With Burning Hearts- Henri Nouwen 631a73

Henri

J.

M. Nouwen

A Meditation on the Eucharistic Life

WITH BURNING HEARTS A

Meditation on the

Eucharistic Life

Nouwen

Henri J.M.

ORBIS/ISBN 0-88344-984-6

who read this book food and drink on new will find here their journey to God."— Henri Nouwen "I

hope

that those

most popular of contema profound and beautiful reflection on the mean-

One

of the

porary

spiritual writers offers

ing of the Eucharist for ourselves and our communities. The word "eucharist,"

Nouwen

tells us, originally

comes from

And the Greek for "thanksgiving." while the ancient source provides one dimension of the Christian experience, Nouwen finds that the wisdom of prior insights no longer suffices in a world rapidly as ours. What we to realize the intimate con-

changing as

need

is

nection Eucharist,

between celebrating the and living a "eucharistic life."

With Burning Hearts seeks a fuller understanding of Eucharist through the story of the disciples on their way to Emmaus from Jerusalem after the crucifixion (Luke 24: 13-35). They did not know they travelled with the risen Christ until they recognized him suddenly in the breaking of the bread. Marveling, they asked one another, "Did our hearts not burn within us while

he was talking to us. .?" Their story models the order of the eucharistic celebration: the coming together in our brokenness before God, the hear.

Word, the profession of faith, the offering of the meal, and the going forth as Jesus bid them, to renew the face of the Earth. ing of the

Henri Nouwen shows us how the eucharistic event is intensely human,

revealing the deepest of rience: sadness

and

invitation,

and

loss,

intimacy

human expeartentiveness

and engage-

Digitized by the Internet Archive in

2010 with funding from University of Toronto

http://www.archive.org/details/withburningheartOOnouw

A

Meditation on

the Eucharistic Life

Henri

J.

M.

Nouwen

DRBIS^BOQ KS Maryknoll,

New

York

10545

The Catholic Foreign Mission Society of America (Maryknoll) recruits and trains people for overseas missionary service. Through Orbis Books, Maryknoll aims to foster the international dialogue that is essential to mission. The books published, however, reflect the opinions of their authors and are not meant to represent the official position of the society.

Copyright

©

1994 by Henri

J.

M.

Nouwen

Published in the United States by Orbis Books, Maryknoll, NY 10545-0308

No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage or retrieval system, without prior permission in writing from the publishers.

All rights reserved.

Excerpts from THE NEW JERUSALEM BIBLE, copyright © 1985 by Darton, Longman & Todd, Ltd. and Doubleday, a division of Bantam Doubleday Dell Publishing Group, Inc. Reprinted by Permission.

Manufactured

in the United States of

America

Library of Congress Catag-in-Publication Data

Nouwen, Henri J. M. With burning hearts J. M. Nouwen.

:

a meditation

on the eucharistic

cm. p. ISBN 0-88344-984-6 1. Lord's Supper — Catholic Church - Meditations. BX2169N68 1994

234M63-dc20

I.

life /

Henri

Title.

94-14622 CIP

To Michael Harank

and all those who

live

and work

at Bethany House of Hospitality,

a Catholic Worker house

in Oakland, California,

for homeless people living with AIDS

51

Contents

Acknowledgments Introduction

The Road I.

II.

to

1

Emmaus

Mourning Our Losses " "Lord, Ha ve Mercy

Word of God"

Entering into

"Take V.

21

37

Inviting the Stranger "I Believe"

IV.

1

Discerning the Presence "This Is the

III.

9

51

Communion

and Eat"

Going on "Go and

Conclusion

63

a Mission Tell"

93

Acknowledgments

This book was written in Chobham, England and

Sacramento, California. Bart and Patricia Gavigan offered

me

the lovely cottage at the Brookplace

conference center, and Frank Hamilton

cozy

his

home

let

me

the Beale Air Force Base.

at

I

use

am

deeply grateful to these special people, not only for

understanding

my need

and even more

so, for their

for a quiet space, but also,

ive friendship.

Special thanks go to Kathy Christie and Con-

rad Wieczorek for their very competent secretarial

and

To Sue Mosteller and Douglas helpful comments on the first draft

editorial help.

Wiebe

for their

and

my

to

editor,

, his

Robert Ellsberg, for his personal

many

insightful suggestions,

enthusiasm that helped

me

and his

book

to bring this

to

completion.

wanted to write it. Although nobody asked me, I had felt for a long time the urge to put down on paper thoughts and feelings about the Eucharist and the Eucharistic life that kept emerging in my mind and heart. This book was written simply because

As

I

started to present these thoughts

I

and feelings

Acknowledgments in lectures sire to

and conferences,

I

felt

an increasing de-

put them in a small book to give to people in

search of a spiritual

life

rooted in the Eucharist.

hope that those who read this book will find here some new food and drink on their journey to I

God.

10

Introduction

Every day in

I

celebrate the Eucharist. Sometimes

my parish church with hundreds of people pres-

ent,

sometimes

bers of

my

Daybreak chapel with mem-

in the

community, sometimes in a hotel

my

with a few friends, and sometimes in living

room with

without

my

suite

father's

him and me. Very few days

just

saying, "Lord, have mercy," with-

out the daily readings and a few reflections, without a profession of faith, without sharing the body

and blood of

and without a prayer for a

Christ,

fruitful day. Still I

wonder: Do

who

those

stand or

know what they are happen it is

sit

so familiar?

know

of ordinary Is it

ritual,

I

am

Do with me

doing?

around the table

part of?

Does something

And what about Is

really

— even though all those who are

the Eucharist

still

something

about, think about, or desire?

this daily celebration

not?

know what

that shapes our daily lives

not there with us? they

I

connected with the daily

men and women, be

more than

How

a lovely

life

they present or

ceremony, a soothing

or a comfortable routine? 11

is

And

finally,

does

Introduction

the Eucharist give

life, life

that has the

power of

overcoming death? All of these questions are very real to

constantly beg for an answer. Oh, yes,

I

me; they have had

seems that they don't last very long in my quickly changing world. The Eucharist gives meaning to my being in the world, but as the world

answers, but

it

changes, does the Eucharist continue to give

meaning? rist.

I

have read many books about the Eucha-

They were written

ten, twenty, thirty,

forty years ago. Although they contain insights, they

no longer help me

the Eucharist as the center of old questions are there again: life

it

be Eucharistic, and

tion of the Eucharist

how

make

even

many deep

to experience

my life. Today, the How can all of my

can the daily celebrait

that

way?

I

have to

come up with my own response. Without such a response, the Eucharist may become little more than a beautiful tradition.

This

and to

little

book

is

an attempt to speak to myself

my friends about the Eucharist and to weave

network of connections between the daily celebration of the Eucharist and our daily human experience. We enter every celebration with a contrite

a

heart and pray the Kyrie Eleison.

Word -

we

We

listen to the

the scriptural readings and the homily

profess our faith,

we

give to

God

-

the fruits of

work of human hands and receive from God the body and blood of Jesus, and finally

the earth and the

12

Introduction

we

are sent into the

world with the task of renew-

The

ing the face of the earth. reveals the deepest

human

Eucharistic event

experiences, those of

sadness, attentiveness, invitation, intimacy, and en-

gagement. live in

the

It

we are called to Only when we recognize

summarizes the

Name

of God.

life

the rich network of connections charist

and our

life in

be "worldly" and our As the basis for

Eu-

the world can the Eucharist

life 'Eucharistic."

my

and the Eucharistic

between the

reflections

on the Eucharist

will use the story of the

life, I

two disciples who walked from Jerusalem to Emmaus and back. As the story speaks about loss, presence, invitation, communion, and mission it embraces the

five

main aspects of the Eucharistic

celebration.

Together they form a movement, the movement

from resentment to gratitude, that is, from a hardened heart to a grateful heart. While the Eucharist

movement

expresses this spiritual

cinct way, the Eucharistic are invited to experience in every

moment

life is

in a

one

and affirm

in

this

very suc-

which we movement

of our daily existence. In this

lit-

book I hope to develop the five steps of this movement from resentment to gratitude in such a way that it becomes clear that what we celebrate and what we are called to live are essentially one tle

and the same.

13

The Road to

Emmaus

Now

same day, two of them were on their way to a village called Emmaus, seven miles from ferusalem, and they were talking together about all that had happened. And it happened that as they were talking together and discussing it,fesus himself came up and walked by their side; but their eyes were prevented from recognizing him. He said to them, "What are all these things that you are discussing as you walk along?" They that very

-II

stopped, their faces downcast.

Then one of them, called Cleopas, answered him, "You must be the only person staying inferusalem who does not know the things that have been happening there these last few days. " He asked, "What things?" They answered, "All about fesus of Nazareth, who showed himself a prophet powerful in action and speech before God and the whole people; and how our chief priests and our

handed him over to be sentenced to death, and had him crucified. Our own hope had been that he would be the one to set Israelfree. And this leaders

17

"

THE ROAD TO EMMAUS is it

not all; two whole days have all happened;

now gone by since

and some women from our group

have astounded

us: they

went

to the

tomb

in the

and when they could not find the body, they came back to tell us they had seen a vision of angels who declared he was alive. Some of our friends went to the tomb and found everything exactly as the women had reported, but of him they saw nothing. early morning,

Then he said slow

Was

to believe all it

"You foolish men! So that the prophets have said!

to them,

not necessary that the Christ should

suf-

fer before entering into his glory?" Then, starting

with Moses

and going through

all the prophets,

them the ages throughout the scriptures that were about himself When they drew near to the village to which they were going, he made as if to go on; but they pressed him to stay with them saying, "It is nearly evening, and the day is almost over. " So he went he explained

to

in to stay with them.

Now

while he was with them at table, he took bread the and said the blessing; then he broke it and handed it to them. And their eyes were opened and they recognized him; but he had vanished from their sight. Then they said to each other, "Did not our hearts burn within us as he talked to us on the road and explained the scriptures to us?"

18

THE ROAD TO EMMAUS They

set

out that instant and returned to Jeru-

salem. There they found the Eleven assembled

to-

who said to them, and has appeared to

gether with their companions,

"The Lord has indeed risen

Then they told their story of what had happened on the road and how they had recogSimon.

"

nized him at the breaking of bread. (Luke 24:13-35)

19

Mourning Our Losses 'Lord,

Have Mercy

Two

people are walking together. You

can see from the way they walk that they are not happy. Their bodies are

Jl

their other.

bent over, their faces are downcast,

movements

Once

in a

slow.

They do not look

at

each

while they utter a word, but their

words are not directed

to

each other. They vanish

in the air as useless sounds.

Although they follow

on which they walk, they seem to have no goal. They return to their home, but their home is no longer home. They simply have no other place to go. Home has become emptiness, disillusionthe path

ment, despair.

They can hardly imagine that it was only a few years ago when they had met someone who had changed their lives, someone who had radically interrupted their daily routines and had brought a new vitality to every part of their existence. They had

left their village,

friends,

and discovered a whole new

behind the ity in

followed that stranger and his

veil

which

reality

of their ordinary activities

forgiveness, healing, and love

23

hidden

—a

real-

were no

MOURNING OUR LOSSES longer mere words but powers touching the very

core of their humanity. The stranger from Nazareth

had made everything new. He had made them into people for whom the world was no longer a burden but a challenge, no longer a field of snares but a place with endless opportunities. He had brought joy and peace to their daily experience.

made

He had

their life into a dance!

Now he

is

dead. His

body

that

had radiated

had been destroyed under the hands of his

light

tortur-

His limbs had been ploughed by the instru-

ers.

ments of violence and hatred, his eyes had become empty holes, his hands had lost their grip, his feet nobodies. All

He had become a nobody among had come to nothing. They had lost

him. Not

him, but, with him, also themselves.

their firmness.

just

The energy that had filled their days and nights had left them completely. They had become two

human beings, walking home without having a home, returning to what had become a dark memlost

ory.

In

we

many ways we are like them. We know it when

dare to look into the center of our being and

encounter there our lostness. Aren't If

pain,

there

is

it is

the

Sometimes

it

lost too?

any word that summarizes well our

word

"loss."

We

even seems that

have

lost

life is just

so much!

one long

When we were born we lost the womb, when we went to school we

series of losses.

safety of the

we

24

Have Mercy"

"Lord,

when we got our first job we lost the freedom of youth, when we got married or ordained we lost the joy of many options, and when we grew old we lost our lost the security

of our family

life,

good looks, our old friends, or our fame. When we became weak or ill, we lost our physical independence, and when we die we will lose it all!

And

these losses are part of the ordinary

whose

life is

life!

But

ordinary? The losses that settle them-

selves deeply in our hearts

and minds are the

loss

of intimacy through separations, the loss of safety

through violence, the

loss of

innocence through

abuse, the loss of friends through betrayal, the loss

of love through abandonment, the loss of

through war, the heat,

and

loss of well-being

home

through hunger,

cold, the loss of children

through

illness

or accidents, the loss of country through political upheaval, and the loss of floods, plane crashes,

life

through earthquakes,

bombings, and diseases.

Perhaps many of these dark losses are far away

from most of us; maybe they belong to the world of newspapers and television screens, but nobody can escape the agonizing losses that are part of our everyday existence — the loss of our dreams.

We ful,

had thought so long of ourselves as successliked, and deeply loved. We had hoped for a

life

of generosity, service, and self-sacrifice.

had planned to become

ways gentle people.

We

forgiving, caring,

had

25

We

and

al-

a vision of ourselves

MOURNING OUR LOSSES and peacemakers. But somehow — even sure of what happened — we lost

as reconcilers

we

aren't

our dream.

We became

worrying, anxious people

few things we had collected and exchanging with one another news of the political, clinging to the

social,

and

ecclesiastical scandals of the day.

this loss of spirit that

edge and most But beyond of faith

—

It is

often hardest to acknowl-

is

difficult to confess. all

of these things there

is

the loss

the loss of the conviction that our

has meaning. For a time

we were

life

able to bear our

them with fortitude and perseverance because we lived them as losses that would bring us closer to God. The pain and suffering of life were bearable because we lived them as ways to test our will power and deepen our conviction. But as we grow older we discover that what ed us for so many years — prayer, worship, sacraments, community life, and a clear knowledge of God's guiding love — has lost its grip on us. Long-cherished ideas, long-practiced discilosses

plines,

and even to

live

and long-held customs of celebrating

life

warm our hearts, and we no longer why and how we were so motivated.

can no longer understand

We the time that Jesus was so real for us that

we had no

lives.

selor

question about his presence in our

He was our most intimate friend, our counand guide. He gave us comfort, courage, and

confidence.

We could feel him, yes, taste and touch 26

"Lord,

Have Mercy"

And now? We no longer think of him very much, we no longer desire to spend long hours him.

We no longer have that special him. We even wonder if he is more

in his presence.

feeling about

than

just a figure

out of a story book.

friends laugh at him,

mock

ignore him. Gradually

we

ization that for us too

somehow we

am

I

lost

have come to the

he has become

real-

a stranger

—

him.

each of our

lives.

if

of these losses

all

But as

gether and listen to each other

cover that many,

of our

name, or simply

his

not trying to suggest that

will touch

Many

we

we walk

will

soon

todis-

not most, of these losses are

own journey or the journey

part of the journey, our

of our companions.

What

do with our

to

losses? That's the first ques-

tion that faces us. Are

going to to

live as if

we

hiding them? Are

they weren't real? Are

keep them away from our fellow

we

we

we

going

travelers?

Are

going to convince ourselves or others that our

compared to our gains? Are we goblame someone? We do all of these things

losses are

ing to

little

most of the time, but there

is

another possibility:

the possibility of mourning. Yes,

We

cannot

we must mourn them away, but

our

losses.

we

can shed tears over them and allow ourselves

to grieve deeply.

talk or act

To grieve

is

to allow

to tear apart feelings of security

our losses

and safety and

lead us to the painful truth of our brokenness.

27

Our

MOURNING OUR LOSSES makes us experience the abyss of our own life in which nothing is settled, clear, or obvious, but everything constantly shifting and changing.

grief

And

as

we

feel the pain of

our

own

losses,

our

open our inner eye to a world in are suffered far beyond our own lit-

grieving hearts

which tle

losses

world of family,

friends,

and colleagues.

the world of prisoners, refugees,

AIDS

starving children, and the countless

It is

patients,

human

beings

Then the pain of our crying hearts connects us with the moaning and groaning of a suffering humanity. Then our mourning becomes larger than ourselves. living in constant fear.

But in the midst of

all

there

this pain,

strange, shocking, yet very surprising voice.

the voice of the one

who

mourn: they

who

shall

unexpected news: there

says: "Blessed are

is

a

It is

those

be comforted." That's the is

hidden in our

a blessing

Not those who comfort are blessed, but those who mourn! Somehow, in the midst of our tears, a gift is hidden. Somehow, in the midst of our mourning, the first steps of the dance take place. Somehow, the cries that well up from our losses grief.

belong to our songs of gratitude.

We come

to the Eucharist with hearts

broken by

many losses, our own as well as those of the world. Like the two disciples who walked home to their

we

"Our hope had been hope. Torture and death have come

village

say:

28

.

.

.

but

we

instead."

lost

Our

"Lord,

Have Mercy"

heads are no longer erect, looking forward, but 'downcast" and bent to the ground. This

is

how

the journey

starts.

The question

is

whether our losses lead to resentment or to gratitude. Resentment is a real option. Many choose it. When we are hit by one loss after another, it is very easy to become disillusioned, angry, bitter, and increasingly resentful. greater

The older we become, the

the temptation to say: "Life has cheated

is

no future for me, nothing The only thing to do is to defend the me. There

is

so that

left,

I

won't lose

hope

little

I

for.

have

it all."

is

one of the most destructive forces

It is

cold anger that has settled into the

Resentment in our lives.

to

center of our being and hardened our hearts. Re-

sentment can become a way of our words and actions that it

life

we no

that so pervades

longer recognize

as such. I

often

wonder how

no resentment

at all in

talking about people

I

memories about events to acting

how

I

would

my

live if there

heart.

do not that gave

I

am

like, to

so used to

harboring

me much

with suspicion and fear that

I

were

pain, or

do not know

would be if there were nothing to complain about and nobody to gripe about! My heart still has many corners that hide my resentments and I it

wonder if I really want to be without them. What would I do without these resentments? And there are many moments in life in which I have the op29

MOURNING OUR LOSSES portunity to nurture them. Before breakfast already had

many

I

have

feelings of suspicion, jealousy,

many thoughts about people I prefer to avoid, and many little plans to live my day in a guarded way. I wonder if there are any people without resentments. Resentment

our many

ment

losses.

is

such an obvious response to

The tragedy

that

is

hidden within the church.

is

much

It is

resent-

one of the

most paralyzing aspects of the Christian community. Still,

the Eucharist presents another option.

It is

the possibility to choose, not resentment, but grat-

Mourning our losses is the first step away from resentment and toward gratitude. The tears of our grief can soften our hardened hearts and open itude.

us to the possibility to say "thanks."

The word

means

"Eucharist"

literally

"act of

To celebrate the Eucharist and to Eucharistic life has everything to do with

thanksgiving." live a

gratitude. Living Eucharistically gift, a gift for is

which one

is

is

living life as a

grateful.

not the most obvious response to

not

when we

Still,

rist

experience

the great mystery

and

But gratitude life,

life as a series

we

certainly

of losses!

celebrate in the Eucha-

live in a Eucharistic life is precisely that

through mourning our losses

we come to know life

The beauty and preciousness of life is intimately linked with its fragility and mortality. We as a gift.

can experience that every day

30

— when we

take a

"Lord,

flower in our hands, in the

air,

Have Mercy"

when we

see a butterfly dance

when we caress a little baby.

giftedness are both there, and our joy

Fragility is

and

connected

with both.

Each Eucharist begins with a cry for mercy. There

is

Gods

probably no prayer in the history of

Christianity that has

been prayed so frequently and

intimately as the prayer "Lord, have mercy."

prayer that not only stands

all

the

the beginning of

West but

Eucharistic liturgies of the

an ongoing cry through

at

It is

also

all

sounds as

Eastern liturgies. Lord,

have mercy, Kyrie Eleison, Gospody Pomiloe.

It's

the cry of God's people, the cry of people with a contrite heart.

This cry for mercy

is

possible only

when we

are

somehow, somewhere, we ourselves have something to do with our losses. Crying for mercy is a recognition that blaming God, the world, or others for our losses does not do

willing to confess that

full justice to

ment we

the truth of

who we

are.

At the mo-

are willing to take responsibility, even

for the pain

we

didn't cause directly;

blaming

converted into an acknowledgment of our role in

human

is

own

brokenness. The prayer for God's

mercy comes from

a heart that

knows

that this

human brokenness is not a fatal condition of which we have become the sad victims, but the bitter fruit of the human choice to say "No" to love. The disciples who walked home to Emmaus were sad 31

MOURNING OUR LOSSES because they had

lost the

one in

whom

they had

were also deeply aware that their own leaders had crucified him. Somehow they knew that their grief was connected with

put

evil,

all

their hope, but they

an

they could recognize in their

evil that

own

hearts.

Celebrating the Eucharist requires that

we

stand

world accepting our co-responsibility for

in this

the evil that surrounds and pervades us. As long as

we

remain stuck in our complaints about the

which we

terrible times in

live

and the

terrible situ-

we have to bear and the terrible fate we have suffer, we can never come to contrition. And

ations to

contrition can

When

grow only out of

our losses are pure

fate,

a contrite heart.

our gains are pure

luck! Fate does not lead to contrition, nor luck to gratitude.

Indeed, the conflicts in our personal lives as well as the conflicts

scales are

our

sponsibility for

choosing a

life

on

regional, national, or

conflicts,

world

and only by claiming

re-

them can we move beyond them — of forgiveness, peace, and love.

The Kyrie Eleison — Lord, have mercy — must emerge from a contrite heart. In contrast to a hardened heart, a contrite heart is a heart that does not blame but acknowledges its own part in the sinfulness of the world and so has been made ready to receive God's mercy. I still

an evening meditation on Dutch 32

"Lord,

television during

on

Have Mercy"

which the speaker poured water

hard, dried-out

soil,

saying, "Look, the soil can-

not receive the water and no seed can grow." Then, after

crumbling the

water on that

it

soil

with his hands and pouring

again, he said,

"It is

only the broken

soil

can receive the water and make the seed grow

and bear

fruit."

After seeing this

I

understood what

it

meant

to

begin the Eucharist with a contrite heart, a heart

broken open, to receive the water of But

Gods grace.

how is it possible to begin a thanksgiving cel-

ebration with a broken heart? Don't the acknowl-

edgment of our sinful condition and the awareness of our co-responsibility for the evil in the world paralyze us? Isn't a true confession of sins too debilitating? Yes,

it

But no sin can be faced

is!

No loss can be that we will find

without some knowledge of grace.

mourned without some

new

intuition

life.

When the disciples walking to Emmaus told their story about their great loss, they also told that

strange story about the

the

women who

tomb empty and had seen

had found

angels. But they

were sceptical and doubtful. Wasn't he crucified a few days ago? Hadn't everything come to an end? Hadn't evil finally won? So what about these women's tales that he was alive? Who could take that seriously? But then again, they had to say, "Some of our friends went to the tomb and found 33

MOURNING OUR LOSSES everything exactly as the

him they saw

of

That's

women had reported,

but

nothing!"

how we

generally approach the Eucha-

With a strange mixture of despair and hope. Part of us looking at our own life and the lives of those around us wants to say, "Let's forget about it. It's all over. Oh, sure we thought about a better world, imagined a new community of love, and dreamt about a time in which all people would live together in peace. But the truth has caught up with us. We now know that all of this was little

rist.

more than an

illusion.

Our unchangeable

charac-

and persistent bad habits, our jealousies and resentments, our moments of anger and revenge,

ter

our uncontrollable violence, the countless signs of

human

cruelty, the crimes, the torture, the wars,

the exploitations

-

all

of these have surely

woken

us up to the bitter truth that our youthful hope has

been

crucified."

And

still

-

the other stories remain and con-

tinue to appear. Stories about a

saw

it

differently, stories

few people who

about gestures of forgive-

ness and healing, stories about goodness, beauty,

and

truth.

And

as

we

voices in our heart

listen carefully to the

we

realize that

scepticism and cynicism there

is

deeper

beneath our

a yearning for

and communion that doesn't go away even when there remain so many arguments to dismiss it as sentimental childhood memories. love, unity,

34

"Lord,

Have Mercy"

"Lord, have mercy, Lord, have mercy, Lord, have

mercy." That's the prayer that keeps emerging from the depth of our being and breaking through the walls of our cynicism. Yes, sinners; everything

hopes and dreams. is

enough

for you!"

is

lost

Still,

and

we are sinners,

and nothing

there

we

is

hopeless

is left

a voice:

of our

"My grace

cry again for the heal-

ing of our cynical hearts and dare to believe that,

indeed, in the midst of our mourning,

be grateful for. But for special companion!

a gift to

need

a

35

we can

find

this discovery

we

II

Discerning the Presence This Is the

Word of God

s

the

Aing

two

their loss,

walks by their

Jl

walk home mournJesus comes up and

travelers

side,

but their eyes are

prevented from recognizing him. Sud-

denly there are no longer two but three people walking, and everything becomes different. The

no longer look down at the ground in front of them but into the eyes of the stranger who has ed them and asked, "What are all these things you are discussing as you walk along?" There is some astonishment, even agitation: "You must be

two

friends

the only person

who does not know the things that

have been happening!" Then there follows a long

news about an empty tomb. Here at least is someone to listen, someone who is willing to hear the words

story: the story of loss, the story of puzzling

of disillusionment, sadness, and utter confusion.

Nothing seems

to

make

sense. But

a stranger than to repeat the

it is

known

better to

facts to

tell

each

other.

Then something happens! Something shifts. The stranger begins to speak, and his words ask for 39

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE serious attention.

He had

listened to them;

now

they listened to him. His words are very clear and

He speaks

straightforward.

knew:

their long past

with

of things they already all

that

had happened

during the centuries before they were born, the story of

Moses

who

led their people to freedom,

and the story of the prophets

go of their dearly acquired freewas an all-too-familiar story. Still it sounded

people never to

dom.

It

who challenged their

as if they

let

were hearing

it

for the

first

time.

The difference lay in the storyteller! A stranger appearing from nowhere yet one who, somehow, seems closer than anyone who had ever told that story. The loss, the grief, the guilt, the fear, the glimpses of hope, and the many unanswered questions that battled for attention in their restless

minds,

all

of these were lifted

and placed

in the context of a story

than their own.

began

up by

to offer

this stranger

much

larger

What had seemed so confusing new horizons; what had seemed

what had seemed so extremely sad began to take on the quality of joy! As he talked to them, they gradually came so oppressive began to feel liberating;

to

know that their little lives weren't as little as they

had thought, but part of only embraced itself

many

a great

mystery that not

generations, but stretched

out from eternity to eternity.

The stranger

was no reasadness was part

didn't say that there

son for sadness, but that their

40

"This Is the

Word of God"

of a larger sadness in which joy was hidden. The stranger didn't say that the death they

but that

ing wasn't

real,

rated even

more

life

it

was

— real

were mourn-

a death that inaugu-

The stranger didn't friend who had given

life.

say that they hadn't lost a

them new courage and new hope, but that this loss would create the way to a relationship far beyond any friendship they had ever experienced. Never did the stranger deny

what they

contrary, he affirmed

it

told him.

as part of a

much

To the larger

event in which they were allowed to play a unique role.

was not a soothing conversation. The stranger was strong, direct, unsentimental. There were no easy consolations. It even seemed that he this

Still,

pierced their complaints with a truth they might

have preferred not to know. After

all,

continual

more attractive than facing reality. But the stranger was not the least bit afraid to break through their defenses and to call them far beyond their own narrowness of mind and heart.

complaining

is

"Foolish people," he said. "So slow to believe."

These words go straight to the hearts of the two

men. "Foolish"

is

a

hard word, a word that offends

us and makes us defensive. But

open a

ing

can also crack

and self-consciousness and a whole new knowledge of being human. It

a cover of fear

lead to is

it

wake-up

down

call, a

ripping off of blindfolds, a tear-

of useless protective devices. You foolish

41

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE people, don't you see

— don't you

hear

— don't you

know? You have been looking at a little bush not realizing that you are on the top of a mountain that offers you a worldwide view. You have been staring at an obstacle not willing to consider that the

was put there to show you the right path. You have been complaining about your losses, not obstacle

realizing that these losses are there to enable

receive the gift of

you to

life.

The stranger had to call them "foolish" to make them see. And what is the challenge? To trust. They didn't trust that their experience was more than the experience of an irretrievable loss. They didn't trust that there was anything else to do than to go home and take up their old way of living again. "Foolish people

...

so slow to believe." Slow to be-

slow to trust in the larger scheme of things;

lieve;

slow to jump over their many complaints and cover the wide spectrum of

new

dis-

opportunities;

slow to move beyond the pains of the moment

and see them

as part of a

much

larger healing

process.

This slowness

cause

it

is

not an innocent slowness be-

can entrap us in our complaints and

rowmindedness.

It is

nar-

the slowness that can prevent

which we the end of our

us from discovering the landscape in

come to without ever having known who we

live. It is

lives

what we

quite possible to

are

meant

to

become.

42

Life

is

are

and

short.

We

"This Is the

Word of God"

cannot simply expect that the

little

we

see, hear,

whole of our existence. We are too near-sighted and too hard of hearing for that. Someone has to open our eyes and ears and help us to discover what lies beyond our and experience

own

will reveal to us the

Someone has

perception.

to

make our

hearts

burn!

we walk in sadness and explains the scriptures to us. But we do not know that it is Jesus. We think of him as a stranger who knows less than we do of what is happening in our lives. And still — we know something, we sense something, we intuit something: our hearts begin to burn. At the very moment that he is with us we Jesus s us as

can't fully understand

speak about it is all

over,

it

to

what

is

each other.

we might be

happening.

We can't

Later, yes later,

when

able to say, 'Did not our

hearts burn within us as he talked to us

on the road

and explained the scriptures to us?" But when he walks with us it is all too close for reflection. It is

with

this

mysterious presence that the

"ser-

Word" during each Eucharist wants to bring us in touch, and it is this same mysterious

vice of the

presence that

our

and

is

constantly revealed to us as

lives Eucharistically.

New

we

live

The readings from the Old

Testaments and the homily that follows

these readings are given to us to discern his pres-

ence

as

he walks with us in our sadness. Each day

there are different readings; each day there

43

is

a dif-

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE ferent

word

of explanation or exhortation. Each

day there are words to accompany live

us.

We

cannot

without words that come from God, words to us

up

to a place

can discover what

we

are truly

pull us out of our sadness

from where

we

and

lift

living. It

is

know

important to

that,

although these

words, read or spoken, are there to inform, struct, or inspire us, their first significance

they

make Jesus himself present

to us.

is

in-

that

On our jour-

ney, Jesus explains to us the ages that are about

himself.

Whether we read the book of Exodus, the

Psalms, the Prophets, or the Gospels, they are

there to

make our

presence

is first

of

hearts burn.

all

a

The

all

Eucharistic

presence through the word.

Without that presence through the word, we won't be able to recognize his presence in the breaking of the bread.

We live in a world where words are cheap. Words engulf us. In ments, on billboards and traffic signs, in

pamphlets, booklets, and books,

on blackboards, overhead projectors, flip-charts, screens, and newsrunners. Words move, flicker, turn around, grow bigger, brighter, and fatter. They are presented to us in nally

in

we

say, "Well,

all

sizes

and colors — but

fi-

they are just words." Increased

number, words have decreased in value. Their

main value seems to be informational. Words inform us. We need words in order to know what 44

"This Is the

to

do or how

do

to

it,

Word of God"

where

to

go and

how

to get

there.

not surprising, then, that the words in the

It is

Eucharist are listened to mostly as

form

us.

They

tell

words

that in-

us a story, they instruct, they

onish. Since most of us have heard these words before, they seldom touch us deeply. Often

become

scarcely pay attention to them; they have

too familiar.

touched. story"

We

We

we

don't expect to be surprised or

listen to

them

— whether read from

a

same old book or spoken from as to "the

a pulpit.

The tragedy

is

that the

word then

loses

its

sacra-

The Word of God is sacramental. That means it is sacred, and as a sacred word it makes present what it indicates. When Jesus spoke to the two sad travelers on the road and explained to them the words of scriptures that were about himself, their hearts began to burn, that is mental

quality.

to say, they experienced his presence. Speaking

about himself he became present to them. With his

words he did much more than simply make them think of him, or instruct them about himself, or inspire them with his memory. Through his words he became really present to them. This is what we mean by the sacramental quality of the word. The word creates what it expresses. The Word of God is always sacramental. In the book of Genesis we are told that

God created the world, 45

but in

Hebrew

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE

words for "speaking" and for "creating" are the same word. Literally translated it says, "God spoke light and light was." For God, speaking is creating.

the

When we

say that God's

word

is

we mean presence. On the sacred,

word is full of God's road to Emmaus, Jesus became present through his word, and it was that presence that transformed that God's

sadness to joy and mourning to dancing. This

what happens

in every Eucharist.

The word

that

is is

read and spoken wants to lead us into God's pres-

ence and transform our hearts and minds. Often we think about the word as an exhortation to go out and change our

word

lies,

not in

we have heard it, does

its

lives.

The Gospels

power of

full

the

how we

apply

but in

transforming power that

work

divine

But the

as

its

we

it

to

our

lives after

listen.

are filled with examples of God's

presence in the word. Personally,

I

am

always

touched by the story of Jesus in the synagogue of Nazareth. There he read from Isaiah:

of the Lord is on me, for he has anointed me

The

to

Spirit

bring good news to the

afflicted.

He has sent me to proclaim

liberty to captives,

sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free, to proclaim

a year offavor from the Lord. (Luke 4:18-19)

46

Word of God"

"This Is the

After having read these words, Jesus said, text

being

is

fulfilled

listening." Suddenly, flicted,

"This

today even while you are

it

becomes

clear that the af-

the captives, the blind, and the oppressed

are not people

somewhere

outside of the syna-

gogue who, someday, will be liberated; they are the people who are listening. And it is in the listening that God becomes present and heals.

The Word of God is not a word to apply in our daily lives at some later date; it is a word to heal us through, and

in,

our listening here and now.

The questions therefore

come

to

me

as

I

listen to the

How

are

my

How

God

does

word? Where do

I

dis-

God touching me through

cern the healing hand of the word?

are:

sadness,

mourning being transformed

my

at this

grief,

my

and

very moment?

Do I sense the fire of God's love purifying my heart and giving me new life? These questions lead me word, the sacred place of

to the sacrament of the

Gods At

real presence.

first this

might sound quite

living in a society in

word

is its

new

for a person

which the main value of the

applicability.

know

But most of us

and

ready, generally unconsciously, of the healing

destroying

power of the spoken word. When some-

one says to me,

"I

not just receiving

love you," or

some

words do something move,

al-

in

"I

hate you,"

I

am

useful information. These

me. They make

my

my heart beat, my breathing speed 47

up.

blood

They

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE and think differently. They lift me up to a new way of being and give me another knowledge of myself. These words have the power to heal

make me

feel

or to destroy me.

When Jesus s us on the road and explains the scriptures to us, we must listen with our whole beword that created us will also God wants to become present to us and

ing, trusting that the

heal us.

thus radically transform our fearful hearts.

The sacramental

quality of the

word makes God

present not only as an intimate personal presence,

but also as a presence that gives us a place in the great story of salvation.

present to us

but also the

is

God

The God who becomes

not only the of

Abraham and

Rebecca, Jacob and Leah, the Jeremiah, the

God

of our heart,

Sarah, Isaac

God

and

of Isaiah and

God and Dorothy Day —

of David and Solomon, the

of Peter and Paul, of the

God

St.

Francis

God whose world-embracing love

is

revealed to

us in Jesus, the companion on our journey.

The word of the Eucharist makes us part of the great story of our salvation. lifted

their

up

Our

into God's great story

unique place. The word

us see that our

daily,

lifts

little

stories are

and there given us up and makes

ordinary lives are, in

sacred lives that play a necessary role in the

fact,

fulfill-

ment of God's promises. The written and spoken word of the Eucharist allow us to say with Mary, "He has looked upon the humiliation of his ser48

Word of God"

"This Is the

from now on all generations will call me for the Almighty has done great things for

vant. Yes,

blessed,

me

.

.

.

mindful of his mercy to Abraham and to his

descendants forever."

Here it

we

see that the Eucharist, as

we

celebrate

in the sacred liturgy, calls us to a Eucharistic

a life in

which we

are continuously aware of our

role in the sacred story of

ence through of our lives

is

all

to

life,

Gods

redemptive pres-

The

great temptation

generations.

deny our role

as

chosen people and

so allow ourselves to be trapped in the worries of

our daily

lives.

Without the word that keeps

us up as God's chosen people,

we

lifting

remain, or be-

come, small people, stuck in the complaints that

emerge from our

daily struggle to survive. With-

word that makes our hearts burn, we can't do much more than walk home, resigned to the out the

sad fact that there

nothing

is

Without the word, our tle vitality,

remain

and

little

little lives

little

life

has

little

little

little

the sun.

meaning,

energy. Without the

people with

and die

new under

concerns

lit-

word we

who

deaths. Without the

live

word

we still may be a news item in the local or even a nanewspaper for a day or two, but there will be no generations to call us blessed. Without the word our isolated pains and sorrows may extinguish the Spirit within and make us victims of bitterness and tional

resentment.

We

need the word spoken and explained by the

49

DISCERNING THE PRESENCE one

who

s us

ence known

on the road and makes

to us

our burning hearts. ages us to grateful.

let

—

a

presence

It is

this

first

his pres-

discerned in

presence that encour-

go of our hardened hearts and become

As grateful people

intimacy of our

home

we

the one

hearts burn.

50

can invite into the

who

has

made our

Ill

Inviting the Stranger 'I

Believe

As

they listen to the stranger, something

changes within the two sad

Not only do they sense -

I

a

travelers.

new hope

and a new joy touching their inner-

most being, but their walk has become

less hesi-

The stranger has given them a new sense of direction. "Going home" no longer means returning to the only place left to go. Home has become more than a necessary shelter, a house where they can stay as long as they don't know what else to do. The stranger has given their journey a new meaning. Their empty house has become a place of

tant.

welcome, a place

to receive guests, a place to con-

tinue the conversation they had so unexpectedly

begun.

When

you are feeling only your

losses,

then

everything around you speaks of them. The trees, the flowers, the clouds, the hills and valleys, they all

reflect

When

your sadness. They

all

become mourners.

your dearest friend has died,

all

of nature

speaks of her. The wind whispers her name, the branches, heavy with leaves,

53

weep

for her,

and

INVITING THE STRANGER the dahlias and rhododendrons offer their petals

you keep walking forward your side, opening your heart to

to cover her body. But as

with someone

at

the mysterious truth that your friend's death was

not just the end but also a

new

beginning, not just

the cruelty of fate, but the necessary

dom, not

just

way

to free-

an ugly and gruesome destruction,

but a suffering leading to glory, then you can gradually

new song sounding through creation, home corresponds to the deepest desire

discern a

and going

of your heart.

Of all the words the stranger had spoken, there was one that stands out in the travelers' mind: 'Glory.''

"Was

it

not necessary," he had said, "that

the Christ should suffer before entering into his glory?" Their hearts

and minds were

the images of death and destruction.

was

that

word

"Glory''

It

didn't

still

so full of

And now here

seem

to

fit,

and

on fire and makes them see what they had not been able to see before. It was as if they had seen only the manure that covered the soil, but never the fruits on the trees that had sprung from it. Glory, light, splendor, beauty, truth — they all seemed so unreal and unreachable! But now there were new still,

spoken by

sounds in the ing

this stranger,

air

and

home had become

new a

it

sets their hearts

colors in the fields. Go-

good

thing.

Home calls us.

Home is where the table is — the table to sit around, to eat

and drink with

friends!

54

"I

And the

Believe"

stranger? Hasn't he

become

a friend?

He

makes our hearts burn, he opens our eyes and ears. He is our companion on the journey! Home has become a good place for the friend to come. So they say, "It's nearly evening, and the day is almost over come and stay with us." He doesn't ask for an invitation. He doesn't beg for a place to stay. In fact, he acts as if he wants to go on. But they insist that he come in; they even press him to stay with them. .

.

.

He accepts. He goes in to stay with them. Maybe we are not used to thinking about

the

Eucharist as an invitation to Jesus to stay with us.

We

are

more inclined

to think about Jesus invit-

ing us to his house, his table, his meal. But Jesus

wants to be

invited.

Without an invitation he will

go on to other places.

It is

very important to realize

that Jesus never forces himself vite

on

us.

Unless

we

in-

him, he will always remain a stranger, possibly

a very attractive, intelligent stranger with

we had

an interesting conversation, but

whom

a stranger

nevertheless.

Even

after

he has taken

much

of our sadness

away and shown us that our lives are not as petty and small as we had assumed, he can still remain the one we met on the road, the remarkable person who crossed our path and spoke with us for a while, the unusual personality about

whom we can

speak to our family and friends. I

have many memories of encounters with peo-

55

INVITING THE STRANGER

who made my heart burn but whom I did not invite into my home. Sometimes it happens on a pie

long plane at a party. tell

He

believe

Afterwards

I

sometimes

in a train,

say to

my

me

friends: "Let

whom I met today. A quite fascinating per-

you

son.

sometimes

trip,

said things so remarkable that

what I heard.

It

couldn't

I

seemed that he knew me

in-

my thoughts and speak to me as if he had known me for a long time. Quite timately. Yes,

he could read

special, quite unique, astonishing even.

I

could have met him! But he went on to

know

wish you ... I

don't

where!"

Interesting, stimulating,

strangers

may

when

be,

and inspiring as

I

do not

invite

all

these

them

into

my home, nothing truly happens. I might have a few new ideas, but my life remains basically the same. Without an invitation, which

is

the expres-

sion of the desire for a lasting relationship, the

good news fruit. It

news

that

we

have heard cannot bear lasting

remains "news" among the many types of

that

bombard us every

day.

one of the characteristics of our contemporary society that encounters, good as they may be, don't become deep relationships. Thus our life is filled with good advice, helpful ideas, wonderIt is

ful perspectives,

many other

but they are simply added to the

and perspectives and so leave us "uncommitted." In a society with such an informational overload, even the most significant enideas

56

"I

Believe"

counters can be reduced to "something interest-

among many other interesting

ing"

Only with an

me" can an

invitation to

things.

"come and

stay with

interesting encounter develop into a

transforming relationship.

One of the most decisive moments of the Eucharist — and of our life — is the moment of invitation. Do we say: "It was wonderful to meet you, thank you for your

hope the rest of your journey goes Goodbye!" Or do we say: "I have heard you,

couragement. well.

your advice, and your en-

insights, I

my heart is changing please come into my home and see where and how I live!" This invitation to .

come and

see

is

.

.

the invitation that makes

all

the

difference.

Jesus full

is

a very interesting person; his

of wisdom. His presence

is

words are

heart-warming. His

gentleness and kindness are deeply moving. His

message

is

very challenging. But do

home? Do we want him

we

invite

him

know us behind the walls of our most intimate life? Do we want to introduce him to all the people we live with? Do we want him to see us in our everyday lives? Do we want him to touch us where we are most vulnerable? Do we want him to enter into the back rooms of our homes, rooms that we ourselves prefer to keep safely locked? Do we truly want him to stay with us when it is nearly evening and the day into our

is

almost over?

57

to

come

to

INVITING THE STRANGER

The Eucharist requires

we

tened to his word, than, "This "I

trust you;

We

have to dare to

entrust myself, with

I

body, mind, and soul to you.

I

my

all

want

don't

I

say.

I

to

want you

don't

say,

being,

keep

any secrets from you. You can see everything

and hear everything

lis-

have to be able to say more

interesting!"

is

Having

this invitation.

I

do

to

be

want you to become my most intimate friend. I want you to know me, not only as I walk on the road and talk to my fellow a stranger any longer.

travelers,

but also as

I

I

find myself alone with

innermost feelings and thoughts. I

want

to

come

know

to

And most

you, not just as

of

my

my all,

com-

panion on the journey, but as the companion of

my

soul."

Saying this

people, and

is

not easy, since

we do

are fearful

not easily entrust every part of

Our

ourselves to others.

open and vulnerable and to be known. I

we

is

fear of being completely

equal to our desire to

know

even hide parts of myself from myself! There

are thoughts, feelings,

turbing to

me

that

I

and emotions that are so

prefer to live as

if

dis-

they were

not there. If

I

do not

else? Still

loved,

my

trust myself

deepest desire

and that

know and

to

how

is

is

possible only

can

I

trust

anyone

to love

and to be

am

willing to

if

I

be known.

Jesus reveals himself to us as the

58

Good Shepherd

"I

who knows

Believe"

us intimately and loves us. But do

want to be known by him? Do we want him

room

freely into every

to

we

walk

Do we

of our inner lives?

want him to see our bad side as well as our good, our shadow as well as our light? Or do we prefer him to go on without entering our home? In the end, the question is: "Do we really trust him and entrust every part of ourselves to him?"

When,

after the readings

we say:

and the homily,

believe in God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, in

"I

the Catholic Church, the

communion of

saints, the

forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body,

and

we

life everlasting,"

and entrust ourselves

invite Jesus into

our

home

to his Way.

As a moment of the Eucharistic celebration and, even more, of our Eucharistic life, the Creed is

much more church.

It is

the Greek is

than a

summary

of the doctrine of the

a profession of faith.

word pistis shows,

the great "Yes."

It

is

And

'faith," as

an act of

says "Yes" to the

one

trust. It

who

has

explained the scriptures to us as scriptures that are

about him.

It

is

this

words he spoke but

deep "Yes," not only

also to

to the

him who spoke them,

that brings us finally to the table. If

we

can

say,

we trust you and entrust our lives to you," we beyond just walking into his presence; we dare

"Yes,

go to

open ourselves to communion with him. The two traveling friends invite, indeed,

press,

the stranger to stay with them. "Be our guest," they

59

INVITING THE STRANGER say.

They want

be his

to

hosts.

They

invite the

stranger to lay aside his strangeness and

become

what true hospitality is safe place, where the stranger There were two friends and a

a friend to them. That's

about, to offer a

all

can become friend. stranger. But

now

there are three friends, sharing

the same table.

The table

table

we

is

the place of intimacy. Around the

discover each other.

It's

where "How was

the place

where we ask: your day?" It's the place where we eat and drink together and say: "Come on, take some more!" It

we

is

pray.

It's

the place

the place of old and

for smiles

and

tears.

new

The

stories. It is the

table, too,

is

place

the place

where distance is most painfully felt. It is the place where the children feel the tension between the parents, where brothers and sisters express their anger and jealousies, where accusations are made, and where plates and cups become instruments of violence. Around the table, we know whether there is friendship and community or hatred and division. Precisely

where the absence place

intimacy for also the is

because the table

all

is

the place of

of the household,

the

it is

of that intimacy

most painfully revealed.

When, on the evening before his death, Jesus came together with his disciples around the table, he revealed both intimacy and distance. He shared the bread and the cup as a sign of friendship, but 60

"I

he also

said,

"Look, here with

hand of the man who

When

I

Believe"

is

think about

me on the table is the

betraying me."

my own

youth,

think most

I

often of our family meals, especially on feast days. I



the Christmas decorations, the birth-

day cakes, the Easter candles, and the smiling faces. But

also

I



the words of anger, the walk-

ing away, the tears, the embarrassment, and the

seemingly endless silences.

We

most vulnerable when we sleep or eat together. Bed and table are the two places of intiare

macy. Also the two places of greatest pain. And,

maybe, of these two places, the table it

is

community, friendship, erosity can

the place

be expressed and made

real.

come

into the

of his traveling companions, and he at table

of honor.

He

sits

with them. They offer him the place in the center.

is

him. They look

at

him.

He

They

are alongside

looks at them. There

intimacy, friendship, community.

new

and true gen-

hospitality,

Jesus accepts the invitation to

home down

the most

where all who the household gather and where family,

important because

belong to

is

is

Then something

happens. Something scarcely noticeable to an

untrained eye. Jesus

is

the guest of his disciples,

but as soon as he enters into their home, he be-

comes

their host!

to enter into full

And as their host he invites them communion with him.

61

IV

Entering into

Communion

"Take

and Eat"

When

Jesus enters into the

home

of his

becomes his home. The guest becomes host. He who was in—II vited now invites. The two disciples who trusted the stranger enough to let him enter disciples,

it

into their inner space are

of their host. ble,

now led into the inner life

"Now while he was with them

at ta-

he took the bread and said the blessing; then he

broke

it

and handed

nary, so obvious, else

can you do

to them."

it

and

still

So simple, so

ordi-

— so very different! What

when you

share bread with your

You take it, bless it, break it, and give it. what bread is for: to be taken, blessed, bro-

friends?

That

is

ken, and given. Nothing new, nothing surprising.

happens every

day, in countless

to the essence of living.

out bread that

is

We

homes.

It

It

belongs

can't really live with-

taken, blessed, broken,

and given.

no community, no bond of friendship, no peace, no love, no hope. Yet, with it, all can become new!

Without

it

there

is

Maybe we have simple

human

no

table fellowship,

forgotten that the Eucharist

gesture.

The vestments, the 65

is

a

candles,

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION the altar servers, the large books, the outstretched

arms, the large

altar,

— noth-

the songs, the people

ing seems very simple, very ordinary, very obvi-

We

ous.

often need a booklet to follow the cer-

emony and understand is

meant

that

to

little

its

meaning.

Still,

nothing

be different from what happened

among

village

bread on the

in

the three friends. There

wine on the table. The bread is taken, blessed, broken, and given. The wine is taken, blessed, and given. That is what happens around each table that wants to be a table of is

table; there is

peace.

Every time is

we

to say, into

sides, ble,

our homes, that

invite Jesus into

our

with

life

all its

light

and offer him the place of honor

and dark at

our

ta-

he takes the bread and the cup and hands them

and

to us saying: "Take

and drink,

this is

ber me." Are

we

my

eat, this is

blood.

Do

my

body. Take

this to

remem-

surprised? Not really! Wasn't our

when he talked to us on the road? Didn't we already know that he was not a stranger to us? Weren't we already aware that the one who heart burning

was

crucified by our leaders

Hadn't blessed

we it,

seen

it

broke

it,

and gave

it

it

and with us?

He

did so

listened for long

upper room besuffering, and he has

when we 66

to us?

in the

handed him over to

countless times

it

who had

hours to his word, he did

done

alive

before, that he took the bread,

before the large crowd

fore Judas

was

have come to the

"Take

end of

a long

and Eat"

day and he s us around the table

for a simple meal.

The Eucharist

the most ordinary and the most

is

divine gesture imaginable. That

human,

Jesus. So

is

the truth of

yet so divine; so familiar, yet so

mysterious; so close, yet so revealing! But that

who

the story of Jesus

'being in the form of

did not count equality with

God something

is

God

to

be

grasped, but emptied himself, taking the form of a

human beings are; and being in a human being, he was humbler yet,

slave,

becoming

every

way like

as

even to accepting death, death on

a cross" (Phil.

God who wants to come close to us, so close that we can see him with our own eyes, hear him with our own ears, touch him with our own hands; so close that there is noth2:18).

ing

It is

the story of

between us and him, nothing

that separates,

nothing that divides, nothing that creates distance. Jesus Jesus

is

is

God-for-us, God-with-us, God-within-us.

God

giving himself completely, pouring

himself out for us without reserve. Jesus doesn't

own possessions. He gives all there is to give. "Eat, drink, this is my body, this is my blood this is me for you!" We all know of this desire to give ourselves at

hold back or cling to his

.

the table.

.

We

.

say: "Eat

you. Take more;

it is

and drink;

desire

is

made

this for

there for you to enjoy, to be

strengthened, yes, to feel

What we

I

how much

I

love you."

not simply to give food, but to

67

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION

my guest," we say. And as we encourage our friends to eat from our table, we want to say, "Be my friend, be my companion, be my love — be part of my life — want to give myself to give ourselves. "Be

I

you."

The bread is not become our food; the

In the Eucharist, Jesus gives

simply a sign of his desire to

cup

is

all.

not just a sign of his willingness to be our

and wine become

body and blood in the giving. The bread, indeed, is his body given for us; the wine his blood poured out for us. As God becomes fully present for us in Jesus, so Jesus becomes fully present to us in the bread and the wine of the Eucharist. God not only became flesh for us years ago in a country far away. God also becomes drink. Bread

his

now at this moment of the Eucharistic celebration, right where we are together around the table. God does not hold back; God

food and drink for us

gives

all.

That too tion

That is

is

the mystery of the Incarnation.

the mystery of the Eucharist. Incarna-

and Eucharist are the two expressions of the

immense,

self -giving love

of God.

And

so the sacri-

on the cross and the sacrifice at the table are one sacrifice, one complete, divine self -giving that reaches out to all humanity in time and space. The word that best expresses this mystery of God's total self-giving love is "communion." It is the word that contains the truth that, in and through

fice

Jesus,

God wants,

not only to teach us, instruct us,

68

and Eat"

"Take

or inspire us, but to sires to

and

be

become one with

fully united

with us so that

of us can be bound together in a lasting love.

all

The whole long history of God's

human

us

beings

communion. separations,

It is

is

relationship with

a history of ever-deepening

not simply a history of unities,

and restored

which God searches

mune

God deall of God

us.

but a history in

unities,

for ever-new

ways

intimately with those created in

com-

to

Gods own

image.

Augustine

O

in you,

said:

God," but

ous story of our

we

own

soul

is

when

restless until

I

examine the

salvation,

I

rests

it

tortu-

see not only that

are yearning to belong to God, but that

also is

"My

is

yearning to belong to

us. It

crying out to us: "My heart

may

rest in you,

my beloved

seems

is

as if

God God

restless until

I

From Adam from Abraham and

creation."

and Eve to Abraham and Sarah,

Sarah to David and Bathsheba, and from David and

Bathsheba to Jesus and ever since, to

be received by his own.

you

my

all

port,

love,

I

"I

God

cries out

created you,

guided you, offered you

my

promised you the fulfillment of your

desires:

where

are you,

where

is

I

gave sup-

hearts'

your response,

where is your love? What else must I do to make you love me? I won't give up, I will keep trying. One day,

you will discover

God alive,

how

I

long for your love!"

communion: a unity that is vital and an intimacy that comes from both sides, desires

69

s

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION a

bond

that

is

Nothing forced or

truly mutual.

communion freely offered and received. God goes all the way to make this communion possible. God becomes a child dependent on human care, a boy in need of guidance, a teacher but a

"willed,"

searching for students, a prophet crying for followers,

and,

dead

finally, a

man

pierced by a soldier'

lance and laid in a tomb. At the very end of the story,

he stands there looking

at us,

asking with

eyes full of tender expectation: "Do you love me?"

and again, "Do you love me?" and

a third time,

"Do

you love me?" It

is

God

this intense desire of

to enter into

the most intimate relationship with us that forms the core of the Eucharistic celebration and the Eucharistic

God

life.

not only wants to enter

human

becoming a person who lives in a specific epoch and a specific country, but God wants to become our daily food and drink at any time and

history by

any place. Therefore Jesus takes bread, blesses

and gives

it

to us.

And

our hands and bring

it

then, as to

that the

one

is

recognition.

who

breaks

it,

see the bread in

our mouths to eat

then our eyes are opened and Eucharist

we

it,

it,

yes,

we recognize him.

It is

the full realization

takes, blesses, breaks,

and gives

One who, from the beginning of time, has desired to enter into communion with us. Communion is what God wants and what we want. It is

is

the

70

and Eat"

"Take

the deepest cry of

Gods and our heart,

because

we

made with a heart that can be satisfied only by the one who made it. God created in our heart a yearning for communion that no one but God can, and wants, to fulfill. God knows this. We seldom do. We keep looking somewhere else for that exare

perience of belonging.

We

look at the splendor of

nature, the excitement of history,

and the

attrac-

tiveness of people, but that simple breaking of the

bread, so ordinary and unspectacular, seems such

an unlikely place to find the communion for which

we

yearn.

Still, if

we

have mourned our

losses,

lis-

tened to him on the road, and invited him into our

we

innermost being, nion

we

will

know

have been waiting to receive

communion he has been There

is

in the

Emmaus

leads us right into the mystery of is

the sentence:

is

the same

waiting to give.

one sentence "...

commu-

that the

story that

communion.

It

they recognized him; but he

had vanished from their sight." In the same moment that the two friends recognize him in the

no longer there with they no longer see him sitting with them at the table. When

breaking of the bread, he

them. they

is

When the bread is given them to eat, he has become

eat,

into the

invisible.

When they enter

most intimate communion with Jesus, the

stranger — Precisely

become

friend

— is no

longer with them.

when he becomes most

he also becomes the absent one. 71

present to them,

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION Here

we touch one of the most sacred aspects of

the Eucharist: the mystery that the deepest

nion with Jesus

is

a

commu-

communion that happens in his

two disciples who walked on the road to Emmaus had listened to him for many hours, walked with him from village to village, helped him in his preaching, rested and taken meals with him. During the year, he had become their teacher, absence. The

their guide, their master. All of their

new and .

.

.

better future

they had never fully

hopes for a

were focused on him.

come

to

know him,

Still

to fully

"Now

understand him. Often had he said to them:

you don't understand, but later you will." They didn't really know what he was trying to say. They thought they were closer to him than to any other person they had ever met.

you

this

now ... so

Still

that later,

he kept saying:

when I am no

"I tell

longer

with you, you will and understand." One

him to go so that his Spirit could come and lead them to full intimacy with him. His Spirit would open their eyes and make them fully understand who he is and why he had come to be with them. day he had even said that

it

was good

for

had been no full communion. Yes, they had stayed with him and sat at his feet; yes, they had been his All during his time with the disciples there

disciples,

even his friends. But they had not yet

entered into

full

communion with him.

His

body

and blood and their body and blood had not yet

72

"Take

become

many ways, he

one. In

one over

other, the

and Eat"

there, the

still

one

had been the

who

goes ahead

them and shows them the way. But when they eat the bread he gives them and they recognize of

him, that recognition that,

now, he dwells

is

a

deep

in their

spiritual

awareness

innermost being,

now, he breathes in them, speaks in them, in them.

When

them, their

lives in

them.

yes, lives

they eat the bread that he hands

transformed into his

lives are

no longer they

that,

who

life. It is

but Jesus, the Christ,

live,

who

And right at that most sacred moment

of communion, he has vanished from their sight.

This tion.

is

what we

This too

Eucharistic

is

live in the Eucharistic celebra-

what we

life. It is

holy, so sacred,

live

when we

communion

a

and so

so intimate, so

spiritual that

senses can no longer reach

it.

live a

our corporeal

No longer can we see

him with our mortal eyes, hear him with our mortal ears, or touch him with our mortal bodies. He has come to us at that place within us where the powers of darkness and evil cannot reach, where death has no access.

When in

he reaches out to us and puts the bread

our hands and brings the cup to our

asks us to

let

lips,

go of the easier friendship

had with him so

far

and

to let

go of the

we

Jesus

have

feelings,

emotions, and even thoughts that belong to that friendship. his blood,

When we we accept

eat of his

body and drink of

the loneliness of not having

73

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION

him any longer

our table as a consoling partner

at

in our conversation, helping us to deal with the losses of our daily

life. It is

the loneliness of the

spiritual life, the loneliness of

closer to us than

we

knowing

that he

ever can be to ourselves.

is

It's

the loneliness of faith.

We we

keep crying

will

will

keep listening

meaning;

we

will

have mercy";

out, "Lord,

to the scriptures

keep saying, "Yes,

communion with him goes

far

I

and their

believe." But

beyond

all

of that.

where the light blinds our eyes and where our whole being is wrapped in notIt

brings us to the place

seeing. out:

It is

"God,

It is at

at that

place of

communion that we cry

my God, why have you abandoned me?"

that place, too, that our emptiness gives us

the prayer: "Father, into your hands

I

commend my

Spirit."

Communion with Jesus means becoming like him. With him we are nailed on the cross, with him

we

are laid in the tomb, with

him we

up Com-

are raised

accompany lost travelers on their journey. munion, becoming Christ, leads us to a new realm of being. It ushers us into the Kingdom. There the old distinctions between happiness and sadness,

to

success and failure, praise and blame, health and

and death, no longer exist. There we no longer belong to the world that keeps dividing, judging, separating, and evaluating. There we besickness, life

long to Christ and Christ to us, and with Christ

74

we

"Take

and Eat"

belong to God. Suddenly the two disciples, ate the bread

who

and recognized him, are alone again.

But not with the aloneness with which they began

They are alone, together, and know that a new bond has been created between them. They no longer look at the ground with downcast faces. They look at each other and say: 'Did our hearts not burn when he talked to us on the road and explained the scriptures to us?" their journey.

Communion in them,

The

creates community. Christ, living

new

brought them together in a

Spirit of the risen Christ,

way.

which entered them

through the eating of the bread and drinking of the

made them recognize Christ himself but also each other as of a new community of faith. Communion makes us look at each cup, not only

other and speak to each other, not about the

lat-

who walked with us. We discover each other as people who belong together because each of us now belongs to him. We are est

news, but about him

alone, because

we

he disappeared from our

are together because each of us

sight,

is

in

but

com-

munion with him and so has become one body through him.

We

ate his body,

ing, all of us

the

who

we

drank his blood. In so do-

took from the same bread and

same cup have become one body. Communion

creates community, because the

makes us recognize the God 75

in

God

living in us

our fellow humans.

ENTERING INTO COMMUNION

We

God in the other person. Only God in us can see God in the other person. That is what we mean when we say, "Spirit speaks to Spirit, Heart speaks to Heart, God speaks to God." Our participation in the inner life of God leads us to a new way of participation in each other's lives. This might sound very "unreal," but when we cannot see

live

it,

it

becomes more

real

than the "reality" of

the world. As Paul says: "The blessing-cup,

we

bless, is

it

not a sharing in the blood of Christ,

and the loaf of bread which

we

sharing in the body of Christ? loaf,

which

so we, although there are

single body, for

break,

is it

not a

And as there is one many of us, are one

we all share in the one loaf"

(1 Cor.

16-17).

This

new body

the Spirit of love.

is

a spiritual body, fashioned

It

manifests

itself in

by

very con-

crete ways: in forgiveness, reconciliation, mutual

, outreach to people in need, solidarity

with

all

who suffer, and an ever-increasing concern

for justice

and peace. Thus communion not only

creates community, but

community always

mission.

76

leads to

Going

on a Mission "Go and

Tell"

Everything has changed. The losses are no longer

felt

no longer

is

home

as debilitating;

an empty place. The

who started their journey with downcast faces now look at each other with eyes full of new light. The stranger, who had two

-II

become

friend, has given

vine spirit of

There

is

travelers

joy,

no doubt

them

his spirit, the di-

peace, courage, hope, and love.

alive as before, not as

He

Not the fascinating preacher and

in their minds:

is

healer from Nazareth, but alive as a

alive!

new

breath

within them. Cleopas and his friend have become

new

people.

been given

A new

to them.

heart and a

They

friends for each other

new

also have

— no

spirit

have

become new

longer people

who

can offer each other consolation and as people with a

new

mission who, together, have something to

say,

they

mourn

their losses, but

something important, something urgent, something that cannot remain hidden, something that

must be proclaimed. Happily they have each

79

other.

GOING ON A MISSION Nobody would

believe just one of them. But

they speak together they will get a

when

fair hearing.

The others need to know because they too had placed all their hope in him. There are the eleven who ate with him the evening before his death; there are the disciples,

women and men, who had

been with him for years. They need to know what has happened to them. They need to know that it is not all over. They need to know that he is alive and that they recognized him when he handed the bread to them. There is no time to waste. "Let's hurry," they say to each other. Quickly they put on their sandals, grab their coats and walking staffs, and are on their way back to their friends, back to those

who

who had right.

still

might not

know

that the

heard from the angels that he

The story summarizes

it

all

is

women

alive are

few

in a very

words: "They set out that instant and returned to Jerusalem."

What

and their return. and

home" is the difference between doubt

a difference

faith,

It

between

their "going

despair and hope, fear and love.

the difference

between two

dispirited

human

ings dragging themselves along the road and friends walking fast, running even at times, cited about the

news they have

Returning to the city ter the

is

is

be-

two

all

ex-

for their friends.

not without danger. Af-

execution of Jesus, his disciples are

They wonder what

It

afraid.

their fate will be. But having

80

"Go and

Tell"

recognized their Lord, their fear

is

gone, and they

become witnesses of the resurrection — the costs notwithstanding. They realize that the same people who hated Jesus may hate them, that the same people who killed Jesus may kill them. Their return may indeed cost them their lives. They may be asked to witness, not only with words, but are free to

with their

own

blood. But they no longer fear mar-

tyrdom. The risen Lord, present in their innermost

them with a love stronger than death. Nothing can hold them back from returning home even when home no longer means a "safe" being, has filled

place.

The Eucharist concludes with a mission. "Go, now and tell!" The Latin words "Ite Missa est," with which the priest used to conclude the Mass, literally

mean: "Go,

Communion

is

this

is

your mission."

not the end. Mission

is.

nion, that sacred intimacy with God, final

Commu-

is

not the

moment of the Eucharistic life. We recognized

him, but that recognition

is

not just for us to

sa-

vor or to keep as a secret. As Mary of Magdala, so

two friends had heard deep in themselves words "Go and tell." That's the conclusion of

too the the

the Eucharistic celebration; that too

"Go and

is

What you have

of the Eucharistic

life.

heard and seen

not just for yourself.

is

brothers and sisters and for ceive

it.

Go, don't

all

tell.

who

the final call

It is

for the

are ready to re-

linger, don't wait, don't hesitate,

81

GOING ON A MISSION but

move now and return to

you came, and

those

let

their hiding places afraid of, that It is

of

he

is

whom

you

left

behind

is, first

who are no strangers to us. have heard about Jesus

like us,

but have become discouraged. The mission

ways

first

of

who

those

all

to our

own, our family, our

not a very comfortable realization.

it

harder to speak about Jesus to those intimately than to those

deal with lies a

ity

is al-

friends,

are an intimate part of our lives. That

is

me

in

risen, risen indeed."

important to realize that the mission

They know us and,

which

know that there is nothing to be

a mission to those

all,

the places from

my

"peculiar

is

who know

have never had to

ways of being."

great challenge here.

of our experience

who

always find

I

Somehow the

Still

there

authentic-

tested by our parents, our

spouses, our children, our brothers and

sisters, all

who know us all too well. Many times we will hear: "Well, that's him again. Well, that's her again. We know what this is all those

about. It

We

have seen

all

will ... as before."

truth to this.

Why

excitement before.

Often there

should they trust us

come running home take us seriously?

this

all

We

excited?

Why

is

a lot of

when we

should they

are not that trustworthy;

we

from the rest of our family and friends. Moreover, the world is full of stories, full of rumors, full of preachers and evangelists. There is good reason for some scepticism. Those are not that different

82

"Go and

who

didn't

go with us

worse than

ter or

church for

a

to the Eucharist are

no

bet-

we are. They have heard the story

Some were

of Jesus.

Tell"

baptized;

some even went

to

while or for a long time. But then,

gradually, the story of Jesus

Church became

became

just a story.

obligation, the Eucharist a ritual.

Somewhere it all became a sweet or bitter memory. Somewhere something died in them. And why should anyone who knows us well suddenly believe us

when we That

is

return from the Eucharist?

the reason

but the Eucharistic

Each

day, yes,

why it is not just the Eucharist, life

that

makes the

each moment of the

difference.

day, there

is

the

pain of our losses and the opportunity to listen to a

word that asks us to choose to live these losses as a way to glory. Each day, too, there is the possibility to invite the stranger into our home and to let him break the bread for us. The Eucharistic celebration has summarized for us what our life of faith is all

we

home to live it as long and as fully as we can. And this is very difficult, because everyone at home knows us so well: our

about, and

have to go

impatience, our jealousies, our resentments, and

our many

little

games.

And then

there are our bro-

ken relationships, our unfulfilled promises, and our unkept commitments. Can

we

really say that

we

have met him on the road, have received his body

and blood and become

home

is

ready to

living Christs?

test us.

83

Everyone

at

GOING ON A MISSION But there

is

something

prise awaiting the

came running were gathered friends

knew

to bring

it

to .

.

.

There

is

a great sur-

two excited companions who the room where their friends

eager to

already!

was not new

had a chance to

else.

tell

tell

the news. These

The good news they had

after

all.

Before they even

their story, the eleven

and

companions said, "The Lord has indeed risen and has appeared to Simon." It is quite humorous. Here they come running in, out of breath, all ex-

their

cited,

only to discover that those

who

stayed in the

had heard the news, even though they had not met him on the road or sat at the table with him. Jesus had appeared to Simon, and Simon city already

more

was

a lot

who

hadn't stayed with

thinking that

and eager

it

credible than these

was

all

two

them but had gone home over. Sure, they were glad

to hear their story, but they

another affirmation

There are many

disciples

that, indeed,

brought

he was

just

alive.

ways in which Jesus appears and

many ways in which he lets us know that he is alive. What we celebrate in the Eucharist happens in many ways other than we might think. Jesus, who gave us bread already, touched the hearts of others long before he met us on the road.

He

called some-

one by her name, and she knew that it was him; he showed his wounds to some, and they knew that it was him. We have our stories to tell, and it is important that

we tell them,

but they are not the only

84

"Go and

stories.

that

We

we are

ten to

Tell"

have a mission to excited about

what others have

be told and bring

it,

fulfill

but

to say.

first

we

Then our

it is

good

have to stories

lis-

can

joy.

All of this points to community.

who were

and

The two

friends,

able to speak to each other about their

burning hearts, were beginning to enter into a relationship with

one another, a relationship

new built

on the communion they had both experienced. Their

communion with

Jesus was, indeed, the be-

ginning of community. But only the beginning.

meet the others who also believed that he is risen, who also saw him or heard that he is alive. They needed to listen to their stories, each one different from the others, and to discover the many ways in which Jesus and his Spirit work

They needed

among It is

to

his people.

our experience of him. But Jesus his Spirit faith

down to our Jesus, to to our way of knowing

so easy to narrow Jesus

is

left

his love,

us so as to send his

blows where

the place

it

Spirit,

and

wants. The community of

where many

stories about the

way

of Jesus are being told. These stories can be very different

from each

to conflict. But as

other.

we

the Spirit manifesting in

words

They might even seem

keep listening attentively to itself

through many people,

as well as in silence,

through confronta-

tion as well as invitation, in gentleness as well as

firmness, with tears as well as smiles

85

— then we can

GOING ON A MISSION

we

gradually discern that

belong together,

body knitted together by the In the Eucharist

Spirit of Jesus.

are asked to leave the table

our friends to discover with them that

and go

to

Jesus

truly alive

is

we

one

as

and

us together to

calls

new people — a people

become

a

of the resurrection.

Here the story of Cleopas and his friend ends. ends with the two friends

It

telling their story to the

eleven and their companions. But the mission does

not end here;

it

has scarcely begun. The telling of

the story of what happened the table all

is

on the road and around

the beginning of a

the days of our lives until

life

we

of mission, lived

see

him

again face

to face.

Forming building a

community with family and friends, body of love, shaping a new people of a

the resurrection:

can

live a life

of this

all

proclaim together to

we

rather, to enable us to

it is,

all

white and black, poor and last

not just so that

protected from the dark forces that

dominate our world;

have the

is

people, young and old, rich, that

word, that hope

is

death does not

real

and God

is

alive.

The Eucharist that has freed us

is

always mission. The Eucharist

from our paralyzing sense of

loss

and revealed to us that the Spirit of Jesus lives within us empowers us to go out into the world and to bring

good news

to the poor, sight to the blind,

liberty to the captives,

and

86

to proclaim that

God

"Go and

shown

has

Tell"

again his favor to

all

people. But

we

are

we are sent with our brothers who also know that Jesus lives within

not sent out alone;

and

sisters

them.

The movement flowing from the Eucharist is the movement from communion to community to ministry. Our experience of communion first sends us to our brothers and sisters to share with them our stories and build with them a body of love. Then, as

community,

reach out to I

to

am

we

all

can move in

directions and

people.

deeply aware of

go from communion

ing community.

all

My

my own

tendency to want

to ministry without form-

individualism and desire for

personal success ever and again tempt it

me

to

do

alone and to claim the task of ministry for my-

self.

But Jesus himself didn't preach and heal alone. us

how he spent the night

communion with God,

the morning to form

Luke, the Evangelist, in

tells

community with the twelve apostles, and the afternoon to go out with them ministering to the crowds. Jesus calls us to the same sequence: from communion to community to ministry. He does not want us to go out alone. He sends us out together, two by two, never by ourselves. And so we can witness as people who belong to a body of faith. We are sent out to teach, to heal, to inspire, and to offer

hope

unique

to the

skill,

world — not

as the exercise of

our

but as the expression of our faith that

87

GOING ON A MISSION

we

all

have to give comes from him

who

brought

us together.

We

mission.

live in a

losses: the merciless

always a

life

of

world groaning under

its

Eucharistically

lived

Life

is

wars destroying people and

the hunger and starvation dec-

their countries,

imating whole populations, crime and violence

holding millions of men,

children

Cancer and AIDS, cholera, malaria, and

in fear.

many

women, and

other diseases devastating the bodies of

countless people; earthquakes, floods, and traffic disasters

the story of everyday

... it's

newspapers and

television screens.

endless losses, and many,

low human

if

life filling

It is

a

the

world of

not most, of our

fel-

beings walk with faces downcast on

They say in some way or another: "Our hope had been but we lost hope." the surface of this planet.

.

This

is

the world

with burning hearts and with

task.

and open

ears

What can this

him on

.

we are sent to live in Eucharisti-

cally, that is, to live

open

.

seems an impossible small group of people who met eyes.

It

the road, in the garden, or at the lakeside

do in such

a dark

of God's love

and violent world? The mystery

that our

is

burning hearts and our

re-

ceptive ears and eyes will be able to discover that the

One we met

in the intimacy of

tinues to reveal himself to us sick, the all

our homes con-

among

the poor, the

hungry, the prisoners, the refugees, and

people

who

live in fear.

88

"Go and

Here to

we come

go and

tell

to realize that mission

are sent. Often mission

it

from those

it is

when

is

no person

who

In the long run, mission it

is

whom we

to

also receiv-

is

true that the Spirit of Jesus blows

wants, there

Spirit.

not only

thought of exclusively

is

of giving, but true mission

ing. If

is

others about the risen Lord, but also

to receive that witness

in

Tell"

as

much

cannot give that possible only

is

receiving as giving, as

being cared for as caring.

We

where

much

are sent to the sick,

the dying, the handicapped, the prisoners, and the

news of

refugees to bring them the good resurrection. But

we will soon be burned out if we

cannot receive the

whom we That

Spirit of the

Lord from those to

are sent.

Spirit,

the Spirit of love,

is

hidden in their

poverty, brokenness, and grief. That said:

the Lords

is

why Jesus

"Blessed are the poor, the persecuted,

and

who mourn." Each time we reach out to them they in turn — whether they are aware of it or not — those

will bless us

with the

Spirit of Jesus

and so become

our ministers. Without this mutuality of giving and receiving, mission

and ministry

nipulative or violent.

When

easily

become ma-

only one gives and the

other receives, the giver will soon

become an

op-

when

the

pressor and the receivers, victims. But

giver receives and the receiver gives, the circle of

begun in the community of the grow as wide as the world. love,

89

disciples,

can

GOING ON A MISSION It

belongs to the essence of the Eucharistic

life

make this circle of love grow. Having entered into communion with Jesus and created commuto

who know that he

nity with those

is alive,

we now

can go and the many lonely travelers and help

them discover to share.

We

that they too have the gift of love

are

no longer

afraid of their sadness

and pain, but can ask them simply: "What are you talking about as

we

you walk along the road?" And

will hear stories of

rejection,

immense

loneliness, fear,

abandonment, and sadness.

We

must

lis-

ten, often for a long time, but there are also op-

words or simple gestures: "Didn't you know that what you are complaining about can also be lived as a way to something new? Maybe it is impossible to change what has happened to you, but you are still free to choose how portunities to say with

to live

it."

Not everyone

them

invite us into their lives to

Only seldom

and only a few will

will listen to us

will

it

be possible

at their table.

to offer life-giving

bread and truly heal a heart that has been broken. Jesus himself didn't heal everyone, nor change

everyone's

that radical their trust

time there

Most people simply don't believe changes are possible and can't give

life.

when they meet the is

strangers. But every

a real encounter leading

hope and from bitterness to see some of the darkness being

to

90

from despair

we

will

dispelled and

life,

gratitude,

"Go and

Tell"

once again, breaking through the boundaries of death.

This has been, and continues to be, the experi-

ence of those it

who

live a Eucharistic life.

They see

as their mission to persistently challenge their

fellow travelers to choose for gratitude instead of

resentment and for hope instead of despair.

few times that this challenge enough to make their lives worth

the

smile breaking through tears cle

— the

miracle of

Statistically,

Those

who

How many

accepted are

living.

To see

to witness a mira-

this

is

very interesting.

"How many people

did you reach?

changes did you bring about?

many illnesses

a

joy.

none of

ask:

is

is

And

did you cure?

How

How much joy did you

create?" will always receive disappointing answers.

Jesus and his followers did not have great success.

The world

a dark world, full of violence,

is still

corruption, oppression, and exploitation. likely

and is

but

is

not:

the Eucharist being celebrated,

people

who come lies in

the

when does

power of the

world does not recognize the the darkness.

It

where

are the

together around the table and

break bread together, and

The world

will

"How soon "Where and when?" Where

always be! The question

how many?"

It

never did;

it

it

happen?

evil one.

The

light that shines in

never

will.

But there

who, in the midst of this world, live with the knowledge that he is alive and dwells are people

91

GOING ON A MISSION he has overcome the power of death and opens the way to glory. Are there people who come together, who come around the table and do

within

us, that

what he

who

did, in

memory

of him? Are there people

keep telling each other the stories of hope

and, together, go out to care for their fellow beings, not pretending to solve

all

man and

bring a smile to a dying

human

problems, but to a

little

hope

to a

lonely child?

so

It is

little,

so unspectacular, yes, so hidden,

this Eucharistic life, but

tard seed, like a smile

it is

on

mus-

like yeast, like a

a baby's face.

It is

what

hope and love alive in a world that is constantly on the brink of self-destruction. The Eucharist, sometimes, is celebrated with

keeps

faith,

great ceremony, in splendid cathedrals and basilicas.

But more often

people

know

about.

it is

It

a prison cell, an attic

a "small" event that

happens

—

in a living

It

happens

with gestures so simple that or hidden,

it

in secret,

happens outsiders don't even

without vestments, candles, or incense.

that

room,

out of sight of the big

movements of the world.

know

few

It

takes place. But big or small, festive

it is

the same event, revealing that

stronger than death and love stronger than

92

life is

fear.

Conclusion

The word

means literally "thanksgiving." A Eucharistic life is one lived in gratitude. The story, which is also our story, of the two friends walking to Emmaus has shown that gratitude

is

"Eucharist"

not an obvious attitude toward

life.

Grati-

tude needs to be discovered and to be lived with

Our

great inner attentiveness.

losses,

our experi-

ences of rejection and abandonment, and our many

moments of

disillusionment keep pulling us into

anger, bitterness, let

and resentment.

When we simply

the "facts" speak, there will always be enough

facts to

convince us that

life,

in the end, leads to

nothing and that every attempt to beat that fate

is

only a sign of profound naivete. Jesus gave us the Eucharist to enable us to choose gratitude.

It

is

a choice we, ourselves, have to

make. Nobody can make

it

for us. But the Eucharist

prompts us to cry out to God for mercy, to listen to the words of Jesus, to invite him into our home, to enter into

good news

communion with him and proclaim

to the world;

it

opens the

of gradually letting go of our

93

possibility

many resentments

Conclusion

and choosing

to

be

grateful.

The Eucharistic

cel-

ebration keeps inviting us to that attitude. In our daily lives

we

have countless opportunities to be

we might not recognize these opportunities. Before we fully realized, we have already said: "This is too much for me. I have no choice but to be angry and to let my

grateful instead of resentful. At

anger show. Life is."

and

isn't fair,

However, there

is

first,

I

can't act as

if it

always the voice that, ever

and again, suggests that

we

are blinded

by our

own

understanding and pull ourselves and each other into a hole.

It is

the voice that calls us "foolish," the

voice that asks us to have a completely

our

lives, a

our

losses,

new look

look not from below, where

but from above, where

we

at

count

God offers us his

glory.

—

Eucharist

from above.

thanksgiving

It is

for ourselves.

It

—

the gift that is

to

in the end,

we

cannot fabricate

be received.

It is

fered and asks to be freely received. That the choice

is!

We

can choose to

comes

let

freely ofis

where

the stranger

continue his journey and so remain a stranger. But

we

can also invite him into our inner

lives, let

him

touch every part of our being and then transform our resentments into gratitude.

do as

this. In fact,

we make

most people

—

part

don't have to

don't. But as often

that choice, everything,

even the most

become new. Our little lives become of the mysterious work of God's sal-

trivial things,

great

We

94

Conclusion

vation.

Once

that

casual, or futile

happens, nothing

is

accidental,

any more. Even the most

insignifi-

cant event speaks the language of faith, hope, and,

above

all,

love. That's the Eucharistic life, the life in

which everything becomes a way of saying "Thank you" to him who ed us on the road.

95

ment. Just as the disciples on the road Emmaus ed through all these stages so our participation in the Eucharist mirrors each one. Along this five-step journey, the disciples travel, grow, and learn. Their hearts at first are laden with failure and loss, then come to burn with recognition, and finally to to

open

burst

with gratitude

and new

life.

the "eucharistic" moment: the goal of thanksgiving, of giving thanks to the One who has made us whole. This

is

From mourning to discernment, from and finally from community to the charge to go forth invitation to intimacy,

and

witness: With Burning Hearts calls

us to

experience

all

of this journey, to

know that what we celebrate and what we are called to live are one and the same.

Henri

Nouwen

lecturer

who

Community

a popular author and at the Daybreak

is

lives

Canada.

in

His

many

books include iGraciasi Walk with Jesus,

and A Cry

for

Mercy.

Cover design: Alicia Grant Cover art: TRINITY © 1994 Steve Hawley

ORBIS

^S^ BOOKS

Maryknoll,

New York 10545

t is

the intense desire of God to

enter into the

most intimate

relationship with us that forms

the core of the Eucharistic cel-

ebration and the Eucharistic

life.

God

not

human history by becoming a person who lives in a specific epoch and a specific country, but God only wants to enter

wants to become our daily food and drink at

any time and any

takes bread, blesses

And then,

as

and bring

it

we

place. Therefore Jesus it,

and

gives

see the bread in

it

our hands

mouths to eat it, yes opened and we recognize

to our

then our eyes are

to us.

y

him.

Henri Nouwen

ISBN 0-88344-984-6

90000

9 '780883"449844