Suns of the World
A Short Story
Heather Ormsby
Copyright © 2021 by Heather Ormsby
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
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Contents
Introduction
Suns of the World
About the Author
Also by Heather Ormsby
Introduction
When I was younger, a few years out of college, I took a long road trip alone through Colorado, Utah, Arizona, and New Mexico. It was an amazing trip where I could take my time and stop whenever I wanted to see things along the way. I met with friends in Salt Lake City, Albuquerque, and Crested Butte. But what I most was driving to the Grand Canyon at sunrise. Watching the sun reveal the colors of the Canyon as it rose, I felt like I was all alone in the world at that moment. But I also felt connected to this wide, wonderful world. That trip was the inspiration for this story.
Suns of the World
Cecilia was just starting to regret that last bottle of soda she had drunk - the need to visit a restroom was coming on strong - when she saw the sign for the motel where she had made our reservation. She was impressed and relieved by how clean and new everything looked at this post in the middle of nowhere. The motel was on Navajo Reservation land in the middle of the wild desert landscape of Arizona. Cecilia had expected it to look a bit battered and rundown. Tony would have said it would be for sure. That was one of the reasons she hadn’t told him where she’d booked their night’s stay on the way to the Grand Canyon. It didn’t matter now. He wasn’t here to see it and be amazed at how wrong he was. Not that he would accept that. ‘Just give a year or two, and the motel will look weather-worn and rundown soon enough,’ he’d say. Maybe it would. But right now, it was all new adobe and bright clean windows for the rest-stop restaurant, gift shop, and the attached motel. The gas station and parking lot in front of the reception area was mostly empty. It was late fall, off-season for the trip. This had kept the rates low and was the main reason they had planned their road trip for October. Cecilia pulled in near the door and turned off the ignition. The silence, once the engine and fan noises were gone was, was a relief. Only the occasional ping from the cooling engine broke the quiet, and she sat there for a while to enjoy it. Even the constantly bickering voices in her head were quiet. The sensations in her bladder, however, told her she needed to get out. Opening the door of the dusty sedan, she stepped out and straightened up. Her hips were a bit sore from sitting for so long. It had been a long drive from Houston. Slinging her purse over one shoulder, she shut the car door and then walked up to the entrance. When she got inside, she took off her sunglasses and waited for her eyes to adjust to the relative darkness of the interior. After hours of the sun
glare on the road, it took her a minute to be able to see. As her pupils dilated, she was able to see that she was inside a curio and tourist shop, full of dolls in Native American dress, postcards and books, road maps, ceramic mugs and keychains, and glass counters displaying silver and turquoise jewelry. In the back to her left was an entrance for a small restaurant. The sign above the doorway said, ‘Navajo Tacos, Fry Bread, Fresh Corn’. She could imagine Tony, her mind’s companion for all the drive, sneering at everything. ‘Cheap goods made in China and sold to naive tourists,’. She walked up to one of the glass counters and looked at the jewelry. The earrings and bracelets that were arranged there didn’t look cheap. They were beautiful works in what looked like heavy silver. Sky-blue chunks of turquoise were inlaid into designs that looked like the images of animals or in geometric designs. “Can I help you?” A young woman was now standing at the counter in the back of the room under a sign that said, ‘Rooms for Rent’. She had long, straight black hair, and was wearing earrings that were large silver discs stamped with images of the sun. Cecilia walked over to her. “Yes, I have a reservation under Morris.” The young woman tapped on the computer keyboard in front of her. “I see you have a reservation for two people for one night’s stay.” “It’s just me, I’m afraid. My husband couldn’t make it.” The young woman looked at Cecilia, and then her eyes flicked down to Cecilia’s left hand that was resting on the counter. She had removed her wedding band, but the white mark it had left on her skin was still visible. There was a moment’s pause, but then the receptionist said, “I won’t be able to adjust the room rate.” “That’s not a problem.”
Nodding her head, the woman made some more clicks on her keyboard, then she reached under the counter and pulled out a keycard for the room. She put it into a white paper envelope and wrote the number 12 on it in blue pen. “This is your room number. The room is in the building to your left when you go back outside. It’s on the second floor. We don’t have an elevator, but the stairs will be on the left side of the building. There’s plenty of parking along there.” “Thank you.” Cecilia picked up the key. “What time does the restaurant open?” “It’s open all the time. Just walk up to the counter there and tap the bell. Someone will come out to assist you.” Cecilia walked back out to the car, putting on her sunglasses again as she stepped out. She got back into the car and moved it to be near the stairs of the motel rooms, then she got out her small suitcase and walked up to her room. Room 12 was on the far corner, and when she walked in, she was impressed with how large the room was. The bed was a King size, and the bathroom had a full counter at the sink, and a bathtub in addition to the walk-in shower. After freshening up in the bathroom, she was more comfortable, and Cecilia walked around the room. Everything was very clean. and it looked like it had been just built. It had to be at least six months old, however, since six months ago she had made the reservations. There was a large ‘No Smoking’ sign on the door, and again on the bathroom sink’s counter. Tony would have grumbled about that, but Cecilia was relieved to not have to smell the stale smoke that would have clung to the curtains and in the carpet of a ‘smoking’ room. Tony smoked at least two packs of cigarettes a day. Cecilia didn’t smoke, and she hated the smell that permeated everything in their apartment, and the ashy mess it left on the tables, no matter how often she emptied and cleaned the ashtrays. She unpacked her toiletries and got out her nightshirt and laid it on the bed. Then, she stretched herself out on the bed, to lie there in the quiet, and rest a moment. She crossed her hands on her stomach, and the fingers of her right hand rubbed lightly at the empty place on her left ring finger.
When the doctor had told her that the itching she had felt in her crotch had been crabs, she had been mortified with embarrassment. She had needed to get a medicated lotion to kill the pubic lice, and then she needed to disinfect all of their bedding and towels, and then the couch and the carpet. Tony had been away on a business trip, so while she was cleaning the apartment, she raged at him in her mind and fumed, yelling obscenities into the air and having whole arguments with him in her head. Because she had only slept with him during their three-year marriage, the only way she could have gotten the STD was from Tony sleeping around with someone else. By the time Tony came home, Cecilia was calm but resolute. When he walked in the door, she threw a bottle of medicated lotion at him. “You have crabs. Put your clothes in the washing machine, take a shower, and use this cream. You’re sleeping on the couch tonight.” He sputtered and tried to deny it, but his hand kept creeping up to scratch at the crotch of his jeans. Finally, he tried to blame her for bring the lice into the home. “No, Tony. You’re the only man I’ve ever been with. Can you say the same?” “Ceecee, you know it’s hard with me being on the road all the time. A man has needs.” “Desires and needs are two different things.” Cecilia then walked into the bedroom and locked the door. She cried all night, and the next morning, Tony had left. When Cecilia was at work later that week, Tony had come to the apartment and packed up all of his things, and some of hers, as well, like the laptop and her gold jewelry. He left divorce papers on the kitchen counter. They hadn’t been married long, and they had very few assets since neither of them was good at saving money. So, she signed the divorce papers and quit the lease on the apartment and moved into a studio closer to where she worked. Her parents had wanted her to move back home. And even though she had never
lived alone, she didn’t want to move back home. It would have meant defeat and failure. When October came around, she saw on her calendar the reminders for this roadtrip. She still had the money for the trip in her personal savings . This trip was supposed to be a Wedding Anniversary present for Tony who had always wanted to see the Grand Canyon. She had looked around her small apartment. She was still full of anger at Tony. She hated having to answer the questions of all their friends and family about what had happened. Her mother told her that if only she had gotten pregnant, she could have held on to her marriage. The overwhelming helplessness of the situation confused her, and all she did, when not at work, was sit at home and watch romance movies and eat junk food. She had gained twenty pounds in the last two months alone. Why not just take the trip? The thought scared and excited her at the same time. Did she dare go alone? Cecilia had always ired the few girls she knew who weren’t afraid to go to restaurants, or out to a movie, by themselves. When she had mentioned this to her friend, Anita, Anita had scoffed. “You have friends to do things with. Why would you want to go out by yourself? Maybe to have the quiet to think, or to do the things that I really want to do without compromise? She didn’t say this out loud. She didn’t want to offend Anita. But Cecilia had grown up in a large family and in school had been relatively popular and surrounded by friends. And it was exhausting. Sometimes, she thought she’d been popular in school because she was pretty, and she wasn’t contrary. She would agree with others just to get along, and never stated an unpopular opinion – even if she held one – just so she wouldn’t rock the boat. Now, laying alone in her bed at night, she wondered why she had been so afraid
of saying her mind? Maybe it was her Mother who always warned her that boys didn’t like girls who didn’t need them, or who acted too smart. Or her Church, where a woman’s place was in the home as a balm and helpmate for their husband. Or maybe it was her girlfriends who spent all their time dres and wearing their hair and makeup in ways to make them fit in with everyone else. Never talking about politics or about books they had read. Always just about boys and their future weddings and how many children they wanted to raise. So, she put in her vacation request with work, and when the day came, she packed her bag and a cooler with lunch and snacks, got out the road atlas, filled up her gas tank, and hit the road. She didn’t tell anyone where she was going. She didn’t even tell her Mother she was taking a vacation. If her Mother needed to reach her, she could just call her on her cell phone. The highway had spooled out before her and she was mesmerized by the road, broken only by the roadside stops and the truckers who zoomed around and past her. She didn’t even listen to the radio. Tony talked incessantly in her mind, but the relief she felt at not actually having him speaking out loud made her wonder if she ever even liked him. Sometimes she yelled out loud, “Shut the fuck up!”, just because she could. Cecilia startled awake. She hadn’t meant to fall asleep. She looked at her watch but couldn’t see the time. The sun had set, and it was dark in the motel room. She sat up and turned on the lamp by the bed. Her watch said it was eight o’clock. Her stomach rumbled. Hopefully it wasn’t too late to get some dinner. She washed her hands and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She fluffed her hair, and then left, careful to take her purse with her and to lock the motel room. When she approached the little diner’s counter, she saw the place was quiet and empty, but she rang the bell that sat on the counter next to the cash . The
bell rang loud and clear and a moment later, an old woman shuffled out to her from the back kitchen. She was short, maybe about four and a half feet tall. Her long hair was brown, streaked with white and tied back into a ponytail. “Yes?” Cecilia smiled. “I was wondering if I could still get some dinner?” “Come, come,” the woman motioned to her and led her to a small table along the wall. She handed her a menu that was typed up on a long, narrow piece of paper. “Drink?” “Do you have any iced tea?” “Umm hmm,” the woman mumbled, and she walked off, presumably to get some iced tea.” Cecilia looked over the menu. There were just a few options, but front and center was the Navajo taco that she had seen on the sign over the entrance. She shrugged. She liked tacos, so why not? When the woman came back and set down a tall plastic glass filled with ice cubes and tea and a lemon wedge, Cecilia asked for the Navajo taco. The woman nodded and headed back to the kitchen. Cecilia checked her phone while she waited. There were no missed called or messages. She tried to check her emails, but there didn’t seem to be any internet connection available. She could hear sounds coming from the kitchen that sounded promisingly of food, so she just sat there and waited. She wondered if there was anyone else staying here at all. She hadn’t noticed any other cars in the lot on her walked over to the diner. After about ten minutes, the old woman came out carrying a large plate. When she set it down in front of her, Cecilia saw it was a large disc of fluffy fried bread covered in fried ground beef, beans, lettuce, tomatoes, green onions, and cheese. “Thank you,” she said. The woman nodded her head and shuffled to a different table where she sat down. She began to hum to herself, apparently waiting for
Cecilia to finish her meal. Cecilia looked again at her plate. It didn’t look like any taco she had ever eaten, but it smelled good. There was a bottle of hot sauce sitting on the table next to shakers of salt and pepper. She shook some onto the ‘taco’ and then she began to eat, cutting up the fry bread with the knife and fork that had been rolled up inside a napkin. The food was good, and nice and hot. Before she knew it, she had eaten every last piece of food on her plate. Then she finished her iced tea and sat back. The old woman stood up and came to pick up the place. “Thank you, that was delicious,” Cecilia said. The old woman smiled wide, and Cecilia could see that she was missing several teeth. It was a little startling, but the smile was genuine, and the woman’s eyes almost disappeared in the folds and wrinkles above her cheeks. Cecilia paid her bill with cash. She stepped into the gift shop and bought a couple of bottles of water to take back with her to her room. She would need the water for the rest of her drive tomorrow to the Canyon. In the parking lot on her walk over to her motel room, Cecilia saw a man leaning against his car trunk. He was smoking a cigarette, and when he saw Cecilia looking at him, he tugged at the brim of his baseball cap and nodded at her. Cecilia hurried up the stairs and into her room. She was a little nervous now. It had been different when it was her and the other two women who worked here. She looked around the room. There was a desk chair, and she moved this over to the door. She had bolted the door, but now she also tilted the chair back against the door, so that if someone tried to force their way in, the back chair legs would dig into the floor and form some resistance. “You’re being ridiculous,” she said out loud to herself. Nonetheless, she felt a little better having done this. While she waited for her dinner to digest a bit before she tried to go to sleep, she looked over the map to see what roads she needed to take tomorrow. The park entrance didn’t seem too far, maybe two hours away.
She still had half a tank of gas, but she was relieved to see that there was a small town near the park entrance that seemed to be there just to service the tourists with gas and food before and after their trip into the park. When she went to bed, she was able to fall asleep right away, being still fatigued from the long drive, but she woke up at four in the morning. She was wide awake and knew she wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep. She stood up and decided to just get an early start on the day. She showered, dressed, and made a little cup of coffee in the little coffee pot near the television. She would have to get more later, but this would at least get her going. There was no one in the gift shop even though the shop was unlocked, and the lights were on. Cecilia shrugged. They had her credit card, so she just left her room key on the counter by the . Then she rolled her suitcase out to the car, put it in the trunk, then got into the driver’s seat with her purse and the bottled water she’d purchased next to her on the enger seat. Next stop – the Grand Canyon. She never knew why Tony had wanted to come to the Grand Canyon so much. Maybe because it was a great American landscape? He never talked about traveling and seeing other countries. He hated dealing with foreigners. Just staying on a Navajo Reservation would have been almost more than he could take. And he never wanted to travel to any of the big cities here in the United States, that weren’t Houston. ‘Too many Democrats,’ he’d say. “Besides, babe,” he said to Cecilia one night when she talked about wanting to visit Paris, “I travel all the time for my job. It’s tiring, and I just want to be home here with you.” “But you just travel to small, rural towns selling farming equipment. Don’t you want to see some of the world?” “Nah. You’re all the world I need.” He smiled at her. “Would you grab me a fresh beer now, darlin’.”
“Such bullshit,” she said out loud. She’d already seen more of this world in the last two days than she’d ever had. Her family had never traveled – it was too expensive – and her father was much the same as Tony. So far, it wasn’t really scary. It was kind of interesting. Up ahead, she could see the lights of the little town near the park entrance. The sun was just starting to come up and add some color to the world. She pulled into the gas station. The attendant wasn’t in, but the gas was selfservice with a credit card. She’d just have to get more coffee sometime later today. With a full tank, Cecilia relaxed a bit, and she followed the brown and white National Park signs to the Grand Canyon entrance. The land looked flat to her. She didn’t really know what to expect, but eventually she drove into a little pine forest until she came to a hut and a gate. There was no attendant there. She looked at her dash clock and saw that it was seven in the morning. Too early? The gates were open, though. Did she dare? She looked around. There was no sign of anyone and there weren’t any signs instructing her on what to do. Maybe she could pay the park entrance fee when she left? Ok. Here we go. She drove forward slowly. No one came out to chase her down. She kept going and followed the signs that pointed out different pullouts for scenic overlooks. She let a few of those by. She wanted to put some distance between her and the entrance gate. She finally chose a place to park her car. When she got out, there was a chill in the air, so she put her jacket on and then walked to the fence that marked the overlook. The Canyon spread out before her. The sun lit up the top of the opposite side, but she couldn’t yet see the bottom. There was a bench there, so she sat down and waited for the morning to unfold. She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, but about every ten minutes it seemed,
she saw another color in the rocks of the Canyon as the light seemed to crawl down the rockface. Shades of purple, red, yellow, pink, and brown filled her vision. Eventually she stood again and gazed down into the Canyon. It was huge. Yes, it’s called the Grand Canyon. You expect it to be big, right? No. It is huge. Gigantic. Wide and deep. Looking down, you can barely see the river below that carved this thing out of the rock. She knew that people walked down pathways to the river, and then had to climb back up. She couldn’t imagine how long that would take. And what if you fell off the edge of the trail? She leaned forward to look down again and got a little dizzy. All of her life, people had talked to her of God, telling her who he was and what he wanted of her. No. This was what God was. Something huge, and glorious, and awe-inspiring, but also something that would hardly have any thought of her. I’m just this little person, living a little life in the face of this amazing thing. It was intimidating, but also exhilarating. Who was to take notice of her if she wanted to live her life the way she chose? Her family? Their lives were just as small. She breathed in deep and she could smell the pine of the scrub forest behind her. Briefly, she thought about what the first people to see this place must have thought. Did they see God as well? Behind her, she began to hear other cars moving along the Canyon rim road. She went back to her car and moved on to the next overlook, and the next, until she came to the end of them. She had to share the view with others now, but other than the children who are always loud, people seemed to be in as much awe as she had been. Many of them took picture after picture with their cameras and phones. Cecilia didn’t bother. How do you take a picture of God? It’s more about the feel of the place, and that couldn’t be replicated in a photo or poster. Cecilia had seen pictures of the Grand Canyon before, and none of them made her feel like this.
After she left the park and was sitting in a fast-food restaurant with a burger and a large coffee, Cecilia realized her life would be different now. Not because she would be a poor and pitiful divorcee with a philandering exhusband, but because she finally felt free. Free and with a purpose. She would spend the rest of her life searching out the places of God in the world. Not because she felt she had to, but because she wanted to live her life in search of that feeling of awe and inspiration she had experienced this morning. Cecilia pulled out a pen from her purse and picked up the postcard she had purchased along with her lunch. It was a large card with a beautiful picture of the Grand Canyon. She addressed it to her ex-husband and wrote: ‘I’m glad you’re not here with me, but you really should come see this place someday. Thanks for the divorce.’
About the Author
Heather Ormsby lives in Denver, Colorado. A former library supervisor, she has spent most of her working life surrounded by books, and likes it that way. Her current day job is in Visitor Operations at a Denver museum. She spends the rest of her time as a writer, photographer, and artist. She primarily writes mysteries and short stories, sometimes under different pen names. When she isn’t writing, she spends her time hiking in the Rocky Mountains, working in the garden, or traveling the world with her camera in hand. You can find links to her books and photography at HeatherOrmsby.com.
Also by Heather Ormsby
Rowan O’Donnell Mysteries
Sharp Focus
Depth of Field
Ambient Light
Rye Gannon Mysteries
Mysteries, Magic, and the God of Secrets: Private Investigator Rye Gannon Short Story Collection
Short Story Collections
Crow Feather: Ghostly Tales and Perilous Adventures in the Rock Mountains