Seminar Body Language 545f72

Body language refers to any kind of bodily movement or posture, including facial expression, which transmits a message to the observer. Every part of the human body, either in motion or stillness, conveys a meaning which depends upon the physical, social, and cultural context of the action. The message may be deliberately intended, expressed in some sort of accepted code — as when a person points, shakes a fist, or nods the head — or they may be involuntary gestures of response, as when someone cries aloud in pain. Behaviours which have been represented as spontaneous or instinctive action expressing the emotions are revealed, under closer scrutiny, to be neither spontaneous nor transparent. They are, to a greater or lesser degree, formalized, stylized, and ordered to a specific code of meaning, which may become meaningless or inappropriate in other places or cultures, or in another context. The gesture of greeting displayed by someone who leaps, smiling, to her feet, to throw her arms around another person, may cause discomfort or even offence to a person unfamiliar with this custom. Body language forms an indispensable element in social interaction. Facial expression and bodily movements can amplify, modify, confirm, or subvert verbal utterance, expressing meanings which elude or sur verbal language. Thus it is a key to the inner psychological and emotional state of the performer The science of body language is a fairly recent study, dating primarily from around 60 years ago, although body language itself is, of course, as old as humans. Psychologists, zoologists, and social anthropologists have conducted detailed research into the components of body language – part of the larger family known as non-verbal behaviour. Speech is a relatively new introduction to the communication process and is mainly used to convey information, including facts and data. Body language, on the other hand, has been around forever. Without relying on the spoken word for confirmation, the body’s movements convey feelings, attitudes, and emotions. Like it or not, your body language, or non-verbal behaviour, says more about you, your attitudes, moods, and emotions, than you may want to reveal. According to research conducted by Professor Albert Mehrabian of the University of California, Los Angeles, 55 per cent of the emotional message in face-to-face communication results from body language. You only have to experience any of the following gestures or expressions to know how true the expression is, ‘Actions speak louder than words’: You walk into a room of strangers and from their stance, movements, and expressions you receive messages about their feelings, moods, attitudes, and emotions.

How you position your head, shoulders, torso, arms, hands, legs, and feet, and how your eyes, mouth, fingers, and toes move, tell an observer more about your state of being, including your attitude, emotions, thoughts, and feelings, than any words you can say. Gesturing can add emphasis to your voice, clarify your meaning, and give impact to your message. Whether your point requires a gentle approach, or a firm telling off, your body’s instinct is to reflect and move in harmony with the emotion. In addition to reinforcing your message, hand signals especially reflect your desire for your message to be taken seriously. Humans are blessed with the ability to create a wide variety of gestures and expressions from the top of the head to the tips of the toes. Gestures can show intention, such as leaning forward just before rising out of a chair; as well as showing no intention, such as crossing arms and legs. Some gestures belong to you, because you’ve become so identifiable by them. Some gestures are displacement gestures: you do them for no reason other than to displace some energy. Some gestures are specific to local customs, and some are universal gestures that everyone does. Signature gestures: Gestures that define who you are A signature gesture is one that you become known by, a common gesture that you perform in a particular way. The person who twirls her curls around her finger, or the one who sucks her thumb, or the one who pats her eyebrows. These gestures give us clues into the person’s personality. Signature gestures set you apart from all others. By recognising signature gestures you can tell what kind of person you’re dealing with. Certain gestures, like clapping the hands together once, show a mind that’s organised. The hair twirling gesture indicates that the person may be a day dreamer. When you successfully read the signs you can figure out how best to manage the person. If you want to be easily identified and ed you can create your own signature gesture. Fake gestures are designed to camouflage, conceal, and fool. They deliberately point you in one direction to make you believe something that isn’t so. Fake gestures pretend to be something when they’re actually something else. Fake gestures are meant to deceive. You’re able to tell a fake gesture from a real one because some of the real gesture’s parts are missing.

Successful people know how to use their bodies for greatest effect. They stand tall, with their chests opened like a well loved book, smiles on their faces, and when they move, they move with purpose. Their moderate and carefully chosen gestures reflect their sense of what they want to project and how they want to be perceived. How you present yourself, how you move and gesture, how you stand, sit, and walk all play their part in creating the image you present and in determining people’s perceptions. By adopting a cluster of postures, positions, and gestures known for the attitudes they effect, you can create any attitude and make it your own. Positive body language looks and feels strong, engaged, and vibrant. Negative body language communicates weaknesses,dullness, and a disconnectedness. Sometimes you want to project one image over another. Whatever image you want to project – moving your head, face, torso, and limbs with confidence, control, and commitment, or creating desired effects with the flick of your wrist or a furrow of your brow – being perceived and responded to in the way you want helps you to achieve your desired results.

We have all experienced instances in which someone is saying one thing and their nonverbal communication says another. We usually believe the nonverbal," says Susan Bixler, author of five books on professional image and president of The Professional Image in Atlanta. "It's an absolutely critical element in the job interview process. The best resume, the absolute best spoken words don't get an individual a job." There are many opportunities during a job interview to display bad—and good—nonverbal communication. Here's how to make the most of what your body is saying. Shake on it Your interviewer's initial nonverbal impression of you comes through your first point of —the Don't be afraid to display a strong, firm handshake. Doing otherwise can make you seem insecure and lacking in confidence.

handshake.

If you have several seating options to choose from, ask your interviewer for instructions—don't just assume and take a seat. How you sit, too, is as important as where you sit. "If you are sitting on the edge of the seat it can make you look eager but also scared, like you are ready to bolt out of the room," Maysonave says. "Go ahead and slide to the back of the chair and sit tall and straight. That will make you look confident and comfortable." Women should not cross their legs and instead sit with their knees together. Men should avoid sitting with their legs too wide apart or crossed with the ankle on top of the knee. Both these positions convey a comfort level that's inappropriate to the job interview situation. "Anything that creates an intimacy before there's a rapport established will signal to the interviewer that you don't use good judgment and that you resort to inappropriate behavior," Maysonave says. Also, make sure you consistently maintain a comfortable space—about 3 feet—from your interviewer. Shortening that space can feel invasive and, again, inappropriately intimate.

Hands down : Nervous hand habits, like nail biting, hair twirling and hand twitching, can distract the interviewer and, convey nervousness and insecurity. You can sit with your hands clasped together or hold on to a small briefcase or organizer through the interview, Maysonave says.

The eyes have it :We have all heard that eye is important—it conveys confidence and respect—but too much eye can be bad, too. "You don't want to make eye for more than three or five seconds. It's too intense to sustain it the whole time—the key is make it, break it, make it, break it," Bixler says. Avoiding eye , especially while answering a question, can convey dishonesty. Body language can speak volumes during an interview The most important communication is often the unspoken kind. Body language, or nonverbal communication, can let interviewers know more about you than what you tell them.

Nonverbal cues offer insight into interview Don't just listen to what your interviewer is saying—watch his or her body language. It can reveal how the interview is going. "If the interviewer touches her nose, she is disapproving somewhat of what you're saying. If she looks at her watch or shuffles papers, you're not on track," says Maysonave. "If she leans toward you, she is engaged and is really listening and taking you seriously. If she's leaning back far into the chair, she is evaluating you with a critical eye." If your interviewer suddenly switches gears—from relaxing in the chair to sitting upright, for example—you may have said something that he needs to evaluate from a different perspective. You can tell a difficult question is coming if the interviewer places his fingertips together in an upright, steeple-like fashion. "This signals that he has disconnected from the interviewee, and is thinking about what he will say next, possibly considering how to say something unpleasant or uncomfortable or how to ask a delicate or emotionally-charged question," Maysonave says. And don't ignore the obvious signs. "If the interviewer stands up, the interview is over," Maysonave says. According to one UCLA study, about 93 percent of a person’s communication effectiveness is determined by nonverbal cues. Think of the Three V’s:

visual (appearance), vocal (voice) and verbal (what you say). Another study by the University of Toledo concluded that the first 30 seconds make or break the connection between two people who meet for the first time. So when you’re on an interview, the interviewer probably has made some conclusions about you before you even say anything!

The Drill Follow the seven steps in the 2 Minute Drill to guide you toward a best-case interview: • Appearance counts. When you look good, you feel good. Make sure you look groomed and neat. If you were a book, would someone want to read more? • Your clothes and accessories should be conservative and neutral, rather than wild and loud. Your clothes are your packaging and should not take attention away from the product. • Nonverbal communication sometimes conveys a stronger message than verbal communication. When you slouch, whether sitting or standing, you're saying volumes about you and your confidence level. Sit up straight . When you stand, make yourself as tall as possible: shoulders back and head held high. • Eye and smiles can indicate a confident and upbeat attitude. You will notice that many job postings ask for enthusiasm and energy. This is a good opportunity to demonstrate your social and interpersonal skills as well as your excitement about the opportunity for which you're interviewing. • The handshake sends a strong tactile message. Whether your hands are hot and sweaty or cold and clammy, you can try some tricks to control the temperature. To cool your hands, try running cold water on the insides of your wrists. Use hot water if your hands are cool. If you have particularly sweaty hands, try using a deodorant gel (antiperspirant) as a lotion. • Your voice and the volume of your speech convey a strong impression. Whether the interview's over the phone or face-to-face, you should speak with enthusiasm and energy. Use a firm voice to demonstrate your confidence. Your vocabulary reveals your communication skills and ability to interact with people, especially ones you've not met before. The words you choose will say something about you, as well as your knowledge of the industry. It is important to use "their" words and talk "their" talk. 1. Don’t cross your arms or legs – You have probably already heard you shouldn’t cross your arms as it might make you seem defensive or guarded. This goes for your legs too. Keep your arms and legs open. 2. Have eye , but don’t stare – If there are several people you are talking to, give them all some eye to create a better connection and see if they are listening. Keeping too much eye- might creep people out. Giving no eye- might make you seem insecure. If you are not used to keeping eye- it might feel a little hard or scary in the beginning but keep working on it and you’ll get used to it.

3. Don’t be afraid to take up some space – Taking up space by for example sitting or standing with your legs apart a bit signals self-confidence and that you are comfortable in your own skin. 4. Relax your shoulders – When you feel tense it’s easily winds up as tension in your shoulders. They might move up and forward a bit. Try to relax. Try to loosen up by shaking the shoulders a bit and move them back slightly. 5. Nod when they are talking – nod once in a while to signal that you are listening. But don’t overdo it and peck like Woody Woodpecker. 6. Don’t slouch, sit up straight – but in a relaxed way, not in a too tense manner. 7. Lean, but not too much – If you want to show that you are interested in what someone is saying, lean toward the person talking. If you want to show that you’re confident in yourself and relaxed lean back a bit. But don’t lean in too much or you might seem needy and desperate for some approval. Or lean back too much or you might seem arrogant and distant. 8. Smile and laugh – lighten up, don’t take yourself too seriously. Relax a bit, smile and laugh when someone says something funny. People will be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you seem to be a positive person. But don’t be the first to laugh at your own jokes, it makes you seem nervous and needy. Smile when you are introduced to someone but don’t keep a smile plastered on your face, you’ll seem insincere. 9. Don’t touch your face – it might make you seem nervous and can be distracting for the listeners or the people in the conversation. 10. Keep you head up - Don’t keep your eyes on the ground, it might make you seem insecure and a bit lost. Keep your head up straight and your eyes towards the horizon. 11. Slow down a bit – this goes for many things. Walking slower not only makes you seem more calm and confident, it will also make you feel less stressed. If someone addresses you, don’t snap you’re neck in their direction, turn it a bit more slowly instead. 12. Don’t fidget – try to avoid, phase out or transform fidgety movement and nervous ticks such as shaking your leg or tapping your fingers against the table rapidly. You’ll seem nervous and fidgeting can be a distracting when you try to get something across. Declutter your movements if you are all over the place. Try to relax, slow down and focus your movements. 13. Use your hands more confidently – instead of fidgeting with your hands and scratching your face use them to communicate what you are trying to say. Use your hands to describe something or to add weight to a point you are trying to make. But don’t use them to much or it might become distracting. And don’t let your hands flail around, use them with some control.

14. Lower your drink – don’t hold your drink in front of your chest. In fact, don’t hold anything in front of your heart as it will make you seem guarded and distant. Lower it and hold it beside your leg instead.

15. Realise where you spine ends – many people (including me until recently) might sit or stand with a straight back in a good posture. However, they might think that the spine ends where the neck begins and therefore crane the neck forward in a Montgomery Burns-pose. Your spine ends in the back of your head. Keep you whole spine straight and aligned for better posture.

16. Don’t stand too close –one of the things we learned from Seinfeld is that everybody gets weirded out by a close-talker. Let people have their personal space, don’t invade it.

17. Mirror - Often when you get along with a person, when the two of you get a good connection, you will start to mirror each other unconsciously. That means that you mirror the other person’s body language a bit. To make the connection better you can try a bit of proactive mirroring. If he leans forward, you might lean forward. If she holds her hands on her thighs, you might do the same. But don’t react instantly and don’t mirror every change in body language. Then weirdness will ensue.

18. Keep a good attitude – last but not least, keep a positive, open and relaxed attitude. How you feel will come through in your body language and can make a major difference. For information on how make yourself feel better read 10 ways to change how you feel and for relaxation try A very simple way to feel relaxed for 24 hours. The following list takes some common body postures and states the persons position. Arms crossed: Defensive and cautious. Resting chin on palm: Critical, cynical and negative towards the other person. Dropping eyeglasses onto the lower bridge of the nose and peering over them: Causes negative reactions in others. Slowly and deliberately taking off glasses and carefully cleaning the lens: The person wants to pause and think before raising opposition or asking for clarification.

Pinching bridge of the nose: Communicates great thought and concern. Nose-rubbing or nose-touching: A sign of doubt, it often reveals a negative reaction. Rubbing around ears: Performed while weighing an answer, commonly coupled with 'well, I don't know'. Resting feet on a desk or chair: Gestures of territorial hegemony. Swaying back: Weak ego. Retracted shoulders: Suppressed anger. Direct Eye : Interested, likes you Smiling Eyes: Is comfortable Relaxed Brow: Comfortable Limited or No Eye : Lying, uninterested, too confined, uncomfortable, distracted Tension in Brow : Confusion, tension, fear Shoulders hunched forward : Lacking interest or feeling inferior Rigid Body Posture : Anxious, uptight Crossed arms : Can be just cold, protecting the body, or defensive Tapping Fingers : Agitated, anxious, bored Fidgeting with hands or objects (i.e., pen) : Bored or has something to say Leaning forward : Interested Fingers Interlocked placed behind the head leaving elbows open and armpits exposed : Very open to ideas, comfortable Mirroring you : Likes you and wants to be friendly Still : More interested in what you are saying than anything Eyes open slightly more than usual: Gives people the impression that they are welcome.

Breath faster: Nervous or angry Inhaling loudly and shortly: Wants to interrupt a speaking person Loud sigh: Understand the thing that is being told. Twisting the feet continuously : A person is nervous or concerned, but can also mean that a person is stressed or angry and that he don't want to show that to everybody. Legs wide apart or Sitting straddle-legged: Shows that a person is feeling safe, and is self - confident. Can also show leadership. A big smile that goes on longer and disappears slower.: Unreal or fake smile Crossed legs with highest foot in the direction of the speaker.: Relaxed and selfconfident and they are listening very carefully. Rapidly nodding your head : Shows impatient and eager to add something to the conversation Slowly nodding: Shows interest and that they are validating the comments of the interviewer, and this subtly encourages him to continue. Dangling the loose shoe from the toes : Signals physical attraction Rubbing your collar: Nerves Adjusting your tie: Insecurity Pressed Lips: Pressed lips convey disagreement and disapproval. It communicates a desire to end the discussion. A raised chin implies aggression that may be acted on if the conversation is not ended. Pursed Lips: This is also a sign of disapproval. It indicates that the person has fixed views that cannot be changed. This usually reveals an arrogant and superficial character. Biting the Lips: The person expresses embarrassment when he bites his lips. He also communicates a lack of self-confidence. Reading Hand Signals: People have been granted with two hands: the left and the right hand. The left has been dubbed as the "emotional hand" since an imaginary line can be drawn from the third finger leading directly to the heart. This is why the wedding ring is placed on this finger. The right hand, literally on the other hand. has been named the "proper hand" since it is with this hand that people communicate a blocking or stopping signal.

Open Hands: Open hands may be demonstrated by showing the palm of one's hand, especially in a conversation or an argument.. This expresses a trust in other and an interest in their opinions. It also offers an opinion and invites the sharing of the other person's view. Covered Hands: This is expressed by raising the back of one or both hands against others. This indicates the setting up of barriers or the keeping of distance. It is an act of concealing feelings and covering insecurity Clinging Hands: Those who cling to objects, such as handbags. files or tables. show a need for . This action conveys confusion or insecurity. It expresses fear and difficulty in coping with the current situation. Twisted Hands ( crossing both hands then clasping the palms together) : Expression of a complex personality. It may indicate a difficult emotional life. The way the palms are held together conveys a need to hide something. Clasping the hands : indicates defence. Shrugged shoulders: You can recognize stressed shoulders by the fact that they are a bit shrugged, which does make the head look smaller. The meaning of the signal comes from crouching in dangerous situations. The meaning of this posing depends on the combination. In combination with big eyes it means that someone is concerned about something that is going to happen. In combination with a face that is turned away it means that the person wants to be left alone. An introvert person has nearly always those stressed shoulders. Difference in level of both shoulders: By most of the people the left and the right shoulder are of the same height. When they are not, it often means that someone is doubting about what he is going to do. With this movement we simulate (unconscious) that we are weighing the possibilities. Sometimes when someone makes this movement, his head will move a little like he is looking above. Crossed arms: There are a lot of different explanations of the meaning of crossed arms. When someone has crossed arms and he is shaking his head it means that he does not agree with you. But he can also cross his arms when he is frightened, then his arms give him some protection. Another option is that he is feeling cold and he is trying to hold his body-warmth with him. When someone is sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, it indicates that the person is relaxed. Making a fist from your hands: A fist is a sign for aggression. It comes from hitting someone. But it is seldom used with a threatening meaning. Most of the time it is used to indicate that you are angry or irritated. Holding the hand before the mouth: Holding a hand before your mouth means that you

are hiding something. In western countries it is impolite to belch or to hiccup. So someone can hold his hand before his mouth to hide that he is hiccupping. When someone puts his hand before his mouth when he is talking it indicates that he is saying something or has said something that he did not want to say. Making the eyes look larger: The meaning of making the eyes look larger can be that someone is astonished. In that case he opens his mouth a little. It can also mean that he is happy or that he likes the thing that is talked about. And because it means that you like something, you can use it on purpose. It pleases people when you have your eyes opened a bit further. When people open their eyes a bit further it can also mean that they are unhappily surprised. Then they will frown their eyebrows. Raising the eyebrows: Raising the eyebrows shortly means that people are surprised. They raise their eyebrows to allow them to look better. But it can also mean that somebody is looking at you, and that he likes you. Raised forehead: A raised forehead often means that someone is ing something he has seen. This often happens very quickly. It can also be a sign of a certain emotion. It is a biological reflex that you raise your forehead a little when you are crying so the tears can move easier. Pursed lips: When somebody purses his lips it means that he has to make a decision and is thinking about that. Sometimes he also moves his lips, like he is saying the possibilities. When somebody purses his lips, he often looks a bit upward. Firm Handshake: The strong, firm handshake usually is given by a person who is sure and confident of themselves. Weak hand shake: People who give these types of handshakes are either nervous, shy, insecure, or afraid of interaction with other people. Cleared your throat: Nervousness. Bitten your fingernails: Nervousness. Wring your hands: Nervousness. Paced the floor: Nervousness. A person is bouncing their legs and their arms are crossed over or their torso is slumped: Closed off