The Better Thing 1v6q5m

THE BETTER THING

PJ HOGE

Copyright © 2017 by PJ Hoge.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2017905715 ISBN: Hardcover Softcover eBook

978-1-5434-1581-0 978-1-5434-1580-3 978-1-5434-1579-7

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only. Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Rev. date: 04/17/2017

Xlibris 1-888-795-4274 www.Xlibris.com 760360

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With special thanks to Mike, Mark, Dorie, Sherry and Sarah

Other Books in the Prairie Preacher Series

Prairie Preacher Victoria’s Nest Rainbows & Rattlesnakes Z Kartoffel Noggin Coot & the Gophers Life in the Petunia Patch Pickle Jar Potato Peelings Winter Shadows Venom of the Queen Bee Probably Yesterday Buck Fifty Families! Good, Bad & Wobbly Loose Ends Miss Puffer and the Banshee Rusty Zipper

Flutes and Fiddles Balancing Rock Summer Rain

Coming soon:

Rats in the Sleeping Bag

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Twenty-four year old Autumn Simms nervously looked out the window of the airplane. It was the first time that she had ever seen the prairies. She had heard about them to be sure, but had never seen them herself. Although she knew they were not wooded, from the air they looked nearly barren. Born and raised in the lushness of the deep South, she could barely imagine anything treeless, except maybe a desert. She leaned back in her seat, ‘I’m certain there will be many things I’ve never imagined. Who would have ever thought that this July, I’d be moving to the northern prairies? I sure hope this isn’t another blunder!’ The brunette fiddled with the end of her seat belt and tried to keep from a total meltdown. Since May, her well-organized life had become a major, unadulterated disaster. There was little she could even refer to without her hazel eyes welling up with tears and her stomach contracting in agony. Autumn tried to think of something pleasant. Nothing came to her. Everything was dampened by the recent events. She had always been one who made a plan and adhered to it. She set her aim and worked to achieve it. Everything was organized. She had graduated college and then received her RN pin and degree from Lawrence Medical in mid-May. She had a job lined up for the beginning of June. Her new employers promised her the time off for her wedding and honeymoon, even though she would have only worked a couple days before then. She would use that time for orientation. After she and Brad returned from their honeymoon, she would begin work in earnest. They were only going to be gone a few days. The girl shook her head and returned to gazing out the window. This landscape was not exactly what she and Brad planned to be seeing. She and Brad were going to Rio de Janeiro for four days for their honeymoon! They had planned it for months and were anxiously looking forward to it. Instead, she was on a plane over the Midwest. The pilot announced they would be landing in Bismarck in about twenty minutes. He said the weather was eighty-five degrees and light winds from the

west. A pleasant day in the early 1970’s, and the first day of her new life.

‘I hope Auntie Alma doesn’t forget me. If I right, she said it is quite a drive to their farm. I can’t believe I’m doing this. If she isn’t there to meet me, I’ll just die.’ She rubbed her hands together and noticed her engagement ring. Stopping and staring at it for a minute, she frowned, ‘I probably should take this off. I have no idea why I am still wearing it. If only…’ She stopped herself. That if only preamble always led to a crying jag, which she didn’t need now. Auntie Alma had been a saint to invite her to stay at their place. Since Uncle George was still struggling with his chemotherapy, she really didn’t need to put up with her whimpering as well. Certainly Auntie Alma could use some help, but everyone knew she had it under control. The request for her to come up was for Autumn’s sake, not Alma’s. It was Autumn who was falling apart. She sighed and reached for her purse from under the seat. The girl looked into her hand mirror and shook her head in repulsion. She not only felt like a wreck, but looked like one. She went to the restroom and tried to do some magic on herself. It was an improvement, but by no means the creation of any glamor queen. She looked like a drudge. A total frump. The beige pantsuit she had chosen for the trip only compounded that. It was like she was. Functional. She combed her short, curly ash brown hair and debated about putting on some makeup. The stewardess clicked on the intercom and told everyone to return to their seats. Her only consolation was that it solved the debate. Now she had an excuse to not put make up on.

Soon she was going down the steps to the tarmac in Bismarck. It was the capital city, in the center of the state of North Dakota. Her aunt and uncle’s farm was about 60 plus miles northeast of there, near a tiny hamlet named Merton. It should be a good place to hide out. The population was low so it likely wouldn’t require much interaction with other folks. She knew Auntie Alma and Uncle George very well. She could be as comfortable around them as her own parents, or even more so. Living out on the isolated prairies sounded to her like just what she needed. Alone, peace, and quiet solitude. She craved that and she was rather confident that life in rural Merton would be that place.

Alma and George Jessup were waiting inside the terminal with welcoming arms. Once in Auntie Alma’s embrace, she let a few tears slip down her cheeks but they were expected. She loved these people. “You look good, Auntie Alma,” she said. “I love your hair that way.” “Thank you,” Alma Jessup beamed. “My girls did a make-over on me. They were embarrassed to be seen in public with my dowdy self!” Autumn smiled, but she couldn’t help but wonder what they would do with the dowdy self she was nurturing! It was okay however, because she didn’t plan to be seen in public. She reached out to Uncle George and gave him a hug, “You look a little thinner, but other than that you still have that devilish glint in your eye!” “I’m holding on to that!” the man in his seventies said. “The good Lord put it there for a reason!” “I’m sure he did,” Autumn agreed. George Jessup hugged his niece and then said, “I brought the farm truck so we could haul all your baggage! I suppose we should start retrieving it if we want to get home before nightfall.” “You are so bad, Uncle George.” Autumn said, “Actually, I only have two bags. Mother sent the rest Parcel Post, so expect a semi-truck any day now.” “Ye gads, we only set aside one room for you.” Uncle George frowned, “I suppose we’ll need to remodel, Ma! Looks like the girl will use that room for her closet!” “No worries George, I’ll jam both pair of your jeans into your sock drawer and we’ll do fine!” Alma took her hand, “Come. Let’s get over to baggage claim and let these other folks do their greeting.” As they approached the conveyor belt, the bags were snaking their way in from the tarmac. George turned to her, “I hope you marked them so we know which is whose. I mean it would be a sad thing to drag home a bag of diamonds instead of your bloomers, huh?”

Autumn grinned. Now she ed why she loved him so much. Auntie Alma was her mother’s sister and a saint, but Uncle George, while always kind, understanding, but full of the devil and loved to tease. Even when he was disciplining you, he managed to tease. Two young men who were standing by the conveyor approached them. Sammy smiled, “Autumn Leaves! It is me, Sammy. Your favorite cousin!” “You aren’t her favorite,” Joey made a face, pushing himself ahead of his brother, “Everybody knows that Leaves and I go way back!” The two men near thirty hugged her and then started to squabble about who she liked best. She listened a minute and then said, “You guys haven’t changed a bit! You were always a pair of clowns.” Stunned, Sam turned to Joey in mock concern, “What do you think she means by that?” “That we are her favorites! I mean, everybody loves clowns right?” the taller man chuckled. Uncle George raised his eyebrows, “I don’t think so. I think she means you’d better get the girl’s bags to the car. She is mailing the rest so only has two with her. Think you can handle that?” Joey turned to her, “Do you which one is the heaviest, Leaves?” She laughed, “They are both navy blue and weigh the maximum allowed.” “I just knew it,” Sammy groaned. “Old Leaves would do that! Hasn’t changed a bit! I when I got conned into carrying those pails of water for you! I think my back has been bad ever since!” Autumn crossed her eyes, “I’ll give you an aspirin.” Her fair-haired well-built cousin who sported more than a few freckles under his tan, grinned, “Mighty kind of you, Ma’am. Don’t overdo on my .” Joey, who had darker hair but otherwise looked like his brother, watched the bags on the conveyor belt, “Hey Leaves, did it happen to dawn on you that

almost every bag is navy blue?” “There was a sale, I guess,” she shrugged. “Mine have red tassels on them.” “Tassel?” Joey blustered, “Who but you would tassel their bags?” They all looked over to the bags and over half of them had tassels, red ones. “Oh.” He crinkled his brow, “Is there a particular shade of red we should be looking for?” Autumn turned to her aunt, “I might just grab a return flight.” “Sorry, Fallen Leaves,” Sam said, “We get few planes up this way. The next flight out is in January. Isn’t that right, Joey?” “Yah, if they get enough people. Otherwise February.” Uncle George intervened, “Boys, get the girl’s bag and quit bugging her. You aren’t ten anymore.” “Well, I know I am,” Sam boasted, “What about you, Joe?” “Yup, and have been for nearly twenty years!” Auntie Alma whispered to her, “I have a spare bottle I keep in the corn crib. I’ll show you where it is when we get home.” “Thanks. I may need it.” As the men tucked the two heavy bags into the trunk, Joey said, “Hey, Sam said he is buying us a milkshake at the Log House before you head home. Okay?” “Did I do that?” Sam looked puzzled, “Could have sworn that was your voice.” The medium height, balding Uncle George sighed, “That’s what happens when you share a brain, boys. We’ll stop and you two can fight over the bill. I assume you each have your own wheels.” “Yah, we do,” Joey explained. “That’s in case we quit talking to each other.” Autumn crossed her eyes, “You guys are just plain weird.”

“You can ride with me,” Joey offered with a boyish grin. “I have a big pickup.” “She cannot,” Sam reprimanded him, “There is so much junk in the enger seat, you couldn’t get a pigeon in there!” “Now just why in hell would I want a pigeon in my pickup cab?” While those two were bickering, the others got in their car and drove out of the airport parking lot. “You know, Ma,” Uncle George said to his wife, watching his sons in the rearview mirror, “I think we should have quit reproducing after the first couple kids. There was no improvement on the rest, for sure.” “Oh Pa,” Auntie Alma commiserated, “But the striving to produce a good one was the best part.” Autumn started to giggle and soon was in a full-blown laugh. She hadn’t laughed like that in months. She was surprised she still ed how.

Their snack was some French fries with their milk shakes and were actually quite full when they headed home. The boys both had to leave for work and wouldn’t be home for dinner, so they had cheeseburgers with their milkshakes. “We’d love to be home to reminisce, but we have to go earn a living.” Sam pointed out, “Besides, if you rest up, you may be ready to handle us tomorrow.” Joey explained, “Only because we work all night, so we will be worn down.”

The three vehicles headed north on the highway toward Merton after having said goodbye to the young men. “Do they work at the same place?” Autumn asked. “They both work at a power plant, but different ones,” Auntie Alma answered. “They aren’t always that silly, but they’re very glad you were coming out.” “I’m glad to see them. We used to have fun when we were kids.” Autumn looked out the window, “How far away do all your kids live from your place?”

“Well, Linda, of course, lives in Texas with her family. John lives in Illinois and the others all live within six miles or so of us. These two, Joey and Sam, will be home until they get married,” Auntie Alma listed them off. “They will be moving near to where their girls work. They both have to drive to their jobs anyway, so thought this way would be better.” “Now, their fiancées are sisters, right?” “Yes, they are both Fedders. You’ll like them. I think they are about your age and have been exposed to those two knotheads long enough so they understand us,” Uncle George laughed. “It does take a specific kind of mind to accommodate us!” “I can’t believe they still call me Leaves. I hated that so much back then and they thought they were so funny,” the young lady shook her head. “Apparently, they still do.” Uncle George nodded, “Don’t plan on them getting over it. They may not. They call Beth and Bonnie’s brother, who is a priest, Slick. Sometimes I honestly wonder if they even know he is named Bart.” “They know,” Auntie Alma said, “But look at Darrell. If there was anyone who never uses someone’s real name, it is him. In fact, he started the Slick business.” “He is married, too, right?” “Yes. He married Jeannie Frandsen. She is a sweetheart. Eve is married to Mervin Olson, but everyone calls him Chatterbox. That guy has a heart of gold but he talks non-stop. He and our baby Eve make a good couple, because she doesn’t listen. Or if she does, she likely forgets anything the poor man says.” Auntie Alma went on, “Her head is a complete vacuum and no memory!” “One thing about it,” Uncle George grinned, “Everything is always new and exciting to her!” “She can’t be that bad,” Autumn said, “She went to college and has a good job.” “We know. None of us can figure out how that happened.”

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About an hour later, Alma pointed out the sign for Merton. “On this side of town is the Retirement Home. It is very large and takes folks in from all over the state. It is a nice place with a good reputation. And here is our Main Street. It must be what, George? Five blocks long?” “No. I think maybe it’s up to seven or eight.” “We have a Greek Orthodox church and the Catholic church and school here. There is also the public school that our kids attended. Of course, a couple stores and such. We even have a city park. It consists of a water fountain and a bench by that one daisy. Fancy place!” “It seems very nice,” Autumn said mechanically. “Stifle the exuberance, Girl,” Uncle George laughed, “I’d hate to have you get the flutters!” “I thought that Marly’s husband had a church here.” “It is east about five miles,” Alma explained. “Marly asked us to stop in if you aren’t too tired from your flight. We’d like to check on Byron.” “I’m tired, but wound up. I don’t mind stopping. How many kids do they have again?” Autumn asked. “I’m afraid I can’t keep them all straight.” “Me, either,” George moaned. “But one meeting with any of the youngest will no doubt be an indelible impression!” “Oh now George,” Alma said. “They are fine young people.” “Didn’t say they weren’t, just memorable.” “They have five, their four and they are in the process of adopting the youngest girl.”

Autumn would have preferred to just go to her room, but knew they wanted to see them. Besides, they were family, so she almost had to be polite. The three got out of the car at the two-story parish house just north of Trinity Lutheran Church. There was no one around so Autumn hoped no one was home. Once the car door opened, a darting movement was visible from behind the house. Before Autumn could blink twice, there were two little boys about eight years old each carrying shovels standing right by the car. One was blonde, blueeyed with freckles and the other was an Indian boy with black hair and brown eyes. “Hi Grampa,” the tow head said, “Who did you bring to our house?” “I brought your Mom’s cousin, Autumn. She is going to stay with us. Autumn, meet your second cousin, Charlie Ellison.” Autumn extended her hand to the boy, who studied her, “Are you a grownup?” “Kind of,” she smiled. “Are you?” “No, me and CJ are kids yet, but we have lots of jobs. So, we are getting grownup. Do you have a job?” “Not right now,” she answered. “But I am a nurse.” “Do you give shots and that stuff?” “I have done that.” “This here is CJ, my best friend. You can shake his hand if you want.” “I would like that,” she held out her hand to the little boy who wiped it off on his jeans before he shook hers. “Hello. I’m CJ Grey Hawk. I live just over there,” he pointed to the east. “You can come to my house whenever you want. I’ll tell you where we keep the cookies.”

“Well thank you, CJ. That’s very nice of you.” “He knows where all the food is,” Charlie explained. “Me and him always fill our pockets when we go exploring. Do you want to come exploring with us?” “Maybe sometime. I flew in from Atlanta today, so I’m pretty tuckered out.” Charlie frowned, “Do you know how to fly an airplane, too?” “No, I meant I rode on the airplane. Do you know how to fly?” “No, I’m just learning to swim now, but maybe I’ll learn that next week. We have this friend guy who flies a plane. His name is Crandall. Do you know him?” “I don’t believe so.” Autumn answered, “It sounds like he has an exciting job.” CJ added, “When he comes up here, he has his own room at our house. I told him where the cookies are. He was glad to know it.” “Well, boys, we’re going to steal a cup of coffee from your Mom,” Alma said. “You don’t have to steal it. She’ll give it to you. She’s pretty good that way.” Charlie confided. “We’d come in, but me and CJ have to put our shovels away now and take care of our rabbits.” “Maybe you can come see our rabbits later, Miss Otto.” CJ offered. “I think I would like to do that sometime. Likely not today though.” “When you aren’t tired no more, you can call my house and ask for me when you want to, okay?” “Okay, CJ.” With that, the two boys took off at break neck speed carrying their shovels to the tool shed behind the parish. George Jessup looked after them, “They go by the name of the Dynamic Duo.” “I can understand that.”

Marly had opened the door and was coming down the steps to give Autumn a hug. “Welcome to the prairies! It is great to see you.” They exchanged an embrace and Marly invited them in. There was a small, girl with a mop of very dark curly hair, holding the door open. When George and Alma got to the door, the girl who just turned five, gave them a kiss and hug. “Come in, Grampa and Gramma. We have our tea dishes out for you. Mom and I did it.” Alma entered the homey kitchen and looked at the table. It was all set and even had a tablecloth with a vase full of flowers in the middle. “It looks magnificent,” she told the little girl. “Me and Mom picked the flowers from our yard. We wanted to make it ‘specially nice to be welcome.” Then Marly and Autumn came in and Marly introduced them. “This is Autumn Simms, Gopher. She is my cousin from down south. Autumn, this is Miriam, our youngest.” The little girl smiled at her with her big brown eyes and pink cheeks, “Hello.” “Hello, Miriam.” The child quickly corrected her, “I’m not Miriam. I’m Gopher.” “Oh, I’m sorry. I have never met a Gopher before.” “That’s okay,” the girl responded, “I never met you before, too.” Autumn looked at her aunt for understanding and she whispered. “Just call her Gopher. I’ll explain later.” Marly motioned for them to take a seat and then told the little girl, “Gopher, run tell Daddy that our guests are here.” The little girl looked at her Mom, “Should I tell Brett, too?”

“You should. He is with your Dad.” “Okay,” she said as she dashed out of the room. Marly explained, “Brett is playing chess with Byron. Have a seat wherever you are comfortable. I leave this end open so Byron has room for his wheelchair.” “How is my son-in-law doing?” George asked. “Very well, Dad.” The pretty, blonde, middle-aged housewife explained, “He has been fortunate to have Pepper and Chris nearby so they can do his physical therapy every day. That has helped a lot. His balance is still unsteady, but it is improving. If he is going just a short ways, he can walk with his walker. Otherwise, he is relegated to his wheelchair, which he hates.” “Is he still itching to get back to work?” “Yes, but Marv… Oh, I’m sorry Autumn, Pastor Marv Olson is Byron’s associate at the church… has been sending him some folks to counsel with. That takes time and that’s what Byron has. It works out well for everyone.” “Good,” George approved, “I’d hate to have him get rusty.” “When did they remove the tumor?” Autumn asked. “About two weeks ago. It was a meningioma, or however you say it.” “You said it right,” Autumn acknowledged. “I’m glad he is doing well. Some can be quite nasty.” “It sure was before they removed it,” Marly agreed. “We’re very thankful they were able to get it all. His vision is only slightly impaired. He got his new glasses. I think he looks distinguished.” “No, I don’t,” the middle-aged Pastor, Byron Ellison, interrupted as he entered the room, “I look like Old Four Eyes!” “Wait until you get landed with bifocals,” George laughed. “You can’t whine until then.”

A tall, nice looking man in his early twenties wheeled Byron to the table, “Hello, where do you want him parked, Marly?” “Here at this end,” she smiled and motioned. “Hi Brett,” Alma grinned, “We just picked up my niece from down south. Brett Schauer this is Autumn Simms.” Brett reached over and shook her hand, “Pleased to meet you, Miss Simms.” “Call me Autumn, please.” “You can call me Brett, Autumn.” “Hi Autumn,” Byron stretched out his hand to shake hers. “Marly is so excited to have you us on the prairies. How was your trip?” “Very good, but long. Layovers are dreadful.” “Yes, they certainly can be.” Byron agreed, “Well, Pa and Ma will let you rest up… for what? Ten minutes before George works you to the bone.” “No, I won’t.” George replied, “She’ll be all finished with her resting by the time we get to the house. Heavens to Betsy, she has been sitting all the way from Bismarck! And what about you, my son? Instead of lolling around here you could be putting down new flooring or something.” “Right after you fix up Ma’s kitchen. Have you started on that yet?” “Stifle it, you two!” Alma groaned. “What Brett must think!” “Don’t mind me,” Brett chuckled, “Have you ever heard Carl talk?” Byron added, “You’re right, Brett. That man is really something!” Marly explained to Autumn, “Brett lives and works on Dan and Jen’s farm. He also works as a high line man and a karate and judo instructor.” “Not to mention,” Byron continued, “He makes some mean barbequed ribs.” “Really?” Autumn smiled, “A Renaissance man?”

“No. I just get bored easily.” Brett said as he pulled Gopher’s chair up beside him and helped her sit on it. “All set?” Gopher beamed, “Yes, I am. Thank you, Mr. Brett.” He patted her curly head and grinned, “Will you be having tea or milk today?” Marly answered, “Mostly milk with a little coffee on top.” Gopher nodded, “Like Mommy said, but a cookie, too.” Autumn watched as the young man held the plate of cookies for the little girl to pick out her favorite. He reminded her so much of Brad. Brad was a grade school teacher and had a wonderful way with children. He always said he wanted a houseful. Unless that was another lie. The conflicting memories clouded her present with confusion. “–do you think, Autumn?” Uncle George was asking. “I’m sorry, I was lost in thought. What did you say?” “I asked if you thought you might want to take karate or judo?” “Oh, I doubt it. I’m not the athletic type.” “It’s free,” Uncle George explained. “Of course, you have to put up with this numbskull for a teacher.” Brett grinned, “Or your Uncle George can teach you. I’m sure he was around when it was invented.” “Never did like you much,” George laughed. “So, how is Rain doing?” “Much better. Carl and Mo took her in to the doctors to be checked out after getting buried in that landslide. Nothing was broken except her little finger, but she did have a cracked shin and a couple of cracked ribs. She is in a lot of pain and has a big gash on her leg. I bet there isn’t an inch of her that isn’t black and blue!” Brett shook his head, “She is still in enough pain so that she just sleeps, but poor Mo is going to have a time when she feels better!”

“Amen to that,” Byron said. “Lightnin is even more of a go-getter than I, and I sure hate being tied down.” “I love you to death, son,” George said, “But that little girl does more in a morning than you do in a week.” “You might just be right about that, but she is half my age.” Byron agreed, “How many days ago was that landslide?” “Four.” Brett answered, “Zach says she can start getting up in a couple days. She wanted to sit up in bed last night, but she just couldn’t take it. She is so doggone stubborn, she tried to do it anyway, but finally had to give in.” “It’s going to be difficult for her. I bet she is having a fit she can’t work with Kid,” Marly replied, and then looked at Autumn. “I’m so sorry. I need to explain what we are talking about. That was rude of us. Rain is actually Lorraine Harrington and lives with her grandparents, Carl and Mo Kincaid. She works as Carl and Darrell’s farmhand and with another neighbor, Kid, in his auto body shop.” “Darrell Jessup?” Autumn asked. “My cousin?” “Yes, Darrell and this Carl are partners,” Alma explained. “And of course, Darrell called her Lightnin and it stuck.” “How old is this Lightnin?” “Nineteen,” Brett answered and then added with pride, “She and I are going together.” “Officially?” Auntie Alma asked. “Well of course, you wombat,” Uncle George said, “How would you go with someone unofficially?” “I’ve seen it done,” Alma stared back. “When did you two make it official?” “We made it official, while she was buried under two and a half feet of dirt and rock!” Brett laughed.

“I have to hand it to you, young man,” George chuckled, “I never was that desperate, but if it worked out- hey! Good on you!” “George, can you be nice?” Alma frowned. “That’s okay, Mrs. Jessup,” Brett nodded. “He is almost right. I think we could have handled it in a less dramatic way, but whatever works. She had to promise to go with me or I wouldn’t dig her out!” “And they think I had a brain tumor!” Byron rolled his eyes, “Have you made any plans on what you would like to do while you’re here, Autumn?” “No. Nothing yet. I want to unwind a bit and then maybe decide, if that’s okay with Auntie Alma and Uncle George. Of course, I’ll be helping out at their place.” “In about a week she’ll know,” George determined. “She needs to get her ducks in a row.” “Pa,” Marly frowned at her father, “There is no rush. She doesn’t need to line up her ducks that soon.” “Uncle George, first I have to round up my ducks before I get that far!” Autumn pointed out. Little Gopher couldn’t stand it anymore, “Miss Autumn, I know where your ducks might be. Us gophers have a bunch over at the Patch. You can come over and see if yours are there, too.” Autumn looked at her as if she was talking a foreign language, but Byron rescued her. “The children at the neighborhood babysitters have about a hundred and fifty ducks. All the kids are called gophers, but our little Gopher is the only one who uses that name! They all dig a lot, so that is why Carl calls them that. He and Mo are the babysitters and they have a huge sign out front of their place that says, The Petunia Patch.” “You can’t miss it,” George explained. “It sits in the middle of a huge field of petunias.” “Were these people teachers or something?” Autumn asked.

“No,” Alma laughed, “Mo is a natural mom and grandmother, but Carl is a retired FBI agent.” Autumn looked lost a minute, “Auntie Alma, don’t forget to show me the way to that bottle in the corn crib.”

After visiting for a while, the group dispersed. Brett was off to do chores and Jessups were taking their houseguest home. On the way, Alma pointed out where her other cousins lived. Carrie’s house was about half mile from Marly’s. Only quarter of a mile later, was the turn to go to Jen’s place where that Brett lived and then they ed that Petunia Patch. There must have been almost an acre of petunias between the house and the road. Autumn didn’t think she had ever seen so many petunias in one spot before in her life. They were right, one couldn’t miss it. They traveled a mile further and turned north. They ed her cousin Darrell’s place and then went on a few more miles east to their home.

3-

Jessup’s farmhouse was unusual. Most of the farmhouses in the area were the traditional two story homes, usually with painted wood siding. Jessups however had a partial split-level. “I call it an unintentional split-level,” George bragged. “It was designed out of necessity way before the designers had a name for it.” The main floor was ground level and as most homes in the region, it sat on a full basement. Inside was a massive kitchen and then one huge room, which served as a dining-living room. Opposite the kitchen end, there was a split staircase. Up from the living room was the master bedroom and to the right was a guest bedroom, sewing room and a den or office. Up another set of stairs, were more bedrooms and bathrooms sitting over more bedrooms that were down from the living room. Down another staircase on the other side of the kitchen were the other bedrooms and a couple bathrooms, divided by a long hallway. Since Jessups had nine children and one grandchild living with them when they moved there, they used every room. Presently, the only permanent residents were George, Alma, Sammy, Joey and now, Autumn. Autumn was shown to her room. It had a large window, since the rooms were only half way into the ground, with flowers that seemed as if they were in a window box, but were, in reality, part of a flowerbed in the back yard. It was very pretty. It was a generously-sized room with a small bathroom attached. Autumn looked at her aunt quizzically, “Are all your rooms this large?” “Oh no. This one is the biggest, but when we moved here, we used it for Marly and baby Kenny. Now we can spread out!” The kindly, round and cuddly woman smiled, “Pa is wrestling with the suitcases, so I’m going to run help him!” “Let me come, too. He can’t be hauling them!” When the women got to the front door, they were met with a surprise. Darrell, Jessup’s youngest son, and another man were carrying the bags in while George

held the door open. “Look who came into the yard just in time?” George beamed. “Where do you want these, Ma?” Darrell asked as they manhandled the huge bags into the house. “What have you got in here, Cousin? Concrete?” Autumn giggled, “No. Bricks.” “I’m pretty sure you are right.” Darrell set down the bag he was carrying and gave his cousin a hug, “I’m sure you don’t me. I was just a little tyke when we left Arkansas.” “You haven’t changed much!” Autumn laughed, “I would recognize those freckles anywhere!” The young dairyman grinned, “I’ll take that as a compliment. You, on the other hand, have changed. You were a gawky thing as I recall.” “I hope I changed for the better,” she made a face. He studied her, and then nodded with a grin, “A bit of improvement, I’d say!” She swatted him and he laughed, “This is my friend Matt Harrington. Matt, my cousin Autumn Simms.” “Hello, Autumn. That is a pretty name.” the thirty-one year old lean fellow smiled to her, “You don’t look a bit gawky to me!” “Thanks,” she felt a bit embarrassed. “I’d fall in the dowdy category.” “Nope, you can’t,” Auntie Alma winked, “That’s mine! All mine!” “You can stand here whining about how you look, but just know, I’m darned good looking and always have been!” Uncle George announced. Darrell rolled his eyes, “Which room, Ma?” “Marly’s old room.” He nodded and then said to Matt, “This way, Tonto. When we drop these off, I’m pretty sure my Ma will have a cup of coffee for us.”

When the men came back to the kitchen, Alma had coffee. George set the mugs on the table and thanked them for taking the bags down to her room. “Too bad we didn’t have more time to pilfer through them,” Darrell teased. “We’re here on business. Dad, we’ll be moving the combines over to your oat field tomorrow morning. It’s ready to go and we have a crew. So, my wonderful Mommy, whom I love ever so dearly, could I ask you to make one of your delicious lunches for us at noon tomorrow. You know how we all love your cooking.” Alma looked at him, unimpressed, “You are so full of malarkey! Of course, I’ll cook! I have an assistant now!” Darrell grumped, “Ma, I don’t want Autumn to cook. She only knows how to make mud pies! When I was little, she fed me at least seven pounds of dirt!” Autumn giggled, “You and Eve were the only ones who ever ate them! Everyone else knew enough to pretend eat them!” “That’s not very nice.” Darrell leaned back, “I was only eating them so you wouldn’t cry.” “Very kind of you!” Darrell grumped, “Well, you used up that quota. I don’t have to be nice to you anymore!” “Does that mean you won’t eat any more of my mud pies?” “You put chocolate on them, and he will.” Matt laughed, his bright blue eyes twinkling, “Count on it!” Autumn looked toward her aunt, “Is anyone up here normal?” The four responded in unison, “We all are!” George shook his head, “So, when do all your guests start arriving for the cookout? You’re having a camp out before then, right?” “No,” Matt explained. “The cookout is still scheduled for weekend after next,

but the camp out is delayed. Boyds won’t be here for a couple weeks. Kathleen’s family decided to wait for the wedding, so they won’t be coming now.” “Oh, there’ll only be the cookout people here then,” George grinned. “There are a bunch coming for that, huh? You’ll have a houseful.” Darrell nodded, “Lightnin’s parents will be staying at our place, of course.” “There will be people all over,” Matt grinned. “Seems everyone thinks they are a chef!” “Hey Autumn, you should enter your mud pies!” Darrell chortled, “You might win, since no one else will be in that category!” “I might be hitchhiking back home by then,” Autumn frowned. “I can see coming here to be with my cousins might have been a big mistake.” “I could have warned you,” Darrell laughed, “But you wouldn’t have listened anyway. Seriously, my wife Jeannie and Diane, the best half of Matt’s team, will be over tomorrow morning to help with the meal. I think we will have a crew of about fourteen or so.” “How is the harvest looking?” George asked. “Better than we thought. The oats has headed out well and the other crops look good, except Olson’s corn. Chatterbox said he is making all his field corn into silage this year.” The men talked of the crops before going home, “We have the girls and Josh and Joallyn milking. So, if we value our lives, we better help out.” Darrell said and grinned at his cousin, “Ever feel the urge to milk a goat, let us know. We have a bunch we line up twice a day. You can have your pick!” “Gee thanks.” Autumn nodded, “But I had hoped to hide out here.” “Good luck, Autumn,” Matt said, “I was going to do that, too. Within six months, I owned a dog, two cats, two horses and had a girlfriend! It was all this dude’s fault!” “You’re welcome! And I’m damned proud of it!” Darrell boasted, as he winked

to his cousin, “He’s never had it so good.”

After the men left, Auntie Alma sent Autumn to unpack while she and Uncle George put the dinner on the table from the oven. Autumn was amazed at how many people she had met in this wilderness since she arrived! As she pulled on her blue jeans and a tee shirt, she thought, “Maybe I’ll have to hitchhike out of here!’ Over a quiet dinner, Autumn asked her hosts, “Now why is it that sweet little girl wants to be called Gopher, of all things?” “Her Mom and Dad were extremely abusive parents.” Uncle George began, “Her father was a criminal and her mother was insane. They used to leave their kids anywhere with God knows who. Sometimes the kids were left with thieves, addicts, prostitutes, or pimps, no matter. One time Miriam was left in a crib with her dead brother for at least a day. Their mom had bashed his head in.” “Oh dear God,” Autumn nearly gagged. “We know little about her life. When her parents were finally apprehended,” Alma went on, “Her father was shot to death and her mother committed suicide. Miriam was shot by her father in the fray, and would have died had not that FBI agent, Carl of the Petunia Patch, leapt atop her. The poor little kid, just about three at the time.” George continued, “So in the hospital while healing from her gunshot, the doctors began to piece together what had been going on. She was malnourished and terrified. Whenever anyone talked to her, she would say, ‘If you want to,’ for fear of being beaten again. She curled up into the fetal position at the slightest sign of any controversy.” “How did she get to Marly?” “Miriam’s aunt Ruthie was living with them then. Zach is her uncle, but since Zach is a doctor and works in Bismarck, it only made sense for Miriam to stay at Marly and Byron’s with Ruthie. It was a struggle, but the little one slowly began to recover and become the sweet little girl you see today. She’s had some serious problems from time to time, but is much better. Her psychiatrist thinks that since her life was hell while she was Miriam and good since she became one of the gophers, she prefers to be called Gopher.”

“Why did Byron and Marly adopt her if she has an aunt and uncle here?” “Her psychiatrist wanted the girl to be in a family with kids her age. When Ruthie married Ian—” “I thought her husband’s name was Zach?” “No, that is Ruthie’s brother, Ian is her husband. Anyway, she just stayed with Byron and Marly since she thinks of that as her home. No one wants to upset her little life any more than she has already been through. When Byron was hospitalized with this brain tumor, she freaked because the doctor said his children could come to visit him. She was certain that she’d never get to see him because she wasn’t his ‘forever kid’ and didn’t have a paper that said she was. She meant adoption papers. So, they started the paperwork for her. Ruthie and Zach have no issues with it and so it should be completed soon.” “Wow! Makes my problems look miniscule in comparison,” Autumn mumbled. “How are things going for you?” Uncle George asked. “I know it must have been a terrible time for you. You know Marly faced a similar thing when her first husband was killed in Korea. I’m sure she would be glad to talk to you about it.” “Thanks, but right now, I don’t even want to think about things.” Autumn took a deep breath, “I just want to coast for a while.” “I can understand that.” Auntie Alma smiled, “Anytime, day or night, just know we are here to listen. Okay? Until then, coast. Of course, know that when you coast, the hill usually isn’t as long as you hope. It will soon come to an end and then you’ll need to start pedaling again!” “Yes, I do know, Auntie Alma. I do know.”

4-

It was only eight that evening, when Autumn’s aunt and uncle retired to their room. She was glad to head off to her room, too. She had only unpacked a change of clothes and thought she might get the rest of her things put away before a bath and bed. She hadn’t packed a lot, since they were sending most of her things in boxes. She brought a couple nice things and the rest were everyday clothes. Her mom had insisted that she brought a few dressier clothes, since they had no idea what she might need. Autumn knew. She didn’t need anything more than jeans and a top. She had no intention of going anywhere. She had to it that she did feel grim in that beige pants suit. It was very drab and made her feel even more miserable. The bit of visiting she had done made her smile and laugh more than she had in months. She knew that because she had done little but mourn and moan since that fateful day. As she was putting her underwear in the drawers that her aunt had readied for her, she ed how jubilant she had been just a few short months before. ‘What an idiot,’ she scolded herself. ‘You really believed that you had the world by the tail. All the studying, saving, waiting, and denying yourself was about to pay off. This was the goal that everyone wanted to achieve. In just a few days, you thought it would all be yours.’ In her heart, she always believed the only reason other folks didn’t achieve their goals was because they hadn’t been prepared to keep their noses to the grindstone. Boy, did she learn a lesson. As she slid the empty suitcases into the back of the closet, she grabbed her toiletries and pajamas to head to her bathroom. She debated about a shower, but settled on a long, hot, relaxing bath. While she was filling the tub, she unpacked her lotions, toothpaste, and other toiletries. When she saw the new bottles of perfumed skin softener, she could no longer contain her tears. Just looking at the tiny Hawaiian plumeria on the label of the bottle was all it took. That had been Brad’s favorite fragrance and she wore it all the time for him. In fact, they had ordered pink plumeria from Hawaii for their wedding flowers. She wondered whatever happened to them.

Now she was sitting in a strange bathroom in a strange place weeping over the delicate scent. The young woman was certain that the last fragments of her sanity were gone. She wondered if the idea of a new start here was a good one. After crying a bit, she noticed the water was up to the overflow in the tub and turned it off. She decided against putting the plumeria-scented bubble bath in the tub. That would be just too much. Instead, she got into the tub and washed up with her aunt’s Jergens bar soap. It was nice and smelled good, but not like the plumeria. After scrubbing off the traveler’s scum, she rested in the tub and let the warm water relax her body. It felt good. She closed her eyes to relax and as soon as her eyes closed, the screen in her mind began to replay that horrible day.

***

She had dressed for the last day of her orientation at her new job. Then she would have a break until after the wedding. She had attended orientations and meetings that week and was anxious to actually have time in the Emergency Room where she would be working when she began her job in earnest. She went to the third floor where the new employees were to meet that morning. The head nurse showed them to their lockers, give them their keys, and took them on a more in-depth tour of the facility before lunch. They had lunch with the chief-of-staff and the hospital . After lunch, she went to the emergency room. She would be working triage with another nurse, instead of with a doctor. Since triage was the assessing the priority of the severity of the patient’s conditions before sending them for specialized care, it was a very good starting place. She could become familiar with the various doctors and department protocols.

Her parents and Brad’s family had driven in the day before for the wedding. Brad’s brother was driving into Atlanta that morning with the U Haul stuffed with the things for the apartment. The fathers and her brothers would help them

unpack when they arrived. Hopefully, their new apartment would be at least livable when they returned from their honeymoon. After work, she would see her new home for the first time! She could hardly contain her excitement. She and Brad had gone together for several years. They had the same goals, beliefs, and backgrounds. They were truly kindred spirits. Everyone said they made a great couple and belonged together. He had fair hair, blue eyes, and was about five-eleven, while she was a five-foot five brunette. They even looked like they belonged together. It was destiny. This was the way things were supposed to be. She was realistic enough to know that there was no perfect life, but she felt that she had come very close. There had been little doubt from the beginning of their romance where it would end. It just seemed understood that they would marry, even their families seemed to always know. In fact, neither could if there was ever a moment when Brad actually asked her to marry him. It was just one day, he gave her a ring and they set the date. It was what they wanted and felt it was God’s will. They both went to the same church and were strong in their Christian faith. They knew if you believed in anything with all your heart, the Lord would provide. Certainly, one had to work at it and be faithful to it, but it would all come to fruition in good time. Brad graduated the year before her and landed a great job in Atlanta. He shared a room with a fellow teacher that year, while looking for the right apartment for them. He had just signed the two-year lease on their place the week before. Her parents had brought things down and set them in the new apartment. However, they were all staying with friends until after the wedding and didn’t move any of the wedding paraphernalia over there, making their friend’s home the control center. Brad would be staying with his family at an uncle’s place until after the wedding. An elegant luncheon at Willow Gardens, and other wedding festivities would all be held at the Gardens. Later the couple would leave for the airport to Rio de Janeiro for their honeymoon.

That morning she was so excited she could hardly wait to get into her new uniform, pin on her new nametag and her shiny RN pin, and slip into her new nurse’s shoes, which hadn’t even been broken in yet. It was the beginning of

reaping what they had been diligently been sowing and tending to for a lifetime. When her father dropped her off at the hospital, she hugged him goodbye. “This is the day I’ve been waiting for my whole life! From now on, everything will be great. Isn’t it wonderful?” Her dad smiled as he returned her hug, “Yes, I’m very happy for you, but calm down sweetheart. Nothing will always be perfectly wonderful, you know.” “I do know, Father, but this is the beginning of my grownup life with Brad. We’ll be starting out on a magnificent life.” She smiled, “With God’s blessings, I know that no matter what comes up, we’ll be able to handle it together.” Her father chuckled, “Enjoy it, girl, and cherish these moments.”

***

Today, she hated even thinking about it. It made her sick and bitter. She wondered if her father had a foreboding that morning. Maybe she had jinxed the events of the day by being too happy. She would never do that again. The bath water was beginning to cool off, so she clambered out of the tub. She dried off and without a thought began to slather the plumeria body lotion on her legs. Once the fragrance drifted to her nostrils, she stopped. It took all her strength to keep from wailing, but she muffled her cries in the bath towel. After a couple minutes she pulled herself back together. She pulled her cotton pajamas on and washed her face again. She fumbled her bottle of sleeping pills open and took two. She had promised her Mother she would ease off them but decided that since today was the first day in her new home, she needed a rest. She needed to sleep tonight. She’d ease off tomorrow. In bed, she covered herself with the soft blankets and from her pillows could look out the large window. The moon was bright enough so she could see the flowers outside her window. Beyond the flowerbed was a lawn that butted up to the several rows of trees her uncle called a windbreak. It was very picturesque

and almost idyllic. She frowned to herself, “Yes. I really understand idyllic, don’t I?” She went to the window and pulled the shade down so she didn’t have to see it. Comfortable with the dark, she turned over in her bed and pulled the covers over her shoulders, nearly covering her head. Inside her cocoon-like wrappings, she was able to close her eyes. She forced herself to think about that little Gopher girl to keep from thinking about herself. Before long, her sleep medication had taken over and she was asleep.

5-

Autumn was restless by the time she awoke fully. It took her a minute to where she was. She heard a shower running and wondered if it was morning already. She peeked out of her swaddling of blankets and surveyed the room. Carefully, she untangled herself and got out of bed. She couldn’t find the clock, but opened the window shade. It was obviously still the middle of the night. She leaned on the windowsill and gazed over the peaceful landscape. It was much nicer than she had imagined from the airplane. After realizing it was likely Sammy and Joey coming home from work, she wandered around her room. She heard the shower turn off and decided to go back to bed. On her way, she found the Baby Ben clock sitting on top of her dresser. She moved it over to her bedside table. It was only three-thirty in the morning, but now she was wide-awake and certain she wouldn’t sleep. She looked for her wristwatch which was set for Atlanta local time, an hour later. What would she do wandering around in the middle of the night? The young visitor knew herself well enough to know she could be in the pits of despair before daybreak if she operated true to form. It was too late to take another sleeping pill, but she wouldn’t be able to ward off a major fit of anguish without something. Then she ed the tranquilizers were in her purse. However, she had left her purse in the kitchen on the main floor. She could feel her stomach becoming jumpy and slipped on her bedroom slippers to go find her purse. She quietly went up the half flight of steps to the main room. The light over the stove guided her way. As soon as she entered the room, she smelled the fresh coffee. ‘These folks drink more coffee than anyone I’ve ever met.’ She found her purse on the end of the sofa where she had left it. She took it with her to the kitchen counter and rummaged through it. She found her tranquilizers and took a couple with water. The aroma of freshly perked coffee got the best of her. She set the pill bottle by her purse and began her search for a coffee mug.

She ed there was mug tree near the coffee pot. She found it and all but a couple mugs were hanging on it. She looked over the mismatched collection and saw a hot pink one. She deduced it must have been Eve’s, since she had noticed that Auntie Alma had one that proclaimed ‘World’s Best Grandma’ on it. She filled the pink mug with hot coffee and then wandered over to the patio door. The Southern woman quietly slid the door open and let herself out. She meandered around the large patio in her soft cotton pajamas and then found a comfortable rattan chair. She dropped her slippers from her feet and curled her legs up under her inside the chair. She leaned back to enjoy the quiet with her humungous mug of coffee in both hands, enjoying the peaceful yard. In a couple minutes, a large whitish-yellow dog with a slight limp ambled over toward her. The dog sniffed her and then apparently decided that she was not a threat. It moved over to a thick mat and stretched out. She smiled, “I see I have a protector. Where were you when I needed you?” She had only taken a few sips from her coffee when she heard a vehicle come up the gravel road to the farm and slow it’s speed to turn in. It went to a building across from the house where Uncle George had parked. The dog raised its head, listened, and then put its head back down. Apparently, the person who had arrived belonged there. At first, Autumn was going to make a mad dash for her room, but the door to the house opened before she could get her legs untangled. ‘I’ll sit here quietly. No doubt, whoever it is will be anxious to go off to bed before they notice I’m up.’ She curled her legs back under her again and tried to melt into the background until that person went off to bed. It shouldn’t take too long, after working all night. It was only minutes later when the patio door slid open and she was found out. She peeked around the edge of the chair. Joey nodded and asked quietly, “Hoping you’d get away with it?” “Get away with what?” she panicked, wondering if he was a mind reader. “Stealing,” he said as he came over to where her.

“What? I didn’t steal… I mean that’s my purse… what?” she stammered. He grimaced, “Lady, you’re holding the evidence in plain sight!” “All I have is my coffee mug.” He corrected her, “My coffee mug.” “Joey, it’s hot pink!” “That is it. It is my pink mug.” She looked at the mug and frowned, “You have a pink mug?” “I did. Looks like you glommed on to it.” “Gee,” she wagged her head and handed it toward him, “Here. I wouldn’t want to stand between a man and his pink mug.” “You can use it this time, since you got girl germs all over it,” he grinned. “You won’t do it again, will you?” “Dunno,” she giggled, “I just might.” “I’ll find you a good one of your very own,” Joey offered with the caveat, “Then you can leave mine alone.” “What is it about this cup that you like so much? I thought since it was pink that it might have been Eve’s.” “No, she had a striped one with circles on it. She took it with her when she and Chatterbox got married. She always said they were hula hoops, but I think that was only in her mind. They looked like circles to me.” Autumn winced, “You put a lot of thought into this subject, I see.” “Leaves! Coffee mugs are important! You have to get the right one with the right fit. Everyone has their favorite.” “Do you like this one because it is pink?”

“I can fit my whole hand in the handle. Most are too small.” She looked at the cup, “Yes, it is a large handle.” “I know. Just don’t break it, okay Leaves?” “I’ll try not to.” “There’s one up there with ladybugs all over it. You might like that one.” “Why?” The young woman was perplexed. “Oh, ladybugs are good luck in Asia.” “We aren’t in Asia.” “I think it works all over.” He went to sit across from her but almost tripped over the dog who hadn’t moved a muscle. “Gladys, please move a mite?” “Gladys? Who names a dog Gladys?” “Us guys.” Joey answered nonchalantly, “We love our good old Gladys.” “What kind is she?” “Old.” Autumn giggled, “Don’t you ever get serious?” “Yup, but it isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.” He looked at his younger cousin, “So, is that what you’re doing? Sitting here being serious?” She shrugged slightly, “I guess I am. I couldn’t sleep.” “So thought you’d guzzle my huge mug full of coffee. That seems logical.” “Well, what do you have to say for yourself? You should be going to bed and instead you are drinking coffee!” “Sammy made it.”

“What has that got to do with it?” “Whoever gets home first, makes coffee.” Oblivious to the fact it neither answered the question nor made any sense, he continued, “That’s how I knew you were up. His cup was in the sink and mine was gone. Anyone who has been here longer than ten minutes would never take my cup. Besides, Gladys usually meets me when I put my pickup away.” “I imagine she is looking for the pigeons in your cab.” “That Sammy isn’t hooked together right, you know.” Joey became more serious, “Okay, really. Why is our Old Leaves sitting out here in the dark?” “Oh, just enjoying the morning. How soon will the sun come up?” “In about an hour or so. Up here the sun comes up sooner, I guess. You know, like in Alaska, it’s up all night. What are you thinking about while waiting for the sun to come up? Something deep? Or private?” “No, actually I was wondering about massive landslides.” “Landslides? Ye gads girl, did you put booze in my mug?” “No. We met this Brett at Marly’s. He said this storm girl was buried in a landslide.” Joey laughed quietly, “Brett Schauer. The girl is Rain, but everyone calls her Lightnin. Rain was injured in a landslide, but not a massive one.” “I didn’t know there were landslides in North Dakota.” “There’s not, really. It is just that this Shale Hill out in one of the pastures, is mostly a big gravel and shale pile with a little sod on top. When it rained, the water got inside the hill and made the gravel unstable. We had been over helping them fence it off before it totally let go, but then it started to rain real hard and we all went home. Rain worried about the calves sliding down the hill, she took off back over there to watch out for them. She and her horse were at the bottom of the hill, when another big chunk of it gave way. It covered her in mud, stone, and gravel. Brett figured that was where she was, so he found her and dug her out.”

“So, they are a couple.” “Yes. They met this spring and have had a stormy time.” “Is that why she’s called Lightnin?” “No, because Darrell named her that because she has one speed-fast.” “Oh. Cousin Darrell. What does he call his wife?” “Jeannie.” She frowned, “Huh?” “Yah, go figure. You know, Darrell and Eve are the youngest of my siblings and neither of them would give Einstein a run for his money. Nice people, but shall we say, lacking.” “You’re awful.” “I know, huh?” Joey leaned back, “That’s why I’m so glad I met my Beth. She likes me and that’s all that matters.” “Don’t count on that,” Autumn let slip before she realized she said it. As soon as the words left her lips, she could have died. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t say that. I’m sure she is wonderful.” “I think so.” Joey cocked his head to one side, and asked very comionately, “Do you want to talk about it?” “No. I don’t know why I said that.” “I think you do, but no matter. If you ever want to talk about it, I’m a pretty good listener. I don’t spread tales without permission, sorta like a priest.” She giggled, “You? A priest?” “It’s not that funny,” he feigned indignation. “I could be one. I know a lot of them.” “Oh, that’s right. Your fiancée’s brother is one.” Autumn thought, “I’ve never

talked to one, I don’t think. I mean, like socially.” “Didn’t Darrell and Matt come over tonight?” “Yes, why? They aren’t priests. I know Darrell isn’t and I got the idea that Matt is married.” “He is, now, but he was a Catholic priest.” “Really? He must have done something awful to get kicked out, huh?” “No, he left because someone else did something awful. He didn’t get kicked out, he left. He is one of the nicest, kindest folks you’ll ever meet,” Joey answered calmly, but firmly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.” “No worries.” The young heavy equipment operator patted the old dog, “Sometimes, it isn’t a good idea to be too quick to judge others. A guy can up some real fine people that way.” “I didn’t mean to.” She shrugged, “I’m a lousy judge of character anyway.” “Excuse me for saying this, but that doesn’t sound like it fits.” “Fits what?” “If I may, I had always heard you and Brad had a wonderful relationship.” “We did. Who said I was talking about Brad?” “Not you, for sure,” Joey caught her eye, “But folks usually don’t talk that away unless they’ve been hurt by someone they care about.” “No. It’s just my mood.” Autumn took a drink of her coffee, “I heard there will be a lot of people here for lunch. I really didn’t think I’d see many folks up this way.” Joey chuckled, “There is a group of us who share our fieldwork. It goes faster that way and we each don’t have to own all the kinds of equipment. I mean some of these machines are very expensive. Besides, most of us have other work

besides farming.” “I’ve seen photos of old threshing bees, or whatever they were called.” “I guess that might be where it started. Anyway, once you meet these folks, you will see them all the time, either working, or at dances, weddings, funerals, or the cookout! Have you heard about that yet?” “Darrell told me I should enter my mud pies!” Joey laughed, “I those! I can’t believe you got Darrell and Eve to actually eat them!” She said slyly, “Want to know my secret? I put a real strawberry on top.” “Why Autumn Leaves, I do believe I’ve encountered a seamy side of your nature! I didn’t know you had one!” She stared at her cup without even a slight smile, “Oh, I do.” Joey considered her and realized she had something that was eating her alive, he reached her hand, “Autumn, seriously, whatever you say is between us. You have always been my friend and I will honor that. Okay?” She cast him a frightened glance, “It’s nothing, Joey. Really. I’m being grim this morning. In fact, I have been little but grim lately. Don’t let your imagination runaway with you.” “I can understand your sadness, but don’t try to buffalo the buffalo hunter. I promise I won’t bug you about it, but if you think you want to air it out, I’m here. Maybe then you won’t need to take those pills.” “What?” She sat up in a defensive posture, “Did you snoop in my purse?” “I didn’t think your pills were a secret since you left then on the counter by the sink, dingbat. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. A lot of folks need something to get them over a loss.” “Mother wants me to quit them.”

“It is probably a good idea before long. Did you see a doctor in Georgia?” “Yes. He said that he would give me only one refill. This is my last one.” She turned her tear-filled eyes to her cousin, “What am I going to do then?” “I think you need to see another doctor. I know a couple. Zach Jeffries is a family friend. He is a pediatrician, but he takes care of all of us.” “Is he the uncle to that rodent?” “Rodent?” Joey crinkled his face. “Yah, you know that little girl of Marly and Byron’s.” “You mean Gopher? Yah, that’s his niece.” Joey nodded with a laugh, “And then there’s Dr. Samuels, her psychiatrist. He has helped a lot of us.” “I’m not crazy!” She snapped defiantly. “Why do you think I’m crazy?” “Goll, I don’t! He sees a lot of folks who are suffering a loss. That’s doesn’t mean you are crazy. Word of warning, if you’re so defensive, folks might wonder.” “I don’t think I like our conversation. I’m going to bed now.” She stated and started to uncurl her feet from under her. Joey was taken back, “Autumn, I’m very sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I don’t think you are crazy or need a psychiatrist. Honest.” She stopped and stared at him for a full minute before she relaxed, “No, Joe. It is me who is sorry. You’re right. I should see a counselor. I just can’t seem to get past some of this stuff. You know, I walked out of my brand new job that day and never returned. Dad had to take my keys and stuff back to the hospital. I tried once, but couldn’t make it through the door.” Joey stood and hugged his cousin, “I can’t imagine what you went through, but please, forgive me. I tend to talk without thinking. I really want us to be friends and to help you in any way I can.” “Thanks, Joey. I appreciate that,” Autumn nodded. “Maybe in a couple days you

could help me find a counselor to talk to. I’ll need to do that. I only have a week’s worth of pills left, so I better get on it.” “I’ll do that.” “Could I ask you to keep this between us?” “Not a problem, but only if you keep your mitts off my pink mug.” “That’s a deal I can live with.” The two were just thinking about going in when they saw the lights go on in the kitchen. “Ma’s up,” Joey smiled. “We better go in.” “Why does she get up this early? It can’t be later than four!” “It is four-thirty,” Joey looked at his watch. “Bet you a quarter that she’s going to mix up some bread dough, so it can raise before lunch.” “At four-thirty?” “Ever noticed when bakers get to the bakery?” “Can’t say that I have.”

6-

The young folks came in the sliding patio door and Auntie Alma turned to smile at them, “Morning Gang! You are up before the crack of dawn!” “Yes, I got home a bit ago and discovered Fallen Leaves had absconded with my coffee mug. I had to track her down,” Joey tattled. “Gladys and I managed to corner her before she got too far!” “That must have been a sight!” his mom answered not paying much attention. “It was like something out of Dragnet,” Joey explained dramatically. “Gladys had her surrounded and was holding her until I could apprehend her.” “Sorry I missed that!” “It had a good ending, though,” Joey continued. “She claims she didn’t know it was mine. Being the kind soul that I am, I offered her the ladybug one for her very own. We still have it, don’t we?” “I don’t know, Superman.” His mom shook her head, “Reach up on the top shelf and see if you can find it. I hope he didn’t drive you bats, Autumn. He’s hard to take when a person is wide awake, but in the middle of the night, it’s almost too much!” “He was okay,” Autumn smiled. “Quite nice, in his own way.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” Joey took offense as he pulled out a few mugs and set them in front of her. “Here I am doing all this for you and you say ‘in his own way’.” “I only meant that no one else would be nice like you are.” “Oh, I thought you were being sarcastic or something. Well?” he looked at the collection of about five mugs he had set before her. “Which one do you want for your very own?”

She shrugged, “I don’t know. I guess I have to try them. I believe you told me that they have to be just the right feel and all.” “Ma, can you handle this? I’m plum tuckered out already.” “Nope. This is all your little project, so you best be finishing it. Then put away the other mugs for me. I don’t want to have to get the step stool.” “Can’t Leaf Pile do it?” “She is no taller than me.” Joey pursed his lips and snarled at Autumn, “So, get with it.” “I can’t,” she sat looking at the mugs. “Why not?” “There isn’t any coffee in them. How will I know?” “Man, if I put coffee in all of them before you decide, then I’m going to have to wash them before I put them away,” he whined. “It was so sweet of you to offer,” Autumn smirked. “Ma, can I take her back to the airport?” “The plane doesn’t leave until February, ?” Autumn reminded him. The older lady chuckled, “I think you better quit while you’re ahead.” “I guess,” he said as he picked up her pills and dropped them in her purse. “Put your stuff in your room and I’ll pour your coffee. And mind you, you better drink it all.” “What if I was going back to bed?” “You won’t. You’ll be so wired that you’ll be awake a month after you drink all that coffee.” Alma turned to her son, “Just put a little in each cup for her, you bonehead.”

“I will put my things in my room. I just realized I don’t even have a robe on,” Autumn grimaced. “It wasn’t in my suitcase, because it took up so much room.” “Yah, you look like a sleepwalker,” Joey said, as she was leaving the room. Autumn stopped and pounced, “Did you say I looked like a street walker?” “Yea gads, no! They’re more dressed up than you! More like a frazzled housewife with that hairdo.” Auntie Alma said, “Please! Both of you, just be quiet. I need to adjust to being awake and you aren’t helping.”

Minutes later, Autumn came back up the stairs in her jeans and tee shirt on from the evening before. Her hair was pulled back in a quick ponytail. Her cousin looked at her and laughed. Autumn pouted, “Auntie Alma! He is being mean.” “I know,” the lady answered mechanically, “He can’t help it, so you might as well accept it.” He smirked at the girl and chuckled, “Neener, neener.” “Kept it up Hotshot, and you’ll both be helping me make dough!” his Mom pushed him out of the way as she reached down her dough pan. “Okay, Lady Leaves, here are your cups. Now, test them.” She took a long drink from each one in deep silence and obviously giving each experience critical judgment much to the annoyance of her cousin. Secretly, she had to it that the mug did make a difference. She discovered that she didn’t like very thick mugs, or heavy ones, while she wanted one that was heavy enough to keep the coffee warm. She did like putting the palm of her hand through the handle, like Joey, so needed a good-sized handle. One was very pretty, but top heavy and she worried it would spill easily. After a great consideration, she decided. “I have made my choice. I want the one with the ladybugs on it.” Joey crossed his eyes, “You could have just taken my word for it.”

“I know, but I had more fun this way!” She teased, “And now I get to watch you wash them all up.” “Only if you help me make breakfast,” Joey said. “Dad will be getting up soon. Since you didn’t let me rest all night, the least you can do is make me some breakfast.” “Oh, all right. I can’t believe someone is actually going to marry you. Beth must not know what she’s getting into.” “Don’t you tell her!” Uncle George stated emphatically as he entered the room. “We want him out of here so Ma and I can enjoy our old age.” “You won’t,” Joey stated as he put the mugs away, “Not with Leafy Spurge here.” “What is a leafy spurge?” Autumn asked. “It is a noxious weed that overgrows the prairies if given the chance.” George explained, “I’m sure my precious little niece will bring us nothing but joy.” Now Autumn turn made a face to Joey and said, “Neener, neener.” Alma had the dough kneaded together and placed in the dough pan to rise. She looked at her husband, “I think we should both pack our bags and run. We will leave this to them!” “Fine by me,” Joey grinned. “Just leave Gladys.” George kissed his niece’s cheek and then his wife’s. He looked at his son and asked, “Where’s my coffee?” “Here,” the young man handed the mug to his Dad. “That’s how this all started, you know.” “I honestly do not want to hear about it, do I Alma?” “I know I sure didn’t.”

Over breakfast, the four discussed the plans for the day. “Matt and Darrell said they’d be here about seven-thirty, but I suppose you know already,” George told his son. “I knew they’d be here, but not when. I talked to them before I came into town. They said they’d stop by last night.” “Figured,” George went on. “You work tonight?” “Nope. I’m off until Friday. I’ll sleep until noon and then go help.” “Oh, I’m sorry,” Autumn said, “I shouldn’t have kept you up talking. You needed your rest.” “That’s okay. If I was really tired, I would have just gone to bed.” Joey said seriously, “Anyway, I can go to sleep on a full stomach and sleep better.” “I thought it was harder to sleep on a full stomach.” “Just watch me!” “I’d rather skip that pleasure, if you don’t mind.” Autumn answered, “Besides, I need to straighten up my room and stuff.” “Suit yourself. Oh, when you clean your room, please keep the noise down.” “Uncle George, you have my solemn word I will not tell Beth what he is really like until it is way too late for her to give him back.” George grinned, “That’s my girl!”

After breakfast, Joey said goodnight to everyone. George put on his straw hat and went outside. The ladies cleared the table and Autumn asked, “Does Uncle George have chores to do?” “Not any more. The boys moved the milk cows all over to Darrell’s place and the hogs over to Dan and Jen’s place. We still have some chickens, which he cares for. George checks the horses, but the boys feed them the bales. He feeds

the cats, Gladys, and checks out the garden. You know, he went out first thing every morning for over fifty years. He can hardly stand it if he doesn’t.” “I imagine so. How has he been handling his chemo?” “This last go round has been pretty good. The first one was awful, but then he was feeling tough from the surgery and all. He seems to be doing well this time. The docs said they are pleased. He hasn’t licked it by a long shot yet, but he is improving. And God bless him, his spirits are much better.” Then she took her niece’s hand, “It’ll be good for him to have you here. He was so proud when you got your RN. I’m glad you decided to come up for us.” “Auntie, you and I both know you did it for me, not me for you! I appreciate it very much.” “It is a lot, losing your fiancé only two days before your wedding. I can’t imagine that.” “I’ll never forget the sheriff coming up the walk to Bronston’s front door that evening. The minute I saw him, I knew it was bad news.” Joey had come back into the room and stopped cold, “I thought you found out in the emergency room.” “No,” her eyes shot toward him in alarm, “No. I was at Bronston’s place.” “Oh, I guess I misunderstood,” he said, even though he knew he had heard her say she ran out of the hospital that day. He waited for her to say more but when she didn’t, he said, “I brought you this sweater to wear for our midnight talks. Don’t get it unraveled or anything, because I’m just lending it to you. So, don’t wreck it. Thought I might as well lend it to you or you would just pilfer it when you saw it.” Autumn looked at the beautiful, navy blue cowl neck, long sweater with a tie belt. It was soft and comfy. It would be especially nice for a robe. “Thanks, Joey,” she said, looking him square in the eye. She knew that he knew. He had caught her misdirected comment and was kind enough to not mention it. He gave her a slight hug, “Enjoy it. You can wear it when we go for our walk tonight.”

She nodded, knowing full well he was not going to let it go. She would have to explain it to him. She could. She knew she could. Maybe she wouldn’t have to tell the whole truth, but she had managed to get by with those half-truths this long. “Tonight?” “Tonight,” he nodded and went back down the stairs.

She helped her aunt clean up the dishes and they talked about the day. Autumn went down to straighten up her room. She fixed her hair to look halfway decent before she went back up to help Auntie Alma. She watched from the house, when a variety of men came into the yard, with their equipment. They headed out to the fields. George was riding with his youngest son, Darrell, to supervise. It was still just a little before eight in the morning. On the porch as they watched the men leave for the fields, Auntie Alma took her elbow. “What do you say, you and I put our feet up on the back patio before we have to make out the buns?” They did and Autumn used her ladybug cup again. They sat on the rattan chairs and looked out over the lawn, “Those flowers by my bedroom window are beautiful, Auntie Alma. Do you tend them?” “No, George does that now. He has a yearning to help things grow, you know. That’s the farmer in him. Sam and Joey do the mowing, but they let him weed and prune. They know it is important to him.” “They seem like fine men.” “Thank you. I’m proud of them from time to time. Then sometimes, I pull my Farrah Fawcett mask over my face and pretend like I’ve never met either of them!” “Oh, I don’t imagine that happens too often.” “I’m so glad they are finally settling down. You know, Sammy was hurt badly by a girl in his senior year in high school. He was head over heels in love. The girl took off without a word to elope with another guy. First, he swore off women altogether, but of course, that didn’t last. Although, it did last for about a year,

before he decided to become the neighborhood Don Juan. Love ‘em and leave ‘em. No matter what anyone said to him, he was not ever going to let anyone steal his heart again.” “I imagine he turned a lot of heads. He is a good-looking guy.” “Yes, but his father never cottoned to that type of behavior. Sammy did temper it, but he still had no intention of settling down. Then last year, he met up with Father Bart’s sister, Bonnie. Of all the girls in their family, she was the heartbreaker. She was the female version of him. For some reason, those two zeroed in on the other. I think it was because they both thought they had encountered a real challenge in the other. While they were trying to gain advantage in their conquest, they accidentally fell in love. Once they realized that, they both gave up their wandering and have been totally devoted to each other. I wouldn’t have believed it, had I not seen it with my own eyes!” “I didn’t know that could happen. It’s great that it did, though.” Autumn nodded, “So Joey just followed in his brother’s footsteps?” “No. He has always had a mind of his own, though most folks lump them together as the Jessup Boys. He’s never had trouble getting a girl, but was never into the conquest game. He just likes their company and has always had many girls who are friends. I think he only had a couple that he was ever even interested in, and then not much. But once he saw Beth, that was it. She was all he talked about after that. She is a real pixie of a person, bouncy and smart. She is a meteorologist. Can you imagine that? She smiles a lot and enjoys life. Both she and Joey are blatantly honest, almost to the point of being embarrassing sometimes. She and her two sisters were out here to visit their brother, and after she went home, she and Joey were on the phone nearly every waking minute. You know, once she moves out here, Bell Telephone will likely have to lay off hundreds of workers!” “Have they set a wedding date?” “Yes, sort of. Sometime in October, but not Halloween. They are having a double wedding and Father Bart is going to marry them, and of course, Byron will officiate also. My, my. We have so much clergy in our family, it’s crazy, huh? I may have to start minding my P’s and Q’s.” “Oh, Auntie, you have always been a nice person. I know that.”

“Honey child, it’s kind of you to say that, but we both know everyone has some pits in their veneer.” “Yes, I do know that, but I’m sure your pits are tiny.” “If that were true,” the lady smiled. “A few may be considered crevices!”

Before ten, they had the house cleaned up except the rooms the boys were sleeping in and they had set in the large table. The phone rang and it was Jeannie calling to say that she and Diane were on their way to the fields to take a little lunch to the men. Then they would be over. Autumn asked, “I thought they were having lunch here.” “Oh, that is dinner. They are just taking them a little lunch to tide them over until dinner. You know; coffee, lemonade, and a sweet treat. Then in the afternoon, they have another lunch. In the evening have a supper, and treat before bed.” “They have another lunch?” Autumn giggled. “You got it! I guess you could call it really a break.” Auntie Alma laughed, “However, they do a lot of physical work so they need to take a break for a bit.”

7-

A car pulled into the yard by the house and two women got out and opened their trunk. Alma was out the door in a flash to help them. Autumn hesitated but reluctantly followed. These people had no idea how much she hated meeting new folks. They always asked the ‘polite’ questions that required answers she didn’t want to give. It reminded her of dogs smelling each other’s rears. If your smell was acceptable, fine. If not, then what? If only her answers could be: My husband and I are here on vacation— Yes, I’m married, no children yet— I have a wonderful job I’ll be going back to next week… Blah, blah. Instead with her answers, there was always that awkward silence and usually the other person ended up apologizing for something they had nothing to do with and had just that moment ever heard of. It was all very silly, to her mind. Alma was carrying a large box filled with Tupperware containers and the younger of the two women was carrying a roaster. The other woman had another box overloaded with bags and boxes. Alma asked Autumn to hold the door open for them, which she did. She felt a bit ridiculous, since they were all loaded down. The women set their loads on the counter and then Alma said, “Girls, I’d like you meet my niece from down south. She was a dear and came up to help her Uncle George out with his chemo and such. We’re delighted to have our Autumn here.” Both women smiled warmly, and the younger brunette came over to her and gave her a bit of hug. “I’m Jeannie. My Darrell has been so excited to see his cousin. I think he called you Leaves, though.” “Yes, I think Sammy started that. Or Joey.” She smiled, “I was hoping they’d have forgotten it by now.” “Not likely with those guys.” Jeannie giggled, “This is my yard mate, Diane Harrington. Darrell calls her Tink. I think you met Matt, her husband.” “What is a yard mate?”

“We live in the same yard and are best friends.” “Tink?” Autumn smiled, “Short of Tinkerbell, I hope.” “My goodness, I can tell you’re related to those guys. I didn’t know it was hereditary! Yes, but I don’t think Darrell has called me Tinkerbell for a long time now. It’s usually just Tink. My nickname has a nickname!” The slender brunette who was about thirty, held out her hand to Autumn, “I assume you would prefer to be called Autumn.” She shrugged, “Oh, I guess I don’t care. Whichever comes to your mind.” “Okay,” Diane nodded, “Alma, I have to get some of this in the oven.” “Here, let me help you. What temperature do you want the oven on?” “Oh, 300° will be good.” The other ladies were getting the roaster plugged in on the counter while she and Diane put the various covered baking dishes in the oven. Then they worked on finding room in the fridge for the salad and pies. “My goodness,” Alma put her hands on her hips, “You brought enough food for the Pacific Fleet. We could’ve put more of the menu, besides the fresh rolls.” “I thought I smelled them!” Jeannie grinned, “Now I need to find the butter and have myself a bun.” “We just took them out before you drove in,” Alma laughed as she handed her the butter and a knife. “Let’s take a break and you can tell me what all you brought!” The women sat at around the counter and each had a hot bun with butter and a cup of coffee. “I hope you don’t have a specific mug. Joey really gave me a bad time ing his cup by mistake.” “You didn’t! Oh, what a dastardly thing to happen!” Jeannie gasped, “Did he have to be resuscitated? He really has a thing about his pink mug!” Diane winced, “Joey has a pink mug? Why?”

“Oh, Tink,” Jeannie explained, “Don’t ever ask him. He will give you ten minute seminar on the importance of proper coffee mugging.” Autumn was nodding in agreement, “That’s no exaggeration. I even had to go through the process of making a choice of one for me! It was rather an ordeal.” “Well?” Jeannie asked. “Well, what?” “Did you find the right one?” Autumn had to chuckle, “You know, I did. Please don’t tell him, but there is really a difference in mugs. As much as I hate to say it, he is right about that.” “Oh Lordie,” Auntie Alma squawked, “Don’t ever let him hear that! He is bad enough without encouragement.” The women chatted and then got busy putting the final touches on a fine meal of hamburger hot dish and a chicken goulash, with various side dishes and salads. In the fridge was a variety of cream pies. Alma shook her head, “I could’ve made them. You didn’t have to do it all.” “Oh Mom,” Jeannie frowned, “You have been doing for us forever. Now let us do for you for a change. Besides, we wanted to make a good impression on our new neighbor. We don’t want Autumn to think we are sloughing off.” “You don’t need to impress me,” Autumn couldn’t conceal her surprise that someone would even think of impressing her. “I’m certainly nothing to impress.” “Oh, don’t be modest,” Diane responded, “The guys came home last night raving about you!” “Me?” “Unless there’s someone else named Old Leaves!” They chattered while they worked. It was fun banter and nothing that put her on the spot. Autumn was feeling comfortable with these gals, and had not been put

through the usual interrogation. Maybe, it was because they knew her background through Darrell. She wasn’t certain why, but was a pleasant feeling. Then they heard Sammy and Joey come up the stairs. Of course, those two were already carrying on about something. “I think we should use real strong coffee, not instant,” Sammy was saying. “I hate instant coffee.” “We aren’t drinking it. It is just for our marinade. We can get it stronger with instant,” Joey was explaining. “What are you two marinating?” Jeannie asked. “Don’t tell her,” Sammy cautioned his brother, “She will rat us out to Darrell and next thing, he will cop our recipe.” “I know what he is making and it doesn’t use coffee marinade.” Jeannie kissed the cheeks of her two brothers-in-law. “I take it that it is the marinade for your Cowboy Brisket.” “Now,” Sam frowned, “How did you figure that out?” “Because Doorbell, that is what you and Joey signed up for the cookout.” She shook her head, “What else would it be?” “Sometimes I don’t like you,” he grinned and then gave Diane a peck on the cheek, “How’s little Tink?” “Good. I am enjoying visiting with your cousin, Autumn.” “You mean Old Leaves, don’t you?” Sammy smirked. “Did she happen to tell you about my coffee mug?” Joey ratted, “She put her gloms on it right off! Why she got up in the dead of night to swipe it! I’m warning you, lock up any of your good utensils, or she’ll have them before daybreak.” “I don’t steal utensils,” Autumn retorted and then stopped dead in her tracks. Sammy burst out laughing, “That is like saying I don’t still beat my wife!”

“I can’t stand it, Auntie Alma,” Autumn whimpered to her aunt. “When they get too bad, just give one of us a call and we’ll offer you refuge,” Jeannie giggled. “Do you boys ever get tired?” “No,” Joey blathered on, “I had enough sleep. I don’t need a lot of rest.” Jeannie rolled her eyes, “When you call, Autumn, I think we’ll just keep on driving until we are far away.” “I’m coming, too!” Diane jumped in. “Don’t forget me,” Alma said. “I’ve been waiting for years to run away!” While Joey was filling a large water jug with ice and cold water, he curled his finger to Autumn to come over where he was. There he said quietly, “I called and got an appointment for you with Dr. Samuels on Thursday. I hope that will fit your schedule.” “Joey…” she started to object. “I can cancel if you want, but you won’t get your prescription refilled.” She thought a minute and nodded, “Okay. Thanks, I guess. What time?” “Ten. Is that okay?” “Sure, my schedule seems to be open.” He winked at her, “At least for now. Once the neighborhood fellas meet you, you’ll need a social secretary.” She frowned, “No. I told you, I will not.” “I know what you said.” Joey tightened the lid on the water jug and said in a more conversation tone, “Want to come to the field with us?” “I think not. I can’t really see me doing that.” “Never know unless you try.”

“There are some things I’m rather certain about.” “Suit yourself. Oh, Sammy and I are going to find you a steed.” “A steed? What on earth is a steed?” the young woman asked. “A riding horse,” Sammy scrunched up his face, “Don’t you learn nothing down in Georgia? Everybody knows that.” “Well,” she bantered back, “Do you know what a cottonmouth looks like?” He laughed, “As a matter of fact, I do. If I right, you and I learned at Gibson’s creek on the same day!” “Oh, I forgot.” She stood tall, “Well, I’ll have you know that us Southerners do know how to ride horses. We have a statue of General Robert E Lee on his horse, Traveller, with two ‘l’s like the British spelling!” Sammy put both hands on his head, “Yea gads, Leaves! You don’t bring that up in Yankee territory! Not Red Coats or Confederates!” “Maybe some of these people are from down south. Right?” Diane mumbled, “Sorry. I’m from Maine.” “I’m from North Dakota, but I do have southern ties,” Jeannie offered. “I married one.” “That doesn’t count.” Sammy dismissed her. Auntie Alma reached over and playfully took Sam by the ear, “I’m from the South and I am the one you need to watch out for in this house!” “Yes, Ma’am. I love you, too.” Sammy shuddered. “Okay, Leaves, Joe and I will look for a horse like Traveller for you.” “I don’t want a horse.” “Yes, you do. We do a lot of riding up here and you don’t want to be left out.” Her eyes moved toward Joey, who nodded. She sighed, “Okay. But it better not

be a bucking bronco.” Sam chuckled, “One bronco, coming up! You can trust us!” About then, the men started arriving from the fields. There of course, was Uncle George and Darrell. She recognized Matt and Brett, but no one else. When she saw a little boy who looked like that kid CJ, she had to ask, “Did I meet you at Ellison’s yesterday?” “No, Miss Autumn. That was my brother, CJ. I’m Clarence Grey Hawk. I work for Mr. Darrell. CJ told me all about you. He said you were cool and were going to look at his rabbits and then go exploring with him and Little Charlie.” “We did talk about that.” “He and Charlie have been making plans since then. If I was you, I’d tell them I couldn’t walk very far. They were thinking on ten miles.” Clarence explained, “Those two make me dizzy, but they can be fun for a while.” “Good advice,” Andy Schroeder nodded and held out his hand to shake hers. “I’m Andy Schroeder, Clarence and CJ’s brother. Welcome to the neighborhood. We’ll be looking forward to getting to know you.” “Thank you.” “My wife Annie and I live with my folks, so you will get to meet her soon.” “And you will meet me for sure,” Danny Schroeder came forward. “I’m married to your cousin, Jen. Brett lives at our place.” “Your yard mate?” Danny grinned, “Been talking to Jeannie, I see. She’s the only one who says that!” “That’s not true,” Diane interrupted, “I do.” “Well, that’s because of Jeannie.” Diane was insistent, “It is a fine word, and I should know. I teach English.”

“Here we go,” Danny laughed, “Pulling rank.” Before the men had all sat at the table, she had been introduced to them all. There was Josh Perkins, who was getting married to Jeannie’s sister, and Eddie Frandsen, who was Jeannie’s brother. Then there was Marty Schroeder, who was Danny’s brother and they were both cousins of Andy Schroeder. Also, she met Gary Larson and Kid Effan who lived with Schroeders. There was also a young Indian fellow, Jackson Fielding, who was living at Schroeder’s house and he was CJ and Clarence’s stepbrother. Then was also a man introduced as Father Landers. She didn’t know that Catholic priests ever helped do fieldwork and he didn’t wear a clerical collar, so she thought Father Landers might have been another Darrell nickname. She was wrong. When they all said grace before they ate, Uncle George asked Father Landers to lead the prayer. She was totally confused and was very glad to sit quietly without having to talk. However, she listened with great interest to the conversation. Sammy announced that he and Joey were buying Old Leaves a horse. He would be calling Jerald Oxenfelter right after lunch with their order. All the men nodded it was a good idea. “Best she be learning on a gentle pony first.” Kid suggested, “I can give you your first lesson on Millie.” “That old thing can barely move!” Sammy howled with laughter. “It is a good way to start,” Kid explained. Brett acknowledged, “I wish I had started out on Millie. It would have been a lot better than having Cocoa dump me! That was painful, not only to my pride but my hinder.” As she listened to them talk, she was amazed how well they all got along. There must have been twenty folks at the table and no one was trying to blow their own horn or boast. They really seemed to enjoy each other. She had to it, she had never noticed that folks weren’t enjoying each other before, but with this group it was obvious that they did. She was just thinking how nice it was not to be put on the spot, when the ladies served the pies. As she was gathering the dirty plates, while the other ladies poured more coffee or dished out the pie, Darrell changed that, “Guys, we have a new entrant in the

pie contest for the cookout. Old Leaves will be serving her mud pies.” Autumn frowned, “I will do no such thing.” “Yes,” he nodded without expression, “You will. I already paid Jeannie your entry fee. Now, Autumn Leaves, it is up to you to do your wizardry to win the entire crowd over!” “I will not.” “Oh, yes,” Sammy bulldozed in, “You will. I will see to it that she does, little brother. Your entry fee won’t be in vain.” “Auntie Alma?” Autumn whimpered, “What is happening?” Nine-year old Clarence reached over and took her hand, “It is okay, Miss Autumn. I’ll be your partner if you want. These guys are just giving you the business. I don’t know how to make them, but if you tell me, I promise to help.” Autumn was deeply touched by the sincerity of this young boy. She smiled at him, “Well, thank you so much, Clarence. That is very kind of you. I’ll talk to you later about it. Okay?” “Okay, Miss Autumn. I am either at my house or Darrell’s. I think your Auntie has my phone number.” “I will call you,” she answered all the while trying to think of what the heck she could make for the mud pie.

When the men went back out to the field, Joey went with them. Sammy went out to see to the horses and then get ready for work. While the ladies did up the dishes, Alma said, “I’m sorry the boys did that to you. You can tell them to take a hike if you want.” “I would, Auntie Alma, except that Clarence was so sweet about it. I think I will enter and have Clarence for my partner.” “Are you really going to make mud pies?” Diane asked.

“I ed our cook having a recipe for Louisiana Mud Pies at home. It was a chocolate cream type pie with pecans and caramel, too. I’ll call her and get the recipe. I will teach those twerps.” Autumn smirked, “That will fix their wagon.” “Good for you, girl. I’m glad you don’t let those lugs intimidate you,” Jeannie grinned. “You stand right up to them!” “That’s because I’ve known them since I was knee-high. There are a lot of folks who intimidate me, but Sammy, Joey, and Darrell are not among them.” Diane beamed, “Welcome to our ranks. You’re just what we needed!”

8-

Diane and Jeannie left that afternoon about three. The ladies looked over the leftovers from the noon meal and decided to put them in the oven on low for their dinner. They got everything set for supper and Alma said, “Now, when the men get home, we can eat.” “What time will that be?” “About five. The other guys have to go do chores and stuff.” Auntie Alma and Autumn sat down with a glass of iced lemonade on the back patio. “I guess I need to find out just exactly what this cookout thing is. Is it like a county fair?” Autumn asked. “Similar, but not.” Alma began to explain, “See, there’s this bunch of folks known as the Engelmann Clan. They are like a big family and hang out together all they time. Well, a couple of the older fellows got to bragging last spring. They challenged each other to a cookout to see who was the best with a barbeque grill. Before you know it, they had the whole clan roped into their escapade. Of course, that didn’t settle anything, so this year they are having an even bigger one.” “But pies aren’t grilled.” “No, but last year they ended up with potatoes, side dishes, breads, desserts, -you name it. Those guys are crazy.” “Are you and Uncle George part of this clan?” “Yes and no. We’re in the outer circle. The real clanners get together every Sunday like clockwork after church at the Schroeder place for dinner. There are about sixty of them.” “Wow. I noticed that you say Schray-der. I always thought that name was pronounced Schroh-der.”

“I know some branches say it that way. These guys say Schray-der. It’s their name, so I take their word for it.” “Then some of those guys that were here for lunch are in this clan?” “Yes. All are, at least to some extent. Eddie Frandsen, Sammy, and Joey are in the outer circle. I mean they are always welcome, but don’t spend as much time with them as the true clanners.” “You mean, except that priest. Is he really a priest?” “Yes, Father Landers is at St. Johns. All three priests and Sister Abigail are clanners.” “I didn’t know they could do that…I mean belong to a secret organization.” “Oh Autumn, there is nothing secretive or sinister about the clan. The clan started when Byron and Elton Schroeder became friends with Lloyd and Katherine Engelmann. Katherine was the church secretary and of course, Elton is Byron’s best friend. They were like family. Before long, Engelmann’s, who had no children, took them under their wing. Soon it included their families, friends, and such. It is just a huge extended family, but there is nothing secret. The only initiation is that they think you are part of the tribe. They call it clan.” “Sounds odd.” Alma laughed, “It really isn’t. Darrell and Marly have been clanners since the beginning.” “Why don’t you and Uncle George spend more time with them?” “Oh, we’re with them a lot, but you know, we had a pile of our own kids. We just didn’t have the time.” “So, that little boy, Clarence, is Andy’s brother and Jackson’s stepbrother? I don’t understand.” “Clarence is the oldest of five children, the Grey Hawks. They were the children of Jackson’s stepfather. When Jackson’s mom and stepdad died in a car accident, the kids were orphaned. Jackson was recuperating from his war injuries and

couldn’t take care of them. He and Andy were best friends in Vietnam and he was recuperating at Schroeder’s place. When Elton and Nora, his wife, heard of the dilemma, they took all five kids in as foster children. That way they could be with their stepbrother and wouldn’t have to be split up. Their adoption papers were just signed last month. The kids chose to keep their last name, Grey Hawk, instead of becoming Schroeder, out of respect for their father. Nora confided in me that was mostly Clarence’s idea. The other kids just didn’t want to learn how to spell Schroeder.” Autumn giggled, “Clarence seems young to be working for Darrell.” “Oh, he is nine. Nine-year olds can do a lot and Darrell watches out for him. At first, Jeannie tutored him, because he was behind in school. He started helping milk the goats because he wanted to buy a couple of his own. Darrell said if he worked so many hours, he could earn them. He has worked there ever since. Jeannie says he is a great joy to them both. They love him and he enjoys it at their place. Since he was the oldest of the five, he was always responsible for the other kids and never had time for himself. You know Darrell. He loves having his own little prodigy!” “I think I just get more confused,” Autumn shook her head, “I thought there wouldn’t be many people up here. Just the family out in the prairies.” “I guess that’s true, until you make everyone on the prairies your family! Anyway, last year, Sam and Joey took a ribbon in the cookout and this year they have entered their Cowboy Brisket. Darrell and his partner Kevin Schroeder, your cousin Carrie’s husband, won the ribbon for their grilled buttermilk game hens. They were very good.” “Now, have I met Kevin? Is he Danny’s brother?” “I don’t think you’ve met him yet. He is Andy’s brother.” “Auntie Alma, I will never get this straight.” Alma laughed, “Oh don’t be perplexed, honey child. None of us have it straight! It is not necessary. Just enjoy it.” “That’s a relief.” Autumn took a sip of lemonade, “So, then Diane isn’t a clanner.”

“Oh yes, she and Matt are very much so. And so is her brother, Randy who is marrying the other Fedder girl, Bea.” “Stop! I can’t absorb anymore! Are there only four families in this country that just keep marrying each other?” Alma thought and smiled, “Might just be at that.” “Now, what do I have to do for this contest?” “I guess Darrell signed you up, so all you have to do is get together with Clarence and practice making your pies. It’ll be at the Petunia Patch this year on July 23.” “Wow! That is only a week away! Now is that the Petunia place that is the babysitters?” “Yes, Carl and Maureen Kincaid, or Mo. She is Matt’s mom. It was Carl and Elton who started the cookout. This year it will be at Carl’s. Quonset.” “Oh, that’s what Uncle George called his garage!” “Yes, that it is. Quonset is the brand name of these steel buildings you see all over. They are used for all sorts of things from barns to garages. In fact, that Brett lives in one at Dan and Jen’s place. It is part machine shed and part karate gym.” “I feel like I landed in Oz.” Alma patted her hand, “I believe that you might have at that! Were you going to call your Mother to get the recipe for that pie?” “Oh yes, I should do that.” The gals went inside and Autumn called home. She told her Mother about the cookout and asked for the pie recipe. Her Mother read it to her while she copied it down. Then she said, “Autumn, Robert Vander Vorst dropped off a box of things for you from Brad’s old apartment. He and his wife thought you might want them. Vander Vorsts didn’t know what they were, but since they were like mementos, they thought they’d have meaning for you. Dad and I mailed it off to

you. Robert said Brad’s roommate, Jake, moved and left that stuff. He is moving back to Tennessee to be with his family, who were very devastated by that death in their family. You know, the one that Jake called about that day.” Her mother hesitated. “Yes, Mother. I know.” Autumn said quietly, “I thought Brad had moved all of his stuff out of the apartment on Lucille Drive. Anyway, I really don’t want to talk about this right now. Okay?” “I understand. I just wanted you to expect the box next week, in case there is something valuable in it. Your other boxes should be there tomorrow or the next day.” “I really appreciate you and Dad sending all that for me.” She was afraid she was going to burst into tears, “Mother? Do you want to talk to Auntie Alma?” “That’d be nice. I hope you have good luck with your recipe.” While her aunt was talking, Autumn took off outside. She tried to walk casually from the house, but once she was out of sight of it, she broke into a full-fledged run. Where she was running to, she didn’t know— or why, for that matter. She just ran as fast as she could. She didn’t notice the pickup turn up their road. Both Uncle George and Joey saw her running like a deranged antelope across the pasture. When they got to the house, they asked Alma about it. She had hung up and shrugged, “Sis explained that she had likely upset her because Brad’s father had dropped off some things from his old apartment for her. I could see by the look on her face that she was upset when she handed me the phone. She was running?” Alma got a worried expression, “Joey, could I ask…..” “I’m on it.” The young man went out the door in a flash to the well where the horses were congregated. His horse, Cheetah, came to his whistle and he jumped on him bareback and headed off in the direction they had seen Autumn. She was out of sight, but it didn’t take to them too long to come up behind her. She had slowed down considerably, not only from being tired, but also from crying. Joey jumped off his horse beside the astonished girl and grabbed her arm,

“Where you off to?” She stepped back from him, “Just for a walk.” “Yah, that’s what I do. I walk like I’m in the Indy 500, bawling all the way!” Joey said as he gripped her arm. “Just go away! Can’t a person be alone?” “Of course, but not when they are as upset as you are,” Joey wasn’t about to budge, “Besides you don’t know where you are going?” “Is it dangerous where I’m going?” “The way you are going about it, it might be. Have a sit with me and we can hash it over. Then if you still want to walk, you can.” “I don’t want to and besides, what’s it to you?” “Girl, you’re as stubborn as a four dollar mule!” he frowned and pointed to the ground, “Sit.” She squinted, “You really don’t back off, do you?” “Not so much.” He sat down and she reluctantly sat about four feet away from him. He had to stifle a grin at her, but didn’t say any more about her being so obstinate. “Ma was worried when Pa asked her why you were running like the devil.” “I suppose you couldn’t wait to spill the beans that I’m a psycho.” “No, I didn’t. But I’m warning you, I may have to drag you to see Samuels before Thursday if you think you are going to make this a habit.” She frowned at him in anger and then her resolve weakened. The tears renewed their overflow and she said, “Sometimes I can hardly keep it all in.” “Maybe you shouldn’t.” “Yes. I really have to. I should’ve taken my tranquilizer this afternoon. I thought

maybe I could get by, but just look.” “I heard that you were upset when you talked to your mother.” “I love my mother.” “I do, too, but it was something about a box.” “Good night! People just blab everything they know! When did I become the topic of interest for everyone?” Joey looked off toward the horizon, “Maybe when you started taking off like quicksilver across the pasture. Why did you do that? And don’t tell me you were picking wildflowers.” She dropped her head, “No. I just felt like I had to break out! I have kept a lid on everything so long and I’m about to boil over. You know, people don’t want you to cry but if you are too happy, they think you’re weird. They want you to get on with a new life, but then keep dragging the old one back into it. Just what the hell is a person supposed to do?” Joey moved over beside her and put his arm over her shoulder, “Whatever feels right to you. Except maybe not running across a pasture in a frenzy. That’s a bit abnormal, although I should’ve clocked you. You’re one fast girl!” She swatted him and then cried into his shoulder. After a couple minutes, she said, “You are a pretty good friend, you know.” “Yah, I try.” “Oh, and did I say modest?” “No. I don’t think you mentioned that.” He patted her back as she pulled herself together. “Look Leaves, I’m sure stuff will hit you like this once in a while. No worries. I have felt like running myself once in a while, but I’m too darned lazy. That’s the nice thing about having a horse. A lot of people go riding to blow off their bottled energy.” “Doesn’t that just blow off the horses’ energy?”

He thought and grinned, “You might be right about that.” “Joey, I called Mother to get a recipe. I’m going to put something in that contest and have Clarence be my partner. He seems like a great kid.” “He is. I hope someday I have a kid as good as him.” “I think you will.” “A compliment?” Joey smiled, “Are you sure you want to let that stand?” “Ah, as long as I can’t be held to it.” He laughed, “Do you want to talk, walk, or come back with me?” “How?” He rolled his eyes, “I thought you could walk behind Cheetah and me. What do you think? You can ride with me.” “How?” “On the horse’s back.” Joey scrunched up his face, “Man are you dense!” “But the horse doesn’t have a saddle on it or anything.” He looked at his horse, “You’re quite right. Had you given us a bit more time, we might have put one on it. Since you didn’t, we’ll have go bareback.” “She doesn’t even have those strings on her head.” “God, help me!” He looked at the sky, “Leaves, they are called reins and they are not ever called strings! Come on, before I leave you out here.” “That’s not very nice.” He stood and offered a hand up. She got up and he moved beside Cheetah and put his hands together next to the animal. “What are you doing?” she asked innocently.

“Giving you a boost up. Now, put your foot into my hands and then throw your other leg over Cheetah’s back.” “What if she runs off with me?” “First, Cheetah is a he and second, he won’t take off. He is a good horse.” He chuckled, “Besides, you wouldn’t get very far before you fell off” “That’s just great! I hope you know what you’re doing.” “So do I.” She gave him a dirty look, but put her foot into his hands. She couldn’t boost herself up, until he told her to put her hands on his shoulder. She put them on his head instead and nearly collapsed his spinal cord before she got on the horse. Then he swung himself up behind her and reached around to Cheetah’s mane. They began moving forward in a walk. After Joey felt her begin to relax a bit, he said, “By the way, shoulders are what a person’s arms are attached to. You grabbed my head! Now I’m about three inches shorter.” “Oh, sorry.” “No you’re not.” “No, likely not much.”

They rode back in silence most of the way to the barn. As they approached the farmyard, she said, “Joey, I think I won’t go for a walk tonight, if you don’t mind.” “That’s okay. I imagine your legs are beginning to cramp up from the sprinting. You just eat dinner and then get some rest. We can talk tomorrow.” “I’ll run right to my room and get my tranquilizers before dinner.” “Why don’t you hold off until you go to bed? Think you will be okay>”

“I guess.” Then she asked, barely above a whisper, “Joey, do you think secrets can make a person go crazy?” “I don’t know, Autumn. Maybe you would want to ask Samuels about that.” “Good idea.”

9-

The rest of the evening, Autumn barely said more than a couple words to anyone. She ate very little and helped with dishes. Then she told everyone goodnight and went to her room. She couldn’t wait to take her sleeping pills. In her haste, she took the tranquilizers instead. She took a quick shower and put on her pajamas. She used no lotion of any sort and especially nothing with plumeria. She closed the shades, went to bed, and wound up in her nest of blankets. There she cried. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep without her sleeping pills, so she crawled out of her shroud and took them. She normally took two, but since she had been so upset, she thought she’d better take three. Only for tonight. Because she was so upset.

It was about three when Sammy came home. He slipped on the bottom step and crashed to the floor. Joey ran out to see if he was okay. He was jarred, but had nothing major sprained or broken. Sammy groaned, rubbing his foot, “I probably woke the whole house.” Joey looked at Autumn’s door and at first thought she must just be sound asleep. Then he ed who he was dealing with. “Old Leaves should have been out here in a flash. You okay?” “Sure, bro. I guess I should just open my eyes when I walk.” Joey helped him up and walked his brother to his room. Joey hesitated and stared at Autumn’s door. He debated about what to do. Maybe he was overly concerned. She’d kill him if he woke her up to ask her if she was awake! But something nagged at him. He knocked. No answer. Then he said, “Autumn? You awake?” There was no sound. Then he got worried and tried the door. It wasn’t locked so he went in, calling in a loud whisper, “Leaves, you awake?”

The only sound was Sammy’s shower. He went toward her bed and noticed the blankets, no longer tucked in, but wrapped around her like a mummy. Her two prescription bottles on her bedside table. He was almost dizzy as he called her name a bit louder but there was still no answer. Overcome with a nauseating dread, he reached down and shook her shoulder. For a long few seconds there was no response and he was about to scream in panic. Finally, she groaned. He tried to rouse her anxiously, “Autumn, wake up. Dammit Leaves, answer me!” By now his mind was in a small terror deciding whether to call Zach and Samuels for help. He shook her again, “Autumn, please! I’ll take you to the hospital. How many pills did you take? Wake up.” She groaned again and then moaned, “Oh.” Joey was livid, “What the hell did you do? How many of those damned pills did you take? Wake up! I need to know. I’ll get your stomach pumped!” She tried to sit up in her shroud, but could hardly move. Joey unwrapped her blankets. “What the hell? Do you think you are a pig-in-the-blanket or what? Wake up!” “Huh?” she asked, barely able to mumble. “Joe?” “I’m going to get some coffee. You just stay put.” As he said that, he grumped to himself, “Hell, she couldn’t go anywhere if she wanted to.” He ran upstairs and grabbed her coffee mug, thankful that Sammy had made a full pot. He sprinted back down the stairs trying to if a person was supposed to feed an overdose coffee or raw eggs. He had read about eggs somewhere. It is supposed to make someone throw up, but he really didn’t want her to throw up in that mass of blankets. He had decided that once Sammy was finished with his shower, even though he had promised Autumn he would not tell anyone, he’d call him to help take her in. He couldn’t do this alone. If she didn’t like it, too damned bad. He wasn’t very happy himself. This time when he called her name, she responded right away. He set the mug on the bedside table and helped her sit up. “Autumn, you have to wake up for me. Okay?”

“Okay.” He almost cried with relief, “How many sleeping pills? ?” “Only three.” “It says on the label you are supposed to only take one. What time was that?” He pushed the coffee mug to her face, “Drink some of this, now.” She took a couple big swallows that he almost forced into her face, until she snapped, “Are you trying to drown me?” “I should, you know! Of all the stupid things to do,” he went on as he put the mug back up to her lips. “You are a nurse, for crying out loud! You know better than that! Is that all you took?” She shrugged but he glared at her, “No way. Tell me what you took last night and when.” “I don’t ,” she mumbled. “Have it your way. When Sam’s out of the shower, we’re taking you to the hospital. I’ll call Samuels and have him meet us there!” She shook her head no, “You promised.” “That was before I realized you were going to pull a stunt like this!” “I didn’t do anything.” “Committing suicide is something.” Anger began pumping her adrenaline and she answered with some strength, “I just wanted to get some sleep, not kill myself.” He rolled his eyes and shook his head, “And I have your word for that? You are incredible!” By now, she had guzzled nearly three quarters of the mug of coffee, “When I got to my room, I took two tranquilizers. I had planned on taking my sleeping pills instead. When I realized my mistake, I took three sleeping pills.”

“Holy God,” Joey gasped, “That is five pills! Have you lost your mind? Why didn’t you say you needed to talk? Never do that! You could’ve died. Then what?” “I guess then I would be done with it.” “Yah, that’s great… for you,” He snarled, “Then Ma and Pa could live with it the rest of their lives! And what about me? I was trying to be your friend? I should just deck you.” “What time is it?” “I don’t know, about three-thirty. Sam just got home. He fell down the last step and I woke up. What if he would have broken his leg or something? Our resident nurse would’ve been doped up to the gills. I’m calling Dr. Samuels and seeing if I need to bring you in.” He took the pill bottles and then instructed her to get out of bed. She started to object and he faced her, “You have no say in this matter.” He ran upstairs and called the psychiatrist. When he heard the names, amount, and time the pills were taken, Dr. Samuels figured that she’d be okay at this point, but directed Joey to keep the pills in his control. He wanted to see her in his office about nine in the morning. “Keep an eye on her. Any problems, bring her right in.” “You got it.” Joey ran back down the steps, into this room, and pulled his jeans on. He also put the pill bottles in his sock drawer. He dashed back to her room to find her sitting on the edge of the bed, still a bit dazed, but beginning to get madder and madder. She narrowed her eyes and hissed at him, “I hope your fit made you feel better. Damn you. I’ll never forget you did this.” Then they heard Sammy’s door open, “Is everything okay? What’s going on?” Joey made a quick appraisal of the situation and went out in that hall, “Yes, everything’s fine. Leaves and I are going for a walk. We were just trying to figure out how warm it was outside.”

“It’s nice out.” Sam shook his head, “Quiet down. I need some sleep.” “Sorry. We didn’t mean to disturb you.” “Yea gads, you could wake the dead.” Joey rolled his eyes, thinking to himself, ‘if you only knew.’ He went back into her room and told her, “Pull on your jeans and grab that sweater. You and I are going for a walk.” “Good grief,” she said, “I just want to sleep. Can’t you leave me alone?” “I will after we get some fresh air. I want to know you’re okay.” “You are a major pain.” “And you should be able to recognize that!” A few minutes later, she was standing in the hall in her slippers, jeans, pajama top and the big navy blue sweater. Joey came out of his room after throwing a sweatshirt on with his jeans and putting on some moccasins. He closed his door and reached out his hand to her, “Ready?” “No,” she grumped, but he pulled her along up the steps. “Let’s fill our mugs,” he said as he stopped at the coffee pot. “And then you wonder why I can’t sleep!” “Lady, the last thing you need to think about now is getting more sleep!” She sarcastically mimicked his words soundlessly and held out her cup. She didn’t say anymore until they were out on the patio. She started in on him, “Just what are you doing coming in to my room while I sleep! What kind of a pervert are you?” “Come on.” he pointed to his parent’s open bedroom window and then said in a hushed tone, “Let’s get away from the house so you don’t wake up the folks. Then you can yell your head off. I plan to do a little yelling myself! And I’m not a pervert. I came in when you didn’t wake up when Sam fell. I was worried.”

She snarled, “You are a real peach.” “Right back at you!” They walked over a hill east of the house and down to the creek that leisurely meandered through the pasture and found a couple old stumps they could sit on. He sat down and watched the water slowly drift by, unconcerned with the turmoil of the nearby humans. It was quite pleasant outside. It was in the low seventies, calm, and a bright partial moon. The whole sky seemed crammed with twinkling stars. Autumn looked at the sky, “I can see why people talk about the open skies. They’re quite beautiful. I imagine it’s the same on the sea, huh?” “I’d think so.” He looked at his cousin, wondering what was going on with her, “Have you ever been on a cruise?” “No, have you?” “No. Beth has been. She said she felt claustrophobic.” “Joey.” Autumn asked quietly, “Do you trust her completely?” “Of course I do, as much as a person can trust anyone. Otherwise I wouldn’t even consider marrying her.” He didn’t know if he should broach the subject but figured he might as well since most of their boundaries had been completely trampled to smithereens. “I imagine you felt that way about Brad.” “I did,” then she teared up, “I thought everything was almost perfect.” Joey watched her as she tried to stop herself from crying and reached into his sweatshirt pocket to retrieve a handful of tissues. He handed them to her and smiled, “I came prepared.” She smiled slightly and took them. “I don’t think I need that many.” “The sweater has big pockets!” She put all but one in a pocket and then said quietly, “I have to be careful not to stretch the pockets out of shape. I borrowed this from a dear friend but he

warned me not to ruin his sweater.” “Sounds like he drives a hard bargain.” “He means well, but can be a real of a pain in the keister.” “I might’ve met that guy.” Joey acknowledged, “Autumn, so you know, Samuels told me to keep control of your pills. You don’t need to look for them because I have them.” She nodded, “I figured as much. Joey, I honestly was not planning to kill myself. Please believe that.” “Even if it was accidental, it would’ve the same outcome.” “I guess that’s true, but I want you to know I’d never do that. I’ve dealt with that enough for a lifetime.” He frowned, “Did you have a friend who did that?” “No, but that sort of thing can have a profound effect on people you don’t even know.” “Autumn, I really wish you wouldn’t talk in riddles. I don’t know what is going on with you. You asked if a secret can drive a person crazy? Well, I don’t know about the person keeping it, but it certainly can for someone who is trying to be that person’s friend.” “I know, Joey. I haven’t been forthcoming, but I don’t know if I can. I have to tell you though, that I have not lied.” “Oh really?” Joey said with conviction, “Not telling the whole truth can be tantamount to a lie.” “I know,” she said quietly. “I’m just afraid.” Joey cocked his head to the side, “Can you clear up something? Did you find out about Brad that day in the emergency room or at your uncle’s house?” “It’s complicated.”

“Can you just tell me why you ran out of the emergency room that day?” She was quiet for quite a while and then began to speak softly, “Before we newhires went to lunch with the , I called home and to see where Brad was. My dad said he wasn’t there right then. He had to run over to his old place to drop off his house key and see if he had any mail, but he wouldn’t be gone long. “After lunch, I went to my station in Emergency and brought my purse with me so I didn’t have to return to my locker. I put it under the counter at the nurses’ station, so I could leave right away when my shift was over. “It was a couple hours later when the ambulance brought in a threatened suicide. It was a young lady, about my age and very pretty. I was feeling badly to imagine how anyone could want to do that- especially since that day, my life held nothing but the promise of happiness. “We worked. but were losing her, when her brother barged in. He was frantic and security had to take him out of the room. The ambulance attendant was still in the room with us and explained that the brother was the one who had called it in. When they arrived at Lucille Drive, he was already frantic, mumbling, ‘I’ll kill that bastard if I get a chance!’” Joey listened carefully, “I can about imagine. Was it some guy’s fault?” The young lady took another drink from her coffee mug, “I guess that depends on one’s point of view. Anyway, Camille Smythe had left a note which her poor brother had read before he called the ambulance. We worked on her for about half an hour, but we lost her. I was standing beside the ER doctor when he told Jake that his younger half-sister had ed away. He screamed, “It’ll kill Mom to lose her daughter! How can I tell her?” “I couldn’t handle that either,” Joey said. “Was it that emotion what made you run out of there that day?” “Oh no. I’d seen similar things before and while I don’t like it, I can deal with it. But while he was talking, her brother dropped the suicide note from his hand. I picked it up and was going to hand it to the policeman. He was talking to the security guard about if Jake was in any condition to drive. I made the mistake of reading it. I threw it on the floor and freaked, grabbed my purse, and ran out of

that place. I bolted to the nearest taxi stand down the street and made a beeline out of there.” “I still don’t understand,” Joey was confused. “What was in the note that sent you over the edge?” “Well,” she wagged her head, “It said something like:

Bobby,

I cannot go on without you. I’d tried to trust you, even when you said to abort our baby. You told me to trust you until the time is right. I need your reassurance. I know I’m weak, but I can’t go on alone.

Love, Sugar Bear.”

Joey shook his head, “That’s traumatic, but I still don’t understand.” Now she was engulfed in more tears, “I’m sorry. Maybe after I talk to that doctor, I can tell you. Right now, I just can’t talk about it anymore.” Joey slumped in bewilderment and she patted his arm, “I give you my word, Joey, that as soon as I can talk about it, you’ll be the first to know.” “Your mother must know.” “Things were hectic afterwards, it was too late to tell her. So, I never did,” She shook her head no. “Joey, I need your word you won’t say anything to anyone. Okay?” “I don’t like it. I’ll give you my word, under one condition. You better talk to Samuels ASAP and tell him the whole story… today.” She hesitated and then realized that she had no recourse, “Okay, you have my

word, but just don’t push me.” “I won’t promise. The ball’s in your court, lady. Don’t hold it too long.”

10-

They sat out by the creek until they finished their coffee and the sky was beginning to turn the eastern horizon a faint shade of violet. “Sun will be up soon, and so will Ma.” Joey stood, “We better head back. She’ll be worried if we aren’t around.” “You have a great family. You are lucky, you know.” “I do know, and some wonderful friends.” Then he smiled at her, “Leaves, , I know your family, too. They’re good people. I’m sure they would do their best to understand anything you told them.” “I suppose, but they aren’t that easy to talk to. Have you ever had something that you didn’t want to discuss?” “Of course, but you have met my father, right? Do you know how well that would fly with him? Then wait until you meet the rest of the clan. If you want to keep a secret around them, you better hope that you’re settled with it in your own mind or these guys will worm it out of you.” “And then never let you get past it the rest of your life. Right?” “Wrong. These guys aren’t that way. They just want to understand what’s going on with you so they can help out if you need them. Like Marly and Byron’s little girl Ginger says, ‘You have to know your friends stuff.’” Autumn smiled, “But nobody does bad stuff around here.” “Don’t kid yourself. We have most of the big ten sins covered and definitely all those seven vices. You know, it isn’t the mistakes you make that determine the person you are, as much as what you do about them afterwards.” “That’s senseless. You mean you don’t get credit for always being good?” Joey chuckled, “I suppose we would, if anyone was always good.”

“You hang around too many preachers and priests. You sound like them.” “Things could be worse.”

They came in the back patio door as Alma was coming down the steps. “What is with you guys and the middle of the night? You can visit in the daylight, you know.” Joey grinned, “We know, Ma. It was Sammy’s fault. He fell down the last step last night.” “Did he get hurt? Good thing we had a nurse handy.” “Nah, it was no big deal,” Joey explained, “But since Old Leaves here thinks she is still on Georgia time, she wanted to go for a walk.” Alma eyes landed on her son and he knew she knew that wasn’t the whole of it. He continued, “Oh, Leaves and I have to go to town this morning, to pick up the ingredients for her pie and some other things. She should get her driver’s license changed and stuff.” “She doesn’t have to do that today, does she? I thought you’re going to help in the fields.” “I’ll stop over and tell Darrell on our way to town. I can help tomorrow or this afternoon when we get back.” Alma frowned, “I’m not going to press it now but you know how I feel about not being told the straight of it.” Autumn raised her eyebrows, “Oh Joey, tell her. Auntie Alma, I’m having a difficult time with all that’s happened. Joey was kind enough to make an appointment with this counselor guy for this morning.” “Why didn’t you just say so? What time do you have to be in?” “Appointment’s at nine.” Joey said, “We’re going to get groceries before then if we have time. Need anything?”

“I think we’re good. Let’s look over your recipe and see what you need. I know you need pecans and I’m out of them.” Alma continued, “Hey, if you see some coffee on sale, pick up a bunch. Okay? We are almost out and I would hate to have to go visiting at five AM to get a cup!” “You guys sure drink the coffee,” Autumn commented, and then looked at her empty mug. “I should talk. This must be my seventh cup today so far.” Auntie Alma laughed, “And let me guess, the only reason that you came in was to get a refill.” “I never could get one by you, Ma.” Joey laughed, “Hey. I have an idea.” Alma interrupted, “If I was you Autumn, I’d run when he says that!” “I know. I’m beginning to figure that out.” “Stifle it.” Joey scowled, “Throw on some real clothes. You and I can go help Darrell milk this morning.” “Maybe I don’t want to.” “I didn’t ask you if you wanted to.” Joey said and ran down the stairs. Alma watched him go, “Better go with him, Autumn. He won’t rest until you do. You can talk to Clarence while you’re there. It’ll be fun.” “Auntie Alma, I don’t know anything about milking goats.” “You’ll never learn any younger. Go, get dressed, and I’ll check over the grocery list. Hurry now! Oh, and don’t forget to take some eggs over for them. There are about eight dozen ready to go.” Alma had stuffed some fried ham in a bun and handed them each one on the way out. “, you’ll need to leave here before eight to make it on time.” “I know,” Joey grinned, “Thanks for the sandwich.”

They climbed into Joey’s pickup and Autumn had to giggle, “Sam was right.

Your cab’s a mess.” “If it isn’t up to your standards, I guess you could clean it.” Joey wagged his head, “In fact, that’d be a fine job for you.” She gave him a dirty look, “I wasn’t looking for work.” They drove to the corner before Autumn said anything, “You were right. Your Mom knew right off.” “I told you.” “I know you did, but-” “You didn’t believe me. It’s usually so much easier to just spit it out. Maybe that is why Eve can’t keep a secret for anything! Even a surprise birthday party. If you tell her, you might as well put it in the newspaper.” Joey grinned, “It is not that she gossips, but she has no idea how to fudge something. I love her to death, but.. The only saving grace is that she is so forgetful, she’ll only have a small window of time before she totally erases it from her mind.” “How can her husband stand it?” “Chatterbox is the best guy in the world. He is so easy going and just accepts that his little Eve is missing a few connections.” “You’re awful.” “I know, huh?” Joey pulled into a farmyard that had a newer home by the windrow of trees and a small cabin down the path from it. “Here we are. Darrell’s place. Matt and Diane live in the cabin. On this side of the road is the barn and milk tanks. That is where we’re headed.” “Don’t we have to knock on their door or something?” Joey shrugged, “No one would answer. They are all down at the barn.” “What time does this country get up, anyway?” “Animals require a certain amount of routine. You can’t milk a cow one day at

noon and then go until the next day at four. Doesn’t work.” While they were getting out of the pickup, another pickup pulled up beside them. Autumn recognized the man from lunch the other day, but not the beautiful woman with him. She was gorgeous, even in her milk clothes. She was like a snow princess, platinum blonde, icy blue eyes, and a porcelain complexion with delicate features. Joey waved at them, “Hey, Joallyn. Still hanging around this sleaze ball?” “Oh, I thought I would. Didn’t want him to be lonely.” Josh Perkins came around the front of the pickup. He had a dark complexion and movie star good looks to go with his fantastic build. The two together reminded her of Barbie and Ken. Autumn figured they must be conceited and selfcentered. She was sure she wouldn’t like them. Although Josh had seemed okay at lunch, he really didn’t say much. Josh winked at her, “I see Joey is making you work, huh? These crazy people don’t believe in letting anyone rust.” “You have to it you love it,” Joey teased. “Yah. I guess it beats relaxing on a beach by a gentle surf.” “I see your mouth going, but don’t have a clue what you are talking about,” Joey slapped his back. “I just thought I’d show this Southern gal how Yankees operate.” “Yea gads,” Joallyn crossed her eyes. Then she held out her hand to shake Autumn’s, “Hi, I’m Joallyn Frandsen, Jeannie’s sister. This is Josh Perkins, my fiancé. I’m glad to meet you. You must be Autumn, Darrell’s cousin?” “Yes.” “No, she is Leaves,” Darrell corrected her as he came out from the barn. “Whatcha guys doing standing out here? All the fun’s in there.” “Yah, yah.” Joey said. “We came to help, but also to tell you that Old Leaves and I have to go to Bismarck this morning. I’ll help in the fields this afternoon. Sorry

about this morning.” Darrell grinned, “You aren’t that much help, anyway. Don’t worry about it.” Joey squinted at him, “I would say something, but I think it is a trap.” Josh laughed, “I know it is.” The men headed toward the barn leaving the women standing there. Joallyn watched them walk away, “You know, Autumn, I can never understand what women see in those guys.” “I thought one of them is your fiancé?” “Yah, I know.” The beauty frowned and then giggled, “I still don’t get it. Let’s go find Jeannie and Tink.” When they entered the barn, Clarence looked over from where he was putting a milk machine on a goat and grinned. As soon as he was finished, he ran over to Autumn, “Hi Miss—is your name, Leaves or Autumn?” “Either is fine, Clarence,” Autumn smiled. “How is my partner this morning?” “Good. I told Missus about our deal. She said that we can practice over there if you want. She’d like to meet you. I said I would ask.” “Who is this Missus?” “My new mom, Nora Schroeder. My second mom said we have to call grownups by the proper thing out of respect, you know.” Clarence explained plainly. “It is easy, if you practice. Sometimes though, with Mr. Darrell, it is hard to tell what somebody’s name is. He never calls people the right name. Oh, did you meet Ranger and Skipper?” “I don’t believe so.” “They are here,” he motioned to two Labrador-mix dogs. “Ranger is the black one and Skipper is the yellow one, Mr. Matt’s dog. They are sisters and brother. I can show you my goats if you want? Miss Joallyn and I helped them be born. We were good helpers for them, right?”

“Yes we were, Clarence,” Joallyn smiled. “In fact, Clarence and I are a team! And his two goats are the first ones we delivered.” “They are twins and I earned them myself. I named them Hansel and Gretel. Mr. Darrell thought that was a good idea. He thinks of the most names.” Inside the barn, there was a flurry of activity. Diane waved from between the cows she was changing the milkers on and Jeannie gave Autumn a quick grin as she moved a pair of goats into the milking stanchions. Darrell came over and motioned for Autumn, “Come on Leaves, I’ll show you what goes on here.” He gave her a quick tour of the milking barn. It had the capacity to milk about 120 goats and 50 cows in two hours, with enough help. The milk went directly from the machines, through the pipes to the refrigerated tanks outside, one for cow milk and the other for goat milk. The only milk that was ever in a pail was what Darrell set aside for their use. Those cows were milked by hand. Josh and Joallyn, Matt and Diane, and he and Jeannie got their milk from there, as well as Uncle Georges’ and Kincaids. Carl was Darrell’s silent business partner, who was not really silent, but rarely did any of the physical work. Autumn did put a milk machine on a cow and a couple goats before they left. She also had pet Hansel and Gretel, who were indeed fine goats even to her untrained eye. Darrell introduced her to his herd of horses. He had quite a collection, some of which he boarded for other folks. Darrell asked if she had decided to get a horse and she grinned, “Joey and Sammy already called this horse buyer guy.” “Oh, Jerald. He’ll get you a good one. He knows his horseflesh.” “Let me guess- he is a clanner?” “He is,” Darrell beamed, “So you’ve heard about the clan. You’ll enjoy being with them. There are few finer folks you will ever meet. You’ve met a bunch of them already. Almost our whole family is clanner, so I reckon you’ll be, too.” Clarence was standing by her, “I already told Mister about it. She is tiyospaye, so she can be a clanner. It’s okay with him, if it’s okay with you.” “What is this tee-yoe thing?” Autumn asked.

Darrell explained, “You say it like tee-yoe’-schpah-yeah! It is the Sioux word for extended family… like a tribe, or clan.” Clarence took her hand, “If you don’t want to be clan, you’re still tiyospaye, because I said.” She gave the young man a hug, “Thank you Clarence. I would love to be in your tiyospaye.” “Oh, Miss Leaves, you aren’t in tiyospaye. You are tiyospaye.” “I like that. I’m so glad you’re my partner in the cookout.” “Me, too. I better go work, so Mr. Darrell doesn’t have to set me on fire.” “It is fire you, not set you on fire!” Darrell grinned, “I think you’re safe.” Autumn noticed the pride in Darrell’s eyes as he watched the boy run back to work, “You really think a lot of him, don’t you?” “I love that kid. You know, he had trouble reading when he first came here, so my Jeannie tutored him. Once he got a good start, he reads everything. He promised Matt he’d read the whole library. Matt takes him to the library in Bismarck about once a week. Isn’t that something?” “You mean, with all the other work he does?” “Yes Ma’am. That’s my boy!” After chores, Joey and Autumn headed back to the farm with their milk and cream. “That was fun. Thanks for making me come along. I was worried that Joallyn would be a snob because she is so gorgeous, but she’s not at all stuck on herself.” “Joallyn? A snob?” Joey laughed, “That’s funny. You know what Darrell calls her because she is so fair and her hair is almost pure white? Frostbite! He gives her grief steady.” “Who doesn’t he give grief?”

Joey frowned, “Can’t think of anyone right off-hand.” “Is that all those people do? Milk?” “Yah, and farm along with their other jobs. Darrell works at a Cheese Factory and Joallyn works for Chatterbox’s carpentry business.” “She’s a carpenter?” “No, she paints and wallpapers. The rest all are teachers.” “You’re kidding.” “Why would I kid about that?” Autumn made a face like ‘why indeed?’ and he had to laugh. “I guess I deserved that.” “I still can’t get over that. And Matt was a priest before? Amazing.” Autumn studied her cousin, “You were right, you know. I was ready to not talk to Joallyn, thinking she was a snob, but she seems to be very nice.” Joey chuckled, “What do you bet she’s telling Josh right now, ‘I thought Leaves might be nice, but she’s really a snob’!” Autumn was shattered, “Do you really think she thinks that?” “No,” he laughed, “But I got you going, didn’t I?”

11-

They dashed downstairs to clean up and change clothes. Before long, they were on their way to Bismarck. Autumn wore her beige pantsuit again and before they were on the main gravel road, she was beginning to feel miserable. Without realizing it, she sighed. Joey looked over at her, “Why the big sigh?” She shrugged, “This outfit makes me feel grim.” “Why don’t you just perk it up a little? You know, maybe wear a bright blouse or scarf or whatever you gals do. And a smile might help.” “Is everything so simple to you?” “Mostly. If something makes me feel grim when I wear it, I either don’t wear it anymore- or save it for when I want to be grim. You know, like if raw oysters make you throw up, you quit eating them.” Autumn scowled, “Life isn’t really that simple.” “No, but it isn’t as complicated as some people try to make it, either.” He turned his blinker on to turn onto the highway. “Autumn, while I believe that you told me the bare truth about the emergency room, I think that you left out a big part of it. Didn’t you?” She nodded. “Maybe you want to practice what you’re going to tell Samuels today. We have a long drive ahead of us, so get talking.” “You’re so annoying.” She hesitated and sat quietly for a few miles. Then started quietly, “There were a lot of things about that girl in Emergency. As soon as I came up to her, I could smell the scent of plumeria. That was Brad’s favorite perfume and he always wanted me to wear it. I know other people wear it too,

but it is rare. I almost always notice it.” “And she lived on the same street as Brad did.” Joey interjected, “I picked up on that.” “Not only the same street, Joey, but the same address! I heard the ambulance attendants talking about it.” “Oh, Leaves. Did you recognize her brother?” “No. I knew that Brad’s roommate was named Jake Harman, but I had never met him.” “I can see that’d mean Brad might have known her. Maybe she was Jake’s new roommate.” “I thought of that. Joey, I had such a horrible pit in my stomach.” “I don’t quite understand though. I know it would make me feel bad that I ran out on my new job, but it surely isn’t the only job in the world. It was completely understandable. Why did you keep it a secret.” They drove on in silence for a few miles before he looked at her, “So, there is more, right?” Autumn shook her head slightly, “I can’t right now. Please. Can we change the subject?” “Sure. Thanks for telling me that much. At least I understand why you bolted out of there.”

The pair made it to Dr. Samuels’ office only a bit early. The receptionist had Autumn fill out forms before her appointment. While she was filling out the clipboard, sitting by Joey, she said, “Oh dear. I don’t have any insurance. What should I put down?” “No problem. Put my name and I’ll pay for it.” “Are you made out of money?”

Joey said calmly, without looking up from his magazine, “Nope, but don’t worry. If you get too expensive, I’ll just shoot you.” She rolled her eyes, “It’d be funny except I believe you.” He laughed and flipped through the magazine. A few minutes later, the receptionist called her into Samuels’ office. She was in there for almost an hour when the receptionist came over to Joey. “Dr. Samuels asked that you them.” Joey grimaced and then followed her into his office. He had met the kindly looking dark-haired psychiatrist at a few clan events and always thought he was a nice fellow. He motioned for him to take the chair next to Autumn. “Autumn and I had a good visit, but I want to bring you into the loop. She expressed to me that she really doesn’t want to bother her aunt and uncle with all this, but named you as her person. Is that okay with you?” Joey shrugged, “Sure, I guess. What do I have to do?” “Just know what’s going on.” “That’s not as easy as you might think. Old Leaves isn’t too open.” “Not a surprise.” He grinned, “She told me you guys call her Old Leaves. No wonder she is seeing a therapist!” It took Joey a second to realize the man was joking, “She’s used to it.” “Actually, she trusts you and needs that right now. I also need someone I can talk to, if need be.” Samuels handed Joey an information card to fill out. “Okay. Did she tell you to send the bill to me?” “Of course,” he teased. “That’s why I really want your address.” “You enjoy your job, don’t you?” Joey scowled. “Sometimes.” Samuels took the card back. “Your cousin is in a dilemma right now and needs some help to get past the things that are bothering her. I want to

see her again soon and she needs this prescription refilled. It is for a mild tranquilizer. No more sleeping pills. I’d like you to keep an eye on her consumption, although she assured me that it was an honest mistake that she took that many last night. If I was you, I’d only give her two a day in the bottle, and keep the rest in my possession. She should take one at night, before bed. If something catastrophic happens, she can take another, but no more than two in twenty-four hours. Can you see to that?” “I can.” Joey nodded, “What if she gets all run-across-the-pasture type thing again?” The psychiatrist smiled, “She told me about that. We decided that she should take karate lessons. She needs something physical to work off her pent up emotions. She also mentioned you are getting her a horse. That will be good.” “Joey wants me to help my other cousin with milking and stuff,” Autumn offered, finally injecting something into the conversation. The doctor smiled, “I know those folks well enough to know they have things going on all the time. It would be wise for you to get involved.” “I don’t know what I want to do.” “Try it all. Then decide what you don’t like. You never know unless you give it a try.” Samuels suggested, and then looked directly at Joe, “She has promised me that she’ll tell you what is really bothering her. She needs to get it out. If she can’t tell you, she needs to talk her clergy and/or her aunt. Won’t you, Autumn?” “Yes, I’ll tell Joey. I don’t want to tell my clergyman, because that is my cousin’s husband.” “Autumn, the goal is to eventually have it just be known. , it bothers others a lot less than it does you. You are trying to protect something that doesn’t require protecting. We talked about that.” Samuels was definite, “I know the clan and none of them would think less of you. I can almost promise you.” She looked at him, “You said almost!” “Picked up on that, huh? You know, if folks were totally predictable, I’d be out of work!” Then he laughed. “At any rate, you need to do it for you. You are

letting other people’s actions ruin your life. That is a rather silly thing to do.” “I know. I honestly do know. Thank you, Dr. Samuels.” She stood, “I guess I will see you at my next appointment.” “Sooner. My wife and I will be out for the cookout. Jeff and Kathleen invited us. They want our votes or something.” Autumn was surprised, but smiled, “You have to vote for Clarence and me.” “Joey, can I vote more than once?” Joey smiled, “You can vote in each category. If you see Cowboy Brisket, it is mine! If I only get two votes, I will know you didn’t vote for me.” “Maybe one of them will be mine?” “No. Sammy and I will vote for us. We know that.” “What if you get one vote?” Joey froze at that thought, “Now that could be predicament.” Dr. Samuels crinkled his brow, “Maybe you should consider someone else as your person, Autumn. I think he might be my next patient!” “You don’t have enough training for me!” Joey laughed. “Thank you so much, Dr. Samuels. I really appreciate you getting us in so soon. I didn’t know what to do.” “You did exactly the right thing.”

12-

Joey wrote out a check for her appointment and they climbed back in his pickup. She was very quiet after they left Samuel’s office. Once in the pickup, she said, “I’ll pay you back; every cent, Joey. I promise.” He smiled broadly, “I know, but don’t worry about it. If you do, you will stress and it’ll cost me more to get you unstressed.” She crossed her eyes, “You’re such a jackass.” “I try hard,” he chuckled. “Let’s drop that prescription off at the pharmacy and get groceries. Then, if you play your cards right, I’ll buy you breakfast.” “You are so nice.” “Harrumph! Didn’t sound like that two seconds ago!” They decided to stop at Dakota Kitchens for breakfast, since it was near the pharmacy. They had Swedish pancakes with real lingonberry jam. While they were lingering over their coffee, Joey asked, “Was Samuels helpful?” “Yes and surprisingly easy to talk to. I didn’t really know what to expect, but he put me at ease right away.” Autumn looked at her cousin, “You know, I don’t trust many people anymore. He said I should begin to rebuild that, since life isn’t easy if a person doesn’t have at least one confidant. A person shouldn’t just blindly trust everyone, but we all need somebody. I figured you’d be a good start.” Joey listened thoughtfully and surprised her when he responded seriously, “I’m very honored that you think enough of me to be the one you want to trust.” It almost brought tears to her eyes, “That’s a wonderful thing to say.” “Please don’t go all Niagara Falls in here! Everybody will think I did something to you!” he grimaced, as his eyes glanced around the room.

“I won’t. It was just that it was sweet of you.” Joey self-consciously changed the subject, “By the way, I didn’t tell you to help with chores at Darrell’s. Though I’m sure he would like the help especially while Rain is under the weather.” “I know, but Darrell asked me if I wanted to. Oh, am I going to sign up for my driver’s license?” “Yah, we should do that today. Then I suppose you will want to be driving my rig all over.” Autumn scrunched up her face, “I was thinking maybe I’d borrow Uncle George’s car.” He shook his head, “How about we stop at Elton’s gas station to see if they have an old beater—that’s clean—you could borrow?” “Why would he have one?” “Schroeders own and operate a couple garages, one in Merton and one here in Bismarck.” Joey nodded, “In fact, we could buzz over there after breakfast and ask Keith if he knows of a good car.” “Keith?” “He is one of Elton’s boys.” “Just how many does he have?” “A bunch. Some are related and some are just his kids.” “I’m not even going to ask.” “Now you are catching on!” Joey finished his coffee, “Come on, Leaves. I need to get home so I can get out to the fields and help those fellers. You know, if you want to work off your tension or whatever, I can arrange for you to help.” “I’m sure, but maybe I should spend some time with Auntie Alma today.” “Ma is a good listener, in case you forgot.”

They pulled up in front of the Schroeder and Sons gas station and garage on Main Street and parked. Joey started to get out and Autumn hesitated, “I didn’t know you meant right now.” She gave him a dirty look and got out of the pickup, “I don’t have any money right now.” “Not to worry, I’ll get you a job at this topless t I heard about!” He laughed, “Heard the tips are out of sight!” Inside, Joey asked if Keith was around and in a few minutes, a young man in his early thirties appeared. He was nice looking with dark brown hair, kindly brown eyes, and sporting a big smile, “Well, Joe, you old buzzard! What brings you in here?” Then he looked at Autumn, “Who is this fine young lady you have with you?” “My cousin from Georgia, Autumn Simms, but we call her Leaves.” “That figures.” Keith laughed as he extended his hand to her, “I’m Keith Schroeder. Welcome to North Dakota. Come back to my office and I will see if I can drum up a cup of coffee. Or maybe you want a Coke?” “That sounds good,” Autumn nodded, “We just had breakfast and coffee.” Keith chuckled, “In this country, a person can never have too much coffee!” “I’m learning. I think I’ve had about twelve cups of coffee already today.” “Coke, Seven-Up, or what’s your fancy?” Both answered Coke and Keith opened the pop machine and removed three bottles. Then they all sat in his office. “When did you arrive?” “A couple days ago.” Joey got right to business, “She is in the market for a car.. just something that runs on wheels. I was going to lend her mine, but can you believe- she thinks the cab isn’t tidy enough for her?” Keith crinkled his eyebrows, “And just how did that surprise you?”

“I might just have to take my business elsewhere,” Joey grumped. “Joey, everyone knows your cab is like a basket of dirty laundry!” “Well, if that isn’t rude!” Keith laughed and ignored his huffing, “Let’s see. Out in back, we have two cars. One is an Oldsmobile Cutlass. The other is a Ford, but I’m not sure it didn’t have a bent frame. Let me check with Tony.” Keith went out to talk to one to men and returned, “Tony said that is only good for parts. The chassis is all bent up. So, guess I have the Cutlass. It is a soft yellow. Good color for a girl, but it will need seat covers. Want to see it?” They all went to the shop yard and saw the car. The paint job was good, but Keith pointed out it need a major tune up and new back tires. “I can bring it out for you this weekend, if you want.” Autumn stammered, and Joey asked, “What, Leaves?” “I don’t drive a stick shift.” “This is an automatic, rear-wheel drive. I’ll let you test drive it on Saturday when I bring it up. A person has to see if they feel comfortable in it.” Keith grinned. “Don’t feel obligated. We can find you a different one if this isn’t for you.” Joey walked all around it and he and Keith looked under the hood. For her part, Autumn opened the door and looked at the interior. The front seats were stained purple, but they were in good shape. The dash was nice, it smelled fresh and the windows were good. “Have a sit and see if it fits,” Keith smiled. She got in and it did feel good. “I like it and it feels comfortable. I have to ask, do you know what stained the the front seats?” “Chokecherry wine!” Keith laughed. “The man told me they were carrying two ten gallon water bottles of chokecherry wine to a wedding dance when someone rear-ended them. Drenched the whole seat in wine!”

“Is that why they sold it?” Joey asked. “No, he said the car was only a couple months old then. The car is a couple years old. They just had a little one and decided they wanted a four-door. This is a two-door.” “Cool. What do you think, Old Leaves? Can you see yourself in it?” Autumn’s eyes searched her cousin’s, “I don’t know. What do you think?” “Well, you can’t borrow Mom and Dad’s all the time and you wouldn’t be caught dead driving mine, so your options are limited.” Joey pointed out, “Besides, I’m buying it, so what I say goes.” “It is really nice,” she groaned. “Okay,” Keith grinned, “I’ll bring it up on Saturday afternoon. We need two vehicles anyway, because we’re bringing up a bunch of stuff for the cookout. Did you hear about that, Autumn?” “Yes, in fact, Darrell signed me up for mud pies!” “Clarence is her partner,” Joey added. “I hope they’re better than the ones she used to feed us kids. I hate it when gravel sticks between your teeth!” After that, they went to get her permit and booklet for the drivers’ test at the Capital building, picked up her prescriptions at the pharmacy, and then stopped at the grocery store on the way out of town. As they were heading down the road, Autumn asked, “How much do I owe you for today? I can have Dad send me some money.” “Like hell. I like having you beholding to me! Now, you can clean out my pickup cab so I don’t have to hear about it anymore. Got it?” “Joey. That’s not even near right.” “You want change, besides? This pickup isn’t that dirty!” Joey retorted. “I only want a few things from you. One to get better and two to be happy. Besides, I know you’ll pay me back for the doctor’s appointments when you can and the car will be in my name. That way I can insure it and stuff. When we get sorted

around, you can decide if you want to buy it or not. Okay?” “You’re the best.”

They got home just as Ma and Pa were finishing lunch. Joey and Autumn brought in the groceries and then went to change into their work clothes. She had just slipped on her blue jeans when there was a knock at the door. It was Joey, “Hey, do you have something to keep some pills in?” “They’re in a bottle.” “I know, but I’ll leave two for you and store the others. That way you won’t make a mistake again.” “I won’t.” “I know you won’t. You’ll only have two. I can give you another one tomorrow.” “Aren’t you overreacting?” “No, I’m not.” He didn’t take the bait, “I’m protecting my investment.” “Oh good grief, come in. I think I have a pill case here for aspirin.” She rummaged through her purse and got it out. It was a pretty metallic case with a rose carved on the top, which she emptied. “Here, Mr. Fuss Butt.” He grinned and dropped the two pills into the case. He gave her a hug as he snapped it shut, “Now we’re both happy. See you tonight.”

13-

Alma was a sweetheart and never questioned Autumn about her doctor’s appointment. Uncle George did, but he only asked if she liked Samuels. “Yes, he was very nice.” “Seems like it. I’ve met him. He sure helped our little Gopher.” The man leaned back in his rocker, “That little thing could curl up smaller than a mite when she was frightened! Hard to believe it is the same kid today. Now she even colors! When she first came here, the sight of a crayon would terrorize her!” “Crayons?” Autumn asked. “Carrie’s husband, Kevin, and some of the clanners went down South to try to find out as much as they could about her life with those wacko parents. They discovered when she was left in that crib with her dying brother, her thoughtful mom left a box of crayons with her.” George rolled his eyes, “I guess she figured to give her something to do while she waited for her brother to die. Beats the hell out of me! At any rate, the girl developed a horrible fright of crayons. It was a struggle to get her out of it. But, this old clan got right on it. That Kevin is Gopher’s hero. He would do anything for that kid and vice versa. She calls him Son.” “Why is that?” “Because she heard Elton call him that, so she did. She thinks Carrie is ‘their’ Carrie and baby Holly is ‘her’ baby.” George smiled, “We were all a bit worried that she might be jealous when Holly was born, but she wasn’t a bit. She thinks that she is her own. She is quite the character. Marly’s kids were very good with her, even Little Charlie. They taught her all the things that kids need to know, like how to drive their parents crazy. Little Charlie is a master at that!” “I met him at Marly’s with that little CJ, right? CJ is Clarence’s brother?” Autumn tried to remind herself. “Now I met a Keith in Bismarck today.”

“He is Kevin’s brother,” Uncle George nodded. “How did you meet him?” “Joey is buying a car from him for me to drive. He was afraid that I might borrow his!” Autumn giggled. “I told him that’d never happen, but he said I couldn’t swipe yours either. He is getting one for me. I can buy it from him if I want.” George wagged his head, “That boy usually doesn’t have both oars in the water. However, he might have a good idea this time. It’ll give you a bit of independence so you don’t have to hang around Old Alma all day.” “What do you mean?” Alma frowned, “I beg your pardon! I’ve hardly seen her since she got here!” “I know,” Autumn answered, “I’m very sorry about that.” “Well, don’t be.” Alma winked, “We don’t want to wear on each other! Oh, Jen invited us for dinner tonight. You haven’t had a chance to meet their Baby Matt.” “That’ll be nice. Auntie Alma, do you need any help with anything?” “Let’s see, I’d appreciate it if you’d go pick some fresh lettuce from the garden. I told Jen I would bring salad for tonight.” “Point me the way.” Uncle George got out of his chair, “I have a better idea. I’ll go with you, so you don’t get lost.” Autumn grinned, “That sounds good.” Before long, Autumn and her uncle were down at the acre of garden. “Think this is big enough?” she giggled. “Just barely,” Uncle George chuckled, “There is a lot of canning and freezing in this pile of dirt. Not to mention the sweet corn and potatoes take up room.” “There is only the two of you.” “Ah, count again, Sweetie. You may want to use your whole hand this time.

There are five full-timers, plus folks in and out all the time.” “Is that too much for Auntie Alma? That’s a lot of work,” Autumn observed. “Family and friends can be, but that’s what life is all about. Elton Schroeder says every guy needs a landing strip when you get your wings clipped!” Then the man laughed, “It is hard to say every morning whether you are going to be the air traffic controller or the pilot flying on empty!” She stopped while he said that and watched him as he pulled a stray weed from the lettuce row, “I think you really believe that. I’ve heard that kind of thing a lot since I’ve been here.” “I guess,” the man never looked up, “Hey, want to start at that end of the row? I’m going to check the radishes. Some of them were getting woody.” They brought the vegetables in and Sammy was getting up for the day. “Hey, Old Leaves. How’s it going?” “Good,” she grinned at her cousin. “How’s the foot?” “Bruised, but not swollen. I stepped on my one foot with my other one.” Uncle George made a contorted expression, “How on earth did you do that? I’ve never heard of anyone ever doing that before!” “I’m a trailblazer. What can I say?” Sammy grinned. “Leaves, Ma tells me you’re invited out tonight, so wanna walk down to the barn with me now? We can visit for a few minutes, before I go to work.” “Okay, if Auntie doesn’t need me.” Alma shook her head, “Run along. I’m just going to rinse this lettuce.” Sammy and Autumn walked to the barn, “Has Joey been keeping a good eye on you?” “Yes. He’s very watchful,” Autumn nodded. “Did you guy flip a coin over whose going to watch out for the crazy chick from Georgia?”

“No. We both want you to get back to yourself, so we can rag on you!” “Sweet of you.” “That was a rotten piece of luck, what happened to Brad. I can’t imagine how I could handle it if something like that happened with Bonnie.” He pushed the barn door open, “I suppose, we all have things like that to deal with before we check out of this old world. For what it’s worth, I think you’re doing well.” “Probably not as well as you think,” Autumn explained. “Joey was kind enough to take me in to see Dr. Samuels this morning. Sam, I don’t have it together at all.” “I’m glad he set you up with Samuels. Was he helpful?” “Yes, he was. I see him again soon. He told me I need to talk about the entire fiasco and get it out in the daylight. I’m not sure I want to do that.” “I know that’s what they tell almost everyone. Keeping stuff buried only works for hidden treasure and you know, as long as it’s buried- you really can’t spend. So, if you can’t spend it- you are just as broke as before, so why bother?” Autumn made a face, “Everyone up here talks like that!” “Like how?” Sammy asked as he opened the oats bin. “Here, grab a pail and we can get this all done in one trip. Did Jerald call about the horse yet?” “Not that I know of. Joey asked Keith to bring me a car this weekend.” “Good, I was thinking about that last night. A gal needs wheels up here. It is a long way between places.” They closed the oats bin and carried the pails to the corral. Sam opened the gate and then whistled. She stood next to him, looking over a rise in the prairie. “What are we doing?” “Waiting for the horses. If they didn’t hear me, I’ll just start the tractor. That always brings them. Do you know how to whistle loud? I’ll teach you because then you can call them.”

“Why would I do that?” “So they know to come get oats.” Sam watched and then broke into a grin as he saw the heads of the horses coming over the hill. “And here they are.” “How many do you have?” “We have seven in the pasture right now, but only two are ours. We keep some for Jerald as he moves them in and out. The others we are boarding for some folks from Bismarck. They thought they really wanted them, but only get out here to see them about once a month in the summer and less in the winter. The horses hardly know them at all! Sorta a waste to my notion.” “I actually rode with Joey on Cheetah. Which one is yours?” “Evinrude. She is that dark brown one over there, with the white front legs.” “You named your horse Evinrude? Like the boat?” “Outboard motor to be precise. I could either afford the outboard or the horse. Jerald gave me a good deal on the horse, so I just named her Evinrude. That way, I got everything I wanted,” he grinned. Autumn grimaced, “Does your horse pulls your boat through the water?” “Don’t be silly. That’s what I got Bonnie for. That girl can really paddle.” She laughed, “I didn’t see a lot of water around here.” “You will. Joey and I already plan to take you fishing with us at Garrison Dam, fifth largest dam on the planet. Lake Sakakawea is huge and it has some big old fish in there. You’ll love it!” “I’m not much of a fisher person.” “Not yet!” He laughed, “You will be. Joe and I go every chance we get. We take Dad along, too when he is feeling well enough. He is doing better here lately, but it was tough going for a while there. I glad you’re here to help Ma.” “I’ve hardly been around at all.”

“So far. You will.” Sammy rubbed Evinrude’s nose, “I can’t wait until you can get a horse for riding. We can have a great time. The whole gang gets together every so often, but even if it is just us. I feel bad for folks that live their whole lives in big cities and never have the feeling of being alone with nothing but grass and sky.” “It is nice.” Autumn acknowledged, “But I don’t think it is therapeutic.” “It is. Trust me.” “I need to ask you something, seriously. Do you think Joey is someone you can trust? I don’t mean love, I mean trust.” “Yes. I do. He’s never let me down about anything important. Now, as far as the little stuff, he is Captain Flake City.” Sam patted his horse thoughtfully before he answered, “Joey is good soul and easier to talk to than me. I tend to make quick judgments and decisions, while Joey is more of a muller. He can mull on something for days. Man, I’m so over it by the time he’s done thoroughly pondering, I’ve forgotten the issue.” Autumn giggled, “Are you a little like Eve?” “That was a low blow, Leaf Pile!” He crossed his eyes, “I love my baby sister, but she can’t long enough to ponder. Anyway, yes. He is trustworthy.” “Can I ask you something and will you give me a totally honest answer?” “No point in answering if it’s not completely honest.” She became very busy patting Cheetah’s neck, “Do you think, like a person. Well ..mostly a guy, can love two women at once and like, really love them both?” He studied her face, “Better watch it before you rub Cheetah bald!” He turned the oats buckets over and motioned for her to take a seat, “I’ve heard that they can. I guess it depends on the definition of love. I mean I love a lot of gals, but that doesn’t mean that I want to make a commitment to them. I can love their sense of humor, looks, attitude, and so on, but if you are talking about the kind of get married-forever, can’t-survive-without kind of love, I’ve only felt

that way twice. Once, the lady had a different idea and then there is Bonnie.” “I imagine Bonnie is the best of all of them, huh? The most fun, beautiful, and all that.” The man plucked a piece of grass and studied it, “No. Not really. She is alot of those things, but not the best of each, but she is real deal. Sometimes I think she is a dufus and sometimes, she looks like she crawled out from under a rock, but I always know somehow that it’s a rock I want to be under, too. I don’t have to pretend and she doesn’t either. We like each other in spite of all our faults. I have never had that relationship with anyone before. I think this is real love. Now Francine, I idolized. It was likely more infatuation. I realize that now, but I never really felt totally comfortable around her. I always felt I was never worthy of her. I was always trying.” “Don’t you think a person should try to please the person he loves?” “Of course, but you have to know that when you have your less than stellar days, that person won’t toss you to the curb!” He grinned, “You know, like your parents. I mean, they’ve seen you at your best, worst, broke out in a rash, teeth missing, dirty drawers, and runny nose. They still keep you and can be happy when you get a gold star on your spelling test. True, not all folks are lucky enough to have parents like that, but many do. You must , human beings do have limits. I mean, if I came in the house and sat at the dinner table covered in manure, Ma and Pa would escort me to the door in a quick hurry.” “You are nuts.” “But my point is, once I cleaned up, they’d let me back in.” “Oh, I think I get it.” “I know that Bonnie and I are in it for the long haul. She may have to lock me in a dungeon from time to time, but I know she wouldn’t forget I’m down there.” Autumn shrugged, “But do you think she’d have an affair while you were down there?” “Doubt it.” Sammy became somber, “Bonnie and I both sewed a lot of wild oats in our time. We are both done with it.”

“Oh.” Sammy said quietly, “You sound almost disappointed. What is this really about?” “Nothing.” He raised one eyebrow and she grimaced, “I just wondered how a person should feel if the one you loved had an affair.” “However you feel is how you feel. There is no right way or wrong way. I’ve heard people tell a married woman with two toddlers and no job, to leave her philandering husband. Know what she said? ‘Why in hell would I do that? I still love him, my kids love him, and he says he loves us. If I threw him out, I’d have no father from my children and I’d be lonely for him. The girl he shacked up with doesn’t want his kids, or him, for long term. It would make a bad situation, worse.” Autumn cocked her head to the side, “I guess, uh? You know, that is the common wisdom; to just kick the bum out.” “What would you do?” She shrugged. He waited but she said nothing. Finally, he asked, “Brad?” She nodded. “Apparently you decided to stick with him, since you were getting married. How did it work out? When did you find out?” “No, Sammy. I never decided. I don’t know if I would’ve married him. I never had a chance to talk to him about it.” “Oh, Leaves, I’m so sorry,” he hugged her. “I suppose that has a lot to do with why you are having such a time with things. What did Dr. Samuels say?” “I never told him about it. I never told anyone and don’t want you to, either.” Sam made a face, “Autumn Beatrice Simms! You must tell him. You can’t expect him to fix your broken toy if you don’t give him all the parts!”

She stood up, “It was a mistake to tell you. Forget it, okay?” “Nope. It’s in my head now, so I won’t forget it. What exactly were asking me, anyway?” “I guess I just wondered if he really did love me or if it was all a game to him. I guess you wouldn’t have any way of knowing, would you?” “No, but I think you do. You have to know that he cared about you some. You guys went together for a lot of years. Had he said he didn’t want to get married?” “No. He didn’t.” She looked frantic, “I think we better get back.” “Yes, I do have to get to work. You had better not wait to talk to Samuels. You come clean to the folks or Joey. I’ll give you until tomorrow to do it. I will want to know when I get home. If not, I’ll drag you back into Samuels.” “I bet he just loves people dragging patients into him, huh?” “I don’t think he does.” Sammy picked up the pails, “That’s your assignment. I won’t wake you up when I get home but if you’re up, like you usually are, I will ask. Count on it. You may have until tomorrow afternoon when I get up. I’m not messing around. I mean it.”

14-

The family arrived at Jen and Danny’s place. Jen greeted them at the door and Jen gave Autumn a big hug. “I was feeling left out. Dan and Brett both got to see you, and I hadn’t yet! I hope my nutty brothers aren’t driving you bananas!” “No more than usual,” Autumn smiled. “Excuse me! I didn’t hear you ask if she was driving us crazy?” Joey interrupted. Jen crossed her eyes, “Like I would do that! Autumn, I’d like you to meet our little one, Matt. He is two plus and keeps us busy!” The little boy with dark curly hair and sparkling deep blue eyes toddled over to her, “Hello.” “Well, hello yourself!” Autumn knelt down to his height, “You look like you have spunk!” “Batman spunk!” he nodded, smiling happily. “Are you Batman?” “Me, Batman!” He nodded, made some sort of motor sound and then took off running with his arms spread out like an airplane. Joey looked his sister, “I think the kid is mixed up with Superman.” “Lord only knows,” Jen laughed. “Would you like some lemonade, iced tea, or soda pop?” “Ice tea sounds good,” Autumn smiled. Alma agreed, “Can I help you with something?” “No. We are just waiting on the guys. This salad looks good.”

“I can go give them a hand,” Joey offered. “No need. They should be almost finished.” “Maybe they are waiting for my advice,” George grinned. Just then the door opened, Danny greeted them, “I am, but I came up to get it. I wouldn’t want you to have to trudge through a cow pie to give it!” “Isn’t he a fine son-in-law?” George teased. While the men were washing up, Batman came over, and stood with one arm around Brett’s leg until he was finished drying his hands. Brett hung the towel and picked up the kid, “How’s my Batman?” “Batman cook. It’s hot! Careful, Batman.” “Did your Mommy tell you to be careful?” The boy nodded vigorously, “Batman soooo careful.” They sat down to a wonderful dinner of roast beef, mashed potatoes, spinach, and salad. Then Jen brought out the dessert. “I made your favorite, Dad. Coconut Cream pie!” George Jessup beamed, “I do love that stuff. What about you, Batman?” The boy held up his pointer finger and announced, “Whip!” “What is he saying?” Autumn asked. “Watch,” Danny grinned as he set a small piece coconut cream pie down in front of the boy on his high chair tray. The instant the pie plate hit the tray, the little guy’s finger was fist deep in the whipped cream. Autumn laughed, “I think that is a big yes.” George bragged. “He is a fine grandson.” Danny gave Jen a sneaky grin, “Can I?”

She nodded and her husband said, “We have something to tell you. Brett knows, but we don’t want to blab it all over yet and steal any of Marty and Greta’s thunder with their little one. We are expecting in late March!” There was jubilation at the table and then George asked, “So, do you want a boy or a girl?” Dan answered, “Whatever the good Lord sends us! I do hope that the new one is a bit less adventurous than Batman!” Alma snickered, “Good luck! With you two as parents, chances are slim!” “I know,” Dan had a somber expression, “That’s what happens when you get those Jessup genes in there.” George raised his eyebrows, “I don’t know about that. I’ve seen some Schroeder genes that are a bit questionable!” Dan smiled, “I guess that might be true. It is easy for me to forget because I am so flawless.” Jen looked at her father, “I can’t believe that you drug me all the way down that aisle and handed me over to this lunatic.” “Well, you know Girl,” her dad teased, “It would’ve been mighty hard to turn down that generous dowry of a lame mule and a stack of moldy hay.”

After dessert, they all walked over to the karate dojo to show it to Autumn. Joey took the initiative, “Leaves will be g up when you guys start up again. When will that be?” Brett answered, “After the cookout, but it’ll be spotty again until school starts. You know, there is so much going on around here.” “That’ll be good,” Joey announced. “That way, Old Leaves can get started before everyone sees how out of shape she is. She’s really let herself go.” Even Batman looked at him in shock, but Autumn just whacked Joey.

Batman looked at Brett aghast, “’Streme measures!” “You got that right, Batman!” Brett laughed, “Here I thought I was dense when it came to girls! Which reminds me, I’d better get down to the Patch to see Rain. I’m sure she has driven Mo to utter distraction by now.” “How is she doing?” Alma asked. “She’s better, but you know Lightnin. She doesn’t like being grounded.”

The rest visited for an hour or so before calling it a night. Then they said their goodnights and headed home. They went right off to bed, but within a couple minutes, Autumn knocked at Joey’s bedroom door. He was surprised and asked “Yes?” “Will you go for a walk with me?” “Sure, want to talk?” “No,” Autumn answered honestly, “But Sammy told me if I didn’t he was going to drag me back to Samuels’ tomorrow!” “What happened?” then he thought a second, “I hate to disturb the folks. Want some coffee?” “No coffee. I think Coke would be good.” A few minutes later, they were walking over by the creek. Joey carried the cola’s and Autumn wore the navy blue sweater with the pockets bulging with tissues. They found their stumps from the previous visit and sat down. Joey opened the Cokes and handed her one. “So, why did Sam threaten to do that?” “He and I walked out to the horses this afternoon and I let something slip. He made a major deal out of it. I think he overreacted, but he said I had to talk to you. He asked if I had told Samuels and I said no. He got very upset about that!” “I can understand that. I thought you promised to tell him all of it.”

“I didn’t think it mattered, but Sammy said I better tell him the whole thing. He was pretty mad about it.” “Sometimes Sammy reacts quickly, but it sounds right to me. How can he help you if you don’t say what’s bothering you? Anyway, no matter. We can talk now, okay? After all, it can’t be that horrible.” She nodded, becoming very interested in the water in the creek flowing by. Joey watched her sitting there mum as granite, “Am I supposed to just absorb your vibes here, or what? You’re going to have to lay it out because I’m not the crispiest cracker on the plate.” “I just asked him about how a person should feel when someone they loved was unfaithful to them and he said there was no one answer,” then she fell silent. “He’s right. Each situation is different.” Joey agreed, “You really thought that girl had a relationship with Brad, didn’t you?” “Yes. I knew it.” She nodded, “For a minute, I talked myself out of it, because she had written ‘Bobby’, but Brad’s given name was Robert Bradley Vander Vorst, Jr. He was called Brad because his family didn’t like Junior. But I also knew that in Atlanta at his work, folks called him Bob. So, that just made sense.” “So that clinched it for you?” “Not as much as when she signed it Sugar Bear. That was what he used to call me.” She looked to Joey for and almost wailed, “How could he do that?” Joey put his arms around her and let her cry, “I don’t know what makes folks do what they do. He was an ass. Never met the man, but doubt I’d have liked him.” “You don’t get it, Joey,” Autumn began to settle down, “Everyone did like him. His family, my family, and our friends all thought he was the cat’s meow. He was good looking, kind, bright, polite, and hard-working. He was the picture of the true American all-around hero. He was the toast of our little hamlet.” “Guys like that can have a sleazy side. I’ve seen it before.” “See? This is why I didn’t say anything. No one would have believed me!”

“Oh now Leafy Spurge, I believe you. Very much so.” Joey sat down again, “I take it when you told your family, no one believed you?” “I never told them.” She sat down trying to regain her composure, “When I got back to the house after fleeing the emergency room, no one was home. They had all gone to take stuff over to the apartment. That was good because I was a mess. I bet the cab driver thought I was an escapee of an asylum or something. I ran upstairs and took a shower. While I was scrubbing, I was thinking of all the things I’d say to him. I couldn’t believe that not only did he have an affair with her, but that he talked her into having an abortion! It soon degenerated into what I would beat him with.. a crowbar or a hammer. I was so angry, Joey! If I had seen him, I know at the very least, I would’ve belted him. I have no idea if I would have married him or forgiven him. I’ve never been so furious in my life.” “Makes sense to me. Likely however, once you started talking to him, you would’ve calmed down.” “I don’t know if I would have. You know, he had always talked about loving children and wanting a big family, but he pushed this Camille into having an abortion! I didn’t want to him to think he did that for me! He said he loved me, but all the while, he was carrying on a long-term affair with her! It was more than a one night stand. He must have just broken up with her that morning, or did he? Maybe he just wanted to continue carrying on after we married. The note mentioned ‘until the time was right.’ Was he conning her or lying to me? At any rate, I was a mess and grateful no one was at the house when I got there. “I finally managed to get angry enough to quit acting like the fountain of despair. I got dressed and was determined to have it out with him. I honestly think at that point, I only had hate in my heart for him. I hated everything about him. How could he be so callous and deceitful? “The phone rang and I actually hoped it would be him. I’d tell him to come pick me up so we could go somewhere to talk. Then I’d let him have it. I answered the phone and there was this man trying desperately to control his voice asking for Brad. He said, ‘This is Jake Harmon. It is imperative I talk to Brad right away. Something horrible happened that he needs to know.” “The girl’s brother? What did you say to him?” Joey gasped in shock. “I said that he wasn’t there and the man’s voice began to shake and become

threatening, ‘You tell that son of a bitch to get his selfish ass over here to see his handiwork!’ I tried to calm him down, but he was too emotional. He said, ‘If I get a hold of him, I’ll make sure that pompous bastard knows the pain he has caused! He is going to pay for this! I’ll beat him to a bloody pulp!’” Autumn stopped talking, straightened her posture, and a different expression came over her face. It was one of resolve. She said, “That’s when I did it. Joey, I was atrocious.” “What did you do?” her cousin stared at her, “There is nothing so far that isn’t totally understandable.” “I had watched helplessly while the life left the body of that woman who obviously loved him, I heard the anguish in her brother’s voice, and I knew my own devastation. It was all of his doing. And he was trotting around like the happy hero! At that point, I hated Brad more than I knew I was capable of hating anyone. I wanted him to pay for the lives he had wrecked, as much as Jake did. I wanted him hurt and humiliated. So, I made a very conscious decision.” She took a sip of the Coke, “Joey? Have you ever done something that you knew was seriously wrong? Something that you knew you shouldn’t do, but determined to do anyway? And all the while you were doing it, you knew it change things forever?” “I guess I’ve thought about it, but never have. But what could you do?” “I became calm and purposefully told Jake that if he wanted Brad to see him, he’d better not threaten his life. I pointed out that Brad wouldn’t come within ten feet of him, if he did that. Jake was upset enough to not wonder why I was saying this or even ask who I was. All he did was ask, ‘What should I say to him?’ I told him, very deliberately, ‘Appeal to his superior-savior side. Ask him to help you. Tell him you need him. Beg him for his help. You know he’ll come over then. Once he’s there, then you can let him have it.” She started to cry and Joey put both his hands on his head, “You did that?” She nodded, “Know what else? I didn’t say so, but in my heart, I truly wanted Jake to beat the hell out of him. I had this idea that while he was recuperating, I would tell him what a slimy cad he was, break it off with him, and everyone would know he was a no good creep. Vander Vorst’s golden boy would have lost his luster.”

“Jake agreed he could lure him over that way and I calmly hung up the phone. Wanna know the truth?” The young woman sighed, “I actually smiled to myself thinking of Brad getting beat to a pulp. I was looking forward to him trying to explain it to his parents.” Joey had to it, he was taken back. He really didn’t think that his cousin would do something that calculating. He reached over and squeezed Autumn’s hand. “Say something,” she quietly pleaded. “I was just thinking I wouldn’t have conned someone into beating him up. I would’ve just done it myself.” Autumn gave him a weak smile, “Guess I should’ve known karate then?” “Maybe it’s a good thing that you didn’t.” She shrugged, “Instead, Joey what I did was use someone else to doing my dirty work. I was behaving as badly as Brad. Anyway, I started to pull myself together and tried to figure out what to do. I had ruined my job, so there was no reason to stay in Atlanta. I’d find a job elsewhere and get away from there.” Joey frowned, “It still doesn’t make sense. I mean- what actually happened?” “It was about an hour later when everyone, Vander Vorst’s included, returned to house where we were staying. That is, everyone but Brad. They were all talking about how Brad’s former roommate called in distress because of a death in his family and asked for Brad assistance. They were commenting how selfsacrificing Brad was to cut into his own wedding plans to help a friend in need, but then that was just like him! He was so self-sacrificing and wonderful. I never said a word, but was seething inside. “Mother might have sensed something wasn’t right with me, but we didn’t have a chance to talk alone. We were just getting to the table when the patrolman came to the house. He asked for Vander Vorst’s and said they had found Brad’s car at the bottom of a craggy ravine. He was dead on the scene, he was badly smashed up and nearly unrecognizable in the wreckage. There was no apparent reason for the crash except maybe driver-error, although a nearby homeowner thought that he may have seen a green car swerving, almost forcing Brad’s car

off the road. They found nothing to confirm that and the homeowner didn’t see the car well enough to get a better description. The police felt he took the curve too fast and lost control of his vehicle. It careened off the embankment.” Autumn looked at Joey, with a dead expression in her eye, “Joey, I knew in my gut there was a car and I knew who was driving it. Brad had told me a couple weeks before that at the end of the school year, he would have a new wife and Jake would have his new green machine! He had bought a used green 1969 Firebird. I never said a word to the policeman. Not one single word. All I could think was, ‘Good. The bastard got what he deserved!’” They sat quietly for a time listening to the water leisurely beginning its journey to the river. In the distance was a night owl announcing its presence to anyone who cared. The sky was sparkling with stars and only a few clouds were on the horizon. The wind was calm and it was pleasant. It was a gorgeous evening. Joey sat dumbfounded. He truly wished that she had just told Samuels and not him. He made a mental note to never tell someone they could tell him anything. He didn’t know what to think or how to react. He wasn’t even certain that she had done anything wrong, but he knew, it wasn’t right. However, he understood why. He went over to her, took her hand, and gave her a big, comforting embrace. “You must be going through hell.” Then she cried as if her heart was broken. The floodgates of the last six weeks had finally let go, and she was able to cry herself out. Joey was actually grateful he didn’t have to say anything, because he had not even the slightest hint of what to say or do. He actually cried himself a little. He knew it was a cry of self-pity, but he didn’t care. Now he had to decide what to do with the information. He realized that Brad was not the only one who ended up in a heap of wreckage.

15-

It took a while before Autumn settled down and then she said softly, “You hate me now.” Joey shook his head, “No, Leaves. I don’t hate you, at all. I just don’t know how to help. Now, I understand why you didn’t want to tell anyone what happened. Did you ever think of telling your parents?” “I did think of it. I know Mother would have thought it unseemly and had Dad talk to me about it. Dad would’ve made me go to the police. I know that. Jake would’ve been in trouble and I really didn’t think that was fair.” She sat down again, “That next week was the funeral and all that was awful. Everyone was so broken up over Brad’s tragic accident and moaning about the wonderful sacrifice he had given to help a friend. Even the minister mentioned it at his funeral! Honestly, you would have thought that the good Lord himself had died. I wanted so badly to just scream to everyone what a brazen pig he really was. But of course, I didn’t. “I read the obituaries in the newspaper. Camille Smythe’s column was very concise. She had lived in Atlanta for almost a year and worked at a home for serious compromised children. She was 24 and shared an apartment with her half-brother. All that was said referring to her death was that she died at a local hospital. There would be a private burial in her hometown. I did send flowers to her funeral and signed it ‘a friend.’ I would’ve gone to the service, but that was also the same day that Brad’s funeral. “Of course, his obituary was long and glorious, fit for royalty. It made me sick, but being a devout hypocrite, I attended every mind-wringing minute of it. His funeral rivaled President Kennedy’s and the sermon made him sound so magnificent, I half expected him to rise right out the coffin and ascend to heaven before us. Thank God, it is acceptable to cry at a funeral.” “You still hold a lot of bitterness toward him, don’t you?” “Yes, I do. I think I may even hate him more now than I did at the time. Here this

Camille was buried like the meager residue of society, while he had a magnificent event. Jake and I were walking around in cloaks of guilt, while he was exalted for his benevolent behavior. I had really done it! Now, I had created an idol, when what I really wanted to do was make him face his own frailties. I trapped myself in my own web. I guess it is what I deserve! “I want so much to get myself out of this corner, but I didn’t know how! Everything reminds me of him or the secrets; his, Jake’s, and mine. You know, I don’t even know if Jake had anything to do with Brad’s accident, or if it really was an accident. I don’t know if Brad was really just the victim of a misguided hallucinations of this Camille and I never gave him the chance to tell me. I made an even worse calamity out of an already huge disaster. I have no one to blame but myself.” Then she reached over to Joey, “And now, I burdened you with it all. I’m so sorry. I will understand if you don’t want to have anything further to do with me. I’m a horrible person and probably deserve to burn in hell.” Joey squeezed her hand, “I promised you I’d be here for you, and I will. I have to it I was thinking it was more the traditional ‘my life is ruined since I lost my only true love’ kind of thing. I don’t know what to tell you, kid. I do know a few things. You really need to tell Samuels the whole thing.” “Joey, what would you do?” “I don’t know.” The young man shook his head, “No, I do know. I’d go talk to my Pastor. You said Samuels told you to talk to your clergy about the questions with your faith. Didn’t he?” “Yes, but I won’t talk to Byron. He is my cousin’s husband!” “I know, he’s my brother-in-law, but I also know he’d be able to handle it.” Joey thought, “You could talk to Pastor Marv.” “But. He’s Byron’s partner. Maybe he’d tell Byron.” “I know he wouldn’t, but you can always talk to one of the priests.” “I’m not a Catholic.” Joey laughed, “Neither am I, but I wouldn’t hesitate to talk to any of them. But then, that is me. This is you. Why don’t you ponder on it and then decide?”

“Good grief, you will have me tell everyone! I should have just moved somewhere that I didn’t know anyone. I just want it all to go away!” Joey shrugged, “Do you really think you’d feel any better?” “No. God thinks I’m a murderer. He’ll never forgive me.” “Don’t give yourself so much credit. Us little earthlings haven’t managed to come up with anything yet that God can’t forgive. That I know for a fact.” Joey asked her quietly, “What do you think you should do?” “I want it all to go away.” “How is that supposed to happen?” “I’ll keep it buried until Uncle George gets better and then I’ll move away. If I start over someplace else, it will all be fine,” she nodded as if her mock confidence would convince herself. “Don’t tell me you really believe that.” Her eyebrows furrowed over her eyes, “I hate talking to you.” “Sorry, but the fact is - what happened, happened.” Joey answered matter-offactly, “It is eating a hole in you as big as the Pacific Ocean. It seems to me that you might as well resolve it sooner rather than later.” She stared at the creek, “I could just drown myself.” Joey nodded matter-of-factly, “You could. That might be good for you, but will it be good for everyone else?” “I don’t know if I care.” “I find that hard to believe.” Joey said emphatically, “I don’t think that you want to burden your family with that. I won’t let you burden my folks. It will make a profound statement alright, but no one will know what the statement was about, except me. I think most people would think you couldn’t face life without your wonderful Brad. You know, without him, your life was nothing. I really don’t think you would like that. However, it is your choice.”

“That is just rude!” “Hey woman, you’re the one talking about killing yourself!” She stood up, “Okay, so you think you’re superior to me. I get it!” “I never said that or even thought that. Don’t jump to conclusions!” Joey stopped her from tromping off, “You just need to quit doing that!” “So, now what?” She sat back down and glowered for a while, “I suppose I can talk to one of those priest, but no one from Byron’s church. Hear me?” “Yes. I do.” “Can you tell me how to go about that?” “Decide which one, unless you don’t care. There is Father Vicaro. He’s in his sixties, a nice guy with a level head. He knows a lot and would direct you in the right direction. There is Father Bart. He is a young man and understands the younger generation. He is Beth and Bonnie’s brother. Then there is Father Landers. He is about forty and used to work in a drug addiction facility in California. Most of his patients were ex-bikers, criminals, or shell-shocked veterans. Your pick.” “Do any of them hang around you guys?” “They are all clanners, if that’s what you mean. You’ve met Landers. He was to dinner at our house that day when they worked in our fields.” “Oh, that guy? I him. He has a nice smile.” “Yah, I guess he does.” “I suppose he’d be the one to talk to since he’s worked with criminals. He wouldn’t tell anyone, would he?” “Not a soul. They all have confidentiality, even at our church.” “Would he make me turn Catholic?” “No, unless you want to. My guess that’s not your most pressing concern.”

“Why do I have to talk to a minister, anyway? Can’t a psychiatrist help me?” “Sure, but I know how much your faith meant to you, so I think you want to get that straightened out. It isn’t good that you think that God won’t forgive you. That’s very hard to live with. It is a good starting point. Once you get that settled, you’ll have the strength to face whatever else you decide.” “Why do I need to do anything?” “Because you feel miserable,” Joey answered, “But you certainly don’t have to do anything.” She frowned, “I don’t think a priest would know anything about being in love, being betrayed, and all that.” “You might be surprised, Autumn Leaves. You might be very surprised.” “What does that mean?” Joey shook his head, “Look. I’m not going to drag you in to see anyone unless you say so. But rest assured, you aren’t going to commit suicide on my watch! That is the only thing that I’m totally positive about. I will haul you back to Samuels in a heartbeat. Hear me! If you won’t see a clergyman, I’ll call Samuels this morning.” The young Southern lady glared at him, “Crap.” “You really sound like a true refined Southern belle! You are such a Moldy Leaf Pile!” Joey chuckled, “Let’s go back to the house. We should get some rest. I will let Sammy know that we had a talk, but I won’t tell him everything about it. That’s up to you.” “I guess I have to live with that.” She growled cynically, “I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight. I might keep those pills myself so as not to bother you.” “Nice try, Fosdick! Ain’t gonna happen. You can take the two you have.” He held out his hand to her, “Let’s go.” They walked nearly to the house before either said anything, but when they were nearing the house, she asked, “Joey? Will you call that Landers for me and make

an appointment?” “Sure. Tomorrow morning, first thing.” “I know you might not think so, but I do appreciate you.”

That night, Autumn surprised herself. One tranquilizer was enough to calm her so she could sleep, although the fact that she was so tired may have had a lot to do with it, or maybe that she got it off her chest for the first time. On the other hand, Joey didn’t sleep at all. He tossed and turned all night, dozing from time to time but waking up when he saw a car plunging off an embankment into a heap of wreckage below. He sure hoped Autumn could figure a way to solve this mess or he would be taking tranquilizers himself.

16-

The morning was overcast and threatening rain, creating what Uncle George called good sleeping weather. Over breakfast, the four discussed their plans for the day. Joey announced that he and Autumn were going in to see Father Landers sometime that day. Auntie Alma said they were invited to Nora’s, if they would bring Clarence home. Then Autumn and he could figure out when to work on their pies. Today would be a great day, since there would be little fieldwork. Uncle George suggested that Joey call Landers and find out when they were meeting, so they could set up the rest of their plans. He did and to his chagrin, Father Bart answered. “Well, how did you know that I was just thinking about my favorite brother-in-law-to-be?” Joey crossed his eyes and lowered his voice, “What do you want? I’ll have you know, the only drawback I can see to marrying Beth- is you!” “I don’t believe that for an instant.” Bart laughed, “Anyway, aren’t you going to ask why I was thinking of you?” “Nope. I don’t want to know. I called to talk to Landers.” “Sure you can, but I will tell you why anyway.” “Whatever it is, I’m going to be extremely busy today, Slick. So, don’t even start,” Joey said emphatically. “Yah, yah.” Bart laughed, “Here is Landers.” Joey explained that Autumn’s fiancé had died a couple days before their wedding and she was having problems getting her life back on track. She needed to talk to someone, not family, but she wasn’t a Catholic. Landers offered, “I’d be glad to talk with her. Vicaro gave us the job of cleaning those bushes out of the backyard today. It does resemble the jungles of the Amazon, I will give him that. However, why Slick and I got the job, I cannot

fathom. When I suggested that Sister might want to do some gardening, she was about to break a few commandments. So, I will consider it a gift to visit with your cousin, whenever.” Landers chuckled, “Oh oh, Bart wants to talk to you.” Bart got on the phone, “Okay, here’s the deal. You can help me since you are taking away the only other helper.” “What about Vicaro?” “His idea of helping is to stand with a cup of coffee in his hand, yelling, ‘Faster, faster!’ I tell you, you have no idea what we put up with around here.” “I feel so sorry for you.” “It’s not nice to lie.” “Or whine, from what I hear. We’ll be there in about an hour. Ma wants to know if you need eggs or garden things.” Bart asked Sister Abigail, “She said she would love some. See you soon. Oh, Joey. You don’t need to bring any tools. I have plenty here for you.” “How very thoughtful!” Joey hung up, “I don’t know how that happened. Looks like I will be clearing brush at St. John’s this morning!” Auntie Alma laughed, “Well, Dad and I will pick up Clarence from Darrell’s place and go to Elton and Nora’s. We will meet up with you there for lunch. Okay?” It was just eight-thirty when Joey and Autumn arrived at the St. John’s rectory. Autumn was a basket of nerves. “Joey, this is a terrible idea. I don’t want to talk to anyone. My faith is fine and you already drug me to a shrink. You’re just overdoing this whole thing. It really is no big deal.” Joey turned off his pickup in front of the neat, red brick rectory next door to the church grounds, “If that’s true, telling Landers will be a walk in the park.” She grimaced, “How did I get wound up with you?” “About the same way I got snagged into being a groundskeeper. Get over it!”

Joey chuckled, “And try to smile. You know, you aren’t half bad looking if you brighten up a little.” “Joey Jessup! You are a terrible!” He laughed as he opened the gate to the walk, “Come on, Leaves.” Sister Abigail, in her gray habit, answered the door. She was sporting a big smile as she welcomed them in. “Joey? Is this your cousin?” “Yes, Sister. How are you today?” “I have my prayer beads out this morning. These characters around here are driving me bonkers. They act like little boys squabbling over a bucket of tadpoles!” An elderly priest with his bifocals balanced on his forehead came into the hall and held out his hand to Autumn, “Don’t mind her. She ran out of Cheerios this morning. Come in. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Two younger men came into the hall. One was about Joey’s age and wearing work clothes. He grinned, “Hi Bro! Bring your work gloves?” “Don’t Bro me and yes, I did. This is Autumn Simms, my cousin from Georgia. We call her Leaves.” Landers grinned and held out his hand, “We’ve met. I’m Landers.” She smiled weakly. Bart chuckled and offered his hand, “Don’t be embarrassed about the Leaves thing. Those guys call me Slick! Who knows why?” Joey scowled, “Ever think has something to do with your personality?” “Come, Bro. Let me show you to the backyard,” Bart snickered. “I will explain our project to you.” Vicaro shook his head, “No. I will explain it to both of you.” Landers smiled at Autumn, “I want to thank you for saving me from them!”

Autumn was wondering if she could slither out the door and make it to the train station before anyone noticed, but realized there was a slim chance of that. The priest sensed her anxiety and motioned, “We can go into the study. It is comfortable in there and away from the view of those dudes. I might have a heart attack if I have to watch that trio with a chainsaw.” Sister Abigail agreed, “Would you like some coffee or tea, Autumn?” The young lady shrugged and Landers said, “How about coffee, Sister? And some of those brownies you made?” “I will bring her one, but you just left the breakfast table! You start eating when your eyes come open in the morning and continue all day long!” “Now Sister, I have been watching it this summer. I’m slimming down.” “You have. I will give you that. But no point in back pedaling. Now is there?” Landers rolled his eyes, “How about half a brownie?” “Okay. It’s a deal.” Father Landers was a nice looking man in his early forties, five-foot ten or so, with dark hair, tanned complexion, and big brown eyes. He had a very pleasant, calm demeanor, and smiled a lot. He wasn’t at all overweight to Autumn’s notion, just not as thin as Bart, who was almost gaunt. When they got to the study, he motioned for her to take one of the two overstuffed leather chairs that graced either side of the unlit fireplace. She sat down nervously and he asked, “Maybe you’d prefer to sit by a window or light the fire?” “No, this is very nice,” she said quietly. “I guess it’s supposed to rain today and tonight.” Sister knocked at the door and Landers helped her bring in the tray. Then she went out, pulling the door behind her, while Landers placed the tray on the coffee table. He poured Autumn a cup of coffee and handed it to her. Autumn was about to cry when he smiled, “You needn’t worry about talking to me. I’m just another wanderer on this planet, looking for right trail like everyone

else. I’ve been around long enough to learn that I have to ask directions from time to time. You know, we aren’t born with a set of instructions in our pocket.” She smiled and deeply appreciated that he said that. However, she still didn’t want to be there. He went on, “Joey tells me that you are having some doubts about your faith. Was that Southern Baptist?” She shook head, “No. It was simply Christian, not really d with any of the big guys.” “That has its advantages, no doubt,” Landers chuckled. “Joey tells me that you were very active in your church.” “Yes, I was. It was always a part of my life. Most of my friends also went there. I went to the church events and Bible camp. You know, helped with things, and even taught some Sunday School. That is where I met my fiancé. He was very involved in the church, too..” “So, what is your fiancé’s name?” “His name was Brad, actually Robert Bradley Vander Vorst, Junior.” Landers smiled, “I bet he loved putting that in those little boxes on forms.” Autumn almost giggled, for the first time, “I never thought about it, but I bet he did.” “So, how long did you know Brad, then?” “From the time he was eleven until he died a few weeks ago. He was a year older than me.” “I’m sorry to hear of your loss. Is that when your faith became shattered?” “Yes and no, but not because he died. I mean, I know that people die and that doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love us. That’s not it.” Autumn continued, “You know, how some people think that if they pray, everyone in their circle will be well, prosperous, and happy forever? That isn’t the way life works. I know that many times, God allows what we think are bad things to happen only because He has reasons we don’t understand.”

“I know,” Landers agreed. “I encounter that often. People feel that if they believe whatever, it will just happen, forgetting they are only looking at it from their own narrow point of view. I have to say, that idea is a lot more fun than how it works. God promises strength and peace with situations, not perfect situations.” Autumn nodded slightly and then stared at her delicate coffee cup, “This is very pretty china.” “One of our families gave them to us. Aren’t they wonderful? I think these pieces are from England. I don’t know the name. Are you a collector?” “I’m interested in fine china, but never had the money to collect any.” She took the cup off the saucer and glanced at him, “May I?” He nodded and she turned it over and read, “Royal Albert Old Country Roses, Royal Doulton China. It is very beautiful.” The priest held up the cup and saucer to study it, “It really is. Father Christoff over at the Greek Orthodox Church has a few pieces of Russian Imperial Porcelain China. It is extremely delicate.” “Lomosov from St. Petersburg?” Autumn’s eyes sprung open, “I saw that once. I just fell in love with it!” “Someday, I’ll call Christoff and invite us over there for coffee. I will tell him we want to use the Imperial Porcelain!” “You can’t do that.” “Yes, I can,” Landers chuckled, “He and I are good friends. He won’t mind.” “Is he a clanner?” “Sort of. Of course, you’d know about the clan since most of the Jessups are clanners, but there are several folks who are good friends of the clan. Christoff doesn’t come every Sunday and so on, like the rest of us. He has a family and is very busy since he is the only priest for his congregation.” “A Father that has a family?” Autumn stammered. “I didn’t know..”

“Greek Orthodox priests can be married.” “I didn’t know that. I don’t know much about any churches but my own.” “Most folks don’t. In fact, many clergymen don’t. I find it fascinating. Did you know that they all say we need to be good to each other?” Then he grinned, “Of course, that’s the hardest part, right?” “Yes,” Autumn was beginning to relax. She really felt comfortable with this man. “I like it when everybody else has to be nice to me. I like it a lot less when I have to be nice to everyone else.” Landers laughed, “Amen, Sister!” “Now you sound like you go to my church!” Autumn giggled, revealing her wonderful smile. “Christoff is going to be at the cookout, so we can ask him about our coffee party. How does that sound?” “I think I’d enjoy that. Thank you.” Autumn took a bit of the brownie, “I am going to work with Clarence to practice on our mud pies today.” “Now, I really need to know, do you use sand or clay?” “Flour is good.” “That’s a relief!” Then Landers became serious again and refilled her cup, “So, what happened that rattled your faith?” She dropped her eyes, “I don’t know if I lost my faith in God or in myself.” He raised his eyebrows and suggested, “Maybe a bit of both?” She shrugged slightly, “I guess that is so.” They sat quietly for a bit and then Landers said, “Do you have a place you want to start, or not? I definitely feel that talking to me was Joey’s idea, not yours.” “You’re right. I’m in the process of cracking up, you know.”

He chuckled, “No, I didn’t. Is that something you are looking forward to or trying to avoid?” She looked at him in shock, “I’m not even sure.” “Why don’t we discuss that and see?” he smiled warmly.

17-

Landers watched her for a time in silence and then commented, “You’re hard core. I have met some really tough guys that couldn’t keep it bottled up so well.” “Maybe it is because I’m not as nice as you think I am.” He grinned, “Kiddo, nobody is as nice as we think. So, what is it? All I have gleaned is that you are Christian, Brad was Christian, and you were going to marry but he died. Did I miss something?” “No, I guess I might as well tell you or Joey will be mad because he had to help move bushes.” Autumn mumbled to herself. “I didn’t want to tell anyone anything. I came up here because I was going crazy back home. I couldn’t sleep so Mother took me to the doctor. He gave me some sleeping pills and some tranquilizers, but told me I had to see a counselor to get any more. He thought a couple months would get me past my mourning stage.” “Did it?” “Well, I never went to a counselor. I decided to come up here. I didn’t even look for a job down there, or even care enough to look. Mother must have talked to Auntie Alma and then they came up with this plan to have me help with Uncle George. I knew, and they knew, that he was doing better and didn’t need help. They did it for me, not me for them; but it gave me an excuse to leave there. I think I made a mistake, though.” “Why?” “I forgot that Joey and I have always been close, and he is so meddlesome. When we were kids, he was always the one who ratted me out. He says it’s because he has to worry about me, but he could just leave me be.” “What kind of ratting does he do? Is it to get you in trouble or do you think he really is trying to help?”

“Depends on how I feel at the time,” she answered honestly. “I mean I was doing just dandy. Everyone thought I was down because of Brad dying a couple days before our wedding. That was okay. No questions or anything. Was that enough for Joey? No, of course not! He wasn’t happy until he peeled off the veneer!” Landers raised his eyebrows, “You are actually quite upset that he did that. Did he just do it out of the clear blue to upset you?” She sighed, “No. He just listened to me and that’s how he got all twisted out of shape.” “What twisted him?” “See, I made the comment that I ran out of the emergency room of my new job the day Brad died and never went back. Later, when I was talking to Auntie Alma, he heard me say that I would never forget the policeman coming to friends door to tell us about Brad’s accident.” Landers nodded, “I can see his confusion. Which was it?” “Both.” Autumn leaned back in the chair as she babbled off on a tangent, “You know, that probably wouldn’t have bothered him if Sammy hadn’t fell. I didn’t wake up when he fell right outside my bedroom door. So, Joey worried because he knew I was upset that day and I had told him about my pills. Then he comes tromping in my room and shakes me awake because he thought I tried to kill myself! He was determined to call Dr. Samuels.” “Had you?” “Had I what?” “Overdosed?” “Well, yes, a little, but I wasn’t trying to kill myself. I just wanted to sleep.” “How many pills worth did you want to sleep?” Landers raised one eyebrow. “Three tranquilizers and two sleeping pills.” “What were you supposed to take?”

“One sleeping pill.” “Autumn, if he had taken that many pills, what would you have done?” She bit her lip as she studied the priest’s face, “I know. The same thing.” “Are you angry at Joey because he had your number or simply because you didn’t get away with it?” “I honestly wasn’t trying to kill myself. I just didn’t care if it happened, you know?” “Someone said you are a ed nurse?” “Yes. Don’t even go there. Anyway, so he drags me into to see this Dr. Samuels. You know what? Now he doles out the tranquilizers like I’m an addict!” “I doubt he thinks you’re an addict. He might think you are untrustworthy in the pill department.” She frowned, “I’d almost rather be an addict.” “No. Trust me, you wouldn’t,” he shook his head. “The worst part about that is that the high you feel the first time you use is the best it will ever get. They’ve all told me that. After that, it is all downhill.” “That would be a drag.” Landers leaned ahead, “So, I have a question. If you spoke with Samuels and are getting thing sorted out, why are you talking to me?” “Well, when I told him I was upset with my faith, he suggested that I talk to my pastor. I said I would, but I really wouldn’t because Byron is my cousin’s husband. So, I won’t. Anyway, then Sammy found out that I didn’t tell Samuels everything and said I had to tell Joey who had a fit. He told me to tell him the whole thing or–” “Or what?” “I don’t know,” she half-grinned, “He never said, but I knew it wouldn’t be

good. He said I could talk to one of you guys and I said I wouldn’t talk to a Catholic and he just laughed. He made me pick. When he said that you had worked with criminals, I figured you’d be my best bet. So, here I am.” “I don’t know how to take that!” He scrunched his face, “Now, to compile what I know, I know that you are a criminal who takes too many pills accidentally. It does sound like its right up my alley.” He appraised her, “Are we talking armed robbery?” “No, nothing that minor. I might as well just tell you.” “That would be best.” She spent the next few minutes telling Father Landers the tortured story, right down to her advising Jake to coerce Brad over for his beating and then Brad ending up dead at the bottom of a ravine in a pile of wreckage. She even went into her tirade over Brad’s glorious funeral. When she was finished, she added, “After I finally told Joey the whole thing, he said he thought he was only going to have to pat my back and give me the old ‘in time, you’ll find a new love’ speech. Now he is stuck with my problems and maybe legal ones besides. I imagine when the police find out what I did, I’ll end up in the slammer.” Landers laughed, “Mighty doubtful. I’ll put a call in to Wolf and ask him for his advice on a hypothetical case. We can find out what legal consequences you might be facing.” “I don’t want you to tell him. Then he’ll know and I’ll owe him money, too!” “He won’t charge me and I actually call him every so often. Not too worry,” Landers smiled, “I’ll call him right now and see if he is available.” He made the phone call and was fortunate because Wolf was between clients. He gave him a hypothetical description of the bare events and asked the legal liabilities. Wolf answered. They talked about the cookout and said their goodbyes. When the priest sat down, Autumn was just staring at him in amazement. He looked at her and asked, “What?” “Does everyone in this state belong to the clan and know about the cookout?” “No. I heard there is a lady in Grand Forks who doesn’t!” Landers laughed,

“Actually, Wolf is another outer circle clanner. He does most of the legal work for the clan, in fact. Good man, good attorney, and all around nice fellow. He has been drafted as the arbitrator for the cookout because there was more than a little sleight of hand with the last cookout. Some entries were eaten before they could be judged and the place was overwhelmed with bribery.” Autumn wagged her head, “This place is just nutty.” “Yes,” Landers beamed as if given a great compliment. “It is at that. Do you want to hear what he said?” She nodded. Father Landers explained, “Wolf feels you would have no legal worries. You did not tell Jake to kill Brad or even beat him. You said that Brad wouldn’t go there if he was threatened, which was factual. The police knew that Brad had gone to see Jake, so they likely talked to him already. You didn’t see him force Brad off the road, nor do you know for a fact that Jake even did. You aren’t required to report your suspicions. You weren’t questioned by the police. Unless there is something that you aren’t telling me, you’re in the clear with the law.” A few tears slipped out of her eyes and she visibly relaxed. “I’ve been so frightened. I really never intended for him to be hurt, you know?” “I don’t believe that and neither do you,” Landers said frankly. “Having said that there are no legal ramifications doesn’t mean there are no moral ones. You have amassed a tremendous amount of guilt. Samuels will be great helping you with some of it, but Joey is right. Some of it is in my department. Let’s look at your relationship to God in this scenario.” “I think I’m fine now. I’ve taken up enough of your time. Thank you,” she smiled as she started to get out of her chair. Landers stood and pressed her shoulder down, “Not so fast.” He walked over to the window and looked out into the backyard, “They aren’t done yet, so neither are we.” He sat down again, “I want you to go back to what you originally said about losing faith in God and yourself. Can you tell me how you lost faith in God?” “I guess because I believed that Brad and I had based our relationship on a great foundation. I guess, a little like we were talking about earlier. Then I found out

he was very duplicitous and deceptive. Everything was based on a lie.” “Who let you down? God or Brad?” “Well, Brad of course.” “Then why did you lose faith in God? How did He let you down?” “He—well, never stopped it from being so awful or stopped me acting so awful. He is supposed to lead me through the valley of the shadow of death and all that. He is supposed to keep my faith strong. Isn’t that the deal?” Landers chuckled, “No. That’s not the deal. He doesn’t stop people from being awful. That is people’s job. He gave us free will. Now we can debate about if that was a good idea or not, considering whom He is dealing with, but that is what He did. It seems that He put it in your mind how to behave. You told me that you had a feeling that you shouldn’t tell Jake how to lure Brad there, but you said you consciously did it anyway.” Autumn stared at her china cup and nearly cried, “Yes. I did.” “I suppose He could have thrown a tantrum and stomped His feet to make you listen. Honestly, between you and me, I don’t think that would have stopped you. Would it?” She giggled nervously, “No, probably not.” “Can you tell me what you wanted to have happen? What was your goal in all this?” She shrugged, “I don’t know. I just wanted him to hurt, to feel bad, and to suffer. I wanted everyone to know what all the lives he had destroyed. I didn’t want him to die.” “You made this decision after talking to him and finding out his side?” “No. I didn’t care about his side of things. That girl was dead, the baby was aborted, Jake was suffering, and I was miserable. That was all I needed to know.”

“Bear with me a minute. What if Brad had gone over to Jake’s and they got into a fistfight? When he came home all black and blue, would you have talked to him then? What would you have said?” “I’d have felt better. I would have told him he got what he deserved, broken off our engagement, and now he would be known for the scum he really was.” “How would everyone know what a scum he was?” “I’d tell them.” Landers watched her a minute, “Do you really believe that?” “No. I don’t like talking to you. You are making me think.” She started to cry, “Nah, I wouldn’t have told anyone and he certainly wouldn’t have. I didn’t need to ask him if the affair was her idea. He called her Sugar Bear. He wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t sweet on her. I know that. He was a cad. I just wanted everyone to know he wasn’t this hero. I knew he wasn’t.” “You mentioned that quite often. Was it he who said he was a hero or everyone else?” “His family mostly, but most folks in our little town thought he was the golden boy and he reveled in it. He was the valedictorian, football hero, and Eagle scout. I was always the lucky one who he paid attention to.” “I think you resented that,” Landers raised one eyebrow and pinched his fingers together a tad, “Just a little, huh?” “No. I was lucky. I was going with Brad Vander Vorst. He was the best catch in the city!” She straightened her posture as she repeated the familiar mantra. Then she hesitated, frowned, and broke into tears, “I hated it. I hated it so much. Everyone always said, ‘you are so lucky.’ I heard that all the time. No one ever said he was so lucky. It made me sick!” “I think you wanted revenge.” Father Landers pointed out matter-of-factly. “The Bible tells us that revenge is God’s business, not ours. We aren’t privy to all that it takes to make those decisions and besides, few of us want to be judged by other mortals.”

“Is that why God won’t forgive me for?” “Who said God won’t forgive you?” “No one. Joey said He would, but I just don’t think He will. I mean, Brad is dead. Law aside, I know, and you know, I had a direct hand in what happened. Even if he just got punched and then ed out when he was driving home. I mean..” “Boy, you made a lot of conclusions in that line of lingo. First off, you have no real idea why Brad drove off the road. At all. You don’t know whether he and Jake even met up, much less had a fight.” “Should I try to get in touch with Jake and ask him?” “What would that achieve?” “Well, then I would know.” “Let’s think about that. Do you know Jake? How he is dealing with this? Would he tell you the truth about any of it? Would you believe him? Does he even know you’re the one he talked to that day? How would he deal with having it all brought up again? And to what end? If you think it’d be worthwhile, by all means. If not, maybe it’s just stirring the pot. Think about it.” She shrugged. The priest said, “It is ultimately your choice. Do you want to perpetuate the spiral or stop it? You need to think long and hard about what outcome you want. Then you need to be prepared to live with your decision and not blame anyone else. I think you might want to work that out with Dr. Samuels. In Alcoholics Anonymous, they recommend making amends where it will cause no more harm. Otherwise, you’re just spreading the pain.” “I really don’t know that I want to spread any more pain. I’d like to have some people understand how I feel without telling them what I did.” “You want the sympathy and not the criticism? Is that likely to happen?” She glared at him and he smiled, “Exactly. Just what I thought.” “Alright, so what are you good for?” she snarled. “You won’t tell me what to do

or how to get out of this. You aren’t much help.” “I can’t do that because it’s for you to do. I can help you with a few things; help weigh the options and ask questions for you to consider. One thing I can tell you, here and now, beyond a doubt, is that God will forgive you. Not because you deserve it for past good deeds or future promises, but because that’s God’s grace. Period. All you need to do is decide what you are sorry for and if you really are…” “Well, of course I am.” He chuckled warmly, “Are you? Or are you sorry that you feel so badly about it, can’t sleep, and in the end, he is still a hero and you were lucky you knew him.” “You don’t mess around, do you?” “It wouldn’t serve either of us well.” “What do you think?” “I think that you need to decide how important it’s to you to have everyone realize how you were betrayed. What will it really matter? You also need to forgive yourself for being a self-centered person, like the rest of humanity. We’re all that way, in varying degrees. Many of us are very magnanimous and forgiving if it really doesn’t matter or when it’s someone else’s issue. But when it comes to ourselves, it is a very different case. That is much tougher to swallow and most folks manage to avoid thinking of it as long as possible.” “I don’t think you like me very well. You must think I’m a real piece of work.” “Actually,” he smiled, “I do like you. I think you’re a neat lady who just ran up against a major dose of betrayal and loss all at once. Before you had time to think, you tried to rectify the situation, but got in deeper. Now you need to decide which side of the hole you want to latch your grappling hook on to get back to life. You need to make that decision yourself. You can either let it go, as is. Or you can decide what you want, get in there, and scratch around to find that outcome, or you just take all those pills and be done with it. Of course, that last option that has no do-over, so I really don’t think that is a good one. It not only hurts those who love you and you have no way to undo it. I can help you think about the rest, but you have to make the choices. I can help you pray for God’s

direction and forgiveness. That is when you decide if you want to be forgiven or just want aid in finishing your project.” “You don’t make that sound very nice.” “If I told you that the garden is all sweet roses, I’d be lying. You’re right. I did work with criminals and tough guys. I can give you a clue; a good share of them have issues not unlike yours. It all really boils down to the nasty fact that we want to be in the front of the line for the ice cream, but in the back of the line for the root canals.” “I hope you won’t be offended if I tell you that you give me a headache.” Landers chuckled, “Autumn, I’m very sorry. I think you are a nice person who didn’t have the time to carefully process everything before you reacted. God loves you and He forgives you. Also, you need to know that He really understands how confused you feel. He is here to help you.” “He wasn’t there before.” “Wasn’t He? Maybe you just weren’t looking for Him, or didn’t want to hear what He was saying. Don’t you that strong feeling that came over you that you shouldn’t tell Jake how to lure Brad over there? The one that you ignored? Where did that feeling come from?” Landers asked, “He was there, through all of it. He was there when your Alma invited you up here, when Joey made you do all this, and I believe, He is here today.” “I see what you are getting at. Maybe I wasn’t being fair.” “You think this over, then give me a call if and when you decide where you stand on this. Or if you just want to visit. Would it be okay with you if I say a prayer and then we can talk about these brownies?” She giggled, “Even though you give me a headache, you’re a nice person.” “I think you are, too, and I think we can be great friends, at least until after we get our coffee party with Christoff. I wonder if he will serve dessert?” After a moving prayer that did make Autumn feel better, he said, “Any time you want to talk, just let me know. We have twenty-four hour phone service here at

the rectory.” “Thanks. I need to think about some of this.” “Yes and if you hit a wall, I’d be glad to help you talk it out. Okay?” They left the study and took their plates to the kitchen. There they found Sister Abigail looking out the window, mesmerized by the carrying-on in the backyard. “In all the time I spent at the logging camp, I’ve never seen such contortions to remove two little bushes! It makes me want to cry!”

18-

Joey and Autumn drove over to Schroeder’s place to George and Alma. Autumn felt good after her talk with Father Landers, though he hadn’t coddled her. She felt that he was giving her some things that seriously needed to be considered. Joey, bless his heart, did not badger her about their meeting and only asked how it went. She nodded and smiled, to which he grinned, “I think Landers is a cool dude. Good. I’m glad it worked out.” “How was your morning?” “Vicaro and Slick go at each other more than Sam and I do!” Joey grinned, “No wonder Sister wears that veil on her head. I bet she’s pulled all her hair out!” Autumn laughed, “When we came out of the study, she was watching the project from her kitchen window. She said she was going to cry.” “I was there and I wanted to cry! Vicaro must have changed his mind about fifty times. At the end, he even made the suggestion that we should replant one of the bushes because it looked naked without it.” Joey shook his head, “Slick said something I didn’t think that priests could say! No wonder they have those confessional thingies!” Autumn laughed, “The whole bunch is more real than I ever imagined they.” “Have you met Vicaro’s best friend yet? Kincaid, the retired FBI agent? Good night, those two are something else separately, but together they will make your hair stand on end!” “Are they all from around here?” “No, I don’t think so. Sister Abigail is originally from northwestern Montana, Slick is from Vermont and I don’t know about the other two. I know that Landers was recently in California, but I never heard where he was from. I think Vicaro is from another planet all together.”

“They seem like fun folks though.” “Yes, but they know their business.” Autumn nodded, “Landers sure doesn’t mess around with the forgiveness stuff, I can tell you that. He said God would forgive me, but that I had to decide if I really wanted to be forgiven or if I just wanted to feel better. That had never crossed my mind before.” “That really puts the berries in the pie, doesn’t it?” Joey shook his head. “I guess maybe all his years at the rehab place and as a military chaplain kinda makes him be more to the point about stuff.” “I think it’s good, don’t you?” “Yes, I do.” Joey agreed. “You know, I had some sweet religious lady tell me once that Jesus never got angry. I wondered if she had ever read that part where He threw the moneychangers out of the temple? I never imagined He was singing You are My Sunshine when He did that!” Autumn looked over to her cousin with concern “You aren’t normal.”

When they got inside the big Schroeder farmhouse, Autumn could barely conceal her shock. From the outside, the house looked big, but inside it was enormous. While Auntie Alma’s kitchen was large, this one was even larger and yet had a homey feeling. She was greeted by Nora Schroeder, a gracious, slender lady in her fifties. She had auburn hair and big brown eyes. Nora welcomed her and then introduced her to tiny Grandma Engelmann. The little lady was about four-foot eleven and maybe ninety pounds dripping wet. She had a pile of white hair. Her bright blue eyes devilishly glinted behind her bifocals. She gave her a hug and beamed, “You are the girl that our little Clarence has been raving about! He thinks you are the cat’s paws!” “I think he is a very nice fellow, too.” Autumn smiled back. “Is he here?” “He is outside but will be in soon. I’d like you to meet some of the others. This

is Kathleen Finch.” Grandma motioned to a blonde girl in her late twenties. “Hello,” Autumn said shyly, noticing that the pretty girl was walking with a walker while sporting a cast on her leg and a nasty scar on her forehead. “You seem familiar, did I meet you before?” “No, I don’t think so. I know— you were at St. Johns just now. Sister Abigail is my aunt.” Kathleen said, “Folks say we look alike.” “Yes! That must be it,” Autumn beamed. “Are you from western Montana, too?” “Yes. This is my home now, with Elton and Nora. I am engaged to Jeff Wilson, who lives across the road at the Petunia Patch.” Autumn frowned, “I thought that was Kincaid’s place.” “It is. Jeff lives there, too.” Joey stepped in, “Don’t try to understand it all, Leaves. It will eventually sink in… just a couple minutes before it all changes.” Autumn shook her head, “I don’t get it.” Kathleen laughed, “Here I thought it was because a car landed on my head! Guess it just the nature of the beast!” “A car landed on your head?” “Well, not just my head, more like my whole body. I found out that when your car comes off an over, you really don’t fare very well.” “How long ago did that happen?” “In April. Anyway, I can get around with the walker, but still can’t dance.” “Were you a dancer?” Kathleen giggled, “No, but don’t let Jeff know. I want him to think I was a dancing machine and this is my excuse so I don’t have to show him the goods.” While they were talking, a little girl about four-years old came up and stood by Kathleen. Kathleen patted her head while she was talking and then introduced her to Autumn. “Kitten, this lady is Autumn. She lives at Jessup’s house.”

The little Indian girl with a pixie hair-do smiled shyly and shook her hand, “Are you the Leaf Girl that is Clarence’s partner?” “Yes, Joey calls me Leaves.” “Are you really going to make mud pies?” “They are called mud pies, but are really chocolate and whipped cream.” “Oh good,” the little girl sighed with relief, “I was worried. I didn’t think they’d taste good. Rocks make me burp.” Autumn stifled her giggled, “I promise, ours will have no rocks in it!” “I better tell Mr. Kid, so he doesn’t have to worry.” Kitten asked, “Do you know him? He is my best buddy.” “I think I met him at dinner at our house one day.” “I’ll show him to you when he comes to eat. Then you can .” “Thank you,” Autumn smiled, “Did you say your name was Kitten?” “No, Miss Kathleen said it, but it is. That noisy boy is my brother, Clancy. We call him Pockets because Clancy is too hard to say. Is that why they call you Leaf Girl?” “Might be. Do you think Autumn is hard to say?” The tiny girl shrugged, “It’s okay, but I might just say Miss Leaf Girl.” “That’ll be fine.”

Joey and Uncle George went outside to go visit Andy and Jackson who also lived at Schroeders and worked at the appliance repair shop, which sat on the farmyard just south of the house. The ladies enjoyed a cup of coffee while Nora’s rolls baked in the oven and Kathleen’s Navy bean soup simmered on the stove. It smelled wonderful.

They visited about making the pies and decided that today they would just do the crusts. Most of the Schroeder family would be gone after lunch and then they could start. Grandma said they had a pile of pie tins in the pantry they could use, since they would need about twenty pies. Autumn almost ed out, “Twenty pies? That many? I was thinking two.” Nora laughed, “You need to have enough so everyone can have a taste and then vote. So, I think you will want enough pieces to get the votes!” “Hmm, more pies-more votes.” Alma giggled. “Think we can round up a hundred pie tins?” “Real funny,” Autumn made a face. “I think twenty will be just fine. We can make the crusts ahead, but the pie filling gets sort of skinky when it’s frozen.” Grandma Katherine gasped. “If it is anything I hate, it’s skinky pie.” “I mean it separates and looks funny. I think Clarence and I’ll have to do that the day before. It can sit in the fridge overnight nicely.” “We have plenty of room in our fridge downstairs. I will just move things around.” Alma said, “If we can borrow the pie tins.” “Of course,” Nora nodded, “I’ll bring them up right after lunch. So, you won’t need Clarence until Friday?” “Actually, he can help me make the bottom layers of caramel and fudge over the cracker crust and then the pudding goes over that. We will have to do the whipped cream right before we serve it. When is it? Saturday afternoon? So, Saturday morning.” Autumn shrugged, “Maybe we should just do apple pie or something that isn’t so fussy.” “No,” Grandma Katherine stated, “Already have apple pie in the contest and besides, no one will do any work more than necessary the day before the cookout. This whole tribe goes slightly off the rails.” Autumn couldn’t help it and raised her eyebrows. Grandma nodded, “I mean, slightly more than usual.”

It was decided that Jessups would pick up Clarence at Darrell’s after morning chores and they could work on them until chore time one of the weekdays. Since Sammy and Joey would be sleeping or at work most of the day, they should be undisturbed with their project. Lunch was fun. Autumn met most of the folks who lived there and some who were visiting. She really wondered if anyone truly had any idea of who lived where, but one of Clarence’s little sisters, Clarissa, who had just turned six, explained it. “See, Miss Leaves, if they have a bed here, they live here, unless they don’t, like Crandall who does butcept when he is somewhere else. Got it?” Autumn numbly nodded, “Yes, Clarissa, I think I do.” “If you need any more help about who is sisters or tiyospaye, just ask me. I am a good explainer. See I explained all about it to Miss Diane and she teached me about curtsying. Do you know how to curtsy?” “Yes.” “Good, because me and Maddie Lynn do it a lot, but me more than her…for when we meet the God Bless Our Queen. Iris Suzanne who lives by the next yard over, used to have her bed at my house, until her daddy got a bed for her at her house. Now we are just neighbors.” “Oh.” “We really wanted the boys to be our Changing Guard like the Queen, but they won’t do it. Do you think you could make them?” Clarissa asked. “Not likely, Clarissa. I’m sorry.” Elton Schroeder, who was in his mid-sixties, rescued her from Clarissa, “Clarissa, I think that maybe Autumn would like to think about all this for a while.’ Clarissa looked at Autumn with a knowing expression, “Miss Leaves. That means in Mister talk for me to put a sock in it. I have to be quiet now because I want to go to Maddie Lynn’s so we can practice our Tea Cakes for the cookout. Ginger and Iris Suzanne think they are going to win us, but they aren’t.”

“You mean beat you,” Kathleen corrected her. Clarissa opened her eyes into huge circles, “No, Miss Kathleen. Missus said no hitting. If we want to hit somebody, we have to talk to her about it first. I don’t think she will say yes. Did your Mommy let you hit people?” “No, she didn’t,” Autumn gulped, and thought to herself. “I bet you think I’m a naughty girl. I don’ want to be.” “That’s okay, Clarissa,” Autumn smiled, “I had brothers when I was a girl, so I know how it is.” “Were you a girl once? I didn’t know they had girls back then.” The little girl was distracted by a knock on the door, “Oh, look. Baby Holly is here!” She ran to say hi to Kevin Schroeder, and his wife, Carrie, who was another of Autumn’s cousins. “Do you know her?” Clarissa asked Autumn. “Yes,” Carrie gave Autumn a hug, “She and I have known each other since we were little kids.” “That is a long, long time. I bet you can’t even that long.” “You’re batting a thousand there, little girl.” Kevin teased her, “I haven’t met Autumn, so maybe you could introduce me?” Clarissa stretched his hand out toward Autumn, “This is my new brother, cause about Mister and Missus got forever papers for us Grey Hawks. So say hi.” Autumn shook his hand, “Pleased to meet you. This must be your beautiful little girl, Holly?” “Yes,” he beamed proudly, “Thankfully, she got her looks from Carrie’s side of the family!” “You look like your brother, Keith.” “No. I’m the good looking one,” Kevin laughed. Before lunch was over, Autumn felt like she had met almost every citizen of

North Dakota. Clarence gave her a big hug when he came in from outside and announced that she was sitting next to him because they were partners in the cookout. Then CJ was offended, because he thought she had come to see his rabbits. Autumn soothed his feelings and asked, “Can you show me your rabbits after we eat, okay?” “Okay, if you want me to show them to you. Clarence doesn’t do the rabbits. He can show you his goat babies. Did you know they call them kids?” “I did know that.” At the end of lunch, the phone rang. Elton talked for a bit and then said, “They’re here. Want to talk to one of them?” He handed the phone to Joey, “It’s Jerald. He has a couple trucks of horses and has been trying to get in touch with you.” “Hi, Jerald. How soon will you be at our place? Two hours? Okay, I’ll be home then,” he nodded. When Joey hung up, he said, “Jerald said that he got a tiny Shetland for you, Kid. He thought maybe you would like that for Kitten.” Kitten nodded, “Millie too tall.” Kid chuckled, “Should we exchange Millie for a shorter horse, Kitten?” The little girl nodded, “Okay. Millie too tall.” “I know,” Kid smiled. “How about the surprise we ordered for Landers?” Joey smiled, “He said he did and he also found a horse for Autumn. I didn’t know Landers ordered a horse.” “He doesn’t know yet, either. He always borrows, but we thought he should have his own.” Elton stated, “It will be his birthday present from the clan.” “Oh that is cool, like Slick’s, huh?” Joey chuckled. “Let me put in a few bucks from Old Leaves and me. When is his birthday?”

“In September.” Elton said as he took the cash. Autumn objected, “Gee Joey. I should start paying my own way.” “I know, and you will. My pickup needs cleaning. I’m keeping track of every cent, plus interest. Don’t you worry your pretty little head about that!” Nora smiled, “I’d be worried if I was her— with you keeping my s!” Joey laughed, “Oh Nora, you and I are pretty tight. I think the world of you. I wouldn’t overcharge you! You wouldn’t have to worry.” Clarence interrupted, “Are we having a birthday cake for Father Landers when his birthday is?” “Yes, of course,” Nora explained. “When is it in September? Autumn’s is the fifteenth,” Auntie Alma said. “His is the nineteenth, I believe. Well, then you can celebrate together,” Nora smiled. “We’re going to give him his horse right away though,” Elton explained. “He might as well ride it. Jerald doesn’t always make it out to Oregon and he knew about this herd out there.” “Turned out he found your horse at the same ranch.” Joey nodded, “It isn’t exactly like Traveller, but you’ll have to make do.” “Joey, if it was exactly like Traveller, it would have been dead for some time,” Autumn wagged her head. “Then you wouldn’t have to worry about falling off!” Joey pronounced. Kevin shook his head, “Autumn, you are welcome to come live with Carrie and me. Joey might be contagious.” The toddler known as High Pockets was only a week away from being two and had been listening to the lunch conversation from his high chair. “Pockets Happy Day! Creekow! Horse!”

Autumn asked, “What is Creekow?” “Creekow is what he calls his best buddy, Crandall,” Elton explained. “He will be flying in from the Caymans for the cookout. He has an air charter service and recently became a clanner.” Clarissa nodded, “See, I telled you about it, Miss Leaves. When he gets here, he will live here until he goes again.”

Autumn enjoyed seeing the rabbits with CJ and Kevin. She learned that Kid and Little Charlie were also partners in the rabbit business which now had over a hundred rabbits. After looking at the rabbits, they walked over to the horse corrals. The men were getting organized for the new additions. Elton explained, “We like to keep the new ones separated until they get comfortable in their new surroundings. It works better that way.” “I imagine so. Does everyone here have a horse?” “Most of us do, but some of us don’t ride very often.” Elton leaned on the fence, “When Kitten gets used to her new pony, Kid is planning on starting Clancy on Millie.” “Isn’t he very young?” “Oh, some poor devil will get stuck riding with him at first, but before long he can. Millie is a fantastic horse and very gentle. Great with kids, but like Kitten says- she is tall. The height scared Kitten.” “Is Kid the horse master?” Elton laughed, “I guess he is at that. He is very good with them and teaching new riders. Have you ridden?” “A couple times, once side-saddle,” Autumn explained. “If I had to do that, I’d rather walk.” “I’d guess. The boys will help you. All the Jessup boys are great, and Jeannie, Darrell’s wife, is one of the best riders around. Kid would, too, if you say the

word. We’d all be glad to help if need something or find someone that can.” “Making Joey behave?” Autumn asked. Elton grimaced, “I meant anything that is remotely possible.”

19-

Autumn and Clarence set up their project. The ladies helped them gather what they needed, leaving them at it while they went into the massive dining room to visit. She and Clarence looked at each other, at the stack of pie tins, the ingredients piled on the table, and then back at each other. Neither said a word for a bit. Finally, Autumn said, “Well, I guess it isn’t going to get done all by itself.” Clarence shook his head, “No. I think that I might be mad at your cousins for making you do this and letting me say I’d help!” Autumn burst out laughing, “My feelings exactly, Clarence! I think all we can do now is either give up or show them what we are made of!” “Giving up would be easiest, but then they’d think they were winner guys, huh? I guess we’ll just have to make the best pies ever.” Then he looked at the stack of pie tins and said hopefully, “We should be good at it by the time we are done.” “I imagine so.” Autumn agreed. “Next time, I think we should make soup.” Clarence looked at her a minute, “Or just not play with them.” “That’s an even better idea. We could go to the movies the day they have the cookout.” “Miss Leaves, it takes so long, we would have to see three movies.” “We could go eat in between. What do you think?” “I sure hope they are good movies.” She took a deep breath, “Here goes nothing! We need to grind up some vanilla and chocolate wafers and then some graham crackers.” “How does that make pie crust?”

“See, most of it will be vanilla wafers because they are sandy colored. The chocolate are dark brown and the graham are in between. We will add smaller amounts of the other two to the vanilla and it will make it look like dirt.” Clarence seemed completely unimpressed, “Oh.” “I think we can grind it all up and save the grinds. We can use them to mix each portion for each pie separately. Otherwise, it will likely be mush after we add the melted butter.” “Well, dirt is sort of mushy.” “Yes, it is. Good point. Maybe we can do three pies worth at once. Then it will only be a little mushy. How does that grab you?” The nine-year old giggled, “It grabs me fine!” They used Grandma Engelmann’s hand grinder and finished the grinding in no time. They ended up with the bread dough pan full of ground vanilla wafers and smaller containers full of the others. When they got finished, Clarence grimaced, “I think we did a lot of work to make a big mess!” “I love you, Clarence! I agree with you!” Autumn giggled and gave him a hug. “Do you think we are ready for a coffee break?” “Yes, I can have coffee once in a while because I’m big enough. I have to put cream in it. Mister says that if I’m going to be a North Dakota Lutheran Farmer, I’d better learn to drink coffee!” “Is that what you want to be?” Autumn asked as she poured the coffee. “It’s pretty good to be that.” Clarence nodded as he poured cream in his cup, “You know my real Dad and both of my other Moms lived on the Reservation. I loved them a lot and stuff, but this is better. They weren’t happy very much. Me and the kids are glad that we gave Mister and Missus a chance to be our folks. I was worried that my Dad might not want us to be here, but Mister told me that he was sure that he was. Mister has never said something that wasn’t true, except a little fudge sometimes. So I guess I might as well believe him. I checked later with Mr. Darrell and he said the same thing, so I’m pretty much sure they’re right. What do you think?”

“I am certain they are and that your Dad would be very proud of you.” Then she frowned, “Provided we don’t tell him about today. I don’t know what he would think about this?” Clarence laughed, “Me either. Sioux word for crazy white man stuff is wasicu witko. I don’t think Sioux made this stuff, so they would probably call it that.” “Wasicu witko?” Autumn tried to repeat, “Does that mean idiot?” “Waz-ee’-choo weet-ko’,” Clarence repeated slowly. “It means like foolish white man idea, but it is usually not a nice thing to say. I don’t know if we have a word for dumbbell. Our word means more like you don’t know anything.” Then he giggled, “Like you’re a dumbbell.” They both laughed again and decided that their pies were wasicu witko for certain, and from that point on, no longer called them pies. They were called wasicu witko. Few folks would understand and they didn’t even care. They decided they weren’t going to explain it, either. As he was measuring the sugar into the ground vanilla wafers, he asked, “People always want everybody to understand them? Why is that, Miss Leaves?” “No, I don’t really know. I guess it just makes us feel more comfortable, and then maybe helps us know if we are behaving normally.” “What if the people who understand us aren’t normal? Why would we care? And if they think we are wrong, we’d just get mad at each other anyway.” “Hmm, good point.” “Like our pies, we understand us, cause we are the ones that did it. Other people that aren’t doing it, don’t. As long as we do, we’re cool. Right? I mean, if I tried to explain it to Clarissa, I know she and I would both end up with a headache.” Autumn laughed, “I think you are very correct. Thank you. Did you know that you helped me solve a big problem that has been bothering me? I enjoy working with you. I’m so glad you said you’d be on my team. That was very kind of you to offer to help me.” “I’m glad I did, too. You know, Mister says that we are here to help each other.

Otherwise we are just taking up space.” “He said that huh?” “Yup, he says it a lot. And us Sioux have our Sacred Virtues that we try to keep. One is generosity and that means to share our stuff, our time, and our friendship. Sorta the same thing, don’t you think?” “I do. You are a very wise young man.” Clarence stopped patting the melted butter into the vanilla grinds, “My Dad used to say I didn’t know very much, but Mister says I do. Miss Jeannie taught me how to read and Mr. Matt takes me to the big library in Bismarck. I told him I want to read it all, so I will know stuff.” “Darrell told me that you have read a lot. That is a great thing, but the whole library is a lot of books.” “I know, I’m keeping track. I worried though last time I was there, because the library lady told me they got a hundred and fifty more books. I have only read about a hundred, so I’ll never get finished if they keep buying more!” “That could be a problem, but you may not want to read them all. Some things you might not be interested in.” “I know I would’ve never read about making pies, but now look! Guess I’ll have to read them all because I don’t know what will come up!” Autumn stopped and took out their first pie plate, “Okay. First, we are going to put a tiny bit of butter on a paper towel and spread it around the pie dish. Then we’ll make a couple very thin trails of ground graham cracker across the bottom of the pan. Very, very thin. We are going to add one handful of chocolate wafer grounds into the vanilla and stir it lightly. After that, we press the the grounds into the pie tin so that it makes about a third inch thick pie crust.” “Does it have to have a special design? We could put some of those chopped nuts in there too, to be like rocks, huh?” “Would you like to be in charge of that?”

“I guess.” As the piecrusts were made, Autumn placed them in the hot oven to bake and then removed them to cool. It took them until four-thirty to complete them all and they were tired when they were finished. However, they had a good time and had become great friends. Autumn felt that her visit with Clarence had helped her put some things in her mind at rest. She was anxious to tell Landers about it. She had learned that a person really didn’t need to have everyone else understand them. Joey and Uncle George had gone home to meet Jerald at their place, but Alma stayed behind with her. After the pies were baked, it was getting to be time for them to get home. Nora helped them move the pies to boxes and put them in the trunk of Uncle George’s car. Alma handed Autumn the keys. “Home, James!” When they arrived in the yard, there were two semi-trailers by the corrals. Autumn was surprised and Alma explained, “Since we don’t milk anymore, Jerald asked to use our home pasture for his layover-station. He brings his horses here until they can be sold or delivered. He pays us a boarding fee for them. It gives us a bit of an income and doesn’t require George to have to do anything. The boys can handle it with their jobs.” “When does Joey go back to work?” “I think tomorrow night, but he’ll be off for the cookout. Sammy is working until Wednesday.” Auntie Alma said, “The following week, Sam will be mostly off and Joe will be working. I have to keep it on the calendar because I can’t keep their schedules straight.” “Do they always work nights?” “No, they rotate. Confusing. If they show up for a meal, I feed them. If they don’t, I don’t. There’s a lot less wear and tear that way.” Autumn stopped the car in front of the house and said, “I always wanted everything to be laid out. I’m beginning to see that isn’t always the best way.” “I think if it works, it’s great. There are just too many things that it doesn’t work with. Maybe that is the trick, to know the difference,” Auntie Alma got out of the car. “It looks to me like the guys aren’t going to be able to help, so we better

start carting!” “Clarence and I both decided this is the last time we are doing this!” “You seemed to be giggling a lot.” “We did. I can see why Darrell loves that kid. He’s great.” After several trips to the basement, the ladies had all the pie crusts carried in. Then Alma said, “I’m going to throw the coffee pot on for the men. You run out and invite them all in for a cup.” “Truckers, too?” “Yes, ma’am. They all need a break!” Autumn ran out to the corrals and Uncle George motioned for her to come over to where he was supervising, “Came to see your horse?” “No, Auntie Alma said to invite everyone in for coffee. I actually had forgotten about my horse. How many did Jerald bring, anyway?” “I brought twenty,” Jerald beamed as he offered his hand to Autumn. “You must be the proud Southern gal who is the owner of General Lee’s Traveller?” She giggled, “I guess and you must be the famous horse buyer everyone raves about.” “Wow, I like you already!” The middle-aged, short fellow grinned, “Your pony is over there. Joey put it in the side corral with Kitten’s Shetland and Landers horse.” “I thought they were going to be at Schroeders,” Autumn looked around the bustling corral. “They will be, but they were mixed up in the semi. Some are saddle broken but some have never been ridden and are brood stock. We decided to unload them here and then Kid will take those two home with him.” “Oh, I see Kid is here. I hadn’t noticed him before.”

“He might want some for his stock. We are sorting them now.” Her face revealed that she didn’t understand, so he gave a more detailed . “See, he is building a herd and needs some what we call brood mares. They can be bred and have good, strong foals. They don’t have to be ridden, but Kid would prefer that all his stock was broken to ride. It is easier that way and usually makes the mares easier to handle. There are a few good riding horses in this lot. The three I got for the clanners and then two others. Others have never seen a saddle. I think most of them will go to a man in Michigan. He will be here in two weeks to take them. They are all healthy sturdy stock,” Jerald nodded to Uncle George, “I picked up the saddle for Kitten, Landers, and your niece.” “I must owe you a ton,” Autumn mumbled. “You don’t owe me a penny. Now, you might owe Joey, but I’m good,” Jerald laughed. After the men finished sorting the horses, they went in for coffee. Autumn was learning that Alma’s idea of coffee generally consisted of sandwiches, chips, bars, and coffee. More like a mini-meal. After the truckers left, Joey said, “Come on, Old Leaves, don’t you want to see your pony?” Kid smiled, “That Traveller is a beauty. I think you’ll like her.” “I thought General Lee’s horse was a male.” “Close enough,” Joey chuckled. “Kid said he’ll teach you the finer points of riding when you get ready. I told him I had you riding bareback the other day.” “You were with me, Joey! That’s not quite the same!” “Not to worry,” Kid smiled. “I’ll be over to help you on Monday. You’ll want to be ready to ride within a couple weeks, because we are having that camp out.” “Camp out?” “Yes, some of Nora and Elton’s friends from the Grand Caymans will be here and their kids want to go camping on the prairies like the cowboys did. They

wanted Indians there, too, but we’ll have to settle for mostly little ones. Our grown up Indian friends might not be able to make it because of their jobs,” Kid grinned. “We could fix up Old Leaves with some war paint,” Joey guffawed. That earned him a whack from Autumn, and he crossed his eyes, “For a southern belle, she’s a mean one!” Autumn’s Traveller was a tall horse, gray with black points. It was a beautiful horse, but was used to being called Cochise. Kid suggested that she call the horse Cochise Traveller for a while and then just drop the Cochise. “Lander’s horse is named Walla Walla,” Kid frowned, “I don’t think that it looks like a Walla Walla.” “That makes me think of an onion,” Autumn giggled. “Not a good name for a priest’s horse.” “Do you know Landers?” Kid asked. “He is one of my dearest friends. That guy got me through detox and put up with more from me than I deserved. I have nothing but good to say about him. I would be nowhere without him. He really came to my rescue.” “I know,” Autumn nodded, “I have talked to him about my issues of guilt and mourning. He is helping me redeem myself.” “You know, he’d be the first to say, that we both would have made it without him, but I know it would have taken me a lot longer.” Kid patted the dark sorrel’s neck, “I would like to repay him.” “What you just said gave me an idea,” Autumn said. “Tell me if you think it is out there, okay?” “Sure.” “What you said reminded me that some of the meanings of redemption are rescue, recovery, repayment, and restoration. That reminds me of his work with us and that drug rehabilitation place. Add to that he is a priest, how about naming his horse Redemption?”

Kid cocked his head to one side and thought, “Not the usual name for a horse, but you know, I really like it. Let’s ask Joey.” “He’ll hate it!” Autumn gasped. Joey came over, “Did I hear hate and Joey in the same sentence?” “No,” Autumn pursed her lips, “Two different sentences!” “We want your opinion on the name of this horse for Landers. Its name now is Walla Walla.” Joey made a face and wrinkled his nose, “Don’t much care for that.” “We were thinking Redemption.” Joey stepped back and looked at the tall sorrel with its black mane and tail. It had only a little white on his nose almost like a thumbprint and two white socks. It was a majestic steed. He began to nod slowly, “I think it is a fitting name. In fact, I like it.” Kid and Autumn shook hands, “Then we’ll call him Redemption.” Autumn asked Kid, “Do I have to call him Walla Walla Redemption for while? That’s pretty long to say.” “Only for a few days,” Kid grinned, “Hopefully he’ll be smart enough to figure it out soon. Are you keeping him here then?” “Oh, I forgot, he is going over to Schroeders.” Joey made a suggestion, “You know, maybe we should offer to keep him here, free boarding. We don’t have that many here on a regular basis and besides, he could ride with Leaves when none of us are around. Unless of course, he wants it somewhere else. I know that everyone wants to be present tomorrow when we give the horse to him but then we can bring him back over here.” “Makes no difference,” Kid said. “It’d be nice for you to have a riding partner, since these guys are gone so much, or sleeping.”

“Maybe he doesn’t want to ride with me.” “Then he can go out to the end of the pasture with you and come back alone!” Joey growled, “Yea gads, Leaves. You do have yourself a time.” “If he doesn’t want to ride with you, he has rocks in his head,” Kid winked. “You don’t even know how I ride.” “Good point. Maybe we should give you a few pointers with Traveller.”

20-

That evening, it was quiet at Jessup’s place. Alma and Joey fried some walleye pike while Uncle George and Autumn made a vegetable salad for dinner. Joey and Autumn did the dishes while the older folks watched television. After dishes were finished, Joey asked if Autumn wanted to go check out the horses and she said yes. They walked over to the corral where Redemption and Traveller were. Joey’s Cheetah was out in the pasture with the other horses. “Could you teach me how to whistle for the horses?” Autumn asked. “I might need to feed them while you boys are at work someday.” “Sure,” Joey smiled, obviously very pleased. “That’s the first time you acted like you might want to do something since you got here.” “I guess I was really getting into the role of the miserable martyr, huh?” Autumn shrugged, “Father Landers told me I needed to decide what outcome I wanted. You know, until today, I don’t think I had any idea. I only knew I wanted things to be different.” “I know that feeling. I’m glad that Landers helped you.” “He gets right down to it.” She patted Traveller’s head. “I didn’t know that Kid was an alcoholic. I was surprised when he told me today.” “He said he was an alcoholic?” Joey questioned, “I knew he was an addict, but not an alcoholic.” “Oh, I jumped to that conclusion. He said Landers saw him through detox.” “Yes, he did, for drugs. I know he doesn’t drink either, because it weakens his resolve to not use heroin. Kid is a hell of a guy and has lived a very precarious life. Since he returned to North Dakota, he has made a major turnaround. He was messed up from the war, and turned to drugs. That led him to a biker gang and a prison sentence. I can tell you only because he told you some himself. We don’t

like to broadcast personal things that folks are best off telling themselves. At any rate, he is rebuilding his life. He has started an auto-body shop on his place. In fact, Brett’s Rain is his hired hand.” “I pictured her to be a gorgeous and very feminine teenager.” “She is that. Very gorgeous and she’s nineteen, but she’s a complete tomboy. That’s why it’s killing her to be housebound while she recuperates from being caught under the landslide!” “This place is nothing like I had imagined it. I thought it was sparsely populated and totally flat. There’d never be anything like a landslide, or so many people from all over. Good night! I think I must have met a hundred people so far! They come out of the woodwork!” Joey chuckled, “Wait until Sunday dinner tomorrow after church. We all go to Schroeders for the clan dinner. That whole big dining room will be full!” “Oh no! Joey, I don’t want to. I’ll just panic.” “Nope, you gotta come. Clarence is so looking forward to it and besides, you know most everyone already.” “I might recognize them, but I don’t know them.” Joey shrugged, “I guess Clarence will get over it and you’ll miss out on Lander’s surprise, but that’s up to you. You’ll have to stay home alone because I don’t want to miss it.” “I thought that Landers was coming over here to get his horse.” “Ah! I got your number lady. You want dessert, but don’t want to eat your vegetables!” Autumn spun around, “What did you say?” Joey was surprised, “Why?” “Father Landers said something like that today. Do I really act like that?”

“Sometimes, but hey! Who doesn’t want all the goodies?” “I guess, but I’m beginning to realize that I am a lot more like that than I ever imagined. So, are you going to teach me to whistle?” “Yes, but then we have to feed them oats, you know. There are a lot of them now. I suggest we bring the oats out first and put it in the troughs or we might be overrun.” “Do all horses know to come when they are whistled at?” “No, but most will follow Evinrude and the others.” Joey and Autumn carried several pails of grain to the troughs, spreading only some in each. “Why don’t you just dump it all in one?” “Because then one horse will hog it all and he will get a belly ache, while the others won’t get any.” After washing her hands at the water pump, while Joey crossed his eyes and mocked her for being anal, she was ready for her whistling lesson. It began feebly, but by the time the horses were all eating, she had it down. In fact, she was doing it loudly and well. “I think you can knock it off now, Leaves. I’ll be deaf for several days!.” “You just thought I couldn’t do it.” “Your first whistle reminded me of a squeaky bed spring in a whore house!” “Joseph Albert Jessup, how would you know how that sounds?” He laughed, “Even Ma hasn’t called my by all my names in a long time!” “She would if she heard you say that.” “My poor Old Leaves, you do have yourself a time, don’t you?” “Why do you always say that?” “Now why would you think?” He grabbed the pails, “Oh, remind me when we

get inside to give you the tranquilizers.” She froze and said, “I forgot all about them today! Isn’t that something? Maybe I won’t need them tonight.” “I’ll give you two and you can decide if you need them. You must have had a good day.” Joey suggested, “Do you want to talk or anything tonight?” “No, I’m actually tired. I bet you are very tired.” “I am and I need to get caught up on my sleep. I have to call my Beth and hit the sack.” He put his arm over her shoulder, “But if you want to talk, wake me up. Cause I can talk to you without being alert.” “I almost liked you there for a minute.” “I know. Boy, I must be tired to let my edge down like that.” Joey ruffled up her hair, “You know, I think it is going to rain tonight.” “Father Landers said it was in the forecast,” Autumn said as she tried to flatten her hair. “Now why did you do that?” He laughed, “It looked like it needed some puffing up.” “I know. I have been wearing it flat lately. I should try to do something with it and maybe not wear that beige suit for a while. My boxes never came today, so I don’t know what else I have with me. I was in the dumps when I packed.” “I would’ve never guessed.” Joey hung the pails in the barn and then said, “I bet Mom or my sisters would have something perkier to like brighten things up. Hell, I might even have something myself!” “You?” “I have perky stuff, but boys don’t call it perky. Never mind. We’ll ask Ma.” They didn’t ask that night because the older folks had gone to bed. The two went downstairs to their rooms and Joey brought her the two pills. She thanked him and said, “I’m going to try it without tonight.”

“Don’t go too long. If you start to get antsy, take one. You need your sleep so you don’t look like you’ve trekked the northern plains without an umbrella.” “Yikes Joey. Quit talking.” “Can’t,” he grinned, “I’m on my way to talk sweet nothings to my girl. So, I hope you don’t need the phone for like the next hour!” “Good night, Joey.” Autumn rummaged through her things and realized that nothing in it was in the least bit perky. She did have a navy blue tank top she could wear with the suit instead of that drab beige. Her headscarf was navy blue with swirls of bright peach and a bit of beige in it. She could maybe think of something to do what that to brighten up her outfit. Thankfully, she had brought her curlers and curling iron. She would go with some curls tomorrow. After her hot bath and a good soak, she lay on her bed. However, she was no longer one bit tired. When she heard Joey come downstairs, she opened the door, “Joey? Do you have something I could read? I don’t want to take a pill but I need to unwind.” “Sure, but if you like them. I have Moby Dick and Tale of Two Cities.” “Oh my Lord. I guess I will borrow Tale of Two Cities. Just what I need to read about to relax- the French Revolution!” When Joey returned with the book and handed it to her, she gave him a hug. “Thanks for everything you’ve done for me, Joey. How is Beth?” “Autumn, this being apart is for the birds. I can’t wait until she gets here. I love her so much. I know that you’ll like her and can be good friends.” “If you think so, I’m sure we will. You haven’t been wrong about much so far. Sleep well.” She went back to her room and then tried to figure out how to read in bed. That was something she had never mastered because of her tendency to cocoon herself. Finally, after wrapping the blankets into every shape imaginable, she got up and sat in the rocking chair in her room. The floor lamp was perfect and the

afghan was soft and comfy. There the young woman relaxed with her feet twisted up under her and began to read Charles Dickens’ famous novel. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times….” She read until her eyes could no longer focus. She knew she was tired enough to go to sleep, which she did promptly after she curled up in her protective shroud of blankets.

21-

Sometime during the night, it started to rain and was still going strong at daybreak. For some crazy reason, Autumn was actually looking forward to getting up. Maybe it was because she had enough drug-free rest or maybe it was that she was going to see Clarence. She had to it, she enjoyed his company. When she arrived upstairs, Alma was already up and stirring up some muffins. “Morning,” she smiled, “You look well-rested.” Autumn went to the window and watched it rain for a bit, “How are we going to take Redemption over to Schroeders in the rain?” “Redemption?” Auntie Alma asked, “That is a different name, but I kind of like it.” “Kid and I thought that it’d be nice. The horse’s name was Walla Walla.” “Like the onion?” “That’s the first thing I thought. Kid didn’t like it either so we changed it. Of course, if Father Landers doesn’t like it, he can change it again.” “To answer your question, Joey left a note for Sammy. He left a note back when he got home. He will ride Redemption over to Schroeders when he gets up. They don’t want to load him in the horse trailer unless they have to. Horses usually don’t like that much.” “But it is raining.” “Horses don’t shrink outside in the rain.” Auntie Alma smiled, “It’s supposed to stop raining by then. Could you cut up some melon for breakfast? I have sausage and egg pie in the oven, but I need to figure out what to bring to Schroeders.” “Auntie Alma, Joey said there will be about a hundred people there today!”

“More like seventy, but yes, there will be.” “What are you going to cook for that many?” “I’m not. Everyone brings something, usually more than their own group can eat. So, there is always a big variety and several dishes. I thought I’d make some au gratin potatoes. What do you think?” “Sounds good to me. What happens if everyone brings potatoes?” “Then we would have a lot of them!” Auntie Alma chuckled. “But I know that Nora is baking a humungous ham and she said that Mo is bringing a roasted turkey. So, we are safe.” “I was amazed yesterday at how many people live at Schroeders house. There is Grandma, Kathleen, Kid, and the Grey Hawk kids.” Auntie Alma continued, “Andy and his wife, Annie, and Jackson, who is the Grey Hawk’s step brother. Pepper and her husband, Chris, are here for the summer. That’s not really so many. There have been times when there were more.” “Amazing.” Autumn smiled, as she took out the cantaloupe, “I was very surprised how those priests and Sister Abigail got along.” “Why is that?” “Oh, I guess I just figured they only prayed and acted stuffy all the time.” Alma laughed, “Vicaro is a clown and Bart is like one of our kids. When he first arrived, he was all rules and damnation, but he got over that pretty fast hanging around Vicaro. Landers is a dear soul who just calms the waters and tries to keep everyone from going off the deep end. Poor Sister loves her ‘men’ although they drive her crazy.” “She said something about working at a lumber camp?” “Yes, when she was young, she was the cook called Half Pint in a logging camp. She married a logger and they had twins. Sadly, within a couple years, both of her sons and her husband had died. She had a tough time of it, but finally came

through it all. She is a sweetheart. Jeff, who is engaged to Kathleen, took her out west when her mother was dying. In fact, that is when he met Kathleen.” “I heard Kathleen is her niece. She seems like a nice person.” “She is and I really like her. She is a family counselor. As soon as she is well enough, she will be working in Bismarck in Dr. Samuels office.” “Really?” Autumn asked, “How badly was she injured in that car accident?” “Broken pelvis, cracked ribs and legs, and cuts all over A mess.” “Sounds like it. Did that happen here?” “No, in Montana. There was a man who became obsessed with her, stalked her and then purposefully drove her off the road. He evaded capture, so her family moved her away until he could be caught. She was going to stay with Sister Abigail, but then realized that she wouldn’t be able to maneuver stairs for some time. So, she came to Schroeders.” Auntie Alma continued, “Since she and Jeff were sweet on each other and he lived across the road at the Petunia Patch, it worked out for everyone.” “Okay, stop and let me simmer with this for a while.” Autumn grimaced, “Are the men still sleeping?” “Oh no. They went outside before you got up. They were going to check on the horses. What do you think of your horse?” “I think she is very nice. I hope I can learn to ride her soon. Auntie? I was curious about something. Can priests actually own stuff?” “I don’t know how it exactly works, but with the horses I know what we do. We just give them their horse and then keep them at one of our places. It is their horse to ride but no bill of sale. You know?” Alma smiled, “It is just theirs to anyone that matters. Darrell keeps Slick’s horse with his stock and I guess Landers will keep his horse with ours. Sister can’t ride because of a back injury when she was young and Vicaro is too busy playing spy to even want to ride. Besides, he was probably the foreman while they built the ark, so he is a little old for a saddle!”

“They are a fun bunch.” Autumn set the table, “How did Schroeders come about adopting the Grey Hawk kids?” “When Andy Schroeder was in Vietnam, he became best friends with Jackson Fielding. When they were in the same firefight and flown back to the States. Jackson was sent to the VA hospital near his reservation, and of course, Andy was sent home with two artificial knees while Jackson lost a foot. “Things weren’t so good for Jackson. His widowed mother had married Clayton Grey Hawk, but sadly, they were both roaring alcoholics. Mrs. Grey Hawk had died shortly after Clancy was born, but it sounds like for some time before, Clarence was the sole caregiver for the kids. When their mom died, Clayton married Mrs. Fielding and that’s when the kids all met Jackson, since he was their stepbrother. After being so badly injured in the war, Jackson lost more of his leg to gangrene and infection. He could have gone home. However, his home was not able to care for him. It was a three-room shack, no insulation, running water, or that sort of thing. They had to carry water in a pail down a ravine from the creek below. Marly’s husband, Byron, had been corresponding with Jackson while he was in Vietnam, so he knew what was going on. He loaded up the station wagon and went to South Dakota. They asked Jackson’s mom to sign custody over to Byron since the legal age was still 21. You know, the law just changed to 18 a few months ago. At any rate, they brought Jackson home with them and he did his recovery at Schroeders.” “Why not Byron’s place?” “Stairs again. Boy was Little Charlie put out about that! He wanted Jackson at his house in the worst way!” Alma giggled, “Anyway, it was a few months later when Clayton and Jackson’s mom were both killed in a car crash. Jackson was beside himself. He wasn’t well enough to care for the kids himself. The word was the kids would be put in foster care and likely split up. I don’t think any of the clan would have let that stand. When Schroeders took Jackson down for the funeral, they got permission to bring the Grey Hawks back with them as foster kids. It was approved by the Tribal Council because they would be with Jackson and everyone promised to teach them about their heritage. The adoption papers just came through the week of the Fourth of July.” “But they are still Grey Hawks and not Schroeders.”

“The kids were allowed to choose. Clarence wouldn’t change his name because of his father, but the rest just didn’t want to learn how to spell a new name.” Autumn smiled, “Clarence seems rather grown up for a kid.” “He had the entire responsibility for his siblings. I guess his father was abusive and I know he sure gave him a complex about not being very smart.” “Yes, Clarence mentioned his dad had said he was dumb. I think he is very bright.” “I know Jeannie sure thinks he is. Well, looks like our breakfast is just done in time. Here come the fellas.” The men came in and Joey teased, “Nice of you to us, Leaf Pile.” “It was a perfect morning until now.” Autumn scowled at him. Then she asked, “How are the horses?” “Good, and by the way, my ears are still ringing from that whistling you did.” “Probably just all the hot air rushing out from your head,” she smirked. “Touché,” he chuckled. “Oh Mom, do you have something for Old Leaves to wear so she doesn’t look like Sidney Sadsack?” Uncle George frowned, “Joey, you could try to be nicer to your cousin.” “I did. Didn’t work out.” The young man grinned, “So, what do you say, Mom?” “I think I have something. Are you going to work today?” “Nope. Monday afternoon at three. Why? Want me to go?” “It would be quieter.” Alma helped her find something to wear that wasn’t grim by rummaging through some of the girls clothes that ended up in the spare closet. “I don’t know how we managed to accumulate so much stuff here, but you would be surprised how many times it has come in handy. You know for spills and stuff. I hope your boxes get here soon. I bet you are anxious to get all your things.”

After breakfast dishes, the family got ready for church. Autumn curled her hair and wore her navy blue shell with the scarf tied around the collar. The scarf had enough beige in it so she could get away with wearing her beige shoes, since that was all she had. Instead of the beige pants suit, she wore one of her cousins’ navy blue pleated skirts and Alma lent her a pin for her scarf. She put on makeup and actually surprised herself how she looked. For one thing, she looked rested and maybe even on the cheerful side. When she came out of her room, Joey was just coming out of his room. He took one look and gave her a low wolf whistle, “Not too shabby.” She smiled and then looked him over. “You look pretty snazzy yourself- all suited up. I’m impressed.” After wrapping the large pan of au gratin potatoes in several towels, the family, except Sammy who was sleeping, headed off to Trinity Lutheran Church for the second service at eleven. Even though Byron was the senior pastor, he did not preach. He simply attended since he was recuperating from the removal of a brain tumor a few weeks previously. He was doing well, but still under strict orders to take it easy. Autumn enjoyed the service, even though it was much more formal than she was used to. There was none of the congregation shouting amen in agreement with the minister like at her church, even though there were many nods of agreement among the listeners. When she got to the car, she mentioned it to her family. “It seemed much more Catholic to me,” she announced. Uncle George laughed, “Not even close. Closer than what you are used to, I know, but sometime Joey will have to take you to St. Johns.” “How can it get more formal than this?” “It can,” Joey chuckled, “I was in awe the first time I went to St. Johns. You should really come with me sometime.” “I didn’t think outsiders were supposed to go to their church?” “You silly thing,” Alma giggled, “How else would they get more ?” “Oh, I never thought of that. I suppose I might sometime.”

Thankfully, it had quit raining and was actually quite nice. When they arrived at Schroeders, Elton said that Sam had just called, “After his coffee, he will ride Landers’ horse over. He should be here before lunch. I don’t think it is dry enough for a ride today, besides it is supposed to rain again this afternoon. I guess we will just have to ride him back over there. Kid said you guys named him Redemption?” Autumn blushed, “Do you think it is silly?” “I never heard of a horse named Redemption before, but I think it is a very good name.” By the time the crowd all assembled, Autumn was feeling like a fish out of water. She did recognize many of the people, but there were so many of them! She met Kincaids, and Brett helped Rain in. She was beautiful if you were into scrapes and bruises. The poor girl had definitely been on the losing end of the battle with the landslide. She said, “I was so pouty because everyone else got to meet you but me. I hope we can be friends. Maybe you could stop over some day to visit. Zach won’t let me out and about yet.” “Who is this Zach I always hear about?” Autumn asked. A 6’4” fair-haired young man came up behind her, “That would be me. I live right over Elton’s fence to the east. I’ve heard a lot about you, too. Clarence thinks you hung the moon.” She smiled, “Well, I think a lot of him. So, what do you do?” “I am a pediatric surgeon in Bismarck, but most of these folks are my patients. Mine or Pepper’s husband. Chris is a resident and will be leaving for Chicago General before long. I heard you are a ed nurse?” “Yes,” Autumn gulped, hoping they wouldn’t have to get into that. “We have a few medical types in the clan. Danny Schroeder’s sister, Megan Elizabeth is a RN and then Andy’s wife, Annie, is a paramedic. Her partner is another paramedic Marty Schroeder, who is Danny’s brother.”

“Here we go again! I get so confused,” Autumn scrunched up her face, “Is everyone related to everyone else?” “By George,” a pretty, petite blonde gal giggled, “I think you’ve got it! Hi, I’m Suzy Jeffries. I’m Nora’s cousin, Zach’s wife and Byron’s mistreated, longsuffering employee.” Byron wheeled up behind her and put his hand to his ear, “What’s that I hear? The sound of your salary dropping?” “Grinchboss, you could never do that to me. There are minimum wage laws!” “I might have to run for Congress and change that,” Byron groaned, “Autumn, will you be my campaign manager? “Sure, why not? If you don’t care how it’s done, I’m your girl.” “Don’t ever say ‘why not’ to Grinchboss. He will put you to work so fast you won’t your last name.” It was about quarter to one when the station wagon arrived bearing the St. John’s Contingency, as the clanners from St. John’s had been dubbed. Besides a scalloped corn casserole, they came in carrying all sorts of cookies. Father Vicaro grumped, “Sister Abigail made us turn over all our stashes of cookies. She is making us give them to you guys! I don’t get it.” “Maybe,” Clarence offered, “It is like our Sioux Virtue of generosity. We are supposed to give until our heart’s quit fluttering.” “Might be, young man, but my heart is fluttering big time!” “Maybe you care about the cookies too much.” “Yes, he certainly does!” Sister Abigail agreed. “And you know what these guys do? They ask the ladies to bring cookies to every meeting and then hide them in the rectory. That way they can nibble on them whenever they take a notion.” “I don’t know if we have a virtue about that,” Clarence said. “I know when we lived at Three Moccasin, we used to hide food. CJ was our best hider. He always had food some place so Dad couldn’t trade it away.”

“Hmm,” Bart looked around, “I might want to talk to him about some good hiding spots.” Landers gave Autumn a big smile after he put the corn casserole in the oven, “You’re looking pretty today.” “Thank you,” Autumn said. “I decided to cheer it up a bit.” “It looks good. I like it.” “Oh,” Elton said, as he came back inside the house, “If I can get you to quit flirting with the girls, all want you to see something.” “Me?” Landers was puzzled, but went toward the door. “It’s my fault,” Jerald explained. “I was out in Oregon and wouldn’t be back out there before September.” Kid smiled, “Come outside, everyone.” Landers was bewildered as Sammy brought the horse over to him, “This is from the clan, saddle and all for your birthday. We know your birthday isn’t until September, but we got your gift early.” The priest was speechless as he took the reins and then, with tears reddening his eyes, he patted the horse. He stammered, “I never imagined, you guys… you don’t need to do this. I mean, this is really something.” “Don’t you want to know about him?” “He is beautiful.. I do want.. What’s his name?” Kid grinned, “Autumn and I picked out his name. He was called Walla Walla, but we thought it sounded too onion-like, so we named him for you. If you don’t like it, you can change it.” “What is it?” “Redemption.” Now the tears did sneak down his cheeks, “That is wonderful. I love it, you

guys. And him. He is a wonderful gift. Thank you so much.” Joey stepped forward, “We would be happy to board him for free at our place. Of course, if you would like him someplace else, that’s okay too.” “Your place would be wonderful. This is the nicest thing. Did you see this, Sister?” “Yes,” she patted his back, “I did.” Landers shook his head, “You guys, this is a magnificent gift. You shouldn’t have, but I love it. And thank you, Kid and Autumn, for his name. That is very, ah- wonderful.” “Yea gads,” Vicaro groaned, “I’m going in now. I’m starving out here while you are patting your horse. Good grief.” Sammy suggested that he take Redemption down to the corral while the rest started dishing up. Landers went with him. Anyone could tell he was truly moved by the gift. As the folks began to move back into the house, Kid came up beside Autumn. “I think he really liked not only the horse, but the name you suggested. Great idea you had there. This is my fiancée, Savannah Graf. She works at the Retirement Home in Merton. Savvy, this is the new girl that I was telling you about. Won’t she be a grand addition to our clan?”

Autumn was surprised how comfortable she felt at the dinner. They all filled their plates and took their places at one of the six tables of twelve in the massive dining room. There was a huge rock fireplace on the west wall with nearly floor to ceiling windows on each side. The entire room was hardwood, oak, and rock. It was very warm and pleasant, with the crackling fire in the fireplace. There were several oak high chairs and stools beside the four double buffet hutches on the side walls. All the china, glassware and stainless steel matched, as did the table linens. Once everyone was seated, Pastor Marvin said grace and they began to eat. Autumn sat between Clarence and the medical resident, Chris Holloway. Across

from them sat Annie and Andy Schroeder. They were visiting about the camp out and the lack of Indians for the kids from the Grand Caymans. Then Annie, who was half Mandan Indian, grinned, “I have just the plan! My brother Travis is on leave from Vietnam. He’ll be in Dickinson over that time. I’ll invite him up for the camp out. Maybe Conrad can get off, too.” “Conrad?” Chris asked. “Yes, Conrad is my other brother and the counselor at Spirit Lake. I mean, if the kids aren’t fussy that some of the Indians are half-French,” she giggled. “The Mandan Indians were noted for being fair anyway. There was a rumor that maybe that was from the Vikings in olden times,” Byron suggested. “Elton, did you ask Johnny or Uncle Bear about coming?” “I don’t know if Johnny can make it, because he took off for the cookout, but I did ask Bear. He said he will see if he can make it. Mabel thought maybe her son and his family could come up, too.” Elton agreed, “First, we have to get the cookout under our belts.” Then the conversation degenerated into arrogant boasting and bold proclamations of the grandeur of their culinary skills. Clarence listened to them for a few minutes, and then whispered to Autumn, “Wasicu witko.” Autumn giggled and nodded. After dinner, Sam announced he was going back to the farm. He and Landers walked down to the corral. Sam headed home to get ready for work. Meanwhile, Keith took Uncle George and Autumn down to Elton’s garage and met Joey there. “Wanna see the yellow car?” “Sure.” Joey beamed, “I hope that doesn’t mean it is a lemon?” “Nope, in fact, it runs so well, I think I should up the price.” “Boy, I figured you were a crook. Your eyes are too close together!” Keith wagged his head, “You never stop, do you?”

Joey shrugged undaunted, “Haven’t yet.” Keith handed Autumn the keys, “Want to take it for a spin?” She giggled, “I’d love to.” “I’m coming along!” Joey opened the enger door, “I have to protect my investment.”

22-

By the time they had returned to the Schroeder place, the three had settled the sale on the car. Joey had now christened it the Banana. Joey would get the Banana ed the following week in Bismarck when he took Autumn in for her driving test. They went back into the house and found the clanners playing cards or board games. Autumn played Monopoly with some of the gals. By late afternoon, it was raining again. Jessups went home. Uncle George drove his car and Joey wanted to have a turn driving the Banana. That evening, it was very relaxing in the house. They had Beef Barley soup and chatted about the day. Then the older folks watched Bonanza before going to bed. Joey and Autumn walked out to check the horses. As they were petting Redemption and Traveller, Autumn said quietly, “I think Father Landers was very moved with his gift, don’t you? Do you know very much about him?” “I do think he liked his gift. He is the one of the St. John’s Contingent that anyone knows the least about. I’m sure the St. John’s people do, but he is usually quiet. We know quite a bit about the other three, but only his résumé. He said he is coming out tomorrow afternoon, if he can. Maybe you want to ask him.” “I could never ask him. First, he knows I am almost a criminal and besides, he is a priest.” “Yea gads,” Joey shook his head, “Where do you get you are almost a criminal? And he is a human being. Don’t pigeon hole him because of his vocation. Maybe he’d like to have a friend. Ever think of that?” “No, I didn’t. Joey, I’ve never thought much about any of that stuff. And he agreed that while I didn’t commit a crime— oh, did I tell you he called and checked with an attorney about my legal liability?” “You didn’t, but I’m glad he did. I was thinking about calling our attorney, Mr. Wolf, myself.”

“That’s who he called! He said that unless I actually conspired to beat up Brad, I was okay and that I was not required to tell the police my suspicions, unless they asked me. They actually never talked to me at all. I just happened to be there when they talked to his parents, so I didn’t obstruct justice. And of course, when they asked them if he had any enemies, they said no. Everyone simply loved Brad.” Autumn sighed, “I was very relieved that Landers found out though. I’d been quite worried I’d end up in jail.” “You’d make a lousy inmate,” Joey scowled. “Why do you say that? Huh? I would be a good…” She stopped and glared at him, “Doggone you. Why do you always do that to me?” “Because it is just so very easy!” Joey wagged his head “What were you going to say before you told me about Wolf?” “Oh, Landers said that what I did wasn’t right. He pointed out a lot of not so pretty stuff I had been deluding myself about. He was nice about how he said it without sugar coating it. I don’t think I need any more sugar right now, especially since I have some things to face.” “Like what, if you don’t mind talking about them?” “One thing is that I have to face the fact that I really wanted Brad knocked off his pedestal and that I probably had resented his hero image for a long time.” She looked at her cousin, “You know, since he pointed that out, I realize more and more that it really did bug me for a long time everyone thought I was so fortunate to have him even give me the time of day. I knew he wasn’t a saint.” “That isn’t a good way to feel. I imagine since everyone thought he could do no wrong, he felt entitled to mess around. I can tell you this, kiddo. Even though I give you grief, you would be a great catch for any guy. If they don’t appreciate you, they are stupid.” “Thanks.” “However, once they get to know you, I guess the jig is up, huh?” “Seems to be the case, at that. What are your plans when Beth realizes there is no cure for you?”

“I’m just hoping she’ll get used to me hanging around before then.” “Good luck with that!” She giggled and then became serious again, “Landers asked if maybe the reason I didn’t tell everyone the whole story of what happened was to cover up my weaknesses.” Joey was thoughtful, “What do you think?” “At first. I thought I was doing it just to protect the Vander Vorsts. And besides, what good would there be in dragging out all the dirt? You know how Mother hates that sort of thing. However, I was very upset that Brad simply became more of a hero upon his death. I really wanted people to know how horrible he was. Landers said I can’t have it both ways.” Joey asked, “Does it really matter all that much what everyone in your hometown thinks?” “In a way it does. I know I need to talk to Mother and Dad. It would just be easier for me to not have to cover up so many things. I’m not ready to do that yet. I thought I might start with your Mom. But what if she tells me to leave?” Joey smiled broadly, “She hasn’t kicked me out yet, although I did notice she put new steel toes on her boots after my last adventure!” “I doubt you’ve ever been as awful as I was.” “Ha! Let’s not go down that road. A sin is a sin,” Joey said flatly. “So what did you think of the big scary clan?” “I like them. I couldn’t believe how so many people could be together and it could still feel homey and comfortable. I was expecting it to be like a convention.” “It is, every Sunday. Naturally, everyone doesn’t make it every week, but we all know we are welcome. It is like being home. Elton calls it our landing strip. Of course, maybe I feel more that way because we have a large family. I mean there were nine of us.” Joey grinned, “What are your plans for tomorrow?” “I guess not much.”

“What do you mean? Kid will be over to help give you the basics of riding and taking care of the tack.” “What’s this tack stuff?” “Saddles, halters, and such. Then you better make arrangements with Clarence for your work and also talk sweet to Darrell about getting the milk or cream that you need. Let’s see, I think Landers will come out if he can get away. Maybe you guys can go riding.” “Me and him, alone? Does he know how to ride?” “Yes, he has been doing it for several months now, he just didn’t have his own horse. If you get into trouble, he can drag your carcass home for burial.” Autumn pursed her lips and stared at him, “Poor Beth.”

That night after reading for a while, Autumn curled up in her bandaging of blankets. She never even realized that she had neither thought about nor taken a tranquilizer. During the night, the wind came up and rattled everything around in the yard. Then she heard Sammy come home and take his shower. From that point on, she was restless. She started to think. Before long, she had herself in a state. It started simply enough. She was thinking about everything that had gone on since she was in North Dakota. Before long, she worried she had created a situation where her circle in Georgia thought she was mourning her beloved’s loss and the people in her circle up here thought she hated him. She honestly didn’t feel either way about him. She had loved him, although it was jaded. Now she hated that she still missed him. He was not as perfect as everyone thought he was, but who is? Perhaps she wasn’t very understanding toward him. Maybe he was just so lonesome he couldn’t stand it and Camille had come on to him. He was too polite to fend her off. Or maybe she had imagined the whole thing in her mind. Maybe none of it was his fault, and then he was embarrassed to tell her about it. He was still planning to marry her. That was obvious, so what was her problem?

Or maybe she was the one that had the problem, whining about being lucky. What an idiot! She was lucky. She had the best catch in Dannonville. She should have considered it an honor. She instead acted like a baby, overreacted about the whole thing, and ended up hurting a wonderful person. Before too long, she was crying so hard she almost choked in her protective wrapping. Though she tried to be quiet, apparently she wasn’t. Within minutes, Joey was in her room unpacking her. “Woman, you really have to quit doing wrapping up like that! I’m surprised you don’t use duct tape!” He helped her sit up and get some air. She gasped, “I nearly suffocated in there!” “I’m not surprised,” he said as he handed her the tissue box. “Do you need another tranquilizer?” “No, I haven’t taken any for two days. I thought I was all over it.” “Things aren’t that black and white. Let me get you one.” When he returned with her pill and some water, he asked, “Want to go sit on the patio with some coffee? Sammy made some when he got home.” “Why not?” She said as she got her feet out of the tangle of bedding.

A few minutes later, with Gladys at their feet, they were sitting on the patio enjoying a cup of coffee. It was still dark, but nice out. “It’s pretty here,” she commented. “Simply wonderful scenery. So, what was it? Was it still the guilt thing? Or the anger thing?” “Both. It’s such a jumble. I realized that I really did care about Brad and I miss him terribly. It bothers me that I talk so awful about him. I mean, we did have a nearly perfect relationship. Maybe it was because we were apart that last year that he messed around and I just blew it up to be unfaithfulness.” Joey shook his head, “That is being unfaithful, doorknob.”

“I know, but maybe that girl made a move on him and he couldn’t resist.” Joey sat straight up, “Unless he was drugged, he could resist if he wanted to. Men can resist. It isn’t always the most fun, but if you make a commitment to someone, you need to do that… no matter how lonely you are. Good grief, did you crawl in the sack with every attractive man you encountered while he was in Atlanta? You were lonely, too.” “I always heard it is different for men.” Joey laughed, “Yes, a myth perpetrated by men! If you want to buy into it, go for it. Would Brad have been understanding if you told him that you were lonely and had a couple mint juleps too many and got pregnant? He was pregnant you know, except that Camille was carrying the baby instead of him. That is the only difference. How understanding would he have been?” Autumn started to cry, “He wouldn’t have been. I know, but I thought I loved him, Joey. Could I have been that wrong about him?” “Of course, it happens,” Joey rubbed her shoulder. Autumn studied her cousin, “You know Beth might just get used to having you hang around.” Joey chuckled, “I can only hope. Anyway, I’m starving. What do you say that we make a big breakfast and surprise the folks! It’s a little after four. Let’s get dressed and meet in the kitchen in about five minutes! What do you want, sausage or ham?” “Bacon.” He grinned. “I guess I can deal with bacon.” The older folks were up as breakfast was being placed on the table. The two chefs had produced golden hash browns, scrambled eggs, and toast to accompany the bacon. Uncle George was pleased with the menu and Auntie Alma was pleased they had prepared it. During breakfast, Kid called and asked if it would be okay with Autumn if he came over early, since someone had brought in a Chevy that needed body work.

She said it would be. Then Clarence called to speak to Autumn. “Miss Autumn, I can ask Mr. Darrell if I can trade him some of my hours for cream and milk for our pies?” “You don’t have to do that!” “But we are partners!” “Okay, but ask him if we can both do it. I’ll help with the milking, too.” “That would be so way cool, “ Clarence said, “I’ll tell him. Mr. Darrell said it is supposed to rain tomorrow, so maybe that would be a good day to make the caramel and fudge stuff.” “Let’s plan on that,” Autumn said. “I’ll bring you home with me after morning chores tomorrow.” “Okay,” Clarence answered excitedly, “I think it will be fun.” When Autumn relayed the information to the family, Alma said, “That is unusual for him to be that excited about anything. He is usually very serious.” Uncle George added, “I would be excited if I had a pretty girl want to make fudge and caramel with me!” They were just putting the dishes away when Kid drove in. Joey went with them to the corral and listened while Kid explained the necessity of taking care of the tack and keeping it repaired. Joey showed them where the tack and the cleaning supplies were kept. Then he went to feed the horses, while Kid taught Autumn how to saddle her horse. After she put the saddle and bridle off and on about a dozen times, she figured she had the hang of it. Kid grinned, “Everyone hates doing that but if you don’t get that right, the rest doesn’t work out very well. At any rate, I’d better hustle. I want to be at the shop before Kevin tows that car out. Any questions, give me a yell.” “Thanks, Kid,” Autumn beamed. “Except for the fact I never want to see a saddle again in forever, it was fun!” After he left, Autumn asked Joey, “Could you take me out for a ride?”

“Saddle up, sweetheart. We’ll hit the trails. Let me run in and tell the folks.” Autumn was so excited when they rode out of the corral. Alma was there with her camera and took a couple photos of her first ride on Traveller. Even though she never thought she wanted a horse, she was very excited. Joey taught her all sorts of things about the basics of riding and about horses. They had a good time, but she had to it she was ready to go back when he looked at his watch. “Man, I have to hustle. I have to go to work today and I almost forgot about it.” “I must wear you out.” “It’d be nice if you slept more consistently. I might suggest that you sleep with a garden hose in your mummy. So you can get some air! Good grief lady, why do you do that?” She shrugged, “I always have. It feels so safe and warm all bundled up like that.” “If the house was on fire, I don’t know what you’d do!” “Great! Glad you said that! Now I have something else to worry about!”

23-

Right after lunch, the delivery truck drove up with several boxes for Autumn. She was glad that Sammy was awake to help her carry them down to her room. Even though he went on about how she had hundreds of boxes of clothes, it was actually only seven and contained more than clothes. It was everything she owned. Her father had included the check for the sale of her old car, so she had some money. She was helping Alma clean the bedrooms, Joey had left for work, and the other men were outside. She decided it would be a good time to explain things to her aunt. The woman had been a saint to not bug her, but Autumn knew she must be wondering what kind of a squirrel she’d invited into her home. They were scrubbing and waxing the hardwood floor in the master bedroom, when Autumn said, “Auntie Alma, I need to talk to you about what’s been going on.” “It’s not necessary,” Alma said. “Sometimes a person needs to just be for a bit. But if you want to, I’m here. I hope the boys have been giving you .” “Oh, they have both been great. Don’t tell them, but they’re fine people. See there is more to Brad’s death than just him dying.” “I figured. Paul Harvey calls it, ‘the rest of the story’. Often, that is what makes the whole difference.” “The afternoon that Brad died, I worked in the emergency room at my new job for the first time…” Autumn explained about Camille and her death. It was a lot easier than she had imagined. Alma listened but didn’t say much either way, except the occasional ‘oh no’. She told her about running out of the emergency room, but never mentioned what she did when she got home. Then she fell silent. As they were moving the queen-sized bed back into place, Alma asked, “That is

why you lost your job then? I know your mother wondered about that. I take it you never told her.” “No, I didn’t. You know Mother. Mother has never approved of talking about that kind of stuff. She thought life should be perfect. Things unraveled that afternoon when the policemen came to the house. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to be saying horrible things about him when he had just died. Honestly, I only wanted to hurt him. I was almost glad that he was dead, but I felt awful that I felt that way!” “If it had been me, I would’ve wanted to strangle him!” Alma shook her head. “I know it doesn’t sound very nice, but I probably wouldn’t have been able to keep my big trap shut.” “Auntie, what I did was even worse.” Autumn sat on the edge of the bed. “I didn’t tell you all of it. When I got home, I was taking a shower and the phone rang…” Then she explained about Jake’s call and was surprised at her aunt’s reaction. The kindly lady sat on the edge of the bed, “Good gawd all Friday! I’d have done the same thing if not a pile more! No wonder this is such a bearcat for you! I would’ve been madder than a wet cat on a rowboat that he died right then! What a rotten turn of events. He managed to squirm out of it and left you with the burden. That denied you the joy of telling him off! Some folks have all the luck!” Autumn had to laugh, “My god Auntie, I’d have never thought you’d say that!” “Honey, I’m not a demure Southern belle like the rest of the girls in my family. I’m more of the back hills, where’s my shotgun, kind of gal. Not to say it is a good way to be, but it’s a fate I must contend with! Over time, my nature has sent me to my knees in more than one pew. If George had put me in that predicament, I would’ve skinned him alive with a dull knife!” “Here I thought I was a wild one.” “Girl, sometimes bottling things up, only makes them fizz more. You allowed yourself to get all pent up. Be careful about that because you don’t always know where you’re going to blow! Now I bet you are feeling like a dirty bird for being so heartless toward him.”

“Yes, I am and it was not the moral thing to do. You know, I did love him. Really I did.” “I’m certain of that. Just because you love someone, doesn’t follow they are deserving of it. And as far as morality, I’m sure it isn’t the Christian way to seek revenge.” Alma giggled, “Myself, I often tend to take that into my own hands. I know that God will do it, but I just want to make sure that I’m still alive to see it happen, so I tend to speed things along!” “Auntie Alma!” “No. I really don’t as often as I’d like. I have learned over the years that His way is usually the best. Sometimes He comes up with a lot better s that I would’ve ever puzzled out myself. Besides, then I don’t have to feel bad about it. My guess is you have been doing.” “Yes. I feel guilty, angry, sad, and betrayed. And what’s worse, I am still lonely for him!” Then she started to cry again. Her aunt put her arms around her and gave her a hug, “I do believe that. Okay, we need to get past this so you can be happy again! Let’s put our scrub pail away and then you need to get the red out of your eyes. I think I heard a car drive over to the corral and it is likely Father Landers.”

After Alma called the rectory to clear it with Sister Abigail, Alma motioned for Landers to come in. “I invited you for dinner and Sister said as long as you only eat one piece of pie, you can stay. I promised, but I didn’t make her any promises about the cinnamon spice cake I have on the counter.” “You’re a duplicitous one,” Landers chuckled. “Do you have a magnet on your moral com?” “I do at that.” Alma laughed, “Autumn will be up in a minute. I had her moving furniture with me, so she’s might frazzled.” Sammy laughed, “I’m going riding with them today. We have the horses saddled already, so she waited long enough for her grand entry.”

“Good,” Autumn smiled as she came up the steps from her room, “Sorry I was late.” “That’s okay,” Landers smiled, “The time was put to good use. I received a dinner invitation.” “Oh, where are you going?” she asked. Sammy crossed her eyes, “He’s invited here. Really Leaf Pile, what do you think sometimes?” “As little as possible,” Uncle George smirked. The young lady pouted, “Uncle George, I’m hurt.” “Yah, yah.” The man said, “Ma and I will be here waiting dinner for your return. Mind you, if it is ready before you return, we’ll eat without you. No point in everyone having their dinner ruined.”

The ride was fun and they went a long way. By the time they got back, Autumn was feeling comfortable in the saddle. They visited a lot about the cookout and the camp out, but nothing of her any personal problems. Autumn was glad for that. She had enough emotion for one day. It seemed the cookout had simply grown by leaps and bounds. Everyone at St. Johns had an entry. Father Landers and Slick were partners with their marinated roasted turkey. “Is it an old family recipe?” Autumn asked. “No. Bart and I found it in a magazine a while back and really liked it.” “What sort of foods did your family prefer?” “I never knew my family or anything about it.” Sammy frowned, “If it isn’t private, how did that happen?” “Well, I was literally left in a basket, albeit a laundry basket, inside the entry of a

Catholic church in St. Augustine, Florida. It was about Thanksgiving time and I was wearing a diaper and wrapped in a dark blue knitted shawl. Inside the basket was a note, “Benjamin Dorian Landers. September 19, 1930. Please love my little boy.” “Oh,” Autumn swallowed hard, “That is so sad. So, you are from Florida?” “I was found in Florida. Might have been born in Egypt for all I know.” “Yes, Moses.” Sammy laughed, “I really doubt that.” “Whoever left you there obviously cared for you,” Autumn offered. Landers gave her a surprised look, “Why would you say that?” “Because the note said ‘please love my little boy’. That’s not something you would say if you were just going to dump someone. I’m just going to believe that.” “That is kind to say and I appreciate it. Actually, I prefer that scenario myself but the truth has always been elusive. I guess the good Lord doesn’t think it is necessary for me to know.” “So, you were raised in St. Augustine?” Sam asked. “No, they sent me to an orphanage in Tennessee. Why? I have no idea. So, my home was St. Elizabeth’s Home, Gatlinburg, Tennessee. It was a nice place.” “Did you ever get adopted out or anything?” Sam asked. “No, there wasn’t much adopting during the Great Depression. I guess too many folks couldn’t afford the children they had, so they didn’t need any more. I just lived there.” “So, that is why you became a priest?” Landers laughed, “It had a lot to do with it. Actually, it was because of the dear lady, Sister Agnes. She was there at the orphanage the whole time I was there. I loved her. I used to pretend that she was my mom. She would have been a good one. She was there with the wallops or the praise, always telling me that God

had a purpose for my life.” “Is she still there?” “No, she died of pneumonia when I was sixteen. After that, I went off the deep end. I rebelled, partly because of that, but most likely my age and hormones had a part in that too. I ran off. One day I just packed my change of clothes and took off for greener pastures.” Autumn frowned, “Then how did you become a priest?” “You certainly are a busybody!” He chuckled, “I ran off with a carnival that was attached to a circus. I traveled with them for the better part of a year. Now, there are some fine folks who travel with them. There are some interesting ones who are not so fine. I managed to get myself arrested in Cleveland for stealing a few wallets and landed in the hoosegow. The carnival had to move on with their schedule, so I was left with only myself as company. I had no idea what to do and started serving my six month sentence. One day, a priest came in to see the guy in the next cell and as I listened to him, I became homesick. As he was leaving, I asked if he’d speak with me. He did and the rest is history. After I served my time, I was released under his supervision and he saw to it that I finished high school. It seemed natural to go to seminary. Then I became an Army chaplain which led me to the Veterans rehab place in California.” “That’s still a long ways from the North Dakota prairies,” Sammy observed. “It is, but after several years with shell-shocked or battle fatigued veterans and then the last seven years with addictions, I was ready for a change. I asked the diocese for something altogether different. They had this job for an interim priest to help out in Merton, North Dakota. I thought, ‘now that is altogether different!’ So, here I am!” Sam frowned, “I thought someone said once you had family in Jamestown?” “I had a friend, a counselor in Jamestown, I used to visit him and his family.” “That was likely what I heard.” Autumn mulled over the conversation and then groaned, “Oh no! Interim! You mean you’re only here for short time? I don’t like that!”

“Thanks, but no.” He smiled, “After Vicaro’s leg got better, the diocese realized that there was more work here than for just two. Bart is busy full-time at the high school teaching and doing istrative things. Vicaro is slowing down. The man has been at it for eons and is entitled. So, the men in power want me here for the duration.” Then he laughed, “Or until they change their minds!” “I never imagined anything like that. I thought all priests were always priests. I didn’t know,” Autumn muttered, “I mean they never did anything but priest stuff. Carnival people are like gypsies and are so different. I mean, you can always trust a priest but never trust a carney.” “It would be nice if life was that simple. It would be nice if bad guys were born wearing stripes and good guys had halos. The truth of it is folks are such a jumble, most of us would end up in Joker outfits!” Everyone laughed, but Autumn was more than a little taken back. Not that she thought any less of Landers, because in fact, she actually thought more of him. She just didn’t understand his life to any degree. Maybe Joey was right. Someday she would have to talk to him more about it. When they returned to the yard, Alma called from the porch, “Samuel, Bonnie is on the phone for you!” Sam got off his horse and handed the reins to Landers, “I have to get that!” Landers grinned, “Autumn and I will put your horse away.” “Thanks,” Sammy said as he ran toward the house. Landers winked to Autumn, “Think he even heard what I said?” She giggled, “No, probably not.” While they were taking the gear off the horses and brushing them down, Autumn was very quiet. Finally Landers spoke, hardly above a whisper, “I’m sorry I told you anything about my life. I feel like you disapprove of me now.” She froze, “No, not at all. I’m just trying to understand it. You know, I actually kinda like it. I’m pretty naive. I usually thought stuff just always happened the same way. Girls grew up, went to school, fell in love, got married, had babies,

and lived happily ever after with a man she could trust who loved her and their children. When their children were grown, they would on. Then it would just repeat. I knew there were other people’s whose lives weren’t like that, but I always thought a person could tell. I guess by looking at them.” She turned to look at him, “I’m sorry I was so nosy.” Landers nodded, “Want to know something? Other than the folks with the church, no one has ever asked me about my personal life. It was different today that you did.” “Did it upset you?” “No, this might sound a bit silly, but I’m selfishly pleased that someone cared enough to wonder. Most folks don’t, I guess. We are in the clergy and it is not supposed to be .” “Many of folks think a lot of you.” “Being here and part of this clan is something I have never encountered before. It has been a blessing to me in more ways than you can imagine.” “I can see where it would be. I like it too, although I don’t know them very well. My family is close, but not like Auntie Alma and Uncle George. These guys are down to earth. My family is very concerned about what is proper and polite, more like a committee. Everything has to be acceptable to society, you know. Never indiscrete or that would anyway sully the sacred family reputation. Some of that is good, but like Joey says, a person needs to feel that if you wipe the manure off, you are still allowed to sit at the table.” “Sounds like our Joey!” Landers laughed, and then became more serious, “How have you been doing since we talked?” “Better and doing a lot of thinking.” “I hope you didn’t feel I was too tough on you.” “Not at all. I needed it. Like I said, too much polite and proper just doesn’t get it sometimes. I’d like to talk to you again when you have time. I am sorry about a lot of what I did, but I also think I still don’t want to let go of it all. Is that bad?”

Landers made the last few brushes on Redemption’s side, “No. I’m glad you are giving it some serious thought. You know, God will forgive you before you are completely sure. I didn’t want to leave you with the idea that He is won’t unless you work it all out. He’ll even forgive you for not being sure.” “Like He is forgiving me as I go along. Is that right?” “I guess that about covers it. Are you finished with Traveller? What do you say we brush down Evinrude for Sammy? ” Landers smiled, “Can you believe he named his horse Evinrude?” “You know Sammy.” Landers nodded, “Good point.”

In a short time, they gathered at the dining room table. Father Landers said grace before they ate a fine meal of mustard baked pork chops and oven-browned potatoes. Landers commented about how much he loved those pork chops and thought they went very well with the steamed broccoli. He only stayed long enough to help clear the table and then had to get back to Merton. “I have a meeting at eight, so better head out. I had a wonderful time this afternoon. Thank you for the great dinner and company.”

That night, Autumn took a tranquilizer after her bath. She was also careful to loosen her wrapping some before she fell asleep, thinking about a house fire. Besides, choking the night before was a stupid thing to do. She slept soundly and didn’t hear Joey check on her when he came home. He had made her promise not to lock her bedroom door again, after the night when she took too many pills. She had crazy dreams that night. They were of nuns working on Camille, carnival barkers selling Dakota Mud Pies and horsemen carrying baskets of babies.

24-

When her alarm went off that morning, she actually managed to get it turned off before it woke the boys. She enjoyed picking out what to wear for a change, since she actually had a choice. She had her blue jeans, of course, but chose a bright pink top. She was almost giddy about it. Then she poured herself a cup of coffee that Joey had made when he got home and was looking for the Banana keys, when Sammy came up the steps. She gasped, “Oh, I hope I didn’t wake you.” “No,” Sammy grinned, “I was getting up anyway. I’m going over to help Darrell milk today. I heard his right hand man will be hanging out with his lady friend today.” “Really,” she frowned, “Which guy is that?” “Clarence. You guys are working on some candy or something today, right?” “I don’t think that you should tease Clarence about that. He was just being a nice to offer to help me.” “I know, but that never stopped any of us before.” Autumn groaned. “I’m about ready to leave, so you can ride with me.” “Do you have a driver’s license?” “My license from Georgia is valid yet. Really, you guys act like I just got off the boat.” “Not really.” Sammy raised his eyebrows, “I thought were just a ditz.” “I’m leaving!” Autumn growled. “Got your coffee poured yet?” Sammy was standing there with his mug in his hand, looking like he had lost something. She watched him a minute before she asked, “Now what?”

“Looking for my crash helmet!” She crossed her eyes, “You coming with or not?”

The two helped milk and then Autumn collected a couple gallons of cream. “It is thick, heavy cream,” Jeannie assured her. “I told Darrell that is what you needed.” “Thanks,” Autumn nodded, “Clarence and I will be back in time for chores tonight.” “Good deal, he is so looking forward to today.” Clarence came running out of the house, having washed up, and changed his clothes, “I hope you weren’t waiting for me!” “No. Just in time.” “This will be so fun. I hope it’s better than that grinding stuff.” He giggled, “We really had a big pile of crumbs when we were finished, didn’t we?” “We certainly did. I hope we never have to make twenty pies at once again!” “We’ll go to the movies, right?” “Right.” When they got to Jessups, Alma had muffins and fried ham set out for their breakfast. They got to work, measuring, stirring, and boiling the fudge. Clarence became adept at using the candy thermometer. After beating it, the fudge was spread on the bottom and sides of each pie. It was more work than they thought. At first, it was fun to swipe a taste of the homemade fudge, but by ten-thirty, they decided that neither of them liked fudge anymore. Next they shelled and chopped the pecans. They placed the layers of pecans only half the pies, since they decided that not everyone might eat them. They marked the pie tins to tell which ones were pecan-free. After lunch, Alma suggested they take a break. Autumn took Clarence over to

the barn to show him her horse, Traveller, whom he hadn’t met before. He was impressed and really liked his gray color on the tips of his ears, mane, and tail. “He is a really neat horse. Have you gone riding yet?” “A couple times. I’m not nearly as good as you, but I’m learning.” “Mister says that’s all anyone can ask. I know some people expect a lot more, but they don’t have the business to. Mister says everybody starts out without knowing everything. Do you think he is right?” “Yes. I think he is a wise man.” As he was petting Traveller, the nine-year old asked, “Do you think anybody will ever think that I’m wise?” “I do. In fact, you are already very wise about a lot of things.” “Really?” the boy’s eyes sprang open. “Cool. Is this Father Landers’ horse?” “Yes, his name is Redemption.” “That is a long name, but you know what? Little Charlie named his colt Conqueror, but he said he is going to call it Connie because he is afraid he will fall asleep before he says it all.” The kid scrunched up his face, “I’m glad that CJ and Charlie are best friends. I don’t think other people can stand them so much.” “They do have a good time together.” “Do we?” “Yes sir. We have a very good time. Are you going on the camp out when those people come?” Autumn asked. “Yes. I hope you can come, too. See, these boys, Gordy and Winchester, were on the island when the pirates came after Mister and Missus. They were very brave and never tattled where they were hiding. Isn’t that something? I am glad they didn’t tell. I don’t like having people die all the time. Do you?” “No, Clarence. I certainly don’t.”

“Miss Jeannie said your husband died, huh?” “He died a couple days before we were married.” “What happened?” “He was in a car accident.” “So was my dad and my second mom. You know, my dad had too much to drink and probably didn’t see where he was going. He drank something fierce. I heard folks say that he wasn’t a good man, but they just didn’t know the good part of him. I was lucky, because I did. So, even though I get upset some days when I think about him trading away our food for whiskey, I the times when he was good. One time, he showed us big boys how to build a fire to keep warm. We didn’t have any fuel in the tank and we’d been so cold. He and my second mom were going over to Spotted Calf’s place but us kids had to be at home. Clancy and Kitten were kinda sick, so they couldn’t go visiting. So, my dad showed us boys how to build a fire to keep warm, heat up water, and stuff. No matter what other people say about my dad, I those things that he did for us. I still love him.” Autumn gave him a hug so he wouldn’t see she had teared up. She thought to herself, ‘This little boy is a lot wiser than I am.’ Then she said, “You are a fine young man, but guess what? We have to go make caramel now.” “Will we like that better than the fudge?” “I don’t know. We started out thinking we liked the fudge a lot.” “We had too many tastes.” Clarence thought, “Maybe we should only have one taste of the caramel.” “Good idea.” The two had problems with their first batch of caramel and scorched. Clarence was bummed about it, but Uncle George said he did a lot better than he had done. Clarence asked, “Did you burn yours, too?” “No, but I never even tried to make any! Anyone that tries is always ahead of the person who never tried at all!” Uncle George laughed. “I say we have a coffee

break and eat come spice cake. I always do better on a full stomach.” Clarence giggled, “I usually fall asleep.” George Jessup laughed, “Me, too. But after my nap, I can tackle about anything!” The rest of the caramel turned out very well. They didn’t need to make as much of it as the fudge since was only on the bottom of each pie and not on the sides. Then they shredded some dark chocolate for the top of the whipped cream, so they would have that ready to sprinkle on for the final touch. “The good news is, Clarence, that we are getting down to the easier stuff. Today’s job was the most difficult.” Autumn explained. “You are now a fudge and caramel maker expert.” “Maybe, but I don’t like it much. I’d rather read a book.” Uncle George patted him on the shoulder, “But isn’t it nice to have a piece of candy to eat while you are reading?” “I might like raisins better.” After helping with evening chores again and returning home for a nice dinner of baked chicken and mashed potatoes, Autumn volunteered to wash dishes. Sammy offered to dry and put away. As they were finishing up, he asked her if she wanted to go for a short horseback ride. “I’m kinda tired, but I think I’d like that.” The two went for a short ride and t fed the oats to all the horses. Sammy was dutifully impressed with her whistle. When they put the pails back in the barn, he asked, “How have you been feeling? I don’t know if Joey has something that he does for you that I should know about.” “No. You guys really don’t have to babysit me. I’m a big girl.” “Big people only are called that because they usually make a bigger mess.” “You do have a point there.” They started back to the house, “Sammy, Clarence asked me if I was going on the camp out. I’m not sure what all it entails?”

“We plan on a bunch of us riding on a long trail ride out to the far end of Olson’s pasture. We’ll have tents set up there and a big campfire. We’ll eat there, sleep over, and ride back the next day. I don’t know what all they have planned to do that day. Play games and goof off. The boys from the Caymans are all excited about being real cowboys and sleeping under the prairie skies! Guess they haven’t had much experience with prairie winds! It will be fun.” “I probably won’t go along. I don’t know what I could help with.” “Golly Leaves, we just need people to help with the kids and the horses, tents, and food. That kind of stuff.” “If that’s all, I can do that. But what fun is that stuff?” “Not much, but they can’t have any fun unless someone is taking care of the housekeeping. You’ll love it. Chatterbox Olson, Eve’s husband, will be telling his ghost stories around the campfire while we eat s’mores. He makes up some good stories! Those boys are so excited that they’ll get to meet real Indians! They’ve only read about them. Gordy wants to get it written on a tee shirt that he met a real live Indian! Can you imagine that?” “I think this place is really Oz.”

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Autumn heard Joey come down the steps and knock on her door. He opened it quietly and looked in to check on her. She waited until he was peering over her before she sprang up at him. The poor man almost ed out. “Don’t ever do that again!” He blustered, “You could kill a guy!” All she could do is laugh, which didn’t make Joey feel any better. Then she pulled herself together slightly and suggested they have a cup of coffee on the patio if he wasn’t too tired. He made a face but grumbled “I guess, since I need to monitor my heart rate anyhow.” A few minutes later, they were sitting on the back patio with Gladys at their feet. “How was your work last night?” “Good, thank you for asking. How was your day? Did you and Clarence get your fudge finished?” “Yes, but I think Clarence may never like fudge again in this lifetime.” “I overdosing on a box of chocolate-covered cherries at Christmas one year. I can hardly look at them without retching to this day.” Joey shared. “How you been doing otherwise?” “Pretty good. I think I’m finally getting past some of the anxiety about the whole thing. I talked to your mom about what happened and she was great. She said she would have skinned your father with a dull knife!” “I have no doubt,” Joey laughed. “I’m glad you talked to her. So what other positive things have you done—besides ruin a small boy’s love for chocolate?” “I got my boxes of clothes from back home and Dad included the check from the sale of my car. I can sign it over to you.” “I’d rather you open a checking with it and keep it. You can pay me later when you decide what you are going to do. Carrie, you know- my sister, your

cousin, who is married to Kevin?” She rolled her eyes, “Yes, I know who Carrie is.” “She is the branch manager of the bank here in Merton. Just take the Banana into Merton and she’ll set you up with an .” “Don’t you want your money?” “Of course, but you need to have a bit of a nest egg. Otherwise, you’ll be bugging me every time you want some nail polish.” She giggled, “Thanks. I won’t forget what you’ve done for me.” “Yes,” Joe smiled, “You will. Everyone gets amnesia when it’s payback” “I won’t.” She grimaced, “You wouldn’t let me.” “You got that right!” They visited until the sun came up and then Joey went to bed. Autumn went over to Darrell’s to help milk. It was a bright day. The dreariness from the day before seemed to have cleared out and left a sunny sky. There was a sense of anticipation for the guests and events of the weekend and everyone was upbeat. Later that morning, Autumn and Alma cleaned house and began preparing for food for the guests of the cookout, too. They’d be helping with the food since while the day of the cookout there would be more than enough, the days leading up to it and after, would require planning ahead. “Jenny and Danny always set up a boys dorm in their Quonset building and feed them there. It is kind of their thing. The boys love it and it keeps them occupied, but it makes a lot of mouths to feed.” Alma explained, “Danny’s folks will be staying there and they help out, but I try to help with the cooking. That way, it isn’t so much for one person.” The ladies were working diligently and having a nice visit while doing it. They made several trips to the garden and were also freezing green beans for the winter while putting together the casseroles. After lunch, they went back to their

projects. About two-thirty, Joey left for work and he ed the parcel delivery truck on his way out of the yard. The man came to the door and Autumn signed for the box. It was only about the size of a box that held a ream of paper but not as heavy. It was the box that Autumn’s mother had told her about from Mr. Vander Vorst. She brought it in and set it on the table. Alma smiled, “Isn’t this exciting?” Autumn stared at the box, “No. I feel a little sick about it, actually. Mr. Vander Vorst told Mom these were personal things Brad still had left at the apartment. They thought they were mementos and such that they didn’t understand, like souvenirs from events. They thought I’d like to have them.” “Maybe you’ll like having them, Autumn. You and Brad did share some good times and you might want to them.” “I guess. Let’s finish that batch of beans before we open it, okay?” Alma patted her arm, “Sure, honey. Whatever you think. No need to open it at all if you don’t want to.” The beans were packaged and put to cool before Autumn even mentioned the box again. Alma had handed her a cup of coffee and Autumn said, “Well, I suppose I might as well open that thing.” “If you truly don’t want to, then don’t.” “I don’t want to, but curiosity is getting the best of me.” She raised her eyebrows, “But look what it did to the cat!” The young woman took a knife, slit the tape, and unfolded the lid. There were packets of letters, bound in rubber bands. Some, she had written to him. Some, she didn’t recognize and had no return address. Some didn’t even have postage on them and only said, ‘Brad.’ Autumn set them aside. There were ticket stubs from all sorts of things, many of which Autumn knew nothing about and never attended. There was a box of photos, mostly of people she did not know and a deposit book for a checking . In a small cigar box were trinkets and some of his jewelry. Again, she only recognized some of it.

Speechless, she sat down with her coffee next to the box. “It could have been a box of a stranger’s things for all I recognize. I should haul it right out to the burning barrel.” “I can do it for you, if you want.” “No. I guess this is the only way I’ll ever find out what he was up to. If I don’t look at it, I’ll hate myself and I’m afraid, if I do—I’ll hate myself.” Autumn looked at her aunt and giggled, “It’s time like this when I wished I had a cigarette!” “I didn’t know you used to smoke?” “I didn’t, but in the movies, it is times like this when the character lights up!” Autumn explained, “Of course, we have none of the background music foreboding a dreadful outcome.” She moved the letter packets to the side and went through the jewelry. There was a pin from the Honor Society and his pin from football his graduation year, as well as few things from college organizations. Then there was a non-descript money clip and a watch. The only thing that was of any great value was a man’s ring with a large emerald stone. The engraving on the back said ‘from Olivia’. Autumn looked at it and then handed it to her aunt. The lady looked it over and asked, “Do you know an Olivia?” “No,” Autumn shrugged, as she set it aside, “Maybe it was an aunt or something. I never met all of his family.” The ticket stubs offered no details but that really didn’t mean much. He could have gone with anyone. They went through the photos and sorted them. There seemed to be three different sets. One set contained photos of Camille and Jake, and they were taken around the apartment in Atlanta. Autumn recognized it because she had been there one weekend that last year. She poured more coffee for them and said, “Now that I think about it, it was strange that he never invited me to Atlanta more than that one weekend. Jake wasn’t around that weekend and of course, she there was no mention of anyone named Camille. I was so oblivious.” Another set of photos were all dated in February of this current year. In them, he

was with a very short, dark-haired girl. They were mostly posing around sightseeing places in Corpus Christi, Texas. In several of them, they were hugging or kissing, the typical couple on vacation type photos. The third set consisted of mostly family and friends from the school where he taught and seemed to include other teachers and students at school events. While looking at him in photos was upsetting, she handled it better than she thought she might. Since that went better than she had thought, Autumn took the first stack of letters. They were the ones she had written to him while he was in Atlanta while she was at Lawrence University in nurses training. She didn’t read them, but just flipped through them. Then she put them and the rest of the things back in the box and slid the last two packs of letters toward herself. She looked directly at her aunt, “Should I or shouldn’t I?” Auntie Alma shrugged, “I don’t know what to tell you.” “Oh hell, how bad can it be?” She removed the band from around the smaller packet of letters. These were the ones that had no postage or address. They were notes from Camille. Little ‘have a nice day’ type notes. Brad had considerately kept them in chronological order, so the two women soon put the pieces together. His relationship with Camille had started in late September. Considering he had moved to Atlanta right after Labor Day, he apparently wasted no time languishing in the throes of celibacy. By Christmas break, Camille was beginning to ask if he was still planning on breaking up with Autumn over Christmas when he went home. One note was quite upsetting. She had written, “That Autumn wench called tonight for you. Jake answered. Jake said that it was obvious that you hadn’t told her yet. He warned me to be careful. I told him you would never hurt me. You wouldn’t, would you?” Autumn’s tears streamed down her cheeks as she read the note aloud. Auntie Alma hugged her. “Maybe you don’t want to read now. You’ll just be upset.” Autumn nodded, “You’re right, but I’d like to know more about when she told him she was pregnant.”

The two looked through the stack and found a couple of the later ones. It was soon apparent that he had not only asked her to have the abortion, but also made the arrangements and paid for it, as well. He promised her that as soon as ‘he dumped the leech from Dannonville’ he would marry her and they could begin a family properly. “So, I was the leech from Dannonville!” Autumn’s sadness turned to anger, “That miserable reptile!” Then she pushed that stack to the middle of the table and pulled the final stack toward her. None had any return address and were all postdated from between November and February The stationery was personalized and said ‘from the desk of Olivia Jerrimans’. Apparently, she taught in Smyrna, a smaller town west of Atlanta. Their notes started out very professional and referred to a meeting they had both attended in Atlanta before Halloween. Autumn was relieved, “Maybe they were simply school friends.”

Then she took a note dated in February. It was in a Valentine’s card. She started to read it to herself. Within a couple lines, she burst into tears and ran out of the house. She took off across the pasture at gazelle speeds. She was gone before Alma even realized she was about to break and run. Alma came around the table and ran out on the porch. She cried out for Autumn but could barely see the top of her head as it disappeared over the horizon. She clanged the dinner triangle, but the young woman did not return. Alma was beside herself. Sammy and George were helping Darrell move stacks and Joey was at work. Alma didn’t know if or whom to call for help and couldn’t very well go after her herself. She called Jeannie, but neither she nor Diane answered. She was about to call Marly when it dawned on her. Autumn had made a conscious decision not to tell everyone and would probably not be happy if a massive search party was initiated. “I need to think,” she tapped the receiver on her other hand, “She spoke with Father Landers, so she’d be okay talking to him. I’ll call Sister Abigail.” She explained when Sister answered the phone at the rectory that Autumn had received some bad news and took off running across the pasture. “I don’t know what to do, Sister. None of my men are around to help me and the only other

person she has confided in is Father Landers.” “Let me see. He is at a meeting at the high school about classroom materials for the year. I’ll call over and see what he suggests.” “Thanks, but I hate to interrupt him.” “Nonsense, Alma. People are more important than textbooks. Let me do this and I’ll call you right back.”

A couple minutes later, Sister called. “I got in touch with Landers and he is on his way out to your place. Vicaro is at the meeting anyway, so there is nothing interrupted. He should be out there in a few minutes. It’ll be okay now. Don’t worry, Alma. Would you like me to come out, so you have someone to talk to?” “Thank you Abigail, but it isn’t necessary. I really appreciate your asking.”

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When Landers drove into the yard, Alma came out from the corral to meet him. She briefly told him which way Autumn went while he was taking off his jacket and throwing it into his car. “Did you call the horses up here for me?” he asked, noticing the horses around the water tank. “I whistled and they came. I put your two in the corral in case you wanted them. They are agitated because I didn’t feed them, so they don’t know what is going on. I thought you might need them. As fast as Autumn was running, she is likely ing through Minnesota by now. What do you think?” “Joey told me she can really run,” He nodded, “It would be a good idea to not try to follow her on foot.” The two went to the barn and hurriedly put the saddles on the horses. While he was doing that, Alma filled him in on what happened. He frowned disapprovingly, “I can’t understand if his parents looked through the box before they sent it, they surely had to figure it out that he was seeing someone else. Were they trying to be hurtful?” “I doubt they really looked. Maybe they didn’t figure it out. Who knows? Some folks have set ideas and ignore things that don’t fit.” Alma surmised, “I’m not trying to put them down, but it’s what I reckoned. Our girl was trying to keep it together, but finally just bolted.” “Did you read the last letter that made her run?” “No, I was shocked. It took me a time to analyze the situation. I do have it in my apron pocket, however. Would you like to have it?” “Might be a good idea. If I catch her and get her tethered down, maybe we can talk about it,” he said as he tightened the last cinch and then came over to Alma. “I’m so glad you called me. I thought she was doing better.”

Alma handed him the letter and folding it in half, he jammed it into his pocket. He climbed on Redemption and took Traveller’s reins. Then he leaned down to Alma, “I’m going to head out in mostly a straight direction that you pointed. If we’re not back when the guys get home, maybe you want to send them after us.” “I will.” Benjamin Dorian Landers, a forty-one year old Catholic priest, rode across the rolling pasture. He was keeping his eyes on the landscape looking for this young woman. He berated himself for not asking what she was wearing, all the while hoping she wore a different tee shirt from the usual beige. He prayed that he would be able to find her and that she hadn’t changed direction. The pasture was almost one and a half sections, about a thousand acres, and one woman could be difficult to find. Folks, even little kids, up in this country went out for long walks alone in the large pastures frequently. They all seemed to know how to take care of themselves and knew that if they never climbed through a fence, they wouldn’t become too lost. However, Autumn was frantic. She had been trying to keep a lid on her pressure cooker for a long time. Now, it blew and she was frightened and angry, usually a bad combination. He gave a thank you prayer for Alma who not only called him, but brought the horses up and thought ahead to give him some water and a flashlight. As for himself, he had no plan. When Sister Abigail had called him to the phone, his only thought was to get to Autumn as soon as possible. He had always been the calm and practical one. This time, he was not. He didn’t really understand why he was so worried about her. He had ridden about a mile. It was away from any sight of humanity; not an electrical line, fence line, or building in sight. Just pasture grasses and the blue sky with a few fluffy white clouds above. He came over a small rise and something caught his eye. There was something vibrant peach color on the ground near some taller weeds. When he got closer, he realized it was Autumn. She was lying on the ground, weeping. He approached her, got off Redemption, and began to walk toward her. As soon as she realized he was there, she jumped up, startling him and the horses. She was enraged and began hysterically berating him, flailing her arms, and screaming. “Just get the hell out of here and take your religious platitudes with!”

He told her, calmly, “Let it all out, Autumn. Just scream your head off! It will do you good to get it out!” With that, she unleashed a flume of venom from her ruptured soul. She cursed, cried, and shrieked. She berated him for interfering and then lashed out at him. Unprepared for that, he stepped back bumping into Redemption. The horse jerked up its head wildly and pulled the reins from Lander’s hand. Redemption jolted into Traveller, who was very skittish at this entire scenario. Landers grabbed for the reins and lunged forward as he grabbed for them, causing Redemption to thrust into Traveller. At that moment, Autumn was waving both her arms and howling ear-piercing curses, coming toward them. Traveller backed up and let go with a scream of terror usually saved for horses caught in a barn fire. The mare took off with Redemption right behind her, high tailing it over the small rise. They were not wasting any time getting out of there. Brave stallions were great in picture books, but when faced with a crazed human being, the truly wise ones ran for their lives. Landers was dumbfounded and immobilized as he watched the two horses disappear over a slight rise. Traveller’s scream had even penetrated Autumn’s fit and she was now standing there frozen, with her hands over her mouth watching the horses flee. The two stood in silence for a minute or so, when Landers put his hands on his head and said quietly, “I never figured that would happen.” Autumn looked at him in wonder, squawking, “Now what?” He watched the empty prairie for a full minute before he said quietly, “I guess we walk.” She watched him as a small grin slowly grew across his face. Then he chuckled and before long, he was in a full laugh. He was laughing so hard, he could barely stand straight. Every time he started to gather his wits, he burst out laughing again. “Remind me to never suggest anyone to let it all out again!” Unmoving, Autumn watched her hero lose grips with reality and then finally began to see the humor in it herself. Before long, they were both laughing like a pair of fools at their situation. As they finally settled down, she apologized, “It was my fault. I had no business screaming like a maniac.” “Don’t tell me, tell Traveller! That is, if she ever slows down enough to catch

her.” Landers chuckled, “I was the one who told you to let loose!” “Do you think she would come if I whistled for her?” He looked at her in total amazement, “Now what do you think? She hardly knows you and you just scared her half to death. Do you think she will just trot back when you whistle?” She grimaced and shrugged, “Unlikely.” Then she started to cry and he went over to her. She wept into his shoulder, “I made such a big scene. I’m so sorry.” The man consoled her as she wept, “Your aunt called and said that you had sprinted off. I came right out. When you can, I think we should talk about it.” “Poor Auntie Alma. She’ll send me packing.” “I doubt it, but I do hope that you set a smaller perimeter for these mad dashes. Have you always run off like this?” “Only when I was a kid and thought I had earned a spanking. Before long, I discovered that I could outrun Mother, but when Dad got home and found me, it was even worse.” “I don’t suppose running was appreciated.” He stood there holding her in his arms in the middle of an empty prairie and shook his head, “I doubt that running away from facing things today will solve anything either.” “I know. Honestly, I start to run before I realize not to.” “You might want to talk to Dr. Samuels about that.” “Ben, I doubt these folks will want to keep me around after today.” “What on earth makes you say that?” “Well, I’m a lunatic.” “From what Alma said, it was the box got you upset.”

“She told you?” Autumn started to cough, “My throat is sore from yelling so much. You wouldn’t happen to have some water, do you?” Landers laughed again, “I would offer you some but the jug was hanging on Redemption’s saddle. What do you say that we sit down and rest a minute before we head back to the farm?” She nodded and sat down. He sat next to her and then pulled the paper from his pocket. “Your aunt said you were reading this when you bolted. Can we talk about it, or do you want to save it for Samuels?” “I can’t exactly what set me off but it was from Olivia, talking about their wedding plans in Corpus Christi.” “Olivia?” Ben furrowed his brow, “Don’t you mean Camille?” “No, I mean Olivia. Apparently, he met her in Atlanta and was involved with her, too. There were photos in the box from Corpus Christi. I thought they looked like vacation photos, but I guess they were from their honeymoon.” She studied Landers face, “How could he do that? How did he plan for me never to know?” Landers shrugged, “Beats me. Mind if I read it?” “Go ahead.” He read the letter mailed before Valentine’s Day. It told about how excited this Olivia was that in a few days they would be man and wife. She also told how she had sent the deposits for their honeymoon and the fishing trip off the coast later that week. Then she spoke of looking for a place where they would live after their present school were completed. Landers never said anything, but folded the letter again and put it back in his pocket. Then he put his arm over Autumn’s shoulder. “There is nothing in there that you need to feel is your fault. Obviously, he was a two-timer.” “Three-timer,” she grumped. “How could I be such an idiot?” “Look, he wasn’t living in the same town you were. You weren’t together all the time. I know of cases where men were living at home with their wives and they

still messed around. It can be done, if a person has a mind to do it. If you have to hire someone to be on full-time surveillance of your mate, you might as well get out of the relationship. It isn’t worth the headache.” “Is that why you became a priest? So you needn’t deal with a wife?” “No. That’s not why.” Landers smiled, “I honestly became a priest because I felt called to help do the Lord’s work on earth. I have received God’s grace, myself. I knew what it meant to me and I wanted to share that with others. I know there is a part of me that is unfulfilled. I have to say though, when I see things like this, I have been thankful more than once to never have been involved with someone.” Autumn gazed of in the distance, “Really? It can be wonderful, you know. Feeling that someone is there to share your dreams, understand you, and help you when you are down. Someone you can rely on.” Then her tone became bitter, “Until you find out they were lying between their reptilian teeth.” “I know.” She bumped his shoulder with hers, “You are a pretty good guy. Any woman with a brain would be fortunate to have you in her life.” “Thank you, Autumn. Any guy with a working brain would consider himself fortunate to have you in his. Please don’t let Brad paint it sour for all men.” “You just said that you’re glad you never became involved with someone!” “I didn’t say that. I said when I hear about the bad things, I think I’m glad. But when I hear about morning sickness, I’m glad I don’t get pregnant!” She giggled for the first time, “I think you’d make a good mom.” “Watch it, Lady!” Landers said, “Well, if you’re just going to turn the conversation to being about me instead of you, we might as well head back.” “Don’t you want to talk to me?” “I like talking to you, but I wouldn’t have dashed out of a meeting to do it.” “I’m sorry. That was so selfish of me.”

“Ah, when the little tykes show up for school and have no books to study from, I’ll tell them that it’s because you wanted to visit. I’m sure they will understand!” he winked. “You know, what I said before? Erase it. You’d be a lousy mom.” He became serious, “What can I do to help, Autumn? Is there anything that I can do to help ease your pain and put this all in ancient history?” “I don’t know. I guess I need to understand what all really happened and then I can put it away. He apparently married Olivia, but their letters stopped by the end of March. All that while, he was seeing Camille and me. I do that he had to beg off coming home for the big St. Patrick’s day dance. He said a friend from work had died, so he thought he should stay and help out with the family. I thought it was wonderful of him to put off his own pleasure to help someone else.” She shook her head, “Oh, and about forgiveness? Forget it. God would have to be forgiving me every second I was awake to keep up. I won’t even bother to ask Him anymore. I’m pretty certain He’s taken His phone off the hook! I hate Brad, and his insufferable family, I hate church, and all their pie in the sky baloney, and I hate all those—” “Autumn, why don’t you tell me what you like? The list might be shorter.” “Well, not much, you know. I love Aunt Alma, Uncle George, Sammy, Joey, and Clarence. I really love him. And I love you. I used to love Traveller, but I don’t think that she returns that sentiment!” “Let’s work on that then. I think Traveller will be your friend again, if we can ever slow her down long enough for you to rebuild her trust. You two have a lot in common, you know. Running when things get sticky.” “Things got more than sticky, Benjamin Landers! My whole life changed!” “How was that again?” “What do you mean? You know! He was married and neglected to even mention it to me!” “Oh. Does that mean that things are different now?”

“Well of course!” “How?” She growled, “ when I put you in my list of good stuff? I think I might take you off!” “Guess that’s your choice.” Landers shrugged, “I kind of liked being on the good list though.” They sat in stony silence for some time as she thought. She rolled her eyes, “Okay. So, nothing really changed. The sun still comes up, blah blah. You’ve been hanging around that church too long. You need to see what it is like in the real world. Sometimes, stuff really hurts and messes up everything else.” “True, but you need to realize that everything that happens is not a life changer. You had already learned he was unfaithful. That hasn’t changed. He is still dead and his parents still believe that he was a saint. Whether or not he was married doesn’t change your status at all. You never married him. You’re still sitting in a North Dakota pasture with me. The horses are gone, he is gone, and doesn’t even get to enjoy all the pain he is causing you.” “I guess, but I’m still going to hell because I hate him! I just know it.” The priest asked her pointedly, “Do you believe God knows everything, including things we don’t know?” “I sure as hell hope somebody does! This is all unmitigated bull. I want to know why I have to go to hell for what he did?” “You don’t have to, you silly rabbit. He isn’t doing anything. You’re the one who is so filled with anger and revenge. Do you believe that God thought you’d like what Brad did? I doubt that very much. Does He know you’re very upset? Yes ma’am. Do you think that He’s so unloving that He would punish you for that?” “I suppose not, but still. I do want revenge.” “What are you going to do? Dig Brad up and sock him? I can’t see where there is anything that you can do. You may be able to hurt others, who will be underserving victims. That’s all. There are things you have control over and can

do.” “What’s that?” “You can have a good life. You can put his shenanigans behind you and build a happy life of your own, based on love, trust, and forgiveness. You can use the lessons that he taught you, so you don’t make similar mistakes. It can be the life you build, not dampened by Brad in anyway. And then most of all, you have the power not to hand over the rest of your life to Brad to be destroyed; because right now, that is what you’re doing.” “How can I just walk away from all that?” “You can’t. You need to think what you can do something about or if you should do anything. And then- get rid of the drag it has on your life. Have you any idea of what you think you need to do?” “I feel like if I just knew if he really got married, it’d help. Does she even know he is gone? Why didn’t she come to the funeral? He wasn’t an idiot, so he had to know that he’d get caught being married to two women at once. Unless, he didn’t plan on marrying me, but he was cutting it down to the wire. I mean the wedding was a couple days away.” “Had you got the marriage licenses yet?” “We were going to do the next day.” “Of course, people have lied before on those things.” Then he looked at her, “How do you think you can find out if he was married or not?” “I don’t know. I feel I should look into that. Maybe go down there? Maybe I should take the Banana and drive down there? When I do, I need to talk to my parents about it. I know Mother will have a fit, but I almost have to. I need to find out if he has a wife somewhere.” “No way. Very bad idea! You—alone—driving into an emotionally wrought situation? We’d never find even bits of you. I know how fast you travel on foot. I can about imagine what you’d do in the Banana Cutlass!” “I can’t expect anyone to go with me.”

“I’ll tell you what. What day is your appointment with Samuels? I’d like you to talk to him and we’ll talk it over with your family here. Then we’ll figure something out. Okay? I think we need to talk to the boys anyway, so they can help you go through that box. Maybe by carefully going through it all, you can find some of your answers. Sound reasonable?” “I suppose so.” “I promise someone will go with you if you decide to go down South. I’m sure one of your cousins would watch over you. I do want some things from you, however.” “Oh brother,” she grumped, “Here we go.” He chuckled, “I want you to have a talk with God and just tell Him that you are very unhappy with this mess, but that you’re trying to handle it. Ask for strength and if He will cut you some slack while you are doing it. Okay? I know He will. Then you might want to thank Him for it in advance. Just so you know, God doesn’t have a phone to take off the hook. He has a PA system that is always on. So, when you start ranting and raving, He hears it. Don’t ever kid yourself on that.” Autumn groaned, “You are pathetic, you know.” “Yah, I do,” he grinned. “You’re pretty good in that department, yourself! In fact, I think you’re giving me a run for top prize. Speaking of which, how is the Clarence partnership coming?” “Good. He is such a sweetheart. We just have to make the fillings and then do the whipped cream and garnish Saturday morning. How is the turkey coming? I hope you aren’t making twenty turkeys!” “No,” Landers answered, “Only three. They are thawing now and then go into the marinade tomorrow night. I hope you don’t plan on running off before the cookout. Clarence would be devastated. I would be, too.” “Why would you?” “I want you to taste the marinated turkey. I think you’ll like it. I can’t wait for your opinion.”

“Okay. I’ll give you my opinion.” Then she studied him, “I probably won’t tell you any bad stuff though.” “That wouldn’t be an opinion. It’d be a compliment. I want your opinion.” “You make everything so hard.” “It’s a drag, but then, that’s me!” He started to stand, “What do you say we head back to the house? I think we need to talk to Jessups.” “Even Uncle George?” “Yes ma’am. , this mess is all someone else’s actions. Not yours. There is nothing you need to cover up, is there? Maybe there is a map in the box to where your treasure is buried!” “No such luck. At least, no treasure that I ever heard of.” He extended his hand and helped her up. They brushed off the dried grass and he reached over to dust the dirt off her face. “You had a mud trail of tears,” he explained and they were caught in each other’s glance. “I bet you think I’m useless,” she said softly. “No. I don’t.” He looked away, nervously, “Let’s get going. Okay?”

27-

They began to walk over toward the house, not talking at all. When they came over the second rise, they saw the horses. Autumn started to say something and he put his finger to his lips to stop her. He whispered, “You sit, very quietly. I will try to approach them” She took a breath to argue, but he shook his head no. She sat down as he walked toward the horses, calmly. He started talking in a soothing tone and both horses looked up at him with rapt attention. He went over to Redemption, who was more familiar with him. The horse was apprehensive, but did let him approach. He patted his neck and then started talking in a regular voice. Redemption soon relaxed and the priest slowly got into the saddle. Traveller wasn’t secure with this arrangement, but did not move away. After a few minutes, Landers moved Redemption closer to Traveller and was able to reach her reins. Landers got a secure grasp of them and then leaned ahead to rub Traveller’s neck. He stayed there with them for a few minutes, before he motioned for Autumn to come them. He dismounted but held securely to the reins of both horses. As Autumn came closer, both horses became nervous again. Landers continued to talk to them in a reassuring tone and then asked Autumn to do the same. She approached and was soon petting both horses and talking to them quietly. Once they were relaxed, Landers suggested she saddle up. “See, I told you it wasn’t insurmountable? Was it?” “I should give you a punch for that ‘I told you so’, but I won’t do it because of the horses. Just consider yourself decked!” She said in the sweetest, gentlest tone imaginable as to not bother the horses. He teased, “Will I bruise?” “You will if you keep it up.” They set off over the pasture to the old farmhouse. The horses became calm in just a short time, but were still very tentative about their riders. They didn’t rush going home but just walked. After the horses were settled, Autumn said, “I can’t

thank you enough.” “I haven’t done anything.” “Yes, you did.” she smiled at him, “You did a lot and you know you did.” “That’s my job.” “No, it isn’t. I’m not even Catholic.” “Details, my dear. Simply details. Do you think that any of these folks wouldn’t help me out if I needed it?” “I don’t know them all, so I don’t know. Maybe I wouldn’t, depending on what mood I was in.” “I meant besides you. You just decked me, ?” “I have to ask you something. Do you really believe everything the Catholics preach?” Autumn asked. “Most of it. Do you believe everything your church taught?” “No. I’ve found out lately that I believe a lot less of it than I thought I did. That’s not good, is it?” “God gave us a brain. He expects us to think. It would be silly to believe everything without question.” “You mean like I did with Brad?” “I suppose, or just everything at all.” Landers watched this young woman riding beside him, “Autumn, can I confide in you?” “You mean never to be revealed even under torture kind of thing?” “I never thought it would go that far, but something like that.” She held out her hand to him and they shook, each on their own horse, “You have my word.”

“Sometimes, when things are tough for us earthlings, I honestly wonder if God has any real idea how hard it is to keep faith. We’re supposed to believe He does, but sometimes, I do wonder.” Autumn gulped, knowing it was something that he likely had never shared with anyone else. She respected that and answered seriously, “Ben, I think He does. Maybe that is why He said it is better to be like a little child. They don’t get into the contorted misery that grownups are so good at. I imagine Him opening a jug of moonshine when he sees some of the things we get ourselves into, and knows how miserable we’ll be digging our way back out.” Ben agreed, “I think He wants us to be here for each other. He knows we aren’t going to handle things very well. Most of these messes aren’t something a person can sort out alone. You know, He isn’t here in person, but I think He sends people into our lives to be here in His place.” “Like your Sister Agnes?” Father Landers was surprised, “You ed her name!” “Of course,” Autumn nodded, “She is like my best friend’s mom. Why wouldn’t I? You’ve been here for me and I hope that if you ever need me, I’ll be able to help you. I know you think I’m a dingbat, but I do think once in a while.” “I know you do. Thank you, Autumn. That means a lot to me.” “As far as faith, I have a lot more of it when I don’t have to think about it.” He laughed, “Me, too!”

They arrived back in the farmyard just as Sammy was heading toward the corral. He stopped and waved at them, “I heard you were on a scavenger hunt!” Landers waved back, “Yes. Look what I found?” “It was supposed to be a damsel in distress, not a girl in a damned dress!” “I’m not wearing a dress,” Autumn snorted.

“Oh now Leafy Spurge, just settle down.” Sammy laughed as he opened the corral for them to ride in. “Did you have a nice run?” She dismounted and glared at her cousin, “Cute, Samuel. Real cute.” “I’m sorry,” Sam apologized, “Mom told me what happened. That is really the pits. You know, it was a tragic end, but for what it’s worth, I’m really glad that you didn’t marry that jackass. It sounds like I’d have ended up putting on my steel-toed shoes to have a talk with that boy.” Landers came over beside where they were standing, “I think you might be right about that, but I don’t think Autumn necessarily sees the good of it now.” “I kind of do, but I just hate the whole doggone thing. I can make you both a promise. I’m never getting married or trusting a man as long as I live! Ever! You can count on that. I mean, except you guys.” “Hopefully, you’ll want to exercise the woman’s right to change her mind before long.” Sammy grinned, “Hey Landers, Mom talked to Sister Abigail, so you can have dinner with us. Mom said she’ll have it on the table by the time you get the horses and their gear put away.” “I can’t eat here all the time,” Landers objected. “Landers,” Sam chuckled, “You might want to reconsider that. I think that Sister Abigail said they were going to go ahead and eat without you, so you missed out there.” Over dinner, they discussed the situation. Uncle George issued the order that he was never to be left out of the loop ever again. Then he volunteered to go through the box and read everything in there. “I’m no help doing chores and the ladies are busy with their cooking, so it’ll give me something worthwhile to do. I love a good mystery and this way, I can read it instead of the girl. Then maybe we won’t have to buy a retractable leash for Autumn.” He declared, “After the appointment with Dr. Samuels, we’ll come to a conclusion about if or what needs to be done. If going down there is the thing, then we’ll see to it that my girl gets there, but not alone! I may not know much, but I do know that. It would make as much sense as sending a jackrabbit to herd antelope.” “Uncle George!” Autumn huffed, “That’s not very nice.”

“Might not be, but I don’t get paid for being nice.”

The next morning it was windy and the sky was dreary. Uncle George finished his breakfast and set up his project in the corner of the living room at the desk. He sorted the contents of the box and then logged everything in a notebook and calendar. The man was taking this work seriously. Autumn was hovering around his every move until he banished her. “You have things that I expect you to be doing while I ponder on this. Hear?” “But..” “No buts about it. Why don’t you call Clarence and make your pudding or whatever? I want to see you enjoying your day.” “Yes, Uncle George. I will.” She said quietly, “If you have any questions, you can ask me.” “I know. Now, call Clarence.”

She went over to get Clarence from Darrell’s place and they spent the day making chocolate pudding for the twenty pies. It was easier than the other parts of the pie, but by the time they finished, they were getting plenty tired of that, too. Clarence sat down at the lunch table, “You know if I was a restaurant guy, I’d probably quit eating. Most stuff is pretty good until you make a ton of it.” Alma patted his head, “I know the feeling. But one day you wake up and have a craving for chocolate pudding and find yourself out in the kitchen!” He watched her while she talked and considered what she said, “That might be, if I live a long, long time. I might be hungry for chocolate pudding when I’m really old, like maybe thirty.”

Over those two days, things were busy. Father Landers called out every day to check in with Autumn and see how she was doing. The first day, she was still

shaky, but by Friday, she was on much firmer ground. “I’m doing well. Uncle George is working through that box like a scientist, but he is not releasing any information until after the cookout.” Landers laughed, “Don’t tell me he’s like Vicaro and his super-sleuth friend Kincaid! This country will never be short of spies! What are you up to?” “Auntie Alma and I have been making sloppy joe filling for Dan and Jen’s boys who are staying up at the Quonset. I can’t believe that these people do all this stuff! My goodness, they must have a dozen boys who will be sleeping there!” “The boys love it. Whenever the clan has a big gathering, they do that. The girls usually sleepover at Byron and Marly’s place, but because of his surgery, they moved over to Larsons.” He chuckled, “That’s what I love about these folks.” “I imagine it is rather quiet at your place.” “No. We have guests. Reverend Carson and Father Colter from Boston are staying with us, while Father Sebastian from Maine is staying with Father Christoff at St. George’s rectory. Sebastian and Christoff are partners in the cook-off. Colter and Carson are partners, too.” Autumn asked, “Is everyone insane?” “Pretty much, I’d say so. Has your company arrived yet?” “No, not until tonight. Auntie Alma and I have the house all cleaned up, so we’re ready. I’m worried about so much company. I’m not very fond of big crowds.” “Autumn, a big crowd is just a whole bunch of ‘one persons’. No big deal.” “I can’t imagine what it must be like to have a brain like yours.” “Some days, it is very exciting!” He laughed, “You sound snippy, more like your old self. I’m glad. Sleeping well?” “Yes, and you?” “Very well, thank you. I know you were being sarcastic, but that’s okay. Then I know you are getting back to normal. Well, I better get moving. I have work to

do. Have a nice day, Autumn.” “You too, Ben.” When she let it slip, she hesitated. He had a caught it also, and while she had inadvertently used his name before, he had never commented. Today, he said, “I like it when you call me by my given name.” “Is it breaking some rule?” “Not at all. Folks call Bart by his name all the time, unless they are calling him Slick. It is rare anyone ever called me by mine since I was an adult.” “That day in the pasture, I called you a lot of things.” Autumn giggled. “I . Anyway, I’m going to be late. Have a nice day.”

That afternoon, Joey and Sammy got all spiffed up and headed to town to pick up their sweethearts, Beth and Bonnie. Autumn was quite nervous about meeting their fiancées, but Uncle George assured her that she didn’t have to be. “I figure it this way, if those two fabulous women could fall for those two jugheads, they must not be too highfalutin’.” Autumn hugged her uncle, “You say the nicest things! What are they like?” Auntie Alma poured the coffee and motioned George and Autumn over to the table, “They are Father Bart’s sisters. Bart was the middle of seven children. The others were all girls. The oldest is married. I believe her name is Blanche.” “Hold your hat, Autumn,” Uncle George chuckled, “Old Alma here will be giving you their shoe size in a minute!” Alma glared at her husband of many years, “You are rapidly slipping from my good graces!” “Ah now, Ma,” George teased. “At any rate,” the lady continued, “Then is Brenda. Next is Beverly, I think.

Then is our dear Bart. Father Slick.” “Why does he get called that?” Autumn asked. “You’ll have to ask Darrell. He started it. I guess Darrell thought he looked funny in his new cowboy hat or something.” “The other priests are called by Father and then their last name. Why is he Father Bart?” Uncle George cracked up, “I know! He doesn’t want to be Father Fedder!” Autumn giggled, “Makes sense.” Alma continued, “Next is Bea, who is a ballerina with the Metropolitan Ballet in New York. She is engaged to Diane Harrington’s brother, Randy Berg.” Alma smiled, “Back to the Fedder family, next is Sammy’s Bonnie. She attended MIT and is an electrical engineer. She will be working at one of the power stations here when they get married. She is about five-foot, seven and has blonde hair and blue eyes. She is very nice looking. Lastly, is Joey’s Beth. She is shorter, her hair is dark blonde and she has hazel eyes. She is very pretty, in a petite kind of way. At any rate, Beth just finished with the University of Connecticut and works with earth, atmospheric and planetary sciences.” “What is she going to do with that out here?” Autumn gasped. “She has a job already with the weather bureau. You’ll like them both. Beth is the most fun, but Bonnie is more serious. They both have good hearts.” “Wow, and them there is me. Just nothing.” “I won’t stand for that,” Uncle George snapped. “I can’t tell if you are bragging or complaining. You’re a ed nurse and a good person. What the heck more do you think you need to be?” “I’m sorry. I just meant that they are getting married and I’m not.” “They’re both older than you, by a few years. Just settle down, girl,” Uncle George said, “I’ll tell you when you are an old maid. Okay?”

“I love you, Uncle George,” Autumn gave him a smile. “Well, there’s your problem. It is great you love me, but you need to be finding some younger dude. Wait until the cookout. You will meet a lot of guys.” “They all have somebody.” “I’ll dig someone up for you. Just tell me when you’re ready. I thought you wanted to get this fiasco sorted out first.” “I do. I guess I was whining.” “What was your first clue?” A bit later, the boys turned into the drive with their precious cargo. Autumn had changed clothes, curled her hair, and put on some makeup. Even though Uncle George had a good point about the girls, she did want to make a good impression. Autumn felt comfortable around them almost right away. They were pleasant, open, and seemed very eager to be her friend. They no more than had their things put in the guest rooms, when Bart called to say he was coming out. Then Jenny called and asked if someone would be bringing up the Sloppy Joe filling that evening for the following day. Alma said she would send someone after dinner. Dinner was nice and everyone was jovial. There was a lot of teasing about the cookout and all the plans for the following day. “I thought it was on a Sunday last year?” Beth asked. “It was, but it got too hectic with the cooking. So, this year we moved it up a day,” Joey explained. Bart groaned, “Yes, except for confession. We’ll change off for them. I hope most folks will be kind enough to keep their sinning to a minimum, so we can speed right through them!” “Bart!” Bonnie frowned, “Just what kind of priest are you anyway?” “One with places to go and things to do!” the young priest laughed. “I suppose

you’ll need to start taping your confession now. Then whoever listens to it, can do it while they are cooking over a hot grill!” Bonnie squinted at her brother, “Even after all those years of training, you are still a schnook!” “Isn’t that a Yiddish word?” Bart teased.

After dinner, Alma got the Sloppy Joe filling out and then asked who was going to take it up to Jen and Danny’s. Bart said he would, if someone would come along. Autumn volunteered if she could drive the Banana. She wanted to become familiar with directions around the area. Once they were in the car, she became nervous. Not only because she wasn’t certain which way to go, but because she didn’t know how much Landers had told Bart. She was quickly put at ease with the directions. Bart offered to draw her a map and mark certain places, so she could travel on her own in the future. That was a great idea. Bart was scribbling the map on a sheet of paper and said, “Landers tells me..” She took a sharp breath and almost ed out. He simply continued, unaware that she almost drove into the ditch, “…that you are partners with Clarence. What is it that you are making?” “Mississippi or Louisiana Mud Pie.” “Which one are you making?” “I guess it would be Dakota Mud Pie,” she giggled, mostly in relief. “I’m glad you aren’t competing against our marinated turkey. I would rather we could be friends than to start out in vicious competition.” “Folks do get peculiar about their entries,” she smiled, “I’m overwhelmed that they all get so carried away.” “You haven’t seen anything yet,” the thin Bart laughed, “Wait until you see

Halloween. Not to mention, Christmas was almost a nightmare!” “A nightmare?” “Yes, between lights and music blaring in this part of the county, the sales of sunglasses and ear muffs quadrupled! This outfit does love to have a good time.” Bart smiled at her, “There, now the big X is George and Alma’s, home base. So I tried to put in everything that my paper was big enough for. Anything beyond the edge of the paper and you’re on your own!” “Thank you, Randy Mc Nalley.” When they arrived at Jen and Danny’s place, they were invited in by Brett. He was at Dan’s house since he lived just across the driveway. The two brought in the two huge roasters of Sloppy Joe mix and asked where to put them. Jen said, “The counter will be great and we can take them down later. I would like you to meet some folks, Autumn, since I don’t know if you have met them all yet. This is my father-in-law, Eddie Schroeder, and my mother-in-law, Lucy. This is Marty, Danny’s brother and his wife, Greta. As you can see, they are going to have a new playmate for our baby Matthew soon. Everyone, this is Autumn Simms, my cousin.” They were all very friendly and the little Matthew toddler came right over to Bart, who picked him up. “What are you doing these days, Batman?” the priest asked. The little guy wagged his head and with a sigh turned his hands outward, “Cooking. So hard. Poor Batman.” “Oh my,” Bart commiserated. “That sounds tragic.” The two-year old nodded pathetically, “Streme measures.” Jen came over to him, “If you are that tired, little man, maybe you should go to bed.” “Batman no sleep,” he announced. “How about I give you your bath?” his Grandma Lucy offered, “Then maybe

you can play a little while longer?” The boy looked at his Mom and back to his Grandma, “Maybe play.” Then he toddled off with Grandma Lucy and Jen offered Bart and Autumn some coffee. They visited a bit and talked about the guests that were arriving. Eddie Schroeder said, “I know folks are beginning to sprout up all over. We were down at Kincaid’s earlier and he has a pile of folks helping him set up for tomorrow. The man is a maniac and manages to get everyone roped into is mechanizations. I was down there almost all day and he was still going strong when I came home to milk.” On the way back to Jessups, Autumn remarked how nice everyone seemed. “They’re nice people,” Bart agreed. “Shucks, I never got over to see the Quonset,” Autumn mumbled. “Are you going to take karate after things settle down? Brett and I are teachers and I think this year, Johnny Standing Elk is going to help us. Landers is signed up. He helps with the kids, but he wants to learn himself. There are a few young adults who want to and I think you’d like it.” “Oh, I don’t know yet what I’m going to do. I think I should be finding a job before too long.” “I heard you are a RN? They are looking for two ed nurses at the Retirement Home. If you apply right away, you might get the better shift. One is for nights and I think that might cut into your social life.” “I don’t have one of those.” “You may, later. But, check it out. The catch is, the work doesn’t start until the fall. Mrs. Benz is retiring in mid-September and Mrs. Schmidt is expecting her baby around the first of October. That might work out just right for you.” “Thank you, Father Bart,” Autumn nodded, “I’ll look into that.”

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The next morning, Cook-Off Day, started even earlier than other days. By quarter after five, the women were pulling into Jen and Dan’s yard. Thankfully, Lucy met them with steaming mugs of coffee and they went over to the Quonset. The younger boys were just getting their sleeping bags rolled up and put away. They had rolled them out on the workout mats in the large dojo, karate gym. On one side, Dan and Eddie had set up a few folding tables with the cooking line on it. In front of that was the the buffet line. There were a few picnic tables set for the boys and men who had come to help. There were almost two dozen young boys there, varying in ages from four to eighteen. The older boys slept there so the younger kids wouldn’t freak out or get into a hassle of any kind. It all seemed to be very well under control. Autumn was stationed at a grill, with a spatula and a stack of sausage patties. She began frying them, as Beth started on the eggs Bonnie was dishing up cantaloupe and melon for the boys. Lucy and Alma were flipping pancakes as fast as they could, while Jen made sure there was a plentiful supply of butter, syrup, and jellies. Eddie, Dan and Brett helped the boys pour their milk and juice, and got them seated. By six-thirty, the buffet was taken down and the men carried the dirty dishes to the house. The ladies washed them up, while Eddie and Danny took the boys outside for a game of volleyball. When they were finished, Alma suggested that Autumn get Clarence so they could get home. Autumn came over to where the boys were playing volleyball, wondering if the poor kid would want to leave the fun. To her surprise, he ran over to meet her. “I’m ready, Miss Leaves. I played the first game so that I would be done in time.” “Are you sure you want to leave all the fun?” “It is cool, because we made a deal. Besides, we have fun. I was thinking, next year we should find a movie in the afternoon. Then we can play games in the morning, huh?”

“We’ll have to check the schedule,” Autumn smiled. “You know, it is more important for you to have fun.” “Oh, not really,” the nine-year old said, “It is more important to live up to your promises. Then you can have fun and not feel bad about it. Mister says that is why a guy has to think about what he promises, so you don’t get in a jam. Do you think that is right?” “I do.” Then she stopped walking and gave him a quick hug, “You are the best partner in the world.” “Thanks, but I don’t think so. , I burnt the caramel.” “That was both of our faults, I had the heat turned up too high.”

Joey and Sammy drafted their girls to help them take their Cowboy Briskets over to the Petunia Patch, so they could bury them in the cooking pits. Clarence and Autumn got busy with their whipped cream. When the pies were topped with the dark chocolate shreds, they were ready for the competition. Uncle George and Auntie Alma helped the two put the pies in the several coolers they had fixed up for them. Each cooler was fixed so it had a rack in it and they could get two stacks of two in each cooler. There were still six coolers. By the time they had them loaded in the Banana and Uncle George’s car, they all four decided that they would go to a movie the next year. The parking in Kincaid’s yard was something else. There were many cars with their trunks open, all trying to get close to his huge Quonset or the line of grills and pits outside. Joey and Sammy came over right away to help them carry the coolers into the Quonset. Rain, Brett’s girlfriend and Kincaid’s granddaughter, was by the side door as the director. She had the list of where everyone should display their entries on the tables around the outside walls of the building. There was barely enough room under the table for all their coolers, but they arranged them so that they could easily reach both the nut variety and the plain. When tablecloths were placed over the half sheet of plywood on sawhorses, it looked like a nice table. Then in the middle, their recipe was posted next to a stack of recipe cards it was written on. Then there was a stack of small paper plates and some plastic forks. Of

course, there was the decorated shoebox, the ballots, and pencils. The ballots were simple and easy. Directions were to check one box- either Good, Great, or Fantastic. After they set up their table, Autumn and Clarence went to check out the rest of the buffet. They took the list that Rain had handed them and walked from one set up to another.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ENTRIES Chili: Green Chicken Chili Ken Ellison/Becky Oxenfelter Lunkhead Chili Lunkheads Jungle Chili Neil Hamilton/Kathleen Finch Chowders and Soups: Wild Rice Soup Greta and Marty Schroeder Wisconsin Beer Cheese Soup Keith and Darlene Schroeder Minestrone Giovanni Capriotti Salads: Watergate Salad Jenny Schroeder Cauliflower-Bacon Salad Elsie Oxenfelter/Lucy Schroeder Italian Tossed Salad Giovanni Capriotti Greek Salad Savannah Graf Potatoes, Rice and Noodles: Au Gratin Potatoes Kid Effan/Alex Bernard Authentic Fettuccine Giovanni Capriotti Parsley Babies Eve Olson Sandwiches: Pulled Pork Sandwiches Kathleen Finch/Jeff Wilson Monte Cristo Sandwiches Doris Olson/Cal Bernard Mexican Turkey Burgers Josh Perkins/ Joallyn Frandsen Fruit and Vegetables: Broccoli Casserole Megan Elizabeth Schroeder Grilled Fruits Eve Olson/Pepper Holloway Green Tomato Stew Carrie Schroeder Apple Chips Mo Kincaid and the Gophers Snacks and Dips: Homemade Potato Chips Darrell and Jeannie Jessup Homemade Tortilla Chips Beverly Larson/Savannah Graf Sour Cream Bacon Dip Andy Schroeder Cheddar Cheese Dip Gary Larson

Native Specialties: Wild Berry Pemmican Honey Pemmican Wasna, honey Wasna, sweet tallow Bear Tracks Bear Claws Breads, Rolls and Quick Breads: Italian Bread Zucchini Bread Native Fry Bread Pit Meals: Baked Stuffed Salmon Marinated Turkey Cowboy Brisket Poultry: Honey Mustard Chicken Chicken Parmesan Huli Huli Chicken Fish and Shellfish: Grilled Lobster Dover Sole Walleyed Pike Beef: Rotisserie Prime Rib Osso Bucco (Veal Shanks) T-Bone Steaks Filet Mignon Pork: Mustard Baby Back Ribs Marinated Pork Loin Grilled Pork Chops Rotisserie Pork Shoulder Apple and Sage Pork Cakes: Banana Chiffon Cake

Johnny Standing Elk/CJ Grey Ha Jackson Fielding/Charlie Ellison Jackson Fielding/Charlie Ellison Johnny Standing Elk/CJ Grey Ha Kate Ellison/Jackson Fielding Bear and Mabel Fielding

Giovanni Capriotti Marly Ellison Mabel Fielding/Annie Schroeder Carl Kincaid/Father Vicaro Fathers Landers and Bart Sammy and Joey Jessup

Chatterbox Olson/Ian Harrington Giovanni Capriotti Jeannie and Darrell Jessup

Father Colter/Reverend Carson Father Bart/Keith Schroeder Darrell Jessup/Chatterbox Olson Fathers Sebastian/Christoff Giovanni Capriotti Josh Perkins/ Matt Harrington Jeff Wilson/Carl Kincaid

BrettSchauer/RainHarrington/Ba Eddie and Marty Schroeder Keith and Kevin Schroeder Doug and Little Bill Anderson Kid Effan and Josh Perkins Savannah Graf/Evelyn Forrest

Black Forest Cake Greta Schroeder/Gilda Heinrich Pineapple Upside-Down Cake Kathleen Finch/Beverly Larson Carrot Cake Lucy Schroeder/Elsie Oxenfelter Tea Cakes: Royal Tea Cakes Ginger Ellison/Iris Suzanne Lars Queens Tea Cakes MaddieLynnOlson/Clarissa Grey Desserts: Berry Dumplings Annie Schroeder Apple Fritter Joallyn Frandsen Cherry Fizz Pie Maureen Kincaid Dakota Mud Pie Autumn Simms/Clarence Grey H Cookies: Prune Nut Cookies Margie Bernard/Savannah Graf Chocolate Drop Cookies Eve/Glenda Olson Mountie Cookies Beverly Larson/Kathleen Finch ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The two were in awe of all the entries and stood there discussing it, until Andy Schroeder spied them. “Hey, looking for work? We have a million tables to set up. Want to help?” “Sure, I will.” Clarence said, “Maybe Miss Leaves has other stuff to do.” “No, I’ll help.” Before long, they were setting up tables and chairs, while others were setting up the bandstand. “Are we going to have music, too?” “Of course,” Andy smiled. “Are you a dancer?” “I do a bit, but not a lot. I doubt I’ll dance.” “I’ll dance with you, Miss Leaves,” Clarence offered. “I’m not too bad and I promise not to tromp on your feet.” “Well thank you, but what if I tromp on yours?” “I have boots on, so it won’t matter.” Then the boy moved on to get another chair and Autumn smiled at Andy. “He is the nicest kid.” “Yes, he is. He sure has taken a shine to you. That is the most outgoing he’s ever been. He is usually rather quiet and studious.” “I really like him.” “Raving about Clarence again?” Father Landers asked as he came up beside them. “Hi Andy. Do you know where we are supposed to set up?” “You would have to ask Rain. She’s over there with the lay out. This is more organized than last year.” “Some parts of it. At our place this morning, it was a nightmare. Sister Abigail was rather distressed with us. Some of the things she was threatening, I believe were downright un-nunly.”

“Is un-nunly a word?” Andy asked. “It is at our house!” Landers laughed. “Well, better set up our station. Bart buried the turkey earlier and is checking it as we speak. Did you and Clarence get set up?” “We did.” “Mr. Kincaid says that’s all the tables and chairs.” Clarence announced as he approached them. “What should I do now?” Andy offered, “If Autumn doesn’t need you anymore, I can take you up to Danny’s. They were getting lined up for the bow and arrow competition. I hear you are pretty good.” Clarence shrugged, “Not too bad, but not as good as Crazy Horse. Do you know how those guys in olden times learned to shoot bow and arrow?” “No, how?” “They used grasshoppers as targets. Boy, you’d have to be pretty quick for that.” Clarence looked to Autumn, “Do you need my help now? Or should I go?” “You go and thanks for all your help. Good luck with your bow and arrows.” “It isn’t luck. I am either good enough or not. If I’m not, I have to practice more. Right, Mr. Andy?” “Right on.” “I’d appreciate some assistance, Ma’am,” Landers grinned, “Since we’re not in direct competition, maybe you would help me.” “Of course,” Autumn went with him, “I was flabbergasted at all the entries. I had no idea what a big deal this was.” Landers chuckled, “Everything these guys do is a big deal. I guess because they want to include everyone.” “I noticed there are only three categories on the ballots: good, great or fantastic.”

“That’s so no one gets an awful! Who wants to play if they get a ‘sell your stove and eat out’ vote?” “I guess that’s true.” “It is supposed to be good-hearted fun, although to hear Kincaid and Vicaro go on about it, you would think world peace depends on it!” They found the correct table and then Autumn covered it while Landers emptied the rest of the box. “I don’t know what to do with this stuff. Sister put our recipe in a photograph thingie.” “It’s called a frame. You set it on the table so folks can see what it is supposed to be. She spoils you guys.” “Yes,” he smiled, “She really does. I don’t know what sort of quandary we would be in without her. Vicaro always says she is his right-hand man.” “How long have they been together?” “He’s been here almost forty-five years and Sister was assigned here about thirty some years ago.” “They must be very close.” “Yes, they are. They work like a well-oiled team. She’s about the only one that can snap him to, when he gets out there. He won’t listen to either Bart or I unless it’s something he wants to hear!” “I don’t understand how all that works; nuns, priests and so on.” “Some time we can talk about it. Okay?” He set the platters on the table and then they looked over their project. “What do you think? Looking good?” “I think so.” Autumn started to giggle, “But you forgot your ballot box!” “Good grief, where’s my head?” The man set the ballots, pencils, and ballot box out. “You know these judges are very trusting. They handed out the ballots to everyone with their boxes. We could have filled them all out ahead of time!”

“Benjamin Landers! You are so larcenous.” “Oh, oh. Now the cat is out of the bag!” Bart came up to them, “I’m sorry Autumn, I need to steal this character away. We have to get back to St. John’s to start confession. I hope our turkey will be okay with no one watching it.” “What does it need?” “Just to make sure that the fire doesn’t go out. We buried it under enough hot coals so it should be good, but we need to keep the fire going on the top of the pit because we didn’t get enough coals burnt down last night.” “Show me what to do, and I can do that for you.” “You sure?” “As Clarence would say, if you don’t help out, you are just a waste of space!”

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Autumn only had to add wood a couple of times to the turkey pit, before Sammy said he’d watch it while she went home with Beth and Bonnie and get cleaned up for the big event. She was hesitant to leave after she had promised them, but he assured her that Bart and Landers would be okay with it. She was quite excited as she took her shower and got ready. This was going to be something different than she had ever done before. Surprisingly, she was looking forward to it. She had visited with her cousins, Carrie, Jen, and Eve while watching the turkey pit, and was introduced to a few folks she hadn’t met before. She did feel that most of them were familiar faces now and her mind was beginning to sort out who belonged to whom. The nicest thing was that if she was mixed up, no one seemed offended if she asked. They just smiled and explained it. It was just about noon when she got back. All afternoon, she visited and watched the fire pit for Bart and Landers. She was introduced to Crandall, the pilot who owned a charter service out of the Grand Caymans. He was in his early forties and friendly but not as outgoing as most of the clanners. He was spending a lot of time with the toddler, Clancy Grey Hawk, also known as High Pockets. She was introduced to Kid’s brother-in-law, a jovial fellow who owned a chain of Italian restaurants in California, named Giovanni Capriotti. Giovanni was a big story teller and full of life. His wife, Kid’s sister, Sharon was quieter, but around Giovanni, there was not much choice. That man was entered in almost every competition. Sharon giggled, “I think he was born with an egg beater in his hand!” Then she met Johnny Standing Elk. CJ introduced them. “We are partners in the Indian stuff, because Johnny knows how to cook it. I’ll let you shake his hand, if you say you’ll vote for it!” “But what if I don’t like it?” Autumn poked. “It doesn’t matter. Just vote for us. Here is Mr. Johnny. Johnny, this here is Miss

Autumn, but you can call her Leaves. She is cousins with Mr. Darrell.” Autumn shook the hand of the nice-looking Sioux about thirty years old. “Hello. So, you are a cook?” “Not really.” The man, almost six-foot tall with broad shoulders and a great build, smiled as he held out his hand to shake hers, “I was drafted.” “Me, too. My cousins drafted me and Clarence offered to be my partner.” “He is a good kid.” “Yes, I think I might adopt him,” Autumn smiled. “You can’t,” seven-year old CJ responded quickly, “Mister and Missus already did. I think you can only get adopted one time.” “She just meant that she thinks a lot of him, CJ,” Johnny explained. “Miss Autumn, do you think a lot of me, too?” “Of course, CJ. I do.” Autumn answered quickly, making a mental note to not walk into that quagmire again. Johnny winked and said quietly, “Been there myself.” She nodded a thank-you but CJ was off on another tangent. “Mr. Johnny, I think I had better go look for Little Charlie. He said that Turk was going to be here this afternoon and we have to hang out. Is that okay?” “It’s fine, CJ. I’ll keep an eye on our entries and you go play.” CJ took off at a run and Autumn giggled, “Those two are a pair. Is Turk?” “Yes, but he lives in Boston. His parents are out to visit. His mom is one of Mo Kincaid’s daughters. I have to tell you, Autumn, I get everyone so mixed up. I’m new to this crew and don’t know my way through the minefield yet.” “We’ll make a great pair, because I sure don’t! How long have you known these folks?”

“I met Schroeders this Memorial Day when they vacationed in South Dakota. I work as a trail guide at the State Park down there and they were on my trail ride.” Johnny answered, “They invited me to their camper for dinner and have included me ever since. How long have you known them?” “I am Jessups niece from Georgia. I came up here a few weeks ago. So, I know Jessups like forever, but the rest are all new to me.” “What brings you up this way, if I’m not prying?” Johnny asked. Her face darkened and Johnny was embarrassed, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. It was not that long ago, I didn’t want to share my history with everyone. Please forgive me. Can I get you a soda pop something to make up for it?” She smiled, “A Coca Cola would be nice, but you don’t need to make up for it. I really need to get over doing that. I’ll make you a deal. If you want to share a soda with me while I watch this fire, you can tell me what you were hiding out from and I will tell you why I’m here.” He chuckled, “Then will we be blood brothers?” “Why not?” Autumn brought another lawn chair up by the fire and took a deep breath. She thought to herself, ‘Okay, Joey, Sammy, and Ben. I’ll break out of my box, but you guys better be here to pick up the pieces.’ Johnny returned with the Cokes and sat down. He looked at the fire, “Is this your entry?” “No, it is Father Landers and Bart’s. I’m just watching it for them.” “They seem like nice guys. So, have you worked on the model airplanes yet?” “No,” she looked surprised, “Mostly been busy with our pies.” “Pies? You might be my best friend! I love pie.” “Clarence and I are both pretty tired of it now. We made twenty pies.”

“I know. I may never eat pemmican or wasna again as a long as I live.” “What are those?” “Pemmican is ground up jerky with berries. It is then dried into a bar and can be kept for a long time without refrigeration. I used to like it for snacks. Wasna is a similar thing, but with dried corn kernels.” “That sounds interesting. Clarence and I made Dakota Mud Pies.” “Hm, that might not be my favorite after all.” She smiled, “They are like a chocolate cream thing.” “Okay, then I will like them. What are they called mud pies?” “Who knows? Could be some big reason or maybe none at all!” “I see.” He nodded, “So who goes first? How ‘bout I just tell you a brief history of my life and then you can have a turn?” “I guess.” “I grew up on Pine Ridge Reservation. I am full-blooded Teton Sioux. When I graduated, I ed the military. Afterwards, I came home and worked for a home-alarm company in Sturgis. There I met and married Brenda. She was a free-spirited redhead. We married and a year later, we had a baby girl. A few months after that, while I was at work, the furnace in our trailer home blew up. They were both killed, instantly. It was about my undoing. To make a longer story short, I tried to run away and hide in a bottle. However, no bottle was big enough. So, between friends, family, and my spiritual leader, I finally got back on track. Now I work at the trail ride and have a little room in a rooming house. My landlady forced me to get back into the real world. First folks I met up with were the Schroeders! And when these guys take you into their fold, you are in for the long haul.” “Wow!” Autumn nodded, “That is not so much different than me. I went to college to become a ed Nurse. I just graduated and was about to marry my long time sweetheart. A couple days before the wedding, he was killed in a car crash. My life just crumbled into shambles with all the things that went on

with that. I had a terrible time with everything and then my mother and Auntie Alma got together on the phone and next thing I know, I’m up here. I didn’t try to run away in a bottle, but I do run. Believe me, when I get cornered or panic, I take off like a deer with no thought of where I’m going. Joey and Father Landers have both brought me home a couple times. I’ve given the pasture quite a work out.” “I would suggest the Olympics, but maybe you don’t want to get cornered that often. Thanks for telling me. I believe that Ginger Ellison— do you know that little girl?” “She is my cousin Marly’s daughter.” “She says you have to know your friends stuff.” “I’ve heard that since I’ve been here. I take it you are a clanner?” “I guess so, and you?” “Something like that. I know I’m tiyospaye.” Johnny smiled, “And you speak Sioux?” “I hope I said it right. Clarence taught it to me. We call our pie— Wasicu witko!” Johnny burst out laughing, “That’s great! I love it!” “I hope it means crazy white man idea.” “It does! I bet you named it after you made so many, huh?” “Yes, as a matter of fact, we did.” Autumn nodded, “What do you do in the winter or do the trail rides go all winter?” “No, they will close early this year in fact. Usually they close in the fall, but this year there is some work that needs to be done on the campsites and roads, so they want to get that finished before the snow flies.” “What will you do then?” “I’d planned to stay in Sturgis and help out my landlady.” Johnny explained.

“However, Mrs. Littleton is leaving for Arizona early September. When she does, the house will be closed up and I’ll come up to stay with Schroeders for the winter. I’m going to work with Andy and Jackson in the engine repair shop and help Brett teach Karate.” “Oh good, then I will see you.” “Are you taking karate?” “I don’t know. Folks are trying to talk me into it, but I haven’t decided.” “I suppose with all your sprinting, you may be too tired out,” Johnny teased.

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The food was to be served at six-thirty. The men would try to get their chores done early, so that they could be on time. The priests would close confession at six, so they could make it. Autumn had to replenish the ice packets in her coolers a few times that afternoon and it was a mess. She was just trying to drain the last of the water out of one when Landers came up to her. “Need a hand?” “Yes, I should take this outside to drain it, because it is getting quite a bit of water in it.” “You grab one end and I’ll grab the other.” The two took the cooler out to a grassy area behind the Quonset and opened the drain. “Are the coolers keeping them cool enough?” Lander asked. “Seems to be. I hope your fires were okay. I left them in the care of Sammy while I went home to change clothes. He said you wouldn’t mind.” “No problem. They look good. Bart and I unwrapped the turkeys. The temp is right and they look done. One thing I can’t abide is raw poultry!” “Me, either!” “How have you been doing? Handling things okay?” “Yes. Uncle George won’t tell me anything he has read. He said when all this is over and the guests have gone back home, we’ll have a dinner meeting. You will be invited, of course, and then he’ll tell us what he knows. He said we just need to enjoy ourselves for now.” “Sounds like a good idea.” Then Landers looked right at her, “How have you really been?”

“Actually, I think you would be proud of me, no 50-yard dashes!” He patted her back, “I’m proud of you. Well, let’s get this cooler back in there before we get accused of stealing a cooler full of pie!” “You think that sounds good, but neither Clarence or I like this pie anymore.” “I know how it goes. Honestly, Bart and I are not big on turkey right now.”

It was closer to seven when everyone arrived and the food was set up. Men were carving their meat on the tables set up outside. They were the plywood/saw horse combination with cutting boards on them. They filled their platters there with much less mess than the previous year. Clarence and Autumn cut some of their pies, but only plated two. There were four others, cut and set up, but not dished up. Autumn thought they would serve more when they were finished eating. Then everyone took a place at the tables and Pastor Byron led grace for the assembly. After the Amen, Carrie took over the microphone. “I hope everyone budgets their tummy space to get a taste of each entry. The judges will be judging their categories and the prizes will be awarded after the votes are counted. Enjoy, but try not to take seconds until you get a taste of everything.” Autumn sat with Clarence and his Aunt Mabel and Uncle Bear. They were in their fifties and from Montana. Bear was so very proud of his nephew, Jackson. “He is the son I never had, and now I have all these little Grey Hawks, too! Isn’t it the nicest thing?” Autumn smiled and nodded, “I certainly am enjoying Clarence. He and I are good friends.” “We have a lot of fun together, but we don’t like pie so much anymore.” Clarence nodded, “Miss Leaves, Uncle Bear and Auntie Mabel got married when we were in South Dakota. It was way cool. The minister and the holy man both did it, so they are really, really married!” Bear started to laugh and Mabel grinned, “I guess that doesn’t give us much

wiggle room, does it?” Jackson and Katie came over to them at their table, as did Josh and Joallyn. Josh had his cousin who was his roommate with him. “Everyone, I’d like you to meet Curtis Arnold. He is my cousin who offered me a new start in Merton.” Jackson shook his hand, “I actually wondered if Josh made you up. He said that you worked out of town, but you never seem to be home. Of course, if I lived with Josh, I’d be gone too!” The man in his late twenties grinned, “He isn’t too bad, but I have to it a thousand miles of space does help!” Introductions were made around the table and then they sat down. As luck would have it, Curt sat next to Autumn. She had to it, she did notice. Curt had movie star good looks like Josh, but much fairer. Suddenly, Autumn was feeling dowdy again. Josh explained the relationship of some of the people at the table and finally Curt groaned. “Man, no more! I can’t take it. I’m so confused right now!” Autumn giggled, “I know that feeling. I wonder if these folks really know who everyone is, or if they just make it up.” He smiled at her and gave her a wink, “I think they make it up.” “So, why do you live here if your work is so far away?” Uncle Bear asked. “It was here. I work as an energy broker; a fancy word for an electric, gas, coal, and oil salesman. But now they send me all over creation.” “I didn’t know folks had much choice in who they can buy from,” Bear frowned. “Who do you sell to?” “I sell to the utility companies, so I’m on the road constantly. However, I will be around more in about a month or so. The big boys asked me if I’d like to work at this end for a while, and I thought I would. Suitcases are nice, but it does get old.” “I can imagine,” Bear nodded. “You’ll work with the power plants then?”

“Yes sir and right here! I’m looking forward to growing some moss.” Joallyn laughed, “It is a strange coincidence that he’ll be coming home about the same time that Josh marries and moves to our new place.” Curt wagged his head, “I have been angling for them them to provide me with a nice home in the country, but so far they’re not picking up on my hints.” “We got them,” Josh grinned. “Besides, your lease isn’t up for a while yet.” “That’s my Josh. He always is watching out for me!” Curt laughed. Johnny and Crandall came over to the table and Johnny asked, “May we you?” Bear grinned, “Pull up a chair and make yourselves at home. I thought you’d be sitting with CJ, Johnny?” “He is out drumming up votes,” Johnny crossed his eyes. “Wait until Charlie and CJ get a hold of you. Avoid those little girls with the Tea Cakes!” The slightly-built pilot Crandall laughed, “Although I have to say, the clergy are probably worse. I wouldn’t be surprised if they wouldn’t exchange exorcisms for votes before long! I never realized that penances can be used to buy votes. I doubt any of their bishops would be happy with them.” Rain and Brett came to them at the table and Rain said, “No one is worse than my Gramps. He and Father Vicaro should be banned.” Clarence asked, “What does banned mean? Is it like music?” “It is like they shouldn’t be allowed to play anymore,” Autumn explained. After she finished her plate, Autumn excused herself to go cut more pie. Clarence came along and in a few minutes, Curt showed up. “I don’t know what I’m doing, but if you show me, I’d be glad to help.” Between the three of them, they had all the pies cut up in short order. Only one pie of each kind was out and left uncut, so the judges could look at them. Curt smiled, “Maybe you can take them home for tomorrow.”

Clarence and Autumn both made a face and he chuckled, “Or, I could take them off your hands.” Clarence said to Autumn, “I think we should let him do that since he helped us. What do you think?” “I think that is a good idea.” Then she looked at Curt, “Mr. Arnold, if there is a pie left, you’re welcome to take it home.” “Mighty kind of you folks.”

They finished their eating and voting. The band leader, Bill Heinrich tapped the microphone. “Last call for voting. Five minutes and then the judges will be counting them. So, get up here if you missed one!” There were several folks who scurried up to get their last vote in, while Bill and his Boys began to play music. The tables were cleared of the dinner things, except for the buffet lines. The men moved them toward the back to clear space to dance while folks got their evening refreshments. Most of the kids ran outside to play. Autumn was beginning to get antsy and was wishing she could go away, too. Just as she was seriously thinking about going outside, Joey came up beside her. He knelt down next to her chair, “You doing okay? I’ve been keeping an eye on you. You should be fine, but if you get nervous just come over to our table. Okay?” “Thanks, Joey. I’m feeling a bit nervous, but I’m okay.” She patted her cousin’s shoulder, “You enjoy your time with Beth. You don’t need to babysit me.” “Yes,” he said seriously, “I do. Just , if things get out of hand, come find me or Ma.” “You got it.” Joey got up and left the table. Autumn looked up and noticed that Johnny had heard most of what they said, since there was little way he could avoid it. She turned beet red and he smiled calmly to put her at ease, “, I’m your

blood brother.” Then he did his Tonto imitation, “Indian man keep big secret!” She had to laugh that he was so silly and sweet at the same time. It made her feel better and then he asked, “What’s your poison? Crandall and I are making a run to the beer barrel.” “I guess I would like a Coke.” Crandall came over to them, “Want it spiked or plain? Johnny here is a teetotaler, but not me.” “I guess a little rum would be good, but not much.” “You got it, light on the rum,” Crandall nodded and he and Johnny left the table. Curt was visiting with the others and hadn’t overheard. Bear and Mabel were visiting with Elton and Nora Schroeder who were at the same table visiting with Auntie Alma and Uncle George. Autumn was glad she saw where they were sitting, so she knew where to go if she felt the urge to bolt. After the tables were sorted around and things were back to some semblance of order, Bill Heinrich tapped the microphone. “We have a surprise for you all. There will be a musical program presented now. Father Landers and the Lunkheads will play a medley of Herman’s Hermits tunes and then Gary Larson will present a few musical treats.” Autumn was anxious to hear that. Landers came out with the Lunkhead Accordion Band. There was a lively mixture of boys about the same age in it. Clark Olson was the drummer and CJ and Little Charlie were on the accordion, like the rest of the boys. She did notice that Clarence was not in the band and wondered why, but decided that maybe he was just too busy. The kids not only played but sang, and it was a nice presentation. What they may have lacked in talent, they made up for in enthusiasm. They sang one new song, You Can’t Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd, by Roger Miller first and they played four Herman’s Hermits songs, but really belted out their end song, I’m Henry the Eighth I Am. After the applause, Gary Larson came forward with his duo. She was surprised to see that Clarence was there with Ginger Ellison. The two walked up on stage as if they were each alone. They began to play their instruments and were great.

She didn’t recognize the instrument that Clarence was playing and asked the others. Johnny answered, “It is a native cedar flute and Ginger is playing the autoharp. Watch. It’s amazing because those two kids can’t stand to be around each other for more than five minutes without arguing, but Gary gets them to play together.” “They are very good,” Autumn couldn’t believe how talented they were. When they finished, they received a standing ovation, bowed, smiled at Gary, and walked off stage without even acknowledging each other’s presence. Johnny grinned at Autumn, “See?” The last performers were Clarissa Grey Hawk and Maddie Lynn Olson. Those two sang duets all the time and were invited to sing for neighborhood functions. They sang, Hey Good Lookin’, Whatcha Got Cookin? the famous Hank Williams song. Everyone laughed and loved it. Then they sang a couple more songs. Gary came on stage and announced a special event. Then he asked that someone bring Clancy Grey Hawk up to the stage. Of course, he was on Crandall’s lap by then, so he brought him up. Then Gary announced that the little guy’s second birthday was a couple days before and asked that everyone ed them in singing Happy Birthday. The little girls led as the entire group sang to the little boy. As brave and outgoing as High Pockets usually was, he became quite bashful and turned his face into Crandall’s neck and held on for dear life. When it was over, Crandall encouraged him, “Tell everyone thank you.” Instead the little boy looked at the audience and shouted into the microphone, “Again!” Crandall chuckled and handed the microphone back to Gary, “Thanks everybody.” Then Clancy started to clap. Johnny looked at Autumn and they both laughed and applauded. Bill announced that the dancing was now underway and to grab a partner. Autumn quickly lost her smile, but Johnny grabbed her hand, “You

heard the man. We have to dance.” She reluctantly went to the dance floor with him, but was really wanting to disappear. Johnny just took her hands and said, “You know how to two-step?” She nodded and said, “But..” “You won’t leave me out here looking silly, will you?” “No, I guess not.” They started dancing and after a few minutes had a good time. He was a good dancer and she was not bad once she allowed herself to enjoy it.

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That night, Autumn danced more than she had thought she would, in fact, more than she had ever danced. Brad did dance, but wasn’t a big fan of it. These folks seemed to really enjoy it. Clarence was waiting as soon as Johnny brought her back to the table. “You dance pretty good. I think you were just shy, huh? I used to be, too, but Missus and Pepper gave me a million lessons, so now I dance all the time. I will dance with anyone except Ginger.” “You two did a fantastic job with your music. Isn’t she a good dancer?” “She is a good one, but she always wants to be the boss of me. Missus and Aunt Marly said we can’t argue, so we have to figure a way to stay out of each other’s hair. I keep mine short now, but hers is all over the place! So, I sure don’t want to be next to her!” “I’m glad to see that you worked something out.” As they moved around the dance floor, Clarence explained, “Mr. Larson knows , so he says we only have to be nice to each other on stage and he doesn’t make us sit real close.” “He sounds like a good guy.” “He is the best, Miss Leaves. He helped me play my cedar flute and he ordered one for himself. Did you know that Mr. Johnny plays cedar flute, too? We played together once, before CJ budged in. I want to practice to be as good as he is some day.” “Why aren’t you with CJ in the Lunkheads?” “Miss Leaves, he is my brother but he mostly drives me crazy.” “Oh yes, I can see that. Well, I’m glad you play the cedar flute because you are

very good at it.”

Most of the clan men asked her to dance. She even got roped in to doing the Butterfly with Sammy and Joey. After that, she needed to take a break. She was worn out. While she got another Coke, she sat with Joey who was talking to Crandall. They started talking about Crandall’s schedule, “I have fisherman coming out of my ears this summer! Man, I fly the landlocked fishermen to the ocean and the ones who live on the ocean to inland lakes! It is good for my pocketbook, but makes me dizzy. After I leave here on Wednesday, I am taking three guys to Corpus Christi to fish in the Caribbean and go pick up some guys in Florida and take them to Lake Louise in Canada. Then I fly back to pick up the men in Corpus and fly them to Lake of the Woods!” Joey perked up, “You don’t say.” Crandall narrowed his eyes, “I hear a favor forming.” “I was wondering how much it would cost to give two people a ride to Corpus Christi and then back to Lake of the Woods.” “Now that would depend. If it was the same time as those others, I could give you the clan discount of 100%, but if it had to be at a different time, then I would have to charge for fuel.” Crandall studied Joey, “When were you going?” “Don’t know if we are. I know it would be Autumn and someone with her.” Crandall smiled at Autumn, “She is light enough, it wouldn’t take much fuel to keep her afloat. I think I could do a good deal for her. But why would you want to go to Lake of the Woods?” “She wouldn’t, but we can drive her back, as not to put you out any.” “Well, I’ll be back this way for Boyd’s big visit. Call me as soon as you make plans and we can see what we can work out. If your schedule is flexible, we can arrange something.” Then he grinned at Autumn, “You could be my stewardess.”

She smiled, “I could say ‘would you prefer coffee or tea spilled on you?’. Crandall groaned, “I can do that well myself.” A few minutes later, Father Bart came over and asked Autumn if she would do the Butterfly with Landers and him. She sighed, “I’m so tired, but I guess since you asked so nicely.” Bart turned to Landers who was behind him, “See, I knew she would for me!” Landers rolled his eyes and then took Autumn’s hand and they went to the dance floor. These guys were much tamer than her two cousins, who almost ripped her arms out of their sockets when they were swinging her. When they were finished with the dance, Bill announced a polka. Landers didn’t even let her go back to the table, but just took her with him. Bart grabbed Katie and they all did the polka. Then Autumn had to beg for mercy, “I have to go back and sit down.” “Thanks for the dance, Autumn. I enjoyed it.” Landers smiled as they started back to her table, “I hope you are having a nice time.” “I am, are you?” “I am. Thank you for asking.” He asked her, “Did you taste the turkey? What did you think?” “I liked it a lot. It could have used a bit more spice, but then I like things spicy and not everyone does. It was good and I’m not just saying that to be nice.” “I appreciate that.” “What did you think of the pie?” “I loved it. It will probably become my all-time favorite. I will have to eat it when Sister can’t see me though.” “Why does she give you a bad time about that?” “Oh, when I first got out here I gained fifteen pounds overnight, what with all the good food. She told me I had to watch it or I would require a whole new wardrobe. I lost it, but she keeps on me about it.”

“You look very nice,” Autumn said. “Don’t change a thing.” The music had started again for a two-step, and without thinking, they began to dance it. When it was over, Bill announced a slow waltz and Landers took Autumn’s hand and led her off the dance floor. He muttered mostly to himself, “I don’t trust myself. Thank you for dancing with me, Autumn.” She sat down and abruptly he walked away. She had enjoyed their dance very much and would have liked to do the waltz with him. She wasn’t certain what had happened. She visited with the folks who moved back and forth from her table. She talked to Curtis for quite a while, but he didn’t dance. Joallyn turned to him, “Are you going to sit here all night and miss all the fun?” “I just do the modern stuff,” Curt winced. “I don’t do these dances.” “Well, we can fix that. Come on,” Joallyn drug him to the dance floor. When they returned to the table, she giggled, “Okay girls. Your turns.” “All you said was stay upright and don’t cripple your partner!” Joallyn smiled with her blue eyes twinkling, “That’s all you need to know.” Curt frowned, “I have to say, I was jealous of Josh having a beautiful girl like you. Believe me, I’m not anymore!” Joallyn reached his hand down to Autumn’s hand, “Here, you two go show us what you’ve got.” Curt and Autumn danced for a few sets. They actually danced quite well together. He was a pleasant, polite person who seemed unaware how goodlooking he was. He was about five-eleven with an athletic build. Before they sat down, he said, “I don’t want to be forward since we just met, but if you think you’d like to, maybe we could go to a movie together or something some time.” Autumn was taken back, but stammered, “I think I’d enjoy that. Maybe not this week. It seems to be quite busy.”

Even though she had no idea what she would be busy with, he seemed to be okay with that. He answered, “As soon as I get my schedule, I’ll call you. Okay? Would Josh have your phone number?” “He would. Thanks for the dance, Curt.”

After that set, Bill broke in. “Everyone take your seats. I’ve received word from Grandma Katherine that the votes are in and the winners have been determined. Unless you don’t care, and want to keep dancing!” Everyone sat down and gave him their rapt attention. Bill started out, “First, the announcements. The end of August we will be having a going-away party. Chris and Pepper are leaving to go back to school in Chicago to finish his residency. We can’t wait for him to get his medical license, because we manage to keep Zach pretty busy. This week, we received some great news. Jackson Fielding was awarded a full scholarship for this coming year at the Montreal Art Institute. He will be leaving for Montreal in late-August for the school year. Stand up and take a bow, Jackson. We are all so proud of you!” Jackson reluctantly stood up and everyone cheered. He quickly sat back down by Katie, quite embarrassed by the fuss. Bill continued, “In other news, Randy and Bea will be moving to Bismarck this fall and have put a down payment on a house down the street from Darlene and Keith. They will be getting married as soon as he is out of the Air Force. Oh, and those Jessup Boys who have been the heart-throb of the county? The date has not been set, but they are marrying about then, also. Anything I missed?” Everyone shrugged and Bill continued, “So, goodnight folks.” Folks started booing and Bill laughed, “Oh, I suppose you want to hear who won this contest, huh? Let me hand the microphone to Carrie.” Carrie took it and began, “This competition might have to be disbanded. The blatant bribery and extortion did not go unnoticed.” The crowd jeered and booed, but Carrie continued. “You are incorrigible. We’d like to thank Dr. Samuels and Mr. Wolf for their oversight of the competition.

They both recommended that we hire Brinks Security to watch over the entries in the future. Again this year, a couple entries did not survive to be judged. The Band of Merry Men did a number on the homemade potato chips entry by Darrell and Jeannie. The kids tipped the bowl and did some sort of a rain dance on them. However, the judges tasted the crumbs and gave an award of honorable mention. Also, a few folks forgot to sign up, so Grandma’s Swedish black bread and the hardtack that Pepper, CJ, and Charlie made, missed out. They were tasted however, and most certainly were winners.” Then the serious business of the evening began. Carrie introduced the judges of each category, who stood to take a bow. She said, “As I read off the category and the winners, please come forward.”

“First: Soups and Chowder Keith and Darlene’s Wisconsin Beer Cheese Soup. Salads: Savannah Graf’s Greek Salad Potatoes, Rice and Noodles: Giovanni Capriotti’s Authentic Fettuccini Fruits and Vegetables: Mo and the Gophers’ Apple Chips and Caramel Dip Breads, Rolls and Quick Breads: Marly Ellison’s Zucchini bread. Cakes: Greta Schroeder and Gilda Heinrich’s Black Forest Cake”

Then Tea Cake Category was announced. The little four little girls who had entered were nervously pacing and chewing the insides of their cheeks. She read off the entries and then stated the Almond Royal Tea Cakes presented by Ginger and Iris Suzanne and the Lemon Queen’s Tea Cakes presented by Clarissa and Maddie Lynn won in a tie. However, instead of making all the girls happy, it immediately led to threats of defeat at next year’s contest. Apparently, this matter would not be settled until someone was brought down in flaming defeat. Carrie went on:

“Pit Meals: Father Landers and Father Bart’s Marinated Turkey Poultry: Giovanni Capriotti’s Italian Chicken Parmesan Fish and Shellfish: Father Colter and Reverend Carson’s Grilled Lobster Beef: Fathers Sebastian and Christoff Rotisserie Prime Rib Pork: Brett Schauer and Batman’s Mustard Baby Back Ribs.”

Brett picked up Batman from his Mom’s lap on his way up to accept the award. Batman kissed the ribbon, Carrie, Bill, and Brett. He was indeed a happy winner. They walked back to their table, but Batman kept his grip on the ribbon as Brett set him back in his Mom’s lap. The little boy did sleep with the ribbon for several nights, until it disintegrated from wear.

Carrie continued:

“Sandwiches: Jeff Wilson and Kathleen Finch’s Pulled Pork Sandwiches Snacks Beverly Larson and Savannah Graf’s Homemade Tortilla chips Desserts: Maureen Kincaid’s Cherry Fizz Pie”

Clarence came over by Autumn and held her hand while they waited for the reading of the Dessert Prize. They didn’t win and Clarence gave Autumn a hug. “I hope you aren’t sad about it.” “I’m not at all. We had a wonderful time and I made a very good friend.” The Chili competition was won by a non-attending member. SSgt. Hamilton who was in Vietnam. Kathleen Finch prepared it for him in absentia. In spite of the long faces of the Lunkheads since their peanut butter and bean chili didn’t quite catch on, they were glad that Hamilton won. Kathleen promised to mail the first place ribbon to Neil Hamilton. In the Native Category, the judges divided it into three parts. The Wild Berry Pemmican of Johnny and CJ won, while Jackson and Charlie took first prize with their Honey Wasna. Bear and Mabel Fielding took first place with their Bear Claws, a dough baked with meat, spices and cheese inside. After Wolf handed out all the ribbons and Samuels took several photos, everyone took their seats again. Then Bill’s band belted out some fanfare and to the roll of drums, the top three prizes for the night were announced. In Third Place AllAround Winner was Kid Effan and Josh Perkins for their Apple and Sage Rotisserie Pork!

After they came forward to a standing ovation, Carrie read the Second Place AllAround winner. It was the Dakota Mud Pie by Clarence Grey Hawk and Autumn Simms! They were both flabbergasted and everyone cheered wildly while they accepted the ribbon. Then the drums rolled as the tension built in the room. The First Place AllAround Winner of the 1972 Competition was the Rotisserie Prime Rib presented by Father Sebastian of Maine and Father Christoff from St. George’s Greek Orthodox Church in Merton! The two men, ribbons in hand, took the microphone. Being a clown, Christoff cleared his throat and began their acceptance speech. There was burst of applause at first, but once the audience realized he had a lot to say, the band tried to break in to get them to quit. He didn’t. Soon the audience became rowdy and finally, Sheriff Bernard in accordance with his duties to keep the peace, escorted them from the front to take their seats.

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Although the little kids went over to the Patch to sleep, most of the rest of the gang continued to dance and visit. Autumn visited a lot with Sammy and Joey’s fiancées, Beth and Bonnie. Bart came over to sit with his sisters and chatted. Joey mentioned that Autumn was curious how the services at the Catholic church were, so Bart gave her a personal invitation to visit St. John’s the following morning. “You can sit with my sisters, okay? They can show you the ropes! We do a lot of kneeling, standing, and sitting, so it is nice to have someone tell you when. I hate it when I’m the only one standing while everyone else is kneeling. No one will really care, because we’ve all been there. I look forward to seeing you.” Autumn also visited with Dr. Samuels and his wife a few minutes, and was very relieved that he didn’t let on that he knew her. They were visiting with Kathleen and Jeff. She also met Mr. Wolf, the clan attorney, and his wife. They seemed like fine folks. She and Clarence put their pies away and there were only three left. She offered to put Curt’s pies in a box for him and he was delighted. Then she put the last pie in a box and they took it to Father Landers. “Clarence and I want you to have this, from us.” Landers smiled, “That is very thoughtful, but don’t you want it?” Clarence moaned, “We’re mostly sick of it for a really long, long time.” “Well, I insist you guys take home some turkey. We will be eating on it forever, if we don’t share,” He smiled as he began to dish up some portions for each Clarence and Autumn. Clarence hugged Landers and Autumn goodnight, took his package and ran off to find Missus, while Autumn waited for Landers to package up her turkey. “The clergy cleaned house on the prizes tonight, huh?” “We did. I don’t know if Sebastian will go back to Maine now that he and

Christoff are bonded at the hip! Those two really get along well together.” Then he got a funny look, “Oh, I almost forgot. You and I have something to do. Can you come with me for a minute?” She shrugged, “What do we have to do?” “Just come,” He beamed and walked with her over to where Father Dimitri Christoff and his wife Dorothea, a friendly-looking lady in her late fifties. “I’d like you to meet someone. This is my friend, Autumn Simms. She is Alma and George Jessup’s niece from Georgia.” They were very welcoming and asked them to sit with them. Landers pulled out a chair for Autumn and then sat himself, saying, “We have a favor. Or actually, I do. I was bragging to Autumn about the wonderful Lomosov Porcelain you have, and I wondered if maybe you could invite us over to see it?” Father Dimitri was a jolly man and chuckled, “That’s what I like! A man who gets right to the point. Why do you say, Mrs. Christoff? Do you think we could fit? Father Sebastian will be there, since he isn’t leaving until Wednesday.” The lady pretended to be thinking, “I imagine we could juggle things around. When would be a good time?” “Since I invited ourselves, I guess you should say,” Landers grinned. “Generous of you.” Dimitri laughed, “How about Monday morning? And a bit of that pie would be a dandy addition to coffee from the Blue Cobalt china.” “We have enough to share with Sebastian, don’t you think Autumn?” Landers nodded, “I happen to have a pie over there that I will bring right over. That is if I can trust you to keep it chilled until Monday.” “You have my word,” Dorothea replied, “We will be eating Rotisserie Prime Rib all day tomorrow. This was great fun, but my, what work went into it!” Landers smiled broadly, “The clan rarely does anything half way!” Dimitri agreed, “I’ve been around them enough to know that’s the truth. Are you a clanner, Miss Simms?”

“I don’t know, but call me Autumn.” Landers interrupted, “She is and tiyospaye.” “Oh yes, that Indian thing that means extended family.” Dimitri concurred, “You know, I really ire that concept. Well, go fetch the pie, young man. I have to get my lady home so she can be ready for services tomorrow. You know, it takes her longer to get ready these days!” Dorothea frowned at him, “And you, sir? How long do you take to get ready?” “Oops!” Dimitri laughed, as Landers left that table to get the pie. “How long have you been here, Autumn?” “Only a few weeks. Father Bart told me there are a couple openings at the Retirement home for RN’s. I plan to apply. If I get it, I’ll likely stay for a while.” “That would be wonderful. I know one of our parishioners is retiring this fall. She has the day shift. It might be a good idea to apply soon, so that you don’t get stuck with the night shift,” Dorothea advised. “I work part-time in the istration office, so if you wander in, maybe we could have coffee?” “Thank you. That would be very nice.” Landers came back with the pie and Autumn told him what they had discussed. “That would be great, Autumn.” They settled on nine-thirty Monday morning before they said their goodbyes. Landers and Autumn went back over to their stations to finish cleaning everything up. “I forgot all about the Russian porcelain. I’m glad you ed.” “I’m glad I did, too. It will be fun. Do you want me to pick you up?” “No, I can pick you up! I want to practice driving the Banana. I have my appointment with Dr. Samuels and my drivers’ test on Tuesday.” “That’s great,” he said as he put the last of their things in the boxes, “Well, I guess I have to get ready to leave. First Mass is at six-thirty and it would probably be nice if I was awake.”

“Probably,” Autumn smiled. “Goodnight, Ben. You are such a nice guy.” He stopped a minute and then smiled, “You are a sweetheart to say that, even if I have to consider myself decked. Goodnight Autumn.” Within half an hour, Bill and the Boys played Good Night Irene, the understood signal that the dance was over. Johnny had asked Autumn to dance the last dance with him. After the dance, the group started to clean up the place. With everyone pitching in, it didn’t take long for most of it to be done. There was a small contingent who would be staying to finish the rest and then the grills would have to be cleaned the next day. Sammy and Joey were leaving with their girls and so Autumn rode with Aunt Alma and Uncle George. Johnny helped them load all the empty coolers into their car and then told them goodnight. “I hope to see you all tomorrow.” “When are you heading home?” Uncle George asked. “Tomorrow afternoon. I can’t miss much more time from work.” “I heard you are coming up for the winter.” “Yes, I am. I doubt I can make it for the camp out, but I will be moving up here about the middle of September.” “We’ll see you at the clan dinner tomorrow,” Uncle George waved.

That night, Autumn sorted through her clothes to figure out what to wear for church. She had to smile to herself, ‘Here I thought I’d be in isolation and only needed my blue jeans. What a miscalculation that was!’ After her bath, she decided not to take a pill since she had a couple alcoholic drinks. She curled up in her cocoon and thought over the events of the day. It had been a long, busy day with many things to think over. She liked Curtis, but was not impressed that he worked out of town so much. She knew how well that had worked before. She really liked Johnny, but he would be gone for another month. There was only one person that she really cared about the most, and didn’t think she should. ‘Why can’t life ever be simple?’

The next morning, Autumn crawled out of bed when she smelled the bacon cooking. ‘Good night!’ She reprimanded herself, ‘I slept like a log! I hope I didn’t miss church!’ She ran upstairs in her pajamas and found Auntie Alma frying bacon. Sammy was beating eggs and Joey looked up from the table he was setting. “Nice look you have going there! Think it will catch on in the fashion world?” “I think I overslept! Did the girls leave for church already?” “No, it’s only five.” Alma smiled, “They haven’t made an appearance yet. Maybe you want to go back and try again. You may want to rethink your attire.” Sammy handed her the ladybug mug he had filled for her, “Your outfit is okay, but the hair-do leaves a lot to be desired.” She took the mug and squinted at him, “Are you certain that Bonnie said she would marry you?” “She did,” Sammy said. “Go figure. But if I wore my hair like you do, it might not have happened.” She muttered some obscenity under her breath as she took her coffee and went back to her room.

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Her cousins and their girls decided to attend the six-thirty mass, come home and change clothes to go help clean grills at Kincaid’s Petunia Patch. Autumn was nervous about attending the Catholic service, of which her church did not entirely approve. Bart’s sisters explained to her that she didn’t need to make the sign of the cross or genuflect, but just walk with the boys. She clung to her cousins like glue. The inside of St. John’s was a fantastic mixture of polished wood and gold accents, with the most magnificent stained glass windows she had ever seen. It was beautiful. She was thankful to sit between Sam and Joe and not have to participate. They were relaxed because they had attended with the girls before. The service was fascinating for Autumn. She was very taken with the regality of the procession. It was stunning for her to see these men, Vicaro, Landers, and Bart donned in their priestly robes instead of regular wear. They were almost transformed from the good-natured friends she knew them as, to men of reverent authority. She watched the whole thing and listened carefully to Vicaro’s homily. It was very good. She was also amazed how well these men worked together and handled the entire service. Impressed would be almost trite to describe how she felt. She was deeply moved and had a new respect for all three men. She couldn’t believe when she watched Father Landers, that she actually had stood in the middle of the pasture and screamed at him like a deranged maniac, calling him every rotten thing she could imagine. What he must have thought! When the service was over, Vicaro stopped just outside the sanctuary doors to shake hands. Bart was in the foyer and Landers was by the outside door. Vicaro greeted Autumn with a huge grin and teased, “See anything you like here?” “It was wonderful.” “Come visit us anytime.”

Autumn nodded, but knew in her mind it was very unlikely. Then the group moved on to Father Bart. He embraced his sisters and Autumn and shook his ‘Bros’ hands with great vigor. “I’m so glad you brought our new friend! Where are you off to now?” “We’re going home to change into grubbies and help clean up at Kincaids.” “Oh, I felt simply horrible I was unable to help,” he guffawed. Joey snarled, “Priests aren’t supposed to lie.” “I had my fingers crossed, so it doesn’t count,” Bart teased. “See you later.” Then they moved to the outside door, where Landers was shaking hands. When he saw Beth, he grinned broadly, “Hello! This is early for you!” She giggled, “I wanted to make it before you all run down. I figure you would be good for an hour or so.” “Probably very true,” he agreed. Then he shook Joey’s hand and noticed Autumn standing in line behind him. The expression on his face was an enigma. He froze for a brief second and then seemed to regain his composure. He held out his hand and she shook it. They caught each other’s eye, but awkwardly said not a word. Thankfully, Sammy and Bonnie were right behind them and so the situation changed nearly immediately. In the car on the way home, the young people visited about the service and what Autumn thought of it, but they quickly went on to talk of the dance. Autumn was relieved, because she wasn’t sure how she felt about any of it. The closest thing she felt she had somehow been caught intruding into Ben’s life. And she would tell no one that. At home, they all ran to change clothes. Once in her room, Autumn closed the door and locked it for the first time since Joey had given her hell about the pills. She threw herself across her bed and cried, for reasons that totally escaped her. When she heard the boys going upstairs, she got up, and drowned her face in cold water and with the aid of eye drops, concealed the fact she had a good cry.

At Kincaid’s Petunia Patch, they worked with a collection of dedicated souls, scrubbing the various grills and pits. Some of them helped power wash the floor of the Quonset. Danny and Eddie Schroeder had brought a load of boys from the sleepover down to pick up all the trash and debris from the yard. When they were done, everything was clean. They were all finished before ten, so that the others could get ready for church. The young folks went home and changed clothes again. Bonnie commented, “We will have eight loads of laundry before noon!” They arrived at Schroeder’s before Elton and Nora returned from Church. Only Crandall was home, with Clancy. He greeted them, “Nora said you’d be here to help me get everything in order. I was worried, because this High Pockets is really wound up today. I think his moment in the spotlight torqued his mind!” The folks began to arrive after the last services were over. Autumn was glad to see that Curt came out with Josh and Joallyn. He was friendly and they were engaged in a fun conversation when the St. John’s Contingency arrived. Autumn saw them enter the kitchen and nearly fainted when she realized that Landers had not come with them. She could barely pay attention to what Curt was saying, trying to fathom if Landers didn’t come to dinner because of her. She was afraid to ask, not wanting to draw attention to it, but it was driving her crazy. Curt caught on that something was bothering her, “What is it, Autumn?” “Oh, nothing. I was wondering why Father Landers didn’t come to dinner.” “I know,” Matt Harrington answered as he was walking by, “When we left Mass, he said he was going to give communion to a lady at the Retirement Center who was not well. He should be here later. Were you planning on talking to him?” “Not me really. Uncle George was.” Matt smiled, warmly, “He’ll be here later.” She was immensely relieved and able to continue her conversation with Curt. He asked, “Is your uncle Catholic?” “Oh, that. No, he isn’t, but they are working on a project together.” Deciding she had better get with the program, she asked, “Where are you off to now?”

“I thought I’d be here all week, but the boss called this morning and they want me in Bellingham, Washington Tuesday morning.” Autumn got a devilish grin, “I suppose that you have a girl in every port, huh?” “It won’t be much longer and I can put down roots.” He smiled at her, “Do you have roots?” “None. I did, but that evaporated this spring.” “Josh told me about your fiancé’s ing right before your wedding. I can’t imagine how hard that would be to cope with. You have my deepest condolences.” “Thank you, Curt. I’m not past it yet, but I’m beginning to see light on the horizon. My problem is- I think it is the western horizon.” He frowned an instant and then laughed, “You may need to turn around.” “You got that right.” They were just about finished eating, when Landers arrived. The ladies quickly ushered him to his place and put reheated food out for him. At the end of the dinner, Elton Schroeder stood to make an announcement. “There will be a maiden flight of two new airplanes over at the Model Shed in about an hour. You are all invited to attend. It will be followed immediately, by the launch of three new vessels in the water tank, I mean Lake Zacharias. I think after that, Chatterbox and Danny have organized a riotous softball game. Anyone needing rides to the airport, please check in with Kevin or Ian. I’d like to take this opportunity for thanking everyone with the great response we had to the Cookout. It was overwhelming.” Father Sebastian raised his hand and Elton looked at him, “Yes?” “What if I decided to stay and never return home?” Elton nodded seriously before saying, “Right after your mental exam, we’ll send for your things.” “Do I need to a psychiatric exam?” Sebastian played along.

Elton shook his head, “Heavens no! Failure is required!”

After the dishes were cleared up, Autumn walked over to the Model Shed on Zach and Suzy Jeffries’ property. He built it to store the clan’s modelling equipment and models. It was set up to build the clan’s remote controlled planes and helicopters, but the kids recently requested a place for model boats. Elton, who was a big kid himself, scouted out a stock tank that they could use and bought it. The clan men installed it for them. That only inspired the kids to ask that their racetrack be moved. Until then, it had to be set up to be raced in the hallway of Schroeder’s home. The kids had most of the equipment, but had to store it away after each race. This way, it could remain set up, and also save the walls of Schroeder’s hallway. Johnny Standing Elk, Brett, and Danny really wanted a model train, so they were in the process of setting up an H model railroad track. So far, it only consisted of two sheets of inch deep four by eight pieces of plywood. They were initially going to put them together, but decided that it would be too difficult to do any work in the middle. They were also deciding on what sort of scenery to have: winter, summer, old-time or modern, city or rural. Even though the clan did many things together, their path was rarely without its share of boulders in the way. Before long, they decided to have different scenarios on each board, rather than one large one. Even though they had bought many supplies for the landscape; so far, not one rail had been laid. The trip to perfection is often slow. It was fun. Everyone stood somberly watching as both planes took to the sky. Then they broke into great applause. When Curt asked Josh who the planes belonged to, he answered, “Everybody. They all belong to all of us.” Curt smiled at Autumn, “I should have guessed that one.” Later they went inside the Model Shed and watched the boat launch. A replica Clipper launched beautifully. A newer yacht apparently sprung a leak and after traveling about four feet, went to the bottom with great glugs! Then a World War II battleship stayed afloat, but the engine only sputtered It had to return to dry dock for repairs. Normally, a bunch would have stayed and worked there, but today, they all went to in with the hot softball game. Names of those desiring to play were put

into hats and the team leaders, Chatterbox and Danny drew them out. All clanners played, regardless of age, and the rules were rather lax and changed to fit the circumstances. Father Vicaro and Pastor Byron were in charge of rules. Sheriff Bernard was the only one who could make a final call on safe, or eject anyone from a team. To date, a team player had never been ejected, but a few boisterous fans were put on probation. Landers was the catcher and Johnny played second base for Danny’s team, Bart played first base, and Curt was short-stop for Chatterbox’s team. Autumn chose to be in the stands, however a lot of girls did play. It was a raucous game and most of the calls were contested. Crandall and Elton kept the scoreboard which proved to be a dubious selection. The game was timed, so that everyone would have time to play and then make it for a light meal before they took off, either to pack or head to the airport. After the meal, Autumn decided to go home with Auntie Alma and Uncle George. Before they left, Uncle George went over to talk to Landers. The two men visited a couple minutes, but Landers never even looked Autumn’s way. That entire afternoon, they had not exchanged a word or smile.

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That evening, Joey tapped Autumn on the shoulder while they were all watching television. He motioned for her to follow him. Out on the front steps, he said, “We need to talk.” Autumn nodded and followed him, but thought she might throw up. She wasn’t certain just what she did but she felt that the bottom was about to drop out of her world. When they got to the corral, Joey said, “Pa invited Landers out for dinner tomorrow night for the meeting. Pa hasn’t told any of us yet what is going on but said he discovered some things that are quite disturbing. He said he is rather certain you may want to go South.” Autumn’s eyes studied her cousin, “I almost had figured that.” “I also want to talk to you about something else.” “Oh God, Joey. I didn’t mean to do anything wrong!” She teared up. With a puzzled expression, he put his arms around her, “I don’t know what you think you did, but I sure wasn’t going to say anything about your behavior.” “Really?” She took a relieved sigh, “I thought maybe you weren’t happy with me at the dance and stuff.” “That is just silly!” Joey laughed, “I was glad to see you getting to meet some folks and get out there dancing. That is a good thing. What do you think you did?” “I don’t know,” she shrugged, without looking at him. “I’m not sure I believe you, but we can talk about that later. I just wanted to ask you if it would be okay if Sam and I spend some alone time with our girls.” “You don’t have to ask me! Now who is being silly? I would have thought you were bats if you didn’t want to spend alone time with them.”

Joey smiled, “I love you, you know. At least, I hope you know that.” “I do.” What did you think of the dance and more specifically, Curt and Johnny?” “Well Cupid, I like them both. Johnny will be gone for about two and half months. And Curt is going back and forth out of town. I’ve been down that road before, and I’m not excited about making that trip again, any time soon.” “Patience. You just met them. There are other ships in the sea.” Joey grinned, “You will do just fine in finding someone else.” “I don’t want to be alone all my life, but I’m in no hurry to find another potential reptile. I need to straighten this mess out and get over it.” “I get it, but I want you to have fun and be out there. You did, and I’m proud.” Joey said, “What have you got planned for tomorrow?” “I was supposed to have coffee at Father Christoff’s home with Father Landers, but he never said anything to me today. So, maybe it is off. He might be mad at me because I went to Mass today.” “Call him and see, but I honestly doubt he’d be mad about that!” Joey put his arm over her shoulder, “The best way to clear the air is to be honest to the very person that you’re wondering about. Flitting around the fringes never gives a person a straight answer.” “That’s true, but you know, he is a priest.” “You like him, don’t you?” “Yes, I do.” “What did I tell you before about that?” Then he stepped back and looked at her, “There is no law saying you two can’t be friends, even close friends.” “I know, but I don’t understand the rules to being friends with a priest.” “Autumn, ask him. He’d know. I certainly don’t.”

“Will he think I’m weird and be upset?” “I know Landers enjoys your company, too, so no. I don’t think he’ll be upset. I’d be best you talk it over with him. Okay?” “Beth is a very fortunate gal. And so am I, to have a cousin like you.” “I know.” “Oh, spare me!” “Well if you are okay, let’s get back to the house. I take it you didn’t take your pill last night.” “No.” “You might want to take one tonight.”

That night, Autumn watched television with Aunt Alma and Uncle George for a while after the others left and then excused herself to go to bed. She had just finished her shower, when Alma called her, “You have a phone call. Can you take it?” “Be right there.” She said as she ran upstairs, fully expecting it to be her mother and took the phone in the kitchen, “Hello, Mother.” She was shocked when she heard a familiar chuckle, and then a man said, “Sorry, Autumn. It’s only me.” “Oh, hello Ben.” The living room was quiet and she knew the older folks had gone to bed, “I’m glad you called. I didn’t think you would. I thought maybe you’re very upset with me.” “We didn’t get a chance to talk today. I’m sorry. I had a very emotional day. I’m not upset with you at all. I was wondering if we are still on for tomorrow?” “You aren’t being up front. I know it and you know it. But yes, we are on for tomorrow, if you still want to be. I know I upset you by going to Mass. I now

realize that I should’ve talked to you about it first.” “Not at all necessary. You’re welcome to come to Mass whenever you want. My problem was mine, not yours.” Then he hesitated, and cleared his throat, “You’re right. I apologize. I’m not being totally upfront, but we can talk about it later. I would rather talk about it in person. Okay?” “Okay, that’d be better. , I don’t do well with hidden agendas.” “I know, and I don’t blame you one bit.” Landers hesitated again, “So we are on for tomorrow?” “What time should I pick you up and where?” “How about in front of the church, at quarter after nine? We could walk.” “Afraid of my driving?” “Yes, and I’m not shy to it it. , I’ve seen you run!” “I go slower with wheels.” “Only you would say that and be anywhere near honest.” Landers laughed, “See you tomorrow morning. I’m looking forward to it.” “I’m actually kind of nervous about it,” Autumn answered. “You shouldn’t be. Christoffs are nice folks.” “I think so, but I’m more nervous about seeing you, frankly. But I think talking to you’ll be a good thing.” “Me, too. I had almost forgotten how straight forward you can be when you are not buttoned up like Fort Knox.” “What sense does that make?” She giggled. “Not much,” he chuckled, and sounded more relaxed. “That’s what makes you so much fun.” “As Clarence would say, ‘I think I might be mad about that’. Isn’t that something

that those kids say that? I think they really do think about if they are going to be mad at someone or not.” “I guess they’re right. We always have the choice to decide what to be mad about.” Then he said, “Well, I have to go. I’m so very glad we talked.” “I’m glad you called. I was thinking myself into a minor fit.” “Don’t do that!” He answered definitely. “I’m fine, for sure. See you tomorrow in the Banana Cutlass!” She was very relieved that he had called and also glad to know that she hadn’t simply imagined that something was bothering him. She took her pill and curled up in her nest of blankets to get some sleep. At first, her mind was buzzing wondering what Uncle George had found out, what Landers was emotional about, and then debating whether she should have even mentioned anything to Joey. Finally, it was beginning to get the best of her. She made the decision to forget the whole stupid thing. Right or wrong, what was done was done. No amount of pacing would change a thing. The only sensible thing to do was to get enough to sleep to be able to think tomorrow when she would find out the facts.

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Autumn woke feeling rested. She made up her mind, right away, that there was simply too much to worry about, so she wasn’t even going to start. She thought about taking a tranquilizer, but decided that since she was going to drive, it wouldn’t be a good idea. She was anxious to make some forward steps in her life. She was very tired of mourning and moaning over the past. In fact, it made her angry. She wanted all that mess to be over. Thankfully, only Auntie Alma was up when she got to the kitchen. “Morning, I’m glad we have a minute to talk. Do we?” “Of course, the lovers were out so late, they almost met themselves at the door this morning.” Alma handed her a coffee mug, “What is it?” “A few folks told me there are some openings at the Retirement Home for a RN. They said that if I apply quickly, I may get the day shift. The other is a night shift, although it really wouldn’t matter to me. Do you think I should apply?” “Honey, there is no reason for you to feel that you have to on our . I hope you don’t feel pressured.” “Oh no, not at all. The job wouldn’t start for about six weeks anyway, so I would be mooching until then. I need to feel like I’m contributing something.” “Well, if that’s the case, then you should. The Retirement Home has a good reputation in the state and you’d be able to keep your hand in nursing. But would you rather have a big hospital setting?” “I don’t think so, right now. I really don’t. I have to get everything in order, but it would be a waste to let it all go.” “Then, you should do it. It would be near home and you live here.” “I’ll pay rent.”

“Not necessary. We both know that if George takes a turn for the worse, it will be a blessing to have you here. Besides, we kind of like you.” “I kinda like you, too. So, you think it’s okay then?” “Yes, but I’m glad it’ll give you some time to get other things sorted out.” Just having made that decision brightened Autumn’s outlook. At breakfast, she announced that she had a coffee date at Christoff’s home. She also announced she would be applying at the Retirement Home for work. Everyone thought it could be just what the doctor ordered. After dishes, she called the Retirement Home and found that their office opened at seven. They were delighted she was interested and told her to bring her license and curriculum vitae in at her earliest convenience and someone would talk to her. She thought it over and decided to do it before she picked up Landers. She dressed quickly, gathered her papers, gave Auntie a hug, and ran to the Banana. It was only fifteen minutes later, she found herself in the office of the Merton Retirement Home. She checked the time, because she didn’t want to be late picking up Landers, and it was 7:20. She had plenty of time. The interview went well and then the head nurse gave her a quick tour of the place. It was organized, clean, and up-to-date. “We don’t have many medical emergencies, but since we have an elderly population, it does happen. We do have some full-time nursing patients, but most are simply elderly. You’ll be responsible for the istration of medications for the patients, since most have some medication in their daily schedule.” It looked like a nice place, with only ten hospital beds, and then up to thirty patients who required some skilled nursing care. The rest were ambulatory. She saw a lot of activity and folks all seemed to be happy. Unlike a few horrible elderly care places she had been in during training, where folks looked like they were anxiously hoping the Angel of Death would come knocking. The nurse asked her why she hadn’t continued on in the Atlanta hospital, and Autumn went back to her comfortable old stand-by, half-truth. “I was just beginning my orientation. I was set to get married three days later, but received word that day that my fiancé was killed in a car crash. I just went over the edge.

I didn’t call the hospital or anything, although my father did, but I was just overcome with all sorts of things to deal with at once.” “Oh my, that is terrible. I’m glad you are doing better now. You live with Jessups? I know them both fairly well. They are fine folks.” Then woman stood and shook Autumn’s hand, “You’ll be hearing from us after we check your references, but I’m sure things will be fine. Likely we’ll call in a few days. Now the job doesn’t start for six to eight weeks. Will that be okay?” “I understand that. In fact, that will be perfect for me.” “Great. Since you are the first to apply, you will have your choice of shifts. There is one that begins at six and ends at two-thirty in the afternoon. The other begins at ten at night and goes until six thirty in the morning. Do you have a preference? The morning is a lot busier.” “I understand, but at this time, I would prefer the morning. However, if necessary, I will work the night shift.” “Thank you. I will be calling you soon.” Autumn bounced out of the Retirement Home in great spirits, got in her car, and checked the time. She pulled up in front of the red bricked church at exactly nine-fifteen and was very proud of herself. She parked and looked around, but didn’t see Landers, or anyone else, for that matter. She immediately started to worry. Maybe he had couldn’t go after all, maybe Christoff’s had cancelled, maybe.. There was a knock at the enger side window and she noticed Landers standing there. “Are you going to let me in?” “Sure,” she unlocked the door and apologized, “I was in Neverland. I’m sorry. I was thinking maybe things had changed since last night.” “No,” he said apologetically, “I was held up a bit, so I was late. I didn’t mean to worry you. Did you wait long?” “No, I just got here. Guess what I did?”

“What?” He started to smile at her excitement. She told him all about applying for the job and that it sounded promising. He was genuinely pleased, “That’s, great Autumn. I bet if feels good to make some progressive footprints, doesn’t it?” “Yes, it really does. I did fudge a little when the head nurse asked about why I didn’t stay with the hospital in Atlanta. I gave her my pat answer. I suppose that was wrong.” “I don’t think so. It was the truth, just not all of it. The rest of it wasn’t something that has anything to do with your work. I think it was okay.” “That’s a relief. I’m having enough trouble with God these days, I really don’t need anymore.” “I know.” Landers nodded, and then quickly changed the subject, “If you turn at the end of the street and go all the way across town, you will run into Christoff’s house.” “Maybe I should stop before I do that. I wouldn’t want to crack their china!” She giggled, “How was your morning?” “Interesting. Vicaro and I had a very long talk before I went to work. He will be ing us tonight for dinner. I hope that is okay?” “I’m sure it will be.” “You don’t mind, do you?” “In spite of the fact it feels very cryptic, I trust you. If you think it’s okay, then it’s okay with me.”

Father Dimitri Christoff greeted them. “Welcome. Dorothea has taken the pie out of the fridge and has the coffee made. Right now, she is trying to keep Sebastian at bay with a whip and a chair!” They had a wonderful time and they all agreed that coffee tasted much better

when served in a Lomosov Imperial China teacup from St. Petersburg, Russia. It was delicate and beautiful, as were the many icons and things in Christoff’s home. There were Matryoshka dolls and wonderful handmade lacquer boxes from Russia. Autumn could have stayed there just looking through their things forever, but before long, the phone rang. It was Sister Abigail. The Retirement Home had called for Landers. The lady that he had visited with the day before had taken a turn for the worse. He excused himself and then said, “I’m sorry, Autumn. I must go see to Mrs. Martell. I’ll see you this evening. Will you be okay?” “I’ll be fine. You are needed. If nothing else, I’ll have Christoff’s adopt me!” “Sounds good,” He patted her shoulder, ”Thank you so much Dimitri and Dorothea.” With that, he ran out the door and the two blocks to the Retirement Home. It wasn’t until he left, that Autumn felt out of place for a second. Dorothea smiled, “Come. I would like to show you some of the embroidered pieces that my grandmother made.” “I would love that.” While the two were looking over the delicate things, Dorothea said, “I’m glad you went to the Retirement Home to apply. I’ll look forward to you and I having a coffee break one day.” “We can do that,” Autumn said, “I thought I’d strike while the iron was hot. Sometimes I think myself out of something, or get myself so wound up that I become a basket case.” “I do that, myself.” Dorothea smiled, “You remind me of my daughter, Daphne. I miss her since she went off to school. So whenever you get the chance, feel free to call me. I’d love the company.” “I will do that, but I would think that you would have a lot of company since your husband is a priest.” “Oh, I do, but I do like thinking I have a friend that is mine. Do you know? I don’t want to feel like I’m Dimitri’s surrogate.”

“I understand. My cousin Marly said that she feels that way sometimes, too. I guess it goes with the territory. I had a doctor’s wife who was a good friend. She said she would meet people and the next thing you know, they would be telling her their symptoms or asking her what her husband told her about their surgery.” “Much the same, I imagine.” Dorothea smiled. The ladies went back to the dining room and found the men licking up the last bit of pie. Dorothea picked up the pie tin and looked, “Scraped a hole nearly through! I believe I see daylight!” Sebastian bummed a ride with Autumn over to St. Johns. He was a nice man in his fifties and seemed to be truly contented. When they stopped in front of St. Johns and he thanked her for the ride, he asked, “Autumn, may I ask why you study me so?” “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. You just seem to be one of the few truly happy people I’ve ever met. I was trying to figure out why!” He smiled, broadly, “Maybe because I am. I’m glad it shows. I spent a good deal of my life trying to be what I thought everyone else thought I should be. I finally just gave up and said, ‘this is what I am,’ for good, bad, or indifferent. I have been so much happier since then, I can’t believe all the years I wasted. My code now is, as long as it isn’t a sin, I’ll be myself.” “Thanks. That is something that I’ll try to hold on to.” “I hope it helps you as much as it did me. See you later, Autumn, and thanks for the ride.”

36-

That afternoon, Autumn told her cousin’s girls goodbye, but declined riding along to Bismarck to see them off. She thought that it would be nice if the boys could have more alone time with their sweethearts. She figured they agreed, since they were each taking their own car. Aunt Alma and Uncle George were home also, and she helped Alma make dinner. Uncle George was very somber and busy with his box and his notebook. She tried not to let that bother her, since she was certain he wouldn’t tell her anything before the meeting that night, anyway. She and Alma had a good visit while cooking and it was very pleasant. Autumn had almost relaxed by the time the boys came home. She ran downstairs to freshen up and considered taking a tranquilizer, but felt she had made such great progress that day that she wouldn’t need it. A few minutes after the table was set, the priests drove in. Uncle George went outside to greet them, as was the custom in North Dakota. The men were all chatting by the time they came inside. Alma welcomed them and then told them to take their seats, “Autumn is finishing mashing the potatoes and we’ll eat.” After Vicaro said grace, the wonderful dinner was ed around. They had Swiss steak, mashed potatoes, gravy, and creamed peas. Everyone ate until they were stuffed and then as Autumn collected the dirty dishes, Alma served a Chocolate Torte Cake and freshened their coffee. Vicaro gazed at his plate, “I think I may buy myself a horse. Didn’t think I wanted one, but if I can board it here and have dinner with you folks like Landers, I’ll sign up now!” “You’re welcome to us anytime you would like, but I thought you hung out with Kincaid,” George said. “I do. You know, that guy thinks he knows all about spy stuff because of his years with the FBI. I have to keep telling him that I can find out more in half an hour than he can all day!” the jolly man chuckled.

“Then your services may be required. Depending of course, on Autumn’s choice.” Uncle George became serious, “I went through the box of things that Brad’s father sent to Autumn. I’m not certain what all you know, Frank, so please don’t be shy about asking if what I say makes no sense.” Landers interrupted, “I’ve told him nothing about what Autumn confided in me.” He looked straight at Autumn, “I’d never betray her confidence.” Autumn just nodded, feeling a vague swirling sensation in the room. She took a drink of water and tried to calm down. She noticed Joey staring at her, and mumbled a ‘I’m fine’ when he asked if she was okay. He shared a look with Ben, got up, walked over to the front door, and slipped the dead bolt before returning to the table. She wondered at the time why he did that, but couldn’t really think very well at that point. It was dead silence until Joey took his seat again, and then George continued, “Is it okay, Autumn, if we fill Frank in some? So he knows what we are talking about?” Autumn nodded numbly, “Sure.” Landers watched while she sat there unmoving and then said, “Let me tell him what he needs to know to catch up.” Then he gave Vicaro a brief outline of what happened, leaving out the part about Autumn talking to Jake. Autumn was very relieved that he did that, because at that moment, she couldn’t have thought fast enough to do it herself. He gave a brief comment about their questions regarding the relationship with this Olivia. Father Frank Vicaro listened without comment and then nodded, “So, what did you find in the box, George?” “There was little information in the letters that you don’t already know, however, there were some interesting things in Brad’s check ledger and those ticket stubs. I know, Autumn, that you didn’t go through them all because you thought they were all ticket stubs to concerts and shows. I found a few more things in there.” George cleared his throat, “I was able to piece together most of this. Apparently he was in and out of trouble a lot in junior high and early high school. His family covered up things, kept the boy’s name clear, and tried to get him on the straight and narrow. His dad did not approve of this behavior and put the clenches on

him by the end of his sophomore year. He was told that he had to go out for sports and bring his grades up, or he would be sent away to a military school. If he didn’t quit getting into trouble with the girls, he was going to be disinherited. In fact, he was put on probation of sorts. His father strictly curtailed his allowance until he proved he could maintain a relationship with a respectable girl. A girl who could the muster with his parents, was not anyone he was interested in. He knew his father wasn’t messing around, so he decided to find someone. “Homecoming Dance of his junior year in high school.” George said he had made the notation in one of his notes that he found the perfect girl to placate his parents. He wrote with bravado he could play the game with this one and make it work as long as he needed it to. I can twist her like school clay.” Autumn gasped, “God! That was our first date! Homecoming his junior year!” Now the tears were rolling down Autumn’s cheeks, but she never moved, either to wipe the tears or get up from the table. Sammy set a box of tissues in front of her but she never moved a muscle. Her gaze was clouded and as if she was in some other place altogether. Alma looked at Landers who was very concerned and then she said, “Autumn. Do you want to go lie down? We can do this later.” She didn’t answer, but sat there like granite. Landers got up and moved over to her. He knelt down by her chair and said “Do you want to hear this or not? I can listen to it, and then tell you about it later. Would that be would better?” She moved her eyes to him with a dead expression and said, “This is fine.” He squeezed her hand, “Are you very sure?” “What the hell difference will it make if it’s now or later?” He stood and patted her shoulder, “Okay, but if it gets to be too much, just say the word. Will you?” She nodded. He tried to evaluate her condition, but then went to sit down. George Jessup said, “Look, I will speed it up.

“Among the ticket stubs was the receipt for Camille’s abortion. Also, he kept his parking receipt from that parking lot. Why? I can’t imagine. I found several gas receipts for a gas station in Smyrna over the time he was seeing Olivia. It looks like, unless he was in Dannonville, he was in Smyrna with her on the weekends.” “I figured that,” Autumn mumbled, wishing the blackness that was beginning to surround her would draw her into an eternal oblivion. “Then I found the receipt for a marriage license in Corpus Christi, Texas on the day before Valentine’s day and in the checkbook was a check made out to a minister there on the fourteenth. It looks like he and Olivia married.” Father Vicaro asked, “You mean he and Camille?” “No. Olivia Jerriman”. Everyone gasped, except Autumn, who stared in a unresponsive state. George continued, “Around St. Patrick’s Day, he deposited a check to his bank with the connotation ‘Olivia’, for $135,000.” Just like that, Autumn was out of her chair and into motion. Before anyone knew what she was doing, she dashed to the front door trying to unlock the deadbolt. She couldn’t get it open and turned to yell at Joey. She was giving him hell with language that would make a sailor blush, when Landers went over and grabbed her. He held her in both his arms to immobilize her. She was livid and furious, not only at Joey, but Landers, and nearly everyone but Brad. She wanted Landers to let go of her. She would take care of this all herself and no one else need to bother themselves! She could do it! She tried to squirm away from Landers so she could run, but he did not let her. After struggling for a few minutes, she gave in, and started to cry. Then he relaxed his hold and calmly encouraged her to take some deep breaths. Joey brought a glass of water and one of her tranquilizers. He talked her into taking it, but she was not very happy with any of them. Joey went back to the table and everyone sat in silence while Landers tried to get her to regain her composure. After a couple minutes, she whispered something to him and he nodded, “Everyone, Autumn and I are going out on the porch for a minute so she can collect herself. Okay? You can carry on with the meeting and we’ll catch up

later.” They went out on the porch and she sat on the top step, even though she was tense and trembling, and her knees were weak. He sat next to her on the top step and put his arm over her shoulder. They sat in silence for a bit and then she said quietly, “Vicaro must think I’m a real piece of work.” “I doubt that. From reading his expression, I think he was flabbergasted that Brad pulled all that.” “I don’t want to see Vicaro and Uncle George, ever again.” “Now you’re being silly. They were both almost as upset as you were. And between you and me, I think if someone had pulled that on them, they would’ve been more unglued than you.” “Do you think I’m unglued?” “You aren’t going to catch me in that, Autumn. You know perfectly well what I meant.” “Sometimes you make me so mad.” “Really?” He teased, “I would’ve never guessed.” “I still bet they think I’m horrible.” “I think they understand it better than you think. You have to realize, that no person is so much different from anyone else. Okay?” He gave her a squeeze. She hugged him, “What would I do without you?” “Yell at someone else! Do you want to go in and hear the further adventures of Superhero Brad?” “Ben, do you think that— I mean— I hate to even say it out loud— but do you think he has a wife somewhere? Why didn’t she come to his funeral? What was that money about?” “Honestly, I think we all wonder about that.”

She sat a few more minutes and cried a little. Then she said, “Okay, let’s go in. I need to face this one way or the other?” “Which ways are those?” Landers asked. “In a strait jacket or without!” He gave her a quick hug, “That’s my girl.”

37-

The two went back in the house. Alma got up and gave Autumn a hug. They headed toward the table and Autumn said, “I must apologize to everyone, especially Father Vicaro, for my outburst and my offensive language. Please forgive me.” The men all mumbled no problem, and then Vicaro said, “Under the circumstances, it is very understandable. You certainly have a very strong flight instinct. You know the fight or flight? I did make an observation that I’d like to share. The only two people I see you get quickly upset with are Joey and Landers, both of whom you trust. I’m glad for that. However I’d like you to do more yelling at Brad. He is the one who was disturbing your peace.” “I know. It’s hard to do that when he is dead! It makes me feel so stupid! How could I ever think he was even a nice person?” Sammy pulled out her chair, “Well, folks like him know how to make someone trust them. The rest of us poor saps can’t begin to do that.” Autumn asked quietly, “What do you think his intentions were with Camille? It sounded like they had future plans? Was he ever planning on marrying me? Did he even care about me except to quiet his parents?.” “I’m rather certain his parents didn’t know he was ever married, and it is doubtful that his friends did. I think in a little place like Dannonville, everyone would have known if he wed. There is something quite peculiar about the situation.” Alma returned with the coffee pot, “Well, I know you may not want to hear this, but for my money, if he hadn’t already gone to meet his Maker, I’d have felt the need to help him on his way!” “Alma Jessup! You old shotgun-toting moonshiner!” George reprimanded his wife, “What are you saying? You are not setting a good example.” “What would you do, Hot Shot?” The lady asked her husband bluntly, “If it was up to you?”

“Well, I have to it, I’d be finding me a whip. Thank goodness, it isn’t up to me. The question is, Autumn, what do you think you should do, if anything?” “Well, Landers already told me that I can’t dig him up and sock him, so I guess I have to let it go.” Autumn stared at her coffee cup for a few seconds, “But I do want to go down there. I feel that I really need to see about Olivia. Does she even know what happened to Brad? Does his family even know about her? Dr. Samuels and Auntie Alma said I need to go talk to my Mother and Dad. And I would like to cram this box up Vander….” she hesitated, “Send this box back to his parents. I still want them to know that he was a creep.” Landers caught her glance and she dropped her eyes, “Okay. Maybe I need to rethink that last part. I guess it would serve no good but to hurt someone else, but in all honesty, that is what I’d like to do.” Everyone fell silent and after a minute or so, Autumn said, “I’ll get my drivers’ license tomorrow, cash the check my dad sent, and then drive the Banana south. I’ll go to Corpus Christi and then to Dannonville. Then I’ll come back here, if you will still allow me to. I can do all that in time to start work.” This time it was Uncle George who blurted out, “Like bloody hell! You are driving nowhere! Hear me? We’ll work out how you get down there, but you are not allowed to go alone. I mean it.” Vicaro agreed, “That would be foolish! You are still under Dr. Samuels care and Ben’s… there is no way that you are going on an emotional cross country without backup.” “Well, Dr. Samuels certainly won’t come with me!” Autumn snapped, “I’m not a baby or an idiot. I can do this. It is my mess. I was the simpleton who fell for that alligator.” “I talked to Crandall and we can bum a flight with him to Corpus.” Joey interjected, “I’ll take off work and go with you before I move Beth out here. We can rent a car there and drive. Then maybe book a flight back to Bismarck.” “I would go, but I promised Bonnie I would go to Boston and help her pack to move back here. We were going to drive the U Haul truck. I thought you were going out there too, Joey? If you can wait and go later, one of us will go with you,” Sammy said. “I hope you can wait two more weeks, can’t it?”

Autumn frowned, “No, it is more important for you guys to do what you promised your girls. You don’t need to mess up your life on my . If you all won’t let me drive, I’ll fly to Atlanta and have Dad go with me to Corpus Christi.” “Do you think your father would go with you?” Alma asked pointedly. Autumn’s tears revealed the answer. Alma looked at George and they both shook their heads. “Nonsense, I’ll go with you.” Uncle George said. “We can fly.” “Autumn, I love your parents, but even if they would go, they wouldn’t be the best on this journey. Do you think?” Alma frowned, “George, you aren’t well enough. Besides, you have another chemo treatment on Thursday. We will go after that.” Father Vicaro interrupted with authority, “I decided that Landers will go with you. He had mentioned to me that you may have to go down south, and at the time, I couldn’t imagine the necessity for him to go along. Now I do. Bart and I can juggle his time. But I’ll tell you, if he hadn’t suggested it before this meeting, I would have anyway. Let’s call Crandall and see what we can work out.” Autumn frowned slightly, “You guys. Let’s just leave it. I don’t need to know and I can just write Mother and Dad a letter.” “That’s a great idea!” Vicaro said, flatly. “Before or after it eats you alive? Some things are better to simply settle. I say do it before you start a new job. You don’t want this hanging over your head. Besides, Landers is beginning to annoy me, so it’ll be nice to have him out of my hair for a while.” Autumn watched Landers expression throughout this entire exchange and it was very difficult to read. She could stand it no longer and then asked, “Father Landers, honestly, do you want to come with me to face this, or not? If you don’t want to, I perfectly understand.” He looked at her with more comion than she could have imagined, “Of course, I want to. That is why I talked to Vicaro about going. You know I would.”

She studied him, trying to judge just what the man was thinking. He had been sending signals in every direction these last couple days. Maybe it was just the state she was in, but she was totally befuddled. “How can I believe that?” “ when you said you trusted me?” She sat silently, “I do.” She paused, looked around the table, and said, “Okay. We’ll do it that way then. But you guys, I want you all to know that I just want this nightmare to be over. I’m so tired of it all.” “We know you do,” Joey said, “We want it to be over for you. Then you can clean out my pickup cab.” “Now there’s a real incentive!” Alma rolled her eyes. “Well, get to calling Crandall. We need to be making plans.” Within forty-five minutes, the plans were somewhat set and Crandall had been notified. A tentative schedule was set and somewhat of an agenda formed. They all knew it would be open to change as more information unfolded. Joey would take Autumn in to Samuels the next morning and none of this would happen if he didn’t agree it would be a good thing for her to do. They were to have Samuels call Landers as soon as the appointment was over. Samuels and Landers had worked together on many cases, and would be able to discuss Autumn’s condition if she gave the permission. She did. The group didn’t talk much longer, deciding to talk again the following day. Then the priests left for home and the old folks went to bed. Joey asked if she wanted to go for a walk with him. She said she really did and promised that she was too tired to go running off. At their stumps by the creek, they sat quietly for a bit. Then she said, “Thanks Joey. I hope I didn’t embarrass you tonight.” “Why do you always say that? You didn’t and I doubt that you could. I’m really sorry that I can’t go with you. I would have, you know. Beth would have understood. But I do think that Landers has more experience dealing with problems.” “You need to help Beth move,” Autumn nodded. “I know there is nothing that anyone can do to make this better. I imagine things will just be the same when I come back.”

“If you feel that way, why go?” “There is just something in my gut that makes me think I need to. I have no idea why.” She looked at her cousin, “Do you think I’m crazy?” “No.” Joey answered, “I don’t think anyone else does either. Landers figured that you would want to go down there before we even heard about Olivia’s marriage, so I know he doesn’t. , he had already asked Vicaro about going.” “I suppose Vicaro is like his boss, huh?” “Honestly, I have no idea how that all works, but I would imagine he would have to clear it with those guys before he took off.” He said, “Well, Wonder Woman, I think we should be heading back, huh? Have we had enough excitement for tonight?” She stood and then giggled, “You know what Landers called Brad when we were on the porch? “No, what?” “Superhero Brad.” Joey chuckled, “That’s good. I could think of a few more things to call him.” “Joey, you don’t think that he- like, had anything to do with Camille’s not being around, do you? I mean, like where is she? You don’t think he hurt her, do you?” “I wouldn’t put anything past him. Not one thing.” Joey answered, “How would you feel if he did?” “I don’t know. I guess sick, a lot like I feel now. Honestly, I would have a difficult time believing he had nothing to do with it.” She smiled wryly, “You know, he told me he had a contagious flu bug over Valentine’s so he couldn’t make it to the dance in our hometown. He was getting married! He was such a damned liar. I actually felt sorry for him!” Joey gave her a hug, “In my mind, I don’t think he was hooked together right.”

After a long hot bath, Autumn curled up in her nest. She made a vow to herself that night. “I will never let anyone mean as much to me again as I did with Brad. Ever.”

38-

The next morning, the boys got up and went to do chores. Even Uncle George was up, drinking his coffee when Alma looked at the clock, “It is six-thirty already and no sign of Autumn. I think I better check on her.” Uncle George nodded, “Might be a good idea. Last night was a difficult one for all of us, and even more for her. That Brad was some kind of weasel. From looking through that box, I have deduced that he was almost psychotic, or whatever you call it. I thank God our girl survived with her life. Between you and me, Alma, he had a couple more girlfriends that I didn’t mention last night. I think reading between the lines, he likely killed one of them.” “I’m not surprised. In fact, I’d bet anything that it didn’t just start when he was in Atlanta either.” “I thought that myself. I’m very glad Landers is going with her. Joey is good, but he would get nowhere with Grace and Ron. Nor does he know about dealing with folks on pills and such. Landers has a lot more experience with folks who are about to crack. I don’t know how someone can work with folks on the edge and maintain any kind of normality.” George put down his newspaper, “I think he is a fine person. What about you?” “I do too, and more importantly, Autumn trusts him. That is very important right now.” Alma wiped her hands on the kitchen towel, “I’m going to go see what’s up with her.” Her room was quiet when her aunt knocked on the door. She didn’t answer, so Alma just pushed it open. She went in and found the roll of blankets on the bed, but saw no sign of Autumn. Her first thought was that sometime during the night, Autumn may have went out for one of her famous runs. Praying with her whole heart, she tried to keep from panicking and checked the bathroom. There, in a corner, sat Autumn, crying into a big bath towel. Alma sat on the floor beside her niece. Autumn looked up to her and said, “Auntie, I am just so scared.”

Alma held her for a few minutes and let her cry. Then she quietly said, “It’s okay to be frightened, Autumn. You’d be crazy if you weren’t. But I believe that things will work out. I’m not one for religious platitudes and all that, but this is one of those rare times when I feel that there is more to this than we see right now. I want you to be brave, do what needs to be done, and then come home to start a new life. I want you to trust Father Landers. He is a good man and while he may make mistakes, I feel he wants the best for you. He will help you. And please know, that even if things go terribly awry, you have a home here with us. Always.” Autumn’s only response was to cry harder for a minute, cuddled in her aunt’s loving arms. Finally, she pulled herself together enough to say, “I love you so much, Auntie.” “I love you, too. Now, before the boys get in and eat all the waffles, I think you better get those tears washed off and get dressed, so we can get our fair share.” Alma patted her back and then they stood up, “I’ll be glad to help you get packed and all that. , you are my shotgun-toting moonshiner kin, like Pa said. We’uns don’t weaken at a trifle.” Autumn smiled slightly and then noticed her reflection in the bathroom mirror, “Oh good grief! I look like a freak.” “I was about to mention it to you, but figured that you might notice on your own!” Alma giggled, “I’m going up now and leave you to your magic.” It took her about fifteen minutes before she gave up and just went upstairs. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and her face and eyes were swollen from crying, but at that, it was an improvement. When she came into the room, the boys and Uncle George looked at her in shock, but never commented. They all surmised the situation. George said grace, and during it, asked God to watch over Autumn and Landers on their venture and grant them strength and peace. Autumn started to cry again and Joey just quietly reached over and gave her shoulder a squeeze. As they began ing the waffles and bacon, Sammy said, “We aren’t leaving here until Wednesday, so if you need anything, feel free to call. I’ll leave Bonnie’s number for you, so then you can reach us there. I feel badly that I said I couldn’t go with you. I hope you didn’t take it that I don’t care.”

“Oh Sammy, I know better. I know you care.” Autumn smiled, “I’d feel awful if I thought that you or Joey messed up your relationships because of a jerk like Brad. He was an awful person. Father Vicaro was right, you know. This was his doings. I know I’m no saint, and likely neither were Camille or Olivia, but I doubt that any of us deserved what he did. I want you guys to know that I’m so very thankful that I have people like you to count on. I know I can’t trust my own judgment. How on earth I could begin to believe in someone like Brad scares me half to death!” George thought before he answered and said quietly, “I think we have all had a Brad in our life at some point. Don’t let the person who misused your trust, destroy the joy of knowing there are others that you can trust. That would be giving them a gift that they do not deserve.” She looked at him and then nodded, “I will try.” “That’s all that anyone can do.” Her uncle then said, “So, what is the schedule for the day?” Joey answered, “Autumn and I have to be in Bismarck to see Samuels at ninethirty. Then is her driver’s test. Or do you want to put that off?” “No. I will do it. That is unless I have a hard time at Samuel’s office. Do you think he’ll think I need to be committed or something?” Sammy answered, “Highly doubtful, but you need to tell him everything. No holding back.” Autumn nodded, “I promise I will.” After Autumn showered and washed her hair, Alma wanted her to sort through her dirty clothes, to see what she wanted to take along on the trip. They had to hurry to make it to Bismarck in time. On the way to town, Joey asked, “Is it okay with you that I talk to him, too?” “Sure. I don’t care. I don’t imagine I’ve been a joy to be around.” “Ah… you aren’t too bad.” He chuckled, “I do want to find out about the prescriptions and such. I worry that you will take off running in a strange city.

What would Landers do?” “I’ll try not to. Honestly Joey, I’ve about given up. I don’t think there is much more that I could learn that would make me run.” “You don’t know that.” Autumn was called in to her appointment. Joey had only picked up a magazine when Dr. Samuels came out and talked quietly to his receptionist. Then he motioned for Joey to follow him. Without a word, they went into his office and Joey sat in the chair next to Autumn. Samuels sat behind the desk and said, “Autumn told me a brief outline of what’s going on. I checked with my receptionist and we can have another half hour available for this appointment, so I want to go over everything. I’m very glad that you want to talk to me, Joey. I was disturbed that Autumn hadn’t told me the whole of it on our first visit. So, shall we start from the beginning and this time, don’t leave out any details.” The three talked for a little over an hour and at the end, Samuels had been filled in completely. Joey learned a few more things that even he had not been told, yet. Autumn had always said how religiously Brad had behaved. She had not mentioned that in the last couple years, he had become very demanding about having sex with her. From what she said, which was sparse, it was quite abnormal. She hated it, but thought that it was nearly sadistic. When asked what he did, she shrugged and mumbled, “He liked to put out cigarettes on me, or choke me. That other of that kind of stuff. He seemed to get off on that. I was terrified to talk to anyone about it and just hoped that he would change after we got married.” “I’m not surprised to learn this. He wouldn’t have gotten better. It seems he was a sadistic individual, and likely a sociopath.” Samuels confirmed that and said, “But know, it isn’t in any way your fault. However, it does little good to worry over that now. We will want to discuss this further at a later time, Autumn. I know it is something that you will not be able to simply walk away from, and we need to deal with it. However right now, we have more pressing things to discuss, but please know that Brad was not a normal person. Men don’t treat the women that way. Okay?” Then he leaned back in his chair and said, “Ideally, I would have liked a month or more so you could work all these things out and then gather your strength, but

since you will be starting to work, this is the best. It would be unrealistic to start a new job and then have to dive back into this mess again. I know Landers rather well and he’ll be great for you. He has a lot of experience with emotional issues. I am very comfortable with him traveling with you. With your permission, may I call and speak to him and share our information?” “That would be fine. He had asked if he could talk to you. He knows almost everything that I’ve told you today, anyway. We have no secrets, except about the sex stuff.” “Do you want to keep that from him?” Samuels asked. “Whatever you think. I don’t care about it much anymore.” Autumn frowned, “Don’t you think it is weird that I need to have a babysitter?” “Not at all. Folks need a system. It helps keep them on an even keel and gives them someone to talk things over with. And Joey, I want Landers to keep her pills for her. I am going to give her another prescription which won’t make her sleepy to take each morning. Save the other for night. Autumn, if you decide you need to sprint off, I’ll give you another prescription for that occurrence. Landers will keep control of all of them.” Samuels looked at her, “Everyone has the fight or flight response, but in situations where the fight response has no chance of working, some folks just run. I think you have convinced yourself that there is no good outcome and you feel trapped. So, you run. “In some ways, you’re right. You will not be able to bring back anyone who has died, nor will you be able to explain it all to others to understand. You also have to become aware that the relationship you and Brad shared was not as you choose to it. I think you were blocking out much of the bad for a long time. Likely that is where some of the resentment came from toward Brad’s hero reputation. I think you may have known deep inside that things weren’t right and normal. He managed to convince you it was your fault. That sort is expert at that. I think now, you will be able to build an honest evaluation of that relationship. That will enable you to build a healthy relationship later.” “Oh, I made a vow.” Autumn answered optimistically, “I will never, ever, as long as I live, ever allow myself to love someone. Ever again” Samuels smiled, “Oh that it were so easy, Autumn. You will be more cautious, but in time, you will. Love is one of those things that human beings need to

survive well. Don’t be too quick to sign it off. We are social creatures and it is in our DNA.” “Well, been there, done that.” Autumn determined, “You will see. I want no part of it.” “It will take a lot of work to rebuild your trust and confidence, but you need to do it. We can talk about it later. First, we need to find out what all you have to deal with. Have a safe trip and make it worthwhile. Don’t leave anything undone that you honestly feel you need to do, but be very cautious not to simply hand over your anguish to someone else.” “I know. Father Landers has already given me a lecture about that. In fact, more than one.” Samuels smiled, “My guess is that he’ll be giving you a few more. I’ll call him today. I’m glad I have your permission to speak freely to him. Joey, can you see to it that Autumn’s prescriptions are given to him?” “Of course, and thanks for allowing me to sit in today.” “It was a great idea. I’m confident that with this great team, Autumn, you’ll do just fine. Call me when you get back and we can set up an appointment. Here is my card. If anything comes up, call me. I will be happy to talk to you or Landers on the phone.” “Thank you, Dr. Samuels.” “Good luck with your driver’s test.” “Oh, my friend Clarence Grey Hawk says it isn’t luck. I’ll try to do the best I can, and if I need to practice more, I’ll do it over until I do.” “He is a great little fellow. Oh, and I loved that Dakota Mud Pie!” Samuels smiled, “So what are you up to now?” “We have to call Landers and then go to the DMV.” “Unless there is something else you need to talk to him about, I can call him for you. Hold on a minute.”

Samuels called St. John’s and the secretary called Landers to the phone. He introduced himself and then said, “I’ll let you talk to Autumn first, and then I would like to speak with you, if you have time.” Samuels handed the phone to Autumn and Landers said, “Good morning. How is it going?” “Okay. Dr. Samuels said we should go south. Joey and I and were wondering if you need us to pick up anything for you from Bismarck. Then I’m going to take my drivers’ test.” “Thanks for asking, but I think I’m good.” Landers teased, “I’m glad I’m not on the road, right now, knowing you are behind the wheel.” “That’s mean. I got you to Christoffs without a wreck.” “Yes, you did, at that. I hope it goes well. Have a good day, Autumn.” “You, too.” She answered and then handed the phone to Samuels.

After a quick stop at the pharmacy, they went to the Capitol building and found the DMV. The drivers’ test went well and she got her license while Joey licensed the Banana and called his insurance agent. They went to the grocery store for Alma and bought a hamburger to eat on the way home. They stopped in Merton at Carrie’s bank to open a checking for Autumn and deposit her check.

39-

That afternoon was a busy one, packing and trying to figure out what they might need. They had an early supper of cream of potato soup. Then Sam asked if she wanted to go for a short horseback ride to clear her head. “I don’t know? I should help Auntie.” Alma answered, “Get some fresh air. I have this. It’ll do you good.” The ride with the boys did make her feel better and she was able to get to sleep in no time. It was good thing, because it seemed that she had just closed her eyes, when she heard Joey knocking on her door. “Wake up, Leaves. It’s threefifteen and you have a plane to catch!” They were all awake to tell her good-bye. Sammy had made coffee and Auntie Alma and Uncle George hugged her goodbye while Joey put her bags in the car. “Now you call when you get checked in. I booked a place that looked nice, so let me know.” George handed her a paper with the Bed and Breakfast information on it and then all sorts of other information she might need. “Ma and I also have a few travelers checks here for you, if you need them.” “No. I won’t take them.” “Yes, you will,” Alma said with determination. “It is good to have a backup and Carrie said she can cash them back in when you get home, if you don’t need them. Now, listen to us.” Autumn hugged them all and climbed into Joey’s pickup. She was about to cry when Joey said, “Don’t you dare! You’ll scare the bejesus out of Crandall. Just choke back those tears.” “Okay. Will we make it to Garrison in time?” “No. We are going to Schroeders. Elton is taking the station wagon. Landers will meet us there.” Joey smiled, “Since Crandall is the pilot, the plane won’t leave without him.”

When they drove into the yard, Autumn was surprised that the house was so lit up. Andy was just bringing the station wagon up and he stayed out to help Joey transfer her bags. The three started inside as Father Vicaro’s car turned in. Andy stayed out to help put Landers’ bag in the wagon. Inside, Autumn was greeted with an anxious Clarence giving her a big hug. “I had to get up so I could be sure to tell you good bye, Miss Leaves. Missus said I could give you this picture of us when we won the ribbon, so you can me.” “That is wonderful but I’d never forget you. I’ll keep it in my purse and when I get back, I’ll give it back to you.” “I’m sorry that bad stuff happened, but you’ll be able to fix it. Father Landers is a pretty good fixer guy, so he can help you. You come right back. Okay?” “I will, Clarence, we have to go to that movie next year!” The men had all come in and Clarissa, Clarence’s younger sister, was there. “I’m gonna hug Mister Father because about Clarence hugged Miss Autumn.” And she did. She gave Father Landers a big hug and kiss on the cheek. Then she reminded him that he lived in North Dakota, so he wouldn’t forget. “I writed it down for you, if you get losted. Can you send me a poster card to here, if you have time? I know you’ll be busy making those people quit being bad to Miss Leaves.” “Thank you so much,” Landers said as he looked at the note which had four lines of scribbles on it and a few recognizable letters. He folded it carefully and put it in his pocket, “I think we’ll have time to send you a post card.” Then Kitten came over and hugged them both. Afterward she nodded, “What they said.” “That is sweet, Kitten.” Autumn smiled. “We’ll send you a postcard, too.” The little girl smiled broadly and nodded, “Okay.” CJ came over and shook Landers hand and then gave Autumn a hug, “I will take care of your rabbit for you. You the one you named?”

“I do. That’s very nice, CJ.” Clancy was holding on to Crandall’s neck for dear life and wouldn’t let go, even when the other kids told him goodbye. Grandma handed Landers a bag of caramel rolls for the trip and a big jug of coffee. Clancy always rode to Garrison with Elton and watched his ‘Creekow’ take off. Vicaro said a prayer with them and gave Autumn a hug. “Have a safe trip. We’ll keep you in our prayers. You need anything, call.” After another round of goodbyes, the group loaded into the station wagon. Clancy was stuffed in his car seat, crammed as close as possible to Crandall. Landers and Autumn sat in the back seat and waved to the small crowd as they left the yard. The drive to Garrison was about a half an hour. Two-year old Clancy chatted a non-stop line of lingo for about the first two miles, and then instantly went to sleep on his beloved Crandall’s arm and slept the rest of the way. Landers chuckled, “How can he go to sleep so fast?” “Beats me,” Elton said about his adopted son. “This guy has two speeds. Supersonic or unconscious.” “He takes after his Creekow,” Crandall boasted with pride. “Do you even hear yourself?” Elton squawked. “Honestly, sometimes I think you two are related.” “Eat your heart out,” Crandall chortled. “So, after this couple weeks, I’ll be flying to Canada to get Penningtons and Boyds. Then I’ll take the whole outfit home after the camp out. Those boys are looking forward to sleeping out on the prairies. Can you imagine that?” “No, but I’ve done it.” Elton smiled. “I’m sure they’ll get over it, too.” The men chatted about the clan events and all the goings on, most of which Autumn had heard. She just leaned back in her seat and watched the gravel road by outside the window. She thought how sweet Clarence and the little kids were. She got a few tears and Landers noticed. Even though they had hardly exchanged a glance, he reached over and squeezed her hand. “You okay?” He asked softly.

“I’m fine.” He nodded and then continued to visit with the men. When they arrived at the Garrison airstrip, Elton pulled over to the hangar. As soon as the car stopped, Clancy’s eyes popped open. “Creekow fly! Whoosh!” Still carrying Clancy, Crandall walked around and checked the plane. Elton helped Landers pack their things in the cargo bay. Landers noticed that Autumn had brought the box from Vander Vorsts. At first Autumn thought he might object, but instead, he asked, “Do you think this is secure enough?” Elton looked at the tape, “I have some duct tape. Let’s give it a go around with that.” Landers asked Autumn, “Will that be okay?” “Sure,” she mumbled “I didn’t know if I should bring it. What do you think?” “Well, there is room. It is easier to have it and not need it, than to not have it and wish you did,” Elton pointed out. “Right?” Landers smiled, “Good point. We don’t really know what to expect.” Elton turned to both of them with great seriousness, “Look, if there’s anything you need at all, just call. The clan will do what we can. Count on it.” “You’re the best, Elton,” Landers said. “You just get everything sorted out so we can get back to enjoying your company.” Dawn was just breaking when they began to get in the airplane. Landers offered the co-pilot seat to Autumn, but she knew he was much more interested in it than she was. “I’ll sit back here with all the caramel rolls.” Crandall, the slight, sometimes surly loner, grumped, “Hm. You better plan on sharing with the pilot at least. Or it will be a very short trip for you, Sweetheart.” Clancy mimicked Crandall, “Seedhard!”

She giggled, “Okay, I’ll share.” Clancy relayed to his idol, “She share. Okay Creekow?” “That’ll be fine.” After Elton peeled the little boy off Crandall, the pilot climbed into his seat and they took off. Autumn watched out the window as Elton and Clancy waved goodbye until they disappeared into the darkness. Landers was fascinated by all the switches, gauges, and the talk back and forth to the air traffic controllers out of Bismarck. When they settled back as the plane had quit climbing, Crandall said, “Now if the stewardess is worth her salt, we may get a caramel roll and a cup of coffee.” After they had their roll and then washed up with the wet face cloths that Grandma had thoughtfully packed for them, Crandall announced, “Now, in case you didn’t guess, I’m not much for chatter, so I usually play my music. It helps me concentrate. So, unless there is something pressing, I’ll be turning it on.” “Do you have a favorite station you listen to?” Autumn asked naively. “Oh hell no!” Crandall blurted, “Oh, sorry Father. I listen to my own music.” Landers smiled, “Okay then.” “We’ll land this tub in Kansas City,” Crandall stated, “Next stop. There’s a can in the back of the plane if you need it, but otherwise, the next bathroom is in Kansas. Sorry Father.” “I certainly hope you don’t intend to finish every sentence with ‘Sorry Father’,” Landers laughed. “Well no, I usually don’t apologize, but ever since I got wound up with this outfit, I don’t know how to act half the time.” “No need to change on my ,” Landers said. “I actually rather like you, except when you took it upon yourself to beat the socks off Jenny and I in cards that day. it it, you cheated. Didn’t you?”

Crandall laughed, “You’ll never know. So is it okay if I turn on my music?” “It is with me, what about you, Autumn?” “Is it opera?” Autumn asked, poking Crandall. “Oh God no! I’m not going to say I’m sorry about that!” Crandall played the tape of his favorite songs, over and over, Gale Garnett’s We Sing in the Sunshine, Glenn Yarborough’s Baby the Rain Must Fall, Pernell Roberts’ They Call the Wind Mariah and Lee Marvin’s Wandrin’ Star. While Autumn liked them all, after the fourteenth time, she and Landers exchanged a grimace of agony. She settled back into her seat and dozed. When she woke a little later, she heard them visiting. Crandall had finally turned the music off and he and Landers were having another cup of coffee. They were visiting about the clan and Crandall was saying, “Yah, it’s hard to be young. Hell, I wasn’t that young when I messed up with the one girl that really mattered. Still tears me up.” “Really?” Landers asked. “Are you going to try to see her?” “That’s what Johnny says I should do, but hell man, I’m older than dirt and still not nearly as grown up as he is. She would look through me like so much hot air, like she did the last time I saw her.” “How long has it been since you’ve seen her?” “Going on sixteen years.” “Well, if you love her, you should at least give it a try. What can it hurt?” “You don’t understand. I never had a real home. I was jockeyed around from foster home to foster home all my life until I ended up in the military. I’m not domestic material,” Crandall told him in a rare glimpse into his personal life. “That is little reason.” Landers shared, “I was raised in an orphanage. I know what you mean, though.” “Well, I’ll be damned.”

“Gee, I hope not!” “I didn’t know you were an orphan. I’m glad it worked out for you, but I don’t have much time for church stuff. I know you do, but what are you saying?” Crandall pointed out, “Look at you! You didn’t have a home and now are a priest. You don’t have a domestic home life! Are you being hypocritical?” “I hope not. I don’t think I became a priest because I was an orphan, but I see what you are getting at.” “Does it ever bother you? Not getting married, or having a lover?” “Yes. I’d be a liar to say that it doesn’t bother me. I’m a human and not immune to attraction. Sometimes, I wish things could be different, but they aren’t. I made a commitment and I need to live up to it.” “More power to you, but it sure as hell wouldn’t work for me!” Crandall retorted, “I’d get me a jug of rum and throw the whole blasted thing out the window.” Then he got quiet, “Actually, that is exactly what I did when I lost the best girl I ever met.” “I guess we both need to mind our P’s and Q’s.” “How about, you mind them, and I won’t. When it’s all over, we will compare notes,” Crandall laughed. “You’ll probably be more right, but I’ll have more fun.” “Gee, pining for someone for sixteen years doesn’t seem like a lot of fun.” “Touché!” Then Crandall swallowed, “I sure hope our enger is asleep. Now, that’s what happens when you fall in love. Your love dies and then you are left mourning. It’s best to face life solo.” “That’s why you let Clancy cling on you. You are so full of bluster.” Landers laughed, “I really ire your grit though. You are quite the guy!” Crandall laughed, “That means a lot coming from you! Well, looks like we are getting close to Kansas. I suppose we should wake our enger and get ready for landing.”

Landers leaned over and patted her hand, “Autumn, we are landing now. Wake up.” She felt guilty pretending that she had been asleep, but thought she might embarrass the men if they knew she had overheard their private conversation. While they were on the ground, Crandall went off to talk to the airport folks while she and Landers went to the find the bathrooms. It bothered her, things had been so odd between them. She didn’t really understand what was different. However, there was no doubt about it, something had changed ever since she went to Mass that day. The rest of the flight into Corpus Christi, she stayed awake and read. Landers nodded off and Crandall listened to his music. It was late afternoon when they landed in Corpus Christi, Texas. As they were getting their things from the plane, she wondered why in the world she thought she needed to be there! What was her big plan to come down south? There was nothing that she could think of that made even the least bit of sense. Landers called a taxi to get a ride to the car rental and she stayed with the bags until he returned. Crandall came over to wait with her. “I wrote down the number of my girl Friday in the Caymans. You guys check in every day and we can work out where you need to be. Okay?” “I thought we’d either drive to Atlanta. Then we can fly back home. You don’t need to worry after us.” “Now that is borderline stupid. I have planes flying zigzag all over this country. I’m sure if you are flexible, we can get you to where you need to be.” “That isn’t necessary.” He squinted at her, “Well, Cookie. I’m not talking to you about it anymore. I’m talking to Landers. He has a good head on his shoulders.” “And I don’t?” “Yours is pretty, but you seem to be a bit the stubborn sort.” Landers ed them, “Are you two fighting?”

“He thinks that he has to fly us all over the place. I said I’ll get us tickets.” “I’ll talk to her, Crandall. We appreciate your offer and we’ll keep in touch.” Autumn gave him a dirty look and then handed him the phone numbers from Crandall, “Then you’ll need this.” “Nothing like a hard-headed woman to keep a man on his toes!” Crandall grinned, “I wish you luck, Pal. Well, it looks like I better get fueled up and meet my fishermen. I see your taxi pulling up. You let Friday know if you get into a jam.” “Okay, thanks,” Landers shook his hand. Autumn gave him a hug, “Yes, thank you.” They waved goodbye to Crandall and then put their things in the cab. Autumn got the paper out from Uncle George and gave the address of Alice’s Bed and Breakfast to the cab driver.

40-

Alice’s Bed and Breakfast was in the Rockport area, overlooking the bay. It was a huge old three-story house with surrounding verandah nestled in some large, old oak trees. It was a beautiful place and nothing either Autumn or Landers had anticipated. Autumn paid the cab driver while Landers took the bags. He took the paper from George to the desk. He signed in for their rooms and a young man came to carry their bags upstairs. The man behind the oak desk handed them two keys each for their rooms. “You are in room 21, Miss, and your room is 23, Sir. Breakfast is served from 6 to 9 in the morning. If you need anything, just call the desk by dialing 9. Have a good night.” Landers asked, “Is there a place nearby where we can get something to eat? We’ve been travelling all day.” “If you want to walk, there is a nice seafood place about two blocks south and a family restaurant across the street. A block north, is the Beef Corral. It is good, also.” The two followed the young man upstairs with their bags, while Landers carried the box. When they got to the second floor, the man walked to the end of the hall. Room 21 was on one side of the hall and Room 23 was on the other. Landers told the young man to leave the bags and said that they would sort them. He gave him a tip and the man walked away. Landers handed her one key to each room. “I’m going to give us keys to both rooms. That way, if something should happen, we can get to each other. Okay?” “Sure, at home Joey told me to keep my door unlocked, because he worries about me.” Then she looked at him with worry, “Did Joey give you those pills?” “Yes, yesterday. Don’t worry. I have them. Let’s freshen up. Then I think we should get something to eat. What do you think?” “I’d like to do that and I’m looking forward to having a walk.”

“I can help you carry your bags in.” Landers said as he headed into her room. “Do you want the box in here, or my room?” “I don’t care. I should have left it at home.” “I think Elton is right. We don’t know yet what we will need. This way, we have it, if we need it.” When he set the bags down, he said, “Knock when you are ready to go.” He had a flash of worry, “Will you be okay?” “I’ll be fine.” Autumn nodded, “I’m just a bit tired and a lot hungry.”

About twenty minutes later, she knocked on his door. He answered with a big smile, “Just in time. I think my stomach is eating itself!” She giggled, “Me, too. Have you decided where you want to eat?” “What do you say we walk the way that had two places and then see which looks best?” They went out on the verandah, “This place is gorgeous,” Landers said. “My window overlooks the garden in back. It is wonderful. I was expecting a Thrifty Nine place, so this is a real treat. I want you to know I’ll be buying dinner tonight.” “You don’t have to do that.” “Stop that. I want to.” Landers said, “I’m not a pauper.” Autumn winced, “I don’t know much about priests.” Landers stopped dead in his tracks, “Autumn, I want to be Ben, your friend. that.” “I know, but…” “We need to talk. I know I promised you that the other day but everything got away from us. I’d like to eat first, though, if you don’t mind. I really am hungry.” “Me, too.”

They decided on the family restaurant not because it looked any better than the other, but because they didn’t really want to wait for a fancy meal. They were too hungry for that. They had a good, hot dinner, but it was very welcome. Over dinner, they only talked about the flight and the airplane. Then they headed back toward Alice’s. Landers asked, “Do you want to walk on the sidewalk or down by the beach. I haven’t seen the ocean in forever.” “I think you’d like to walk on the beach.” “I guess I would,” Landers answered. “Do you mind?” “Not at all.” They turned off the sidewalk and went down the cobbled path toward the sand. There they both took off their shoes and walked in the water of the beach up to their ankles. When they got to the garden of Alice’s, they put on their shoes and walked back through the garden. Autumn was thinking they would just go in, but Landers found a nice bench by some jasmine, under a huge oak. He took her hand and sat on the bench. She sat next to him. It was a wonderful place. The air was filled with the fragrance of jasmine with the sound of the waves washing up from Rockport Bay. The temperature was balmy and the evening sky was bright. They sat in silence for a bit and he said, “Autumn, you were very right about my being upset the other day. I have to talk to you about it.” “I shouldn’t have gone to Mass without talking to you about it first. I didn’t mean to intrude on your life.” With that, he straightened and said, “You know me so well. I can’t believe that you picked up how I was feeling. I should’ve guessed though.” “I won’t do that again.” She said quietly, “I didn’t have the right and I don’t want anything be a problem between us.” “You did have the right. It was me. I’m going to say some things now, and I don’t want to upset you. I’m presuming a lot, but I need to say it for both of us.

Okay? Then, if you want me to be quiet, just say so. It isn’t fair that I put this on you with all that you have going on.” “Right now, honestly, you are more important to me than this other stuff. I don’t know I shouldn’t feel that way, but I do. I guess I never get anything right.” “How you feel about me is very important to me, also. More important than I should let it have become. That’s my responsibility.” Landers took her hand, “I became very attracted to you, in a very short time. I know that I’m almost twice your age and not free to act on it, but I care for you more than I should. At the dance, I was afraid I was going to overstep the lines. That is why I was so abrupt with you that night. It was unfair of me and I apologize.” She started to say something, but he interrupted, “Please, let me say this while I still have the courage. When I saw you at Mass, I felt that somehow I have been caught doing something wrong. I wanted to separate my life into two parts. The priest part and the Autumn part. That is neither realistic nor honest. It is also a first step to trouble. I have to confess that I shared my feelings with Vicaro that morning after Mass.” “Oh my God. What he must think of me.” “He is more understanding than you may know. I only told him about my feelings. I needed to tell him so I could keep my vows. Rest assured that I told him it was all in my mind and nothing that you did in any way. It’s not my place to speak for you.” “Is that why you didn’t come to dinner on time that day?” “No. I was needed at the Retirement Home, but it’s the reason that I avoided you later that day.” He looked in her eyes, “Autumn, I have been attracted to women before, but I’m having a much more terrible time controlling it with you. You’re about all I can think about.” “I’m sorry.” “Don’t ever be sorry for that. I enjoy doing things with you. I don’t want it to stop, but the issue is the commitment I made. I can’t just ignore it. That is the reason I talked to Vicaro.”

“What does he say?” “He is much wiser and more practical than I. When I mentioned that you might have to go to Texas, he was against me coming with you. That is why he came to the meeting the other night. I don’t know what I would have done had he not said that I should come along. I know you may think that I was a coward and would have let you down, but I honestly don’t know what I’d have done.” “I’m glad that he said you could and so you didn’t have to make that choice.” “I want to be here for you, but I also have to my place.” Landers turned her hand over and traced around her palm with his finger, “I should have probably talked to you before we left, so you could decide if you wanted to deal with me. I just couldn’t figure out when. And honestly, I wanted to be here.” She leaned against his shoulder and never said anything for a long time. Finally he asked, “What are you thinking?” “I want to be honest, too. I told Joey that I cared about you, too.” “I bet he wanted to punch me out.” “Not at all. He said that as far as he was concerned, we could be dear friends, but he only wanted me to that you had made a sacred promise. He just didn’t want me to get a broken heart because of it. He reminded me that I had to realize we would never be like other people. And then he said he respected both of us and would never say a thing to anyone.” “That is much nicer than I deserve.” “I have to say that I find myself in a very crazy situation. On one hand, I don’t know how I feel about Brad, whether I mourn him or hate him. I find it difficult to believe anyone, let alone think of a relationship with any other man ever. That will take me a while, I know that. Mostly, I don’t know how I feel about you, except that I value your friendship and don’t want to lose it. I have been around medicine enough to know all that business about transference, where patients think they are in love with their counselors or doctors. And I also know that I am vulnerable right now, because I have too many unsettled things in my life.” She sat quietly for a second, “But, I do care about you, a lot. And I know it isn’t like a romantic knight on a white steed thing, or the future of a white picket fence

and 3.1 little children.” He chuckled and she frowned, “I want you to know, I do value our friendship and I don’t want to lose it. Even though I’m not a Catholic, I do understand about promises made to God. We take them seriously too, in my faith.” “I know that, Autumn. I didn’t mean to insinuate that you didn’t.” “I know, but the whole thing does come across a bit like your promise is a big deal, and other people’s aren’t as big a deal. But I do get it. I want you to know, that I take your promise as seriously as you do, on your behalf.” Ben was shocked and very moved. He gave her a hug, and then she said into his shoulder, “This stuff was never in any of those happily ever after fairy tales I used to read when I was a little girl.” “No, I don’t imagine.” The man sat back and put his arm over her shoulder, “I know this doesn’t help, but if there was a way…. Forget it. It isn’t good to think that way. I should have sent Vicaro in my place. I shouldn’t have come here.” He withdrew his arm and sat straight up. Autumn said softly but with conviction, “Yes, you should have. You are the one that I want here. We both know the situation. You never lied about anything. If someone else thinks it’s wrong, they can go jump in a lake. They aren’t us and we aren’t doing anything wrong. Dr. Samuels said that everyone needs to have someone care about them. It’s in our DNA. I don’t believe for an instant that God, Jesus, Buddha, or Garfield would think that us caring about each other is wrong. So, that is all that really matters.” “Garfield?” he chuckled. “Yah, you know, the cartoon cat. For now, can we just keep being dear friends? We both know that I’m not in any place to make any sort of life decision. I’m definitely not in a place to think about a guy right now. I promise I’ll do my best to respect your position. You are a good priest and a fine man. I don’t want to mess it up. I only ask one thing.” “What is that?” “That you be honest with me. I give you my word, I’ll be honest with you. That is the one thing that really matters right now.”

“You have my solemn word, Autumn.” Then she hugged him and he gave her a kiss on the cheek. “We better go in before we have to have another talk.” They walked up the outside stairs to the second floor balcony and went to their rooms. As she unlocked the door, he said, “I’ll get your pill for tonight. I think Joey said that you have a pill box or something.” They sorted out how to handle the pills and then said goodnight. Even though it was bittersweet, Autumn felt better that she knew how he felt. She knew she cared for him, and at least this way, knew he cared for her, too. She was also completely aware it could ever amount to anything, and right now, that was good to know. She was almost glad about that. Boy, she really could pick them! She had been right. She certainly didn’t have a handle on this happily ever after stuff. She did change her vow, that night. “I still won’t fall for anyone like I did with Brad, but I can have a very dear friend. That is something that I very much want to do.”

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That night, Landers went to his room and put his things away. The nice looking man took out his Breviary, the book which contains the Liturgy of the Hours, which priests are required to say every day. When he finished his reading, he mediated for a while and then decided he had better get some sleep. Before he took his shower, he ed Joey’s warning to check on Autumn every night, especially when she was taking her pills. He rapped quietly on her door, but she didn’t answer. He unlocked it and went inside to call her quietly. She didn’t answer, but he looked around the dimly lit room. Their rooms were both very nice, with polished oak ing and hard wood floors and a double bed. He didn’t see her but knew she wasn’t in the bathroom because the door was open and that’s where the night light was. The quilt was folded neatly over the end bed rail and on her bed was what seemed to be a large roll of blue blanket. He was baffled by it and walked over to her bed. When he realized it was Autumn, curled up in the blue blanket like some giant blue cigar, he chuckled. He ed that Joey had warned him that she did that. ‘A couple times, I thought she had disappeared, until I looked in her shroud. She darned near choked to death one night in it with those pills. You have to check her. She could suffocate, especially if she has herself in a frantic state.’ Landers leaned over the blue cigar and then noticed that her hair was sticking out of the top. He listened and she seemed to be sleeping fine. Then he grinned. He thought to himself, ‘She is the oldest young person, wisest dumb person, and most sensible flakey person I have ever encountered. God gave me a wonderful treasure when He brought her into my life. I hope I can treat her with the goodness and respect she deserves.’ Then he stepped back and noticed that she had the photo of Clarence with the blue ribbon propped up by her lamp on the bedside table. He smiled at her and tenderly whispered, “Sleep well, Autumn.” He locked her door, went back to his room to take his shower. Once in bed, he

tried to think of what they needed to do the next day and where to start. He was very thankful the trip had gone this well so far. He had been afraid to talk to her about their situation but found it easier to do than he had imagined. He was thankful she seemed to understand and appreciate the situation fully. Their talk seemed to bring relief to both of them to have it out in the open. He really had worried about that. He pulled one pillow under the other and turned over on his side. When he did that, he pulled the blanket up over his shoulder. Suddenly he had to laugh. “I wonder if that is how she started rolling up like that?”

In the morning, he woke when a noisy bird was squabbling with another over a nest by his window. He looked out and noticed it was a bright, clear day. It was just six-fifteen. He went back to straighten his blankets and the phone rang. He jumped, before he answered it, “Good morning.” “Hello. How is everything?” Father Vicaro asked. “Very good. We arrived without a hitch and George got us some very nice rooms at a Bed and Breakfast by Rockport Bay. It was late by the time we got in, so we didn’t get anything done last night.” “Didn’t expect that you would.” “Frank, I talked to Autumn last night after we had supper. She is very realistic about our relationship and understands my commitment is to the Church. She still wants to be friends and I told her that we would be. I really want her in my life as much as she can be.” “That’s good, very good. Landers, you know in your heart that you must be careful. I’m glad that she does, too. Right now isn’t the time, but I want you to to be careful to give her enough freedom to choose another when the time comes. She has to have the right to do that. She is respecting your choice, so that is the least you can do.” “I know. At this point, she is still struggling to give up her hatred for Brad’s betrayal. You know, Frank, I think that man was more than a philanderer. I think he was likely a cold-blooded murderer.”

“That is my thought and I know George feels that way. He shared with me today more of the things in the box led him to believe that there were other women. He just didn’t want to spring it on her the other night.” “I’m not a bit surprised.” “Help her get past this. You need to give her a chance for a full life. Once she gets her feet on solid ground again, she may not be as attached to you.” “I know, Frank. I’ll keep that in mind.” “In spite of the fact that things are in such a state for her, I think she is very sensible. More than many who are a lot older. But then, she is Alma and George’s niece. I wouldn’t expect much different.” “That’s true,” Landers agreed. “So, have you decided what you are going to do today?” “No. I just got up and I thought I would get dressed and then give her a call. They have a breakfast buffet on this gorgeous lanai downstairs. You wouldn’t believe this place. It is set back from the bay and the rustic three-story home is surrounded by ancient Oak trees and fragrant plants.” “Sounds fantastic, but , you have serious work to do.” “Oh, I do, and so does she. The forecast is for 101° today and the humidity is already brutal. I was thinking we probably might want to start at the library.” “Library?” “Yes, to find the newspaper from around the time of Brad’s marriage.” “Or the newspaper office?” “Makes sense, Spymaster.” Landers laughed, “My guess is that you have already had your coffee.” “I’m on my third cup!” Frank Vicaro laughed, “I’ll let you go, so you can get yours. You don’t do well without it.”

Landers dressed and was about to pick up the phone to call Autumn when it rang again. “Good morning,” he said. “Good morning. Are you ready for breakfast? I have to go down there and get some coffee! Immediately! ! It is a medical emergency!” Autumn giggled. He chuckled, “Me, too. Meet you in the hall.” They went out onto the lanai and found a nice round table near some flowering bushes. The waitress brought ice water and then told them to go help themselves to the buffet and she would bring their coffee. They walked over to the buffet and made their choices. There were so many good things, that they had a difficult time deciding. As they were debating over chicken-fried steak strips or ham slices to go with their biscuits and gravy, Autumn leaned toward him, “I think we should call Uncle George back and tell him we are staying until we taste everything on the buffet at least once.” Lander chuckled, “We’d have to be here until Christmas.” “I know, huh?” “When did you talk to him?” “I called them this morning like they had asked. I called you first, but your line was busy. I thought maybe the receiver was off the hook or something. So I was going to talk to them and then if you didn’t answer, I was going to break into your room and see if you were okay!” “Why would you think that I wouldn’t be?” “Because I have been hanging around Joey! You know, he is always checking on me!” He watched her as she chatted away, happily babbling about what was going on at home. In fact, she looked very nice that morning, dressed in linen slacks, a white cotton top and sandals. She was fresh and pretty. He noticed her hair was back from her face, but falling in gentle curls down her back. He wondered how she could get her hair to do that after it had been wrapped so tightly all night.

She became quiet and looked at him, “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” He grimaced, “I was wondering how you got your hair to look so nice.” “What do you mean?” she frowned. “Why wouldn’t it?” “I went in to check on you last night, like Joey suggested. You were sleeping all wrapped up as tightly as a cigar in your blue blanket. If I did that, my hair would be sticking straight up this morning.” She shook her head in despair, “You guys. You don’t need to check on my like a three-year old… and then give me the business about my sleeping! I like to feel safe, toasty, and comfortable wrapped in my blankets. You just don’t know how to sleep.” “I guess not. Never saw it done that way before, I must say.” “Well, try it. You may learn something.” “Can’t.” “Why not?” “It will mess up my hair.” She crossed her eyes and giggled, “I just knew you’d be difficult. So, what do you think we should do first?” “It depends on what you want to find out. I was thinking that we should check the newspaper from the time of the wedding and then get an idea of where to go from there. What do you say?” “I thought of that. We’ll ask what the local paper is and go from there.” Landers said, “The first thing I want to do is rent a car.” “Uncle George gave me his credit card to do that.” “No,” Landers said definitely, “He is paying for the room. I’ll get it in my name. That is one advantage to being older. I get a better rate.”

“I’m a good driver.” “I know you are,” he sensed she was hurt by that and added, “Okay, we’ll list both of our names as drivers, but it’ll be in my name.” “That’s fine, because at the end of our stay here and when we take the car back I’m paying for all this with my money, so it won’t be on anyone’s card.” “You don’t need to do that.” “I want to find a jewelry shop and sell that damned engagement ring Brad gave me. We will spend that. It’s his actions that put us all out, so he should pay for the damages.” “Are you certain you want to do that?” “I have never been more certain of anything! I also think that I want to return that emerald ring to Olivia’s family. They should have the money from that.” Landers watched her speak with determination, “I see you have given this a lot of thought.” “I’m not the emotional knothead you think I am,” she winked. “I never thought you were.” Then he scrunched his face, “I have to correct that. When you were calling me every filthy thing you ever heard, I thought you were. Where did you learn all that?” “Study. Intense study.” She got serious, “I don’t suppose you hear that talk much? From nuns and such.” “Not so you would notice!” He chuckled, “But , I worked in an addiction center. I heard all kinds of stuff.” “Was I that bad?” she was shocked. “No,” he grinned, “But with more of that intense study, you could get right in there with the best of them!” “I’m not sure this is going to work. We have to hang out for how many days?”

“I don’t think that either of us know.” Then she fell silent for a while before she spoke again, “Everyone put themselves out for me and I feel like I’m expected to be miserable and working at this mess every minute.” He answered quietly but seriously, “You need to relax, too. You can’t spend all your time mired in this. No one would expect that and it wouldn’t be good for you.” “Ben, I’m counting on you to keep me on track. You know how I love to run away from stuff.” “You’ll do fine,” he groaned. “Well, I think I ate enough to last me awhile. How about you?” “Oh, I am stuffed. Now, I should take a nap.” “No way. We have to get moving.”

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The man at the front desk told them they had an arrangement with a car rental company, if they were interested. The rental company would deliver the car to Alice’s. Landers called them while Autumn asked about the local newspaper and if there was a reputable jeweler nearby. They went out on the verandah and sat on the rocking chairs to wait. While they were rocking, Autumn started to giggled. “We’re like two old fogeys!” Landers chuckled and said in a creaky voice, “Why yes Granny, back in 1891…” They were both laughing when the rental car arrived. The man was very helpful and took them back to their office to sign the papers. He also gave them a map and pointed out the best ways to get where they needed to be. Minutes later, they were in the blue Chevy Biscayne with Landers behind the wheel and Autumn riding shotgun. They studied the map before taking off and then decided on the best route. Autumn asked Landers to remind her to get postcards for the Grey Hawks. “I was thinking of that myself. What day is this, anyway? I’ve lost track already!” “It is Wednesday.” She smiled and then once he started to drive she said, “Ben? How long do you think we will be gone?” “I think we’ll know more after today. Right now, it is anyone’s guess.” She nodded, “Well, I’m going to enjoy my time with you. It is kinda nice it just being us. I don’t have to worry about what to call you.” “You can always call me Ben, you know.” “I don’t think so. I let it slip once around others and got funny looks. No else one calls you that. They call you Landers or Father Landers.”

“Except Sister, who calls me Fatty Landers! Could you talk to her?” “I’ll put it on my list,” Autumn giggled. “I think you are just right. Bart is skinny and of course, Vicaro looks good as the older Italian Pasta eater he is.” They only got lost once, before they found the jeweler that everyone recommended. Before they got out of the car, Landers grabbed her hand, “Are you completely certain you want to do this?” “Very. I hate the ring. Brad said he spent $17,000 on it! I could pay for all this mess with it and pay Joey back for Dr. Samuels visits. I want to do this.” “I don’t want you to regret it later.” “Ben, of all the things I may regret, selling this thing won’t be one!” They went inside and asked to speak to the manager. The man was very professional in a grandfatherly way. He ushered them into his office and told them to have a sit. Autumn told him that she had this engagement ring and that the man that gave it to her had married someone else. She felt a little bad about the lie and looked at Landers. He never flinched. The man looked at it with his jeweler’s loupe while she told him that her fiancé had told her that he paid $17,000 for it. “I realize that I won’t get that much, but I need to know what you think it is worth.” The man studied it carefully and moved the lamp to afford more light. Then he shook his head and handed it back to her. “I’m terribly sorry, but if he paid that much for it, somebody saw him coming.” Autumn took the ring in her hand and started to tear up, “How much?” “The diamond is a quality paste, but the gold in the band is valuable. It is worth about $500.” The man shook his head, “I’m terribly sorry.” She just looked at the ring and the tears silently rolled down her cheeks and mumbled quietly, “I shouldn’t be surprised. He lied about everything else.” Landers watched her a minute, “What do you want to do, Autumn?”

“Sell the damned thing.” “What will you do with it, since it’s fake?” Landers asked the jeweler. “I will reset it with a good diamond. Then I could maybe sell it for $3500 to $4000 top end. The setting isn’t made to hold a large stone. If you folks want me to reset it for you, I can do it for about $2700.” “Autumn?” “I don’t want it around. Sell it.” She handed it to Landers and then asked the jeweler, “Where is your restroom?” The man told her and she dashed out of the office. Landers watched to make sure she wasn’t going to sprint on him. When he was satisfied that she went into the restroom, he looked back at the man, “This has been very hard on her.” “You know. I see the joy that some rings bring and I also see the other side. I wish things weren’t that way. What is her name so I can write her a check? We don’t buy for cash.” Landers told him and while the man wrote out the check, Landers stepped into the hallway and waited for her. When she came out of the restroom, he was there. She gave him a dirty look, “Afraid I would run?” “It did cross my mind. You okay?” “Yes,” she nodded. “God. I’m so thankful that I never married him.” “The jeweler is writing out the check.” They went back in the office and she apologized for leaving like that. “Not a problem. I’m sorry I can’t justify paying you more. I recalculated and I made it for $600.” He handed her the check and then shook her hand. “I’m so very sorry I can’t do better.” “That was so kind. Thank you.” Landers shook his hand. When they got back in the car, Autumn said, “I feel like a major idiot. Do you

think that man was telling the truth?” “Yes, he was recommended by both Alice’s and the Rental Company. He also is a member of the Better Business Bureau, Jewelers of America, and the Chamber of Commerce. I might have worried more if I felt that Brad had a stellar reputation, but we both know he didn’t.” “I know. I have to say that I wondered how he saved up that much. He gave me a big line about how he had earned some of it while he worked at that camp in Iowa last summer and the rest was from some trust his Grandmother had set up.” She sighed, “I felt so good this morning. Now, I feel like the dregs of a slop pail.” Landers gave her a hug, “Let’s try to get that happy back. When you get your money, you better put that money away in a safe place.” “I want you to keep half in your wallet and I will keep the other half.” “No.” “I’m not giving it to you. I just want you to keep it. That way, if one of us loses it, the other still has half. Okay?” “I guess that is a good idea, especially coming from someone who sleeps like a blue cigar!” She rolled her eyes and grumped, “Just find a branch of this bank so I can cash the check, Father Hotshot!” He made a face, “I think there is a sin thing about that.” “Which one?” She squinted. “I don’t know. I’m thinking.” They had quite a time cashing the check, since they were both from out of state. At first, the bank insisted that Landers co-endorse it. Then to make things worse, Landers identification said he was a priest, but he wasn’t wearing his clerical collar. When the bank asked for the car title, but it was rented and neither had a return airline ticket. Finally, the manager called the bank in Merton and they

verified that Father Landers was who he said he was and had excellent credit. Autumn Simms was indeed a resident of North Dakota and they had traveled to Texas to take care of some personal business. The local banker was then very confident that it was legit and commented, “That Mrs. Schroeder was very helpful.” When they got in the car, Landers groaned, “We could have robbed the place with less rigmarole!” “I’m glad Mrs. Schroeder didn’t say I’m her cousin!” Autumn giggled. Landers grinned, “Ye gads. We would’ve been in the slammer.”

Their next stop was the newspaper office. They were set them up in a room with a microfiche, to study the old newspapers on microfilm. When the wedding date was entered, the article about the wedding of Brad and Olivia popped up. They had a magnificent wedding, but the information about Brad was interesting. It stated he was a schoolteacher in Atlanta. There was no mention of his hometown, family, or any of his friends. All of the wedding party had Olivia’s last name or were unknown to Autumn. The couple left for their honeymoon on in the Bay area of Corpus Christi immediately after the gala reception at one of Corpus Christi’s finer establishments. Autumn frowned at Ben and shook her head. He asked quietly, “Are you handling this okay- I mean, reading about the wedding?” “That isn’t what’s bothering me. I mean I’m glad we found her parent’s address, but for some reason I feel we didn’t find what I needed. I was surprised that no one in his family seemed to be in attendance. I know Mrs. Vander Vorst would’ve been all over it.” “I doubt they even knew about it.” Landers shrugged, “What do you think you need to find?” “I don’t know. I guess.. just something.” While they discussed how Brad’s family would take the news of his marriage, Landers kept scrolling through the newspapers unconsciously. As he scrolled the

paper five days after the wedding, the headline caught Autumn’s eye. She grabbed his hand and gasped, “Look!” There was a headline, Tragic Honeymoon Drowning. Ben and Autumn read the articles carefully. The articles revealed that the newly married couple, Brad and Olivia Vander Vorst had gone on a day fishing cruise aboard the Bailey’s Starfish, a local charter. When they were several miles off shore, there was a tragic accident. Olivia fell overboard. A search had been initiated, but her body had not been found yet. The preliminary investigation revealed nothing more than a tragic accident, although final results were still pending. Ben and Autumn were both in shock, but kept looking until they found all the information they glean. It was nearly a month later when Olivia’s body was found and at that point the autopsy could prove very little. The death was declared accidental, and her body was released for burial. The funeral was held over St. Patrick’s weekend. There was a photo of Brad with presumably her parents standing graveside. None of his family was in any of the photos. Autumn was emotionally drained at that point, but so was Ben. The woman offered to copy the articles for them and they debated. Then Autumn said, “I want it copied. I might need it, who knows. Do you think that is silly?” “No,” Landers said. “I think it is a good idea. We can look it over again that way and have something to show your family.” While the lady made the copies, Landers said, “I don’t know about you, but I’m worn out.” “Me, too.” “Let’s grab a bite to eat on the wharf and pick out postcards for the kids.”

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They drove to the waterfront and parked the car, carefully putting the folder of the copies under the seat. They walked through the shops and found one with many postcards. They ended up buying one for almost everyone they knew. They were beginning to relax when they took their bag of cards into The Crab Claw, a small restaurant that overlooked the marina. They sat across from each other at a nice table on the patio, studied the menu, and were looking over the cards they’d purchased, when Autumn noticed a fishing charter boat docking by a pier just to their left. Her face fell and she turned pale and shaky. She gasped, “That’s the one. Bailey’s Starfish! That’s the one!.” Landers noticed her demeanor and grabbed her hand, “Are you going to be okay? Do you want to leave?” She put her hands on her forehead trying to stop the dizziness as the waiter returned, “Is the lady okay?” Landers nodded, “I think so. Could you give us a minute?” “Of course, sir. If you need anything, I’ll be over there. Just wave,” the young man said. “Thank you,” Landers said and then asked, “Do you want to leave?” She shook her head no, “I wanted to have a nice lunch. I’ll be okay. I need a deep breath. Why is that bothering me so much?” Landers moved into the chair next to her and put his arm around her. He said softly, “Seeing the boat makes it real. We can leave. We don’t need to eat.” She shook her head and swore quietly, “Damn it anyway. I don’t want to let him ruin another day of my life.”

“Look Autumn, it isn’t necessary to prove anything. It’s only me.” She looked at him through welled up tears, “Alma said to I’m her shotgun-toting moonshiner kin. We’uns don’t weaken at a trifle.” Landers gave her a squeeze, “Okay, then take a deep breath, buckle down, and get your grit.” She looked at him and giggled, “You’re such a sweetheart.” “I know. Too bad that Vicaro doesn’t appreciate me. What did he say? I get on his nerves?” “He is a character, but I can see where he might have a point.” Landers moved back to his seat and without having to wave, the young waiter came back over. They ordered and then decided to write out the cards while they waited for their meals. They ignored the boat, but neither forgot it was there. An hour later, they had finished their crab salad and shared a chocolate mousse. When they left, Autumn grabbed his hand, “I’d like to go talk to the men on the boat.” He studied her, “Do you think that is a good idea? Can you handle it?” “Yes. We came down here to find out what happened. I think that boat docking was a sign that I need to do this. Gee, Ben. I’m here and I should find out!” He studied her for a minute, “Okay. I want you to know that the minute something begins to go awry, I’m taking you out of there. Deal?” “Yes. What should I say to them?” “Maybe you should tell the truth, not every detail, but enough so they understand. That is usually the best policy. Like you did at the jewelers.” “I wasn’t completely honest with him.” “He didn’t need to know every detail. What you said was the truth.” Landers shrugged, “I know it sounds duplicitous, but being honest doesn’t require that we

give everyone a complete detailed .” She smiled, “Boy, you guys really have all angles covered, don’t you?” He stopped walking and paled, “You don’t really think that, do you?” She took his hand and she was afraid that she had ruined things, “No. I was trying to give you the business.” He stood a minute, before he said, seriously, “I can see where you might think that I’m pulling a fast one… that I just want my cake and eat it, too.” Autumn chuckled softly, “Of course, you do. We all do! But I know you’re being honest with me. You and Joey always tell me I want the ice cream and not the root canals.” “Please know, Autumn, I’d never lie to you.” She answered earnestly, “I do, Ben.” He thought a minute before he nodded, “Okay. Let’s do this.”

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The couple walked down to the dock where the 1970 Bertram Flybridge sports fishing boat was tied and being cleaned by its small crew. They watched one older man and two younger men scrubbing down Bailey’s Starfish. They watched for a few minutes and one of the younger men looked over at them. He said something to the older man, who came off the boat to where they were standing. The wind and sunburned man came forward and held out his hand with a friendly smile, “Howdy folks. Can I help you with anything? Looking to go out and catch the big one?” Lander shook his hand and said, “No, but we’d like to talk to you, if at all possible. We are searching for information.” The man stepped back, “Are you with the press?” “No.” Landers said, as he reached for his wallet and handed his identification to the boat’s captain. He didn’t want a rerun of the bank’s questions. The man pushed his cap back on his head and studied the ID card, “Okay? Don’t know what I would possible know that’d help the Catholic church, but fire away. I’m ready for a sit at any rate.” “I’m Father Landers, a Roman Catholic priest from Merton, North Dakota and this is my friend, Autumn Sims. She was recently engaged to marry a man from Georgia. He died in a tragic car accident in Atlanta days before their wedding.” The man nodded to Autumn, “My sympathies, Miss.” Then he motioned to some boxes and took a seat on one. He yelled out toward the boys, “Bring us a soft drink. You folks good with Cola?” “That’d be nice.”

“Good.” He nodded, “My name’s Fred Bailey, but call me Fred. This is my little hole in the ocean and the boys on the boat are my kin. One is my son and other my nephew. They’re the good sort who haven’t shamed me too often.” The younger of the boys brought them the Cokes and smiled as Fred introduced him. “This one is my sister’s kid, Bobby Joe.” They exchanged smiles and the teenager went back to his work. Fred took a swig from his bottle and asked, “So, of what help could I be to you, Father? I have to tell you right off, I don’t cotton much to any church, but the wife is Roman Catholic. So, if I value my life, I’ll do my best to give you a hand.” “I appreciate your candor, Fred,” Landers smiled, “Autumn has been facing some struggles and unease dealing with the death of her fiancé. She recently received a box of his personal things from his family. When she looked through it, she found that he apparently had married here in Corpus Christi. She didn’t know anything about it. Since she also discovered several more discrepancies in what he had told her, she needs to find some answers.” The older man wiped his forehead with a large cloth handkerchief, “So, where do I fit in?” “We came here to find out if he still has a wife. While we were investigating, we discovered that they had finished their honeymoon with a fishing trip on your vessel, the Starfish. It opened more questions about if and how his wife may have died.” The man straightened up, “Would you be talking of Olivia Vander Vorst?” Landers nodded. “Let me call the boys over. It was the five of us on that Starfish that day. I know they’ll want to hear about this.” The boys came over and Fred explained their discussion. “Ladd has some very strong feelings on this issue and was quite upset with the police decision.” The six-foot three, muscular, fair-haired fellow with snapping black eyes made a face, “That bastard murdered that sweet little thing as sure as there are clouds in the sky! How he managed to waltz away from it without a slap on the wrist gives

me nightmares to this day!” Autumn gasped sharply and the tears started to roll. Landers took her hand, “You okay?” She pursed her lips and nodded, but anyone could see she was about to lose control. All the men watched her a minute, as she struggled to breathe evenly again. Then after a couple minutes, she said, “I can’t say that surprises me, but may I ask why you feel so certain?” The shirtless man apologized, “I’m sorry, little miss. I should learn to temper my outbursts.” Autumn said softly, “Not to worry. You should’ve heard me when I discovered some of these things.” The young man watched her, “I don’t mean to upset you but I didn’t like him from the word go. He was one of those privileged, spoiled young guys who thought that the world owed him simply because he was born.” Fred frowned disapprovingly, “That doesn’t explain why you’re so sure that he murdered her. These folks need facts.” “I know. Sorry,” Ladd continued. “There aren’t really facts. First, the whole thing made no sense. I talked to him first on the phone and he asked all about the configuration of the Flybridge and our fishing procedure with more detail than most folks. He asked if folks dived from it, seemed quite knowledgeable, and I was expecting him to ask if they could dive. Then he said they’d think it over and his fiancée would be calling to settle the payment. I thought that was a strange thing for a man to pull on his honeymoon, but folks handle money all sorts of ways.” Fred interjected, “It only aroused suspicion after the fact.” Ladd continued, “When they came that day, it was obvious that she was terrified of the water. She put the life vest on just to walk down the dock! That made it even more of strange choice for a honeymoon. When they boarded, she stayed at least two feet back from the edge of the boat. She seemed to me to be trying to be a good sport, but wasn’t enjoying any of it. He was almost giddy.”

Landers frowned, “Does seem odd, as you say.” “It was a beautiful still day, one of the nicest fishing days of the year,” Fred stated. “We went out past San Padre into the big water and had a good day on the water. We fished nearly six hours. The young woman never went near the edge of the boat and didn’t fish. Mostly she was trying not act terrified while he fished. When we had our limit and I told the couple we were going to head back. Bobby Joe went below to clean their catch and pack it in ice while Ladd went to get their lunch ready. At that point, Vander Vorst kept goading his wife to go closer to the edge of the boat. One time I told him he should back off. He gave me a threatening look. I knew he was angry that I interfered, and was not someone to mess with.” Bobby Joe asserted, “Uncle Fred went topside to turn the Starfish about and Ladd had gone up front to put their lunch out. I went down below to ice pack their fish. Vander Vorst was giving her grief about being brave and taking off her life vest. Before I went below, I stated that it was bad policy to be without her life vest. He gave me an icy glare and I skedaddled.” The nineteen-year old dropped his shoulders, “I should never have left them alone. I think of it every day. I might have saved her.” Fred interrupted, “I had just turned the Starfish, when I heard the ruckus.” “I heard a noise, like a scuffle, and came up to see what was going on.” The teen continued, “She had gone over. I yelled, ‘Man overboard!’ and Ladd came right away. Uncle Fred cut the engines. I ran to the edge and she was floating away. Her life jacket was on the floor of the Starfish! He was just standing there with this sickening look on his face, dead of feelings, not even moving. I ran to grab the life float.” Ladd began, “When I got there, Vander Vorst had grabbed a gaffing pole and looked like he was whacking at her. I grabbed it out of his hand and asked him what the hell he was doing. He gave me the most chilling glare I’ve ever seen. I still have nightmares about it. Then he nearly smiled, ‘Trying to reach my Sugar Bear.’ I damned near throttled him. I told him he couldn’t catch her with a gaffing hook. It would only hurt her. I grabbed it from him and by then, Bobby Joe had tossed the life preserver out. She beginning to sink when we saw some blood in the water.”

“Blood?” Landers asked. “Yah, it wasn’t there when I first saw her,” Bobby Joe stated, “When I turned back with the life float, there was some. I think it was from the gaffing hook, but I don’t know. She never even tried to reach for the life preserver. She was under before Ladd went in to get her. Uncle Fred had radioed in and then he came down to help. He and I lowered the dingy and I went out with Ladd. We couldn’t even find her.” Fred wiped his face again with his handkerchief, “I had to push that Vander Vorst aside. He was just standing there in the way, totally without emotion. Never saw behavior like his. He was almost obstructing us helping her!” Landers listened, “What did the investigators say when you told them?” Ladd shook his head, “I don’t know what they were thinking. When they asked him why he didn’t try to save her, he said he didn’t know how to swim. He told them that she was going to be brave and take off the life jacket. Just as the boat turned, she went over because she was standing too close to the edge. He claimed he didn’t know that you couldn’t use a gaffing pole to rescue her. He said he thought he could snag her clothing on it and bring her back in.” Bobby Joe straightened, “Personally, I think he was trying to knock her unconscious. There is no way in hell, she took off the life vest willingly! I’m convinced of that!” “Me, too.” Ladd agreed, “He intended to kill her. The only time he even acted upset, was when he was being questioned. I don’t know how he squirmed out of it, but you should talk to the police. He needs to be put away.” Fred said, “These folks said he died in a car crash a couple months ago.” “Oh,” Ladd became silent a minute and then said, “Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. I know I shouldn’t say it, but I hope he went to hell.” “Here is the card of Detective Owens,” the teen offered the card from his wallet. “That is the guy who handled the case. He can tell you more. If you need me to tell anybody anything, I’ll do it. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t blame myself for leaving them alone.”

Landers patted the young man’s arm, “It wasn’t your fault. You did the best you could.” “Maybe,” the teen shrugged, “But it still wasn’t enough.” Ladd reiterated, “I’m glad he is dead. At least he can’t kill anyone else. I know damned well that he did it -intentionally.” Autumn had not said a word in some time. She had shook hands with the men and mumbled a thank you as they left. She walked back to their car, but never said anything to Landers. Back in the car, Landers looked at her with concern, “Are you okay, Autumn? Do you want to go back to Alice’s or to the police?” She shrugged. He studied her, “You have to tell me. How much can you handle?” She sat, dejected, withdrawn and pale, for a few minutes, “The police.” He considered the options and then said, “I suppose we might as well.”

45-

A few minutes later, the couple was at the desk of the police station asking for Detective Owens. They waited a few minutes until the man in white shirtsleeves came out to greet them. After introductions and a brief description of their case, he invited them back to his office. The balding detective offered them each some cold water and then sat behind his messy desk. Behind him was a window with horizontal blinds that over looked the grass surrounding the station, an Umbrella Tree, and the parking lot. The couple sat in some metal chairs with gray cushions that were surprisingly comfortable, even though it was sticky and confined in the room. Owens reached over to the top of a metal credenza to the side of his desk, “Mind if I turn on this fan? Our air conditioner picked today to go on the fritz. It’s like a subterranean hot springs in here. Too bad I don’t have somebody to interrogate. I think after half hour, I could get a confession for the Crucifixion with the offer of a cool breeze.” Landers smiled, but Autumn simply listened as she stared at her paper water cup. Detective Owens studied her briefly and then turned to Father Landers. “What can I do to help you folks?” Landers briefly explained the situation and what they had done that day. Owens was very attentive and asked a few questions for clarification. When Landers finished, Owens asked what exactly they were searching for during their quest. Landers reached out to touch Autumn’s elbow, “Autumn? Could you tell Detective Owens what answers you need?” She shrugged slightly and then looked directly at the detective for the first time, “I don’t really know. At first, I had to know if he had really been married and if his wife was still here. I couldn’t imagine how he planned on getting a marriage license with me if he was married.” Owens shook his head, “Sadly, easier than you might expect. There is more background check to buying a Ford than to getting married. Depends if honesty

means anything to you. But in his case, he was single- widowed to be precise.” The man pulled his shirt front out from his body and shook the stickiness out of it, “May I ask what made you question his intentions at all?” Autumn explained about Camille and Jake. She never said that Jake had called her that day. She told the Detective about the car accident, but nothing about the green car. Autumn explained she went to North Dakota to start over. Then she received that box from Vander Vorsts. She started to tear up and had difficulty talking, so Landers explained the rest of it. Owens took it all in and shook his head several times. “We always were uncomfortable with the way this case ended. I was worried that Ladd Bailey or Ray Jerriman would take matters in their own hands. Neither were satisfied with the outcome.” “Ray Jerriman?” Landers asked. “Olivia’s brother. He’s a fiery bastard and wanted to string Vander Vorst up from the beginning. I was glad when Vander Vorst went back to work in Atlanta, so we didn’t a have a lynching. When he came out for the funeral over St. Patrick’s day, we had to put a man on Ray to keep him under wraps. I couldn’t wait for Vander Vorst to go back under his rock in Atlanta. Ray kept his mouth flapping for a couple months, until he got his new Corvette in mid-May. Then he took a road trip, I think to New Orleans. He was gone about a week and after that, he finally shut up. Before then, he must have been in our office at least once a week or writing editorials! He was convinced his sister was murdered.” “Didn’t he feel that the investigation was adequate?” “No, inadequate would have been a step up from his description. We wanted to nail Vander Vorst, too, but there was nothing to convict. The DA wanted to charge Vander Vorst so bad he could taste it, but it’s difficult to do with nothing but folks’ opinions. Olivia’s body washed up down the coast weeks after she went in and it was badly decomposed and had been batter by scavengers and wave motion. The coroner concluded that the injuries were consistent with someone going overboard, but nothing to prove how she went overboard. Vander Vorst was only alone with her for a couple minutes, which isn’t long, but long enough to flip someone off a boat. Ladd and Bobby Joe both thought he was hitting her with the gaffing rod, but didn’t actually see him do it. Some of her

injuries could have been from the being hit with a gaffing hook, or from being banged up on a rocky shore. Vander Vorst said he thought he could catch her and pull her out. Since he didn’t know how to swim, he didn’t know what else to do. Who can say if he thought he was helping?” “He did so!” Autumn almost shouted. “He had his Red Cross Lifesaver Certificate! He even did lifeguard work at the local pool! That’s how he got that job with the children’s camp in Iowa last year!” “You mean Oregon?” Owens asked. “No, Iowa. He went up there last summer. I was in hospital rotation, so I was at college, but he went off to work at this church summer camp.” Owens raised his eyebrow, “Are you certain it was Iowa?” “Yah,” she nodded, “Because it was near to Toledo and that’s Iowa, right?” “Ohio,” Landers corrected. “Oh,” Autumn shook her head, “I always mix that up. But we only talked on the phone once a week, so I didn’t ever see his address or anything. Sorry, Detective, it was probably Ohio.” Owens pursed his lips, “It wasn’t Ohio, either. There is a Toledo, Oregon. We did a background on him and found his only brush with the law, besides speeding tickets, was while he was out there. Seems he and some of the other young counselors at the camp went rock climbing between Toledo and Elk City, Oregon. The records showed that he was a camp cook, but nothing about swimming.” Autumn frowned, “I wonder why he never mentioned that. I didn’t know he even knew how to cook. He was such a miserable liar.” Owens leaned back in his chair, “We thought we had something when we found out about the accident in Oregon, but it didn’t pan out.” Landers crinkled his eyebrow, “What happened in Oregon, if I may ask?” “There were about seven of these young counselors who had some free time

toward the end of the summer. They decided to camp out and go rock climbing by the Yaquina River. I guess it rained a lot that weekend, and Vander Vorst, his girlfriend, Patty, and a few others wanted to climb anyway. They were cliff climbing when Patty lost her footing and fell to her death at the bottom of a ravine. He was questioned, but never charged with anything. No one was. It was signed off as a tragic accident.” “My God,” Autumn almost ed out. Owens continued, “We called the folks in Oregon, they said that it was a combination of loose rock and rainy conditions. It was ruled as an accident.” Landers flattened his lips and squinted, “I’m afraid I don’t believe it.” “I didn’t either, but what can you do? One of the detectives from there said that other than one of this Patty’s friends, they all thought Brad was a great guy and it was a complete accident.” “What did Patty’s friend think?” “She said that Patty had found out that she was pregnant and Brad was less than happy about it. The autopsy proved she was about six weeks pregnant, but that doesn’t prove anything. Or even if it was his child.” Owens leaned forward again, “Between you and me, I was convinced he probably killed both women, or that maybe Patty’s death was an accident and that gave him a good idea to off Olivia. We never had any evidence to reopen the case. There was little point in doing more, especially since Ray had finally shut up about it. It wasn’t like there was a lot of property or money involved with her death.” “Except the insurance money,” Landers offered. “What insurance money?” The detective sat straight up, “We had checked and there was no life insurance policy on Olivia except the ones her parents had. The couple had been married, so likely didn’t have time to get life insurance. Her parents paid for her burial with it. As far as we knew, there was no financial gain to him.” “Autumn’s uncle found a receipt from Olivia’s insurance company for her change in beneficiary in that box of stuff. He received about $135,000.” Ben explained, “Apparently, she had changed the policy right before the wedding to

make him the beneficiary.” “I’d sure love to see that,” Owens said. “Too bad you don’t have that here.” “We do,” Autumn said, “I brought the box. It is at the Bed and Breakfast.” Owens asked, “I don’t suppose I could ask to see it?” “Certainly,” Landers said. “We can bring it over tomorrow morning, right?” “Yes. You can keep everything in it, except there is an emerald ring that seems rather expensive. It says ‘from Olivia’ on the back, and I think her family should have it.” Autumn looked at Detective Owens, “Do you think you could give it to them?” “I can do that. That is kind of you to want to give it to them. At the very least, that man damaged many souls in his short years on this planet.” Owens bit on his pen, “You know, it is horrible to say, but that car accident likely saved your life, Miss Simms.” “I know,” Autumn answered, barely above a whisper. “I just want this over with. Can we go, Ben?” Landers nodded, “Unless Detective Owens needs anything?” “No. Thanks for coming forward. If you could stop by tomorrow morning with the box, I’d appreciate it. I will call Jerrimans and tell them to pick up the ring. It’s too bad that we couldn’t get enough conclusive evidence in time, but I guess it is all over now.” Owens grimaced, “Sometimes I’d like to take a more aggressive approach, but that isn’t always possible.” Back in the car, Autumn was very quiet. Landers asked her if she wanted to get supper before they went back to Alice’s or change and go out later. She mumbled, “I’m not in the least hungry. I want to go back to Alice’s, take a handful of pills, and go to sleep.” “Nice try.” Landers squeezed her hand, “You aren’t getting your mitts on the pills and Samuels said that you can’t take that stronger one on an empty stomach!”

“You are as much fun as an appendectomy.” He smiled at her, “Aren’t I just?”

46-

Back at Alice’s, Autumn went to her room to take a shower. Landers went to his room and called Crandall. He was fortunate to catch him actually in his office on the Caymans. “Well, as I live and breathe! I was just thinking about you!” “Good stuff, I hope.” “Not really. I was just wondering how our little girl was doing with you as her seeing eye dog.” “Oh Crandall, you have no idea what all we uncovered. That Brad was really a piece of work! Honestly, Autumn is lucky that she didn’t marry him. She would likely have been murdered.” “Isn’t that a bit extreme?” “Afraid not,” Landers answered, “As far as we can tell, there were three women that died at his hand, directly or not.” “Holy hell!” Crandall gasped, “How is the girl doing?” “She is still trying to keep going, but it’s a struggle. I feel so badly for her, but there is nothing she can do about any of it— except live through it. We have a meeting with the police department again tomorrow morning and then I think we need to head out. If you can’t be here, I think I’ll just drive to Atlanta, or actually Dannonville, so she can see her parents. My prayer is visiting with them will help.” “I won’t be there, but one of my pilots is taking some folks from Tucson to Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. He can stop in Corpus Saturday morning and drop you in Atlanta. I know it might be later than you might want, but it’s quite a drive from Corpus Christi to Atlanta. You wouldn’t get there any faster and this will be more relaxing.” “You sure?”

“Yes, sir. Vance hasn’t crashed too many planes, so he is a good enough pilot. I’m nicer, of course, but beggars can’t be choosers. So, be at the airport at seven Saturday morning and meet up with Vance Edmonds on a Crandair Charter. Same place I dropped you, ? You’d be in Atlanta before noon. How far is this Dannonville?” “I think Autumn said a half an hour. That would be fine. Thanks Crandall.” Landers continued, “Maybe I could get Autumn to relax a bit tomorrow afternoon before we go. This has been awful.” “Poor kid.” Crandall agreed, “Well Dude, it’s always a thrill to gab at you, but our call is breaking the bank. I’ll tell Vance to pick you up. Give the girl a hug for me. Okay?” “Thanks.”

Landers only had time to splash cold water on his face when there was a knock on his door. He answered it with the towel in his hand and there was Autumn. She had decided not to shower and just freshened up a bit. She really didn’t look one bit fresher, in fact, was quite disheveled. He ushered her in, “Ready?” “No, I think you can just bring me something back. I don’t want to see anybody else. I don’t have to look nice for you.” He chuckled, “Thanks a lot!” She gave him a weak grin, “You know what I mean.” “I do, but what do you say we walk down to the sandwich place by the beach. It had outside picnic tables and seemed pretty dark.” He hung the towel and said definitely, “I won’t leave you here alone.” “I wish you and Joey would give all the intense supervision a rest.” Landers grabbed his keys. “Come on,” he took her hand, “No more guff. I’ve made an executive decision.” She growled, “Who made you the executive?”

“That’d be me,” he grinned. He put his keys in his pocket and they went out the door. They walked down the sidewalk the few blocks to the very casual sandwich shop. It was dimming daylight, but Autumn felt comfortable anyway. They ordered their sandwiches and found a table toward the back under one of the ancient oaks. They ate in near silence and Landers could tell that she was finally beginning to relax. When he asked her if she wanted an ice cream bar, it was the first time she had genuinely smiled since that morning. About halfway through the bar, she asked, “Do you think we can walk back on the beach?” He smiled, “That’d be nice.” She nodded and then said, “I suppose we need to Crandall, huh?” “I called him already, when we were back at the room.” After he told her about the plan, she collected their paper plates and napkins from their table and took them to the trash. When she returned, she said, “He is really a kind person, isn’t he?” “Seems to be. I like him,” Landers grinned, “I even like his gruff exterior.” “You know, I used to think that people who were gruff are bad. My parents don’t approve when folks are common, as they call it.” She searched Lander’s eyes, “I wonder if they’re wrong. I am becoming nervous of folks who are too smooth.” “Autumn, in my experience, I’ve never noticed it makes a lot of difference. I’ve met some wonderful sleazes and some sleazy wonder–” She started to giggle, “How are you going to finish that sentence?” He grimaced, “Glad to see you got your spice back.” “I know, huh? Bet you liked me when I was taking my place.” “No, I don’t really.” he looked her directly in the eye, “I hate it when you are sad

and besides, what is your place?” “Beats me. It really beats me.” She slumped, “I’m honestly about to give up.” “Don’t you ever do that!” Landers said with more force than even he expected. “I couldn’t stand that. You’re happiness is very important. And you don’t have a certain place where you belong. You just be yourself. That’s good enough.” She grimaced, “I don’t think so. Ben, I ever only been just barely enough.” He gave her a severe look, “Don’t think that.” “You do. You’re just trying to keep this silly kid from being embarrassed about her schoolgirl crush on you.” “I don’t think that you have a schoolgirl crush on me.” Ben could not hide the hurt in his voice, “I’m not so naïve as to know my feelings about you. We truly have a connection.” She realized that she had hurt him and took his hand, “I’m sorry. I feel so desolate and miserable tonight. I guess I wanted to share my gloom and doom. I should never have said that.” “I understand. I’ve done that myself on occasion.” He squeezed her hand and let it go, “Shall we go back? We’ve had a very traumatic day.” “Do you think we will find another stack of dead bodies tomorrow?” “I certainly hope not.” He stood, “Let’s think positively.” Together they walked back to Alice’s. At the door to their rooms, he gave her the sleeping pill. “Have a good night, Autumn.” She gave him a peck on the cheek, “Maybe tomorrow afternoon, we can do something not so grim.” “That’d be nice,” he smiled and went in his room. Before his shower, Ben called Dr. Samuels to discuss the situation. They agreed that she had a lot on her plate and Ben related her comments about giving up. “I

hope that pill helps. I really worry we might lose her if she has to face much more.” “I know. That sleeping pill should knock her out in about forty five minutes, but it might be good for her tonight.” The men discussed her situation and concluded that tomorrow needed to be a short day for Autumn. It was necessary for her to have a break from all the Brad stuff, especially since she was going to face her parents in a couple days. They said good night. After his shower, Ben put on his sweat suit, read his Breviary, and did his meditation. At least an hour had ed, when there was a small knock on his door. He got out of his chair to answer it and there was Autumn. She was in her pajamas and robe, but didn’t look one bit like she had partaken of any semblance of anything close to rest. When he opened the door, she came directly in, pushed by him and announced decisively, “Ben, I’ve decided. I’m going back to Bismarck tomorrow. I’ll buy a ticket. Could you take the box to Owens and then visit with my parents? I can’t do any more.” He put his arm around her shoulder, “No Autumn. I really can’t let you do that. I’m afraid that’s for only you to see your parents. But soon, it will all be in the past. If you can just hold on a bit longer, things will get better. I promise.” She raised her eyebrows, “You can’t promise that. We both know that.” Then she plunked on the end of his bed, almost shaking, “Do you think he would have murdered me?” He sat down next to her, “I don’t know. It’s certainly a possibility.” “How could anyone be so dumb as to think they’re in love with a murderer?” “That is not a matter of intelligence. There is little way to see into the dark side of someone’s heart. We have to count on faith.” “I have no faith. None. I know you believe in all that. I used to. Now, I think it’s all fake.”

“It isn’t fake. I know you know that. Right now, you’re hurt and angry. But don’t you realize, that God spared your life for a purpose.” “How do you know that?” “You’re here and not in a grave.” “I don’t know about that,” she mumbled. “I don’t understand any of it. I’m not a big fan of God’s purpose. I think stuff just happens, like water splashing over a rock. Nothing to do with anything. You seem to just accept that everything is for the best. How can you do that? Is that why it doesn’t bother you that you don’t even know who your parents are?” The priest was very taken back and almost hurt by her question, “Whatever made you think that it doesn’t bother me?” “Well,” she snapped. “You just seem to accept it.” “Would throwing a tantrum change anything?” “I guess not, but have you ever looked for them?” “I have seriously checked, but always came up empty. Then it dawned on me that I had Sister Agnes. She was a wonderful person and if I hadn’t been left by the church door, I may never have met her.” “I guess that is one way to look at it. I wish I could find something good in all this.” She leaned against his arm and became quiet for a time. Then she said sincerely, “I’m sorry, Ben. I shouldn’t have jumped on you. Will you forgive me?” He gave her a hug, “No worries. I know you are wanting to lash out.” “I really shouldn’t have said that anyway. I just hate all this stuff. I would love one darned thing to be easy,” Autumn confirmed and then giggled in a silly way, “How darned dumb can I be? I know what I found from all this! The best friend in the whole world. My Ben. And you know what else? Maybe we can’t be together in this life, but when we get to heaven we can be married for eternity.” He gave her a crooked grin, “I don’t think there’s marriage in heaven.”

She straightened, frowned deeply, and sputtered, “Well, what the hell kind of heaven is that?” He started to laugh and gave her a hug. She gave him a dirty look, “I’ll tell whoever, that if we can’t get married there, then we’ll shack up! So there!” He stood up and took her hand, “You better get to bed, girl. You’ll need plenty of rest before you fight that battle.” She huffed, “If I get permission for us, will you have my back?” “I’ll be with you either way. You can count on it.” Ben walked back to her room with her. “Tell you what, you go to bed and I will read here until you get to sleep. Okay?” “I don’t need a babysitter.” “I know, but I would like the company.” “You want to talk to me?” “No, silly. Just know you are in the same room.” She shrugged, “You are pretty dingy with some of your ideas.” “Get to sleep,” he said as he picked up his book and sat in the overstuffed chair by the lamp. It took her a bit before he knew she was asleep all wrapped in her blanket cocoon. He watched her for a bit. He wanted to make certain she was sleeping soundly before he left. There was no way he would trust her alone otherwise. He read about half an hour, and checked her again. She was sleeping soundly, and he was convinced the sleeping pill had taken effect. He turned out the light and went back to his room.

47-

The next morning, Landers was awakened by a phone call from Vicaro. He was checking in to see what they had found out. After a discussion of Autumn’s reaction, Vicaro made an observation. “It sounds like she is even more unsettled, swinging from depressed, angry to silly, back and forth.” “She certainly does that.” Landers agreed, “Samuels and I discussed it last night, and we think we need to back off any new revelations today. I think it’s just taking her time to sort through things, and she is trying so hard to keep a grip. It’s beginning to bother her that she was likely close to being murdered herself. She is doubting her ability to judge people, let alone trust them, and now she is realizing that she was in love with someone who was most likely a serial killer. Between you and me, I think he was a psychiatric disaster. She needs to be able to get some sleep at night, not only so she doesn’t bolt on me, but to keep from flipping out. She is not doing well.” “Maybe it’ll help when she visits with her parents.” “I don’t know. I thought that at first, but some of the comments she has made concern me. She can be very open with Alma and George, but I don’t feel that is the case with her own parents.” “I what Alma said that night at dinner about the rest of her family.” Vicaro repeated, “I trust your judgment, Landers. You’re good with this sort of thing. Keep strong. You both are in our prayers.” “Thanks, Vicaro.” A bit later, he knocked on her door to go to breakfast. It took her a minute to answer. One look revealed to Landers that she had not gotten much rest. She was wearing slacks and a pink shirt, but she looked very tired and obviously that she had been crying. “Bad morning?”

“I just talked to Auntie Alma. Uncle George had his chemo yesterday.” “Didn’t it go well?” “I guess okay but he wasn’t feeling well last night. Chris Holloway came over and stayed with him until the severe nausea ed. He’s better this morning.” “That’s good, isn’t it?” “Yes, but Ben, that was my job!” The tears began to flow again. “I was supposed to help them and now I’m down here, costing them money, Joey money, Crandall money, and you money, and I’m just bawling around! —I can’t face it anymore! Please, I can’t do it!” She had built herself into an expanding state of tears and anguish, Then she suddenly broke down, and cried into his arms. He stood, holding her until she cried herself out, before he spoke for the first time, “Autumn, they love you and want the best for you. You told me yourself that they invited you to their place for you, not them. Chris is very good and Megan Elizabeth has helped before. You’ll be home soon. We need to get this mess sorted out. Then you can do those things again.” “I can’t. I’ve tried to keep control and hang in there. I’m worn out. I don’t want to be quiet and not freak out anymore.” She cried again into his shoulder, “I want to scream, bawl, and throw a major tantrum. I’d really like to break something!” He rubbed her back and chuckled, “We can drive out to the country so you can do that, okay? I don’t think you want to break things at Alice’s place.” “It’s no fun to break something that no one wants! That’s the point! You’re so dense.” She growled, and then pouted. “I’ll settle down, but I hate this. I give you my solemn promise that I’ll stay here, if you take the box to Owens. I’m not going to see the folks and that’s that! I’ve decided.” “Oh.” “Is that all you’re going to say?” He chuckled slightly, “You really want to pick a fight, don’t you?”

“Yah,” she sat down on the end of her bed, “I’d like to punch something.” He studied her a second. Then he grabbed a pillow and threw it at her hard. She jumped, caught the pillow, and then gave him a shocked look, “Why did you do that?” He smirked, “I guessed it’d be a good thing to punch. I know you well enough, lady to know that if you blow, I could be in big trouble. I don’t want to walk into the police station all bruised and have to tell Owens that you clobbered me.” She threw the pillow on the bed and wagged her head, “You bug me to death! Know that?” “Yah,” he grinned, “I do.” She glared at him, “I’m going to wash up and then go eat. We don’t have many more chances at the buffet. Then we can go to the police station, you can run in with the box, and then we can go to the country so I can punch you out. Then you don’t have to explain it to Owens. So… don’t say I never did anything for you!” “Gee, your generosity if overwhelming.” “I know, huh?” A few minutes later, the two went through the buffet line. They managed to fill their plates to overflowing. They started to eat and before long, Autumn took off her dark sunglasses. “I can’t eat with them on.” Landers scrunched his face, “What do glasses have to do with eating?” “Well, if I have them on I can’t move my cheeks very well,” she answered as if it was an obvious answer. He was amazed, “I heard you received an academic achievement award in nursing. Right?” She squinted defiantly, “Are you trying to make a point?” “Nope, none at all.” Then he put butter on his blueberry muffin while stifling a

grin, “Just checking.” The young woman put her fork down and became very serious, “Ben. I think I’m going crazy. Not about the glasses, but about everything. I just don’t know what to do with myself. I feel like I’m going out of my skin! I try to be happy and positive and then just like that, I’m in fits of despair. I want to be away from me! You know, everything I have ever dreamed was about to come true— Now, I have nothing. No hope, no plan, nothing. I hate this so much.” He took her hand, “I understand, but you do have a lot. You told me about Alma and George, the boys, Crandall. There is Clarence, don’t forget him! You have your nursing degree and likely an new job.” “Oh,” Autumn interrupted, “I forgot to tell you. Auntie said that the Retirement Home called. I did get the job, day shift. I start in September.” “Congratulations! I’m so happy for you.” “I know. I’m just being ungrateful.” She studied him and then said very seriously, “I feel like a bug caught in a glass bottle. I want to break out.” “I can understand that.” Landers said, “I hope you can just hang in there a little longer. We are almost there. Can we try to get to the police station and then take the rest of the day off from life?” “Like no rules?” “There are always rules, you know that. But let’s think about what we can do that’s fun.” They stopped at the desk to extend the rooms for another night and talked to the car rental folks for the next morning. They loaded the box in the blue Biscayne for the drive to the police station. On the way, Autumn asked, “Have you thought of anything to do after we get finished here? I can’t bear thinking about anymore, but I can’t think of anything to do. So, I’m putting you in charge.” He chuckled, “Does that mean that you won’t argue with my choice?”

“Goodness no!” They pulled into the parking lot of the police station and took the box inside. Owens was there with a big smile, “Feel!” He beamed as he held his hand up toward the vent, “The air is on! Why I fell on my knees and offered up my first born in joy this morning!” Landers laughed, “How did your first born feel about that?” “She and her husband have triplets that are getting over the measles. I really don’t think she cared!” He chuckled, “I tell you, one at a time is bad enough. Three at once is uncivilized!” They handed over the box and then briefly went through the things with him. He was very pleased with the information and Autumn found the ring so he could put it aside. He said he didn’t know where things would lead, but he had talked to the States Attorney about it. They decided it warranted further investigation and were reopening the case. “We also want to check more into Vander Vorst’s past and his death. We feel there is more to find. We’d at least try to settle the case, and maybe enable Olivia Jerrimans family to recover that money from his estate, which his parents have now. When I talked to Jerrimans last night, they said they had taken a policy on each of their children years ago. Olivia had not changed the beneficiary a few days before the wedding. But apparently she had named him beneficiary on the day after the wedding! That is likely why it fell under the radar. What a bastard. Mostly, they will get peace of mind. They’ll be by this morning. Mrs. Jerriman was very happy that she’d get the ring back. It had been her father’s and is worth a fair amount. They worried it was lost forever. They want to pay you a reward.” Autumn’s eyes went to the Detective, “No way. I just want to be done with this whole thing. I feel bad enough that I was a survivor, while their daughter was not. I don’t want a reward.” He nodded and said, “I understand, but I’d like to get your address anyway. She may want to send it to you. I’m sure you or Father Landers could find something useful to do with it.” She turned to Landers and he said, “If Autumn doesn’t want it, maybe Mrs. Jerrimans could give it to her favorite charity.”

“I’ll tell her.” Owens smiled, “Hear that grumble? That means our coffee is done! That thing sounds like a cement mixer! Want a cup?” “I’ve never had coffee made in a cement mixer,” Landers grinned. Owens returned with three cups and sat down, “Oh, hope you don’t want cream or sugar? We just have black.” “Black is fine.” Ben smiled, “There is something you can do. We are leaving early tomorrow morning, but wanted to do something to relax today. Autumn is about at the end of her rope and needs to get outside. I don’t want to go on the water, obviously. Any ideas?” Owens pulled open his desk drawer, “Do I have an idea? In fact, I’ve more than that! My brother and his gang were here from Vermont last week. We took them out to the Wild Safari Park about thirty miles from town. I bought a week and there are still two days on it.” He handed the to Landers, “You can get in for free and I think there’s still a couple freebies available with the . Take it and enjoy.” “We can’t take your ,” Autumn responded. “So, I’ll let it expire in my drawer and throw it away. It’ll be wasted.” Autumn looked at the es, “What do you think?” she asked Landers. “Have you ever seen a lion up close?” He asked. “No.” “Well, then maybe we should do that. How do you get there?” The detective gave him directions and told about what there was to do at the park. They finished their coffee and Owens walked them out the door. He looked up as a bright, lime green sports car drove up in front of the station. He said, “There are Jerrimans. That is Ray’s sports car, new this spring. Isn’t that the most god-awful color anyone ever imagined for a car?” All the blood drained from Autumn’s face. She turned her eyes to Landers. He looked back at her without a word.

Owen picked up on it and asked, “Is something wrong?” “I don’t think that Autumn wants to meet them. I hope you understand.” The detective looked over to where the young man and his mother were getting out of the car, “I guess I can. I know they’d like to thank you, but that’s what thank you cards are for. You folks go and have a nice day. I really appreciate you making the effort to help rectify things.” “It was great meeting you and thank you for the .” Landers shook his hand while Autumn just stood there, unmoving. “I’ll keep in touch if we find anything else, or need you to testify. I will definitely keep you informed.” Ben took her arm and nearly drug her to their rental. Once in the car, she started to cry. “My God! It wasn’t Jake! It was Ray! I would’ve staked my life on it! Here I was so sure and I almost accused him!” He squeezed her hand and said, “Calm down. Take a deep breath and think about this. While I thought the same thing, we don’t know that it was Ray either. It only tells me that this isn’t our mystery to solve. You did a lot to sort things out. Now, the rest is for others. Agree?” “Do you really believe that?” “Did I tell you that?” “Well, yes, but..” “Autumn.. enough.” She studied him a moment before she said, “You’re right. Why do I do that?” He raised one eyebrow, “Why do you think you can’t eat with sunglasses on?” She scowled, “I just bet there’s a lion at that Safari place that has a hankering for a Ben sandwich!” He laughed as he turned out on to the street, “Do you need to go back to the

room to change clothes or anything? You know, collect your elephant gun?”

It was about an hour later, the two were parking their car at the Wild Safari Park. Landers was glad they were both dressed casually because it was already getting quite warm and humid. They checked in and were handed a pile of brochures explaining all the things to do or see. They decided to have a lemonade and sat in the gift-ticket-beverage shop and looked it all over. When Autumn came back from the restroom, she said, “Ben! There are about a million postcards over there. We have to get some for the kids! Let’s not forget.” “That’s a great idea. Where to start on all this? I checked and we can get a fifty percent discount on the flight line, if you want to be that athletic.” “How far does it go?” “About 600 feet. Ever been on one?” “No, have you?” “No, but it looks like fun. I’ll spring for it, if you want to try. There is a one where you hang on with your hands and the other where you sit in a seat.” “What if you lose your grip? Would you fall into a pack of wild animals?” “You can find out. I’m going on the seat thing. I’m not Tarzan.” She watched him while he waited for her to make a crack, but she didn’t. Finally, he asked, “Aren’t you going to say something nasty?” She giggled, “No. I’ll wait until you fall out and say I told you so.” He made a face, “Come on, while I still have a mind to take you.” They went down the ride without a hitch. It was exciting and fast, covering most of the short end of the park. When they were walking away, Landers asked, “Wasn’t that neat? Clarence would have loved that! Did you see the animals?” “No,” Autumn answered abruptly.

“You mean you missed the herd of Wildebeest?” “I said I didn’t see any animals,” she almost snarled. “Didn’t you enjoy the ride?” “It was okay, but I couldn’t see anything.” “Why not? I don’t understand.” She crossed her eyes, “You and Joey! You never let anything go. I couldn’t see anything because I had my eyes shut! It is unnatural for a human to fly through the sky like that. Completely unnatural!” Lander laughed so hard, he could hardly contain himself. Finally she groused, “Knock it off. So, I was a little windy before. I told you I’d never done that. How did I know how scary it was?” He tried to be understanding, but still chuckled to himself about it. After a few minutes, she issued an ultimatum, “One more laugh and you’ll be sorry.” That just made him laugh harder. They used their and went on the trolley trip through the park and saw a lot of animals. It was very interesting and they had a great time. About two, they came back to the main grounds and walked through the baby animal petting zoo. It was almost three, when Landers sighed, “I’m ready for a break. How about you?” “The only animal I want to see is one that is fried and between two pieces of bread.” “That’s my girl. Just oozing with Southern charm.” “What do you expect? I’m hungry.” They ate in the open garden café and had a nice lunch. Afterward they were both pretty worn out and Autumn stifled a yawn when the waitress came to refill their iced tea. She smiled, “This place does that to folks. That’s why we have the Quiescent Station.”

“What is that?” Landers asked. “Over in that grove, there are hammocks. You can rent one for an hour, put your feet up and just take a break. You may take your iced teas over there if you’d like.” “Hm, what do you say, Autumn?” “Sounds like a great idea. My feet are worn out.” They walked over to the Quiescent Station and found rental hammocks were $1 an hour. They didn’t quibble about the price. There, strung between two humungous trees were double hammocks and next to them a table/locker cabinet for their belongings. They rented one and put their drinks on top and their stuff below. Then they looked over the hammock. “Do you know how to get into this?” Autumn asked. “It can’t be that hard.” Landers deduced, looking at all the others in the station. “There must be fifty people here resting on them.” It only took them about four attempts. Each was dumped unceremoniously on the ground a time or two. After watching for a while to his great amusement, an elderly man came over and told them how to get on it. His method worked and was rather simple. They thanked him profusely, but really could have done without the smirks he was unable to conceal. After the man walked away, Lander mumbled quietly to Autumn, “I feel like little Clarissa when she says ‘I think I might be mad about that.’ Autumn giggled and for a few minutes, they both lay next to each other like two petrified logs. Then she asked, “Are you relaxing?” “Not even close. I’m afraid to move a muscle for fear we will spin off this contraption again!” “Me, too,” she mumbled, “An hour, huh? Then how do we get off this thing?” “I don’t know about how other people do it, but I know our method!” They fell silent again for a minute or so before he said, “I’m thirsty, but I’m

afraid to reach for the iced tea.” “I thought about that, too. A dollar, huh?” Then they started to laugh. Landers decided to look around and see how others did it. After a lot of scrutiny and forethought, they finally maneuvered to each get their iced teas. Then they did relax to the quiet, ambient African music from the speakers in the trees and both dozed off. They woke when the couple suspended next to them got up to leave and he put his arm around her shoulder. She curled up and went back to sleep. He lay there watching her sleep and was overwhelmed at the wonderful day they had shared. He could barely having that much fun in a long time. Not that he was an unhappy man, because he wasn’t. But this was different. They really enjoyed each other and it was nice. Simply nice. Then he fell asleep. The safari master came over and told them their time was up unless they wanted to extend. They decided that there were more things they wanted to see, so they left. When they were walking over to the hippopotamus display, Autumn took his hand. “Ben, I had a great rest, what about you?” “I did, too, once I fell asleep.” Then he looked at her, “You look more rested than you have in sometime.” “You mean, not like a zombie? When I first woke up, I thought I might buy a hammock for my room.” “Really?” “Then I realized that my bed isn’t nearly as scary.” They stayed for the outdoor barbeque and the show of African dancers before they headed back to Alice’s. When they parked the car, they went through it to make certain they hadn’t left anything. Autumn found the folder from the newspaper office under the seat. They had jammed some of the photos from the police station into it also. “Should I just throw it?” “You know, maybe not. Jessups might be interested in it.” “That’s true. I guess I can put it in my suitcase.”

At her door, she said, “Thank you for today, Ben. It was one of the nicest times I’ve ever had. Although my butt doesn’t think so.” “Your butt?” “I believe I sustained permanent injury crashing from the hammock.” “I know I’ll have black and blue marks. We better get some rest. We have to be at the airport before seven.”

48-

Saturday morning was a bit overcast, but still uncomfortably warm. The couple met in the hallway shortly after they received their wake up calls. They arrived downstairs in plenty of time and the wonderful man at the front desk offered them a cup of coffee. They were extremely grateful. They settled the bill and then took their bags out to the porch to wait for the car rental folks. As they sat mulling over their coffee, Landers smiled at Autumn, “How’s the butt?” “Strange question coming from someone in a clerical collar!” She giggled, “A bit bruised. And you?” “A few more aches than usual this morning. I wonder what those people thought watching us fall repeatedly?” “Cheap entertainment.” Autumn answered, “You know, that was a very good idea. What did they call that nap place?” “The Quiescent Station. It is a good idea. I bet they make a fortune. Maybe we’re in the wrong business?” “No, don’t think so. We’d get sued for bruised hinders!” “Good point.” He looked up the drive, “The car folks are sure punctual.” A little later, they had settled up with the car rental man and were waiting at the private air terminal for Vance Edmonds of Crandair Charters. They only stood a few minutes when a man approached them, “Would you be Landers and Simms?” “Yes,” Landers answered, “I take it that you are Vance Edmonds?” “That I am. Crandall told me that you’d be waiting and I should take good care of you. You are his friends and you know, he doesn’t call many people that. We

have to coddle the few who are willing to take on that assignment,” Vance chuckled. “Who said it was willingly?” Landers laughed. Vance wagged his head, “Good point. Well, I have some desert rats waiting to take off. They should be back from their potty breaks, so we can go. Atlanta? Is that right?” Landers nodded, “That’s right.” The two simply nodded at the Tucson engers and settled into the last two seats in the back. There wasn’t a lot of room, but they weren’t traveling that far. They were both asleep after a few minutes in the air. When they landed in Atlanta, Vance helped them get their bags and told them where to find a car rental. “Have a good trip. Crandall gave me this phone number this morning and said to have you call him tonight.. after eight. Then he will know more about where to meet up with you. It was great meeting you.” “Thank you so much,” Autumn said. “I feel embarrassed, but are we supposed to tip you or something.” “Oh lord no! Crandall would pour hot oil in my ears. You are friends.” The man smiled and then started to turn. “Thanks, so very much. We owe you one.” As they carried their bags to the car rental booth, Autumn said, “We are going to have to be nice to Crandall for like at least a month, huh?” “Yah, about that long,” Landers shook his head, “Or we could just be nice.” She stopped walking and asked, “Did I do something wrong?” “No. Not at all, why do you ask?” “I don’t know, I feel like you’re withdrawing.” “I guess I am. I’m uneasy about meeting your parents. I’m not certain why.”

“Did Uncle George tell you about them?” “No. What would he tell?” She shrugged, “Not much, but everything that Jessups are, the Simms aren’t. Maybe after we get the car, we can have some breakfast and I’ll tell you the difference.” “Now I’m really worried.” “You shouldn’t be.” As she walked on ahead of him, he stood there a second, wondering what on earth she meant. They got their car, this time 1970 Ford Fairlane with a red body and a white top and interior. Autumn smiled as the loaded their bags in the trunk, “Our cars are getting snazzier.” “Do you think this is snazzy?” She stepped back and smiled, “Almost.” “Man, are you hard to please.” “I know, and for that, I’m buying breakfast. We haven’t eaten since Africa.” Just outside of Atlanta, Ben Landers pulled into a nice family restaurant off the highway. Inside, they ordered and were enjoying their coffee when he asked, “Did you call your parents last night to say you were coming?” She shook her head no, but never said anything. Then he asked, “Do you want to call them now?” “Not really.” He set down his cup, “Okay Autumn. We decided long ago, no secrets. I think you’re hiding something from me and I don’t like it.” “I’m sorry. I’m just trying to figure out how to break it to you.” She pursed her lips, “You know how Jessups are open, honest, loving, and understanding? My parents aren’t. I mean they aren’t bad, just extremely reserved. Dad is all

business or anything that affects his business. Mother is all about appearances, reputation, stature, and status. They are a fine pair —for each other.” “I’m sorry, Autumn, I didn’t realize that. Is that part of the reason for you coming to North Dakota?” “Most of the reason. Dad couldn’t understand why I didn’t just run right out and get a job while Mother wanted me to throw myself into some charity thing. All the while, I just wanted to kill somebody. It didn’t make for anything good. We mostly just stayed out of each other’s way. “We don’t argue or make a fuss at my home. Mother will never allow us to talk about distasteful things. We disagree and criticize, but with a smile, if you know what I mean. Throwing a tantrum isn’t an option. Nothing is ever allowed to sully the family name. I’ve never told my folks anything close to how I felt about what happened. Mother would have likely had a stroke or at the very least, a serious case of the vapors. My dad would have simply left the room.” “So, is that why Alma asked you to come up there?” “I think so. I used to spend summers with them before they moved north. I loved them and they let me be me. The times that I talked to Auntie Alma on the phone, I told her more than I have ever told my own mother. It isn’t that Mother doesn’t care, it is just that she can’t or won’t deal with it. She is the kind of person who will never go into the trenches with you, but will organize a fund raiser to buy you a shovel.” Landers chuckled, “So, what do you want out of this visit?” “I don’t want to have it at all. Aunt Alma and Uncle George almost insisted. Auntie said that mother should get over her precious self and at least hear the truth. Then she can go back into her parlor and suck down mint juleps.” “Does your family have a pastor they confide in?” “They go to the Christian Church of Dannonville. They attend regularly and my father is on the board. It looks good for his business. Mother, of course, does the charity bit. They’d never tell the minister anything bad or controversial, ever.” “I’m certain their minister would keep it in confidence. His job is to help with

things are bad.” “He’ll never know, because my parents would never tell him a thing. And if I did, I’d be banished from their kingdom.” Autumn explained, “I guess Jessups think it’ll at least give my parents an idea of what happened and maybe understand my actions better. Auntie says we aren’t to say what they do with it, but they’re entitled to know. Especially now, if the case is reopened and becomes public knowledge.” “She has a point.” The food came and before they started to eat, Landers said a blessing. While he was making the sign of the cross, Autumn gasped and he asked, “What is it?” “Something we all forgot! Oh no! My parents have no use for the Catholic Church. They think it is a cult or something.” Autumn shook her head, “They’ll have a fit. I know Jessups never thought of that either. And promise, whatever happens, don’t ever tell them I went to Mass. They’d both die.” “Hm. That could be a problem.” Landers frowned, “I don’t care for me, but what about you? What do you suggest? Should I not go with you?” “If you don’t come with me, I refuse to go. They can just go chew on rocks if they don’t like it.” Autumn determined, “I don’t really give a hoot.” Landers chuckled, “You’re something else.” She narrowed her eyes, “Is that good or bad?” “Very good,” he grinned. “Well, yesterday we were in the lion’s den and survived, so I guess we can handle today. Right?” While enjoying another cup of coffee, Autumn said very seriously, “Oh, I bought you a gift yesterday. I want to give it to you before we get to my parents.” “What? You didn’t have to get me anything.” “I know, but I saw it and I wanted you to have it. I don’t know if it is the right thing or not, but I really want you to have something to me by.”

“I couldn’t forget you.” She smiled, “But still.” She pulled a small paper sack from her purse and handed it to him. He opened it and was amazed. It was a box labeled, Makonde Carving, African Blackwood. He opened it and there was a beautiful hand carved Rosary. He was astonished. He picked it out of its box and looked it over carefully, “Autumn, this is the most wonderful gift I’ve ever received. It’s simply beautiful.” “Is it okay for me to give it to you? I don’t know about that stuff, but I wanted you to have something you could keep always.” “This is wonderful. I love it,” then he reached over and squeezed her hand. “I don’t know what to say. I’ll cherish it always.” “Do you really like it?” “Yes, I really do. I’ll have it blessed and then keep it with me all the time.” She smiled, “Good. If someone asks, tell them it is from someone you met in the lion’s den!” “It is extraordinarily thoughtful.” “I’m glad you are thanking me now, because you may rethink it once you get to Dannonville.” “Ah, how bad can it be?” She grimaced, “Now why did you go and say that? Every time someone says that, all hell breaks loose!” She took out her mirror, combed her hair, and checked her makeup. She turned to him, “Do I look presentable?” He appraised her and then said, “You look fine to me, but you might want to see if you can get that bit of jelly off your collar.” “Oh my word! How long have you known it was there? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I never noticed before honestly. Do I look okay?” She looked him over quickly, “You look nice. I better go wash off the jelly.”

They drove down the wide residential street in the small town. The homes were enormous and set back on expansive lawns graced with Weeping Willows and both Evergreen Magnolia Trees and the smaller, Deciduous Magnolia Trees. Every home had a large verandah that overlooked the lazy street. It was idyllic. Obviously, this was a wealthy part of town, but there wasn’t much else. The little suburb was the affluent bedroom community to the thriving Atlanta. When they approached a three-story white house with black shutters and door, Autumn said, “Turn in here. The drive goes around to the back, but we will park out front by the fountain. I don’t want to presume that we’ll be invited to stay.” “It’s your home, isn’t it?” “It is my parent’s home.” Though he couldn’t understand the difference, he really had little in his own life as a point of reference. He had always assumed that a person’s parent’s home was usually welcome to them. They went up the steps and rang the bell. In a few minutes, a middle-aged Asian lady opened the door for them. One look and the lady burst into a huge grin and gave Autumn a big embrace. “Miss Autumn, what a wonderful surprise! Are you well? I missed you so! Do your parent’s know you are here?” “Not yet,” Autumn grinned. “Riza, it’s great to see you again. How have you been? I’d love you to meet my dearest friend, Father Ben Landers. Father, this is Riza Santos. She has cared for my family forever.” “Hello, Riza,” he offered her his hand. She shook it with a great smile and then said, “I must go announce you. Please wait. It’s wonderful to see you again.” The tiny woman scurried off and Autumn turned to Ben, “She bandaged more

knees than you can imagine. She raised us kids and was always there to pick us up and brush us off.” Just then, a lady resembling Autumn came into the large entry from a back sitting room, “Autumn! I’m astonished. I had no idea that you were coming!” The woman approached and gave her daughter a slight hug before assessing Landers. “I understand from Riza that you’re with my daughter. I’m sorry, I don’t recall your name.” “My name is Father Ben Landers, from Merton.” “Oh my, this is a surprise.” Then she turned to her daughter, “I hope this doesn’t mean that you have worn out your welcome with Alma and George so soon.” “Not at all, Mother. I had to come South to sort some things and Father Landers was kind enough to accompany me.” Mrs. Simms nodded, her mind swirling with questions, and then said, “My, where are my manners? I suppose you’d like some refreshments. Come in and I’ll have Riza bring a cool beverage. A limeade, darling?” “Yes, Mother.” Mrs. Simms continued, “And what about your friend?” Autumn bit her lip, “You can ask him. He’s right here.” “Oh, don’t mind me. Of course,” she looked at Landers. He nodded politely, “Limeade sounds wonderful.” The woman nodded without expression and moved toward the sitting room. “Go in darling, and offer your friend a chair. I’ll let Riza know to bring us an iced drink. Your father will be home soon from country club and us. Then you can explain about your surprise visit.” The two entered the sunny room and sat down on the rattan chairs with overstuffed cushions. Neither said a word and it reminded Landers for all the world of sitting in a dentists’ waiting room. His mind was doing so many

gymnastics in his head, he didn’t know where to begin. He tried to read Autumn’s face, but it was nearly expressionless. He smiled at her and she smiled faintly back at him. They sat there. They heard Mrs. Simms on the phone to her husband in another room. She speaking in a hushed, almost frantic tone, “You really must come home immediately, Dear. Something is dreadfully amiss. Your daughter is here. Autumn.” She hesitated and then clarified it further, “There is someone with her. One of those Catholic priests. Please come home right away.” Then they heard the receiver go back in its cradle, just as Riza came in with the drinks. She noticed their apprehension and smiled. After she set down the drinks on coasters, she patted Autumn’s shoulder and said quietly, “It’ll be fine. You might your Mother isn’t very flexible.” “I know,” Autumn replied very softly. “I know.” The two sat for almost ten minutes, listening to the ticking of the large grandfather clock resonate down the hardwood hallway until Mrs. Simms returned. She was noticeably nervous as she sat down, “I assume you flew?” “Partly,” Autumn answered. “Then a rental car.” Mrs. Simms nodded. The clock’s ticking filled the silence for a few more minutes. Then Autumn said, “Mother, could you excuse me to go to the rest room?” “Certainly,” the lady nodded but gave Landers an apprehensive look. “Would you like to freshen up also?” “Yes, actually. I would.” Both Landers and Mrs. Simms seemed relieved not to be alone in the same room. “I’m sure Autumn can show you the way.” As they went out down the hall, Autumn made a face and said softly, “See what I mean? Here, you may use this bath and I’ll go use one off the kitchen. Maybe I can con Riza into bringing us a cookie or something.” He nodded and went into the bathroom. Landers wondered how long he could hide out in there, when he heard someone come down the hall. When he left the

bathroom, he started down the hallway and saw Mrs. Simms whispering anxiously to a man about her age. Landers assumed it was Mr. Simms. Mrs. Simms noticed him and said, “Mister Landers, this is my husband, Ronald Simms.” Ronald Simms seemed none too happy to make the acquaintance, but shook Landers hand anyway. “My wife, Grace, said that you traveled here with our daughter. Is that correct?” “Yes.” Grace Simms told her husband, “I’ll have Riza bring you some refreshments and you can us in the sun room. Autumn is there, also.” The two men moved down the hall and just then, Autumn came into the hallway, “Father?” He looked at her and then smiled. He did give her a warm hug, which pleased Landers, “You shouldn’t have surprised us. We weren’t expecting you.” “I didn’t know what our schedule would be.” “Well, Mother is getting us some refreshments, so we can discuss it all. Come, sit down.”

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The four took sips from their drinks and then sat, each waiting for someone else to begin. Autumn was becoming frustrated and Landers could tell she was about to burst. So, he started, “This limeade is very refreshing. Thank you.” “Grace always serves excellent refreshments,” Ronald responded and Grace nodded a thank you to her husband. Autumn glanced at Landers and he was afraid she was going to roll her eyes. Grace had done nothing except order someone else to bring it for them, but it was delicious. He began, “I’m certain that you are wondering what this is about. I’d like to explain it, as best I can. Autumn has been through—” “We know what our daughter has been through, Mr. Flanders.” Ronald interjected sternly, “What we don’t understand is what the trip is about or your involvement.” “Father, I asked Ben Landers to be here! He has helped me though this. There is a lot more to everything than you understand,” Autumn said. “I would be nowhere without him, Crandall, and Joey. Please, just listen.” “Darling, please resist being so melodramatic,” Grace started. “Your father and I know how you like histrionics. Please be adult about this. We understand that you are suffering from the loss of your precious Brad, but you’ll find someone else. However, traveling around the nation with a Catholic priest is not the way to do that. You may rest assured that I’ll be speaking to Alma about this. Our choice to send you there may have been misguided.” “No, it wasn’t.” Autumn said, mostly to her father, “Just listen before you decide. Promise to hear us out.” Her father studied her and then relented somewhat, “Alright. Make your case why we shouldn’t insist you return home to Dannonville, immediately. We can find you a facility where you can deal with your emotions.”

“I don’t need a damned facility!” Autumn snapped. Landers caught her glance and shook his head no. She sat back and glowered, while her mother began fanning herself and taking deep breaths. Her father simply frowned, “What do you have to say, Flanders?” Landers struggled to control his rising temper and then said, “When Autumn arrived at Jessups, she had difficulty dealing with the issues surrounding Brad’s death. She and I became acquainted, since I’m a family friend of Jessups.” “I know better than that. Priests don’t have friends,” Ronald corrected him. “Actually, we do.” Landers smiled before continuing, “Autumn and I had discussed many of those issues and were sorting them out, when the box arrived from Vander Vorsts. That presented even more questions, some very serious ones. We all—” “Who is all?” her father demanded. “Alma, George, Dr. Samuels, Father Vicaro, Sammy, Joey, and I decided that it needed to be investigated more thoroughly. So, another good friend of ours is a charter pilot and he flew us to Corpus Christi. We just came from there this morning.” “Corpus Christi?” Ronald was becoming interested. “What is the connection in Corpus Christi, of all places?” Father Landers began, “That last day of orientation, Autumn worked in the Atlanta Emergency Room, they brought in a young woman who had overdosed. Her brother had found her and called the ambulance. While they were trying to save Camille, Autumn became aware that the patient’s half-brother was Brad’s roommate in Atlanta. The girl had left a suicide note and when she was pronounced dead, Jake dropped it. Autumn picked it up and read it. It was an intimate note written to Brad. She had been having an affair with him and was mourning the loss of their child which they had aborted.” “No,” Grace straightened her back and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t be taken in with Autumn’s fantasies. This is from some cheap detective magazine. It is nonsense! Brad was a fine young man. He would never…”

“Grace,” Ronald stopped his wife, “Let the man finish his case. Then we will decide the veracity of it.” “But Ronald, Vander Vorsts are fine people.” Grace stated, mostly reassuring herself. “Certainly we can all understand he may have had a youthful fling. Autumn, you need to accept that men of stature often weaken to the wiles of an aggressive woman. You must accept those things happen. A good life should not be tossed aside because of the actions of a woman of uncertain reputation.” “Mother! He was a cheat and a liar!” Autumn blurted out. Landers took Autumn’s hand, “No, Autumn.” Her eyes studied his demeanor and she finally nodded. Landers went on to explain the references in the box to a wife in Corpus Christi. Now, Ronald was listening intently. When Grace tried to say it was a certain misunderstanding, Ron gave her a glare and she became quiet. Landers explained the trip to Corpus Christi, the newspaper office, Bailey’s Starfish, and then the police station. Ronald leaned back in his chair and Landers could tell he was become very concerned. Grace was still quiet, but she was now dabbing her tear-filled eyes and sobbing with great shuddering sighs. “It must be a case of mistaken identity!” Grace stood, “I don’t believe any of this. I really can’t waste any more time with this nonsense.” Ronald said sternly, “Sit down, Grace .” Landers asked Autumn, “Do you still have that folder from the newspaper?” “Yes, in my suitcase.” He handed her the keys, “Can you get them, or do you need me to help you wrestle the bags?” “I can get it.” “You sure?” “Yes, Ben. I can.”

Riza had come back into the room with the pitcher of iced limeade and asked, “Will your guests be staying for lunch, Mr. Simms?” Ronald answered, “Of course. Thanks, Riza. Please hold any calls for us.” “Yes, sir.” She answered, “Lunch will be in about an hour. Would you like to eat in the dining room or on the patio?” “Patio,” Ronald answered. The man judged Landers with scrutiny, “I wasn’t aware that priests helped nonCatholics.” “We try to help anyone in need.” “Oh. You mean, especially if they’re Catholic.” The man said coldly, “Or if you think you can make them Catholic. I’m telling you now, don’t make any plans for my daughter converting, or turning her into a nun or something.” Landers chuckled, “Never entered my mind. Autumn is wonderful just the way she is.” Ronald raised his eyebrows in surprise, but never commented. Then Landers continued, “I have many friends who aren’t Catholic.” “Oh.” Ronald was suspicious, but nodded, “Well, don’t get any ideas.” Landers leaned back in the chair and took a drink of his limeade. A few minutes later, Autumn returned with the folder from the newspaper office and handed it to her father. They had placed some of the copies from the police station in there, so it told a rather complete . He took it eagerly and began to page through it. When he saw the photo of Camille’s family at the gravesite, with Brad holding some flowers, he pointed it out to his wife. “It’s not a case of mistaken identity.” Grace started to hyperventilate and Ronald became worried. Grace was about to faint and Landers asked if they had a paper bag. Riza quickly brought one. He fixed it so Grace could breathe in and out of it and then she calmed down. Ronald gave him a quizzical look, “How does that work?” Autumn answered, “It increases the amount of carbon dioxide in her intake

which will calm her breathing.” “Why didn’t you do it?” the man asked his daughter. She scrunched up her face, “Do you honestly think Mother would’ve let me?” He gave a slight shrug, said, “Not likely.” After a few minutes, everyone regained their composure, Ronald pointed out that the police had not pressed any charges, so therefore, the wife’s death was most certainly an accident. Then Landers explained the scenario with Patty in Oregon. Mrs. Simms was nearly spastic, “This is incomprehensible. Brad was near Toledo. That’s in the Midwest. I’m certain that his parents knew nothing of this!” Riza brought ice in for their drinks and overheard. This was too much for her and she interrupted, “Begging your pardon, Mr. Simms. I don’t mean to interfere, but I must say something.” Ronald answered, “Certainly Riza, no doubt we were quite loud and hard to dismiss. What is it?” “My friend, Amelia, works for Vander Vorsts. She confided in me last summer that the family was aware that Brad was having some difficulties with a girl who was in the family way. That’s all she told me, because they didn’t know if the Vander Vorsts would have to travel to Oregon or not.” “Thank you, Riza.” Ronald raised his eyebrows and took a deep breath. “All we really seem certain of is that the young man had a very high libido.” Landers watched the man, “May I suggest that he was likely a murderer? I think it was by the grace of God that Autumn was spared. Our only motive for this trip was to put the pieces in order, so Autumn could begin rebuilding her life. She wanted to find out if Brad had a wife somewhere. Autumn didn’t want to tell you, but the rest of us felt you should know the facts. We only came to tell you and we did. We are not asking for your approval or assistance.” “Should we sign you into a mental rest home, darling?” Grace asked her daughter sympathetically. “You can get over your hallucinations. We can find one away from here, so no one will be the wiser.”

Landers felt the woman was sincere and wanted to be a help to her daughter, but had no idea how to go about it. Autumn, however, did not take it well. “For crying out loud! I’m not the one that was running around killing people! Brad was the sociopath. I don’t need to go to a hospital! I’m not crazy!” Autumn jumped to her feet and began to cry. Landers recognized the look of flight in her eye and stood to stop her. He grabbed her arm to restrain her and said, “Calm down, Autumn. She didn’t mean it that way.” He continued talking calmly a few minutes until Autumn began to relax. Then she sat down and Landers retook his seat. Autumn looked back and forth between her parents, hoping that maybe one of them would offer some reassurance. It wasn’t forthcoming. She turned to Landers, “May we leave, please?” Landers looked to her parents and neither responded, he said, “Of course.” He stood and held out his hand to Ronald. “I’m sorry to have upset you all but we felt that you deserved to know. We’ll be on our way. Thank you for the limeade.” Autumn stood and held out her hand to her father for the folder. He handed it to her but seemed almost dumbfounded. Grace was sniffling and fussing in her own little world, not paying a bit of attention. Landers took Autumn’s arm and they started down the hall. Before they got to the door, Ronald came up behind them and suddenly blurted out, “This is wrong! Please stay. Riza is preparing lunch. You should stay. It is simply a great deal to take in. You can stay in your room until you’re ready to leave and I’ll find you a room at the hotel, Landers. Please don’t go like this! Grace needs to have time to absorb this.” Autumn shook her head no, “You will not get Ben a room in a hotel. This house has rooms all over. Forget it. You sit here in your world and forget the whole damned thing! I didn’t want to come here! I knew what you’d be like. I just knew it.” “But Autumn, he is a priest. We cannot harbor a Catholic in our home.” “He is my best friend! I’ll not stay if he can’t,” she said as she went out the door.

Landers began to follow her and Ronald grabbed his sleeve, “I’m asking you to please convince her to stay. I know her mother loves her and would be shattered if she left without mending fences. You can stay here. I was being rude and inconsiderate. Autumn is correct. We have more than enough room. She’s our little girl, but she has always been the most difficult to deal with. She was always the one in the mud, scratching her knees climbing through fences, and cutting her Cotillion Dolls hair with a clipper. Marion, our other daughter, was always happy with tea parties. I know you don’t owe this to me after the way I’ve behaved, but please, talk Autumn into staying.” Landers put his hand on the man’s shoulder, “I’ll talk to her. I can’t speak for her, but I should stay where she does. She is having a difficult time handling this and needs her medication. Her counselor didn’t want her on her own.” Ronald nodded, “I would appreciate your efforts.”

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Landers got into the car and turned to the young woman, who was trying very hard to keep from crying. She asked, “What did he want?” “He asked me to try convincing you to stay and mend fences with your mother. He was very sincere. I believe he doesn’t want a rift in the your family.” “That’s difficult to believe from the way they acted.” “He apologized to me and invited us both to stay.” “What do you want to do?” “I’ll abide by whatever you decide. I don’t want to be away from you, in case you need something. That’d be very unwise. Dr. Samuels would have my hide.” “I don’t know. I just wish once my Mother would act real. Can’t she just be normal and think about someone other than the they? What is so great about those they people anyway?” Landers smiled, “That happens sometimes when people are insecure. She is trying to feel that she has earned acceptance from her peers. May I ask you something?” “Sure.” “Did you expect your mother to act any differently?” Autumn looked out over the well-manicured lawn, “No, not really. This is her.” “Then why do you think that leaving will make a point? This is the way she is, but she is your mother. You wouldn’t expect her to be four feet taller, would you? Can you accept her as she is? You’re asking her to accept you as you are.” “You think I’m being unkind to her, don’t you?”

“Not in the least. I can’t imagine why she is saying those hurtful things. It makes me angry. However, I don’t want you to spend years regretting you don’t have a relationship with your mother. You have to go to the well that gives water. True enough. But there is no reason to destroy the well that doesn’t. There has to be some good things that she has done for you. Cherish those. When you want understanding, you have Alma. I suspect that you’ve always had Riza.” Autumn grinned, “I love Riza. She has always been there for me.” “If you break things off with your parents, how often will you see Riza?” “I don’t want to fight with my parents. I hoped they would be different.” He chuckled, “You might think you were at the wrong address!” She gave him a dirty look, “You do know you’re a nincompoop, don’t you?” “I wondered before I met you. Now, I’m certain.” “We’ll stay for lunch and see how it goes. But promise that we don’t have to be here very long if I can’t take it.” “I promise. I don’t know how long I can take it, myself.” “Okay, let’s go back in.” Ronald came out on the porch and met them. He gave his daughter an embrace and shook Lander’s hand. “Thank you so much. Would you like me to call Madrid to bring your bags?” “No,” Autumn answered. “We’ll stay for lunch and see how it goes. If Mother is still upset, then it may be best for us to come back another time.” “I understand.” He motioned them into the house, “Make yourselves at home. I’ll go speak with your Mother. Lunch will be on the patio.” The two watched him climb the magnificent stairway that opened into the hallway. Autumn’s face was a study as he walked away. Then she shrugged to Landers, “I’d like to show you the gardens out back. Okay?”

“Okay,” he smiled, relieved at the prospect of something more pleasant. Outside, Autumn made a beeline for the gardens beyond the patio. When she spied a man about her father’s age wearing a straw hat and raking, she shouted, “Madrid! Guess who this is!” The man looked up in surprise. “Miss Autumn? My little helper! When did you arrive? I’m so glad to see you,” he said as he hurried over toward her. They shared a heartwarming hug and then he held out his hand to Landers. “Who might this be?” “Madrid, this is my friend, Father Ben Landers. He came with me.” Then she beamed to Landers, “Madrid taught me all about gardens and flowers. He even helped me make mud pies!” He put his finger to his lips, “Sh. It is our secret, ?” “I do! I’ll never tell, but Ben keeps all my secrets.” “I’m glad you have a reliable confidant!” The man nodded, “So, are you home to stay?” “No. I have a job in Merton at a Retirement Home. It’s a wonderful place. Now, when you don’t want rake anymore, you can come up there and I’ll take care of you.” “I would love to have you take care of me, but I’ve heard of those Dakota winters. My old Filipino bones wouldn’t be happy with that.” He asked, “Will you have a large garden there? What are the best flowers that grow there?” “I haven’t seen many, because I have been so sappy.” “Oh, my little helper, that is when you need flowers the most!” “Maybe Father Landers would know,” Autumn suggested. “There are gorgeous lilacs and peonies.” Landers explained, “But some of our friends have greenhouses.” “What do they raise?” Madrid asked.

“Some flowers, vegetables and one man even is growing tropical fruit trees.” “Are the trees doing well?” Landers laughed, “We don’t know yet. It has only been a few months.” “You and Riza have to come visit sometime soon. You would love my friends,” Autumn bubbled. “We would enjoy that, when we can.” Madrid nodded, “Oh, you must see that azalea that you helped me transplant. Autumn was my very best helper in the garden. Weren’t you?” “I sure loved it,” she agreed, “But I don’t know how much help I was.” “You grew into the job. As a little tyke, you mostly were company, but when you were older, you were a great help.” The three visited in the garden and Madrid showed them around with pride. He and Autumn discussed many of the plants as if they were old friends. Landers enjoyed listening to them and saw an Autumn who was in her element, relaxed, and fun. It was good to see this other side of Autumn. They were called to lunch by Riza. Madrid said, “I hope we have time to visit more before you go back.” Autumn smiled, “Me, too.” Then she hesitated, “Madrid, you and Riza are Catholic, aren’t you?” “We are.” “Father hasn’t asked my parents, but that probably wouldn’t be a good idea. He’d like to go to Mass. I told him there is only Dannonville Christian, Bethel Assembly of God, and Calvary Southern Baptist here. May I ask where you go?” “We go to Benton Ridge. It’s only about twenty miles from here to the Southwest. It is on Mill Road, Autumn. Mass every hour and a half beginning at six in the morning. Last one is at noon, but that is too late for me. I get too hungry for that!” Madrid teased, “I went that late once and the growling of my stomach drowned out Father Hanley!”

At lunch, they gathered around a round table with a white tablecloth. In the center was a small vase of gorgeous flowers. Riza came out and poured their iced teas, before going back to bring the shrimp salads. When she placed the salad plate before Autumn, the young woman jumped up and gave Riza a huge hug. “You ed!” Riza beamed, “Of course, I did. It’s our special recipe!” Grace raised her eyebrows in disapproval, “Autumn, please sit down and maintain your composure.” “Sorry Mother.” Autumn sat down, “Ben, Riza and I figured out the recipe for this dressing ourselves. You should have seen it! We worked on it all day!” Landers smiled, “I’m anxious to try it.” “You’ll just love it! I know! You have to give me your opinion.” Landers raised his eyebrow, “Or should I just tell you something good?” “I want a true opinion, like I did with your turkey.” Riza had served everyone and returned to the kitchen. Without a thought, Landers took Autumn’s hand. He held out his hand to Ronald, who just looked at him, but Landers continued to say grace. When he finished, he made the sign on of the cross. Grace took a sharp breath, as Autumn said amen. Grace said condescendingly, “We don’t allow those cult signs in our home.” Autumn went on, without hesitation, “Oh Mother. Everyone says grace all the time in North Dakota. We all hold hands and say amen when it is finished. It is very nice. And you know, it isn’t a cult thing. We do a similar thing at our church, but we don’t make the sign of the cross. I’m sure you simply forgot.” Grace paled and Ronald thought a minute, “Well, it was a fine blessing over a good meal. Wasn’t it, Grace ?” She looked at her husband as if he had sat down with Lucifer himself, and Autumn knew that they didn’t really approve, but at least they wouldn’t have a fit about it anymore. She had decided that she didn’t care how they felt about it.

It wasn’t a sin. That was something they could get over or not. They began to eat their salad and after a couple bites, Landers said, “It is very good. Is the secret ingredient ginger?” She looked at him with a surprised smile, “How did you know? I have to tell Riza that you guessed it right off. No wonder you won the Pit Meal Category.” “What is the Pit Meal category?” Her father asked, hoping to find something they could talk about that wouldn’t put his wife in a coma. “The group of friends has a cooking competition every summer. Another priest, Father Bart and I entered our Marinated Turkey this year. We were fortunate to win in that category. And Autumn and Clarence won in the Dessert Category with their Mud Pies.” “Oh, is that why you needed the recipe?” Grace asked. “Yes,” Autumn nodded, “But Clarence and I may not enter next year! We had to make twenty pies! We were pretty tired of it when we were finished.” Landers said, “Maybe, but the pie was excellent.” “What does this Clarence do? Is he a businessman?” Mr. Simms asked. Autumn giggled, “No. He is nine-years old. He works for cousin Darrell and he is the coolest kid you could ever meet. I have a photo of him in my purse. Let me show you.” Before they could say no, Autumn ran to her purse and retrieved the photo of them with their ribbon. Mrs. Simms looked at it and raised her eyebrow, “My. Oh my.” “His name is Clarence Grey Hawk. You know what? His goal is to read the whole library! So far he has read about a hundred books!” “That’s an ambitious goal. Sounds like he is making an effort. Many don’t,” her father stammered, “So, how do you make this Pit Meal thing?” Landers explained how they marinated the turkey and then buried it in a bed of hot coals for several hours. “It is a lot of work but it has a wonderful flavor.”

“Maybe you could write it down for me. I might want to try that sometime,” Ronald suggested. “Certainly. I don’t know the marinade recipe off the top of my head, but I will call Bart and ask.” Landers nodded, “He is quite a cook.” “Do you priests cook for yourselves?” Ronald asked. “No, Sister Abigail takes care of us, but we do cook.” Landers continued, “She makes us clean up after ourselves though, so that takes the fun out of it.” “Where do you live?” “In the rectory, next to St. Johns. There are four of us who live there. With me are Sister Abigail, Father Bart, and Father Vicaro. St. Johns also has an elementary and high school in Merton. That is mostly Bart’s department.” “Seems to be a lot of staff for such a small community.” Ronald pointed out, “Hardly seems cost effective.” Landers smiled, “St. John’s has a very large drawing area. Vicaro did it all himself for years, but since he suffered a broken hip, he has slowed down a lot. The diocese sent Bart out to help him, mostly with the school, and then later, asked me to them. Sister has been there for years.” “I’ve heard that many of the nuns have illicit relationships with priests,” Mrs. Simms suggested smugly. Landers smiled, knowing she was baiting him, “Of course. Every time any two people meet, they have a relationship. Factually, you and I have a relationship right now! But I know what you are referring to. Sister and Vicaro are dear friends, but trust me, there is nothing romantic in their relationship. While all of us priests at St. John’s love Sister, it’s like family.” “Oh,” Grace stammered, “I just heard…” “I know. People tend to think that we are freaks. We’re just people. Our lifestyle isn’t the same as the general population, but we are people, just the same.” “I guess I never knew one.”

“Now you do.” Landers gave her a kind grin, “I hope that you feel that you can ask me anything. I’d like us to be friends.” “I’ll consider it. Why does Autumn call you Ben? Isn’t that a bit familiar?” Landers answered. “It’s my name. Autumn and I are good friends, so of course, she’d call me by my name. You may call me Ben, too, if you like.” “I’ll call you Mister Landers, thank you.” Grace responded, “You are not my father and I wouldn’t want anyone to interpret that we are friends.” He almost chuckled, “I doubt they would, Mrs. Simms.” Ronald was almost amused by that and asked, “How is the school funded?” “There is a minimum tuition, but we often waive much of it. It is cost prohibitive for families to send their children to Minot or Bismarck, because that would include housing. Besides, those schools aren’t large enough to accommodate everyone. The rest is from donations and the Diocese.” “Charity, then,” Ronald concluded derisively. “Yes, that’s true. We believe in Jesus’ words, “And now remains faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity,” from I Corinthians 13:13.” Landers continued, “Some Biblical versions replace love for charity, but it is all about the same.” “I think folks should earn their way,” Ronald pointed out. “I do, too. We don’t just give the children an A in their studies. They have to earn them. We simply give them the opportunity to earn them.” Landers nodded. “We actually pay most of our own way. We have fund raisers throughout the years and projects. Last year, our students raised a few thousand dollars selling Christmas ornaments. I tell you by December twenty-fifth, I didn’t care if I ever saw another ornament in my life.” Mrs. Simms expression changed, “What percentage did they make? I mean, cost to intake?” “About 89%. We gathered pine cones, which in North Dakota is no easy feat.

Then the children painted the petal things and while the paint was damp, sprinkled them with sparkles. Then we strung string for hanging. We started out with ribbon, but it turned out to be difficult to thread. Sister found some metallic heavy thread, and we switched to that.” “Would it be something a library could do? For a fund-raiser?” “I don’t know why not. You shouldn’t have a problem finding pine cones of various sizes here. I’d be happy to show you how to do it, if you’d like.” Mrs. Simms pursed her lips and Landers had to smile to himself. She looked very much like her daughter when she was trying to maintain a stubborn position on something. Then the woman said, “I’ll think it over and maybe discuss it with the ladies on the committee this evening.” With that, she looked Autumn over, “I do hope that you brought something to wear that is not so pedestrian. We have a cocktail party this evening at the Club. Of course, you will come. Maybe Riza can fix up something for you to wear. Mister Landers should not wear this religious garb. It isn’t appropriate. You can wear a suit and you will introduce yourself as Mr. Landers.” “Mother, I will not be going to the Club. I don’t care to see anyone other than my family. I’m not on a social visit.” “But darling, Vander Vorsts were about to be your family.” “I really don’t want to see them. I know it isn’t their fault, but I just can’t. Please understand.” “Nonsense, darling.” Grace insisted, “I won’t hear of it. You will dress and meet with all our friends. They are fine people and will be glad to see you. You need to put all this nonsense behind you. There is no point in making a fuss.” “Mother? Don’t you understand? Brad was not just a philanderer, but a murderer. Killer. A criminal! That’s more than nonsense. At least three women and two babies are dead, buried, and gone forever. And they died at his hand. He likely would’ve murdered me, too!” Autumn tried to keep her tone level. “It isn’t over. Prepare yourself, because the detective in Corpus Christi said the District Attorney there are reopening the investigation. It will reflect on Vander Vorsts, through Brad’s estate.”

Mrs. Simms muttered to her daughter accusingly, “How could you bring this on our community?” Autumn snapped, “Holy God, Woman! Don’t you get it? Brad brought it on the community! In his defense, I doubt he even thought of that! He was a narcissistic sociopath. When the news breaks, I hope you’re prepared for the fallout.” “Darling, this is so tiresome. No one will make as much fuss about it as you!” “Wait and see. The rest of the world frowns on serial killers, whether their last names are Vander Vorst or not. Mother, I wonder if they served you a platter of manure, that you wouldn’t ask for whipped cream on top!” Mrs. Simms started to cry and Autumn was getting ready to bolt. Landers and Ronald were both in awe at how quickly the conversation had imploded and both were rendered speechless. However, Landers had the presence of mind to grab Autumn’s hand before she leapt out of her chair. Ronald Simms, who rarely displayed emotion but did wield authority, stood, “Stop. All of you! Grace, we’ll go to the cocktail party. Autumn and Ben do not have to attend. I’m not so certain I feel comfortable talking to Vander Vorst myself tonight. You will accept my position on this. I insist. And Autumn, while I agree with the essence of what you said, I don’t appreciate your crude analogies. Show your mother respect. Now sit down. Both of you eat in silence.” Then he sat back down and put his napkin back on his lap. After a short glower, he turned to Landers, “So, what else does your school do to raise funds, Ben? May I call you that?” “Of course,” Ben nodded, trying to conceal his aghast at the family dynamics. “You call me Ron or Ronald.” Then he scrambled to make conversation, “How much does it cost to educate a student per year?”

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The conversation stumbled on for a time, but the tension did subside. When Riza came back to check on them, Ronald said, “Riza, could I ask you to see if these two need to have some laundry done? While traveling, that can become a problem.” “Of course,” Riza nodded. “Will Miss Autumn be in her room?” “Yes, and I think Ben will be comfortable in Oren’s room.” Landers turned to Autumn, “Are we staying?” She only nodded the affirmative, but added, “We need to talk to Crandall before we make a move, don’t you think?” “We can arrange that.” Mrs. Simms pursed her lips, “Of course, we will plan on you attending church with us tomorrow, Autumn.” “No, Mother. I am not be going to church with you. Everyone will be there. I told you I don’t want to visit with everyone. I thought that I would go with Ben to Benton Ridge for Mass.” Both her parents head spun in her direction, but she continued matter-of-factly, “And do not worry. I’m not about to become Catholic. I’ll stay in the car and read, if it really worries you. However, I need to say this. I love you both, very much. I appreciate that you love me and are concerned about me, but I need to make the decisions in my own life. Good or bad. I promise I will consider your points of view, but I hope that you can love me enough to appreciate mine. We all know they are not the same. I don’t think that any of us are all right, or all wrong. We are just different. Can we do that?” Her mother was horrified, so much so that she said nothing. Her father raised his eyebrows and took his time to answer. “You’ll always be my delightful Autumn

Beatrice. I see that now you realize what I’ve known for some time. We follow different pipers. I’ve always been proud of your feistiness and eagerness to explore life. I’m sorry that you felt you had to find trust in someone other than us. We’ve become to entrenched in our way. Feel free to go to church wherever you prefer. I’ll forever be grateful to Alma and George for being there for you and for you, Ben, who offered her the that we didn’t. Autumn, you have my blessing. I’m sure your mother will agree after she thinks about it. Won’t you, dear? Ben, I’d like to visit with you in private some time, as you wish.” Grace grimaced. A betting person would not have considered her agreement to be near a certainty. She sat there, vacillating between a scowl and a pout. Landers quietly said, “That was kind to say. We can visit anytime that is convenient for you. After lunch, I’ll bring our bags in.” “I can have Madrid do that.” “We can manage, can’t we, Autumn?” “Sure. Right after lunch.” Autumn smiled.

They all turned when they heard someone in the hall. Riza opened the patio door and there was an athletically-built young man with light brown hair and big brown eyes, who looked much like Ronald. He was sporting a big grin and opened his arms to Autumn, “Girl! How’s my little sister! Mother said you had an “emergency!” Shanley Simms chuckled as he gave his sister, who had run over to him, a big hug. “Did you get caught up a tree or something?” “What are you talking about?” Autumn was obviously pleased to see her brother. “Sass, meet my friend, Ben Landers from Merton.” Sass shook his hand in a friendly manner and then became serious, “I’m sorry, Father. There’s a no return policy on this one!” Landers grinned, and tried to keep from falling on his knees in thanks for the breath of fresh air, “No, we’re keeping her!” “Wow!” Sass wiped pretend sweat from his brow, “That was a worry! No

wonder Mother was so concerned.” “Mother called you?” Autumn asked incredibly. “About an hour ago. She said to come quickly as there was an emergency!” Autumn stood back and squinted her eyes, “Where were you? You only live twenty minutes away! You wouldn’t be much help if I was up a tree!” “Girl, I had to shower and shave before I came! I didn’t want to appear on the TV news looking like a bum!” Riza giggled, “Would Mr. Shanley like me to bring him a plate?” “No thanks, Riza. I’ll just eat off Girl’s plate.” He pulled a chair up from the side and put it by his sister. “I’d like a cup of coffee when you have time though.” He hugged his mother and patted his father’s shoulder and then sat down by Autumn. He gave Landers a quizzical look, “She isn’t going to be a nun, is she? Because I can tell you things….” “No,” Landers chuckled, “Nothing like that. She already has a job at as the day RN at Merton Retirement Home. It will start in September.” Her father nodded and smiled with approval, “That is good news.” Sass shrugged, “Maybe for you, but don’t know about those poor old folks. I know I wouldn’t want Girl bringing me a bedpan.” Autumn crossed her eyes, “That’s something you need never worry about.” Riza brought him some coffee and he took the fork out of the relish dish and helped himself to Autumn’s salad. His mother almost collapsed, “Shanley, why do you act like you were raised by wolves?” “Nature versus nurture, or whatever that is. Guess nature won out!” “I don’t know where I went wrong with my two youngest,” Grace sighed. “Oh, I’m not so bad. It’s Girl that causes all the trouble,” Sass grinned.

“You’ll be convinced when you hear her latest,” Grace said in all seriousness to her son. “You will be appalled.” “What did you do now, Girl?” Sass put his arm around his sister, “I can’t imagine what you could get into that Sam and Joey couldn’t handle. Let alone require an exorcism!” “It isn’t what I did.” Autumn swatted him, “It’s about Brad.” Sass’s demeanor changed instantly and he groaned with disdain, “Mr. Wonderful? What happened? I never thought he was half what he thought he was, but even he can’t do much from beyond the grave!” “He did all these things before he died, Sass,” Autumn started to tear up and asked to leave the table. “I’m so sorry, Autumn. That was thoughtless. Please forgive me.” Shanley said genuinely. “You know, I’ve never had patience with anything Brad.” Landers asked her if she was okay, but she said she just needed a minute. “Ben, could you explain it to Sass. I don’t want to have to go through it again.” “Are you sure? Do I need to get your medication?” “No, I’m fine. Promise. I won’t run off.” Then she left the room and Landers took a minute before he returned to the conversation. Grace was sullen, but both Simms men were just mesmerized by the exchange. Finally, Sass asked, very seriously, “What medication? Did Brad give her a disease?” “No. Nothing that simple,” Landers sighed. “Autumn has been having many problems with anxiety. Her psychiatrist gave me some medication for her. She bottles things up, until they explode. She was improving until the box came from Vander Vorsts. Then she almost went over the edge. This last week has been enough to melt Rosary beads!” Sass interrupted, “First, what do I call you? My name is Sass. It really is Shanley Albert Simms, but everyone but Mother calls me Sass.”

“You may call me Ben, Landers, or Father. I answer to most anything.” “Good to know. Back to this deal, can you tell me what’s going on?” Landers started from the beginning and was explaining up to visiting the police station when Autumn returned. He stopped and took her hand, “How are you doing?” “I’m good. Thank you for explaining it all again.” Autumn asked, “Should I go get the folder for him to look at?” “Why don’t I give you a hand?” Ronald said. Landers finished telling Sass the whole thing. By the time he was finished, Ronald and Autumn had brought the bags into the hallway and returned to the patio. She handed the folder to Sass, who looked through it, his face becoming darker and the furrows in his brow deepening as he read. Then he gravely closed it and handed it back to Autumn. He said seriously, “I knew his treatment of women was abominable, but I have to say, even I never thought he was this bad.” “Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Ronald demanded. “I tried to, several times. No one would listen to me. that time when I told you that us guys had heard him bragging about getting that Becker girl drunk and taking advantage of her? You told me to keep vicious rumors to myself.” “Oh.” Ronald stirred his lettuce around in the dressing, “I do. I thought you boys were all envious of him.” “Dad. He was an arrogant bully.” “But his parents are such fine people,” Grace gasped, holding her chest. “I can’t believe this.” Sass frowned and snapped, “Well, believe it. For heaven’s sake Mom, fine people can raise a rotten kid. It happens.” “I do wish you wouldn’t call me Mom. My name is Mother.”

Sass was getting angry, “Your name is Grace and you’re my mom. I know it means a lot to you to have the women in town approve of you, but some of them aren’t worthy to wipe your feet. I don’t know why you kowtow to them.” “Sass,” Ronald said sternly, “That is quite enough! You know we don’t believe in raising our voices and arguing.” The young chemical engineer looked at his father and shook his head. He said very matter-of-factly, “No, we don’t. We sweep things under the carpet! Just think for one second if that bastard had married Autumn! We might be mourning her death. Some things are worth getting riled about.” Grace ’s eyes flashed in anger, “Shanley, where did you learn this behavior?” “I think from watching you worry about all the old bags in the neighborhood and thinking they are the end all to everything. What ? We are your family? Why do you always take their side over ours?” “I don’t. I simply realize you children overreact.” “Would you have overreacted when Autumn’s decomposed body washed up on a shore somewhere?” Sass shook his head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come over. I just can’t act like you want. If you really want to know, I’m surprised someone didn’t kill the creep long ago! If he had pulled something like that on Girl, I can tell you I would have!” Landers interjected, “Autumn and I are rather certain that someone did. In our investigations, we have uncovered at least two young men, brothers of two different victims, that both had green cars who had the opportunity to drive him off the road.” “Did you report it to the police?” Ronald asked. Autumn answered, “No and we aren’t going to because it is only speculation. It’d be horribly unjust if someone was falsely arrested on top of everything else. Besides, I think he got what he deserved.” “Sounds good to me,” Sass said. “The only reason I never went ballistic before was no one would listen to me. I tried to tell you that he had bragged in the locker room that as long as he married a respectable girl, he would get his

inheritance. That’s why he wanted to marry Autumn. How do you think I felthearing someone talk about my sister that way! You have no idea! Every time I tried to talk to you guys, you said I was just jealous of him!” Grace gasped, “You mean other people heard that? What did they think?” “Who gives a damn who heard it? Is that more important than that he said it?” Sass asked, “Yes, other guys heard it. The whole locker room all did. It was hard to hear our little voices over the great accolades that always surrounded him. No one wanted to hear that little angel had wings of buzzard feathers.” Grace started to cry and left the table. Before Ronald went to look after his wife, he said, “You may be right, but you have to know how difficult this is for your Mother. She was not accepted in this town when we first married, for quite a while. She had to work very hard to be included. Somewhere along the line, it became too important for her. But she really only did it for us. She wanted to help me in my work and to assure her children never had to face that prejudice. I wish you’d try to be understanding. I want to talk to you all, so don’t leave.” Landers watched the expression of the siblings and realized they had heard it all before. Whether or not they truly understood, he couldn’t judge. Sass was quiet for a bit and then said, “I’m sorry. I’ve only made things worse.” He gave his sister a hug, “If I had any idea he was that bad, I would have stopped you from marrying him.” “I know, Sass. I know how it goes to try to speak up.” She turned to Ben, “I think we should leave.” “Autumn, your father specifically asked that we stay so he can talk to us.” “Dad does that, but I know what he is going to say. We need to help Mom keep her head in the sand. I always picture one of these meetings as us all standing around an ostrich with little shovels, just scooping it as fast as we can.” Sass said, “But if you’re going to stay, I will, too.” Autumn looked at her salad, “What a horrible waste of a great salad.”

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The three sat with the remains of their lunch until Riza suggested they leave the table. “You travelers may want to change, so I can wash whatever laundry you have. Mr. Shanley, your father suggested that you may wish to call Mandy. He decided that he wants to have the entire family here this afternoon. Mr. Simms already phoned their regrets to Chesterfields about the cocktail party this evening. They’ll not be attending.” Autumn shot a look of panic in Landers direction and he asked, “What exactly does he want?” Ronald overheard the question as he came back onto the patio. “Riza, could you bring us iced tea or something?” Autumn offered to help and stood up quickly. Landers grabbed her hand, “You aren’t going to sprint, are you?” She shook her head no, “I just want to help clear the table.” The ladies cleared the dishes and Sass went to call Mandy. Ron and Landers were alone and walked out onto the grass. “It is a beautiful yard you have here. Madrid and Autumn gave me a tour of the gardens earlier. They’re fantastic.” “Thank you. You know, I haven’t been down to walk through them in years.” He looked worn and tired as he spoke, “Grace and I worked ourselves silly to get all this and now we don’t even enjoy it. I imagine you think we’re ridiculous people.” “Not at all,” Landers replied. “I see how you and Autumn are with each other. I have never paid enough attention to her to read her moods. You have a bond. That’s obvious.” “We do. Although Joey and Sammy can read her better than I can.”

“George and Alma never had much money, you know, but they raised some fine people. I used to think we were doing it better, but now I wonder. Grace and I were poor as church mice when we moved here and I opened my office. Folks were not much into Financial Advisors back then, especially with the Stock Market crash so fresh in everyone’s minds. I worked at the local bank part time and also sold real estate. Grace, like Alma, is from the hill country. The ladies here had a difficult time keeping their sneers from being obvious and shunned her repeatedly. It took about six years before I finally could work just at my office and not take part time work. We began to do well and the children were young. Grace withstood being ridiculed by these women until Oren was in the first grade. When she realized that these society women were not allowing him to play with their children, she nearly had a breakdown. She vowed to show them her children were a good as theirs.” “Did she see a counselor?” “No. Like I said, we had four kids and were just beginning to get our heads above water. The nearest counselor was in Atlanta and we only had the one car. So, she worked it out herself. She became more like them than they are! I can’t say I liked it, but within six months, she was making progress. Grace became what she is today, but she had to change herself in order to do it. Now, she and the children are accepted as part of the fabric of Dannonville. You know, I came here because it was a wealthy community. It was perfect for my business. I should’ve chosen a more natural one, with all levels of society.” “Ron, I think you made a wise decision for your business. Society at all levels is very cliquish. I’ve been in ghettos, that are very much that way. None of us like being out of our comfort zone or allowing strangers into ours.” Landers said, “Sass seems like a fine person, as is Autumn.” “Since it’s just us, I need to say this. I can tell by the way you look at each other, that you have feelings for each other. I’m aware that Roman Catholic priests cannot marry. I’d be most upset if you were setting Autumn up to be hurt. I know I don’t seem like it, but I do care very much for my daughter.” Landers listened and nodded, “I know you do and yes, Autumn and I do have feelings for each other, but we know the boundaries. I give you my word, I’d never do anything to harm Autumn. I also realize that right now I’m safe for her to trust. She needs that now. Once she gets this mess sorted out with Brad, she

will get back to living. Then she will find younger, available men she’d prefer to be with. I want her to have a full and happy life, and since I made my vow, I can’t offer her that. I hope you understand, however, that I care for her immensely.” “I can see that. I guess I do notice some things. I’m glad she has you right now. You seem to be decent.” Riza interrupted them, “Father Landers, Sass and Autumn took the bags upstairs. I hate to interrupt, but I’d like to get your clothes in the wash.” “Okay. I’ll do that.” The shower felt good and Landers was glad to change into some clean jeans and a casual shirt. He went over what Ronald said in his mind. He was concerned that he and Autumn were too obvious about how they felt, but also realized that since this household was mostly void of any emotions, it probably was more pronounced to them. He really enjoyed Sass. Even though he and Autumn both were strong personalities, able to stand up to their parent’s regulations, he knew that they both were very swayed by them, just the same. He wondered about Oren and Marion. From what he had surmised, they seemed to buy into the whole thing more than Sass and Autumn. He gathered his laundry and checked himself in the mirror before he went out into the hall. ‘Well Landers, you’re about to find out.’ He carried his laundry downstairs and was met by Riza who offered to take them. “I can carry them,” he said. “I really appreciate you doing this for us.” “Come. I’ll show you the way. Washing is nothing. I just put it in a machine and push a button. If I had to beat it on a washboard, you could do your own.” “I don’t believe that’s true,” Landers chuckled. Then she stopped walking, “I’m so thankful that you came with Miss Autumn. It would’ve worked out very differently had you not been here. I never liked Mr. Vander Vorst. He was great on the outside, but never seemed to have an inner self. When I looked him in the eye, it seemed nearly hollow inside. It was all show and pretense. I’m so thankful that he didn’t hurt her, except emotionally. I don’t know how I’d feel knowing I’d been about to marry a murderer.” The

woman shook her head, “A person just never knows, do they?” “No Riza, they certainly don’t.” He went out to the back patio again and found everyone but Grace there. They were all visiting quietly and Sass laughed, “You look like a real person!” “Thanks, I think.” Landers chuckled, “You look relatively human, too.” Sass stammered. “Now I want to crawl in a hole.” “Ah, so not human!” Ben laughed. “Actually, I wear jeans a lot. I have a horse now! His name is Redemption. Autumn helped pick out his name.” “Redemption.” Sass raised his eyebrows, “Not bad, Girl.” Landers chuckled, “May I ask why you call her Girl?” “I really wanted a baby brother to play with. So Mom and Dad came home with this one. I was deeply offended. I wouldn’t even talk to her until Madrid told me that little girls can play as well as little boys. I just had to show her how. That’s probably why she turned out to be a tomboy!” “You have to meet Rain Harrington, back in Merton!” Autumn bubbled. “She out tomboys me by a long shot! She even does auto body repair! And Sass, she is gorgeous.” He studied his sister and then looked to Landers, “Ben, is she lying?” “Not in the least. She could easily win Miss America. She wanted to be in the Merchant Marine, but her folks wouldn’t allow it. Actually, I think she could have handled it. Instead she is a farmhand and works at the auto body shop.” Autumn explained, “You know what? She was buried in a landslide! Can you imagine? She was all bruised and bandaged when we met, but still beautiful.” “I didn’t know they had landslides in North Dakota,” Ron frowned. “It was a hill of rock and shale that let loose during a rain storm. She was out there trying to save a baby calf when the side of the butte let go. Her sweetheart

found her almost completely buried under three feet of rock and mud,” Landers clarified. “Isn’t that something?” Autumn said, “A lot more exciting than making twenty mud pies!” Then they talked about the cooking contest until someone opened the sliding door. “The children and I are here,” Marion, their sister announced as she came out. “Craig will be along in a bit. He has some work to finish up.” The woman who was nearly thirty and looked very much like Autumn, but thinner, went over and gave her a slight hug. “I was so surprised to hear that you were back already.” Then she turned to Landers, “And you are this Catholic priest I heard about? You don’t look like one.” Landers stood, to shake her hand, “I am dressed casually.” Marion looked at her younger sister with disapproval, “Leave it to you. We can always count on you to rattle the cages.” Autumn never responded to the comment, but asked, “Where are the kids?” “My children are antagonizing Riza. I believe they want some sweets. She will bring them out in a few minutes.” Marion was wearing a sun dress, sandals, and looked quite pretty. She sat on a white rattan cushioned chair and continued, “Mother said that you have caused quite a stir this time.” Ronald interrupted, “I’d like to explain this once, when everyone arrives. For the record, it was nothing of Autumn’s creation.” Riza came with two children in tow. There was a dark-haired boy about three and a girl with long brown curls down to her waist about six, The instant the kids saw Autumn, they ran to her. She hugged them both enthusiastically and both kids began talking at once. Marion shook her head, “Children. Please contain yourselves. Autumn may want

to visit with the adults and not have you pester her.” Autumn said, “We’re just fine. Aren’t we guys?” They both eagerly nodded and then she said, “I want you to meet a friend of mine. This is Ben Landers. Ben, this little man is Jesse and the curly one is Merrikay. Oh, and my sister Marion Bettmon.” Jesse’s dark eyes squinted at her, “Did you forget I have curls, too, Auntie? Mother just cuts them short.” “I’m sorry, I did forget,” Autumn ran her finger through his hair, “You do have very curly hair, Jesse.” Then Jesse looked Landers over and whispered to his aunt, “Does Ben know how to play?” She smiled, “I happen to know he is very good at playing. Shall we ask Ben and Uncle Sass to play with us?” Both children thought that was a grand idea, and actually so did Ben and Sass. “What about croquet?” Sass suggested. “Who will help me set it up?” All five volunteered and ran off to get the croquet set out of the storage shed. It left Ronald to visit with Marion, but that seemed like a good idea for everyone concerned. The five got the set out and were industriously setting the game up on the lawn, when Grace came out to the patio. Marion gave her mother a warm embrace and then held her hand, until Riza brought lemonade for her. It only took a little while for the players to begin. They were having a good time, although there was little that followed any sort of rule. Mandy Turner, Sass’s fiancée, arrived next and while she took an iced tea, she quickly ed the croquet crew. Autumn and Ben both noticed she was not greeted enthusiastically by the women on the patio. She was almost as tall as Sass with short blonde hair and big blue eyes and wore casual linen sportswear. She seemed to be a happy, out-going person. She and Sass got along easily and teased each other a lot. A bit later, Marion’s husband, Craig, arrived with Oren and Juliette and their children. Play had to stop for introductions. Thirty-three year old Oren looked like his father and was very reserved. Since he had just come from work, he was

wearing his business suit, but hung the jacket over a chair and loosened his tie. He was also a financial advisor and vice president in his father’s firm. Juliette was a petite and very striking brunette. She had with her two children, Loren, a boy of about seven and a little girl Phoebe, who was five. There were introductions all around and Sass asked the newcomers if they wanted to play croquet, too. Loren and Phoebe did, as well as Craig. He was a friendly man who was a partner in an aeronautics company. Craig was down to earth, while Marion soared high above the horizon. Juliette was able to hold her own in Marion’s orbit while Mandy was blatantly disinterested in their carrying on. They played for about half an hour before Ronald called time. “Riza will keep an eye on the children and we need to discuss a situation that has come to light. I would like everyone to meet in the library in fifteen minutes. Autumn and Ben, could you gather the information that you have to share with everyone.” Landers was very thankful to get some time alone with Autumn. As they walked to her room, Autumn smiled. “My family is something else, huh?” “They’re okay, just not like ordinary folks.” Landers nodded, “I understand you a lot better now. I see why you bottle things up until you are ready to blow!” They went in her room and retrieved the folder from the dresser. She gave him an odd look and then gave him a hug. “I’m so very glad you’re here.” “I am, too, although it was shaky there for a bit.” He chuckled, “I thought about breaking into a run! And I’m not kidding!” “Wait until this family meeting. You may yet.”

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Landers did a double take when he walked into the library. Even though the situation with Brad was important, Landers thought the board room scenario was quite an overreaction. However, there they were, seated around a large hardwood conference table, complete with water glasses and covered canisters of iced water at every place beside the legal pads and pens. The other adults seemed to accept it as commonplace, except Mandy and him. They exchanged an anxious look, but took their places. Ronald sat at the head of the table and Grace sat on his right. When everyone was seated, he began. “An issue has been presented to us that I felt we all need to consider. While there is little that we need to do, it’s important that we are forewarned when this becomes known in our community. We will all be faced with it. This way, we can come to an agreement of how to handle it.” Marion added with an accusatory smirk, “Another Autumn fiasco.” Craig frowned, “Marion, see what this is about before we reach a conclusion.” Ronald continued, “A wise choice, Craig. Since it is difficult for Autumn to talk about, I would ask that Ben explain it to us. Could you do that?” Landers would have rather gone to help Madrid fertilize turnips, but began anyway. He retold the story, trying not to leave out many details. Unlike Sass, who listened to the whole thing before asking questions, Oren immediately assumed the role of defense council. He was an intelligent man, but not about to take Autumn’s word for anything. He immediately chose Brad’s side. By the time, Landers told about the visit to the docks and then the police station, even Oren was beginning to listen. Sass ed around the clippings from the newspaper. Oren studied them meticulously and then set them down. When he studied the copies of the police photos, he looked at his father, “My God! I honestly believe the man was a multiple murderer.” “Yes, son.” Ronald nodded, “That was my conclusion.”

Juliette and Marion gasped, but Mandy had already been convinced. Mandy spoke up at this point, “I know that I’m not yet part of this family and my opinions have never been well received, but I have to say I’m amazed that you all didn’t believe Autumn straight off. Why in heavens name, would you even begin to think that Autumn made this up? I clearly don’t understand you people!” Sass took her hand and gave her a slight frown. She shrugged, “Well, I don’t.” Grace, Marion, and Juliette glared at her, but Ronald said, “You are quite right, Mandy. Somehow our family has become so entrenched in Dannonville’s society that we take their word over our own common sense. Our family is made up of our loved ones. We need to begin acting that way. If Dannonville’s finest don’t like it, they can get over it.” Grace ’s eyes widened, “Ronald! We would be shunned.” “Not anymore, Grace. These folks need us as much as we need them. I am not about to let this sort of thing continue. We do not take all of our cues from the Vander Vorsts, Carpenters, and Waters anymore. If anyone will be shunned, it will be Vander Vorsts.” Ronald continued, “From what Landers told me, it is likely that the police are reopening the investigations of Olivia Jerriman’s death. There was a large insurance settlement from Olivia which Brad collected and those moneys will be contested. The money will be taken from Brad’s estate. It is very likely that Patti’s family will charge his estate with civil charges surrounding her death, and who knows Brad’s liability in Camille’s presumptive suicide. Apparently the Atlanta police are reexamining it as possible foul play. Sadly, there is a possibility there may be others that we don’t know about yet. Obviously since he is deceased, he will not be facing a trial, but there will be civil suits filed. They will be public record and the entire story may come out. We need to brace ourselves for the backlash, because there will be one. Autumn turned over the box that Vander Vorsts sent to her which contained much incriminating evidence. The police in Corpus Christi now have it.” Oren leaned back, “That’s ridiculous. Brad is dead. Why wouldn’t it go away?” Ronald explained, “Money, and a lot of it. Being found liable for someone’s death in civil court can lead to very large settlements. From what I have heard, he was responsible for at least two deaths. You can mark my words, this will all become common knowledge in Dannonville.”

Sass spoke up, “Not to mention, maybe the Becker girl will gain her voice about her assault, and there may be others. I can about guarantee that he will no longer be the golden boy of Dannonville.” Oren snapped at him, “That’s what this is all about! You never liked it that he was looked up, to while you were just ordinary.” Sass snarled, “You idiot! I knew him! If he had been half of what he claimed to be, I would’ve been proud to know him. He made me sick and by the way, a few other guys my age knew him, too. Trust me, you don’t want to be the last one carrying his flag after that fort is burned! The minute this breaks, there’ll be stories all over the place and most of them will be true.” Craig had been listening intently, “May I ask, Ronald, what stance you think we should take? I mean as a family? For my part, I’d be hard put to say anything nice about the creep.” “I think the best thing would be to Autumn and not make any comment to anyone either way. Let the thing play itself out.” Marion snorted, “That will never work! These people will be all over it. It will be the biggest news since the Liz Taylor and Eddie Fisher scandal! This little city will pound any juicy shred of gossip out of it.” Sass growled, “You should know.” “That is what we don’t want!” Ronald reprimanded him. “We’ll be torn apart and turned against each other. This has taught me that while I was looking for the success sign, I ignored what mattered. I don’t want us to go there anymore. I only hope it isn’t too late. I thank God that Brad didn’t kill Autumn. It could very likely have happened. We’ll never know, but I for one am grateful we didn’t have to find out. With a man like that, it seems that whenever something was no longer convenient for him, he took action.” Craig agreed, and then asked, “Will Autumn be here or in the Dakotas?” “I have a job in Merton and I intend to live there. I have made a statement to the police in Corpus Christi and I’ll be willing to help in any trials, but I won’t come back here to live.” Autumn’s voice began to shake, “I can’t see doing that.”

Landers took her hand, “I agree. It would be unwise for her to stay. She should be allowed to have her own life, free from this.” Marion glared at him, “So who made you her spokesman? What could you possibly know about her life?” “I did, Marion.” Autumn declared, “He knows more about me than you do!” “What are your qualifications?” Marion bulldogged. “What would a priest possibly know about life?” Autumn opened her mouth, but Landers shook his head and responded politely and calmly. “You want to know about my life? I’ll be glad to tell you. I have no secrets. I was left in a basket on the steps of a Catholic church when I was a baby. I have no idea who or where my parents are. I grew up in an orphanage and eventually became a priest myself. I have degrees in theology, psychology, psychiatry, and addiction. I was a chaplain in the military and then worked several years in the rehabilitation facility for veterans suffering from battle fatigue and addictions in San Diego. A year ago, I was burned out and asked to be reassigned. I am now assisting the parish priests in Merton. I have made friends with some wonderful people and the Jessups are among them. Through them, I met Autumn.” He looked directly at Marion, “So, you’re correct. I do not know Autumn’s life, but I do know her.” Marion had rarely been confronted in such a manner and didn’t really know how to respond. She looked to Craig who never flinched while Landers spoke and then Marion mumbled, “Well, she is my little sister. She is always the one that creates problems. I never did anything of that kind!” “But did she break laws, injure people, or that sort of thing? Or just play soccer and climb trees? Those aren’t sins, Marion.” Landers said. “I know what sins are!” Marion countered. “I don’t need a lecture from any twobit priest.” “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to give you one.” “He didn’t, Marion.” Craig rumbled, “For God’s sake, just once get off your high horse! If Brad had killed Autumn, then how would you have felt? And if you don’t take a stand, how stupid will you feel when the whole town turns on Brad

and you’re still ing him? Just knock it off. I’m with Ron, I’m tired of all this crap. The guy was horrible. Face it. Be thankful we didn’t end up as mourners.” Marion stared at her husband for a full minute and then nodded slowly, “I believe you may be right. But what will people think?” Now it was Oren who spoke up, “Probably how damned lucky we were that he didn’t murder Autumn! I can’t see where there is any reason that we need to think about this! I don’t give a damn what anyone thinks. I have no use for someone who pulls that. If he wasn’t dead, I would consider killing him myself! I can’t believe that I ever took his side! Once he got his inheritance or a big insurance policy, he likely would have murdered her, too.” “Oren!” Grace gasped. “Oh Mother! Get over yourself.” The poor woman almost collapsed and held out her hand to Ronald. He put both hands on his head and Marion moved over to console her mother. “Is there anything else to say?” Sass asked. “I want to thank Autumn and Ben for giving us a warning about what’s coming down the pike. I also want to apologize to Autumn for not telling her all I knew about Brad before she accepted his engagement. Mostly, I want to thank God for intervening so the marriage never happened. Thanks for being there for Girl, Ben, and putting up with us.” “Are they still investigating Brad’s accident? Did they ever find the green car?” Juliette asked. Ronald flashed a glance toward Autumn, “Ben and Autumn know of two men who not only motive but opportunity to drive him off the road.” “Are you going to tell the police?” Julie asked. “The police are aware of the presence of a green car and know who owns them.” Ben said, “But we did not tell them.” “No,” Ronald continued. “They both feel, as do I, that it would be speculation and could only cause more pain to innocent people. We will leave it to the

police. It is possible it was simply an accident, you know.” “Personally,” Craig said, “I’d like to give whoever did it a gold medal.” So, it was decided that the family would keep their own counsel with all this and only answer ‘no comment’ to any of the queries that were certain to come. They all decided it was wise for Autumn to return to North Dakota. Folks began to relax as the formal meeting was over. Mandy shook her head and gave Autumn a hug, “I wish we had more time together. I had only met you a couple times before you left. I hope we can be friends.” “You and Sass need to come visit,” Autumn said. “Plan on it,” Sass grinned, “I want to come up to watch my two cousins bite the dust with their big double wedding! Wow! And they are marrying sisters.” “One of the other priests at our parish is the brother to those sisters. It would be great if you’d come to the wedding. There’ll be a barn dance and all the trimmings. You haven’t lived until you have attended a clan wedding.” Ronald overheard, “It will be this fall. Grace and I had considered coming, but there is no hotel in Merton.” “Oh, there will be! The sheriff’s brother is refurbishing the Merton Hotel,” Landers explained. “What could a sheriff’s brother possible know about that?” Marion scoffed. “Cal was the founder of the Matterhorn Hotel, one of largest hotel chains in the US, until he retired.” Landers grinned, “I think you would really enjoy it.” “I’ve heard of the Matterhorn. It has a glorious reputation.” Marion continued amazement, “In Merton? We’d have to find a nanny to care for the children.” “No,” Autumn said, “Bring them along. There’ll be plenty of things for the kids. The clan loves children. I can introduce them to tons of kids.” Craig chuckled, “We’ll be there. Let your hair down, Marion. I’ve never been to a barn dance nor seen the prairies. I think it’d be a fun adventure.”

“If you say so,” she grimaced, “Mother, are you and Father going?” Ronald answered, “Of course. We’ll be staying with Alma and George. Besides, I want to see these horses I’ve heard about.” “Horses?” Oren asked. “Yes, Autumn has a horse named Traveller and I have one named Redemption. But there are a lot of horses there and if the weather permits, we can go on a trail ride,” Ben said. Then he looked at Autumn, “Which reminds me, we have that camp out trail ride this coming weekend” He explained further to the group, “The group of friends is entertaining guests from the Grand Caymans and organized a trail ride where we sleep over in tents.” Autumn smiled, “And guess what? They have even organized an Indian attack before supper!” Craig burst out laughing, “That’s something I’ve always wanted.. an Indian attack before supper! We are definitely going to the wedding, even if we are not invited.” Autumn giggled, “You are. I helped Auntie Alma write invitations, so I know.” Juliette was aghast, “But you said it is a Catholic wedding?” “Yes,” Landers nodded. “The service is Catholic because Bonnie and Beth’s brother, Father Bart is going to marry them and they are both Catholic. Sam and Joey are both Lutheran.” “Oh my,” Julie gulped, “I’ve never been inside a Catholic church.” “It is the same as mine,” Mandy blurted out and then realized what she said. Marion sneered, nearly spitting the words, “You are Episcopalian!” Landers winked at Mandy, “I’m certain that God isn’t concerned. After all, his Son was Jewish.” Craig and Sass broke out into fits of hilarity and before long, the whole group was laughing.

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Leaving the library, Landers felt like he had been run through a wringer. Mandy walked beside him and seemed to understand. She shook her head slightly to him and said very quietly, “At home, we talked in the kitchen over meatloaf, and didn’t take notes.” They both chuckled. Landers took the folder back up to his room and wondered what this family would have thought had they seen all the photos that he and Autumn had seen at the police station. One would have to be very callous to not be moved by the bodies of Camille and the girl in Oregon. While he was thinking about that, there was a knock at his door. He opened it, and there was Autumn, “May I come in?” “Of course,” he smiled and then closed the door behind her. “I want to apologize.” “For what?” “My family.” “Look, you never have to apologize for them. They all mean well.” “Marion had no right interrogating you that way. Who does she think she is?” Landers smiled, “I’m a novelty to some of them. May I ask you something? Does your family always have such formal family meetings?” “Ever since I can . It does make a person realize that it isn’t just chatter, but it can be very frightening if you think you’re in trouble.” Landers teased, “Not that you ever did.” “Nope!” Her eyes twinkled, “Not me, ever!”

“Now what does your family have planned? Do you know?” “No. I better get back down there and find out. Do you need some time alone? I mean, I can make an excuse for you.” “No. How are you?” “I’m so very thankful you are here. They listen to you. If it had been just me, It would have been a disaster.” “I can see that it might have been. Well, let’s go before they send a posse.” Autumn opened the door, “That would really singe their powdered wigs!” Landers chuckled, “You are a rebel ro.” “ down here in the South, a Rebel is a good thing!”

Juliette, Marion, and Grace were sitting on the verandah while the men had gone out to the back patio. The little kids were there and clamoring to do something. When they saw Autumn, they dashed to her, “Auntie, we want to do something exciting. Daddy says if we get restless, we have to go home,” Merrikay shared. “We want to play!” “Let’s see, what should we do?” Autumn asked the group of kids gathered around her. “Do you want to play croquet some more?” Jesse spoke up, “It is okay, but we want a really big adventure!” The other kids clapped, so Autumn said, “Let me think.” Ben made a suggestion, “How about we go on a treasure hunt for some pine cones? Then we can make Christmas ornaments for your grandmother.” “Hm, let me check with Riza to see if we have glitter and glue,” Autumn offered. Mandy came up beside them, “I’d love to help, if you tell me what to do. I have tons of stuff like that at our place. I can run over to pick it up if you need glue or ribbons.”

Marion’s husband, Craig ed them, “What are we doing?” Ben explained about the pine cone Christmas ornaments and Craig suggested they use cup hangers instead of string. “I can make a quick trip to the dime store and pick up what we need. Are the younger ones too small to do this?” “No. We had children this age, however, it depends on how fussy you want to be,” Landers answered and then slightly blanched when he realized the group he was talking with. Craig caught his embarrassment and grinned, “We can each make our own. That way, everyone will have their own ornament for our Christmas tree at my house. I’m not fussy and it will be cool to have a tree that is all homemade. When we put it up, we can string popcorn and cranberries. I’ve never done that and wondered how it would be. How does that sound?” “Like a good plan to me,” Sass chuckled. “I will go see if Madrid knows the whereabouts of our red wagon.” The rest of the afternoon was spent trudging through the wooded areas on the Simms property. Craig, Mandy, and Juliette went shopping for decorating things, while Ron and Marion directed the setting up an area on the back patio for them to do the work. Madrid rinsed the pine cones with a water hose while the kids set them out to dry. Then they all went to have a snack. Afterwards, they returned to the patio and everyone, including Grace, began to work on their pine cones. Ronald turned on some music and Madrid came to check on the activities. Ronald handed him a pine cone to work on for himself. When Riza came out with refreshments, she was also handed a paint brush. The group had a ball. There were only a few mishaps. A major catastrophe occurred when a spider crawled out of Phoebe’s cone. Sass disposed of it and became an instant hero. Craig and Oren became the hanger men while Mandy achieved fame as the hot glue gun expert. When they finally finished, they had over fifty ornaments, varying in size, color, and decoration. Ron proclaimed them all magnificent. Landers noticed that as the day went on, Autumn became more relaxed and animated. With the exception of Marion and Grace, things became very comfortable with the entire family. However, even they were nearly pleasant.

The family dispersed to get ready for a formal meal. Landers wasn’t used to eating so late, but had to it that he was hungry. The salad was almost a total disaster and the snack was only one dainty bun with chopped chicken filling. It was very tasty, but he could have eaten a plate full all by himself. When he returned downstairs after freshening up, there was only Oren and Ron. Landers had noticed the baby grand piano before and was dying to play it. While the men were waiting, he asked, “Would it be okay if I played the piano?” “Certainly. We have it, but no one knows how to play it. Whenever we have a gathering, we hire someone. Help yourself.” Landers began to play the fine musical instrument. He played some of the pieces he knew from memory. He had always been musical and helped with band and music classes. As he played, the children were drawn to it like a magnet. Before Riza called for dinner, the family gathered around the piano and even had a short sing along of Dixie. When they were seated for dinner, Ron asked Landers, “Ben, will you lead our blessing before we eat?” There was only a slight ruffle about him leading the prayer, but since Ronald had requested it, everyone acquiesced. Landers said the blessing and not only thanked the Lord for the bountiful meal, but for the nice afternoon with their family. Autumn was sitting next to him and gave his hand a squeeze. Dinner was underway, when Riza came into the room. “Father Landers, there is a phone call for you from a Mr. Crandall. Would you like me to take a message?” “Oh, no. I need to take that,” he looked to Ron, “May I be excused?” Ronald nodded and Landers left to take the call in the study “Hi,” Crandall said, “How is it going?” “Good now. We are at her parent’s. Sorry I forgot to call you right away. Things have been.. ah.. complicated. What is your schedule? When and where should we meet?”

“You sound anxious to get out of there.” “Am I that obvious? Actually, it was quite contentious early on.” “I’ll be in New Orleans Monday, but Vance will be through Atlanta tomorrow afternoon, about three. He can give you a lift to Orleans. I have a place I stay there and he’ll give you the directions. My treat. Sound doable? Or if you want to stay there longer, I can pick you up in Atlanta on Monday.” “The first plan would be great. We need to meet Vance at three tomorrow in Atlanta. Same place as before?” “Yes sir. I’m trying to keep it simple for you!” “I know you are zinging me, but actually, I am grateful. This is been more of a drain on me than I imagined. I have handled issues more involved than this before, but this has been a fright,” Landers confided. “Maybe it is because this is more personal for you.” Then Crandall hesitated before he tried to make light of it. “But we can talk later. Or you might just be getting old!” “You may be more right than you think.” “Well, I have to call Vance and tell him to not forget you. See you.” Landers returned to the table and Autumn asked, “Will Crandall pick us up?” “Vance will pick us up tomorrow at three in Atlanta and take us to New Orleans. Then Crandall will pick us up there on Monday. He got us a place there.” Autumn nodded, “Are we going to Montana before we go home?” “You know, we didn’t discuss that.” Ronald intervened, “We can get you a fine hotel in New Orleans.” “Not necessary,” Landers answered, “Crandall already made arrangements. It is a place where he always stays.” “I insist,” Ron countered.

“Dad, Crandall’s feelings would be hurt if we didn’t stay there.” Autumn explained, “He is a cool guy. You should get to know him. He is a charter pilot and has several planes. He does fishing trips, business meetings, and all sorts of things. He is a very knowledgeable, but rugged and filled with adventure.” “Sounds like it. If you leave his business card, I’ll be glad to consider using him for future trips.” Ronald nodded, “How did you come to know him?” “While in the Grand Caymans, one of our friends, Nora, received a serious neck injury. They wanted to get home, but had to travel with a medical contraption on her neck. The local FBI agent lined them up with this pilot.” Landers explained. “He flew them home so they didn’t have to deal with a commercial airlines. He has since become close friend.” “FBI?” Oren’s perked up, “Is he an ex-con or something?” “No, one of our other friends is retired FBI and he has friends in the agency all over. He knew the guys in the Caymans and so the man down there knew of Crandall as a capable pilot. He flies a lot of agents and prisoners for the FBI.” “Do you mean you’d allow our daughter to fly with a convict?” Grace gulped. “When they fly prisoners, it is with law enforcement,” Landers explained. “His team have a good reputation with the FBI, so they can’t be fly-by-nights.” “Did you just say fly-by-nights?” Sass started to chuckle, “And we’re to believe that you give sermons?” “Well, we call them homilies, Sass, and I do.” Landers laughed, “Once in a while, I even do a good job.” “Ah, I’ll take your word for it.” Sass was still snickering, “I just hope your explanations are better behind the pulpit than in person.” Landers teased, “I assume you are more careful with your chemical concoctions than you were with that glitter! I thought we were having a snowstorm there for a minute!” “That stuff should be outlawed!” Sass defended himself. “What a mess! One little sneeze and I had glitter all over!”

Little Loren giggled, “Uncle Sass got white sparkles all over my green ones! Now I have lots of shiny on my pine cone!” Sass tousled his hair, “I think it looks fantastic. What about you?” The little boy nodded, “It’s pretty nice.” As dessert was served, Grace spoke quietly with Ronald and he nodded. Then she said, “I’d like to extend an invitation to my family for brunch tomorrow. Since Landers and Autumn will have to leave before lunchtime to arrive in Atlanta in time, I wonder if we could meet for brunch here about ten-thirty?” “We’d have to go to early church, but certainly.” Oren said, “That’ll be nice. We want to tell Ben and Autumn goodbye. Also, the ornaments will have a few more hours to dry. I was dreading taking that sticky paint in the car.” “Good idea,” Craig said. “Since they are going to my house, I can bring a big box and store them at my house. I have just the place where they’ll be safe.” “From robbers?” Three-year old Jesse asked. “In our house safe?” “I don’t think they would fit,” Craig answered. “You can help me disguise the box so they will be secure.” Sass continued, “I heard that you and Autumn are going to Mass in Benton Ridge. Since Mandy always goes to Dannonville Christian with me instead of her Episcopalian church, we’d be glad to go with you. I think she would like a more formal service. Right, Mandy?” “Yes, I would. Is that okay?” “Fine with me,” Ben said. “Autumn?” Grace interjected, “Since you’ll have someone to go with, Autumn could go with us to our church.” “No, Mother.” Autumn said nicely, “It isn’t the church. I just don’t want to encounter all those people.” “Oh, yes. I overlooked that,” Grace winced.

“What time?” Autumn asked Mandy. “Madrid said they have services every hour and a half starting at six. I know I will never make it at six.” Sass looked at Ben, “What do you think? If brunch is at ten-thirty?” “How about seven-thirty? Nine would be too late,” Ben thought aloud. “Seven-thirty, it is. We’ll be here to pick you up a bit after seven.” Sass determined. “Think you can be beautiful by then, Girl?” Autumn frowned at her brother, “Better than you’ll look, I know!” The family parted that evening quite amicably. It had ended on a friendly tone and the kids were delighted they were coming back the next day. After everyone left, Ron asked Ben if he would like a cognac in the library before retiring. Ben shuddered, thinking it may be another conference, but Autumn said, “Go ahead. I want to help Riza with dishes.” The fireplace was lit, even though it was warm outside, Ron nodded toward two overstuffed chairs in front of the fireplace. He poured them each a cognac and sat in the empty chair, “It turned out to be a successful day, don’t you think?” “Yes,” Ben reflected, “I have to it, that I was concerned at first. Autumn was very hesitant about coming and I wondered if it may have been a mistake to insist that she did. However, I feel that once things were aired out, a lot of good came from it. This is the most comfortable I’ve ever seen her.” “I haven’t seen her this comfortable in years.” Ronald acknowledged, “Thank you for helping with things today. We have a long ways to go, but I feel that maybe this family can see our way out of this. How long do you think it will be before the Vander Vorst news hits here?” “I don’t know. Detective Owens said we should check in tomorrow, so he can keep us informed. Whenever we hear, we’ll it along to you. It could be as soon as a couple weeks or it may never be in the paper. If Vander Vorst settles, it may not. You know, just write out a check without a fight.” Landers debated about bringing up the subject, but then decided to ask, “Do you think that Grace will be able to handle it?” Ron shrugged, dejectedly, “I couldn’t begin to guess. I think if Marion,

particularly, is on board, she will. I will encourage her, but I don’t carry the weight that Marion does. I can never understand women. How can they be so backbiting?” “They’re no worse than men. Grace needs the confidence that she’ll have someone to rely on, no matter what folks in town say. Ron, it might be wise to remind her, that Vander Vorsts will be in pain, too. Even though they may have known about some of this, it doesn’t sound to me like they would condone it. Try to keep in mind how horrible you’d feel if you found that Oren did something like this. They stand to lose everything because of something they had little control over.” “Yes. I did think of that. Poor bastards. I can’t imagine how that would be.” “I know. I’ve seen some wonderful people torn between the love of their child and the horrors of the sins those same children committed. It is a uniquely human situation.” Ronald considered this man he had just met and then said, “I can tell you’ve dealt with all types of situations in your time. I don’t know how anyone can do it.” “Believe me, it isn’t always successful. Sometimes I look at the trouble we cause each other and wonder what we are trying to gain. So far, it eludes me.” “In our case, it was simple. We had nothing and wanted something. We wanted money and prestige. But in the process, we forgot the basic things that we had all along. Love, family, and self-respect. Do you think anyone gets it all?” “No one I’ve met. We strive for it and some get close, but I don’t think any of us ever achieve it. Mostly, I wonder if we’d recognize it, if we had it!” The two men settled into contemplating the human condition and watching the fire, when they were jolted by a loud crash, followed by a scream from the back patio. They dashed to the patio. The paints and glue had all been capped and set in the middle of the tables. The paint brushes were soaking in water, waiting to be cleaned, and the drying pine cones were still sitting on the table. Apparently a family of raccoon decided to get an early start on their Christmas decorations, as well, and five of them were

climbing all over the table! Riza had gone to grab a broom while Autumn attempted to shoo them away. Apparently the glue was especially tasty and three of the raccoons were not about to give up their bottles. By the time the men drove them away, there was paint, cones, glitter, and glue all over the concrete. Chairs had been tipped and one of the table coverings had been pulled down, dumping the contents of the table all over. Grace and Madrid came to in the clean-up effort and it looked for a minute that anger might take over. Paint and glue bottle caps had come off and the contents were dribbled all over. There was glitter all over the yard, but especially on the route the raccoons took when they made their escape. Landers noticed and pointed at trail of sparkles and chuckled, “I think even I could track them!” They started to laugh and became silly, even Grace. When she stood a chair upright, a handful of glitter landed on her pale blue silk robe. Since she had a previous run in with glue, she was covered in the stuff. Everyone froze, half expecting her to throw a tantrum. Instead, she picked up a piece of silver cord and put it on her head like a halo, “I’m a Christmas angel. Ron, look!” It took them about an hour to clean up the mess. Autumn said, “The kids will be upset that some of their ornaments were damaged.” “I don’t think so,” Grace giggled. “When we tell them about the baby raccoons, they might think it was fun. We can make another set. This time, I think we should do them in the garage. Don’t you, Ron?” “That’d be a better idea.” Before they went upstairs to bed, Grace actually gave her daughter a real hug and even gave Ben a slight one. Glittering all the way, she put her arm around her husband’s waist and they walked upstairs together. Autumn watched them and gave Landers a very pleased look, “I like that.” He smiled and nodded. They went up the stairs to their rooms. Autumn stopped at his door, “I need a pill tonight. Actually I feel okay, but Samuels said not to quit until things settle down.” “Come in and I’ll get it for you.”

He went in the ading bathroom and got her pill. When he came out, she was looking through his breviary. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I was snooping.” “It’s not secret. I just read some in it every day.” Landers smiled, “In fact, after my shower, I have to read some.” She took the pill from him and said, “Ben, I’m so thankful everyone made me come, but mostly thankful that you were here today.” “Autumn, I need to confess. I did something. I was given the choice to wait here another day and have Crandall pick us up in Atlanta. I hope you aren’t angry I made this decision without asking you.” Autumn listened and then thought a minute, “I’m kinda glad we’ll have an evening to ourselves in New Orleans. I have so many things we need to talk about. I think this is the best way.” “Thanks for understanding. Good night, Autumn.”

After his shower, Landers did his required reading, said his prayers, and meditation. Once in bed, he closed his eyes. He was glad that Autumn accepted his apology for not asking her about staying, but made a promise to himself not to do that again. He was pleased that things with her family were making progress, although definitely not there yet. He understood completely now why she kept things inside so much that they burst. She had been taught not to show emotion, negative or positive, all her life. Even though all her family did decide to say ‘no comment’ to the situation, they didn’t condemn her. He knew the fact her family was accepting of her situation was very calming to her. He could see that she was making her way back to herself and it was great to see.

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The next morning, they made it to Mass in good time. The service was nice and Mandy really liked it. Sass said it was okay, but whined he felt a bit like he had been in exercise class! Autumn giggled, “The Lutheran church is like that too, Sass. You just want to sit on your lazy bum.” “Ben, on your way back to the Dakotas, maybe you could give your little friend here a lecture about how she should treat her brother.” “I’ll see if I can fit that in,” Landers chuckled. “You have my deepest sympathies, Mandy. I think that Sass is like Joey and Sammy. It must be from his mother’s side of the family.” “I’m afraid to go to that wedding this fall. Not that it doesn’t sound like fun, but I don’t know if I’ll know what to do. Is it formal or not?” “It is a combination, Mandy.” Landers answered, “The service will be formal, but not tied to protocol. So, just wear clothes that you would for a wedding and dance here. But bring everyday clothes also, for the rest of the time.” Autumn interjected, “I’ll call you beforehand to let you know about the weather. We hope to have a trail ride anyway. Right, Ben?” “I’d think so,” Landers nodded. “You mean, sleep in a tent outside?” “No. We’re only doing this for a special event.” Landers chuckled. “I guess it’ll be Friday night, which I am grateful for because otherwise I’d have to miss out.” Autumn shot him a glance, “I hope not! I really want you to be there when I get scalped by the Indian raiders!” “I wouldn’t miss that for the world,” he gave her a silly look. “Sass, maybe we should have a talk. I might need some pointers.”

“I couldn’t begin to tell you how to survive Girl!” Sass moaned. When they arrived at Simms place, Autumn and Ben went to change clothes and bring their bags to the rental car. Riza called Ben to the phone and he took it in the den, but Autumn accompanied him. It was Detective Owens. “Sorry to intrude on your Sunday morning, but I wanted to let you know where things stand. The DA has reopened the case here, which caused a domino effect. Oregon and Atlanta are doing the same. The Atlanta PD will be interviewing the Vander Vorsts sometime this week. They’re interviewing Jake Harmon tomorrow. Our forensics team has gone over the evidence from Camille’s suicide. While there were many fingerprints on the suicide note, there was a predominance of Brad’s prints. They also discovered that his prints were on her pill bottles. It is interesting, because how did they get there? It places him at Camille’s that morning. Her case is now being reviewed. It was changed from suicide to COD: unknown. The Atlanta folks are re-examining Brad’s movements that day.” “Thank you, Detective Owens,” Ben said. “We are leaving here today and will be in New Orleans. We only spoke with Autumn’s family and they all said they would be willing to help you in any way they can.” “That’s good to know. Have a good trip and let’s make in New Orleans. Please thank Miss Simms for coming forward. Many in her situation would have let things be, but with her relentless quest for the truth, others will find some peace. Oh, and before I let you go, the Jerrimans left an envelope for Autumn here. I will forward it to her North Dakota address.” Ben hung up and relayed the information to Autumn. She shrugged, “I guess I’d rather have them think I had a relentless quest for the truth, than that I was trying to squirm out of my guilt!” Ben smiled at her, “Autumn, I’m very proud of you. You made the steps to deal with the situation. Don’t ever let anyone take that away from you.” When they went down to brunch, Ben ed the information along to Ron, who said he would tell the other adults when the children were playing. The children were all excited about the raccoons and had determined they were going to sit outside until dark to see which ones glittered. They even had asked

their Grandfather to lend them binoculars so they could see them. Before they left, Ron called Landers into the library. There, he handed him a check, “This is for you for our daughter’s expenses. I’d like to repay everyone for their kindness.” “None of us did it for repayment, Ron,” Landers answered. “I believe it’d be better if you gave it to Autumn. I know she wants very much to pay Joey back, since he is paying for her counseling and bought her a car. She wants to be independent.” “Hm. Grace never had any interest in independence. She preferred to have me do it all. I know the younger generation of ladies is different. I need to call Autumn in.” A few minutes later, Autumn ed them, looking very concerned. “What is important? I hope you are not giving Ben the business about this priest stuff.” “No,” her father shook his head, “Calm down. I wanted to give him a check to cover your expenses, but he refused. He thought you should know about it.” She raised her eyebrows to Landers, “He knows I’d be furious, Dad. Why do you want to give me money?” “I think you need a starter. This business with Brad has put you behind the eight ball and I want to give a hand. You can pay for your counselor visits, your car, and this trip! I know that it has cost many folks.” “I don’t want special favors because I was an idiot who believed a jackass.” “We all believed that jackass.” Ron shook his head, “I think you knew way down deep that he wasn’t what he was cracked up to be. I also think that’s why you weren’t ever very relaxed about your whole relationship with him. Your mother and I talked last night and realized that you have been more yourself here with Ben, than you ever were with Brad. We both realize, as with Sass, we never allowed you to speak your true feelings. Any time you tried to tell us your concerns, we cut you off. We bought into the façade so completely, we could only see it from that point of view.” “You and mother talked about me? My mother?”

“Yes, Autumn. Your mother realizes that she wasn’t willing to listen to your doubts. So, we want to do this.” “You don’t need to feel guilty!” Autumn scrunched her face, “You didn’t know what he was.” “We also realize that money won’t make up it. All we can do now is try to stop putting community before our family.” “What about the other kids? Why should I get money and they didn’t?” “Okay, take it as a loan. Six percent interest.” “I can’t pay back a loan. I haven’t even started my job yet.” “I’ve never had this much trouble giving money away!” Her dad put his hands in the air, “You’re being impossible! Let’s do it this way. I will give you this money now, an advance, and then it will be deducted from your inheritance unless you pay it back sometime. Will that be okay with you?” Autumn looked to Landers, “What do you think?” “Autumn, it has to be your decision. I’ll you, whatever you decide.” Ronald put his arms around his daughter, “I think this is a situation where most folks might have to take an advance. It isn’t much money, so whenever you can, you can pay it back- or not. I think it’d be wise to take it, since Joey will need his money for his wedding.” “Okay, but only if you promise to send me a copy of the legal papers saying this is what we did. I don’t want there to be any question about it. I certainly don’t want anyone to think that I only came her to get money.” “If that is all you wanted, you could’ve called.” Ronald chuckled, tearing up the check. “I’ll have the attorney mail you an official letter and check this week.” “Okay.” Autumn was still not very happy about it. Then she gave her father a hug, “I want you to know how much it has meant to me that you and Mother talked about me. It means a lot.”

“We love you and always have. We just forgot to let any of our children know. That’ll change.” Ron chuckled, “We’re going to make it a point to get to know Mandy better. Mother and Marion thought she was not very aristocratic and preferred that Sass find someone else. We decided that is not a sensible standard to judge anyone by. Actually, I rather like her.” “We do, too,” Autumn beamed broadly, “Don’t we, Ben?” “Yes, we do.” There was a round of farewells and promises to keep in touch, but Landers and Autumn were under way in time to make it to Atlanta to meet Vance. Neither wanted to have him wait, since he was making a stop just for them, but they were also glad to be alone and relax. They turned in the rental car and Autumn paid the bill. Landers frowned, “I told you I’d pay for it.” “You can buy me dinner instead. Okay?” “I guess, depending on where you want to eat? Ever been to New Orleans?” “No, have you?” “Once I was at the airport while a plane refueled.” “That doesn’t count,” Autumn giggled. “You’re such a goof. Don’t worry. I will find the most expensive restaurant I can.” “Thanks,” Landers laughed. “That’s cheers me up.” While they were talking, Vance walked up, “What’re you two arguing about?” “Money,” Autumn laughed, “Hi, Vance.” “Shouldn’t talk about money. It’s bad business.” Vance advised, “So, off to Orleans I hear. Crandall made reservations at his favorite place for you, the Barge Inn. He really picks them. I’ll give you the directions when we land. It is unique, but kinda cool.” “That sounds like our speed,” Landers smiled as they walked to their plane, “Autumn has plans that I will buy her a fine expensive meal tonight.”

“New Orleans has some of the best eating places in the world, and if you want to spend money, they will take it. A hundred dollars a plate, ala carte!” Autumn’s eyes sprang open, “Oh no! Something way more reasonable.” Vance grinned, “I’ll give you the list with the directions to the Barge Inn.” Later when they landed in New Orleans, Vance walked with them to the terminal with a stack of brochures and maps. “These are the things I have for New Orleans. I wish I didn’t have to go to Mexico City, I’d love to show you around.” Vance grinned at Autumn and then handed her some maps. “This walking map of the French Quarter is very good. You’ll want to take a cab there. Trust me, you don’t want to rent a car. Parking is a nightmare and you will enjoy walking more. Any place in particular you are interested in?” “I’d love to see St. Louis Cathedral,” Ben said. “I’ve heard it is magnificent.” “It is. I have the brochure in the stack. It overlooks Jackson Square.” Then the man gave a word of caution, “I imagine you’ll want to walk around the Square at night to get the real flavor of the place, but mind you…keep your girl’s hand. It’s a place filled with folks of all sorts and there’s plenty of trouble a person can get into. It’s easy to get lost. If you are up for breakfast, the Café Du Monde Beignets is a must. Then you really know you are in New Orleans.” “Okay,” Autumn smiled, “What are they famous for?” “Beignets. They’re like a fritter with fruit inside. I love them.” Vance chuckled, “And for dinner, I’d suggest if you really want to have a dinner to , try to get a reservation at Antoines. It is the oldest in New Orleans and opened in 1840. Call right away. It is expensive, but it is the best French Restaurant I’ve ever eaten at, outside of Paris. With luck, since it is mid-week, you will get in, but they take reservations months ahead. And the same with Breakfast at Brennans on Royal Street. It is fantastic.” “When’s Crandall coming? We won’t have time!” Autumn giggled. “He won’t be in until tomorrow evening about four. He had to do some repairs. He said to tell you that he has the rooms for tomorrow night, too. He was real sorry, but he didn’t want to fly until he was certain the plane was air worthy. He apologizes for the delay. He didn’t know when he would call because he is busy

brow-beating the mechanic. He’ll meet you at the Barge Inn.” Vance chuckled, “I would love to see the looks on your faces when you see that place! It is different Don’t worry, it is safe.” “Sounds scary,” Autumn grimaced. “Not as scary as it looks. Here is the address. So, tomorrow at five.” “We owe you a dinner for all the help you gave us,” Landers smiled. “I may just collect one day. Enjoy.” The couple thanked Vance and then waved down a cab. “He’s sure a nice guy,” Autumn said as they got into the cab. “I bet seeing the French Quarter with him would be a riot.” “It would. Maybe you should find out his stats,” Landers suggested. “Ben, I meant for him to show both of us the French Quarter. I wouldn’t be happy with anyone who traveled as much as he does. Can you imagine?” “Never thought of that.” “Same with Curtis, Josh’s brother. He’s a nice guy, but he is gone at least as much as he is at home. That’d be like Brad on steroids.” “Autumn, not every man is like Brad and many men who travel for business are loyal and have good home lives.” “I know that, but I’d never trust them. I can barely believe anything anyone says, even if they’re right in front of me.” Autumn studied Ben before she said, “I know you think that I’m all over this mess, but I’m still in the tape and glue stage.” “I do know.” Landers patted her hand, “You’ll have to work at it.” “I don’t want to work right now. I want to relax and be with someone that I do trust.” She smirked, “Even if you are a bozo, I trust you. I know you are more of a jerk than most folks think you are, but that’s part of what I like about you. You

are real.” His face was a mixture of expressions, “I don’t know if I’m happy or sad about whatever it was you just said.”

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When the cab pulled up in front of the Barge Inn, Landers said a small prayer of thanks that it was still daylight. It looked for all the world like a spooky gothic fortress, surrounded by vines and gnarled trees, draped in Spanish Moss. The cabbie gave them a quizzical expression, “You really want to stay here? I can find you a different place.” “Our stay is a gift from a friend,” Landers answered as he tipped the man. “Respectfully, I would find a new friend!” the man nodded, seriously. They approached the moss-covered stone fence. The fence displayed gargoyles of various designs on top and was covered in brambles and vines. When Landers opened the creaky iron gate, Autumn started to giggle. “I’m sure glad Vance said it was okay. Otherwise, I don’t think I would go in.” Landers nodded, noticing the uneven stones in the overgrown path, “Watch your step. If I didn’t know Crandall, I still wouldn’t stay. It has to be for affect, huh? Do you think we need body guards?” When they approached the heavy front doors, they pushed it open. Before they went in, Landers said, “Want to run? “I can’t believe I told Dad that we didn’t want his offer of a nice hotel.” “Next time— say yes,” Landers raised his eyebrows. Autumn nodded, “I’d tell you to go in first, but I don’t want to be out here alone. Did you notice, the only plants in the yard are those Venus fly traps? These trees are either dead or haunted. I’ve never seen trees this barren and grotesque. This would be a great place to send Sass on Halloween, huh?” “Keep that in mind, if we survive. Well, it’s been nice knowing you.” Landers took a deep breath.

They entered the lobby, which carried on the theme, down to stone floors covered in blood red and black area rugs and candles on black candlesticks, albeit electric. They walked over to the ancient, heavily carved desk and a pale woman with raven hair dressed in a black flowing dress smiled, “Hello. You must be Landers and Simms.” Both visitors sighed with relief at her friendly tone, “Yes, we are.” “Crandall reserved this for you. He is one of our most loyal patrons. As you can imagine, we have a very limited clientele.” “Crandall speaks very highly of this place.” Landers asked as he filled out the registration form. “May I ask how you came about this theme for your inn?” “Well, my uncle bought the place eons ago. His idea was to make it look like a river barge. He soon discovered the remodeling would’ve been extremely expensive because of the high water table. Since the rock wall was sound, he finally gave up and just went with the medieval theme. It more or less evolved into the Frankenstein thing. When I inherited it, my husband and I just kept it.” Then she handed them their room keys on heavy chains, “It keeps the crowds down.” “I can see that,” Landers agreed, “Do you ever wish to change it?” “We used to, but ended up with the same issues that my uncle had. Since it rains a lot here and the water table is so high in our area, we’re very limited. For hundreds of years, gargoyles have been used in architecture as a spout to move water away from a roof and the walls of buildings. It prevents the erosion of mortar in masonry. I don’t know why they all look like frightening animals, but there is actually a basin in the back of each statue that allows the water to run out the open mouth. The longer the trough, or monster’s neck, the further from the building the water is directed. Neat, huh? I guess that got a bad rap because they look like monsters. So, when you have lemons, make lemonade. Which reminds me, we have coffee, tea, and lemonade available in the dining room along with some pastries afternoons. Help yourself. Arnold will be here in a minute to take you to your rooms. We can arrange rides to the Square or airport, but you have to return on your own. Dial 9 to get an outside line and 0 for the desk. Anything I can help you with?” “Do you know what time the daily Mass is at St. Louis Cathedral?”

“There is one at six-thirty and one at eight every morning. If you want a ride, we can arrange that. Just say the word. We need a forty-five minute notice.” “Thank you.” Autumn smiled, “Have there been sightings of ghosts?” “No,” the lady smiled, “Only a few vampires and mummies around lately.” Arnold carried their bags to the elevator, which was discretely hidden in a what looked like the entrance to a wine cellar. “That stone stairway will last forever, no doubt, but it isn’t fun to carry bags up and down.” Arnold observed. “When I got this job and looked at the stairway, I almost quit!” Arnold took them down the wide hall, graced on both sides with coats of arms, black carved mirrors, artificial cobwebs, and gargoyle statues. The doors to their rooms looked like the heavily beamed doors at the entrance, but were of much lighter weight. Arnold pointed out that each room opened onto a balcony that overlooked the enclosed garden below. There was a long-necked gargoyle fountain and black wrought iron furniture sitting on a rock patio, with the landscape of more frightening vegetation. They all went into Autumn’s room and Arnold opened the heavy deep red drapes that revealed a sheer over the wrought iron barred doors to the continuous balcony that all the rooms opened onto. Autumn grimaced and muttered, “Nice.” Arnold nodded, “We have a fresh bouquet of flowers on the end table.” Autumn groaned, “Black roses! My favorite.” Landers cracked up, “There are a couple blood red ones in there, too.” “Wait until I see Crandall!” Autumn threatened. “I’m going to put my things away, then what do you want to do?” Landers asked as he and Arnold headed toward the door. “Buy a guard dog!” “I’ll call Brennan’s and Antoine’s to see if we can get reservations,” Landers said and then asked, “Will you be okay?”

Autumn shrugged. “One thing I’m certain of, I’ll not run off!” A little later, Autumn answered the antique-style European phone, “Hello?” “Hi, it’s me.” “I’m glad, because I don’t know anyone else here.” “Another flattering compliment from you,” Landers chuckled. “I have some news. We have a reservation at nine for tomorrow morning for breakfast at Brennan’s. We can get in at Antoine’s tonight, but we’d have to hurry. They had a cancellation for five-thirty. I took it, but if you don’t want, we can cancel. We can do something else. I hate to make all these arbitrary decisions.” “Not a problem,” Autumn said. “I appreciate that more than you know. Both sound good to me. What exactly does one wear?” “That dress you wore to church this morning is very nice. But you might want to leave your handbag at home. It’s big as a suitcase.” “That’s why I brought it! But you are right. What am I going to do with this room key? If you put a key in each pocket, you’ll look like a clown.” “I was thinking of checking with the desk and leaving our keys there.” “Good idea. Are we going out after dinner or coming back? I feel like I’ve been sitting all day, but I don’t want to sight-seeing in high heels.” “We can decide when we get back. Okay? If we want to go sight-seeing, we can change first.” They arrived at the world renowned restaurant, Antoine’s about five minutes before their reservation. It was an elegant restaurant which looked very stylish inside. They were seated at a table with white linen tablecloths and handed their menus. The waiter filled their glasses with iced water and asked if they cared for some wine. Landers said they needed a minute and then noticed Autumn’s frown as she looked at the menu. “What’s the problem?”

“There are no prices on my menu.” “That’s because it’s the lady’s menu. Mine has prices.” Then he smiled, “You will be a lot happier if you don’t look at them.” “I don’t want you to overspend.” “Just once, don’t cause trouble.” “Are we going to have wine?” Autumn asked. “Will it bother my medication?” “You could have one glass, but don’t guzzle.” “I don’t know about you.” She crossed her eyes at him, “Do you read French?” “No. I can read Latin and Greek.” “Big help- if we were in Greece or Lati– forget it.” “You mean Rome?” Landers grinned, “Doesn’t yours explain the dish below in English? Mine does.” “Yes, it does, but I was trying to give you the business.” He shook his head, “Just order.” They each had one glass of house white wine, while waiting for their meals. Autumn decided on Poulet sauce Rochambeau; grilled chicken breast grilled served with Rochambeau sauce over a slice of ham, while Landers had the Filet de truite meuniere; filet of the catch of the day in a lemon-butter sauce. The dessert they chose was Peche Melba; ice cream, peach slices, raspberry sauce and toasted almonds for dessert. They finished off their meal with Café brulot diabolique, Antoine’s own creation of spiced coffee and brandy flambé. They had a wonderful meal and visited amicably. They felt as though they were royalty because the wait staff was wonderful and the ambiance was fantastic. They decided they were truly spoiled. It was about seven-thirty when they arrived back at the hotel. There they quickly changed into casual attire. Autumn grabbed her huge handbag and threw in the

room keys. They were delighted when the cab dropped them off on Bourbon Street near the French Quarter. The French Quarter was a very interesting. Autumn took Vance’s advice and kept a good grip on Lander’s hand. There were many blind alleys and strange looking folks around. There were folks from all over the world and of every walk of life. There were barkers at some of the entrances to night clubs with a carnival mood, jazz music emanating from every other building, and an atmosphere unique to New Orleans. The ments were truly correct when they said it was like no other place on earth. The couple wandered down the streets, in and out some of the places. Walking on Bourbon Street, Autumn looked up and almost ed out. The second floor window above had an open window, through which a very scantily clad woman appeared. She was on a swing and it swung out over the sidewalk and back inside again. Autumn’s mouth dropped open and she poked Lander’s arm. “Look! I mean, don’t look! You’re a priest, you can’t look! But you should look!” He looked up as she came swinging through the window and then started to laugh. “Autumn, calm down. I’ve seen women before!” “Really?” “Yes, really. I worked for a carnival and circus, ?” “Oh, no I didn’t .” Autumn’s eyes were huge as she asked, “I mean, Ben, answer me honestly. You didn’t have sex with the alligator lady, did you?” He started to laugh. “No, I can honestly say I never had sex with an alligator lady! Good grief Autumn, what goes through your head?” “Well,” she shrugged as if it made perfect sense, “How am I to know?” He laughed some more and gave her a hug, “You are a crazy person!” “Me? I’m not the one that had sex with an alligator.” “Shh! What’s gotten into you?”

“Nothing,” she smiled. “I just got hit with the silly bug. Sorry. I have to say that this last week of either trauma or restraint has about made me bananas. I want so much to relax and just be me. I’m so glad that we have this time together where I don’t have to think about how I’m acting every breath.” Landers chuckled, “A little restraint about the alligator would be nice.” “Do you think we can find a quiet place to have a soda and just relax,” Autumn asked more seriously. “Good idea,” Landers looked around, “I would enjoy listening to some jazz or blues. How about you?” “Sounds okay to me.” They wandered for a while before Autumn noticed Landers seemed nervous. She squeezed his hand, “What is it, Ben? You seem nervous or something.” “I am,” he stopped walking and turned to her. “For some reason, I’m very antsy. Almost a foreboding, but also an excitement.” “Want to go back to the Barge Inn?” He shook his head, “No. Maybe it has been too much this last week for me as well. Just think of all the different places we’ve been and things we’ve done. I can’t begin to fathom how you can be in any kind of control.” “I’m not, really,” she shrugged. “I would’ve been institutionalized if you hadn’t been here for me through all this.” He smiled, “Ah, you are a lot stronger than you think.” “No,” she raised her eyebrows, “I’m really not.” “Anyway, let’s go at least enjoy some smooth jazz or blues for a while. It would be a shame to miss it.” She scrutinized him, “For a while, but not if you don’t feel up to it.” “I promise I will tell you if I need to go back.”

A block later, they found a place whose open doors shared it’s jazz music with the pedestrians on the street. They went in and found a small table near the side wall. It was a cozy little place, serving drinks and coffees. The headliners were a small jazz band known as the Wagon Willie’s Band. There was a pianist, double bass player, drummer, banjo player who doubled on the guitar, and a horn section consisting of a clarinet and a saxophone. The band was a mixture of white and black musicians. The couple took a seat at the table with a candle in a glass bowl as the table decoration. When the young waiter came over, he placed napkins on the table before he looked at them and asked, “What would you like?” When Landers answered, the waiter looked at him. Then his mouth dropped open and his head sprung back, “Landers?” “Yes,” Ben answered, “Do I know you?” “But you’re up there… I mean, who are you?” The man straightened, “How can you be you?” “I’m sorry, I don’t understand,” Ben responded. Autumn was now befuddled. The waiter pointed to the stage, “Look!” He looked toward the stage where the small combo was playing. The bass player was doing a solo bit. Now, Ben’s mouth dropped open and he almost fainted. He just stared at the man who could be his mirror image, playing the bass. He grabbed Autumn’s hand and simply stared, trying to get his breath. Autumn asked the waiter, “Who is that?” The waiter answered as if he had seen a ghost, “Dick Landers.” Autumn motioned to Ben, “Ben Landers.” “My god!” The waiter yelped. “It’s like a bad acid trip.” Autumn looked at the man who had been her champion throughout her debacle, now sitting pale and motionless. She looked to the waiter, “Could you bring us some ice water and maybe a coffee, so we can figure this out.”

The young man nodded, almost grateful to move away from them. After he left, Autumn took Ben’s hand in both of hers and said in an authoritarian tone, “Look at me. Ben, look at me.” His eyes turned to her and he barely mumbled, “Huh?” “Ben, we’ll figure this out. Maybe the good Lord decided to reveal some of your history tonight. Take a deep breath and try to relax. Okay? It’s us! There is nothing that we can’t handle.” “Who is that?” he asked her dryly. “Is this real? We should leave.” “No. The waiter said his name is Dick Landers. We need to find out more. Keep calm. This may be a blessing you don’t understand yet. He may be the key to your family. You should be delighted.” “I don’t know, Autumn. It has always been only me. I just don’t know,” stammering to himself as much as her. “Relax and think about breathing. Please. I don’t want to have to call an ambulance. After all, you are you and whoever that is, isn’t you.” Autumn suggested seriously. “If you really want, we can just leave.” “Yes, we should. Let’s just go.” “Before we do, answer me one thing. Will you wonder the rest of your life who the man was?” He frowned and then looked back at the stage, “I suppose, but it has always been only me.” “You always tell me about trusting the Lord. Don’t you?” He stammered, “That’s different.” “Only because we were talking about me, not you.” “Sometimes you bug the hell out of me,” Landers growled. “If you insist, you can get a cab and go back. I’m staying. I want to find out who

that is.” Autumn said with determination, “At the very least, he has to be a cousin or something.” “It has always been only me,” Landers murmured as he looked back at the stage. “I am alone. Just me.” The waiter returned with the iced water and the coffee. “Would you like something else?” “Ben would like a B&B. Right?” Autumn answered. Ben nodded slightly and then she said, “Could I ask you to let that Landers person if we can meet when he has a minute?” “I already left a message with his manager. He is like this guy’s clone or something. Barrett will send Dick over on their break.” “Thank you.” When the waiter walked away, Autumn turned her attention back to Ben. “There, see. It isn’t so bad. He’ll come over as soon as he has a break. Then we will know.” “Autumn, can I tell you something?” “Sure.” “I’m terrified.” “I imagine so.” Then she patted his hand, “I want to tell you something. Even though he is the spit and image of you, you’re better looking.” He had to chuckle then, “I bet you say that to all the guys that look like me.” “So, what do you want to ask him?” “I don’t know. What do you think? I was always just me. No one else.” “I have never not known who my family was or where I came from. So, I really don’t know how you must feel. But Ben, you have never been all alone. You know that, don’t you?” “I know, but it has always been just me. I could be anybody I wanted to be.”

“You goofy person. You are you and nothing can make you change that. Hear me?” Autumn reiterated, “But God may have new plans you haven’t heard yet.” “I don’t know how I even feel.” The waiter returned with the drink, “Anything for you, Mrs. Landers?” Autumn answered, “No thank you. This will be fine. How long have you worked here?” “About a year. Wagon Willie has played here most of the time. Dick Landers is a good guy. I hope you aren’t here to cause him any trouble.” “No. We didn’t even know he was here.” Autumn answered. “How long until the break?” “About twenty minutes.”

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The couple was certain that the waiter had misspoken as it seemed at least two hours before the break. Landers was very nervous and anxious and Autumn tried her best to calm him. “What if he doesn’t like me?” “You are kind person. If he doesn’t like you, he has rocks in his head.” Autumn said kindly, “Most folks have family that don’t like them and some that they really like. What if you don’t like him?” Ben’s tone changed, “I bet you think I’m a coward.” “No, I don’t.” Autumn became very serious, “Ben, this is a mystery that you have lived with all your life. Finding out anything about the truth will be difficult. But you are strong, faithful, and have helped many others through difficult things. I know you can do this. No matter what. I may not be much, but I’m here for you.” Landers looked at her and teared up, “You are much.” “You’re the same to me.” Just then, the musicians announced their break. The waiter, without being asked, appeared with another B&B and some fresh coffee. “Barrett is going to tell him and this is on the house.” A couple minutes later, the man that looked like a bit more worn version of Ben Landers walked up to the table. On the way, he spoke to the waiter and then came to their table. He smiled warmly and held out his hand to shake Ben’s before he sat down. “I prayed this day would come.” “You did?” Ben asked, numbly. “Yes. Hello,” the man said as he looked to Autumn, “I’m Dick Landers. I take it you are his wife?”

“No. She is my dearest friend, Autumn Simms. I’m not married.” The man responded warmly, “You are Benjamin Dorian Landers, born September 19, 1930, born eleven minutes before me. I am your identical twin brother, Richard Damian Landers, born September 19, 1930.” “Identical twins!” Ben gasped. “And you knew about me?” “Yes, since I was a little kid. I can tell you the whole story, but first how did you find me?” “We didn’t. It was always just me, alone. I never knew anything about my family.” Ben stammered. “We were just walking by, heard the music, and about gave the waiter a heart attack.” “James? The waiter is James! Poor James? I imagine you have a billion questions. I can tell you some of what I know. I have a box at my place that our father kept for you, in case we ever met up. I can get it to you tomorrow,” Dick smiled as the waiter brought him a bourbon on the rocks. “I guess I should tell you what I can.” “Please,” Autumn said. “Ben never knew anything.” “This is what I know. Our parents married in 1928.” Ben interrupted, “What were their names?” “Oh, I’m sorry. Benedict and Doreen Landers. They were living in Fort Lauderdale. Our father was a musician and played drums with a big dance band like those of the day.” Dick explained, “Mind if I smoke?” Both Ben and Autumn shrugged and he nodded. “Thanks. You know, no matter how many times I planned out in my head what I would say if I ever met you, now I can’t think of a thing. You sure look like me. It is totally weird.” Ben replied, “It is almost other worldly.” “You got that right. Well, where was I? Oh, the parents. Our mother was the singer in the band. Anyway, she was sickly, but Dad said that she loved us with all her heart. She died shortly after we were born. I never heard the cause. She is

buried in Fort Lauderdale. Neither of our parents had family. Dad had a brother who was killed in WWI. His folks had ed on and our mother was raised by her grandmother, who was very elderly. So, Dad did what he could to care for us, but after a couple months, he just couldn’t handle it. The thirties were tough times. The band went on the road then and the only person he could get to watch us backstage couldn’t mind two babies. So, he was in a dilemma. “He told me that he worried and tore himself apart, but just couldn’t find an answer. But the Depression had hit hard, so there were no other jobs available or he’d have done that. He finally made a Solomon’s choice. He had promised our mother he would care for us. He didn’t want to break his word to her. Since she was Catholic, he said that he fixed up a laundry basket. He decided that whichever one of us woke up first, he would take to the nearby Catholic church. It was you. So, he said he put a note in the basket, wrapped you in the shawl Mom had crocheted and then set you inside the entry on the steps to the sanctuary.” Numbly, Ben nodded, “That’s where I was found. I still have the shawl. Did he plan to come back to get me?” “I was about three months old, so I have no idea what his plan was. I do know that later Dad went back to the church to see if he could find you. There had been a fire and most of the church records were destroyed. They had a new priest and he directed Dad to an older nun. She ed that year there were at least five babies left there. Like I said, it was very hard times. The infants were all transferred out to various orphanages that had the room. So we never found out any more.” “I was sent to St. Elizabeth’s Foundling Home in Tennessee.” Ben sighed, “Would it be possible for me to meet my father?” Dick wagged his head, “I’m very sorry. Dad ed our mother, many years ago. He never did well after mom died and he gave you up. When he couldn’t find you, he started drinking and in the end, was a heroin addict. He left me with Wagon Willie’s folks so I had a permanent home and could go to school. I think he hoped that he could find you and we could be together. Dad died several months later. Willie’s father, Strawberry Meddow said he died of a broken heart. Authorities said he overdosed. He loved us and he did love you. He only did what he did to try to do the best for us.”

“Sad.” Ben shook his head, “So, this Wagon Willie is like your step-brother?” “You could say so. Willie’s folks had a pile of kids and just threw me in the lot. Wagon and I were the closest in age and have been tight ever since. His dad had met our dad in the band, but he moved back to Mississippi to be with his family. So, our dad followed. Dad was in a band with Strawberry until he got too sick with the booze and drugs. He is buried in Louisiana. Strawberry took me to his funeral. There were only band there. Very small group, but those that were there were his true friends.” “That’s good. It is good that people have friends,” Ben said as he squeezed Autumn’s hand. “So, what about your life?” “Well, I graduated high school with Willie and we ed the Army. When we came home, we started this band. You know, I grew up backstage and so I know little else. A few years back, I got married. Jill was a sweet person and we had a good life. We have two children, but Jill was taken from us. Damnedest thing. She went to the mailbox and a gust of wind tossed a broken electrical line above and it fell on the metal mailbox, just as she opened it. The coroner said she died of electrocution almost instantly. I never want to go through anything like that again. I stood at the door of the house and watched, unable to do a thing. If Willie hadn’t been there, I would’ve completely lost my mind.” “I’m so sorry, Dick. Willie sounds like a great friend.” “He really is. He took care of me and the kids.” “How old are the children?” Autumn asked. “Benji is just five and Aimee is two and a half. Jill has been gone now over a year. It’s hard and I know it’s hard on the kids. Jill’s father is all she had. He is military and lives overseas. Funny history repeating itself. Dad was left with us twins and I was left, too. I appreciate his situation more now than when I was a child. Mostly it is me and Willie’s family. There is a neighbor gal who babysits.” Dick continued, “But what about you? I’ve been talking like a steam engine.” “I was raised at St. Elizabeth’s but ran away to the circus and carnival when I was sixteen. A year later, I landed in jail for petty theft. There I became reacquainted with the Catholic church. A dear priest took me under his wing and after jail, set me on the straight and narrow. I went to seminary, became a priest

and then did a stint as a military chaplain. After that, I spent many years in San Diego working at a Rehab center there for drugs, alcohol, and shell-shocked veterans. A couple years ago, I was looking for a change and moved to a church in central North Dakota. It is now a permanent position at a large rural parish there. Recently, Autumn came to our community from this part of the country and we became friends. That is why we are here.” “I didn’t think priests could marry.” “We can’t, but we can have friends.” Then the drummer began warming up and that was the call for Dick to return to the stage. He stood, “I’m sorry, I have to get back. Will you be around for the next break?” Autumn answered with determination, “We will be.” “I don’t want to lose you so soon after we found each other.” Dick grinned like a silly kid, “You’re my big brother!” Ben watched his brother walk up the steps to the stage. “I feel like—I don’t know what!” He turned and mumbled, “Did you hear what he said? I hope so, because I doubt I could repeat it.” “I think so. See, there was nothing to worry about. And Ben, he must want to get to know you. He asked you to hang around.” “Do you realize that I have a brother? A twin brother? An identical twin? And a nephew and niece? I mean, me? I always thought it was just me. Do you think I will be a good brother? And an uncle? Me, an uncle? A brother?” “Of course, you will. Anyone would be proud to have you for a brother or an uncle,” Autumn smiled. “I need to think about this. Just think, he was living a life, while I was living a different one. Isn’t that amazing? I know that happens, but not to me. I always thought I was alone.” He shook his head, “I never imagined that I’d ever find my family. I just don’t know how to take it all in.” “It’s a lot, but you know, Dick has to take it all in, too. Although, he did have a

heads up. Did you notice, your father’s name was Benedict and they named their boys Ben and Dick?” Ben nodded, “I did notice. I bet Dorian came from my mother’s name, Doreen. What do you think?” “I think so. And they did love you. I told you that.” “I know you did.” Ben took a drink of coffee, “Thank you for not letting me leave. I was really close to going.” “I know. I recognize the flight look! You’d never let me bolt!” He gave her a quick hug, “I don’t care what anyone thinks or says, I love you, Autumn Simms.” She giggled, “I think that God must have decided that you waited long enough to find out about your roots.” The couple stayed until about midnight visiting with Dick on the breaks, but then went back to the Barge Inn. They had made plans to meet with Dick and his children at his place the next day about noon. He wanted to get some sleep and then find that box he had stored for his brother.

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Before, Autumn had been holding Ben’s hand. Now, he was holding hers. He seemed to need the security and she wanted to him. They rode back to the Barge Inn without a word and then went inside. In the lobby, there was a sheet for early wake up calls or scheduling rides. Autumn stopped and asked Landers, “Which service do you want to attend tomorrow? First or second?” Landers didn’t answer, but just shrugged absently. She signed up for a ride to the six-thirty Mass, since she knew they had a reservation at Brennan’s for breakfast at nine and wake-up calls for both of them at five. They took the elevator upstairs and walked to their rooms. At her door, they stopped and Landers spoke, “Ah, I need to get your pills.” “That’s okay.” “No,” Landers frowned. “I came to help you, not be a burden.” “Okay,” Autumn shrugged, knowing that he didn’t need an argument. They walked to his room and she waited while he got her pill. When he handed it to her, she took his hand, “Are you going to be okay?” He nodded, “It’s a lot to think about.” “Promise that you will call me if you want to talk.” “I’m fine.” “I won’t leave unless you promise.” “I promise.” Landers shook his head, “I’ll be okay.” “I don’t know if I should believe you.”

He flashed a look to her, “Autumn, I have never lied to you.” She gave him a slight hug, “I know. I just worry.” “No need. Let’s just get some rest.” She went to her room and looked at the pill. Then she set it on the bathroom cabinet and decided that she didn’t want to sleep too soundly that night. She took a bath and put her pajamas on, but instead of curling up in her cocoon, she opened the balcony door to let some of the cooler evening air through the screen. She saw the light beam from Ben’s room across the balcony go out. She felt a bit of relief, but she was still very concerned. She couldn’t judge his reaction that evening. She crawled into bed, but only leaned back on the pillows. She didn’t know how a person should react when they find out about their missing family. Even as a friend, she had difficulty processing it. It was something she could barely comprehend. Had it not been so late, she would have called Father Vicaro or Auntie Alma. Or even Dr. Samuels. She had no idea what to do. Dick seemed like a nice person, but what could a person know in bits of conversations between a few sets of jazz. She certainly was no judge of character. She knew he wasn’t a fake. He looked so much like Ben, it was uncanny. But after all, they were identical twins. They both smiled easily and had some of the same facial expressions, but they were quite different. Dick was world-worn and seemed tired. He was outgoing, like Ben, but more guarded. He spoke with a very definite Creole accent. Whenever he spoke of his late wife or their children, his expression softened with kindness. Autumn liked that. He explained that he named his son, Benjamin in honor of his lost twin. They called him Benji. The little girl was named Aimee Jillian. He said that his wife was very petite and with bright blue eyes and light brown curly hair. He thought the kids looked like her, but he wanted it to be that way. He obviously missed his wife and was not over mourning yet. Autumn noticed the light in Ben’s room come back on and she got out of bed. She could see the a shadow move back and forth in front of his window and she knew he was pacing. She looked at the clock and finally decided she didn’t care about the time.

She got an outside line and called St. John’s Rectory. After a few rings, Father Bart answered. Autumn started to cry, “Slick? This is Autumn. Can I speak to Vicaro?” “Of course, is everything okay?” Bart asked with concern. “I don’t know. I just need advice.” “I’ll get him.” Bart answered, “Hold on.” While she was waiting, she saw Ben’s lights go out again. Then Father Vicaro answered, “Autumn, what can I do for you?” Autumn blurted out a brief description of the revelations of the evening and her concerns of Lander’s reaction. There was dead silence on the other end and she hesitated, “I shouldn’t have bothered you so late. I’m sorry.” “No, I’m glad you called.” Vicaro answered, “It’s a lot to take in. I can’t imagine what Landers is going through. Did he talk very much about it?” “No. He was almost numb. He just kept saying ‘I thought I was alone.’ I can see the light from his room on the balcony, and it has been off and on several times. I think he is pacing. Should I go to him? Call him? Leave him alone? What? I signed up for a ride to first Mass at the cathedral tomorrow morning, but he never said anything. I’m at a loss.” She started to cry, “Ben is such a kind, thoughtful person to everyone else. I hate to have him hurt like this and I don’t even know how to help him.” “I know. I don’t know if he is hurt or simply overwhelmed. You did the right thing about Mass. Make sure he goes. If he doesn’t, call and see if a priest can come to him.” Vicaro talked to Bart a minute, and then said, “If it doesn’t seem like he is getting to sleep, could we ask you to go to him? He may need to talk, or at least to have someone there. It is a blessing that he found his family, but as with many blessings, they often come with many emotions that need to be dealt with. I’m grateful that you are there for him. If you need anything, don’t be afraid to call back. We’ll keep you in our prayers.” “I don’t know what to say to him.” “Often, nothing is the best. Being there is the most important thing.” Vicaro

stated, “Let one of us know how things are going. Landers has a strong faith and is a good soul. His world has been jolted. He needs an anchor right now. You said you are going to meet with his brother again tomorrow? When will Crandall be there?” “At four or five this afternoon. I wish he was here. He will be able to help him, right?” “It’ll be someone else he knows but Autumn, Ben is fortunate to have you.” “His light just came on again. I better go. Thanks, you guys. Sorry I bothered you.” “No bother,” Vicaro answered softly. “Bless you both.” Autumn heard Ben’s patio door open and saw him come out on the balcony and lean on the wrought iron railing, staring off to the horizon. She slipped on Joey’s big sweater over her cotton pajamas and stepped into her flip-flops. She went out her door and walked up beside him. He never even noticed her approach. She put her hand on his arm and he turned toward her. He had been crying quietly and had tears rolling down both his cheeks. When he noticed her, his put arms around her and wept into her shoulder. She simply patted his back and held him while he cried for a couple minutes. Then he pulled himself together, “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m being stupid.” She gave him a slight hug, “Want to sit down? I can get us some water.” “That sounds good. I need to get a grip.” He mumbled, “The swing is damp with humidity. I’ll get a towel to dry it off.” Minutes later, they were sitting with their ice water. Landers really looked at her for the first time when she handed him the ice water, “Like your robe.” “It’s Joey’s. He told me not to wreck it.” “Better take care of it then,” he nodded. “I shouldn’t be keeping you up with my issues. I should be thankful that God saw fit to give me a family. I don’t know why I feel like this.”

“It’s a shock. There isn’t a set of directions on how to handle shock.” “You know, at first, I was almost angry with raging jealousy at this man. He got to stay with my father because he slept longer! But then I realized, he lived out of a suitcase backstage. Then he was also orphaned, but he did have a family. The Meddow family must be wonderful folks to take in another child.” “I wonder what it was like to be a white kid growing up in a black family in Louisiana?” “I guess if he was loved, it didn’t matter.” He smiled faintly, “Like I had my Sister Agnes. I didn’t care if she was white, black, or green. She loved me and I could always count on her.” “You are right about that. I’m anxious to meet the kids. Your family has suffered much tragedy.” “Many families in the years of the World Wars and Depression did. We tend to forget what it was like before the advances in medicine, banking laws, and all. In those days, many folks never got to go to any school, so Dick and I were both very fortunate.” Then he looked at Autumn, “I would’ve liked to been able to talk to my father. Dick was lucky to at least have known him.” “Yes, that’s true. But Ben, , he lost him and had to suffer the loss of his death. He was a little boy then.” Ben’s eyes moved to hers, “I’d have never thought of that. Thanks for pointing that out. I needed that.” He set his water on the metal coffee table and put his feet up on it. Autumn put her water there beside his and then he raised his arm toward her. She sat back and leaned on his shoulder. She let him talk about his mixed feelings, wondering why his father gave him away or didn’t look harder for him. Why couldn’t he have found a different babysitter to care for both kids. She nodded, held his hand, and sometimes commented. Then the two sat there in silence for some time. In a while, Autumn realized that by Ben’s breathing that he had fallen asleep. She tightened Joey’s sweater around her and then fell asleep herself, with his arm over her shoulder. It was a while later, they woke up when they heard some folks talking in the

garden below on their way back to their room. Ben brushed her damp hair back from her face, “This humidity would take some getting used to. We’d better get some sleep. Thank you for talking with me.” She smiled, “Think you can sleep now?” “I can. You?” “Yes. Good night.” Both went to their rooms and crawled into their beds. They fell sound asleep, only to be awakened a short time later by the wake-up call. Autumn crawled out of the very comfortable bed and looked out the window. She muttered to herself as she headed to the shower, “Only crazy people get up this early!” A bit later, the phone rang and it was Landers. “Thanks for arranging the wakeup call. I’d have forgotten all about it. I can go to church by myself if you want to sleep in.” “And let you go to breakfast at Brennan’s alone? Not a chance.” “Okay. Can’t say I didn’t offer.” She smiled to herself and a prayer of thanks that his sarcasm was back. The Mass was rather full, which surprised Autumn. She sat next to Landers and when he finished his prayers before the service started, she whispered, “I never thought there would be so many people here.” “It’s a big city.” “I know, but still.” He smiled at her, “I like attending Mass with you.” “Really?” He grinned, “I take it isn’t your favorite thing to do.” “It’s okay, but no. It isn’t.”

“I appreciate that you do it for me.” Ben spoke to one of the priests as they left the service. Then he asked Autumn, “Would you mind if I visit with Father for a minute?” “No. I was going to suggest it.” Autumn nodded, “Where can I wait?” The priest overheard, “You can come to our offices. We may even be able to find you a croissant and some coffee.” They walked with the priest to the side of the church and to their offices. He offered them each some refreshments and then asked if Autumn would be comfortable waiting in the ante room. She said she was fine and had a book with her to read. “What are you reading?” the elderly priest asked. “Tale of Two Cities,” Autumn answered. “One of my favorites,” he responded. “Where are you?” “Near the end. It looks like Charles Darnay will be sent to the guillotine. Poor Lucy. She loves him so much.” “Wait until you see what happens.” “I’ve read it twice before, so I know. I still cry every time I read it. I think the second time a person reads it, after you realize Sydney’s sacrifice, you begin to like him more throughout.” “You may be correct. I might read it again.” Landers and the priest disappeared into the office and Autumn settled into her book. The two clergy must have talked for about an hour, but Autumn was grateful the man had time for Landers. She smiled to herself when she thought about how so many people in Dannonville thought that Catholics were all part of some evil cult. As far as she could see, there were some fine people in that cult! When the men returned, Autumn noticed right away that Ben looked more relaxed. The priest shook her hand, “Thank you for being so patient and for

being such a good friend to Ben.” “He’s always been there for me.” “Well, you have a nice day and enjoy your family, Ben. Keep in touch if you can. Bless you.” As they walked to the sidewalk, Autumn said, “We forgot to call a cab.” “I did in the office. Thanks for waiting. I needed that.” “You look more at peace.” “I am, but actually I was after we slept on that metal swing.” Then he crinkled his face, “I wonder what ever possessed someone to make a swing out of wrought iron. I think I will have permanent imprints on my butt from that seat.” Autumn started to giggle and he frowned, “What?” “It’s a good thing we don’t plan to sleep together every night on this side of the Hereafter! First, we were bruised on the hammock and then imprinted on the swing!” “I have no idea why I talk to you!” Ben made a face and then waved as the cab drove up. “Just don’t share your insights with too many people, okay?” “Trust me. Our secret is safe forever!” A few minutes later, the couple entered the pink building known as Brennan’s. They had a wonderful breakfast and ordered the Eggs Benedict. After they ordered, Landers chuckled. “I’ll never feel the same about Eggs Benedict.” “I like it that Dick named his son Benjamin for you. That was very thoughtful of him.” Autumn pointed out. “I think your family were very caring people. Maybe with more humanity than mine.” “It’s funny, isn’t it? We’ve spent this whole time dissecting our families. I wonder if anyone will ever try to figure us out.” “You’re such a dumbbell!” Autumn giggled, “They already do! Why do you

think that Joey hauled me to a shrink?” “Well, you…” Ben teased. “I can’t believe I was telling Vicaro what a nice man you were!” Ben became serious, “When did you do that?” “Last night. I was so worried about you. I called him before I went out to talk to you. I didn’t want to do the wrong thing and I didn’t know what to do. I hope you aren’t upset I did that.” She reddened, “I’m so sorry. I should’ve told you.” “Not at all. I was thinking about calling him. I’m glad you talked to him.” “I didn’t want to upset you any further last night. I know we don’t keep secrets, but I really didn’t mean to.” “I was a basket case last night. All that information threw me over the edge. Thank God you were there. What did Vicaro say, if you don’t mind telling me?” Autumn shared what Vicaro and Bart said and Ben shared some of what Father Montagne had told him. Their advisors agreed on most things and had offered some good advice. Then Autumn suggested, “I think we should stop somewhere and buy a camera. I think you’ll want pictures of your brother and the children. Won’t you?”

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After a delicious breakfast, the couple stopped to buy a camera. They decided on a Polaroid, because they thought it would be nice to have photos right away. On the way out of the store, Autumn saw some ragdolls and decided they should get one for the little girl. They chose one with orange-red hair and and an embroidered face. She was sixteen inches long and wore a red and white gingham dress with a white bib apron, and little black cloth shoes. Autumn inspected the doll and looked under her skirt to find ruffled pantaloons. Ben chuckled, “Why do women always do that? Every time a woman picks up a doll, the first thing she does is look under its skirt!” Autumn looked at him flatly, “True. One would think it would be a man that would do that.” He rolled his eyes, “Touché.” “Here is a cool dump truck,” Ben smiled broadly as he picked up the toy and looked it over. “I think it uses batteries and has a horn, lights and the bed lifts up.” Autumn giggled, “Did you look under the hood?” He shot her a dirty look, “Watch it.” Before they left the store, they had also bought some Lego building blocks, a plastic tea set, and some coloring books and crayons. By the time they climbed in the cab, they resembled Santa’s helpers. The cabbie chuckled, “Early Christmas shopping?” Ben beamed, “Just going to visit my nephew and niece. It’s best to come armed, right?” When they got to the Inn, they changed into comfortable clothes and then looked over their purchases, removed the price tags, and divided them into two bags.

They went downstairs to call for a cab, the lady at the desk made a suggestion, “Why don’t you have a coffee and we’ll give you a ride?” The couple looked at each other and nodded, “Thank you. That sounds good.” When they went into the library where the tea and coffee china was set out, Autumn gasped, “Look at that gorgeous china, Ben! Isn’t it great?” The lady from the desk overheard, “Are you fans of porcelain china?” “Yes, novice however.” “This is from Gien, . It is a copy, of course, of some antique pieces. Do you have any collections?” “No,” Landers explained, “We are irers. We have friends that have some Lomosov Pieces.” “Cobalt blue,” Autumn said, “It’s wonderful. Have you been a collector long?” “These were my uncles. He and my aunt collected. Their pieces are in these cabinets, but the pieces we use are copies.” “I can imagine. They are beautiful,” Autumn looked around. “I’ll call when the car is here. Have a nice day.” The lady smiled, “Crandall should be in this afternoon.” “If we aren’t back in time, tell him we’ll be here as soon as we can. We will take him out for dinner,” Landers offered. “I’ll do that. He always eats at the Po’ Boy down the road a piece.” “Sounds good. What is a Po’ Boy?” “It is a sandwich. Fried shrimp, pickles on a bed of coleslaw in a French bun. It’s great. Some folks like theirs with fried chicken pieces, but I like the shrimp.” “I am looking forward to trying it.” Landers nodded, “Thank you.” While they were enjoying their coffee, the lady from the desk came in. “Miss

Simms? There is a phone call for you. Would you like me to transfer it?” Autumn panicked, but Landers answered, “Thanks.” A minute later, the phone rang and Landers answered it. “This is Detective Owens from Corpus Christi. Is Autumn Simms there?” “This is Father Landers.” “Things are moving faster than we expected. The Police talked to Brad’s cousin. He said that Brad was in earlier that morning than the police realized. He received a phone call and had to run an errand about ten. He took his cousin’s car, a brown Plymouth. When he returned about forty five minutes later, his cousin said he was crabbing about how some women are so demanding. His cousin was surprised, not only about what Brad was grumping about, but also that he seemed rather shaken. That was apparently unlike him. The police reviewed the reports from the neighbors that day and two of them had reported that there was a brown Plymouth parked in the drive about ten that morning. When rereading the supposed suicide note, it looks more like a plea. While nothing is conclusive, we are feeling more that he had a direct hand in her death.” Detective Owens and Ben discussed a few other things before Ben said he would call him again in the morning. Ben hung up and sat down beside Autumn. “Want to put off the visit until later? I can see where you might need time to regroup. I’d understand.” “I know Ben, but I’m done. That man has ruined so many things, I’m not going to allow him to ruin things for you.” Then she kissed Ben’s cheek, “I’m anxious to meet your family and give the children their gifts.” Ben looked at her seriously, “I came here for you. That’s why I’m here.” “Well, Dude, I’m here for you. So, whaddyah gonna do about that?” He grinned, “Okay. Let’s go.” The two arrived in front of the small, one story home set on a large yard, in a lower middle class neighborhood. The yard contained a trike and a starter bike

with training wheels next to the house. A heavy metal mailbox by the picket fence displayed the announcement, ‘Landers Family’. Ben looked at it and nodded his head toward it. Autumn smiled, “Nice.” They went through the gate and up the cracked concrete walk. On the front step, Ben grabbed Autumn’s hand. “It’ll be good, right?” “It will be,” Autumn squeezed his hand. “It will be.” Inside, they heard little kids squealing and running around. They knocked. A minute later, the door opened and there stood two curly haired, little children, eyes open wide and expectant. It only took one shocked look and they screamed in fright, slamming the door shut on the couple. They could hear the kids screaming and running away from the door. Autumn and Landers turned to each other in astonishment and surprise. They heard Dick coming, “What’re you guys doing? Open the door! Good grief!” Then he opened it and motioned for Landers and Autumn to come in, but was not paying much attention. He was trying to calm his terrified children who were now cowering in a corner beside the sofa. “Kids. It’s okay. It is your Uncle Ben and Autumn. Come out. They won’t hurt you.” “You said it was Uncle Willie! We want Uncle Willie!” the little boy cried, never taking his eyes off the newcomers. “They aren’t our Uncle.” “No uncle,” the little girl held on to her brother’s shirt, with tears rolling down her cheeks. Dick was down on his knees in front of them while they cringed in the corner by the sofa, cajoling them. “It’s okay. Honest. Come out. Don’t be silly.” “He is you, Daddy! He got out of your mirror! Make him go away! I want Uncle Willie,” Benji stared. “Is he you, too? How did he get in you?” “Benji, calm down. He is my twin. We are brothers. He just looks like me.” Benji looked Ben over critically, “I don’t like him. Make him go away!”

“Benji, that’s not nice. He is a good guy. I want to visit with my brother. Now, come out of there and behave.” Benji raised his eyes at this imposter and evaluated the situation. Then he announced, “Aimee can.” The little girl frowned at him and gave her brother a big punch, “You’re bad, Benji. What if he bites?” “Stop it! Right now. Get out of there.” Dick said in frustration. “Your uncle will think you are animals.” “He is not my uncle.” Benji stated, crossing his arms in defiance. “My uncles aren’t that color. I know better. It is a bad trick.” “No, Benji, he was lost for a long time. We just found each other.” The young boy raised his eyebrows, “Where did you put him?” “Huh? I didn’t put him anywhere.” “You should hold your brother’s hand. You always tell me to hold on to Aimee’s hand, so she doesn’t get lost. You should, too!” “I guess you’re right. Can you come out now?” The little boy who just turned five never broke his gaze at the newcomer, “Will you make him go away?” “No, Benji. I want you to visit with him.” “I’ll stay here then. I’m never coming out.” “Okay, stay there as long as you want.” Dick conceded, “Will you come out, Aimee?” The little girl looked from her traitor brother to her father to this man who looked like him and then asked, “Is Uncle Willie here?” “He is coming over in a little while.”

“You hold my hand?” “I will.” Dick held out his hand to his daughter. She took it and then cautiously stood up, “You won’t let go?” “No, I won’t.” Then she gingerly came out, making certain that her father’s leg was between her and these interlopers at all times. Then he told his son, “You can come out when you’re ready, Benji.” “I’m not coming out in ever.” “Suit yourself.” Dick picked up his little girl and carried her over to his guests who were still standing just inside the door. The closer he got to them, the tighter she gripped his neck, until he was within five feet. Her tears started flowing, “No, Daddy.” “Okay,” Dick apologized, “Come in. I guess the kids are confused. I just got up and didn’t have time to really talk to them. I said their uncle was coming over. They love their Uncle Willie and probably thought it was him.” By now, Aimee had turned away from the guests and was burying her head in her Daddy’s shoulder. Ben nodded, sympathetically. “I felt about the same way last night. I have to it.” “Come on in. I have some coffee ready. Come over to the table.” Ben and Autumn went toward the table off the edge of the small living room and sat down “I will pour you some coffee.” Dick carried Aimee to the kitchen area to the side of table, “Aimee, can I set you down?” She shook her head no and gripped even tighter. Autumn came over to them, “Just tell me where to get the cups. I can do it.” Dick apologized and gave her directions. Autumn brought the cups over to the table and Aimee’s curiosity finally got the best of her and she had to see what this lady was doing. She peeked a few times and then seemed to gain confidence

that she wasn’t going to be eaten alive, and began to relax. Autumn asked Dick, “Does Aimee want something?” “Do you?” Her father asked. Aimee shrugged and Autumn smiled, “Your Uncle Ben and I have something for you. After you open it, I can help you have a treat.” That caught the little girls interest and she turned around in her father’s arms to watch. Ben removed the box containing the tea set and set it beside Aimee. She looked to her father who said, “Your Uncle Ben wants you to have this. Can you open it?” The girl was watching every movement like an eagle, “Daddy do it.” “No,” her father said, “If you want it, you have to open it yourself, and say thank you.” The little girl pouted and then buried her face back in his shoulder. Autumn sat down by Ben. He had taken the Polaroid camera out of its box and was loading it with film. Benji had moved from his hiding spot to behind the chair, which afforded him a better view of the table and what was going on. He now only had about a four foot dash to the front door, if he needed to make an escape. He was intrigued by what the strangers were doing, but was not about to extend an ounce of trust. After Autumn began helping Ben put the batteries in the camera and was no longer paying attention to Aimee, the tiny girl turned around and sat on her Dad’s lap. A bit at a time, her little hand moved closer to the brightly colored box. Dick began to relax, “I’m sorry. I have to apologize for the children. They normally are more polite.” “I have to say, this is a shock, even for a grownup,” Ben responded calmly, “I can’t imagine what it is like for them to see a carbon copy of their father at the door. They seem to be good children.”

“Thanks,” Dick nodded. “Sometimes, I even like them.” Autumn smiled, “Spoken like a true parent. It might take them awhile.” “So Autumn,” Dick continued, “We never got to talk much last night. I was rattling on about myself and rudely ignored you. Are you from South Dakota?” “We both live in North Dakota, but I am from Georgia. Ben was helping me work through a crisis and that’s why we came down here.” “I hope things worked out well.” “It got it settled, but it was a bad situation. We just came from Dannonville, outside of Atlanta where my family lives. We are going to meet our pilot friend, Crandall, here today. Tomorrow, we’ll fly home.” “That soon?” Dick groaned, “I was hoping we would be able to spend some time together.” “I’ve been gone a week already and really need to get back.” Ben replied, “But I do hope we can get together again soon. I want to get to know you.” “Me, too,” Dick nodded and then smiled as he watched his little girl pulled the box toward herself. “Would you like me to help you open this?” She nodded and shot a nervous glance to the visitors. “Will they be mad?” “No,” her Daddy assured her. “They brought it for you. Tell them thank you.” “I don’t know what it is.” He rolled his eyes, “And you certainly wouldn’t want to say thanks before you know, would you? Land sakes!” Autumn giggled, “Sounds sensible to me. What if she doesn’t like it?” “You’re a trouble maker,” Dick raised an eyebrow. “See?” Ben laughed, “That’s what I always tell you.” “One is bad enough,” Autumn grumped. “I don’t know if I can handle two!”

Aimee’s bravery had taken over and the little girl was now moving quickly. Her Daddy helped her pull the lid off and then she saw the set. It was hard plastic and mimicked a tea set of fine china. The little girl’s eyes sprang open and her tiny hands covered her mouth as she said, “Ohh! Look Daddy!” “Isn’t it pretty? That was very nice of them to bring this to you. Can you tell Uncle Ben and Autumn thank you?” She looked at them and the whispered to her Dad, “Ben is behind the chair. He is not Ben, he is you.” Dick tried to explain, “He is my twin. Twins are copies of each other. His name is Ben, too. He is your Uncle Ben. Benji is your brother.” She considered this information and then made a face. She turned to Autumn and said, “Thank you, Auntumn.” “Her name is Autumn.” The tiny girl looked at her Dad and repeated slowly, “Auntumn.” “I like that, Aimee. That is very nice. May I call you Aimee?” “Okay.” Autumn beamed, “Would you like me to help you take the dishes out? Maybe you would like some water or milk in your teapot?” “Can I, Daddy?” Dick nodded, “I think my kids are going to need a shrink after today.” Ben smiled, “Maybe we could get a group rate.” Autumn helped Aimee remove the little cups and teapot and then rinsed them out for her. By the time they decided that Kool Aid would be very nice in the teapot, they were friends. Autumn handed her the tiny cup and saucer to carry to the table, while she carried the teapot, the little girl put it at the place between her Daddy and Autumn. Then she climbed up on the chair and sat as close to Autumn as she could. She studied her every movement. When Autumn put a

napkin on her lap, Aimee did the same. Dick noticed and he and Ben shared a grin. It was apparent that Aimee had a new heroine. They were just beginning to visit when they heard a pickup pull up out front of the house. Benji looked out the screen door and then dashed out front in a flash, leaving the door wide open. Dick shook his head, “Must be Willie. I asked him to stop by. Hope that is okay?” “I’d like to meet him,” Ben said. Out front, Benji rushed to his uncle and climbed up his front and into his arms. He had relayed the entire story to him before they got to the step. Willie was comforting the boy until the kid asked if he would make this man go away. “Sorry, Benji. I won’t do that. Ben is your uncle, too. You never got to meet him before, but I think you’ll be glad to know him.” “No. I won’t. He is a copycat. He copycatted my Dad and then he copycatted my name. That’s a bad trick.” “Boy, he didn’t do those things you say! ” Willie tried to explain, “ when Uncle Eugene’s dog had those two puppies? They looked just alike. That is like your Daddy and Ben.” The boy squirmed in his uncle’s arms and he scowled, “My Daddy is not a coonhound. Don’t say that stuff.” Willie’s face contorted in a deep chuckle, “I know, Benji, but it is the same thing. Those puppies were twins, which means they look alike. Your Daddy and his brother, Ben, were born at the same time and look alike.” Benji thought a second, “Like Gran-mere’s little kitties?” “Just like that.” “Oh, nobody told me.” The boy seemed to be reconsidering, “But he still copycatted my name!” Dick had brought a cup of coffee for Willie, who was now carrying Benji to the table. “Benji. That is my fault. Listen. Ben is not the copycat. Ben was born

before me and I copied how he looked. And then when you were born, I named you after Ben. So, he had your name first.” The little boy broke into tears, “Did he come to get my name back now? What am I going to do? I won’t have any more names! Bummer. Big bummer!” Aimee watched her brother, and started to tear up, “Bumper.” Ben couldn’t stand it and moved over to the boy. He put his arms around him, “No Benji. I think we should share our name. Would that be a good idea?” “I thought it was only mine.” “Boy, do I know that feeling.” Ben chuckled, “I thought it was only my name too, but it is a good one. I think we can both use it. Benji, let’s both use our name and see who has the most fun with it. I really like Benji. Do you want to know something funny? Most folks call me Landers.” “All the time? Like at dinner and when you get your bath?” “Yes, sir. Only Autumn calls me Ben all the time.” “What do I call her? Is she your Mom?” “No. She is my very best friend. I call her Autumn, but you know what? Some of our other friends call her Leaves.” The little boy’s eyes sprang open and he started to giggle. Then Aimee who had been watching his reaction, relaxed and smiled. He giggled and giggled until he got the hiccups. Then Autumn groaned, “It isn’t that funny, Benji.” Apparently Benji thought it was, but he did settle down with a glass of Kool Aid. After a bit, he whispered to his Uncle Willie, “Can I call her Leaves?” Autumn heard and nodded, “You can, but only if you don’t giggle.” The little boy tried to contain his merriment, “I won’t too much, Leaves.” Ben looked at his nephew and liked the kid. He asked him, “Autumn and I brought you a present too, but we don’t know if you want it. Should we take it

back to the store?” The kid looked to his Dad, who answered, “It’s up to you, Benji.” The boy thought and then conceded, “I guess I could look at it.” Ben handed the large box to Willie who helped Benji open it. He was so excited with the dump truck, he could hardly contain himself while Willie put the batteries in it for him. He asked his Dad if he could go play and his Dad said, “Not until I hear you apologize and then say thank you.” Benji considered the negotiation, “I guess I was sort of naughty.” “Well?” his Dad prodded. “I’m sorry. I never knew about copycats and stuff.” Then he looked at the dump truck, “I really like the truck. Thanks.” “You’re very welcome, Benji.” Landers smiled. Dick nodded, “You can go play now.” The little boy moved into the living room, but Aimee stuck by Autumn and seemed to have no interest in leaving. Willie smiled and his deep baritone laughter filled the room, “Seems the flies have settled.” “What?” Autumn gave him a quizzical look. “I mean, things are calmed down until the next buzz around.” “Amen,” Ben agreed. “I forgot you are a priest,” Willie acknowledged. The men slipped into a conversation about their previous childhoods. The tall, gangly Willie began, “My father was in a swing band back in the days before the Market Crash. That’s where he met up with your dad. They were great friends. He knew your father and how he suffered from the loss of his dear wife.”

“Did he ever say what she died from?” “Only that she was weak and had a bad cough by the end. He always said her heart gave out.” “Could have been congestive heart failure. Those patients often get a very bad cough near the end,” Autumn responded. “Might have been at that. In those days, people just died, you know. No matter, really. You can’t bring them back even if you know how they went.” Willie nodded, “But then when the band had to go on the road to make ends meet, Benedict was forced to make a horrible decision. I guess he didn’t know if he should give both boys up, or just one. He wanted to honor his wife so much, he thought he would do what he could and only gave up one. I don’t know what I would do in that case.” “Must have been heart wrenching,” Ben agreed. Dick responded, “I felt guilty all my life, knowing Dad kept me. Even though it wasn’t more than the flip of a coin about who went. When Dad couldn’t get over it, I thought it was because he felt he had given the wrong one away.” Willie wagged his head, “I don’t think it’s possible to make a straight board from a twisted tree. There are some things you just can’t make right. It was a dreadful circumstance.” Autumn frowned and Ben asked, “What is it, Autumn?” “We can look at it that way, or another way. Maybe everyone won something. Dick grew up in your family and has a fine family of his own. Ben made a life with the church and has helped many people. Now, we can all be together and appreciate them both.” Dick’s expression changed and then he looked at his twin, “I can see why she is so dear to you!” Autumn was anxious to change the subject, “So, I hope I’m not being rude, but I have to ask something.” “What’s that?” Willie asked, because she was looking at him.

“Is your last name truly Meddow? And was your father named Strawberry?” Benji looked up from his playing and interjected, “Paw Paw Strawberry went to heaven. Daddy says we get to see him someday.” “That’s true, Benji. You will.” Willie answered, “Strawberry was his nickname. His real name was Batiste, but I guess he was known for slurping up all the strawberry jam whenever he could. Meddow is the real last name, but I think the spelling was different years ago. And before you ask, I got my name Wagon because I used to ride in the wheelbarrow whenever I could.” “Then why didn’t they call you Wheelbarrow?” Ben asked. “You know, the only other person in the world that ever asked me that was Dick. You guys must be related.” Willie chuckled, “By the way, Dickie, I thought you said you had some gumbo for our lunch. I don’t see it.” “It’s in the fridge. I guess I should put it on the stove.” Dick stood up, “Oh, I got that wooden box Dad left for us.” Aimee was getting restless, but stayed steadfast beside Autumn. Autumn said, “Aimee, would you like to help me take our cups to the sink and then we can see if Uncle Ben has more gifts in his paper bags. Okay?” “Okay, Auntumn.” They took the bags into the living room, while Dick put the large pot of gumbo over the heat. Then he reached the box from the top of the refrigerator. “I got it out last night and put it up here.” Ben was helping Autumn open the bags for the kids and Willie grabbed the camera and asked, “Mind if I take a few?” “That’d be nice,” Ben smiled, “Take two of everything so we each have a set. We bought a lot of film.” The kids were very excited with their gifts. Benji put the Lego’s in his truck and then dumped them. He repeated the process over and over. Aimee loved her doll and named it Uncle Auntumn. Then Autumn and the kids picked out coloring books and stretched out on the floor to color.

Dick gave the large gumbo pot a stir and turned the heat on. The men gathered at the table to open the box which was about the size of a boot box. It was a pine box with two clasps on it. It wasn’t locked, but did hold some very valuable treasures. Dick moved it in front of Ben and said, “You do the honors.” Willie took a couple pictures and then asked if they wanted to be alone. Ben looked up, “No. I think we have been alone too much. It is time for alone to stop. Autumn? Will you us?” “Me, too, Uncle Ben?” Benji asked. Ben smiled, “Yes, you too. Our whole family.” “I bring Uncle Auntumn along,” Aimee announced, clutching her rag doll. After everyone was gathered around, with Ben and Dick sitting together, the lid was opened.

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On the top was a yellowed envelope labeled ‘for my sons’ on the top. Ben opened it and couldn’t stop his hands from shaking. He unfolded it and read with a quivering voice,

“My dear sons,

If you are reading this, it means that you found each other. Thank God. I can never tell you how very sorry I’m that you two were separated. I hoped I’d be able to reunite you again, but as with many things, life had a different idea. I trust both my sons will forgive my decisions and inability to keep my family together. I pray you can enjoy a valuable relationship with each other. Please know that your mother and I always loved you both. I asked my dear friend Strawberry to keep these things for you and to let you know to open it when you are together. I hope these things will be cherished by you both.

With my sincere love, your father, Benedict Landers”

Both Landers men were in tears before Ben finished reading the letter. But Willie, the black man with a deep voice and a very soft heart, was in worse shape than either of them. Autumn smiled at him and gave him a hug, “You are a big teddy bear.” “It tweaks at my heart,” the man wiped his tears.

Benji watched the whole thing in frustration and then asked, “Are you gonna open the presents or cry?” Ben chuckled, “Do you think we should look through the box?” The kid rolled his eyes, “Well, yahhhh. Maybe your daddy gave you toys!” The men went through the box and found a lot of valuable papers. There were birth certificates, their parent’s marriage license, their father’s military release, and their mother’s death certificate. Aside from the legal documents, there were newspaper notices of various events. There were a few photos. One of the Benedict and Doreen, most likely at their wedding, and then one small photo of the boys shortly after they were born. The children thought the baby pictures were very funny, but decided to go back to playing. The adults poured over the contents of the box. There was a paper, turning custody of Dick to to Batiste and Mathilda Meddow and then apparently, Strawberry had added the last paper, Benedict’s death certificate. Also inside the box, they found Doreen’s wedding ring. It was a modest plain golden band with three black rectangular stones. There was the wedding band that Benedict was wearing when his body was found. Doreen’s small Rosary and Benedict’s dog tags were wrapped in some crème colored tissue. Willie opened a document that seemed to be an old family tree of Doreen’s family that was last updated after the boys’ birth. It was sparse, but did reveal some information. He read it over and then said, “I think you should take this to some person that does this sort of thing and see what you can find out.” “I guess that would be okay,” Dick grinned. “What do you think, Ben?” “Sure. Do you know anyone who does that?” “No, but we can find someone!” Willie’s booming laugh filled the room. “Just think, Dickie, you might be royalty! Then you might be of a mind to give me a part of your kingdom.” “Don’t hold your breath, Wagon. You don’t look good in blue!” Dick made a face. “You probably are closer to having more royalty than we do.”

“What is your nationality?” Autumn asked. “We are about half French, quarter Spanish and the rest is from Jamaican slaves. Of course, we only know they originated in Africa, but that is a big place. The Spanish were some of the conquistadors and the French were aristocratic plantation owners here on the Delta. I guess they had an eye for my beautiful ancestors.” “Yah,” Dick scowled, “Then you came along and the family line went down with a glub-glubbing!” Willie smirked, “That only happened when we took in the white chile. Do you how we decided to get you sunburned so you’d be dark like the rest of us kids? We really got such a switching for that plan!” “Of course. You tried to burn me, you fishbone! I even had blisters! And it was all your idea.” “No, it was yours as well. You wanted to be like me! I was a beautiful lad.” Willie explained, “It looks like your family is mostly German and English. I guess most English royalty is German, so maybe you have a Duke or Duchess in the woodpile. Duke Dickie.” Autumn interrupted, “Let’s see what we can find out from someone who knows how to do that. I can ask my mother. She traced our family tree.” “Were you nobility?” Willie asked. Autumn giggled, “Not quite. My mother’s side are hill people from the Appalachians, mostly known as hillbillies. That region was largely settled in the 1700s by the Scotch-Irish, the majority of whom originated in the lowlands of Scotland. No one ever had money but they were a stubborn and proud lot. My father’s father came to America as an indentured servant. He had to work as a servant to the man who paid his fare over for seven years. The man was a weaver and so he learned that trade. After he became a free man, he met a Swedish girl who had also been an indentured servant for fourteen years! They married and became the founders of my father’s family. Mother was disappointed that there was no greatness lurking in our background, but my dad was just glad no one had been hanged for thievery!”

The adults chuckled and then Willie observed, “I forget that many white folks were servants, too. Maybe we are kin?” “Where we live in North Dakota, we have some Sioux Indian friends. They talk about tiyospaye. It is a Sioux word pronounced tee-yoe′-schpah-yae that means extended family. So, yes, Willie. I think we are kin. Tiyospaye.” “Cool. Indians huh?” With that, Benji flew over to the table, “You know cowboys and Indians? Daddy, did you hear that?” Ben smiled, “Benji, Autumn and I both have horses and go riding. Autumn, do you have the photo of Clarence in your wallet?” “Oh, yes.” She retrieved it. Benji studied the picture, “Is he your kid?” “No, but he is tiyospaye.” “Does he have a name?” “It is Clarence Grey Hawk.” The little boys face lit up, “Daddy, did you hear that? Does he call you Leaves? Does he have a horse? A bow and arrow? Is he my size? What is that pie he has? Do you think he wants to meet me? Does that kid call you that teeyo thing? I bet we could play, huh?” Aimee was now in the act and patting Autumn’s arm, “Girl Innians? Dollies?” “Hey kids, what do you say we go over on the sofa and I’ll tell you all about them. Most of the kids call me Miss Leaves, and yes, there are girl Indians and they have dolls…..” Autumn took the kids into the living room and they became engulfed in a huge discussion of pies, Indians, and nicknames. After they left the table, Willie watched them a bit and then smiled, “That lady is a keeper. If I was you, I would be looking for a loophole in my church contract.”

Ben laughed, “Why Willie, I believe you are a bit of a lecherous thing.” “Man, can’t pull the wool over on you!” Willie chuckled. After a bit, they had the gumbo and then Aimee promptly fell asleep on Autumn’s lap. Benji was quietly coloring on the living room floor while the adults visited. The afternoon flew by and everyone shared stories of their lives. Autumn had even explained about why she and Ben came down South and how they discovered that Brad was likely a serial killer. The men decided that when she found another fellow, they would have to check him out for her. By four-thirty, Autumn reminded Ben that they needed to get back to the Barge Inn to meet Crandall. “I can go, if you want to stay and visit longer.” “No, Crandall has been a saint to fly us all over. I better go. I promised to take him out to dinner. Guess he loves Po’ Boys.” “Oh yes, Po’ Boys.” “You folks like that place?” Willie asked. “I always wanted to live there!” “Never ate there, but Crandall does.” Ben answered, “Is it good?” “Very,” Dick said. “Why don’t you us?” “If we wouldn’t be intruding? Wagon and I have to have the kids home before Belle comes over at seven and then we need to be at work by seven-thirty.” “Belle?” Benji answered Autumn, “She is our sitter. She tells us to pick up, wash up, and shush up. She doesn’t giggle like you do.” “Do you think you might give her a headache?” “Only Aimee does. I have to be grownup or Dad will switch me. You ever been switched, Miss Leaves?”

“In my family, we got paddled, but yes. Do you get switched a lot?” “No, because I am a good behaver.” Dick made a face, “Oh, that’s why. I thought maybe it was because I’m always sleeping.” “No.” The kid looked at him straightforwardly, “It’s because I’m good.” Willie laughed, “After Benji shines up his trophies, we can meet up with you at Po’ Boys.” “I will give Belle a call and tell her our plans so she doesn’t think we ran off,” Dick said. “I hate to see you take off tomorrow. I feel like we just scratched the surface.” Willie made a serious suggestion, “Well, then I think when the band takes our summer break, you should go up and see where Ben lives. You will have two weeks in August.” “I doubt we could afford that.” “I’ll help buy your gas because I’d like a break from you.” “Wagon? I’m shattered. Don’t you like me?” Dick whined. Willie broke into his big laugh. “Nope, Dickie. Never much did.” Willie gave Ben and Autumn a ride to the Barge Inn, while Dick got his children and house cleaned up. Willie was going to wait outside for them, but Ben wouldn’t have it. “What sort of dumb idea is that?” “Many white folks don’t like my kind hanging around.” Autumn made a face, “Wagon Willie! Those folks dress like Frankenstein and mummies! What would they know about who should hang around?” He started to laugh, “I have to say, I have been curious about this place. It is a spooky one.” “Come on in,” Ben waved. “I’ll tell them you’re my brother.”

Willie laughed, “Don’t be surprised ending up sleeping in the chicken coop.” They entered the lobby and the lady at the desk smiled. She said that Crandall had just checked in. Then she studied Willie a second and Ben became concerned. Then she asked, “Excuse me, are you the Wagon Willie?” “Yes, ma’am.” Willie answered. “Want me to wait outside?” “Heavens no! I love your band. The husband and I go to see you whenever we can get away.” The two were soon chatting about local jazz hangouts and Ben interrupted, “We will go get cleaned up and call Crandall.” “He’s in 214,” the lady answered, but was so busy chatting, she didn’t even turn her head. The couple went upstairs and Autumn whispered, “I was worried a minute.” “Me, too, but I think they have formed an impenetrable bond.” He grinned. Ten minutes later, they were all downstairs waiting on Autumn. Crandall had been introduced to Willie and caught up briefly with Ben’s news. When Autumn approached, Crandall gave her a hug and a smack on the cheek! He laughed, “You really tore it up this week. I don’t know what you could do with a month out in the world! It’s best I take you back to North Dakota to rest yourselves.” “I think you’re right. Serial killers and missing person mysteries….not bad work for a pair of greenhorns,” she grinned. “Thank you so much for carting us all over. I told Ben I would have to be nice to you for a month!” Crandall raised his eyebrows, “An entire month?” “He said I should be nice to you always, but we both know I can’t do that!” He chuckled, “Yah. I know. You’ll play hell handling it for an entire month!” They had a good supper at Po’ Boys. Landers and Autumn loved the sandwiches and little Benji loved explaining how they were made. “See,” Benji explained, “The man tricks the shrimp to jump into the cooker thing. He says to them it is a swimming place. When they are all cooked up, he picks him out and puts him on the slaw. They grow the slaw here, you know. Right by the door.”

“Oh really. How did you know that?” Ben asked. The kid shrugged, “Just a lucky guess.” Crandall chuckled, “Got the gift of gab like your uncle. Autumn gave the boy a hug and kiss on the cheek. His eyes flew open in horror, “Uncle Ben, does she do that very often?” “No,” the man assured him, “Rarely. Should I tell her to keep it down?” The boy nodded, “I don’t like that much.” Crandall smiled, “Someday, my boy, that will change.” “Nope. No way. Ever.” Before everyone left, they had exchanged phone numbers and addresses. Plans were hatched for the Southerners to spend some time on the prairies during their summer break. Crandall would fly them up and also invited Willie. “I need you to hear my music that I play during flights. Most of my customers don’t like it, but I think they just don’t know what they are talking about. I’d like a second opinion.” Landers laughed, “Crandall, we all like your music, but you play the same few songs over and over and over. Tell me, do you have a lot of folks bale out?” “Why do you think I equip the planes with parachutes?” After some kisses goodbye, the three were dropped off at the Barge Inn. Crandall was going into the ‘library’ to have a drink and they were going to him. After visiting over a cup of tea, Autumn decided to cash it in for the night. She wanted to take a hot bath, pack, and then finish her book. She offered to take Lander’s box up to her room to pack. He and Dick had decided that Ben would make copies, look up information, and then they would divide the materials when they got together in August. “I’ll come along,” Ben said, “I’ll get your pill.” “I don’t need one. I still have the one from last night.”

Ben frowned slightly, “Why didn’t you take it? You were supposed to.” “Ben, I didn’t want to sleep too soundly in case you might need me.” She put her hand on his shoulder as she got up, “You were more important last night. I’ll take one tonight and get back on track. I’m glad you’re feeling better.” “I am, and thanks for helping me,” Ben answered, “I appreciate it. I’ll set up wake up calls for the morning. Have a good night.” Autumn went up the eerie staircase to her room. She couldn’t help but wonder what sort of people stayed at this Inn, on purpose. Then she realized that it was people like her! It was actually a nice place, although she could have done without the carnivorous landscaping. After her bath and finishing her packing, she curled up in the wing chair with her book by Dickens, Tale of Two Cities. She cried again, when Sydney made the supreme sacrifice for his love, Lucy, so that she could be with the one she loved. Before he stepped up to the guillotine in Charles’ place, he said, ‘It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done;” The times before when she had read the book, she thought it was a moving thing for him to do. This time, in her present situation, it meant so much more. In the book, Sydney put Lucy’s desires above his own. Now she realized that there is a much stronger love than sharing the white picket fence and three-point-one children scenario.

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Autumn curled up in her blankets and thought about her life. With her fiancé, Brad, everything was about him, his plans, and his feelings. She thought she loved him, or what she felt was love. It was what a proper woman did. Maybe that is the way they all felt. Even when he was unbending and demanding about what he wanted, she relented. That was what a good wife did. Right? He rarely considered her opinions or interests, because they really didn’t matter. When he demanded sex before marriage, which was something they had always said they would never do, she relented, not that she was given a choice. She had soon learned that one had to do what Brad wanted, or face his wrath. She was always surprised how he could hold his temper in front of others, but alone, had no filter. In fact, he seemed to relish bossing and demanding. While sex with him was far from enjoyable as she had heard it was supposed to be, she had decided maybe it was her fault. He said it was. He always pointed out her failures and mistakes. Maybe she didn’t know what she was doing. After all, proper Southern ladies never talked about such things. From nurses training, she knew his idea of sex was not normal. She felt trapped however. They weren’t yet married, and single ladies of stature did not discuss their sexual problems. The only thing that he thought was erotic or offered release was when he made her suffer. He enjoyed burning her, or terrifying her in some way. But his favorite was to choke her until she ed out. She tried to talk to him about it, but he threatened to tell everyone premarital sex was her idea. And he pointed out, everyone would believe that she did it just to keep a good catch like him. Now, she thought she would talk to Dr. Samuels about it. She knew Joey knew, but wasn’t certain that Landers did. They had never discussed it. But for her part, if that was all there was to sex, she certainly couldn’t call it love making. She put her book in the suitcase and crawled into bed. After she was curled securely in her cocoon, she went over her feelings about Landers. He always tried to understand her and he respected her as a valuable part of their team. He was straight with her and made it easy for her to be straight with him, since she

didn’t have to fear his reaction. With Brad, that had always been a concern. She hated the look that came over him when he was told no, and had to it that she had always been terrified by it. He had only knocked her around a few times. Of course, it would have been improper to mention such behavior in polite company. At any rate, she was very content with her life. She didn’t want to start a relationship with a man, now for certain, and likely forever. She knew that it would take some time to work through all of Brad’s scars. Besides, she had a dear friend, emotional , and someone she could share things with. Right now, Ben filled all those needs, and she felt that she filled those needs for him, also. Ben was always there to listen, even though he did not always to agree. He was okay with her disagreement or teasing, and didn’t require that she be in awe of him. It was comfortable and fun. She loved that. It was very different from anything she had ever experienced in her life. While she was thinking about it, she drifted off to sleep. She was so pleased that he had found his family and hoped it afforded him happiness. She wanted that for him.

Autumn determined that wake-up calls should be outlawed. They were certainly a creation of the demon world, in the same categories as enemas and tooth extractions. But she was ready to travel in no time and was waiting by her door when Ben knocked. Together, they moved their bags out into the hallway and were getting organized to tote their things to the elevator, when Crandall emerged from his room. He had a duffle thrown over his shoulder and grinned, “Tourists! You just don’t know how to pack! Let me help you with all that.” Autumn carried Benedict’s box and her huge handbag. Ben and Crandall divided the rest. While waiting for the elevator, Crandall shared, “I called the airport. There’s a storm front stumbling across the belly of the continent, so we might be wise to take off a bit later and avoid it. We can drop the baggage at the airport and then I’ll treat you to Café du Monde, the home of the Beignets. Have you eaten there yet?” “No, we ate at Brennan’s yesterday,” Landers nodded, “What do you think, Autumn? Beignets?”

She nodded eagerly, “Vance said we have to try them. He said the café opened in the 1800’s?” “Yes, 1862, I believe. Vance is a walking travel brochure.” Crandall chuckled, “Then we can take a cab to the airport. You got everything? Any more mysteries to unravel or crimes to solve before we head home?” “You are a barrel of laughs, there Crandall.” Landers rolled his eyes, “Do you have a first name?” Crandall abruptly nodded, “I do.” Autumn made a face, “Well, are you going to share it?” “No way in hell.” Crandall stated, “I told Nora and then threatened her life if she repeated it.” “Must be a humdinger!” Landers laughed, “Too bad Nora isn’t Catholic.” “Why?” Crandall asked. Ben chuckled, “Confessionals can provide a wealth of information in the right hands.” “Man, you guys have a racket!” Crandall wagged his head. When they got to the desk, there was a message to call Detective Owens. Ben placed the call and talked to him, while waiting for their cab. “Seems the folks in Oregon looked into the case again, but decided there was still not enough evidence to warrant reopening, especially since Brad was now deceased. Vander Vorsts had paid for Patty’s funeral expenses at the time as a gesture of kindness.” Owens said sarcastically, “More like payoff in my book. But so be it. We talked to the men on the Starfish again, and they gave affidavits. Jerriman’s attorney will be initiating a civil trial.” “So there’ll be a public trial,” Ben said. “Maybe not. I think Vander Vorsts may want to settle.” Owens continued, “Forensics in Atlanta went over the pill bottles near Camille’s body when she

was found. They were covered with Brad’s prints. So, Harmon’s family may sue also. We talked to Jake Harmon and discovered that he had lured Brad to the apartment, intending to beat the man to a pulp. However, when Jake took the first swing at him in the front yard, Brad jumped in his car and took off hell bent for election. A neighbor saw that. It was right before the accident. We know that Ray Jerriman and Jake Harmon both owned green vehicles, had opportunity, and a good motive to drive him off the road, but the combined law enforcement has more or less decided he was simply driving erratically, probably in fear of being caught for all he had done. We feel it would serve no justice to investigate Ray or Jake.” Ben nodded into the phone, “We would agree. We are heading home now, and I will call when we get back to North Dakota.” “Have a safe trip!” Over a leisurely breakfast of warm jelly-filled beignets and café au lait, the three visited about New Orleans and all they had done. They were ready to go home. It was after ten before they were in the air on their way home. Ben sat in the copilot position and Autumn was more than happy to curl up in the back seat. She closed her eyes to drowse while she listened to the men chat. Ben reached back to check that she was comfortable and then went back to their conversation. Crandall was telling about his search for his lost love Moira. “Had I known you two were such good detectives, I’d have put you on the case. You know, if I could live my life over, I’d never be so damned selfish. I knew my desires, but never once considered she might have some, too. Now I know, I was so very wrong.” “Humans have it all mixed up. It is often extremely difficult to put what is best for the ones we love first, especially if it means we don’t get what we want.” “Amen,” Crandall chortled. “And you say I’m not a good preacher!” Landers poked. “You aren’t too bad, if you are in the market for that sort of thing.” Crandall turned to Landers and asked him, “Have you ever considered leaving the priesthood?”

“Not as much as lately. I have gone through it from time to time, but it was never an honest consideration. I believe that a person should live up to their commitments. I don’t know if I could live myself if I didn’t honor my vows. Lately however, I worry that my vow may hurt people I care deeply about. I don’t know where the morality of that lies.” “Wish I could help you, but you know me! I just worry about me! I never have that kind of dilemma.” “You’re so full of it! You worry as much as anyone I know!” Autumn’s eyes were closed already, but she quit listening to them. She made another of her private internal vows. She knew what Ben was worried about and wanted to tell him that it was okay. She loved him and would continue to. He didn’t need to deny his vows for her. Part of what she loved about him was his devotion and loyalty. As for herself, she took some pride in thinking that maybe loving him in the only way acceptable and helping him keep his vows was for her, the better thing to do.