, and I need to get it together. I put my hands on my belly. Growing inside me is part of me and part of the Tsar. The thought is amazing and terrifying all rolled into one. How will he react? Is he having second thoughts? Is that why I haven’t heard from him in over a week? My parents invited me for lunch, and at noon I head over, breathing in the smell of my mother’s home cooking as I walk in the door of their two-story, white colonial. Mom greets me at the door warmly. “Anna. How are you dear? How was your first week back?”

“It was okay.” She takes a step back and looks me over. “You look different.” “Mom. Nothing has changed about me.” I brush her aside, afraid that she’ll discover my secret somehow. My stepdad is reading the paper when I walk into the sunlight kitchen. “Hi James.” “Anna.” He gets up to give me a hug. The meal is delicious, but I’m not very talkative and my mother casts worried glances in my direction. “Are you feeling alright dear?” “I’m fine Mom. Just a little tired lately, that’s all.” “Are you taking vitamins?” “Everyday Mom.” I leave out the part where I went back to the drugstore to get a third pregnancy test and a pack of prenatal vitamins. She doesn’t need to know. My Mother changes the subject, smiling brightly at a sudden thought. “Anna, I was wondering if you could come over for dinner this Friday evening. Do you my friend Betty Carmichael, one of the women I used to play bridge with? I ran into her at the hospital last week, her husband was in for some tests. Anyway, we got to talking about our kids, and she told me that her son has just graduated from medical school, and he’s come back to the area. We think the two of you might make a good match. I took the liberty of inviting them to dinner Friday evening. What do you say?” “Mom. No. No thanks.” “Anna, you’re 24. Men like this don’t come along every day. You should think about your future. Don’t you want to have children?” “Mom! I haven’t even met the guy, and you’re talking about kids?”

My stepfather raises his eyebrows at my mother. “Janice.” “James, I’m thinking of her future. He’s very handsome Anna. I saw a picture of him.” “Mom. No thanks.” “I already made the plans Anna.” “Mom!” Feeling exasperated, I don’t stop to think. “I met someone okay?” My parents look first at me and then at each other in shock. My Mother is the first to speak, “Who is he?” “His name is Valentin Tsarev. I met him in Vermont.” “He’s Russian?” “Mom. What does that mean? What does it matter?” “What are his political leanings? Is he a communist? That’s what your mother wants to know.” My stepfather replies, winking at me over his bifocals. “James.” “Well, isn’t that what you wanted to know?” “I want to know everything.” “Hear that, Anna? She wants it all.” I leave my parents as quickly as possible after my mother drills me with 150 questions about the Tsar. I’m not sure whether they’re happy or dismayed by the news. I think my mother was hoping that I would end up with the doctor. Evening comes quickly, and I find myself back home in my cozy apartment, sipping tea and looking out the bay window of my room. Another call to the Tsar fails, no answer yet again. All I get when I dial is a weird chirping sound. Despair fills my heart over the situation and tears trickle down my face. Maybe it’s over. Maybe he’s avoiding me. Maybe it’s chirping because he changed his cell number.

I drift off into a restless sleep. Sunday morning matches my mood, it’s cold and raining. I cook myself an egg for breakfast but push it away after 2 bites, feeling nauseous. My mood is dismal as I head to the coffee shop. The smell of coffee beans hits my nostrils as I enter, inducing overwhelming nausea. I sprint for the bathroom, and retch over the toilet. I have no choice but to call Tim and ask him to fill in. He arrives within 10 minutes and gives me a concerned look. “Anna are you okay?” “I must have the flu. Sorry.” He looks like he wants to say more, but then seems to think better of it and wishes me well. The rain comes down in torrents on the drive home and my tears fall with it. Tired and ill, I mount the steps to my second-floor apartment, stopping in surprise before I reach the door. Standing in front of my door, back to me, is a tall, dark haired man, wearing a trench coat. He turns around to face me, and I swear I stop breathing for a second. Valentin. His face lights up upon seeing me, and he walks towards me, wrapping me in a strong embrace. “Anna. Anna. I have missed you so much.” He nuzzles his lips against the top of my head and attempts to kiss me.

Chapter 35

Valentin “Why didn’t you call me?” “Anna I’m sorry. I couldn’t get through to you. I tried every day. Several times a day.” I note the distressed look on her face and feel bad for the pain I’ve put her through. Being apart from her for over a week made me feel crazy without her. I want her in my life, and I’m prepared to buy a house here and begin a new business to show her I’m serious. I can’t believe I’m this crazy about her that I’m thinking of businesses I can start here, just so I can date her. In fact, I’ve been making calls about it already, but I’m not going to tell her that yet, I don’t want to scare her. She unlocks the door, and I walk in with her to the kitchen. “How is your brother and his son?” “They’re going to make it. It’s going to be a long recovery for them, but they’re going to be ok. It was very scary at first, we weren’t sure.” I thought to what I could have lost. Marina’s death made me realize that life is too short to fool around. And the accident made it more pressing to me to be with the people I love, especially this beautiful woman standing in front of me. She isn’t happy, I can see that. Something is bothering her. Is she having second thoughts about me? Is that it? “I’m so sorry. What a terrible thing to have happen.” “It was.” I move towards her to take her in my arms, but she pushes away from me. “I’ll be right back.” She puts a hand over her mouth. “My stomach is a little upset.” I take stock of her apartment while I wait for her to return. It’s beautifully and artistically decorated, the orchids I sent her displayed on the table. This seems like a good sign. “Are you okay?” “I’ll be fine.” She waves a hand at me.

“You kept these.” Anna sinks into a chair before she answers. She looks a little pale. “I did. They’re beautiful. Thank you.” I note her subdued look and pull up a seat beside her. I wonder if she’s still angry over the night of the party. I need to make it right. “First, I want to make sure that we are straightened out about the last time we saw each other. Anna, I’m sorry for my behavior, and for that of my family. There’s no excuse.” “I forgive you. I was furious with you at that moment. It’s why I couldn’t say goodbye to you.” “You hid from me.” She nods. “Before you came in and accused me, Karin and I had a confrontation and then Vladik and Tanya had sex in the bathroom. Not with me. But I got stuck in there, and it wasn’t my fault. They were drunk, and I closed my ears. I was so angry with your family and with you. But I’ve had time to think about it and realize that given your history with Vladik and Marina that it’s a trigger for you, and I understand. I don’t like it that you didn’t give me the benefit of the doubt though.” “Karin told me that she’d seen you and Vladik in the bathroom together. It’s why I was so pissed. I should have slowed down. I’m sorry.” I feel like an idiot. “She lied.” “I know. Vladik told me what happened. I wish I hadn’t reacted that way.” She nods. “Me too, Valentin.” “Are you upset that we jumped into sleeping together so soon?” “I like your directness, Valentin.” Her light eyes shoot fire. I love it when I see the flame inside her. She gives me a sharp, pointed look. “No. I have no regrets, but you might.” I shake my head. “Absolutely not. I don’t regret a thing.” I touch her fingers. “I really missed you.”

“I missed you too, I wasn’t sure I would see you again.” She retracts her fingers from mine and something inside me tightens. She’s hiding something from me. Maybe she wants to end things between us. “Would you like something to drink?” She stands, gripping the back of her chair, her face pale. “Coffee’s great. I’m kind of tired from the trip. But I can make it. Are you feeling alright Anna?” “I’ll get it.” Anna moves to the coffee maker and switches it on. Loud grinding ensues, and she raises her voice over the din. “I’m really tired, but I’m okay. How’d you get here?” “I flew from Russia, my love.” “You flew straight here? You haven’t been home yet?” “I haven’t. Rick is taking care of things in my absence.” I’d not been able to rest with the thought of being so far apart and leaving each other the way we had. The smell of the brewing coffee fills the room. With shaky hands she offers me a cup of coffee and turns to the fridge to retrieve the creamer. I stand up behind her, concerned, her face even paler than a moment ago, her temple breaking out in a sheen of sweat. “Anna, what’s wrong?” Bolting for the bathroom, she calls over her shoulder, “I’ll be right back.” Several minutes later she returns, looking paler than ever. Avoiding my gaze, she takes a seat and turns her attention to the vase of orchids. “You didn’t tell me what these symbolize, if anything.” She says, stroking one of the soft petals. “You’re sick.” “Not the contagious kind.” My gaze meets hers, as I catch the meaning of her words. My heart does an uncomfortable flop in my chest, threatening to split in two. I can’t believe this. I

thought I could trust my judgement on this woman. Her next words floor me to my core. “Valentin, I’m pregnant, and I want to keep the baby.” I steady myself with the back of the chair. I’m going to be sick myself. “Of course.” I don’t want to ask, but I need to know. “Who’s the father?” “Are you kidding me right now?” I know pregnant women have a lot of hormones coursing around their veins, but I’ve never seen a woman react like this. With pure unadulterated rage. “Valentin, if this was not my favorite mug, it would be launched at your head right now.” She revs up the speed and volume of her voice, looking as if she’s about to cry. “I have only slept with one man in my entire life, and I’m looking at him. You do the math.” I sink into the chair, my heart beating an irregular rhythm. It feels like someone just punched me in the chest. From the expression in her eyes and the way she’s eying me, like a tigress about to pounce, I know with absolute certainty that she’s telling me the truth. How can this be? I want to take her in my arms, but decide I better give her a little space. Clearly, she’s feeling emotionally charged. “You don’t have to do anything. I can raise the baby myself.” I need to stop her, make her see how much I want her. I want to believe she’s pregnant with my child, but I don’t know how this can be true. “Are you sure you’re pregnant?” “I’ve taken three pregnancy tests. One yesterday and two today. They all came out positive. Do you want a paternity test too?” “Anna. Please, don’t be pissed with me. I told you that the doctors confirmed that I was sterile. You told me you had an IUD.” Her gaze softens a little. “Obviously, your doctors were wrong. And my birth control failed.” Taking her hands, I get down on one knee to look up into her haunted

eyes. “Anna, you’re carrying my child.” I whisper. How is this possible? I feel weak and insanely happy all at once. And yet it seems like too much to hope that she’s carrying my baby. My Baby. It’s my baby. I want to stand up and yell it to the world. Tears fall silently down her cheeks as she nods. “How is this possible?” Was this some bizarre mistake? Is the universe testing me again? And is she having second thoughts about being with me? Is she disappointed? Because I sure as hell am not. “Happens every day.” Anna shoots me a sarcastic glance. Our eyes meet and hold each other, hers a bit feisty. Mine? Completely awed. I place a hand gently on her belly. “You’re carrying my baby.” The thought makes me want to make love to her. I need her in my life. I want her in my life. I want to make her my wife. I sit down and pull her to me, stroking her hair as she cries, “Annushka. Why are you crying? This is wonderful news. You cannot have made me happier.” “I’m overwhelmed Valentin. I wasn’t expecting to get pregnant now. I want kids, but I thought I would be married. I haven’t been able to get ahold of you, and I didn’t know if I would hear from you again.” “Annushka.” I whisper in her ear. “I’m so sorry. I’m here now, and I’m never leaving you again.” I hug her to myself, wrapping my arms around her in a colossal hug. I never want to let her go, hopefully she feels the same way. Tears continue to stream out of her eyes, and I brush my fingers gently against her cheek. “I’m sorry you’re sad.” “I’m not sad. I’m happy.” Anna gives me a half smile through her tears. “My hormones are surging. I’m not usually a mess like this.” “Anna, I want to marry you.” Anna starts laughing and crying anew at the same time. “I’m not crazy. I swear. I’m just…I can’t believe all this is happening at once.” She stops herself and

looks directly into my eyes and cups my face with her hands. “This isn’t usually like me Valentin. I don’t usually rush into things, but with you I feel differently. I feel like I want to marry you too.” My heart skips a beat, and I close my eyes and grip her and the baby she’s carrying, my baby. Gratitude is my overwhelming emotion. I can’t speak. Emotion’s welling up inside me that I didn’t know was there. We’re having a baby together. We’re going to be a family. She’s going to be my wife. She nestles against me, and we stay that way for a while, happy to be together in love, a baby on the way. “You didn’t tell me what the white orchids mean?” “Chinese symbol for many children.” I give her a devious smile. “What?” She exclaims in mock outrage, punching me on the arm. We laugh. We have a lot to figure out. But we will do it. Together.

Chapter 36

Valentin

3 years later Delicious smells emanate from the kitchen, and I smile broadly at Anna’s mother, Janice and Señora Madora who have gone all out for Easter dinner. I don’t know how I got so lucky to have all these beautiful women in my life, but I count my blessings every day. The pair of them look thick as thieves as they fuss over the food. Both are in high spirits, and I think perhaps an ingestion of a fair number of cocktails have been involved in the preparation of the meal. Señora Madora hands Janice a Lavender Tom Collins, and the two of them clink glasses in a friendly way, and then the pair face me as I grab a tray with a sippy cup for my daughter, and a cocktail for me and Anna. I can tell by their expressions that they have something up their sleeves. “Valentin, you know I am beyond grateful to you for giving me a grandchild.” “And I am grateful to have a goddaughter.” Señora Madora adds. “Señora Madora.” Janice turns to her compatriot. “Call me Mimi.” “Mimi told me a little back story on my granddaughter.” I flash Señora Madora a stern glance. “What have you been telling her?” The expression on Señora Madora’s face indicates that she told pretty much everything. “Mimi has gifts and I have friends that will pay for that type of skill. We’re having a party. Soon. But, there are questions we have about yours and Anna’s future.” My eyebrows lift. “Yes?” “We were wondering if there will be any more little additions to the family anytime soon.

“Babies.” Pipes in Señora Madora. There’s a knock at the door. “I’ll get it.” I say, relieved I don’t have to say anything at the moment. “Saved by the bell.” James says, as I head for it with a wide smile on my face. My youngest brother stands there with Anna’s best friend, Rachel. It looks like they arrived together. Anna’s going to love this. “Vladik.” “Valentin.” We give each other a bro hug. I hug Rachel and we head out to the backyard. It’s a lively party with friends and family, but my gaze hones in on the two most important of my family. Anna and Bella, our two-and-a-half-year-old toddler. The weather is a perfect balmy 70 degrees and sunny, perfect for Easter. But even more perfect are my two gals. “Daddy!” Bella exclaims when she sees me. She is very much into hunting for easter eggs, and she couldn’t look any more adorable in her pink, ruffly chiffon dress. “Look!” Anna gives me a pretty smile, sexy in her lacy, body hugging easter dress. She’s as in love with our daughter as I am. I swing Bella into my arms. She has a pink egg with green stripes on it. “See Daddy. I found this. It’s an egg.” “Beautiful.” I kiss the top of her curly blond head and smile at Anna. Anna smiles back at me and puts her arms around us. “I want down Daddy. I want to play golf with Papa.” I set her down, and she holds out her chubby little hand to James who has a toddler sized plastic golf set with him. Anna’s parents have been the best grandparents, and Bella loves them.

I shake my head and address Anna. “She takes after you.” “And you.” Anna slips her arm around my waist. We watch as James and Bella use the golf set. “I was talking to the ladies inside, and they were wondering something.” “I know.” Anna looks up at me. “More babies. Those two have been drinking since they started cooking this morning.” We laugh. “What do you think? Are you ready Anna?” “Maybe once we get past the terrible twos.” She grins at me, “I don’t know if I can face all the morning sickness with the attitude of our child.” I squeeze her to my side, unbelievably happy. We watch our families and friends, and Anna looks pointedly over at Rachel and Vladik, a look of concern crossing her face. “Your brother is hitting on Rachel. I’ve warned her about him, but I’m not sure she’s warned off.” “They arrived at the same time.” “Oh.” Anna raises her brows. “I see.” “Worried?” “Naw, they’re adults. And I think Vladik is maturing, you’ve helped him stabilize. You’re a good big brother.” Anna’s words nurture my soul. A warm feeling spreads through me, and deep gratitude. She’s my one and only for the rest of my life. I wrap my arms about Anna’s waist and whisper in her ear. “I’m thinking of some very adult things I want to do to you later, Mrs. Tsarev.” Anna cocks an eyebrow at me and looks upward. “Hmm. I like the sounds of that. Tell me more.”

***** Anna I gaze around at my friends and family, reveling in the perfectness of a beautiful fresh spring day, flowers blooming. My man for life has his arms wrapped around me, and we watch as our daughter toddles around with my stepdad. She’s the cutest little Miss Bossy Pants you could ever imagine and has us all wrapped around her pinky finger. My fairy tale was hard fought. The first trimester I insisted on continuing to work at my coffee shop, despite some big fights with Valentine over it, and major morning sickness, and I don’t even want to revisit the labor. We survived, so I count it a win, but I have so much more appreciation for women, now that I know something of what they go through to get us here! My Mom and Señora Madora were ecstatic when they found out, and Valentin quickly charmed his way into my family and Rachels’. He got into real estate developing in North Carolina and brought Vladik with him. Vladik’s more mature now and a good uncle to Bella. He spoils her with presents and is charming to me. There’s still tension with Karin, and even though Valentin and I got married before Bella was born, I’m not sure if Karin and I will ever be besties. His family still gets us stressed, but we’re in a better place now that we decided to split our time between Vermont and North Carolina. Valentin oversees a lot of pies, and he convinced me to take art classes and get going with painting. I still do the ing for the coffee shop I share with Tim. I finally convinced Valentin that I need my own business, just as he needs his. Señora Madora travels with us and acts as a nanny when needed and my parents fill in at other times. We still have a lot to figure out, but there’s no one I’d rather do it with than this man beside me. He is my rock. My lover. My friend. And I thank my lucky stars, and Rachels’ brother, for lending me his big boots, and Señora Madora for her crazy predictions and baby ritual, for the life I have today. All that and my impulsivity and the Tsar’s ruthlessness, which he still must reign in sometimes. I squeeze Valentin’s hand, and we begin to walk towards the kitchen, after the two matriarchs of the family call us for the delicious spread.

We grab Bella’s hand on the way and swing her between us. She giggles. “More Mommy, Daddy.” We laugh with her, glancing at each other in our joy. Rachel looks over at us and says, “That’s the sweetest. You guys are so lucky.” Vladik whispers something in her ear and she laughs. LOL, I can only imagine. Dear god, what next? The End

Hey Beautiful,

Thank you so much for reading, BENEATH THE BILLIONAIRE. I hope you enjoyed the story of Anna and Valentin and their happy ending together as a couple with Bella. If you have the time, please consider leaving a review, and sign up for my newsletter to get notified of the latest book releases and teasers. I wish you and yours safety and happiness during these turbulent times. Best Wishes Always XOXO, Jessie

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About the Author

Jessie dreams up lust fueled romance with an HEA. She hopes you enjoy these stories of alpha billionaire heroes and their sassy strong heroines. Read more at Jessie Knight’s site.